Can You Get Any Crazier Than Renew
America?

It’s debatable. For the better part of this decade, Renew America has provided us with a remarkable cast of right-wing rogues who employ their third-grade writing skills to lambaste the evils of feminism, the liberal press, the entire religion of Islam, abortion, and the price of milk. And not only do Renew America’s writers sound crazy, but they look the part as well:

RenewAmericaPanoply1.jpg

However, Renew America’s status as The Craziest of All Crazy Right-Wing Crazy Sites on the Internets is in severe jeopardy. An upstart nutter site calling itself The Christian Worldview Netowrk has burst onto the scene with the biggest stable of high-quality wingnuts seen since wingnuttery was invented by Sir Swithen Wingnut in 1643. To give you a taste of just how gobshite cuckoo the CWN is, I present you with this column called “UFOs and the Gospel of Christ” by Ralph C. Barker:

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UFOs and the Gospel of Christ (Part 1 of 2)

I saw my first UFO in the mid-1950s when I was about ten years old.

We’re literally one sentence in, and he’s already talking about seeing UFOs. This is gonna be comedy gold.

My family lived in Atlanta, Georgia, and it really was not that unusual to spot a UFO or two in those days. For the younger readers, this was a time when satellites were a new fascination for Americans. The Russians had launched �Sputnik� and the U.S. had “Echo� and other satellites in orbit.

In our daily paper, the Atlanta Journal and Constitution, were published the times that various satellites would pass over Atlanta. Many eyes were focused on the night skies and some, me included, saw things other than satellites. We saw UFOs.

“Sure, we learned years later that the CIA had been spiking our water supply with LSD, but darn it, I still think them UFOs were nifty!”

UFOs, unidentified flying objects, by definition are not necessarily extraterrestrial spaceships. Rather, they are something that can’t be readily identified thus “unidentified� flying objects.

Additionally, unidentified flying objects are often see moving through the air far above our heads, hence the “flying” in unidentified flying objects. I hope this definition helps.

Most UFOs are usually eventually identified. Most turn out to be something natural or man-made. A very small number of sightings are never explained. These residual unidentified flying objects, or RUFOs, are the ones that keep people talking and interested. It is these that keep Art Bell and others up late at night.

Yep, he just name-checked Art Bell. We’re going way off the deep end, folks, and it’s doubtful we’ll ever find our way back.

To this day I don’t know what my childhood UFOs were. The only thing I do know is that the objects I saw violated every known law of physics.

He makes it sound so dirty, doesn’t he? “The UFOs completely sodomized the second law of thermodynamics, I tells ya!”

Gavin adds: Every known law of physics, like Pauli’s fermion exclusion principle and everything? Or did Ralph C. Barker violate every known law of not mixing peach schnapps, Mickey’s largemouths, huffs from a bag of Testors airplane glue, and bong hits? Parsimony can be a questioner’s best ally.

They flew at very high altitudes and performed almost instant, high speed, ninety-degree turns. Nothing flying, then or now, with the exception of Superman, can do this.

Does anyone have the heart to tell him that Superman isn’t real either? Though on second thought, let him have his fun little fantasy- the poor bastard’s still traumatized from learning the truth about the Easter Bunny last year.

The modern UFO craze began in 1947 with the famous “Roswell Incident.� It was reported by witnesses that a UFO had crashed in Roswell, New Mexico, and that the United States Government had recovered the bodies of alien visitors. Allegedly, the bodies were taken to what today is known as Area 51. Many believe that they are still there.

My purpose today, however, is not to stir up our fascination with UFOs but rather to expose how New Agers are using our fascination to further their false gospel.

*eyes blink*

WHAT???

Many have not made the connection but I assure you that a very strong, obvious, and evil connection does exist between UFOs and the Gospel of Jesus Christ.

Whenever somebody starts a sentence with phrases like “many have not made the connection,” or “whatever the facts may be,” or “I have no evidence,” there’s a 99.99999999999999999999999% chance that whatever follows is going to be either stupid or insane or a combination of the two that I call “instupid.” Ralph thankfully doesn’t prove himself to be the exception to this rule.

