Anyone who glows is an Iranian Nookyaler Scientist. Anyone who doesn’t glow is a well-disciplined Iranian Nookyaler Scientist. GET SOME!

Christ, should have trusted the shorter. I’ll take Obama’s non-progressive progressivism any day over this crap.

Had to get out of the boat to make a drug deal ashore, so I left a brief comment straightening Ms. Gordon out on the historical record.

No, wait, there is no way to comment there, so I didn’t. Uh oh. Better see what else I thought I did today, but didn’t.

And the same goes for all those yankee assholes that tried to invade the south and got their asses kicked by grampa.

Hey! She can see Vietnam from her porch, actually!!

So the author quotes diplomat Henry Kissinger, author of Diplomacy, originator of the phrase “shuttle diplomacy,” orchestrator of the opening of U.S. diplomatic relations with China, the diplomat who negotiated the end of the Yom Kippur War that eventually led to normalization of diplomatic relations between Israel and Egypt, to prove that diplomacy never works?

And Tehran will be able to continue its march toward victory unimpeded.

I curse the politicians that didn’t allow American troops to impede North Vietnam.

Looks like a broken rubber mated with a 1976 Chevy pickup.

Someday, I want a president who will take every tinpot warmongering chickenhawk, draft them into the military, airdrop them behind enemy lines, and tell ’em to fight their way to glory.

As I remember, our victory involved Stallone and exploding arrows.

tinpot warmongering chickenhawk

I anxiously await the remainder of this janusnode recipe.

This ain’t nothing new. The line “we lost in Vietnam because we were too kind and charitable, our heart was too big, we should’ve killed all the brutes” has been the conservative line since even before 1973.

And as long as we’re talking cliches, one of the articles it links to appears to be yet another rendition of “why do Jews vote liberal?” (LOL, maybe because of 2,000 years of experience living in “Christian countries founded on Christian values.”)

So the author quotes diplomat Henry Kissinger, author of Diplomacy, originator of the phrase “shuttle diplomacy,” orchestrator of the opening of U.S. diplomatic relations with China, the diplomat who negotiated the end of the Yom Kippur War that eventually led to normalization of diplomatic relations between Israel and Egypt, to prove that diplomacy never works?

Well, Egypt still exists, as does Lebanon and (in some mutilated form) Palestine, China of course as well. So no, it didn’t work. In the conservative world, diplomacy means sending in the Vorta to accept surrender before you send in the Jem’Hadar (unveiled DS9 reference).

The line “we lost in Vietnam because we were too kind and charitable, our heart was too big, we should’ve killed all the brutes” has been the conservative line since even before 1973.

Maybe 1902: Conrad: “Exterminate the brutes.”

And, of course, Coppola riffing on Conrad: “Drop the bomb! Kill them all!”

Because compared to invading a divided country with a small army, invading a united one with a big army should be a cakewalk! That is, if you like landmines on your cake.

Iran, cognizant of the West’s weakness, has taken out the perfect insurance policy: as long as it’s talking, feeding the West’s hope for compromise, Western leaders will oppose both new sanctions and military action. And Tehran will be able to continue its march toward victory unimpeded.

Yeah, that weak West – America & the UK sure do act like wimps, alright. They haven’t even turned a new country into the fucking moon in seven whole years! More like Panty-West, amirite?

I’m presuming she means military victory. March toward victory over whom, exactly? Israel? One or two nukes (at best) versus +300 is going to be one hella flukey victory, girl. Get back to us when you can count past two, or have a little sit-down with some people who actually fought in Indochina so they can tell you all the myriad ways your analogy smells like ass … & for Christ’s sake, GET THEE TO THE EYEBROW STORE & TRY ON A PAIR.

Brrrrr.

Or let’s try 1900 years ago…

Tacitus: They make a desert and call it peace.

Iran are negotiating in bad faith, because they know we can’t win a war against them. Therefore, we should forget about negotiations and just invade already.

Why does History hate America?

Are the clusterfucks of Iraq and Afghanistan not keeping her entertained?

Anyone not aroused by two simultaneous clusterfucks isn’t trying.

You know who’s been asking for a beatdown for the longest time? Luxembourg.

Is it wrong for me to long for a war between Andorra and Luxembourg? Never mind: if it’s wrong, I don’t want to be right.

It’ll be like a Fairy Tale war!

Golly, you know what’s the best negotiating tool in diplomacy? The threat of total genocide.

Sweeeeet Jesus!

We make a dessert and call it pie.
~

We won Vietnam? Well I guess that lets all the DFHs and weak-kneed liberals who supposedly lost Vietnam through an inconsiderate act of Bellus Interruptus off the hook.

Seriously, I often wonder how you all find these fucknuggets. Is there way to create a Google Alert for Rampant Dumbassery?

It’ll be like a Fairy Tale war!

Don’t mess with the unicorn cavalry.

We had to destroy the village in order to save it.

We had to order the G.I. Joe Village to destroy it.

We can’t invade Iran. Where are we going to find a leader crazier and less popular than Ahmadinejad to be our puppet?

