Fly, Fly, Fly, Fly!
Posted on July 10th, 2010 by Tintin
Shorter Jim Hoft, Gateway Dumbtwit
Taliban Training Killer Monkeys to Shoot Americans!
- I’ll believe absolutely anything.
‘Shorter’ concept created by Daniel Davies and perfected by Elton Beard. We are aware of all Internet traditions.™
From his link:
Yes, that would fall under the category of “I’ll believe absolutely anything”.
But the real question is, when the killer monkeys march, will they chant “Yo de oh, yoh-oh”?
I am so getting out of the boat for this one!
Mangoes guarded by killer monkeys? Must be damn tasty mangoes; I’m gonna brave it.
All of those “Support your right to arm bears” bumperstickers aren’t so funny now, huh? HUH?
The new U.S. military policy is “Don’t fire until you see the purple of their asses”.
THEY’VE RECRUITED MY BUTLER!!!!
AAAAGGHHHHH!!! ITS NOT WORTH IT CLEANSE MY BRAIN WITH FIRE NOW PLEASE!!!!
The comments section will make you dumber. My brain cells that are responsible for holding those memories are currently being strangled by the ones around them.
Got out of the boat, and the commenters there are taking this seriously. I guess that tells us all we need to know about who reads that idiot.
I heard that the green berets have begun recruiting Harpy Eagles to eat the Taliban monkeys, so there Hoft!
Oh, man, we should totally retaliate with Bonobo Mata Hairies.
I got out of the boat too… the gullibility of the commenters is exceeded only by their racism.
Also, this cries out for the bears and pumas pic.
I, too, was skeptical until I saw the images at the People’s Daily. Plus, they cite a report by a British-based media agency, so it’s serious. Plus also, the audio version of the article is very convincing.
Read the comments sections for the avalanche of “Obama is a monkey” comments.
Honorable mentions to
Of course.
Right. They don’t drink water. That’s why they’re still alive to annoy your imaginary Afghan training friend.
And this
Nom de Plume: From his link:
The People’s Daily of China reports
How long until it’s also on Pravda.ru?
I got out of the boat, and the
mangoescomments are yummy! “Looks like Obamma, hur hur hur.” Jesus, right-wingers are subhuman. And these halfwits are gonna “go Galt”? Be gone, morons, no one will even notice your absence.But the real question is, when the killer monkeys march, will they chant “Yo de oh, yoh-oh”?
I believe that is mandatory.
~
I am truly amazed at the gullibility. I bet Hoft is waiting breathlessly for his bank statement with the million dollar transfer from Nigeria.
I WANT TO BELIEVE … that this is just Hoft pulling a spoof, but Sadly, I Doubt It.
Unfortunately, even now America remains blissfully unaware of Al-Quaeda’s top-secret team of reconnaisance-tenrecs – fanatical (& relentlessly fertile) rodent cadres able to insert their tiny snouts anywhere to sniff out sensitive intel, & trained to commit suicide with teeny-tiny scimitars if captured.
Soon the Taliban will launch their Hanuman army at the US and won’t we be sorry we didn’t nuke ’em from orbit long ago. The wingnut will just harrumpf and tell us “we told you so” as we vainly try to fight off the hordes of killer monkeys.
Why oh why didn’t we listen to you in the first place??
Our only hope is to retreat deep underground and form a cult that worships a cold war era nuke.
Damn you! Damn you all to helllllll!
Our only hope is to retreat deep underground and form a cult that worships a cold war era nuke.
Psychic powers, also, but only if you send money to James Dobson.
I wonder if any are named Cornelius?
People’s Daily Online
I don’t know: in southern rural areas people are in the habit of using the same name for multiple generations, putting Roman numerals after it to avoid confusion. From my experience, they’re usually white. Seems like a profound lack of imagination to me.
Unfortunately, even now America remains blissfully unaware of Al-Quaeda’s top-secret team of reconnaisance-tenrecs – fanatical (& relentlessly fertile) rodent cadres able to insert their tiny snouts anywhere to sniff out sensitive intel, & trained to commit suicide with teeny-tiny scimitars if captured.
Don’t mean to step on your
dicktenrec, but they’d be Afrosoricidaean cadres. Sorry, I’m just really pedantic about this sort of stuff.from that same link
Yeah, PETA has a lot of influence with the Pentagon.
Those mangoes are juicy but I think they’ve gone over. The folks over there have obviously overdosed on fermented fruit pulp.
