I… Buh… Guh… I Mean, My God.

Marie Jon”s buddy Fee Benamon has a new column up about healthcare in America, and it’s really bad. And when I say “bad,” I mean it’s a bloody tragedy. Seriously, this sucker is like the the MacHamlet Lear and Juliet of Renew America columns. I feel like Fee’s columns are Satan’s way of getting back at me after I told him I’d sell my soul for a can of Steel Reserve, and then signed Gavin’s name on the contract.


Healthcare isn’t what it used to be, Part I

Felicia Benamon
July 24, 2006

We all have depended on the advice of our doctors, on nurses, and healthcare providers to keep us in balance, and in health.

I sure hope so. I’d hate to think you were getting medical advice from, say, Pastor Swank.

These days, gross negligence is common in today’s hospitals and in the healthcare industry. People’s lives are in the hands of healthcare providers, so it’s serious that they give people the correct information and correct medical care they need. But that is not always the case.

On a recent Montel Williams show, (Tuesday, July 18th), Montel highlighted “Hospital Horrors.”

Y’see, Fee & friends don’t believe anything that’s printed in The New York Times, WaPo, or any other “MSM” outfit because they “only print liberal lies.” So where do they go to learn the truth? Daytime talk shows, that’s where. I can’t wait to read Fee’s next column detailing the deadly trailer park hoochie epidemic she heard about on a Springer rerun.

His guests included people who have suffered from neglectful hospital care:


-A woman went in to surgery; had a surgical tool left in her body. She complained of pain over a period of 5 yrs. to her doctor who insisted it was nothing. She finally went to a chiropractor after having back pains. The chiropractor did an X-ray and found the tool. She sued the hospital that left in the surgical tool and only received… $250,000 for all her pain and suffering over the years (this happened in the state of California; the caps for medical malpractice is $250,000)! The doctor who left the tool in her body is still practicing medicine.

Shocking. Obviously another reason to limit damages patients can receive from malpractice suits.

Another woman had surgery…afterwards had extreme pain; described stomach of “being on fire” to the nurse. The nurse assured her it’s nothing. But the nurse took a look anyway and freaked out, left to go get the doctor. The woman is told she will need to go back into the operating room. This continued over and over, 5 times over a period of 3 days! What happened? During the initial surgery, the woman contracted a flesh eating disease. The incision she received during this surgery was larger than she was supposed to receive. Her repeated trips to the operating room were important to keep ahead of the flesh eating disease by cutting it out of the woman. If this woman hadn’t of said a thing about the “fiery feeling” in her stomach, she’d be dead.

Yeah, you know, call me heartless if you will, but if you have a flesh eating disease destroying your stomach and you forget to say anything about it, you’re probably better off dead anyway.

These testimonies are frightening! When have some in the medical field become so lackadaisical about patient care? It seems to me that there are way too many in the field that practice medicine only for the money.

Providing shitty care and getting hit with malpractice suits, now that’s where the real dough is!

But I do want to be quick to say that there are many others in the medical field who value every human life that comes through the hospital doors as if they were a family member.

I applaud healthcare providers who put in excessive time, love, and patience to care for their patients…they have a heart of gold.

I dunno if I want my doctor giving me excessive love… that sounds kinda stalker-y.

But there is too much scandal going on in our nation’s healthcare industry. Another shocking story, which came out the same day Montel’s Hospital Horrors show aired, involved 4 patients at a New Orleans area hospital who were given a lethal concoction of drugs during the Hurricane Katrina disaster, by a doctor and 2 nurses. The doctor and nurses have been arrested for second-degree murder.

Those who practice medicine should be in the business of promoting life and well being, and the finest of care they can possibly give. And patients should be able trust that they are in good hands, and not fear that their doctor would consider snuffing out their life during any situation which appears grim.

Snuffing out your patients, I hear there’s good money in that too.

This is such a big issue… a broad issue to cover in just one article. Look for my following piece covering the growing problem of government interference into the area regarding people’s health, unrealistic views on health, and healthcare fraud.

Holy crap, she’s making this a multipart series? Curse you, Satan! Curse you to hell! Where you already are! And stuff! Yeah!

Let’s get the power back into the hands of the average citizen. Knowledge about neglectful incidents on behalf of some in the medical industry should be well publicized. It’s happening all too frequently, and for the medical industry to start to heal, these incidents must be addressed and dealt with.

But not with lawsuits, because that’s the sleazy John Edwards/Trial Lawyer/Demorrrrrrrrat way to dealing with it. The conservative way of solving malpractice? Pistols at dawn, bitches. U know it.


Comments: 40


Thanks, Brad. We needed that.