“Glenn Beck, the new Shah of Iran.”

It has a ring to it.

Don’t mess with the unicorn cavalry.

Which I can only assume Andorra has, and the riders are delightfully snarktastic witches.

I, too, long to sit on the sidelines of that war.

Would he still have a tv show, though?

“Glenn Beck, the new Shah of Iran.”

And thanks to Amenapajamas the Iranians are used to deranged leaders who shriek “Conspiraseeeee!” when you give ’em a little squeeze.

Maybe the final “n” in Contentions is upside-down.

Would he still have a tv show, though?

Yup. The blackboard will be the size of a football field and framed in solid gold.

We will trade one Ayatollah and two Mullahs for Glenn Beck, Pastor Swank, and a warmonger to be named later.

I blame Obama for the Blockquote fail.

Always. Trust. The. Shorter.™

As one huge proponent of the war in Vietnam once said, Evelyn, “Instant karma’s gonna getcha”.

You know who’s been asking for a beatdown for the longest time? Luxembourg.

And Belgium. Fat Belgian bastards…

Problem with all these potential new hotspots of international strife and discord is that there aren’t enough minorities in Belgium or Luxembourg. I suppose Andorra has quite a few brown-ish people, and the American Talibangelist movement seems to be more accepting of the notion that Catholics aren’t Christians. Still, I think it’d be a tough sell.

On the plus side – counter-insurgency operations against Basques!

Are the clusterfucks of Iraq and Afghanistan not keeping her entertained?

IS THAT NOT WHY SHE IS HERE!?!

Problem with all these potential new hotspots of international strife and discord is that there aren’t enough minorities in Belgium or Luxembourg.

So? Belgian is the new AYrab, K? We just run it thru the FOX news grinder…

actor212:
And Belgium. Fat Belgian bastards…

Wait, is that the Walloons or the Phlems?

Actor, on your tombstone, it will say “Always trust the shorter.”

And as long as we’re discussing the extermination of little European places, could someone make sure Corsica’s on the target list? Thanks in advance.

Belgian is the new AYrab, K?

Too many blondes. I know you’re looking forward to being part of the Expeditionary Forces and pillaging chocolate and lambics, but there’s no way that the US is going to invade a country that white not named Germany.

Consider the following:
– recent electoral difficulties and significant international intervention
– very recently proclaimed a New Republic
– dark-skinned natives
– all sorts of funny people and place names
– currently in talks with communist China about oil exploration
– already hated by the whackaloon segment of the US electorate.

The next target for invasion is Kenya.

So, hey, if you were to guess which right wing pundit would be the first to dump on the recently deceased Elizabeth Edwards, who would it be?

None other than the Donalde

Still, at her death bed and giving what most folks are calling a final goodbye, Elizabeth Edwards couldn’t find it somewhere down deep to ask for His blessings as she prepares for the hereafter? I guess that nihilism I’ve been discussing reaches up higher into the hard-left precincts than I thought.

Stay classy, Donalde!

yo, g – Ann Aouthouse is a contender, too

I know you’re looking forward to being part of the Expeditionary Forces and pillaging chocolate and lambics, but there’s no way that the US is going to invade a country that white not named Germany.

Unless it’s named France. Given the price/quality ratio of French food, that pillaging looks even more attractive in that case.

Wait, is that the Walloons or the Phlems?

Burn ’em all, let the Luxies sort ’em out…

Actor, on your tombstone, it will say “Always trust the shorter longer.”

Fixed for egoism.

Too many blondes.

So? You’ve never heard of the secret “Shock and Clairol” plan to strafe them with hair dye first????

could someone make sure Corsica’s on the target list?

I’m looking at Malta.

…could someone make sure Corsica’s on the target list? Thanks in advance.

Ooooh, now that’s a possibility. The Occupation would be fantabulous.

We’ll be greeted as liberators.

Please, just don’t destroy Switzerland!

The Occupation would be fantabulous.

Uhhhhhhhh, you DO know that Corsica’s national costume is NOT the corset, right?

Please, just don’t destroy Switzerland!

We can’t. Someone has to make the Tag Heuer watches for the wealthy.

Uhhhhhhhh, you DO know that Corsica’s national costume is NOT the corset, right?

YOU LIE!

I’m thinking Aruba. We still owe them a beat down for that vicious terrorist attack on that girl from Arkansas a few years back. Greta Van Sustren should be able to provide our military with valuable intelligence. (yeah, I know, Van Sustren and intelligence in the same sentence) Aruba is closer to home and puts us on the doorstep of the Venezuels oil fields.

We will never be destroyed. When it comes to real secrets Wikileaks is in the minor leagues.

Uhhhhhhhh, you DO know that Corsica’s national costume is NOT the corset, right?

O RLY?

This just might be a viable target. Can’t be allowing that same sex marriage stuff to spread.

“And Belgium. Fat Belgian bastards…”

THIS. Fucking Belgians.