There exists throughout the world various “gifted� people who supposedly can contact aliens and channel their messages to us earthlings.

cleo6.jpg
“I can put ya in touch wit Klingons, Vulcans and even da Romulans, chile! Call me now!”

This certainly is interesting to consider but here is the really intriguing point. These messages routinely attack, ridicule, or undermine Christianity. The aliens don’t seem to be threatened by Islam, Buddhism, Hinduism, or any other ism. They focus their attacks on Christianity. Could this be because Christianity is the only true religion? This would be my bet.

Could it be that Ralph’s been huffing Kaye Grogan-brand Rubber Cement? That would be my bet.

Gavin adds: Parsimony can be a questioner’s best ally.

There is a book, The Fellowship: Spiritual Contact Between Humans and Outer Space Beings, by Brad Steiger. In the book Steiger presents alleged conversations between aliens and human channelers. The back cover of his book says:

Meet some of those who have known, loved, and learned from extra dimensional beings, either through “channeling� or by physical contact—people who may be our era’s most urgent prophets. Here is a groundbreaking, in-depth exploration of the increasing number of interactions now taking place between human beings and spirits from other dimensions, spirits who bear a hope-filled message of love and transformation.

Apparently, aliens know a lot about love. They want to share it with us. But, it is not the love of Christ they share.

Instead it’s the love of… uh… Satan?

In William Alnor’s book, UFOs in the New Age, he gives us more insight into the false gospel propagated by many UFOlogists.[6]

The basic message from the aliens is that earthlings are invited to join them in progressing to the next level of evolution. Can you hear “Age of Aquarius� playing in the background?

What is particularly interesting about this invitation is who is not welcome to join them. The unwelcome are the practicing Jews and Christians. Listen to this quote that subtly applies to them. This message comes from space being OX-HO who speaks to those associated with a British Columbian UFO contact group.

OX-HO? There’s a goddamn space alien named OX-HO? What the fuck is his wife named, “BISON-SKANK?”

OX-HO says:

“People of earth, you are becoming fourth dimensional (meaning that humanity is evolving into a new species) whether you are ready or not. Leave the old to those who cling to the old. Don’t let the New Age leave you behind.”

The more you read the book the clearer it becomes that “the old� referred to by OX-HO is outdated religious beliefs like Christianity and all that right/wrong stuff.


He also invited us to have an orgy with him and BISON-SKANK on their spaceship COW-SLUT.

Now the question is who inhabits the UFOs. Are they aliens? Are they extra terrestrials? Are they from our future? Who or what are they? Enquiring minds want to know. In Part II, we will answer these questions. Until then Klaatu, Barada, Nikto!

There’s nothing I can really add to that. Besides, I promised OX-HO that I’d give him a call so we could further plot the destruction of Christianity. Toodles!

 

Comments: 86

 
 
 

It doesn’t seem to be enough that us godless liberas are waging war against Christmas. Now our new allies, OX-HO and his armies of space aliens wish to undermine the one true religion. Can’t… stop… laughing…

 
 

Those silly liberals, smoking their “reefer”, holding “love-ins”, dancing around listening to “Age of Aquarius” all the damned day.

 
 

They used to talk about this on “This Week in Biblical Prophecy.” In fact, Rexella and Hubby used to hawk a video in which it was explained that UFO sightings were due to the cosmic battle being fought between Christ and his angels and the devil and his flying space cohort.

 
 

The more you read the book the clearer it becomes that “the old� referred to by OX-HO is outdated religious beliefs like Christianity and all that right/wrong stuff.

Uh, outdated religious beliefs would include Islam, Buddhism, Hinduism, etc. So where’s the evidence that it is targeting Christianity explicitly?

Still, I’m happy to have space aliens on our side. We’re really going to kick Xtian butt with OX-HO leading the armies of darkness.

 
 

Dude, you’ve got to check out his column on how the mafia’s dedication to capital punishment should be a model for Christians to follow.

