Bennett:

if we repeat the strategies we used that worked once before, i.e., in the late 1980s and early 1990s, we can also get the same result.

And if you got your head out of your ass and away from the slot machines long enough, you’d be able to see that the result was abject failure.

..the result was abject failure.

Unless; of course, filling up prisons with poor people was the goal…

The fact is, owlbear 1 is a satanic son of a bitch.

Back when our country was making a serious assault on drug abuse, a show like “Weeds” would never be aired.

He’s right, of course.

Instead, they made whole movies about it, or that featured it, that cost 10-times what a TV show does. Then there were the albums, the music, the stage shows …

Also, too: Since he used to run the agency in charge of stopping drug abuse, doesn’t the fact there is still drug use show that he was an epic failure at the job?

Dude needs a bong hit …

Unless; of course, filling up prisons with poor people was the goal…

BINGO!

Unless; of course, filling up prisons with poor people was the goal…

Well, it did coincide with the rise of the prison/industrial complex (lookin’ at YOU, Wackenhut!), and it does get minorities and poor folks off the voting roles.

The fact is, owlbear 1 is a satanic son of a bitch.

Technically, he is an unholy son of an owl and a bear, but then again, the fact is, you’ve never been that bright.

Unless; of course, filling up prisons with poor people was the goal…
Seriously if filling up prisions was the goal we’d have things like mandatory sentencing laws, harsher punishments for drugs more common among the poor, and for-profit prisons.
Disenfranchising entire segments of the population is just an added bonus of course.

B^4B is fast today.

Tens of thousands of kids are FLYING every year.

Technically, he is an unholy son of an owl and a bear, but then again, the fact is, you’ve never been that bright.

I like to think of him as an abomination!

And embarassingly, still one of my favorite D&D creatures.

Gary, I’m just discussing Republican policies, not actually advocating them.

The fact is, actor 212 is a leftwing communist traitor whom I would love to punch in the face!

The fact is, actor, you name the time and the place and I will gladly tear you a new one.

BITCH!!!

deaths the national media reports on weekly, if not daily).

Don’t fret none, Bill, the local shows have it covered. I’ll bet you didn’t know that!

http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0322.html

You know, a LOT of americans owe their jobs to the prison industrial complex.It pays 4 ways:

1) prison staff
2) prisoners are no longer considered unemployed, and they can’t compete against real (read: white) americans for jobs
3) they are often actually employed at far below minimum wage in jobs that would otherwise have to pay minimum wage.
4) much of the money the states pay private prisons goes into the lobbying industry, which is again mostly full of hardworking (read: white)people.

There really isn’t a downside. Unless you count poor minorities; and honestly, why would you?

But fewer and fewer children are getting the message they need about the dangers and toxicity of illegal drugs, both from our national leaders and our culture. The message the dominant culture in America does send on drug use and abuse is the wrong one.

His answer? A government-funded PSA program in which actors and famous people tell us how we should think.

Gary, I’m just discussing Republican policies, not actually advocating them.

The fact is, that’s what makes you so bad.

The fact is, actor, you name the time and the place and I will gladly tear you a new one.

BITCH!!!

Actor’s got a girlfreind! Actor’s got a girlfreind! K.I.S.S.I.N.G.

But fewer and fewer children are getting the message they need about the dangers and toxicity of illegal drugs, both from our national leaders and our culture.

I find this hilarious- he ignores all the prescription drug problems that have resulted from deregulation. I bet he thinks cox-2 inhibitors are used by the “ex-gay” movement.

And embarassingly, still one of my favorite D&D creatures.

Don’t stab me bro!

I bet he thinks cox-2 inhibitors are used by the “ex-gay” movement.

Heh!

Not only prisons, Bennett and his ilk have made an obscene amount of money off the drug testing industry. Bastards.

The fact is, actor, you name the time and the place and I will gladly tear you a new one.

Uh, actor212 hasn’t even posted on this thread.

Actor’s got a girlfreind! Actor’s got a girlfreind! K.I.S.S.I.N.G.

The safe word is “socialest” (sic).

Don’t stab me bro!

Gonna “magic missile” yer arse!

There’s never a wrong time for a Cheech & Chong reference.

I tried to go for the mangoes and Websense blocked me.

Websense has more sense than I do.

Does Bettin’ Bill actually mention marijuana “overdoses”? ‘Cause that there’s some quality wingnut, uncut and unrolled.

Anti-magic shell! How the fuck does it work?

“The fact is, actor, you name the time and the place and I will gladly tear you a new one.
BITCH!!!”

Are you sure you wouldn’t rather have him ram his legislative package down your throat? I hear that is all the rage today among conservakids such as yourself..

The fact is, actor hasn’t posted this thread because he’s afraid of me and he’s a little bitch.

I’m gonna punch him square in the face, and I’m gonna tie him down while my dog takes a shit on his head.

Does Bettin’ Bill actually mention marijuana “overdoses”? ‘Cause that there’s some quality wingnut, uncut and unrolled.

He’ll probably cite some weird mishap in which some d00d was crushed by a monster bale of cannabis falling on his melon.

Shorter Morality-Cop Bennett: If wayfarers are back in, why not anti-drug hysteria?

Bobby B: “There are more people dying from drug overdose in America than people dying from gun violence.”

Sadly, No!

One might assume that the increase in drug overdose deaths is due to an increased use of street drugs like heroin and cocaine, because we have in the past associated such drugs with overdoses. However, in a paper published in 2006, the CDC drilled down to another level to look at the codes given to the specific drugs recorded on the death certificates through 2004. When these more specific drugs were tabulated, we found that street drugs were not behind the increase.

But fewer and fewer children are getting the message they need about the dangers and toxicity of illegal drugs, both from our national leaders and our culture.

What we need is a new Reefer Madness because that frightened all the kids away from the Mary-Jane (as the hep kids say these days) that shows how terrible it is to become addicted to dangerous drugs because it happens just like in that movie. Reefer Madness was terriffically effective and precluded the need for a War on Drugs, forfeiture laws and crack laws. No college kid ever laughed uproariously while they watched it stoned out of their minds.

…er, so I’m told.

1) prison staff
2) prisoners are no longer considered unemployed, and they can’t compete against real (read: white) americans for jobs
3) they are often actually employed at far below minimum wage in jobs that would otherwise have to pay minimum wage.
4) much of the money the states pay private prisons goes into the lobbying industry, which is again mostly full of hardworking (read: white)people.

MD, you forgot a biggie:

5) For-Profit Prisons are usually located in rural (Republican) districts, and the census counts those inmates as residents for the purposes of apportionment, even though they either can’t vote, don’t vote or don’t vote in those districts.

The fact is, I’m gonna punch DrDick in his big fat flabby gut. That will teach that effete pompous bastard not to speak ill of America and our glorious history and of USA PATRIOT POWER!