Apropos of the Swiss; impressive freaking history, especially their military resume. Started the first modern “nation in arms” in the thirteenth century and spent the next two/three hundred years exterminating every army Europe’s rulers could throw at them (until they finally were beaten by the French, of all people, in 1515).

My point is, it’s kind of sad that such hardcore badasses have been reduced to guarding the Pope in uniforms that even color blind me recognizes as an affront to fashion.

From yesterday:

Public opinion has been solidly behind the majority of the Democrats’ position on the expiration and against McConnell and Boehner and the rest of the assholes but the Republicans still filibustered. Whatever you want to say about the Democrats’ “messaging,” it got through and was not the issue. – Lawnguylander

Actually this is precisely why messaging is the issue. How many of those people who support the D position and oppose the R position actually realize that they support the D position and oppose the R position? I know we all have heard even seemingly educated likely voters spouting rhetoric well to the left of anything the Dems actually do and then claiming “the Democrats go too far to the left” and otherwise claiming the Dems support R positions, the GOP supports D positions, etc.

At the very least, even if people do realize they take the Dem side, by the time the next election rolls around, how many of them will remember all the times they supported the Dem side and opposed the GOP side? How many of them will remember which party took which side?

This is why messaging is exactly the issue.

Let’s see…isolated, sparsely populated enclave with exotic place-names, rich in natural resources, ruled by a xenophobic cult with fanatical followers, hostile to the modern world, bent on world domination through propaganda and subversion…

Our next target is obvious

Get out now, Xecky

Our next target is obvious

Your link just sent me to the Google Maps main page.

I assume that was, like, Georgia or Mississippi or something to that effect?

Google maps took me to my town, which, trust me, is too boring and small to bother with. There are lots of brown people here though.

That would be the current Socialist Republic of Vietnam, whose capital is Hanoi? The war where Richard Nixon tried to draft my ass to fight for “peace with honor” and then ignominiously hightailed out of without so much as a “thank you, ma’am,” in 1975 as the Viet Cong and Viet Minh advanced on Saigon?

Damn Goggle links!

Here is our next target

Thread Bear, that girl was from Alabama, not Arkansas. But, there is something I’ve been meaning to ask you: Do you shit in the woods?

Here is our next target

Oh well played!

It’s not unlike Mars, except Mars is eventually made livable…

More like necrocontentions,

Jeebus.

I wouldn’t make it one month in Utah. They gots them fucked up liquor laws.

But, there is something I’ve been meaning to ask you: Do you shit in the woods?

I live in the woods, so naturally I try to do all my shit in the suburbs.

I’m thinking Aruba.

I humbly volunteer to lead the invasion. Also, Curacao and Bonaire, as I speak Papamiento…

Here is our next target

NNNNNNNNNNNNO!

We’d be forced to marry! Over and over!

I had a hard enough time keeping one wife quiet happy…

Hmm, is that napalm I smell this morning?

Not only that but all your wives will dress really really poorly.

I had a hard enough time keeping one wife quiet happy…

The book “Around the World in Eighty Days” has them stopping over in Utah and listening to a furious speech by a Mormon railing against the federal government forcing their definition of marriage down their throats and how polygamy was their God given right, and all that.

Passepartout’s interest is piqued and when the Mormon’s packing up after his speech, he goes up and asks him how many wives he has. “One, sir – and that was enough!”

The feeling is quite mutual.

Wives everywhere said,
December 8, 2010 at 17:07

The feeling is quite mutual.

Shut up, I haven’t slept with ALL of you.

Yet.

Shorter Scott Johnson:

Why would Barack Obama be such a wigger when real blacks are drugfiend criminals anyway?

Christmas music for Evelyn.

The Grand Duchy of Fenwick is just asking for it.

Personally, I think the island of Vanuatu is more deserving…they worship Queen Elizabeth’s husband, fercrissake!

I came. I commented. I killed the thread.

Palau has the best diving, so I have heard.

and also facilitates a potential Israeli military strike: who now would believe the inevitable Arab denunciations afterward?

Oops Evelyn, Iranians aren’t Arabs. Oh, we’ll forget about how the Hezbollah pretty much spanked the IDF in Lebanon. Oh, and the shelling of civlians in Palestine, not so bad.
Sorry Evelyn-wevelyn, Iran is not some relatively lightly armed Arabs in isolated groups. Threatening them with an IDF strike is sure to make them want to drop their nuke program.

Palau has the best diving, so I have heard.

I hear that a lot, also Raja Ampat.

But Palau was among the Coalition of the Bribed Willing, so as an invasionary force, we have to respect that.

For now. They only supplied one troop so our generosity will be equally stingy.

Tags, dammit!

Oh, if it’s diving you’re talking about then I can understand targeting Belgium. Great muff diving there.

For scuba, hmmm, the Seychelles? Important strategic position but not gonna be dry much longer. Belize? Completely helpless at any civic task, unlikely to put up any defense other than crack crazed criminals with cricket bats. Sulawesi? Too muslin. I guess I could go with Palau.

Palau has the best diving, so I have heard.

I certainly enjoying diving into a bed of palau.