 
 

I thought a basic tenet of cristianity was that the Universe was put there for humans alone. “Made in his image” and all that. That’s why the father sent the son down as a human to fix the apple eating incident. Has Jesus been sent to countless worlds to fix their original sins?

 
 

Dude, you’ve got to check out his column on how the mafia’s dedication to capital punishment should be a model for Christians to follow.

I can only take so much of him at a time. That sounds like a project for tomorrow, though.

 
 

I spell like a friggin illiterate! Christianity

 
 

I still remember when YAK-TRAMP voyaged down from the great beyond and counseled me to reject Jesus Christ’s love in favor of healing crystals, homeopathic remedies, and the unearthly wisdom of Deepak Chopra. Where are you now YAK-TRAMP? I miss you so!

 
 

Well if Marie Jon ever wants a place to park her apostrophe, Renew America would be the place.

Of course, she can park her sexually repressed apostrophe at my place anytime!

 
 

MOUFLON-TROLLOP once sold me some patchouli oil.

 
 

“UFOs, unidentified flying objects, by definition are not necessarily extraterrestrial spaceships. Rather, they are something that can’t be readily identified thus “unidentifiedâ€? flying objects.”

This is why they call him The Describer.

” These residual unidentified flying objects, or RUFOs, are the ones that keep people talking and interested. ”

I knew a Rufo at school. I don’t think he was an alien, though.

 
 

“Klaatu… verada… necktie!”

Deadite wingnuts attack!

Great catch, by the way.

 
 

Uh, I know this is going to make me sound like a freak, but the guy can’t even get his nutjobbery right. The modern UFO era began when Kenneth Arnold, a pilot, announced he spotted nine half-moon-shaped UFOs over Mt Rainier in Washinton State. (He described them as moving like saucers skipping over the water, which is where the whole flying saucer thing comes from.) This was in 1947, a couple of weeks before Roswell, and a month or so before Maury Island, also in Washington State, which is the first recorded Men In Black incident, and in which Arnold was also vaguely involved.

Guys like this give crackpots a bad name. If you’re going to believe this bullshit, at least get it right. Or just turn your column over to Prophet Yahweh.

 
 

Can you hear “Age of Aquarius� playing in the background?

You can’t? I can!

Of course it’s being sung by my neighbor’s dog, Pooch-Ho.

(At the mention of the name “Pooch-Ho” Rick Santorum just got wood.)

 
 

[…] And Brad from Sadly, No (Bradley, No?) has the proof. […]

 
 

Those were the days, careening around the Georgia skies with ELK-STRUMPET. We had a much phatter physics-violating primer-red hot-saucer than WILDEBEEST-BIMBO, despite his blingin’ rims.

If we’d only known then just what dullards milled about below us, Earth would already have been ours. Damn the cautious ones! At least our agents tell us there’s plenty of time left yet to show up that shop-class superstar J.C. and pre-empt his silly little Armageddon.

Wait, you mean this isn’t OX-HO.blogspot.com? Abort, abort!

 
 

I dunno, isn’t this barking up the wrong tree? I believe S,N!’s Mission Statement goes something like, “We shall mock any and all right-wingers, with a special concentration in obscure and far-right persons.” But shouldn’t there be an exception for UFO types? I mean, Jeff Goldstein, Kaye Grogan, Mari’e…Jon, et. al. are all fine, but shouldn’t the winger have to pass some sort of rudimentary test, such as not believing in aliens? I demand Standards & Practices look at this!

Although the whole “transhuman” thing is a bit out there too, even for them, so…maybe I’m wrong here.

 
 

Don’t blame me, I voted for OX-HO.

This guy is like Gene Ray‘s evil twin. Oddly enough, I think that both of their worldviews would be perfectly fine with that possibility.