Exclusive picture of Soviet trained chimp assassin:
http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_ONNOnP9IP8A/Rb3dBXJvWnI/AAAAAAAAADc/cUYfJmpBIac/s400/Weston_Dmitri.jpg
Here’s that same prone monkey, from an April 16, 2008 blog post at a place called WOPICO.
Thanks for that link to People’s Daily, though whilst reading the Top 10 Celebrity Drug Users I stumbled across this sentence:
“Senior pop singer Man Wenjun was arrested for taking dancing outreach while celebrating his wife’s birthday with friends in May 2009. ”
‘dancing outreach’ wtf? Assuming this is a bit of slang that didn’t translate properly, my guess is he was taking ecstasy as I associate that drug with hug-prone ravers.
Any Sinophiles or -phones gimme a clue?
“If a person who loves animals knows the monkeys may be injured in the war, they might pressure the government to force the withdrawal of western forces in Afghanistan,” said one Taliban insider.
They know this is true because the photos of dead and mutilated children have been so effective.
To be concise, that’s the “Top 10 Celebrity Drug Users in China.”
Obligatory Simpsons clip
I hate every chimp I see
From chimpan A to chimpan Z
You’ll never make a monkey out of me
DAMN YOU TO HELL.
‘dancing outreach’ wtf? Assuming this is a bit of slang that didn’t translate properly, my guess is he was taking ecstasy as I associate that drug with hug-prone ravers.
Google says yes. Apparently it’s also called “ice” there.
Exactly. There may be a Animal Gap, but it is squarely in America’s favour.
A Animal Gap. That’s write, I wrote that.
great minds, etc. But I was in too much of a hurry, that is a shitty copy of that clip.
in southern rural areas people are in the habit of using the same name for multiple generations, putting Roman numerals after it to avoid confusion.
As a proud descendant of Citizens _I through _IX, I take exception to that remark.
Two words:
BANANA GAP!!!11!11!
I am totally prepared to crap in my pants here if it is called for!
Maybe it’s an EVIL MONKEY!
Monkey Knife Fight
Okay, now they’re just fucking with us, right? Right?!
Hoft misses the true horror of the story- the Talibaboons are being led by a retired U.S. Air Force colonel turned renegade.
Also, has anyone heard what happened to Bubbles after Michael Jackson’s death?
No, I don’t think they are.
Bubbles is at an animal sanctuary.
Haha, like I would fall for a crazee story like this one. Pah, I cannot be gulled so easily!
Didja know that the word “gullible” isn’t in the dictionary? Fact!
I betcha that even the Taliban don’t enforce DADT on their monkey troops.
Noen, I only watched the first part of that clip and I was laughing so hard I scared the dog.
Perhaps it is time for the Pentagon to unveil the Furry Battalion. WHO ELSE WILL DEFEND US FROM THE ISLAMOSIMIAN HORDE?
In order to defeat your enemy you must think like him.
Most formerly trained chimps end up at one of those places: when they grow up they don’t wanna take any more shit from trainers. And they grow up quick.
Has anyone bothered to mention that no monkeys are indigenous to Afghanistan? Or that one of those photos has a decidedly Indian temple in the background? Or that they are pretty old?
But then why would one bother?
Yo de oh, yoh-oh- Hey Hey we’re the Monkees
Gonna come in to your town
Busy singin’ HK swingin’ 99% Human DNA 100% hot lead enemas
Death to Infidels, gihad gihad gihad
Yuka Yuka Yuka Tooka Tooka Tooka gihad gihad…Yo de oh, yo-oh
Pupienus Maximus is of the monkeymilblogroll!
off the
Twelve monkeys with guns!
Chimps, which are not monkeys but primates just like us, don’t need no stinkin’ guns. They’ll just rip your face off. Chimps typically go after the face, the hands and your groin. That’s how they fight each other. They’ll just pull you hands off. Kinda hard to fight back when he’s got your balls in his hands and you just have those two bloody stumps.
Anyone who has ever seen Fred Wiseman’s 1974 documentary PRIMATE would know that it is actually us monkees that are training the gihadists to shoot Americans.
Obviously, to counter a baboon battalion, the U.S. military has to start recruiting Rakshasas. Hmm… that’s like something out of a Tim Powers novel.
You think Abu Grabe torture tactic wasn’t tested on us first to make sure it was safe for humans?
There’s a lot of tough stuff to watch in Primate — graphic scenes of chimps getting cut open and dissected while they’re still alive, apes being sedated and then violated with vibrating anal probes.