& for Christ’s sake, GET THEE TO THE EYEBROW STORE & TRY ON A PAIR.

I snarfled my coffee.

I don’t get people who *want* war. I just…I don’t get it. Especially people who are obviously too inbred to be allowed in the military in the first place.

Especially people who are obviously too inbred to be allowed in the military in the first place.

Tea Party is recruiting tho’.

Especially people who are obviously too inbred to be allowed in the military in the first place.

Well that’s the key, isn’t it? Anyone who might actually have to do the fighting would be far less likely to be in favor of war.

For scuba, hmmm, the Seychelles?

See, this is why I was supporting an invasion of Aruba with the codicil we take Curacao and Bonaire…

I certainly enjoying diving into a bed of palau.

Edith Pilaf is dead.

Edith Pilaf is dead.

Shame. She was quite the dish.

Get out now, Xecky

You’ll need people on the inside to lead the provisional revolutionary govt and accept those pallets of Benjamins, won’t you?

Zombie Edith Pilaf!

Well that’s the key, isn’t it? Anyone who might actually have to do the fighting would be far less likely to be in favor of war.

I guess empathy and logic aren’t exactly wingnuts’ strong traits.

We need to use science, see. You know that Agent Orange stuff? Well, we have to make a new one. Call it Boehner Orange. Then we saturate Belgium with it. Then the Belgians are all orange, not like normal humans, so we can kill ’em all. Plus it’ll be easy, since they will glow in the dark.

a212, I figured the ABCs were your target for precisely that reason. And I fully support that, having gotten wet there myself.

Je regrette de manger votre cerveau – pas!

I’ve said privately to friends and family that the reason people take war so lightly is because most people are so distant from it, so distant from the people who actually do the fighting. People fighting and dying? Those notions are just abstractions to them. It’s easy to view war as apathetically moving chess pieces around when it’s not your son or daughter or husband or wife dying during the battle.

Has Spengler been around? I wanted to let him know I finished “Rise Again”, and loved it!

I wanted to let him know I finished “Rise Again”, and loved it!

The only thing I can find wrong with the book is the title. He should have called his first book simply Rise. Now, what the hell is he going to call the sequel?

OFFS. It’s gotten surreal. Faux Noise is now attacking Obama because he said he will negotiate with terrorists. I’m just… I can’t … I dont even …

Return of the Son of Shut Up and Rise Again?

Rise again again.

Faux Noise is now attacking Obama because he said he will negotiate with terrorists.

When will he ever learn that you just can’t treat those people like rational human beings. No more dammit! No more negotiating with Republicans.

Return of the Son of Shut Up and Rise Again

Ooh, steerpike, that’s good.

Rise again again. Too. Also.

Fixed for S,N! memery.

Zombie Edith Pilaf!

La Non-Vie En Rose o/~

And I fully support that, having gotten wet there myself.

Pre- or post-lionfish invasion?

FYI, I think it’s in extremely poor taste to pair this shorter with Mark David Chapman’s mugshot.

No more dammit! No more negotiating with Republicans.

I’m more and more convinced that invading Belgium…fat Belgian bastards….grrrrrr…hate them!….will have less effect on the world than just taking out Wyoming and Oklahoma.

The only thing I can find wrong with the book is the title. He should have called his first book simply Rise. Now, what the hell is he going to call the sequel?

Post-Erectile Dysfunction.

OT-Wednesday Mango Patrol
You might think that the current tea party is but the second ever to have existed, but then you’d be RONG.

Behold, the history of the Fourth Tea Party.

Could it be that you have heard God’s voice, urging you to reclaim America?

No, that was your doctor saying you really should stick to your meds.

Behold, the history of the Fourth Tea Party.

Srsly? They’re counting Alice In Wonderland?

You might think that the current tea party is but the second ever to have existed, but then you’d be RONG.

Woo.

I thought zero had existed – they’re not a party if all their candidates are listed as Republicans on the ballot.

Srsly? They’re counting Alice In Wonderland?

No, they even left that one out. They are much more creative on which events constitute Tea parties.

I can’t imagine (and won’t try) what horrible experience actor had with Belgians but I look on the bright side: half of them are women. The walloons have all the attractions of French girls without the haughtiness and gold digging. The flemings are as beautiful as the Dutch but they can cook! What’s wrong with this picture?

It’s easy to view war as apathetically moving chess pieces around when it’s not your son or daughter or husband or wife dying during the battle.

Plus having a compliant media that rarely show conflict on the ground with the mayhem and destruction it does to both sides helps depersonalize war. Don’t see much coverage of the carnage our fantastic technology reaps on actual human beings.
“In todays news a wedding party in some Ayrab country was hit by a 500 lb. bomb. Military sources say the brightly dressed bridal party were thought to be Al-kieda in drag. They issued this apology ‘Sorry, our bad.’ Survivors were offered $500.00 and a goat as repatriations.”

I can’t imagine (and won’t try) what horrible experience actor had with Belgians but I look on the bright side: half of them are women.

And those are the hairy ones!

