Who Are You and What Have You Done With Pastor Swank?
There was a time when the only thing Pastor Swank had in common with hippies was that he never bathed. But now he’s come out in favor of bringing the troops home from Iraq:
Multinational forces are carrying the heavy burden for Iraq security. It’s not working. To support the troops, bring them home.
My God! He sounds like a MoveOn.org press release! But it really is Swank. Check out the fifth paragraph:
It’s stupid; but that’s the way Islam “thinks.� Therefore, on with the imploding of Iraq, though disappointing it will be for those who dreamt of a democracy overlaying a Muslim country — the first of its kind. However, one cannot take a hard-worked democracy such as is in America and make it into a ready-to-sprout democracy plant flowering over a killing cult.
Tune in next week when Swank will fill us in on his grand plan to levitate the Pentagon.
ready-to-sprout democracy plant flowering over a killing cult
Now I have a “Helter Skelter” earworm. Dangit.
I like the idea of the ready-to-sprout democracy plant. Are they like sea monkeys? Can I buy one at the garden shop as a present, or do they only come by mail order?
But no more forces from non-Muslim countries should give their lives for a cult and country that really do not appreciate personal freedoms.
Sorry. I was distracted by the Religious Right telling me that protesting is support for the terrorists, that women shouldn’t be able to decide what to do with their own bodies, and that homo nups are teh devil. What were you saying about cults and personal freedoms?
Are they like sea monkeys?
in fact, they are exactly like sea monkeys. I can totally see all of the Korner Kids squinting and chanting “I do see the democracy flowering! I do see it!”
Or disappointing it will be for wingnuts global despising death cult immams and muslims of terror.
Damn, this dood makes my brain hurt…
mikey
Even if that’s not the real Swank, he’s still got a way with syntax tortured.
Wait, I thought Turkey was the first Muslim democracy. Or is he talking about the first attempt at imposing democracy by bombing the shit out of the voters first? That’s kinda unique, innit?
What about a democracy plant over a Thrill Kill Kult?
This is not surprising. When Buckley came out with his column in February saying the Iraq war has been a failure, it seemed pretty clear that he was handing the wingnuts their exit strategy: “Those A-Rabs are just too uncivilised to become a democracy.”
This will become the wingnut excuse for the loss of the Iraq war, along with the “stab-in-the-back liberals” meme.
You can count on seeing more of this crap.
I like the idea of the ready-to-sprout democracy plant. Are they like sea monkeys?
Actually I think he was picturing something more like a Shia-pet.
I was watching Zenon, Girl of the 21st Century last weekend (hey, I have an 8-year-old daughter–no wisecracks!), and I had a revelation:
Pastor Swank is from the year 2049! Check out these quotes from the movie:
“ONE sin minor and my life is a living black hole!”
“My parents are in trouble major!”
It explains so much.
When Buckley came out with his column in February saying the Iraq war has been a failure, it seemed pretty clear that he was handing the wingnuts their exit strategy: “Those A-Rabs are just too uncivilised to become a democracy.�
Oh, won’t that be sweet? Then we can break out the clips of the 2004 State of the Union address:
We also hear doubts that democracy is a realistic goal for the greater Middle East, where freedom is rare. Yet it is mistaken, and condescending, to assume that whole cultures and great religions are incompatible with liberty and self-government. I believe that God has planted in every human heart the desire to live in freedom. And even when that desire is crushed by tyranny for decades, it will rise again.
Wait, I thought Turkey was the first Muslim democracy.
Yeah, them and the few dozen other democracies in the Organization of the Islamic Conference.
Do the ‘nuts really think there are no Muslim democracies?
“Nobody Comes Home From War Unchanged”
This quote is from Paul Rieckhoff, Executive Director of the Iraq Afghanistan Veterans of America IAVA.org/. It links to a short eight minute film about his organization.
Regardless of your political affiliation or opinion of our involvement in Iraq you owe it to yourself and to American’s military men and women to watch this video. It helps summarize “The True Cost of War.”
QuestionItNow – Still In Iraq
Oh, won’t that be sweet? Then we can break out the clips of the 2004 State of the Union address:
Mmmm….yesss…more cognitive dissonance for the masses.
Shorter Swank: I hate to be the one to coin this phrase, but it turns out you can’t spread Democracy at gunpoint. Huh.
“Yeah, them and the few dozen other democracies in the Organization of the Islamic Conference.”
Yeah, like Lebanon and the Palestinians. Oops. I think when Swank said, “the first of its kind“, I think he meant the first Muslim democracy to be a kiss-W’s-ass client state of America.
You understand that he probably is envisioning redeployment of the troops along the border to keep the whatever-it-is-we’re-calling-them-to-humorously-mock-the-wingnuts-today out, and just fucking nuking Iraq, and probably anyone else breathing over there for good measure.
The enemy of my enemy is usually some fuckwit I want nothing to do with. Just so with Swank.
Haha! No, shargash. The Repubs didnt’ get a chance to try to steal those elections, so they CAN’T be “real” democracies! NOw, maybe if they started up a branch of College Republicans…
Is it just me, or has Pastor Swank begun to morph into Charles Nelson Reilly?
Multinational forces? Surely the proper nomenclature is “forces multinational”.
(snap, snap, snap) Groovy, Pastor Swank! Go, cat, go!
I like the idea of the ready-to-sprout democracy plant. Are they like sea monkeys?
Actually I think he was picturing something more like a Shia-pet.
Holy crap, I think that’s a bannable offense.
Relax, everyone. Swank will remain swanktastic as long as he has his blinding hatred of teh homo-nups to guide him, so all remains keul. Besides, I’m sure he’s up for a war on Iran!