What, no lame ass pun about gorilla warfare?
noen said,
July 10, 2010 at 18:25
Monkey Knife Fight
Call now, and get Fart Dust for only $4.99!
(Yep, I watched the whole thing.)
~
Monkey Knife Fight
Call now, and get Fart Dust for only $4.99!
(Yep, I watched the whole thing.)
~
It’s worse than I thought. Fart Dust! What will the Jihadist think of next?!
What, no lame ass pun about gorilla warfare?
DOH!
You think Abu Grabe torture tactic wasn’t tested on us first to make sure it was safe for humans?
I wonder if torturing monkeys will reveal intelligence?
Well, it doesn’t hurt to be sure. Torture the monkeys! It’s just like boys having fun at a frat party, that’s what Rush says…
Substance McGravitas said,
July 10, 2010 at 18:15
A Animal Gap. That’s write, I wrote that.
We’ve got lagomorphs and dancing grannies.
We’re gonna kick ass!
~
Is there some way to torture the Taliban’s monkeys with one hand while teasing Glenn Beck’s panther with the other? I have an, um, friend who wants to know.
Holy slinging feces, Batman!
Obviously, Bonzo escaped and is leading the simians. I blame Zombie Reagan.
Remember the days when folks would read the Weekly World News on the john knowing full well it was all a bunch of crap and still get a laugh from it?
Sigh.
I’m watching Planet of the Apes as I type this. Now I’m scared. Is it a movie? Or PROPHECY?!
“N__B said,
July 10, 2010 at 18:11
I hate every chimp I see
From chimpan A to chimpan Z
You’ll never make a monkey out of me”
*snort* everything coming together in a weird way today.
Note the updated Thomas Sowell granny.
http://i29.tinypic.com/tzee1.gif
Remember the days when folks would read the Weekly World News on the john knowing full well it was all a bunch of crap and still get a laugh from it?
Well, seeing that the entire wingnutosphere is based on the editorial style of “Ed Anger”, I’d guess that the wingnuts never got the joke.
I miss the Drill Down to Hell stories but someone on Art Bell would come on every now and then to play the tape of the suffering souls, so there’s some continuity in a different medium.
+5 for the Thomas Sowell granny.
Police sanctioned torture for thee, but not for Thomas granny!
~
” folks would read the Weekly World News on the john knowing full well it was all a bunch of crap”
Wha–?
Those Taliban monkeys will be no match for Bat Boy.
I order vacuumslayer to do cool things with VVVV.
http://vvvv.org/tiki-index.php
Those Taliban monkeys will be no match for Bat Boy.
The President’s half-brother is on the case. The best thing about the WWN is that it, unlike most newspapers these days, does follow-up pieces.
The US already uses monkeys in warfare. Who do you think is operating those UAVs? Unmanned aerial vehicles, hello??
This story really makes me think. I mean, if a monkey can operate a machine gun, maybe they can teach us about love!
I can never decide if VVVV is four V’s or two W’s.
(yes, there’s a joke there, I’m not touching it.)
Here we come
Bombing down the street
We get the dealiest looks from
Everyone we meet!
Hey, hey we’re the Monkees,
and people say we monkey around.
But we’re too busy plottin’
to bring the entire West down!
We kill whoever we want to,
That’s what we like to do.
We don’t have time to get restless,
There’s always something new.
Hey, hey we’re the Monkees,
and people say we monkey around.
But we’re too busy plottin’
to bring the entire West down!
We’re just trying to be friendly,
Come join us and destroy the West!
We’re the young generation,
And we got something to **BOOOOM**.
Hey, hey we’re the Monkees,
You never know where we’ll be found.
So you’d better get ready,
We are defintely comin to your town (To kill yOU!)
Hey, hey we’re the Monkees,
and people say we monkey around.
But we’re too busy plottin’
to brin the West on down!
Not the first mention I’ve seen of monkeys in Afghanistan. Recently read of it in a news report about combat operations, I think in the eastern part of the country. Went looking for answers, didn’t find anything, really, at this link:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wildlife_of_Afghanistan
But did find out they have more wildlife there than you might think. It’s not all rocks and dust.
I bet Obama has a whole stable of killer monkeys, ready and eager to fly into the Senate and rip toupees off Senator’s heads and … no, I suppose he doesnt’. Damm.
I wish I had a flying killer monkey.
Eunuchs, obviously.
Eunuchs, obviously.