By the way, one might point out to that asshat with Four Tea Parties that King Jeroboam was no great shakes after his Tea Party…

That would be the current Socialist Republic of Vietnam, whose capital is Hanoi?

The shorter is kind of misleading, I think. It’s not so much that the lessons of Vietnam should show us that you win if you don’t negotiate. Her article is all about how you DON’T win if you negotiate, because the swarthy people of the world can’t be trusted, or something.

Or, as somebody up above said, “Just make a desert, and call it victory.”

Actors bad Belgian experience? with a hairy one. One can only speculate (lasciviously).

a212 – pre, many many moons ago. I didn’t even know about it until you asked.

You have to at least respect the Walloons for putting a giant rampant cock on their flag.

Her article is all about how you DON’T win if you negotiate, because the swarthy people of the world can’t be trusted, or something

I thinks a lot of this saber rattling is out of frustration in knowing deep down we really have few other options. I doubt the US public has the stomach for another Grand Crusade.

In the interest of not being on topic… Yesterday, i think ’twas, one or another NPR program had a guy on who compared the US invasion of Iraq with the attack on Pearl Harbor. Both were smashingly successful but in neither case did the attackers have any idea of “what do we do now?”

attack on Pearl Harbor

Those fiendish Huns!

You have to at least respect the Walloons for putting a giant rampant cock on their flag.

The Finns have three in their capital.

The Finns have three in their capital.

Uh, the coq walon is rampant. Standing. Upright. Erect. Much as I admire the way those chieled Finns are handling their tools – gripping the shafts with both hands – they aren’t exactly rampant.

“chiseled”

I just went out to pick up lunch wearing a red coat, pink boots and carrying an orange handbag. This is what happens when my mother let’s me dress myself.

Also, I got bangs cut (too short) and it shows off my gianT cowlick to perfection!

Sorry…that was I who is a disaster area.

It was better when I thought Wives everywhere wrote it.

This is what happens when my mother let’s me dress myself.

She’s a busy lady.

Sorry Evelyn-wevelyn, Iran is not some relatively lightly armed Arabs in isolated groups. Threatening them with an IDF strike is sure to make them want to drop their nuke program.

It’s not just the nukes. The nukes would be a holy grail for national defense, guaranteeing the Iranians that they’ll never be seriously threatened by the U.S. But as with North Korea, there’s already a mini-MAD situation, because they already have the capacity to inflict some serious damage if we attack them.

See that Persian Gulf? The entire northern shore is Iranian; I leave it as an exercise to Evelyn’s alledged intelligence to figure out how much damage they could do to our allies and our oil shipments if they ever decided to flex their muscles.

Well that’s the key, isn’t it? Anyone who might actually have to do the fighting would be far less likely to be in favor of war.

QED, bring back the draft.

“ar. Don’t see much coverage of the carnage our fantastic technology reaps on actual human beings”

Exactly. Even less thought is given to the casualties on the other side.

OFFS. It’s gotten surreal. Faux Noise is now attacking Obama because he said he will negotiate with terrorists. I’m just… I can’t … I dont even …

Oh noes! Say, this is just like when Jimmy Carter sold weapons to the Iranian government after we labeled it a terrorist regime, then used the profits to finance another terrorist group in Central – Wait, that was Reagan?

Well, nobody’s perfect. And Democrats have still done worse. Heck, remember when Barack Obama agreed to help Iraqi insurgents if they turned on al-Qaeda? Hold on – that was Bush? Well, fuck me. But liberals negotiate with terrorists because liberals negotiate with terrorists! It’s true I tell you!

SUCK IT, DKW!!

Yer mom’s Ho Number 1!

“OFFS. It’s gotten surreal. Faux Noise is now attacking Obama because he said he will negotiate with terrorists. I’m just… I can’t … I dont even …”

Oh, fuck me. Those…fuckers.

But liberals negotiate with terrorists because liberals negotiate with terrorists! It’s true I tell you!

Why, we got proof Obama does it JUST YESTERDAY!

The real Karl Radek:

“If Mrs. Ethel Snowden, the erstwhile beautiful pacifist and representative of British workmen, thought she could fascinate us by her pretty manners, it does not follow that we supposed for one minute that this bourgeois goose was competent to understand the revolution of the Russian proletariat. Being ‘gallant,’ we pretended to believe her enthusiasm was sincere when she told us, while watching a military review, that she quite approved of such militarism, since it was to defend the labor commonwealth. But we knew that stern proletarian revolution was not suited for Mrs. Snowden’s delicate nerves, and that on her return to England, she would burst into tears upon the manly breast of Mr. Philip Snowden, who would say to her: ‘Why did you go to that barbarous country? Didn’t I tell you that it’s not the place for British ladies to take a vacation? Better go to Belgium or to Northern France, where you can rest and visit war ruins.’

http://www.marxists.org/history/ussr/government/pravda/1920/10/24.htm

Plus having a compliant media that rarely show conflict on the ground with the mayhem and destruction it does to both sides helps depersonalize war. Don’t see much coverage of the carnage our fantastic technology reaps on actual human beings.