Fake Gary is fake

Roooooooooooooooooooooooooolllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll
another one.

When these more specific drugs were tabulated, we found that street drugs were not behind the increase.

They’ve discussed this on several NPR call-in shows, and in every one I’ve heard the first thing mentioned is an increase in the recreational use of prescription drugs. Massachusetts just had a drive for parents to turn in their unused drugs and over 4 tons were received.

Fake Gary is fake

The satanism thing almost sounds like Donalde. Fake Gary is also only picking on LGM commenters as well. But the spelling is better than Donalde’s.

http://www.perrspectives.com/blog/archives/000529.htm
Some musings by America’s greatest senator.

“Asked to name his favorite political irony during his time as a commentator, Franken replied immediately and without hesitation, “Rush being a drug addict, Bennett being a gambling addict, and O’Reilly being a phone sex harasser.” These turnabouts are all the sweeter because “they all talk about traditional values.”

Of Limbaugh, the man who said that drugs addicts “should be put away,” Franken said simply that that the serial abuser of painkillers “should be gone.” Franken then went on to offer a recital of the greatest hits of Bill Bennett, author of The Book of Virtues and problem gambler extraordinaire. Al noted that Bennett, who went through $8 million during his binge, said “I won more than I lost,” a point Bennett said was lost on the public as “casinos don’t like to advertise when you win.” And special venom, of course, was reserved for Fox host and traditional values advocate Bill O’Reilly. “I didn’t know that phone sex was traditional. I didn’t know the phone was around long enough to be traditional. Maybe telegraph sex.”

Gary’s moody today. What’s wrong, bub?

Hey DrDick. Why don’t you step down from your ivory tower and fight me like a man, you weak, soft, fat, effeminate sissy! You love to talk about how America is an evil nation and an oppressor of the “poor” and the “downtrodden.”

You ungrateful pampered coward. I’m gonna pound you in your soft, fat flabby belly you elitist treasonous scum! You name the time in the place. That is if you’re man enough.

They’ve discussed this on several NPR call-in shows, and in every one I’ve heard the first thing mentioned is an increase in the recreational use of prescription drugs. Massachusetts just had a drive for parents to turn in their unused drugs and over 4 tons were received.

Google the documentary “Oxycontin Express”. There’s a whole cottage industry in Florida of storefront “pain clinics” who work exclusively in cash and write for Oxy at the drop of a frickin’ hat.

Plus, was meth included as a “street drug”?

We ignore rise in drug abuse among kids

Can’t even get that right can ya Billy?

Characteristics of Those Dying from Drug Overdoses

The shift in the type of drugs responsible for most overdoses has also changed the demographics of those dying from overdoses. As has historically been the case, men are more likely to be affected than women. However, people in their 40s are more likely than those in their 20s or 30s to die of an overdose. Overdose death rates of whites have passed rates for African Americans in recent years. The highest rates are likely no longer in the inner cities and may well be found in our most rural counties. A map of the United States in 2004 shows an 8-fold variation in overdose death rates among states, with the highest rates concentrating in the more rural Appalachian states, the Southwestern states, and New England.

Figures…

Give ’em hell, Al!

BTW, my favorite D&D monster has always been the beholder.

Hey owlbear1, when I get through with actor212 and DrDickhead, I’m coming for you next! I will go heartland on your ass bitch!

You are an antiAmerica traitor and a spoiled effete little wuss. I will punch you in the face for everyone here in the heartland.

We all hate you.

BTW, my favorite D&D monster has always been the beholder.
No love for the flumph?

Does Gary seem unusually obsessed with buttsex today? Why is that?

Gee Gary, thanks! Coming from you, I can’t tell you how much that means.

No love for the flumph?

Can’t be hatin’ on the flumph.

Flumphs? Fiend Folio Fags!!!

Massachusetts just had a drive for parents to turn in their unused drugs and over 4 tons were received.

Nation-wide (last wknd.?) turn in your ‘scripts drive, sponsored by the DEA. Now that the kidz aren’t ODing on reefer, they have to find another demon, to ensure more funding. Big Gov’t., get out of my life!

Overdose death rates of whites have passed rates for African Americans in recent years.

No wonder why Billy is suddenly trying to re-live the failed War on Drug campaign from the 80s.

WHITES ARE DYING WE MUST DO SOMETHING BLARGARGLE BLART FART BLART!!

Oh, and for Pere, owlbear, et al:

LIGHTNING BOLT! LIGHTNING BOLT! LIGHTNING BOLT! LIGHTNING BOLT! LIGHTNING BOLT! LIGHTNING BOLT!

Massachusetts just had a drive for parents to turn in their unused drugs and over 4 tons were received.

I shudder to think how much of that was unused Antibiotics.

We all hate you.

What you mean “we,” pale-face?

(Voices in his head are one possibility.)

The real problem is all these babies are being born addicted to pot, even via 2nd or 3rd hand smoke, right out of the womb. Why do you think it is that they’re hungry all the time, stare at things for long times and sometimes laugh, and fall asleep after a really short while?

But fewer and fewer children are getting the message they need about the dangers and toxicity of illegal drugs
Best explanation EVAH for why more and more adults are dying from the dangers and toxicity of legal drugs.

A government-funded PSA program in which actors and famous people tell us how we should think.
Hollywood is full of perfect role-models for drug abstinence.
Whom would you rather be lectured by about the evils of drug usage and not needing pharmaceutical assistance? Actors, or glassy-eyed zonked-out Republican stepford wives? Difficult choice.

Does Gary seem unusually obsessed with buttsex today? Why is that?

He’s off his meds.

Flumphs? Fiend Folio Fags!!!

H8ter! I’ll see you in the Caves of Chaos, and I will bring the WRATH OF RUPPERT!!!!

This aggression will not stand, nor will it levitate, nor ooze, nor astrally project.

A government-funded PSA program in which actors and famous people tell us how we should think.

I’m sure Lindsey Lohan will be looking for work.

http://www.imdb.com/video/screenplay/vi2578776345/

I was not aware of this documentary. “Al Franken: God Spoke”
Click link for preview clip. Caution: Contains O’Reilly, Coulter and some guy with a 70’s porn stash.

“Uh, far out, Catherwood, just roll us a bomber and leave it on the side table.”

LIGHTNING BOLT! LIGHTNING BOLT! LIGHTNING BOLT! LIGHTNING BOLT! LIGHTNING BOLT! LIGHTNING BOLT!

MAGIC MISSIIIIILE!

Does Gary seem unusually obsessed with buttsex today? Why is that?

He’s off his meds.

And by meds, I mean his Cocks Too Inhibitors.

some guy with a 70?s porn stash

Medved?

Gary’s off his Medved’s too.

The real problem is all these babies are being born addicted to pot, even via 2nd or 3rd hand smoke, right out of the womb. Why do you think it is that they’re hungry all the time, stare at things for long times and sometimes laugh, and fall asleep after a really short while?

this created a spit-take

…and I will bring the WRATH OF RUPPERT!!!!