Sea turtles, mate.
I think the idea is to take thousands of these killer monkeys and let them type the scripts for FOXNOOZ shows — interestingly, so that those might be improved.
Attention Anyone Who is Has Yet to Disembark from the Boat
If you must get out of the boat, read the story, laugh and get out.
Do NOT read the comments. They’re exactly as bad as you expect.
Instead I encourage you to wait for Louie Gohmert to bring the threat of Terrorist Taliban Chimps to the attention of his colleagues in the House.
Fear not.
They’ll be no match for our laser beam equipped sharks.
Go ahead! Touch the monkey!
TOUCH IT!!
…Training Killer Monkeys…
That old School of the Americas gag again?
Re. the comments:
“Mohammedans?” What is this, the 19th century?
“Mohammedans?” What is this, the 19th century?
One doesn’t demonstrate one’s superiority by indulging in bastardizations.
Well, if it’s an order. If I can make heads or tails of what the hell it is, I’m sure I’ll play.
Also too re: the comments–too late. Chris already brought some over and stank up the whole damn thread. (I’m joshing Chris…it’s not his fault those people are cretins.)
Ah, but I’m sure our top secret team of superintelligent Dolphin hackers will totally disrupt the evil monkey training camp’s computers.
If not, there are always the Wolverines.
A-Fucking-Hem!!
I suppose it’s only just, as I didn’t credit Green Eagle either.
@M. Bouffant — Not to burst any bubbles, but the proprietors often don’t have the time to read every single comment thread, so I didn’t see your perceptive comment. Obviously, however, great minds, etc., etc.
27% of the country thinks like they do.
(goes to drink another bottle of gin)
Not to burst any bubbles, but the proprietors often don’t have the time to read every single comment thread
Liberal slackers. Don’t even try to pretend you have real jobs!
Tintin, I sympathize w/ your having a life & job & stuff which keep you from obsessive 18-hr./day Internet perusal.
And I do know if you had copped it straight from my comment, you would’ve given credit.
the proprietors often don’t have the time to read every single comment thread
You don’t know what you’re missing.
You don’t know what you’re missing.
Maybe they do.
Off topic question: Any gamers here? Do you guys/gals know what Gelaskins are? Some guy wants to pay to put one of my pieces on his joystick (your joke here). Do you know what this is? Do people customize their joysticks? God, I’m old.
Yes.
No.
Hee hee hee.
No.
No idea.
I doubt it.
lol. I appreciate your concision.
What? Oh, I was just practicing for my senate confirmation hearings.
Nah. In that case, you would have said even less.
Gelaskins Cool.
FYWP.
Gelaskins
Cool.
Those creepy things are not getting anywhere near my joystick.
Hey now. I don’t think we should be referring to DKW’s mom’s assets as “creepy”. Let’s be nice.
BTW, this is the actual email header:
I was like “WTF?” Afraid it was spam…or something far worse.
The only possible response: I don’t paint miniatures.
You should definitely do that vacuumslayer. You can make serious money off the oddest things. You might also want to consider painting or designing skateboard decks. Guys that can’t skateboard any more still want to have a reminder of their glory days. People don’t really buy framed art that much anymore. But they will pay money to personalize their gadgets or the tools of their hobbies.
Marketing vacuumslayer, marketing!
So I have come upon the corpse of this thread. Will the police think I killed it?
[On Morocco’s contribution to the Iraq War]
George W. Bush: Then of course there was Morocco, who pledged to send 2,000 monkeys to detonate land mines and perform at children’s parties. Then there seemed to be some question as to whether or not Morocco had the monkeys, and I said, “Regardless of whether they have them or not, that sounds cool as shit and I want that.” A special unit of 2,000 trained monkeys that we can send anywhere in the world to fight evil and make children laugh? Duh! Despite vigorous protests from my Cabinet, I put into motion Operation Primate Speargun. For one year, a special unit of 2,000 wild monkeys trained side by side with the 82nd Airborne down at Fort Bragg in total secrecy. In order to ensure a maximum covert operation, most of the training was done at night. I was heavily invested in the unit, so I’d often fly down to participate in field exercises, and one of the things I noticed during the exercises was that many of the monkeys would simply run off into the woods, randomly shooting their spearguns at each other or inanimate objects. So I asked my field commanders, I said, “How often had this been happening?” And they said that this type of thing had happened every single time. So then I asked a tough question, “Why do you think it’s happening?” The Major said that his guess was because they were wild monkeys, and that they as soldiers didn’t have the proper training to work with them. So I looked at ’em right in the eye, and I said, “But we’re gonna get there, right?” He said, “I doubt it, Sir.” I said, “Well, hold on, let me ask you this. Are they at least entertaining the children?” He said he’d have no idea of knowing, but that his guess would be no, considering it was a top secret operation and no one knew the monkeys were there, especially the children. At the end of exercises, all but forty monkeys had run off into the North Carolina woods. Speargun attacks along the I-95 corridor have increased 1,000 percent in that time. So let me just tell you this: if you’re planning a car trip down to Disney World, don’t stop at the rest stops, okay? ‘Cause there’s a 50-50 chance a malnourished monkey is gonna pop up out of a toilet, shoot you in the face with a speargun.”