 
 

It has everything..10 year olds that know all the laws of physics, a series of quotes without any verification, the presumption (mind you it was never stated explicitly) that that aliens have an anti-Christian agenda (ergo, all space aliens are Democrats) above all other agendas, and, connected to that, the implicit observation that these aliens, who speed through the galaxy unimpeded, who disobey the laws of physics, who are so new age have somehow become so stupid as to not know Jesus. And I though Jesus got around, but then again, how’s some middle eastern fanatic born to..a ..mutant..virgin..oh my..Mary was an alien..they have used the virgin birth to keep Earth in the intellectual stone age..Jesus was a vehicle…

It’s working.

Oh my.

 
 

Truly an inspirational site…
Led me to this video and now my booty drops like the Walls of Jericho. This one would have been a good early volley in your YouTube wars.

 
 

Gee, thanks for that evil link. I just wasted 25 minutes of my fucking life clicking through their list of contributors and counting the porn ‘staches.

 
 

This guy is like Gene Ray’s evil twin. Oddly enough, I think that both of their worldviews would be perfectly fine with that possibility.

Damn, you beat me to it. Perhaps they are the same person, but in a different singularity. As Dr. Ray has definitively proven, there are four days within a single day. It’s kind of hard to explain– let’s check out timecube.com and see what Dr. Ray has to say today:

“Creation occurs via opposites. Singularity is the death math of religious/academic Godism. Earth Opposites should split apart – and cascade molten lava upon God worshippers, for they are the evil on Earth.”

Hmm, maybe they’re not the same guy after all… Actually, I’m kind of with Dr. Ray on this one. You know, the part about the molten lava and all.

 
 

Somebody should tell this Ralph C. Barker cat about Scientology and Xenu. I wonder if Xenu and OX-HO know each other.

 
 

Most UFOs are usually eventually identified.

Most… usually… eventually… D00d, kling to some certainty for Klaatu’s sake!

Most turn out to be something natural or man-made.

Most turn out to be seen at night, or sometimes during the day. They are always silent or have some eerie sound. When they don’t kidnap me or my best cow Bossie for anal and udder probing, they leave no message.

Mmm… sweater vest…

 
 

These residual unidentified flying objects, or RUFOs, are the ones that keep people talking and interested.

Uh, dood? Not RUFOs. Roofies. You know, Rohypnol? Probably OX-HO slipped you some when you tried not to pay it…

mikey

 
 

They flew at very high altitudes and performed almost instant, high speed, ninety-degree turns. Nothing flying, then or now, with the exception of Superman, can do this.

Oh, yeah? Hani Hanjour could. That and more! What a loss to aviation he was.

 
 

Hmm, maybe they’re not the same guy after all… Actually, I’m kind of with Dr. Ray on this one. You know, the part about the molten lava and all.

Why do you think I cast Baker as the evil twin? As Dr. Ray has made _abundantly_ clear, he’s simply misunderstood by those of us who are too “educated stupid” to accept the truth of Cubicism. He’s kind of like Frankenstein’s Monster…and by that, I mean he has green skin and represents man’s hubris.

I hadn’t been to http://www.timecube.com in a while…it’s like be enveloped in a bubble of 100% pure crazy; quite spectacular. But think about this: Gene feels like this all (4 simultaneous and harmonic) day. I don’t know how often he updates it nowadays, but he apparently had a recent feud with Wikipedia. He’s like a 21st century Don Quixote.

He was also apparently a huge marbles enthusiast in his salad days, but no longer, as their spherical nature contradicts what he now knows about the four-sided cube. This piece of trivia is perhaps the loopiest, droopiest, most crushable softball ever pitched by the Internet

 
 

OX-HO is such a publicity freak. We tell him to leave the humans alone, we are only here for the cattle, but will he listen?

Sadly, no.

So we end up looking like sick anal probing freaks, because OX-HO is “curious”. Still, it is odd how many guys from the sticks go looking for UFO’s even after hearing about all the anal probing, huh? Takes all kinds, I guess…

 
 

Ouch. This part makes my head hurt:

“UFOs, unidentified flying objects, by definition are not necessarily extraterrestrial spaceships”

I understand that UFOs does not mean “extraterrestrial spaceships.” I don’t understand how something BY DEFINITION NOT NECESSARILY is something else. You mean that it is impossible to define UFOs as spaceships? The definition prevents them all from being spaceships? Does this have something to do with logic and entailment and stuff?