THE BUTT-PLUG OF DOOOOOOM?

Monster!

Come on DrDick head. Face me like a man. Not that I ever expected that of a weak, soft, effeminate bitch like yourself.

The fact is, if you’re gonna bad mouth America, expect to have to answer to patriotic citizens for it.

The fact is, I’m gonna beat you senseless and throw you in a dumpster.

Go Heartland!

some guy with a 70s porn stash

Medved?

Or Stossel. May I interest you in a scorecard?

“The real problem is all these babies are being born addicted to pot, even via 2nd or 3rd hand smoke, right out of the womb.”

I’m high right now and dude, I can’t wrap my mind around the concept of third hand smoke. That is fucking deep man.

THE BUTT-PLUG OF DOOOOOOM?

Monster!

Frodo would never have destroyed the ring if this had been placed in the Cracks of Doom.

Poor me. I’m missing out on all the Gary-love.

I can’t wrap my mind around the concept of third hand smoke.

Is it second-hand smoke from another dimension?

Or Stossel. May I interest you in a scorecard?

Before I answer, I’m going to look up “scorecard” on Urban Dictionary.

How come (fake) Gary’s gone all Internet Tough Guy today? As genuine threat it’s FAIL for obvious reasons. As parody (sorry, dude) it’s not funny.

Whoever you are, c’mon out of the closet, in all possible senses. You’ll feel better, trust me.

The fact is, if you’re gonna bad mouth America, expect to have to answer to patriotic citizens for it.

Must be part of some obscure clause somewhere in the Constitution.

He’ll probably cite some weird mishap in which some d00d was crushed by a monster bale of cannabis falling on his melon.

That happened to me, and I was crushed for a little while, but then I remembered I had more melons in the fridge and I cheered up.

Also, islmfaoscist’s link seems to be saying that the rise in drug abuse is mainly in the 40 year old range. I mean, I may act like a kid sometimes but I really don’t fall into that category. Bennet’s article doesn’t mention age, only that there is an increase in drug abuse. The title of the article (in true wingnut fashion) is just there to mislead.

“How’d you get in here, Roccoco? You don’t have a key!”

“No, only half a key! I had to split it with the sound-effects man.”

Frodo would never have destroyed the ring if this had been placed in the Cracks of Doom.

Actually, Frodo didn’t destroy the ring.

The title of the article (in true wingnut fashion) is just there to mislead.

We ignore rise in drug abuse among kids because it isn’t happening.

Actually, Frodo didn’t destroy the ring.

Yeah, technically, the magma did.

I knew Bennett was a stupid hypocrite, but I didn’t realize he was this stupid.

We ignore rise in drug abuse among kids because it isn’t happening.

But if it were, the liberals would ignore it, and this is central to my point.

CATHERWOOD

(older) Well, this is a bit of fun. Isn’t it, Catherwood?

CATHERWOOD

(old) Yes, it certainly is dad. Glad to have someone my own age to talk to after all these years.

CATHERWOOD

(older) Why don’t we sing something?

CATHERWOOD

Well, I’ve forgotten the key.

CATHERWOOD

That’s all right, I’ve got a lid out in the car.

“Before I answer, I’m going to look up “scorecard” on Urban Dictionary.”

I suspect it means ball sack licking but knowing wingnuts they won’t bother with the 30 sec. Google search and just assume it is a homo reference.

Actually, Frodo was going to keep it until Smeagol interfered.

So technically, greed and fear destroyed the ring.

So who’s turn is it to feed Gary to the (rolls dice) uh, 1d3 carrion crawlers?

Also, beauty killed the beast.

I can’t wrap my mind around the concept of third hand smoke.
Shirley you mean “gripping hand”.

Illuminati Repton, when my roomate was playing D&D in college I was busy doing more imprtant tstugff like getting drunk so I have no idea what you are talking about.

“tstugff ” I was drunk when I wrote this so fuck you pendant asshole!

“tstugff ” I was drunk when I wrote this so fuck you pendant asshole!

Don’t get lost in the steam tunnels.

I’m a third level Town Drunkard

Cheech & Chong, Firesign Theatre, AND Niven…

this thread is all over the place!

I gamed with stoners, so it’s all good. My 2nd ed books still smell like a Phish concert.

You’re a true D&D geek when you read the monster books for entertainment.

You’re a true D&D geek when you read the monster books for entertainment.

With just a little bit of colored pencils those illustrations really came alive.

🙂

“Don’t get lost in the steam tunnels.”

That is a great retort B4, What does it mean, ‘ball licking’, ’cause I’m not into that Perhaps you confuse me with Christine O’Donnell? ;/

“I’m a third level Town Drunkard”

I think I have the skills for that. Can i play?

Bettin’ Bill is a 25th Level Epic Moron.

1D6 times a day he can Drain Intellect, but only on himself.

Great Larry Niven and Jerry Pournelle reference Smut Clyde. Kudos!
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Gripping_Hand

I somehow skipped all of 2nd. I think. I might remember THACO, so might have done it at some point.

No worries Owlbear, you were a favorite to sic on parties. When I had a miniature gaming business, I even had owlbears professional sculpted and casted.

Outgeek that, bitches!

To reduce congestion within the steam tunnels, the following roster has been introduced.
Sunday, Tuesday and Thursday: LARP-related activities.
Monday, Wednesday and Friday: Satanism and human sacrifices.
Saturday: Rule of Four re-enactments.

We thank you for your cooperation, and hope that this will avoid repetitions of last Thursday’s unfortunate incident.

Yeah. Consult the dungeon master dice, roll your big book, and let’s get in character.

Black pudding. Hungry. BRB.

To reduce congestion within the steam tunnels, the following roster has been introduced.

There’s a problem with your schedule: no place for drunken and/or mushroom-fueled forays. Please revise and repost.

Thank you Smut.
veiled masturbation reference not applicable in this jurisdiction.

no place for drunken and/or mushroom-fueled forays

The Staff Common-room always works for me.

Thanks about the ‘steam tunnel’ reference. As to Whale Chowders ‘problem’ with his ‘schedule’, to each his own.

Gelatinous cube xing.

Umm, this guy, uh, Ruppert. He is someone’s dependent for tax purposes, is he not?

;/ Is this a mildly perturbed face? With quotes around it, “;/”, it looks like an indifferent dude.

There’s a problem with your schedule: no place for drunken and/or mushroom-fueled forays. Please revise and repost.

Whaddaya mean? They’re all drunken and/or mushroom-fueled forays.

The Staff Common-room always works for me.

Wait, are we back to talking about DKW’s mom again?

D&D, like darts, is a game best played not sober.

When I had a miniature gaming business, I even had owlbears professional sculpted and casted.