The CNN effect. Yeah, good times. Gulf War I = 24/7 coverage of magnificent smart bombs creating the image of a humane, surgical and discriminating 21st century military, with practically no one mentioning that only 3% of the bombs we dropped in that war were “smart” – the rest was all good old-fashioned Vietnam era bombs.

But, you know, CNN hates our troops and covers them negatively. Yeah. Or something.

SUCK IT, DKW!!

Oh dear, why the hostility? I was just mentioning that your mother has a lot of things to do, especially now that it’s getting close to Christmas time… No wait, let me try that again.

SUCK IT, DKW!!

That’s what she said.

Palau has the best diving, so I have heard. I hear that a lot, also Raja Ampat.

yeah, invade the top scuba sites and Bonaire covers another one,,,where else? Fiji, Maidives, Similan Islands… now those are acts of aggression I would happily volunteer for

In the interest of not being on topic… Yesterday, i think ’twas, one or another NPR program had a guy on who compared the US invasion of Iraq with the attack on Pearl Harbor. Both were smashingly successful but in neither case did the attackers have any idea of “what do we do now?”

I think that’s a shorter for the vast majority of people who start wars. Just off the top of my head,

9/11; al-Qaeda starts a war, and look what it got them.
Gulf War, Iran/Iraq war; started by Iraq, and look what it got them.
Korean War; started by the North, they ended up with the same exact border as before, plus an ass-raping of their entire country.
World War Two; started by Germany and Japan.
World War One; ironically, the only countries that profited from it (U.S. and Japan) were the ones that had no part in starting it.
Franco-Prussian War, started by France. Civil War, started by the South. And so on, and so forth. People who start wars, much more often than not, are just shooting themselves in the foot.

Why, we got proof Obama does it JUST YESTERDAY!

I’m going to guess they were just filling a hole in their programming by making up another conspiracy. One that they’ll never come back to, of course.

Get OFF MAH ANVIL!!

Better go to Belgium or to Northern France, where you can rest and visit war ruins.’

Not to mention the opportunity for a few bottles of Moinette or La Chouffe or other Belgian blondes. And no borscht in sight.

But as with North Korea…

While NK has their big buddies the Chinese to trump most everything, the Iranians are palsy-walsy with the Russians. I think they would step in before something happened to their new little business BFF.

OK, I’ve got 2 US-occupied coutries on my borders, NATO-allied Turkey on another, various ethnic Slavic hotspots to the northwest, Turkic bastards to the Northeast, Pakistan to the east, a shitload of greedy, Persian-hating Arabs right across the Persian Gulf and the Straits, and US-backed Israel threatening to seriously nuke my ass at any minute. I have seen quite clearly how carefully the world treats a country with nukes (cf. North Korea)

Explain to me again why I would NOT want a nuclear weapon?

Having some place to invade and conquer is the best reason ever to let Texas secede.

Explain to me again why I would NOT want a nuclear weapon?

I said the same thing here about a year ago. The corollary, by the way, is that those are objective conditions that won’t go away no matter who’s in charge of Iran. Which means, even if we gave the neocons their wish and funded a Green Revolution coup to turn Iran into a nice capitalist democracy, chances are good they’d still want the bomb.

I am pretty sure we’d enjoy international approval every time.

Actors bad Belgian experience? with a hairy one. One can only speculate (lasciviously).

faaaaar too much information…..

Chris – Not to mention those Iranians have supersonic anti-ship missiles and also could easily wipe out Saudi Arabia’s oil ports and pipelines. Those idiot warmongers who think it would be like going into Wisconsin are totally fucking deluded.

I still remember a few years ago our military had to suspend one of it’s wargames because the commander playing the Iranians had the unmitigated gall to be winning.

Iran said,

Exactly. Which is why every time one of the “experts” says they don’t think Iran is pursuing nuclear weapons I think “either this guy is dumb as a potted plant or he’s lying.”

Chris – Not to mention those Iranians have supersonic anti-ship missiles and also could easily wipe out Saudi Arabia’s oil ports and pipelines. Those idiot warmongers who think it would be like going into Wisconsin are totally fucking deluded.

Right. Supersonic bombers, too, just as soon as they run out of missiles. Not that they really need them with the targets sitting right there on their border.

I still remember a few years ago our military had to suspend one of it’s wargames because the commander playing the Iranians had the unmitigated gall to be winning.

As much military spending as every other country on Earth combined, and this is what we get from it. Oh, happy day.

Iran, a member of the Organization of the Petroleum Exporting Countries (OPEC), ranks among the world’s top three holders of both proven oil and natural gas reserves

Hmmm, neo-cons advocating regime change in an oil rich country. Sounds vaguely familiar.

All ur oil r belong to us!

Texas even has oil…

I think that’s a shorter for the vast majority of people who start wars. Just off the top of my head,

9/11; al-Qaeda starts a war, and look what it got them.
Gulf War, Iran/Iraq war; started by Iraq, and look what it got them.
Korean War; started by the North, they ended up with the same exact border as before, plus an ass-raping of their entire country.
World War Two; started by Germany and Japan.
World War One; ironically, the only countries that profited from it (U.S. and Japan) were the ones that had no part in starting it.
Franco-Prussian War, started by France. Civil War, started by the South. And so on, and so forth. People who start wars, much more often than not, are just shooting themselves in the foot.