noen, you’re totally right. Which is why I gave Mr. Joystick the go-ahead.
Also, Looch is a MURDERER!
PS–how are you feeling?
*poke* Thread appears to be dead. I’m gonna have sex with it now. That’s not weird, right?
So let me just tell you this: if you’re planning a car trip down to Disney World, don’t stop at the rest stops, okay? ‘Cause there’s a 50-50 chance a malnourished monkey is gonna pop up out of a toilet, shoot you in the face with a speargun.”
I SOOOOO owe my Aunt an apology.
🙁
I’m not dead yet!
Feeling a little better.
*poke* Thread appears to be dead. I’m gonna have sex with it now. That’s not weird, right?
I believe you want to let the thread lie on its stomach for a bit if you wish to proceed in this fashion.
A friend told me that.
“PS–how are you feeling?”
Who?
“I’m not dead yet!”
Threads never die. Isn’t there one here that hit the 2000 comment mark?
The friend said it is called PTT: Post trauma tumescence.
Gravity is your friend.
Is it weird I think can think about these things?
Don’t answer that.
I’m not dead yet!
/ob. Monty Python quote
Perhaps I should have read all the recent comments before yapping off. I just woke up.
Wake Up Sheeple!
P-nus.
Two comments et. No wonder the thread is dead.
BeeDenver Micha’s Weredragon Scone
All you do is get evil weredragon and put vanilla and cocoa on top of it before sconing it. That – putting those seasonings on top – is the secret. Candy the meat, then put it on top of some archer frog foot. Put Oaxaca cheese (at all grocery stores, make sure to get this Oaxaca cheese too) over top of it. Put it in the microwave for 90 seconds. You can add to it whatever you want. Some people put a layer of table cream on it and just eat it like that. I chop up cream of coconut, onion and Mizithra cheese and put them on top, as well as Philippine eagle wing. WARNING: You will never be able to order evil weredragon at a restaurant or bar ever again, as they simply won’t measure up to the ones you can make at home.
okaaaaayyyy.
“Your search – BeeDenver Micha’s Weredragon Scone – did not match any documents.”
Uh, can anyone else post links?
Ludwig Wittgenstein’s Soy milk Mincemeat
Ingredients:
3 pinches ladybug, marinated
1 stick soy milk
1 tooth of wolf
6 jars goose nose
6 pinches brown sugar
7 jars basil
Begin praying. Cream the ladybug with a really big can opener. Stir the soy milk with the tooth of wolf over medium heat in a bowl. Stuff the resulting concoction into the ladybug. Find some grapefruit juice and drink it. Strain – very boorishly – the goose nose, brown sugar, and the basil. Pound everything together. Roast for 68 minutes. Serves 14 enemies with quiet stomachs.
Link.
We surrender.
Another right wing senator is not crazy enough for the tea baggers.
Haha!
http://www.oliverwillis.com/2010/07/10/tea-party-express-targets-lisa-murkowski/
“my subjects its acceptance vine”
veiled computer generated penis reference
How many number threes do you suppose they’ll have to train?
Token Loc is in da house Yo!
http://www.oliverwillis.com/2010/07/08/michael-steeles-awesome-year/
We must stop the evil Mexican clowns before they take jobs from evil white American clowns in Arizona. Please alert John McCain and Governor Brewer! Also awesome mugshot also.
http://jonathanturley.org/2010/07/10/evil-clown-mexican-clown-arrested-for-allegedly-assaulting-stepdaughter/
🙁 nobody wants to play with me 🙁
Super-awesome author Rick Perlstein’s Facebook feed reporteth:
“Got this email today under the subject-heading ‘Congratulations on your recent book’:
Get ready…jerkoff…..
