The “F” Bomb
The Editorz notes that:
For opining that “Israel is making a strategic mistake by over-reacting to Hezbollah’s provocations,� and for noting that Israel’s interests are not identical to America’s, conservative Gregory Djerejian has been declared an “appeaser� and a member of The [center] Left by renowned political thinker Hugh Hewitt.
For noting that bombing his pro-Israeli Lebanese friend out of his house would appear to be an ineffective way of stopping terrorism, War on Whatever supporter Michael J. Totten is told to stop “bitching� and that he and his friend should “grow up�.
Apostate movement conservative Andrew Sullivan, for the crime of not hating liberals enough, is declared “a dishonest, hyperemotional, narcissistic, self-serving he-bitch.�
I shall now shed, almost but not quite Iron-Eyes Cody style, a single tear for conservatives Djerejian and Sullivan, and the neoconservative Totten.
[sniffle]
It is — how you say? — too sad! Tant pis.
But then when, in their big-tented carnival of jackbooted carnality, conservatives sleep with fascists — there, I’ve said the word — this sort of Valtrex moment is inevitable. When the three purged rightwingers above agreed to make kissy with their favorite Bush, they were basically agreeing to fuck a blow-up doll filled with every diseased, extremist mass-movement notion and belief of the last 40 years.
Which is why my single tear is actually more like one shed by Roald Dahl’s Enormous Crocodile than by the ’70s-era Ad Council’s sad Native American.
The whole “Overton Window” dynamic is about continually mainstreaming the interests of fascism. An effect of this, entirely desired by wingnuts, is that formerly conservative positions are pushed to the center, as reactionary and even ostentatiously fascist positions are legitimized as “merely and defaultly conservative.” First they came for the Eisenhower Republicans. Then they came for the Rockefeller Republicans. Then they came after the “realist” Scowcroft Republicans. It’s a progression nearly complete, and so now it’s time to come after the “Well, wait a minute, I didn’t sign up for this shit” Republicans, as typified by the three formerly useful idiots above.
(Objectively, to ideologically “balance” Limbaugh, Coulter, Hewitt, LGF, Goldstein, Instayokel, etal., you’d have to dig up someone from the WSWS. To ideologically balance George Will, you’d have to get somone like Ted Kennedy. To ideologically balance Max Boot or David Frum you’d have to get Chomsky or Vidal. But no — for wingnuts, the grudgingly-acceptable-in-theory-for-now Left is personified by people like Kevin Drum or George Stephanopolous, while Kos is, for them, an intolerable far-Left zany-person and paranoid conspiracy-theorist, and Al Gore is the return of Vlad Lenin.)
But could the fascists have overextended their reach this time? Maybe so: The smell of incinerated Lebanese civilians in the mornings does make them giddy. It’s true in theory at least that they can move too quickly, can alienate too many of their fellow-travelers. Here’s to hoping that conservatives see their bumpkin-fascist bedmates for what they are.
I can’t possibly be first. This is clearly some clever trick to get my hopes up.
Heres to hoping. And hell yes, use the term fascist. The F word needs to be mainstream if we going to have a chance to beat these motherfuckers.
Reading John Deans new book (its alot better than I imagined) and he calls them authoritarians, which ain’t bad. Either way, its un-American goddamit and these king-loving cowards have to go down. Like Hunter Thompson said “they’re like drug-crazed Hells Angels at a family picnic, these people never leave” so we’ll just have to make them.
You know, as much as I hate to say it, America really needed a good carpet bombing in WWII.
Anyone whos response to, “Hey could you maybe not bomb me?” is “grow up, pussy.” needs some serious perspective. Back-hand style.
I swear to god, a good dose of second banana could clear up our case of raging Hard-On of Infailibitly by God.
At the risk of looking out of it, who the fuck is Hugh Hewitt? Is he an actually important person, or just the same overblown fringe psycho who would’ve been completely ignored and marginalized in a proper civilization?
Cause I’ve never heard of him, and I’m not sure if it’s my fault, or because he’s a nobody with a PR department.
Some Guy: I think the basic problem, and I could be wrong here, is the only people that ever get hit by the rest of the world are the coastlines. Pearl Harbor, South Florida (both with the German U-boats and that whole, y’know, missile stand-off in the 60s), New York City… they got the brunt of the actual reality of a war.
Most of the cobags going “grow up, wussies” are the folks pissing themselves in Bumbleburg, Oklahoma or Midnoplace, Indiana. People that don’t face any risk in their lives except when the mighty Mississippi floods. Situations then that they’ve placed themselves into, and have only themselves and nature to blame.
Valtrex moment. I had to think for a sec, but then I realized that, yes, Retardo done bring his A-game.
Bush: Yo, Blair. How are you doing?
Blair: I’m just…
That is the start of the conversation accidently captured on TV. See the rest here . He doesn’t seem at all bothered by what is happening in the ME. And the conversation clearly shows how little influence Blair has on Bush.
rather than a single insincere tear, I propose the world’s smallest violin, playing just for them;
http://www.cornelschneider.ch/images/Geige03.jpg
Laaaaance!: Dude, that’s awesome!