That is so hot.

Yeah. Consult the dungeon master dice, roll your big book, and let’s get in character.

Dude, it’s SACRIFICING DAY.

Dude, it’s SACRIFICING DAY.

Combine the two!

Human sacrifice of your most munchkiny player. Then everyone gets real spells, just like in “Dark Dungeons”.

If you’ll sculpt an owlbear, can you really be considered a “professional”?

You’re a true D&D geek when you read the monster books for entertainment.

I would argue you’re a true D&D geek when you read them for any other reason.

I know you’re out there, I can hear you breathing etc.

As there seems to no longer be a T to be off of, and since I just back from a hilarious encounter with a birther AND his friend the 9/11 truther at the dog park, I’ll share.

I was sitting quietly under the pavilion enjoying the hell out it because the sun was shining, Bagoas was knocking himself out playing with some other dogs who were equally as aggressive in their play as he, and I was enjoying (after finally getting around to it) The Blind Assassin. At some point I became aware of two guys discussing all sorts of shit but I paid no attention. Around the time I thought Bagoas would sufficiently tired to take home, I put the book down and scanned the park looking for him. Of course I was then more aware of their conversation and got intrigued by the mention of Obama, “birth certificate” &c.

I turned, laughed and asked him about the birth announcement in the newspaper – was it placed there by time machine or was it due to the nefarious plan nearly 50 years in the making? I’m pretty sure he said “It was a _birth_ announcement, it didn’t say WHERE the birth was!” but I heard “I’ve run rings round you logically!”

I laughed and told him he was an idiot. He replied that his IQ was 165. No, he really said that. I roared and asked what his SAT scores were. More hilarity ensued.

I said something about the certificate to which he replied that he had seen the “supposed certificate of live birth” and that it COULDN’T BE VALID BECAUSE IT HAD SOMETHING BLACKED OUT AND IT SAYS THAT ANY ALTERATION INVALIDATES IT! After a but of back and forth, I accused him of not knowing what constitutes credible evidence. It was then that he ionformed me he was a lawyer who had argued many times before the 9th Circuit Court so that HE knew far more about evidence than I. He asked if I had seen the certificate. To which I replied, when I could control my laughter, “No, but neither have you.” Well that set him off, and he told me about all the times he had seen it at various places on the internet. I again told him that no, he hasn’t seen the certificate. Another round of him listing particular sites blah blah blah. By then Bagoas had come around and as I leashed him, I turned to the genius lawyer and said “How many times have you presented a photograph of a document in court as evidence? You’re a barking loon!” I was still laughing as we exited the park and drove home.

Bagoas and I both had a _very_ good day at the dog park.

We now return you to your regular programming.

Ah yes, another one: BRB, gonna go sculpt the owlbear.

I know you’re out there, I can hear you breathing etc.

We’re in the steam tunnels… bring shrooms and a case of Yuengling.

Pupenius, was it the dean of L&C Law School? He’s a libertarian.

I was enjoying (after finally getting around to it) The Blind Assassin.

and

gonna go sculpt the owlbear.

=

hilarity

When I had a miniature gaming business

With a shrimp buffet, no doubt

Apparently I am the only one here drinking gin.

I can always count on you guys to make me feel less geeky.

Sometimes that’s a good thing, and sometimes it’s a bad thing.

Also, the 9th Circuit Court don’t give a dick about evidence. It’s an appeals court, evidence stuff is for trial court.

Apparently I am the only one here drinking gin.

I have vodka.

Apparently I am the only one here drinking gin.

100-ish proof homemade limoncello (made with jen-yoo-wine firewater).

I have vodka.

I heard that, contra tequila, it makes you put on MORE clothes.

100-ish proof homemade limoncello (made with jen-yoo-wine firewater).

SHARE!

Hmm, well, we are on a short weekend away from home, staying in a great city in a fine hotel. We got an upgrade to a suite with a view from open balconies. Well, last night, a new guest checked into the suite next to us, and dude! He was smoking some incredibly stinky hash all night long – he lit up at 11, at 1, 3, 5 and 7 am. While doing this, he talked on his phone way much TMI, shit about his family and his life, all the time we’re trying to sleep but wanted the window open because the weather was mild and the breeze was nice.

At about 4 am, I woke up to hear the dude going, “Shit! I dropped the fucking lighter off the fucking balcony.” Hope against hope he’d go to bed, but no, he must have found another lighter.

Trying to decide whether to turn the guy in. It’s not so much that I care about him getting high, but motherfucker, it’s a non-smoking room!

I heard that, contra tequila, it makes you put on MORE clothes.

Really?

Hm, I must have some sort of strange body chemistry…

I roared and asked what his SAT scores were. More hilarity ensued.

Did you insist on seeing them in the long-form copy?

I heard that, contra tequila, it makes you put on MORE clothes.

Only if you’re drinking it in Siberia.

I have vodka.

I too, also. And juses.

Of D&D I know nothing. Vodka on the other hand….

I have true Liberal Elitist wine. Malbec.

owlbear1 said,
You’re a true D&D geek when you read the monster books for entertainment.

With just a little bit of colored pencils those illustrations really came alive.

No FAIR!!! You werepeeking!!!

Okay, look, I’m not a fucking genius or anything, but I’m smarter than a Birther, and my IQ isn’t 165.

I think he cheated!

(BTW, anyone who uses their IQ as some sort of argument is most certainly a) lying, and b) a fucktard).

I too, also. And juses.

I had juses. But now I only have juse.

but I’m smarter than a Birther

No offense, but I toss things in the trash that are smarter than a Birther.

Rusty, if that guy was the dean at L&C I thinkk their rep would be far worse. If he is associated with them in any way, It’s probably as the Sacagawea chair of lawyer comedy.

As for the genii walking their dogs in Porty, there is a certain kind of person, and they turn up in all walks of life, that will be obsessed with their IQ’s and SAT scores for the rest of their miserable lives. In the recondite corner of the musical world I inhabit there’s a Nashvegas bass player who finds this an important topic of conversation every farking night. It’s a peculiarly American form of insecurity/self-validation.

No offense, but I toss things in the trash that are smarter than a Birther.

My point. Central to it.

In the recondite corner of the musical world I inhabit there’s a Nashvegas bass player who finds this an important topic of conversation every farking night.

It takes shitloads of brain smarts to play octaves in 4/4.

It takes shitloads of brains not to have to do real playing and still get paid.

It takes shitloads of brain smarts to play octaves in 4/4.

To be fair he is an excellent bass player. It’s one of those things every Tom, Dick and Rusty thinks they can do but it’s not as easy as it looks.

he is an excellent bass player.

For a fin, he’ll do his scales for you.

I can totally do it. I have a Squier Bronco with Batz Maru on it to prove it, too.

You’re a true D&D geek when you read the monster books for entertainment.

I heard that Substance has a copy of the original Klingon edition.