Fee? You know why they asked you to write a blog on their site? Can you guess? Just a wild guess?

Hint: It rhymes with “conservative traction”.


“If this woman hadn’t of said a thing about the “fiery feelingâ€? in her stomach, she’d be dead.”

Hadn’t of?

“I applaud healthcare providers who put in excessive time”

“Too many OB/GYNs aren’t able to practice their love with women all across this country.”


brooksfoe- that ain’t fair, man. Fee’s actually one of the BETTER writers at Renew America. I know, it’s sad, but true as well.


Wait, so Gavin had a soul to sell?


You drink Steel Reserve? And you have the gall to make fun of libertarians for drinking Code Red? For shame. For shame.


Look for my following piece covering the growing problem of government interference into the area regarding people’s health, unrealistic views on health, and healthcare fraud.

Oh yeah, I definitely want to see a neocon argue against government interference. Think she’ll mention women’s health– abortion/contraception/hpv vaccine- in that piece? I’ve got a 10 that says “hell no”.


I think you’re being too harsh, Brad. Compared to Swank, Grogan, and M’arie-Juan, she’s actually pretty lucid.
Also The Coach. She’s faaar better then The Coach.
Issues with her story, though. It took the lady FIVE YEARS to get a second opinion? FIVE YEARS?! After month two, I’d be going elsewhere.
The flesh eating disease sounds far fetched, but kinda plausable.
If i recall the Katrina story right, they euthanized their patients because they did not have the resources to maintain them for any length of time, and didn’t have any idea when help would arrive. I”m not sure, but I think the patients were elderly and needed serious amounts of care. It’s not quite like the Sweeny Todd picture she’s painting.


Seriously, this sucker is like the the MacHamlet Lear and Juliet of Renew America columns.

Brad, you make this sound like it’s the most outrageous thing you ever read in your life. Am I missing something? Granted, it’s not really deep (“You know something, some doctors aren’t really good at their jobs”), but she doesn’t say anything outlandish.


Look for my following piece covering the growing problem of government interference into the area regarding people’s health, unrealistic views on health, and healthcare fraud.

So, doctors make horrible mistakes on people and get away with it, but the real problem is too much government interference…and that these rotten patients has some weird idea that they should be healthy or something?



The folks at the Tort Reform Headquarters are stopping their check even as we speak.


I’ve got to say, if I’ve come away from Sadly, No! with anything over the years, it’s a newfound taste for Steel Reserve. It’s the only beer I seem to drink any more, dammit. Oh, and laughs. I also come away with laughs.


Wait, she needs a whole column of setup to get to the good stuff of how the government is ruining the bestest healthcare system evah?

That’s bad, even by Renew America standards of pointless columns with agendas not so much hidden, as lost behind the sofa.


Mark S- yeah, I did hype this up to be more than it turned out to be. When I wrote that line, I had only read to the part where she reveals Montell Williams would be her primary source for the article. I assumed that the rest of the piece would be just as dumb, but it wasn’t. At the same time, I didn’t have the heart to change what I thought was a pretty funny line.

So there you have it. Still, she did use Montell Williams as her primary source. That’s pretty damn weak.


True story:

We were drinking Sterno under the bridge when I got this burning feeling in my stomach. When the cops took me to the emergency room, Dr. Punjab said “My friend, the reason your stomach feels like it is on fire is because it is on fire. I will now proceed to extinguish it. Please do not be squirming.”

The point is, if it weren’t for our current health care system, it might have been some corn-fed former Boy Scout from Indiana who worked his way through medical school selling magazines door-to-door that was in the emergency room that fateful day, instead of Dr. Punjab. And he probably would have ordered a few CAT scans, a few MRIs, and a deep cleansing barium enema, and by then I would have been DEAD!

Health care reform will cause the deaths of millions of Americans.

Think about it.



What brand of Sterno did you consume? I prefer Sterno-light. I’m watching my figure. Are you saying the barium enema is a bad idea? Should I avoid corn-fed health care workers and people from the Mid-West? All this thinking hurts.


Your funk Sterno consuming troll brother


Her editor really let her say “hadn’t of”?

Freshly Squeezed Cynic

Can someone please start pointing out to right-wingers that anecdotes are not data?


Editor? What editor?

Brad R. – I don’t doubt she’s one of the better writers there. That’s precisely why I’m sure they only invited her to get some racial balance. She doesn’t seem wingnutty enough, otherwise.


Brad R. – I don’t doubt she’s one of the better writers there. That’s precisely why I’m sure they only invited her to get some racial balance. She doesn’t seem wingnutty enough, otherwise.