I don’t think those are in the same category. When Japan hit Pearl Harbor it was hugely successful. Mission accomplished, so to speak. At the time Japan had maybe 1/5 as much industrial capacity as the US. Bad idea. They didn’t have a plan for what’s next – really, they did not have any solid and realistic plans to prosecute the _rest_ of the war. Similarly in Iraq. Baghdad fell in what, a couple days? But overall, really bad, phenomenally stupid idea. Had anyone with a brain been in charge they they would have expected the quagmire that followed.

WWII – YOU KNOW WHO ELSE and his minions had very long range plans. They very much expected a protacted war.

WWI – It was nearly inevitable to happen in some fashion. Had Willy Kaiser not shot first then France would have done something. Too, the Schlieffen plan expected France’s capitulation in just over a month. The element of early success just isn’t there.

The bit with the 48th parallel doesn’t fit either. The NK’s were only obeying their Chinese masters. Etc.

Much as I admire the way those chiseled Finns are handling their tools

Your mom enjoys mine too.

Also, I got bangs cut (too short) and it shows off my gianT cowlick to perfection!

Did you just call me a cow?

The common denominator in all the wars I listed is people going to war because they overestimated their own abilities. You don’t really worry about “what’s next” when you’re so high on yourself (Japan 1941, U.S.A. 2003) that you think you can handle anything the world throws at you.

WWII – YOU KNOW WHO ELSE and his minions had very long range plans. They very much expected a protacted war.

They also thought they could handle a protracted war against too many enemies at once. Why attack the Soviet Union when you’re not done with Britain yet?

WWI – It was nearly inevitable to happen in some fashion. Had Willy Kaiser not shot first then France would have done something. Too, the Schlieffen plan expected France’s capitulation in just over a month. The element of early success just isn’t there.

Right, but everybody thought it was – on both sides, they thought they, or at least they and their allies together, had what it took to smash the dirt krauts/frogs and be back home for Christmas. Oops and oh shit.

The bit with the 48th parallel doesn’t fit either. The NK’s were only obeying their Chinese masters. Etc.

I didn’t think we knew for sure who – Stalin, Mao or Kim – started the Korean War, but in any case the same situation applies; they seem to have thought they could run the Allies out of South Korea, and lo and behold, they were wrong.

Overconfidence and the belief in victory being certain was almost certainly a big factor in all these wars, and also in why those wars were lost (or at best, a stalemate) by the side that started them.

The NK’s were only obeying their Chinese masters. Etc.

Yup, didn’t want a pro-western government on its border.

“Did you just call me a cow?”

I dunno…have you been licking my hair? Cuz that’s just weird.

Also,

Exactly. Which is why every time one of the “experts” says they don’t think Iran is pursuing nuclear weapons I think “either this guy is dumb as a potted plant or he’s lying.”

I’m not sure it’s completely that black and white. Iran’s probably thought long and hard about the risk and the gain that come from a nuclear program.

Risk; nuclear programs take a bit of time and effort. What if Israel or the U.S. were to catch them with a smoking gun before the program was complete, then go ape-shit and decide to invade or carpet-bomb them? They’ll definitely have taken that into consideration – and with them being such a high-profile enemy, they have to assume that at least one Western intelligence service could learn of the program before it was complete.

Net gain; a nuke does upgrade them from “difficult” to “impossible” target, but it’s not like they don’t have MAD capacities already. Their weapons in the Gulf are the big one, but also important are their ties to terrorist groups in the region (Hamas, Hezbollah, several factions in Iraq and Afghanistan, some on the south side of the Gulf, etc) that they could turn loose in retaliation for an attack.

If I were Iran, I’d consider a nuclear weapon desirable but also very risky. Not saying they don’t have a nuclear program, just not as certain of it as you are.

Just think how much money we’d save not shipping our military over seas?

“OFFS. It’s gotten surreal. Faux Noise is now attacking Obama because he said he will negotiate with terrorists. I’m just… I can’t … I dont even …”

Via Media Matters:

The same reporter, James Rosen, reported that Obama has broken over 500 promises according to Politifact. The actual number is 24.

Rosen is trying extra hard to earn that Christmas bonus this year.

I dunno…have you been licking my hair? Cuz that’s just weird.

Stop using my “hair gel”, Mary.

Just think how much money we’d save not shipping our military over seas?

Uuuh,wanna get with the program? We havta spend our money on troops overseas to protect the oil we spend our money overseas on.
Sheesh!

Ewwwwww! Mom! actor’s being gross again!!

Rosen is trying extra hard to earn that Christmas bonus this year.

Blowing Roger Ailes is more effective and more private.

We havta spend our money on troops overseas

Excellent idea. Chinese troops will work for less.

Chinese troops?

“Red Dawn!”