I can always count on you guys to make me feel less geeky.

I can out-geek every man (and woman) jack of you. I was such a dork that not even the D&D kids would play with me.

And FYWP for good measure.

not to have to do real playing and still get paid.

Well that’s all the time we have folks, thank y’all for coming out, it’s time to introduce the band.

And a one, two, um..

I heard that Substance has a copy of the original Klingon edition.

I have Deities and Demigods with the Cthulhu stuff. Copyright violation fiesta!

I have a Squier Bronco with Batz Maru on it to prove it, too.

I know a real nice mid-forties Kay with a Tweety bird but I have yet to see my first Hello Kitty bass. My wife has a fine Hello Kitty Sportsack that we use for international travel. The customs guys see me, dressed and led around by her, carrying the Hello Kitty bag and wave me through every time with a look of infinite pity. It’s a great way to smuggle.

I can totally do it. I have a Squier Bronco with Batz Maru on it to prove it, too.

As a former bass player, I say the Batz Maru bass is plenty good enough.

I have yet to see my first Hello Kitty bass.

Hello Kitty was guitar only last I checked. And I check!

In other news.

CBS is part of the “Islamic Supremacist Agenda” ?

Holy shit!

I guess I must point out that I make a distinction between “bass” and “electric bass guitar” (usually referred to as a ‘popsicle stick’).

I have yet to see my first Hello Kitty bass.
I heard that just one has been made, as a gift for Lemmy.

(BTW, anyone who uses their IQ as some sort of argument is most certainly a) lying, and b) a fucktard).

You can add to that the fact that “IQ” is a useless load of cock. Somebody get back to me when MENSA has contributed something worthwhile to the world.

And when the highest tested IQ in the United States belongs to someone other than a nightclub bouncer.

CBS is part of the “Islamic Supremacist Agenda” ?

A millennial has to ask; were they this boring, predictable and redundant when the enemies were the commies?

I think I’d have liked them best in World War Two. They were strangely quiet during that one.

What about a Sailor Moon trout?

If it says “Pam Gellar” on the label, you can be sure it’s chock-full of 100% pure wholly organic wingnut bullshit.

Edward R. Murrow was CBS. The big difference about WWII might be that the propaganda they aired was at least largely true.

CBS is part of the “Islamic Supremacist Agenda” ?

Why not? President Eisenhower’s brother was a Communist agent, the State Department was riddled with Soviet agents, Soviets tried to poison our minds by inserting mind-controlling fluoride in the water system, and Satanic forces were controlling us via subliminal advertising with pictures of skulls and screaming figures in illustrations of ice and such to go worship Satan.

I held a door open for Bill Bennett once at a reception (I was among the “help.”) . The photo doesn’t do him justice. he’s freakin HUGE. You’d need a truck scale to weigh him. Too much gambling isn’t his only indulgence. (His wife was quite nice to the staff BTW)

As a former bass player

Quitter!

I would not be opposed to hosting Pam Gellar as an expert commentator on Muslim affairs in the US if equal time were given to shit-throwing chimps with diarrhea as a counterpoint.

were they this boring, predictable and redundant when the enemies were the commies?

Pretty much exactly – a lot of the modern screeds are word-for-word with “commie” rubbed out and “muzzie” pencilled in.

I would not be opposed to hosting Pam Gellar as an expert commentator on Muslim affairs in the US if equal time were given to shit-throwing chimps with diarrhea as a counterpoint.

Not exactly a diversity of viewpoints though….

Soviets tried to poison our minds by inserting mind-controlling fluoride in the water system

On my block somebody put up anti-fluoride panic flyers last week. No paranoid right-wing nuttiness ever dies in Utah.

1…2…3…4….just waiting for this tub of lard to die from a coronary.

Quitter!

Newer instruments!

I’ll bite, as it were, what’s a Sailor Moon trout?

I’ll bite, as it were, what’s a Sailor Moon trout?

the worst slash fiction match up EVER. Either that, or the only possible exception to Rule 34….

what’s a Sailor Moon trout?

A tasty alternative to a Hello Kitty bass.

Newer instruments!

Skin flute?

Not exactly a diversity of viewpoints though….

Look, one is a completely out of control wild animal not suited to be trotted out to be in a television studio with strange sounds and bright lights, whose animal instincts could not be restrained and could potentially harm everyone in the vicinity, and the other is a chimpanzee.

Dave? Izzat you, man?

Skin flute?

Old faithful? Doesn’t count.

Doesn’t count.

Not past one, anyway.

Somebody get back to me when MENSA has contributed something worthwhile to the world.

Much hilarity?

SNL is hotter than ever!

Two weeks ago most Americans had never heard of Christine O’Donnell.

Now, she’s the brunt of a vulgar joke on the opening sketch of “Saturday Night Live’s” first show of the new season.

In it, the GOP nominee for Senate from the state of Delaware – played by Kristen Wiig – met with members of the Republican National Committee to decide a campaign strategy.

[…]

As the scene progressed, Wiig actually left in the middle of the meeting to masturbate.

The big difference about WWII might be that the propaganda they aired was at least largely true.

Well, Cold War propaganda had a lot of truth to it too. The parts that were actually aimed at the Soviets, that is. As opposed to the parts that were aimed at Democrats, labor unions, intellectuals, civil rights activists, government employees whose job didn’t require carrying a gun, and elected third world leaders of the Mossadegh variety who just wanted to do right by their people.

Same thing today. These days, you really don’t hear much on right wing outlets about the “Islamic Enemy” in Afghanistan. It’s all about dangerous Sufis in Manhattan and secret Muslims in Hawaii.

As the scene progressed, Wiig actually left in the middle of the meeting to masturbate.

Not surprising, given that France’s weak economy may seriously undercut investments given that rates of fellatio are nearly at zero.

It’s all about dangerous Sufis in Manhattan and secret Muslims in Hawaii.

Can you imagine the danger to people in elevators or owners of delicate figurine shops if the Sufi menace were to spread with their weapons of mass rotation?

As the scene progressed, Wiig actually left in the middle of the meeting to masturbate.

Wait…which Wii attachment was that?

The Wiimote “Actually” enhancer is the greatest thing ever.

Noel of Newsbusters really is a special case, isn’t he? Most of us learn the difference between fantasy, fiction & reality at some point. What can be taking him so long?

Two years ago, SNL and actress Tina Fey were key to destroying the image of Vice Presidential candidate Sarah Palin.

Now it seems they’re willing to do their part to help the Democrats keep control of the Senate.

Color me very unsurprised.

Gee, Noel, maybe if your candidates didn’t open their mouths & clearly demonstrate how out of touch they are w/ the vast majority of Yanks, it wouldn’t be so easy to derail their lame-ass campaigns.

You know else uses that stupid “color me” schtick?” Megan McArdle, that’s who!!

she’s the brunt of a vulgar joke

Yeesh, they can’t even bring themselves to say “butt.”