Ouch.

 
 

Almost all of these names would be awesome for a garage band.

“Give a Big John’s Long Bar welcome to our local 80’s hairband cover band, BOVINE-TART!”

just sayin’

 
 

“BISON-SKANK?�

I am offended.

 
 

HOOVED STOCK-WOMAN OF UNCERTAIN VIRTUE!

um, no?

 
 

Ow. Damn. Man, that cat saw the cliff, threw it down into fourth, and drove right over, didn’t he? Scary thing is, not too long ago, there was a convention of some bunch of Christians or another, and one of ’em left a pile of literature in one of the tables at work. We were highly entertained for days, and one in particular, noted that UFO’s and aliens weren’t actually from OUTER SPAAAACE but demonic manifestations. Which I thought was particular humorous as I’d just finished Sagan’s Demon Haunted World.

That all being said, if any of y’all are in psychic contact with space aliens, tell ’em to come and get me. I’m ready to go.

 
 

Is that Corrado Soprano on the left of the photo? I knew he was crazy, but not crazy enough to work for Renew America.

 
 

Okay, Ralph explains the unidentified part and Brad clears up the flying thing, but I still don’t understand why they’re called objects.

 
 

One more thing. If OX-HO is around, then PANDA-PANDER can’t be far behind.

 
 

I am always amused by Fundies who have absolutely no trouble at all believing the earth is 6,000 years old, and yet can be smugly dismissive of the paranormal.

 
 

RUMINANT-TEASE is the DC chapter leader of Aliens Anonymous.

 
 

Alternatly, them UFOs could be subverting Christian beliefs (pleased to be providing evidence? Other then one book?) because Christianity is the one FALSE religion and has no place in the Great Galataic Melting Pot.
Just a suggestion.
Fun story time!
My best friend’s father, a ret. Lt. Col. in the Air Force, used to be a bomb-nav for B-1 lancers. Back in the day, when the military could get away with a lot more hijinks then now, they were flying over the midwest at night, and bored. So he gets this idea.
They were passing over a major highway at relitively low altitude, and when the timing was right, he told the pilot to hit the afterburners for a few seconds. For those of you playing the homegame, B-1s have four engines, and afterburners inject fuel directly into the engine exhaust, creating a jet of purple flame that glows and smolders in the air.
The radio guy had piped in the local trucking frequency, and musch fun wa shad as they squawked, “Holy shit! Did you fucking see that!? That was a goddamn UFO!”
Indeed.

 
 

I once saw some UFO woo-woos arguing with some Xtian fundies about “aline abductions.” The woos said that they were aliens doing medical experiments, the fundies claimed they were demons… It was kind of a “Battle of the Woo-Woos” and I wish it ha been taped for youtube..

 
 

What a coincidence – BISON-SKANK was the password that came with my AOL disk.

 
 

Goddammit, I got WATERBUFFALO-WHORE, but you guys sucked up all the funny, so I got no way to use it.

 
 

The real threat to this fundie nutjob is “New Age” belief, which assigns “spiritual” attributes to, well, just about every goddam thing. Like UFOs. Like crystals, and moon rocks and the Magic Eightball.

This nebulous spirituality usually includes Jesus Christ – along with Ramtha and Buddha and fairies and elves and Uri Geller. It’s the fact that ol’ JC gets lumped in with this fake stuff (when we all know He’s real fake stuff) that bothers them. It’s disrespectful. And evil. Etc.

 
 

In other news, wingnuts are stupid.

 
 

(when we all know He’s real fake stuff)

Ah, you mean like “genuine plastic fruit” or “authentic replica”?

Perhaps, “true Naugahyde”?