It will be playing “My Heart Fucking Bleeds for You”…
You certainly didn’t cry like the Walrus, after eating all those oysters. That’s Bush’s job, ‘cept instead of crying he gave the German Chancellor a back rub.
You know, as much as I hate to say it, America really needed a good carpet bombing in WWII.
Anyone whos response to, “Hey could you maybe not bomb me?� is “grow up, pussy.� needs some serious perspective. Back-hand style.
The problem is, we did have a good carpet bombing recently, after a fashion — 9/11 — and instead of having the much-needed “Hmmm, maybe having the shit bombed out of you isn’t so much fun after all” moment of clarity Some Guy recommends, Hewitt, Goldstein, and the rest of their fellow ass gophers took that as an opportunity to have a total psychotic break. Now, rather than any kind of empathy with the rest of humanity, their worldview centers primarily around a uniquely bat-shit belief that anyone who dissents with a foreign policy centered entirely around “bomb the hell out of ’em” is a limp-wristed commie Islamsymp appeaser.
In short, they went around the bend long ago, so long ago that it’s getting harder and harder to believe that they were ever worth saving. Hoping for these people to gain some perspective is like hoping for Terrell Owens to learn some humility — it’s a nice thought, but it ain’t never gonna happen.
Hey, Patkin!
I’m from Midnoplace, Indiana, and I resent your remark. (Even though it is totally fucking true.)
I have to go memorize some made-up NRA statistics to annoy my liberal friends with. (And I also have to remember to keep ignoring the fact that they all own guns and hate the NRA anyway.)
“Objectively, to ideologically “balanceâ€? Limbaugh, Coulter, Hewitt, LGF, Goldstein, Instayokel, etal., you’d have to dig up someone from the WSWS. To ideologically balance George Will, you’d have to get somone like Ted Kennedy. To ideologically balance Max Boot or David Frum you’d have to get Chomsky or Vidal.”
With this caveat that neither of them will be as sheer loony as their wingnut counterparts.
Well Totten seems genuinely shaken, I just can’t see how. After years of projecting all kinds of hostility on the Liberal Left (which, of course, left him), he’s finally experienced the ol’ mirror moment. Part of me wants to say, hey, bitch guy, come back. We haven’t really changed, we just didn’t have an epoch of insanity like you did.
But then, I snap back. Wait, I say, we don’t want you back! You and your fucking stupid ideas about power, might and war forming a series of peacable democracies (with American ideals no less). It’s insane. Literally insane. As batshit an idea as alchemy.
But if it were only a misplaced idealism, that would be one thing, but you went out of your fucking way, douchebag, to slag those of us who had the temerity to point out the lunacy of the adventure. For pointing out the obvious. Something a child could see. The Right, we said ad nauseum, they’re being frivolous with people’s lives, American soldiers, Iraqis, hell, everyone’s. We screamed that trusting Bush and his minions was more than a fool’s game, it was plainly wrongheaded. They’re fighting the wrong war! These people didn’t attack us or even harbor those that did. They’re going to fuck up two wars and destablize a region that needs to be as stable as possible. Just because they SAID the adults were in charge, didn’t mean it was true. Rube.
I just don’t feel like being generous to these people. They got the war they wanted. They got all the power they could handle. In short, they had the optimal conditions for their entire checklist — and it was STILL obvious they were going to blow it, because there was never, ever a chance at success. What’s worse is that they did EVEN WORSE than the lowest bar one could possibly set, mainstreaming torture, failure, lawlessness, fucking up Iraq, Afghanistan and the U.S. while creating the conditions that gave rise to a belligerent Iran, Hamas and now Hezbollah.
Totten sat there wailing about the righteousness of the adventure, dismissed the obvious cruelties and only now sees the creatures with whom he threw in with, hateful fascists who can’t conceive of the world the way Totten did, and care to know nothing of it. It would be a bit sad and poignant if he wasn’t such an insufferable asshole.
Doug, no, 9/11 wasn’t a carpet bombing. As horrific as it was, it was only a taste of war. No living American has, on his own soil, been a refugee, or seen the true horror of war happening on his home turf. Like Some Guy, I think this is a major reason for the sheer callousness of a lot of wingers.
Let them spend a couple of years wandering, not knowing a safe place, not knowing whether their brothers are dead, their sisters raped, where their next meal will come from. Then “Bring it on” will be as ashes in their mouths.
With this caveat that neither of them will be as sheer loony as their wingnut counterparts.
Or rather, that both Chomsky and Vidal would be vastly smarter than their wingnut counterparts. Not sure they’re not “loony”; but I have an affection for loons.
With this caveat that neither of them will be as sheer loony as their wingnut counterparts.
Yeah. I meant the comparisons strictly according to ideological position, not temprament or intelligence.
Just FYI, Iron Eyes Cody wasn’t really a Native American, though he played one on television. He was the son of Italian immigrants to Louisiana, went to Hollywood in the 20s and started playing “Indian” parts in silent films, and eventually took a NA-sounding stage name.