Or else they only dimly know cliché phrases and parrot them inaccurately.

rates of fellatio are nearly at zero.

Sacre merde, fais-moi le pompier! Vite!

rates of fellatio are nearly at zero.

SucMe Bleu!!!!!

Sacre merde

Hey M. – hot enough for ya?

As the scene progressed, Wiig actually left in the middle of the meeting to masturbate.

Um, yeah. Doesn’t everybody?

she’s the brunt of a vulgar joke

1. The main impact or force, as of an attack

That does make sense, though possibly not the sense intended by the author.

Um, yeah. Doesn’t everybody?

Not live on national TV…UNTIL NOW. Except for Howard Cosell I guess, but he’s long gone.

rates of fellatio are nearly at zero.

French market updates. Better than ours.

Color me very unsurprised.

Color me very unsurprised that Noel is an idiot. I haven’t watched SNL in a long time, but I’d bet good money that they have someone in the cast that has been doing a very good caricature of Barack Obama on a regular basis starting way back when he first became a viable candidate for president.

Doesn’t count.
Not past one, anyway.
Something tells me that no-one would thank me were I to link to images from “splitting” enthusiasts.

Hey M. – hot enough for ya?

Bloody ‘ell!! Just realized how hot it is.

images from “splitting” enthusiasts

I will not take a picture & post it.

I will not take a picture & post it.

I will not take a picture & post it.

I will not take a picture & post it.

(Hideous operation in my early 30s. Must resist urge.)

Noel and Megan should be stranded on an island somewhere – because they ould not likely (FSM forbid!) reproduce.

(Hideous operation in my early 30s. Must resist urge.)

All we’ve had is ankle gore. We need stronger stuff.

WE I tell you!

The fact is, neither DrDickhead nor actor212 have responded to my challenge to fight them in hand to hand combat.

The fact is, they are both scared and pussies as are all liberals. DrDick is a weak, soft effeminite sissy and an ivory tower elitist who loves to badmouth America and Our Great Heros of the past. For this I am going to pound him in his fat belly. He will cry like the fat sissy that he is.

The fact is, actor212 is an annoying communist pain in the ass with a big mouth. For this I am going to knock all of his teeth out.

Go Heartland!

Oy geez is “Roid-Rage Gary” back again? I thought he’s popped a thrombo a couple hours ago.

I kinda like anger Gary. He’s peppy! Needs more similes though.

All we’ve had is ankle gore.

In the heartland, that’s known as anklegore.

In the heartland, that’s known as anklegore.

Anklegore is FAT!!!

I have shiny new healing scars, but not much else. I’m afraid the gory part is out of the way.

It wasn’t even twisted when I was hurt!

The fact is, FuckulentandUnreliable, im gonna break your face you slimy leftwing toad.

You will rue the day you ever crossed the Ruppert!

I’m gonna give you a full nelson. Or as we call it in the heartland, the Tea Party Deathgrip!

Screw you, Gary. I’ll whack you over your empty head w/ this folding STEEL chair, & bounce you off the ring apron like the yo-yo you are.

Pick on someone who’s crazed & violence-prone, pansy!!

I knew there was a wrasslin’ subtext there.

Wrestling is a lot like four Yorkshiremen.

The fact is, FuckulentandUnreliable, im gonna break your face you slimy leftwing toad.

Oh, you like to hit women, Fake Gary?

Figures.

The fact is, M. Bouffant, bring it on coastal elitist bitch!

I’ve got a Tea Party Death grip with your name on it!

Followed by a piledriver, or as it is know around these parts, the Heartland headbreaker.

C’mon up to the rez, Gar. My buds want to hear your ideas – really. You can meet the real FBI (five big Indians).

Oh, you like to hit women, Fake Gary?

I think you’re supposed to threaten to wrap his intestines around a salt-lick and call the cows home.

You know, I live in the heartland, and I’ve never heard these terms…

The fact is, if you really are a woman and not a drag queen. You never know with you coastal elitist libs, then ill have my wife Mrs. Ruppert tear you a new asshole!

She is a former champion alligator wrestler and will mess you up.

Get to Los Angeles, punk-ass chump. Any time, any place, w/in the geographic limits my probation establishes.

She is a former Canadian champion alligator wrestler and will mess you up.

Makes it more believable.

The fact is, I will go Andrew Jackson on your indian friends.

I’ll see your Jackson and raise you a Crazy Horse.

The fact is, you’re on redman. You’ll think you’re living the trail of tears after I get through with you.

Plus one for Team Heartland!

I think you’re supposed to threaten to wrap his intestines around a salt-lick and call the cows home.

I’ve had a screwdriver and a Percoset. Too much effort. I’d rather just denigrate his masculinity until he cries like a little girl.

A conservative actually celebrating genocide? How utterly… unsurprising.

I’d rather just denigrate his masculinity until he cries like a little girl.

Little girls the world over are crying because of who you just compared them to.

Little girls the world over are crying because of who you just compared them to.

Yeah, not fair, really. Little T&U would be pissed.

The fact is, where is DrDick and actor212? If they do not respond to my challenge then they are as I have suspected, both cowards.

This does not reflect well on liberals in general. As DrDick and actor212 represent the leftwing base. Effette elitist “intellectuals” and arrogant communist blowhards.

Not good.

Cry of the Black Birds – Homer Simpson
~

The fact is, DrDick’s belly is about to meet my fist!

Gary Ruppert said,
September 28, 2010 at 4:43

Not good at all, fellow Americans. DrDick, Actor, this guy’s serious. People in this kind of rage can do anything, like call your mom names or even unfriend you on Facebook.

Third hand smoke is when you’re talking to Sharon Osbourne and suddenly you must have nachos.

Anklegore is FAT!!!

Canklegore.

People in this kind of rage can do anything,

The use of litotes is not unknown.

The fact is, I will go Andrew Jackson on your indian friends.

I don’t think we want to know about your sick Midwestern sexual perversions and practices.

You know. We were just robbed. Again.

I would prefer to subsidize, through my taxes, a program where generic recreational drugs were distributed at cost through legal channels. I know it would be damn cheaper than replacing stolen property, repairing doors, and adding more security. If a few addicts cannot calculate the proper dosage when the product is reliably labeled, I am prepared to accept a few drug overdoses as the cost of dealing with morons. I’m also willing to foot the bill for rehab for those who want it.

But I am livid with anger over the stupid drug war crap that only makes it unimaginably profitable to sell illegal drugs.

How goddam stupid are these people?

And how fat do you have to be before you start to wonder if you have an eating disorder? Which means you probably are addicted to certain destructive interactions with food.

“how fat do you have to be before you start to wonder if you have an eating disorder?”

The fact is, you should ask DrDick that question.