 
 

Damn! mikey made the roofies joke before I could! Damn, I say!
oh, an aside. My extraterrestrial friend VACHE-PUTAIN informs me that OX-HO is D-Ho’s brother. Gad! Horowitz an alien! That certainly explains a few things.

 
 

All I can think of when I see that guy’s pic (the second one) is:
KNEEL BEFORE ZOD!!

 
 

Is this guy now a challenger to Pastor Swank? Maybe someone should warn him….

This post has just made my day…. Also unable to stop laughing….

 
 

GNU-COOZE

I’m with nature on the whole vacuum thing

 
destroy_us_all!
 

These people look like the family from the Hills Have Eyes.

 
 

You won’t want to miss part 2 of this little chestnut. It’s up now at http://www.worldviewweekend.com/secure/cwnetwork/article.php?&ArticleID=868

In it, Rev. Barker answers the question I know I have been wondering about:

“Even the greatest skeptic would have to admit that there are still unexplained UFO sightings. So, what are they? Are they alien spaceships? Are they visitors from the future? Or, are they something else.”

Yep, you guessed it.

“I believe they are demons. Just think about it.”

There is also a thoughtful discussion of the theological conundrums presented by the existence of these alien beings. The squeamish should be forewarned before actually reading it, however, since one of the dilemmas the Rev. ponders is whether it would be OK to eat the aliens. Uh . . . yeah.

 
 

For anyone who’s interested in Ox-Ho (and if you aren’t, you’re brain-dead), this cool alien communicated with Robin MacPherson of Burnaby, BC in the 1960s. Ms.MacPherson founded a group called Light Affiliates who believed that the world would come to an end in 1969. In 1970, the group preached that the world had indeed come to an end but that we didn’t know about it because it was the psychic world that ended. Or it’s the psychic world we’re living in and the physical world that ended. Or something. By 1972 Light Affiliates had come to an end. Ox-Ho may have more to say. Look to the skies!

 
 

Holy crap, you forgot to feature the Best.Renew.America.Profile.Photo.Ever.
Ladies and gentlemen, Mr. Fred Hutchison!

 
Retired Catholic
 

I hope they’re nicer than Xenu. Since Christianity, Buddhism, Hinduism and Islam are all old and Paganism mostly died a while back, does that mean the spiritual ascendancy of the Flying Spaghetti Monster is at hand? Will the Squiggly One ascend the Celestial Thrown so soon? It’s simply too good to be true. The Age of an Infinity of Sauces is at hand.

 
 

OutOfContext said,

July 12, 2006 at 18:03

Truly an inspirational site…
Led me to this video and now my booty drops like the Walls of Jericho. This one would have been a good early volley in your YouTube wars.

Oh.my.god.

Or rather, oh.not.my.god. Yikes yikes. That’s a claaaasic. How I wish I was still in touch with my Source friends of the early 1990s. This guy is straight-up CHANNELING the Diabolical Bizmarquee. Oh, YOU got what I NEED!!!

 
 

I think Smitty The OC White Boy Rapping About Jesus is actually kinda hot. His booty does indeed drop like the walls of Jericho.

 
 

nothing makes me angrier than when the voices in my head are echoing the wisdom of the REINDEER-SLATTERN. nothing.

very very few things.

 
 

I think I’ve found crazier, at first thought it was satire but..

http://www.shelleytherepublican.com/

 
 

6. I am amazed that you are so quickly deserting Him who called you by the grace of Christ, for a different gospel.
Yeah, like those good Christians who can now justify torture (cause they’re askeert).

9. As we have said before, so I say again now, if any man is preaching to you a gospel contrary to that which you received, let him be accursed.
Bush, John Yoo, Rummy, Bybee, Cheney…he’s talking about you.

God, this 6 years of Bush has felt like 20. Thanks for being here, S,N!

 
 

Hurrah! Now we godless libral secular humanists have aircover at last! Bwhahahahha!

The world shall be OURS! Bwhahahahhahahhhahaha- gasp-hahahhahahahahha…

BTW Apparently, aliens know a lot about love. They want to share it with us.