She’s crazy enough. This wasn’t one of her better works. Just wait ’til she gets to Part II, where she’ll blame Democrats for trying to limit the amount of damages people can receive in malpractice suits.


Oh…the negligence of that doctor to leave the flesh eating bacteria in her like the other doctor left the scalpel..those docs ought to know they need to remove all the flesh eaters when they are finished operating…

There is just no end to nincompoopery out there..I, for one, am proud and happy you are on the job ..flagging it down as it roars by and parading it before us..


It’s funny. Above the fold, I was trying to guess where she was going with this and where she’d end up. And I was nearly certain that she was gonna claim the tort reform could solve *all* of the medical system’s many flaws. Certain, I tell you! And then she’s all like, “To be continued!” Gaah! Oh, well… perhaps it will show up in part 2. Or even part 3! :::::shudder::::::::

Karatist Preacher

Is the trailer park hootchie epidemic related to the Steel Reserve?


She makes a good case for goverment-run universal health care and against medical malpractice limits. Was that her intent?


Pistols at dawn …

Pistols at dawn? We can say it, I don’t know what it means, but we can say it.

She’s no Marie Jon, but she’s worth watching.


sohei at 15:30: Definately not her intent, but it should have been the logical conclusion of the entire article she wrote. How she managed to turn 180 degrees (I’m thinking a multiple of 180, such as 3240, and thats just her head!) and come up with a conclusion that government regulation of the medical industry is somehow a bad thing, well, thats just the icing on the wingnut cake.

ned fucking flanders

Julia –

Renew America does not have editors. If they did . . . Kay, “Grogan”s columns would never see . . . the “light” of day.

Pistols at dawn? We can say it, I don’t know what it means, but we can say it

My seconds will be out. Call on my thirds instead. If my thirds are out, go directly to my fourths.


If this woman hadn’t of[aiieee!] said a thing about the “fiery feeling� in her stomach, she’d be dead.

Because doctors and nurses never look at wound sites, never monitor temperature and white cell counts, never even ask the patient how she’s feeling expecting full honest answers… And the incision size had nothing to do with this, it was probably caused by the presence of drug-resistant bacteria which are very hard to control even in the most sanitary of settings. Particularly in sanitary settings, in fact. And as the mortality rate is near 100% if the infection is not properly treated, I’m having a hard time seeing a nurse rushing to tell a doctor who intervenes quickly and repeatedly, operating 5 times in 3 days, as “lackadaisical” patient care.


Fee’s big talent appears to be mangling the language just enough to be mangled, but not so much that one will not know what she’s saying. What she’s getting at, however, is still a mystery.

And that bit about the poor victim who didn’t get a Powerball-sized jury payout is certainly an instance of straying from the party line. Between that and the neo-peacenik Swank, the concentrated absurdity of the right may finally be collapsing under its own gravity into a black hole.

They’d still suck, but at least they wouldn’t be able to transmit any more information back to us.


“Hello, we’re conservatives. We’re into the area regarding of being for government that is huge and controls everything, including healthcare. Uh, except not in a filthy like-the-rest-of-the-Western-World free universal healthcare way, obviously.”

Reading that, I felt like the next thing she was going to mention was her uncle in Lagos who has $17 million dollars left over from a coup.

If she earns more money than a single bathroom attendant in the world, I’ll take this as definitive proof that the world is unfair.


Hadn’t of?

Hadn’t of?

Oh dear god have mercy.

So I went to Montel’s web site and it’s clear that the whole show was conceived as an anti-tort reform episode – they even had a malpractice attorney on the ‘panel’ (snicker) to distribute business cards to the audience discuss options for victims of malpractice.

Fee essentially wrote a column using at its source only liberal propaganda. That’s absolutely beautiful.


They’d still suck, but at least they wouldn’t be able to transmit any more information back to us.

Don’t make me laugh so hard. I’ve got a migraine.


Uh-oh, what was that about a “trailer park hootchie epidemic”?

Please, tell me. I might need to get to a clinic

Herr Doktor Bimler

Has anyone heard from Dr. Benway?


What is Steel Reserve?

Gavin's Conscience

After attempting to sell your soul several times, Brad, I gave up and just took out a Visa card in your name. Your credit rating sucks, by the way.

Love, Gavin


What kind of name is “Fee”? What’s her middle name-Belle?
(Yes, I know that’s bad, but I still couldn’t resist.)


Damn, I have to stop going to Renew America. What a nasty rat’s nest of crazy it is.



Please remit.


What kind of name is “Fee�? What’s her middle name-Belle?

Well, a character in Extro (a.k.a. The Computer Connection) is called Fee-5 Grauman’s Chinese. Good enough?


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