Portugal’s recent decriminalization of narcotics has led to lower rates of drug use and fewer cases of severe addiction.

Which is why it’s totally wrong, since we have to maintain this policy in order to help the profits of the prison industry and help DA’s look tougher.

Cry of the Black Birds – Homer Simpson

I am a better person for having watched that.

Holy shit. Gary the little bitch went all internet tough guy. Can 350lb girls actually fight without stopping to eat?

like call your mom names or even unfriend you on Facebook.

Not the nuclear option! OH NOEZ!

The fact is, tsam, after I get through pounding DrDick’s fat belly, I’m gonna come for you.

You will be lying on the floor beaten and bloody you commie pig.

Go Heartland!

I am prepared to accept a few drug overdoses as the cost of dealing with morons.

Just like health care. We already are dealing with this shit. The cost comes down if you tax it for addiction treatment.

Agreed–I’ve had just about enough of this fucking mobster operation they call a drug war, and I’m completely fed up with the puritanical dumbshits that buy into the bullshit and spout on about how bad drugs are while drinking a fucking beer.

El Cid said:
Portugal’s recent decriminalization of narcotics has led to lower rates of drug use and fewer cases of severe addiction.

And even if it hadn’t reduced rates of drug use, it might have reduced the crime associated with the sale of illegal drugs. And thus reduced the criminal’s incentive to get people hooked on illegal drugs. Which could explain the lower rates of drug use. But let’s just ignore facts that don’t fit our world view.

I suppose Bennett is just thinking of future book sales and reimbursement for speaking engagements. Then there’s the bigger picture of prisons for profit and DA’s who are posturing for re-election.

Hahahahaha. Bennett is a tool. Who knew?

The fact is, tsam, after I get through pounding DrDick’s fat belly, I’m gonna come for you.
You will be lying on the floor beaten and bloody you commie pig.

Ok–ready when you are, bitch.

The fact is, I’m not sure how much more obvious I have to be. I could call myself “Mr. Sham” and you’d probably still believe I was real.

The fact is, tsam you are a coward and a leftwing pussy. You would never face me in hand to hand combat. I would crush you fag boy.

I’m a former alligator wrestler along with my wife, which is how we met. You will rue the day you messed with the Ruppert.

Get in my belly!

I HATE TSAM AND ACTOR AND DRDICK SO MUCH! ARGHHH!

The fact is, tsam, you’re toast!

Time to kill you.

HAHA!

Buying luggage and managing to put some shit in it without falling down doesn’t actually qualify as alligator wrestling, chief.

The fact is, tsam, you’re toast!
Time to kill you.

30th and Perry, Spokane, WA.

You make it that far, you got yourself a fight, princess.

Go Heartland!

I’m alright with that. Indeed, yes, please, go. We promise we won’t try and hold you back like we did after Fort Sumter.

You on your way, Gary? I ain’t got all night, bitch.

Go Heartland!
I’m alright with that

Indeed. They should call it Tartland cuz all yer bitches are hoes.

The fact is, oh ill be there. You just wait….Hahahahahaha

Labrador, hell. I think we can safely assume that pretty much anything this clown says is 100% Angus.

Is this “New Gary” (See also: Nixon, “New.”) a sad, last-ditch attempt by someone to get our goats?

I mean, we all know who else wrestled alligators, don’t we?

The fact is, oh ill be there. You just wait….Hahahahahaha

You better bring a lunch and ladder, son.

The fact is, tsam, after I get through pounding DrDick’s fat belly, I’m gonna come for you.

Oh, Jeebus Cripes, you’re getting sicker by the minute! Can you not keep it in your pants for 5 seconds?

The fact is, after I defeat tsam in hand to hand combat I expect DrDick to step up and fight me like a man.

Chris said, September 28, 2010 at 5:47

I’m alright with that.

We can let the whole mess flow into the Gulf of Mexico. (Admittedly not really fair to Mexico.)

The fact is, after I defeat tsam in hand to hand combat I expect DrDick to step up and fight me like a man.

Gary, I’ll be using a 9mm pistol. You’d best check out your TA50 and come prepared for war, son.

The fact is, after I defeat tsam in hand to hand combat

Christine O’Donnell doesn’t think you should be doing that.

The fact is, your 9mm pistol is no match for my glock 32c .357SIG

The fact is, tsam, the mother of all battles is upon you.

Sadly, when Gary posts about wrasslin’ and a huggin’, and getting oily and sweaty with the boyos here, all I hear in my head is Love, Sweet LOOOOOVE!!

amirite?

When guys brag about their big, powerful weapon, it’s only because their true tweezer-friendly pantworm is a bit less than would be useful for cleaning tobacco pipes.

Simply amazing. Take a serious societal problem…

Drug overdoses on the rise. Yes.
Tens of thousands of people dying each year. Yes.

But can you report on it in a fair and honest way: No.
Can you present goals/targets that are most relevant to the problem: No.

First, I love the juxtaposition of youth usage survey results with a claim of 40K deaths annually. The linked report has not one scrap of data about deaths. Furthermore, the 40k number is highly suspect. Maybe a 2010 projection that includes both accidental and intentional overdoses MIGHT generate that number but there doesn’t seem to be any REAL data to support that. I don’t understand what the point of inflating the figures is; half of that number is a serious public health crisis.

As other commenters have pointed out, the increase is almost entirely due to prescription opioid drugs like oxycontin and not so much in younger adults but rather in those over 35. And as per the shorter, why so much discussion regarding marijuana and California’s proposition for legalization of same when none of the deaths are caused by it. (Being in CA I have some trepidation regarding Prop 19 but certainly not because there’s going to be a rash of people dropping dead in the streets).

With such a serious problem, why o why such an unserious analysis and approach? Another shining example of repugs being bad at policy.

Oh and btw, the survey results do have tobacco and alcohol usage as well. Worth noting that tobacco kills ten times the 40K figure annually (Ten 9/11s per month or by another metric, 3-4 jumbo jets crashing every single day with no survivors). Put that in your pipe and smoke it, Bennett.

You know where to find me, Gary. Quit running your fat mouth and get your ass in gear.

First, I love the juxtaposition of youth usage survey results with a claim of 40K deaths annually. The linked report has not one scrap of data about deaths. Furthermore, the 40k number is highly suspect. Maybe a 2010 projection that includes both accidental and intentional overdoses MIGHT generate that number but there doesn’t seem to be any REAL data to support that. I don’t understand what the point of inflating the figures is; half of that number is a serious public health crisis.

Is this data focused on illicit drugs, or is alcohol included with the totals? If you include drunk driving deaths (innocent victims included), that number could be plausible. 40k is suspect, however. Traffic deaths in 2009 were around 30k.

I wish that were the real Gary. I wish he was so angry right now that he throws stuff. Internet tough guys are funniest people in the world.

why o why such an unserious analysis and approach?

whater ya tryin’ ta do, ruin their lifes?