“Wolvesrlean!”

Excellent idea. Chinese troops will work for less.

I bet we could get Mexico to help at no charge.

several factions in Iraq

I imagine Iran has told al-Sadr to cool his jets and consolidate his power until the Americans leave. Maliki has even made overatures to Iran, most likely keeping in mind the influence they will have when Iraq is on its own.

Overatures, commision, what the hell do I know?

re: Muqtada al-Sadr

That seems to be Joan Cole’s view too, if by “cool his jets” you mean “bury the hatchet in exchange for being the Kingmaker”.

“Overatures, commision, what the hell do I know?”

Pull a Palin and say you’re inventin’ new words, just like Mark Twain!

We havta spend our money on troops

Military Keynesianism is the only kind cons support and you can see why. Without all that money getting trousered by their backers and keeping all them pesky young men out of the unemployment lines their economics wouldn’t look as great as it does, such as it is.

I imagine Iran has told al-Sadr to cool his jets and consolidate his power until the Americans leave. Maliki has even made overatures to Iran, most likely keeping in mind the influence they will have when Iraq is on its own.

I think Sadr is less valuable to them than the larger and better established Shi’a parties, like Dawa (Maliki’s guys) and ISCI. They might have preferred him early on, but as the central government consolidated, the civil war spiraled down (for a time) and Sadr lost power and popularity, they moved onto better prospects.

They can always turn him loose again in the future and then demand concessions from Baghdad in exchange for putting him back on a leash. (Worked for us in Nicaragua).

I didn’t think we knew for sure who – Stalin, Mao or Kim – started the Korean War, but in any case the same situation applies; they seem to have thought they could run the Allies out of South Korea, and lo and behold, they were wrong.

I just read Bright Boys, about the beginnings of Skynet NORAD and SAC and digital computing and the internet, and in it the author quotes Truman in saying that Stalin brought the idea of war to the North Koreans, kind of a whole package deal. Truman remarked it was a stupid idea as the US was rapidly disarming after WWII and would’ve been safely home with its army dismantled in a couple years. Had Stalin waited a few years he would’ve got Asia AND Europe without a shot. Instead, the US just fired up its industries and made weapons for the next 60 years straight.

Seems Korea was a big fuck up for both sides, except the Soviets got the hell outta there.

Rise Again 2: Electric Boogaloo

Funny how fanatical and victory-obsessed those pesky people of the lesser nations get when a giant shows up and starts pushing them around. It’s like they’re not merely trying to make some point to their allies in Europe about what steadfast allies they are, or it’s like they’re not just there to get a lower price on rubber, tin, and offshore oil, or it’s like they’re not just there to have a convenient place from which to wave a pistol in China’s face. Funny how folks get all fanatical about defending their own nation.

Apparently, only we are allowed to yell WOLVERINEZ!!!!1!!!!!11!

Unleash Chaing Kai-Shek!

I dunno…have you been licking my hair? Cuz that’s just weird.

NO JUDGING, no matter how disgustingly depraved these repulsive perverts are.

Hey Pupienus, I’m with you. We need Grand Fenwick to invade — to invade us, I mean — because how else are we going to get rid of our lousy dysfunctional governing class?

You have to at least respect the Walloons for putting a giant rampant cock on their flag.

While the Flemish hang a small one over a fountain.

The common denominator in all the wars I listed is people going to war because they overestimated their own abilities.

Or because they underestimated the cost of a protracted conflict. War costs an incredible amount of money, bodies, souls, however you want to measure it.

WWII – YOU KNOW WHO ELSE and his minions had very long range plans. They very much expected a protacted war.

Actually, they didn’t. They expected to get small, easy victories, which they did for a while. Austria was annexed peacefully. Taking the Sudetenland robbed the Czechs of their defensible frontier with Germany. Hilter bargained with Stalin to carve up Poland. It wasn’t until France folded in six weeks did Corporal Hitler really start to get his Generalissimo on, and he promptly fucked it up completely, attacking (but not subduing) the Brits, who had the resources to last a long time. After his massive gamble in the east failed within sight of Moscow, it was pretty much over, the only question was how long.

The cry of the Cheney fools was, “Regime Change”. They didn’t care about any nation-building, at which Governor Bush had sneered during his Presidential campaign. They just wanted to replace a now-unreliable puppet with a reliable one. That C-Plus Augustus might not have the slightest idea how to do this was the obvious flaw in this master plan.

WIngnuts, of course, care little about this; they really do believe they can make their own reality. Post-invasion Iran (assuming we didn’t both get our asses kicked AND provoke devastation around the oil-rich Gulf) would make current Iraq look simple and manageable.

…though it sees compromise as the ultimate solution to any conflict, its opponents’ aim is often total victory.

Uh. Yeah. When a country invades yours to reinstate the terms of the previous colonial ruler, you go for “total victory” or you totally lose. What constitutes “victory” for U.S. in these wars is yet to be defined. I suspect it’s something that looks like colonial rule and a nation of near slaves with no political power that is called “Democracy” and “freedom.”