Not really on-topic, I know, but I thought it was interesting.
…Iron Eyes Cody wasn’t really a Native American.
I think you just broke my irony meter.
I just don’t feel like being generous to these people. They got the war they wanted. They got all the power they could handle. In short, they had the optimal conditions for their entire checklist — and it was STILL obvious they were going to blow it, because there was never, ever a chance at success. What’s worse is that they did EVEN WORSE than the lowest bar one could possibly set, mainstreaming torture, failure, lawlessness, fucking up Iraq, Afghanistan and the U.S. while creating the conditions that gave rise to a belligerent Iran, Hamas and now Hezbollah.
Damn, Jay B, you said it just right. Bravo!!
mikey
“No living American has, on his own soil, been a refugee, or seen the true horror of war happening on his home turf. ”
Oddly, New Orleans was the closest thing, and that didn’t make a big enough impression, because it was mainly poor people of color. Poor, dark-skinned refugees just don’t exert a big emotional tug in the US, whether they are from New Orleans or Beirut.
Doug: The problem is, we did have a good carpet bombing recently, after a fashion…
Rob G.: As horrific as it was, it was only a taste of war…
Exactly. Well, almost. Around 0.001% of the population died in less than an hour on a single day. Period. Full stop. No continuation. No repetition. No attrition. No wearying slow bleeding. No widespread privation. No casualties on every block, or even in every town. No extended disruption, let alone alteration, of our “way of life”. No loss of territory, not an inch. No obliterated infrastructure or ruins or craters outside of three relatively small geographic areas. And now not even that to remind us. Nothing after that one sudden flash of pain.
11/09/01 wasn’t so much a taste of war as it was a man-made disaster.
In high school, my German teacher told us a story of how she was in Berlin in 1947 when she met some old guy sitting on a bench who said to her, “Ya know, it’s boring around here! Ya know what? It’s time we had another war to clear the air. Ya know? Another war, yeah that’s right.”
They were surrounded by ruins. Moral of the story: some people — many more than you realise — are basically incurables. Don’t assume they will get tired of it all in time to save the world from destruction.
Jade,
War is a Force That Gives Us Meaning is one thing, but War is a Force That Gives Us Meaning By Pretending to Be Tough Guys While, Ducking the Fighting and Mocking the People Dying IN the War is quite another.
One is a Warrior ethic that, while sad, is understandable to anyone with an addiction to the visceral thrill of challenging mortality and/or playing God. The other is what you get from living in Ma’s basement too long.
One vague, still ma-tooring thought:
Hewitt, Limbaugh, Jonah Goldberg–these are their defenders and champions and theorists, because these are the only ones they have left. Francis Fukayama? Left no forwarding address. What’shisname Pollack? Straightening his tie and studiously looking the other way. Oh but look, here comes John “Li’l Pod” Podhoretz.
Six years of abject failure and plain-as-day corruption will do that to a “movement”–scare off, rinse away, or gross out the well-meaning sane people and intelligent, reasonable humans who all gathered around at the beginning. The more we go on toward 08, the more the authoritarian/fascist/etc. clique will feature ONLY the Marat/Sade cast of drooling psychos and pampered aristos manque.
As batshit an idea as alchemy. This is a brilliant analogy. Some of them may even know enough to recognize it.
And well done, Retardo. We need to keep hitting them with the f-bomb. Because it is the truth.
War is a Force That Gives Us Meaning is one thing, but War is a Force That Gives Us Meaning By Pretending to Be Tough Guys While, Ducking the Fighting and Mocking the People Dying IN the War is quite another.
I know. I’m gonna get all redundant and pedantic and shit. War is waste, horror, brutality and pain. War is walking down a road with BODIES lying in the ditch. Fucking Bodies. With flies buzzing around. And the bowell-loosening sound of a Czech LMG or a twelve-seven just meters away. War is sitting up all night in a night ambush, waiting in the fucking rain for somebody to kill. War is six year old girls offering sex for money ’cause they don’t have anything to eat. War is watching the new kid die ’cause he didn’t even know not to pick cool shit up in the field. War is the “zip-zip-zip-SPLAT” sound of AK fire hitting the guy behind you. War is getting stupid stoned and watching a firefight a few klicks down the valley from the safety of a firebase. Green and red tracers, 82mike mike flares, radio calls for medevac. War is the hollow eyes of a kid with no legs on a stretcher, waiting for dustoff, knowing he’s really hurt bad, afraid he’s gonna die and just as afraid he’s gonna live.
Don’t fucking give me ‘warrior ethic’. It’s all criminal. They profit, we die. Oh, sure, there’s a rush when the last burst of incoming is an echo, and you check and you don’t have any holes in you, and you wander around the field, looking for someone to talk to, hoping you don’t have to talk. Fuck you. War is not something to be played for fun…
mikey
COMPLETELY OT, this is for Retardo. We are planning a memphis Blogger’s Bash, for more info, go here!
http://rocknrollplanet.blogspot.com/2006/07/survey-says.html#links