Factual analysis has already proven that the drug war is a useless waste of money and lives.

tsam:

Alcohol-RELATED deaths would push it above 40K but again, the report is a usage survey not deaths. Certainly there are quite a few accidental alcohol overdoses each year but still only in the mid-hundreds at most. The likely accurate figure for accidental drug overdoses is somewhere between 20 and 30k. Not sure adding the intentional overdose fatalities would push it to 40K and when you do that you are adding a bunch of other drugs, e.g., people swallowing a whole bottle of tylenol or prozac.

Worth noting that tobacco kills ten times the 40K figure annually (Ten 9/11s per month or by another metric, 3-4 jumbo jets crashing every single day with no survivors). Put that in your pipe and smoke it, Bennett.

If memory serves, there are two reasons this benighted shit-hole of a nation hasn’t been subjected to a Bill Bennett campaign for the Preznitcy. Besides the obvious resemblance to Fat-Boy Taft, Ol’ Bill is a smoker, & not a half-assed BHO yuppie punk wknd. hippie puffer, but the “Need something to keep me company while I’m gambling away four or five million dollars” kind of addict. And he ain’t givin’ up butts or food, so there!

Where’s that campaign to outlaw tobacco (But it’s legal!!) & it’s multiple monthly 9/11s, Bennett, you obese, mentally ill sack of cancer cells & bullshit?

(Fuck, he must sleep w/ a gun under his pillow ’cause he just knows Michelle Obama’s coming to interrupt his next midnight refrigerator raid.)

Maybe our new, super-duper tough guy Gary is really Bill Bennett and he’s really mad that we’re making fun of him so he has to stamp his little foot and throw insults and threats around to make himself feel better.

Of course, he has to type short paragraphs, because he runs out of breath and has to stop for a minute and wheeze.

tsam, I wouldn’t wait up for ol’ Gar.

your 9mm pistol is no match for my glock 32c .357SIG

I don’t know how to break this to Gary gently, but 9mm and .357 are the SAME THING.

The fact is, DrDick is fat.

gonna go sculpt the owlbear.

ROFL. I need to see if I can roll a crit.

The fact is, your 9mm pistol is no match for my glock 32c .357SIG

So what is up with fake troll? Think it is Dougie still seeking attention? Did his momma keep him lock in his room while she saw clients?

I have Deities and Demigods with the Cthulhu stuff. Copyright violation fiesta!

Nice!!! I can’t remember if I got one of those or not.

I had the opportunity when I was like 16 to buy the early D&D book with hobbits and ents from a used bookstore outside of Frederick, Md. I had no idea at the time what that would have been worth in geek cred.

That is so hot.

Heh, I think I ended all that about 20K in debt… first time it ever seemed worth it 🙂

20K in debt

Still nowhere near Bennett’s gambling losses. Try harder.

I had no idea at the time what that would have been worth in geek cred.

Yessir, when you’re talking half-elf wizards you’re talkin’ credibility.

Dave’s not here, but Bill is.

If you’re gonna be half-elf you might as well be a fighter/magic-user.

Just sayin’…

I mean, we all know who else wrestled alligators, don’t we?

Janet Reno.

Totally OT… you know how the French can make anything sound sexy? Even malapropisms.

Yeah man, I just lo-o-o-o-o-ve how Mad Men is glorifying Don’s alcohol use this season. And Breaking Bad is basically just an infomercial for the glories of meth and heroin. Bill Bennett sure has his ear to the ground for popular culture he does! Whoo!

then ill have my wife Mrs. Ruppert tear you a new asshole!

Didn’t know that it is legal to marry your dog in the red states. Or is de jour legal after you have sex with it?

You’re a true D&D geek when you read the monster books for entertainment.

I only had one brief gay D&D experience when I was about 12, but I’ve always enjoyed reading the rule books, campaigns, etc of various RPGs. No real desire to actually play. Am I weird?

ill have my wife Mrs. Ruppert

That’s what he calls his broke-down old Ford pickup.

Am I weird?

Less weird than Gary. Less than Bankroll Bill too, also.

More weird than, say, Bob the Enzyte guy.

Fuck you, Gary, I got shields for infinity.

So who is spoofing Gary? Come on now.

You know else uses that stupid “color me” schtick?” Megan McArdle, that’s who!!

That’s the only way either of them will get any color.

I was having a really bad day today – then i got a full dose of “Gary Ruppert” and his magic alligators – i have not laughed so much in my life…

I think you’re being too fair to Bill Bennett there. You say he’s large, it’s known he has a gambling problem, now you say he smokes a bunch. Why are you assuming he’s downing big sammiches and sacks of pork rinds?

One thing that goes really well with Vegas and gambling and smoking is lots of drinky drinky.

Yeah, rail about culture and values, Bill. Keep railing, you big butthole.

Oh, and rail about drugs and virtue. That’s what I meant to say. You big butthole, Bill. Let me go check now at the wikip…

Bill Bennett, born 1943, appears to have not served in the armed forces, and to have not served in Vietnam, and to sure have gone to a lot of higher ed during that period. Also, wingnut welfare teat suckler. Bill Bennett has never dug fencepost holes or founded a real bidniss by the sweat of his brow!

wikipee:
“Bennett was born in Brooklyn but later moved to Washington, D.C., where he attended Gonzaga College High School. He graduated from Williams College, where he was a member of The Kappa Alpha Society, and went on to earn a Ph.D. from the University of Texas at Austin in Political Philosophy. He also has a J.D. from Harvard Law School.

From 1976 to 1981 he was the executive director of the National Humanities Center, a private research facility in North Carolina. In 1981 President Ronald Reagan appointed him to head the National Endowment for the Humanities, where he served until Reagan appointed him Secretary of Education in 1985. Reagan originally nominated Mel Bradford to the position, but due Bradford’s pro-Confederate views Bennett was appointed in his place. This event was later marked as the watershed in the divergence between paleoconservatives, who backed Bradford, and neoconservatives, led by Irving Kristol, who supported Bennett. ”

Okay, I checked on NEH, and it’s not a wingnut “think” tank. In fact, it’s positively normal, hell, I think I’ve heard of it 300 times before.

Bennett gives every indication of actually being smart, which makes his stupidity reek of sophistry, so screw you, Bill Bennett.

Hey, isn’t Bill Bennet a former czar? We shouldn’t let commies like him talk!

Bill Bennett has never dug fencepost holes

Au contraire, mon supermarché, it says he earned a Post-hole Digging degree from UT Austin.

How about Hill Giants?

“Hill Giants are immune to all hill-based attacks, even Brown dragon breath….”

Fun is an invisible Rust Monster or scrolls of explosive runes in a city of thieves.

Especially if you have been “smoking” during the game

Bennett gives every indication of actually being smart, which makes his stupidity reek of sophistry, so screw you, Bill Bennett.

This!