But the they dont know anything about this earth thing we call ‘kissing’, and we can use that to turn all the hot go-go boot clad invaders to turn on thier own kind. We call it the Kirk Doctrine.

 
 

FOLLOWER-OF-GURU-RIGORMORTIS-YAK

EDINBURGH-TOOTHPASTE-REVOLUTIONARY

TRANS-CAUCUSOID

Hmmm. These names should be nicely inconspicous…

 
 

I think I know that woman between old bald guy and young bald guy. She is insane

 
 

Wait, I’m confused. The Urantia book (which was the basis for 2001, so it must be true) tells me that angels are really aliens. What the truth?? Damn obelisk, can’t trust them for a second!! Help me…..

 
 

Stop stop stop!!! I’m supposed to be at work, but I’m crying helplessly with laughter….

*sniff*

Better now.

I think it was Ox-Ho that sent me over the edge – the question on Pauli’s fermion exclusion principle was good, but Ox-Ho????

Who wants to be the first to tell this nutter about Xenu the alien and all about *that* particular brand of looneys?

Alternatively, how about getting in touch with him to agree with his theories and tell him how Ox-Ho might trick all of humanity into entering their mothership called Ur-Anus?

The possibilities are endless, but some of us have to earn a real living *sigh*

 
 

In conclusion I submit that the evidence or lack thereof points to a satanic deception and it is working.

Best Sentence Ever Used In A Debate Anywhere.

 
 

Vaara: it gets even better, as the whackjob is now claiming that his Onion article post was a joke nobody else got, except that it really is true, you know. So there.
Meanwhile, while attempting, possibly, to be serious, he claims in a newer post that eyeballs and livers from aborted fetuses are sold on the streets. I assume for transplantation into amoebas. Someone needs to explain to these folks that the huge full term babies on the signs are not what’s actually being aborted.

 
 

Or just turn your column over to Prophet Yahweh.

Oh god, not that guy. He makes TimeCube guy seem like a Nobel Laureate. A friend of mine has an ongoing fight with him about whether not (by the way, the answer is not) an obscure Celtic god (Esus) is really Jesus, who is really an alien. Or something.

This almost makes up for the Swank drought.

 
Herr Doktor Bimler
 

he claims in a newer post that eyeballs and livers from aborted fetuses are sold on the streets

This is not true. They are sold in pubs. Savage Henry was running a raffle for a whole bucketful, down at the Old Entomologist last night, $2 a ticket.

 
 

[…] Via Sadly, No!, I come across a two-set series of articles called UFOs and the Gospel of Christ, by one Ralph C. Barker: Part 1 is here and Part 2 is here. […]

 
Colonel Cathcart
 

UFOs, unidentified flying objects, by definition are not necessarily extraterrestrial spaceships. Rather, they are something that can’t be readily identified thus “unidentified� flying objects.

And that’s why I call this song Alice’s Restaurant.

 
Colonel Cathcart
 

The modern UFO craze began in 1947 with the famous “Roswell Incident.� It was reported by witnesses that a UFO had crashed in Roswell, New Mexico, and that the United States Government had recovered the bodies of alien visitors. Allegedly, the bodies were taken to what today is known as Area 51. Many believe that they are still there.My purpose today, however, is not to stir up our fascination with UFOs but rather to expose how New Agers are using our fascination to further their false gospel.

And we was fined $50 and had to pick up the garbage in the snow, but thats not what I came to tell you about.

Came to talk about the Draft.

 
 

Not much more to add; stumbled into this party late. Just wanted to seize the one opportunity I’ll have in this terresterial mammalian incarnation to type: GNU-STRUMPET!

 
 

That picture is simply awesome. He looks like some sort of walk on actor in a crappy western. “I found gold I tells ya! GOLD!”

 
 

Just took their poll on “What do you think of the Biblical account of a world-wide flood and Noah’s Ark?”

82% voted True.

Color me surprised!

Special Bonus! Kirk Cameron, Way of the Master, is one of their contributors!

 
 

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