Your thesis about the takeover of the country by left-wing scumbags
… is
about to evaporate !!!!!
Why are you such a left-wing asshole ?????”
The above was clearly sent by either Troofie or Dick Morris.
I suspect we have differing techniques when it comes to toilet use.
Peak Wingnut?
First comment:
“I wonder if this? is the same Ernest J Pagels that was arrested for peeing on a car:
Disorderly – Ernest J. Pagels, 46, of the City of Waukesha was cited for disorderly conduct after two witnesses saw him urinate on a tire on a vehicle parked at Waukesha County Technical College at about 6:40 p.m. Feb. 24.”
Fuckin’ RINO. A TRUE Republican would replace “peeing” with “masturbating” and “car” with “small child’.
I, for one, welcome our new killer monkey overlords. (And not just because “New Killer Monkey Overlords” would be the coolest band name ever.)
Their first mission: terrorize everyone on this thread who failed to deliver a Peter Gabriel pun. Your dereliction is just shocking.
It was probably a foreign born commie moonbat car like a Volvo or a Prius. This fact will only help him in the primary.
I was going to write a parody version but the lyrics seem perfect as is so:
Shock the monkey to life
Shock the monkey to life
Cover me when I run
Cover me through the fire
Something knocked me out’ the trees
Now I’m on my knees
Cover me, darling please
Monkey, monkey, monkey
Don’t you know when you’re going to shock the monkey
Fox the fox
Rat the rat
You can ape the ape
I know about that
There is one thing you must be sure of
I can’t take any more
Darling, don’t you monkey with the monkey
Monkey, monkey, monkey
Don’t you know you’re going to shock the monkey
Wheels keep turning
Something’s burning
Don’t like it but I guess I’m learning
Shock! – watch the monkey get hurt, monkey
Cover me, when I sleep
Cover me, when I breathe
You throw your pearls before the swine
Make the monkey blind
Cover me, darling please
Monkey, monkey, monkey
Don’t you know you’re going to shock the monkey
Too much at stake
Ground beneath me shake
And the news is breaking
Shock! – watch the monkey get hurt, monkey
Shock the monkey
Shock the monkey
Shock the monkey to life
Good find, gocart. Gunning for Murkowski, now that is truly lulz-worthy.
‘Cause there’s a 50-50 chance a malnourished monkey is gonna pop up out of a toilet, shoot you in the face with a speargun.
I for one am more concerned about the p00p-eating sloths.
I’m sure everyone else here has already seen this, but I lol’d hard.
And it’s not like sharia law doesn’t worry me too, but not only is humor the best weapon but that preacher they interviewed? p r o j e c t i o n.
Right-wing Christ stains can kiss my ass.
If a sloth shoots me, I will just step out of the way.
I’m sure everyone else here has already seen this also. JS and MC Steele muppet. I lol’d and then lol’d again.
http://www.bobcesca.com/blog-archives/2010/07/steele_crazy_af.html
ponzi scheme of stupid, indeed
gocart mozart said,
July 11, 2010 at 4:34
Another right wing senator is not crazy enough for the tea baggers.
Haha!
http://www.oliverwillis.com/2010/07/10/tea-party-express-targets-lisa-murkowski/
For all of you who can’t get enough of princess crazy eyes, see some new Murkowski interview HERE:
http://www.thealaskastandard.com/content/channel-11s-matt-felling-takes-lisa-murkowski#comment-18601
Okay, I fell asleep from it too….
Stumbled across this at WoC. Ahh, memories.
http://world-o-crap.com/blog/
Read what Bill does on the phone with a vibrator “shaped like a cock with a little battery in it.” Count 66 for those keeping score at home.
http://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive/1013043mackris14.html
I for one am more concerned about the p00p-eating sloths.
The NYC Department of Environmental Protection is looking to import some of those. Now that the sewer gators are extinct, it would be safe to introduce sewer sloths as a measure to reduce outfall.
Hmm. Yeah. Likely. We all know you’ve just been giving Zira the gladeye and trying to impress her. Pervert. Where is Santorum when you really need him?
Poop eater
Last I heard, Santorum was helping BP with his Santroleum.
and still, righties get mad when the left suggests that they are a) racist and b) gullible…
I bet he would throw the afghan monkey on the sea :p
And your little dog, too, Jim…
It is amazing how much Hoft looks like that preacher who blew himself up in the movie “Contact”.
That flying monkey’s Wizard of Oz outfit is “to die for”!