Remember to Buy Sheri and Scott’s Book, You Bastards!!!1!
I received my copy of Better Living Through Bad Movies in the mail yesterday, and it’s bloody hilarious. And when I say hilarious, I mean hilarious. It’s not like most allegedly “funny” books that ellicit a few smiles and the occasional chuckle. No, Sheri and Scott’s magnum opus has made me laugh out loud several times, and I’m only 30 pages into it. Particularly OMGROFLMFAOMF!1!!!111!-worthy is their summary of The Postman, a suicide-inducing 177-minute post-apocalyptic “thriller” starring Kevin Costner. I hope Scott and Sheri won’t mind me excerpting a teensy-weensy passage they wrote about The Postman’s adventures in sperm donation:
That night at the You’ve Got Mail dance, Kevin meets Abby, a comely young woman who asks about his height, IQ, and semen. It turns out she wants a baby, but her husband had “the bad mumps” and so they want Kevin to be the child’s “body father.”
As anyone who’s seen The Postman can tell you, the dialogue really is this stupid- it’s like the producers hired Pastor Swank to touch up the script. You almost expect Costner to tell Abby that he’d be happy to father her womb baby global. Anyway, back to Scott’n’Sheri:
Of course, the one-time bedding is successful and she becomes pregnant- proving that while FedEx may have a better on-time record for package delivery, the U.S. postal service is still your best bet for delivering sperm. (A better title for this movie might have been “The Postman Cometh.”)
The whole book is chock-fulla brilliantly sarcastic insights like this. Truly, it reads like Chicken Soup for the MST3K Soul. Buy it, buy it, buy it.
Is this the new talking point from Townhouse?
It has worked on me. I liked The Postman in book form. I thought the movie needed a few edits. Like 80 minutes’ worth.
Chuckles- Kos gets 70% of all profits made from books sold by bloggers. So yes, he told me to plug it again.
Also, I really like it.
I liked the Postman in book form too, although I thought it was pretty sexist. Oh well, he made up for it with the Uplift War.
I bought this book, and that same day I found a dollar by the dumpster!
Coincidence?
OK, I’ll click the link and buy the book. Who gets the kickback?
I also received my copy yesterday, via the US Postal Service. Coincidence or Daily Kos manipulation or time and space? Agreed, it’s like having MST3K in print form, without the robots but with just as many laughs. Nice work, S.Z. and Scott C.
Yeah, I need this book. It looks awesome.
Of course, I just received $3.75 from Kos for saying that.
I loved s.z.’s recent retelling of Red Dawn or whatever that movie was with Patrick Swayze and a band of heroic Brat Packers. It’s gotta be in the book, I’m sure. The woman is like the funniest person ever, and so is, I imagine, her coauthor.
Shouldn’t the headline here be, “…You Magnificent Bastards!!!1!”?
Thanks for the re-plug, Brad! Our master, Kos, will be pleased with your actions, young Sith Lord.
Seriously, your check for .25 will be in the mail shortly.
Oh, and I love your idea of having Pastor Swank, Script Doctor. I can’t wait to see the new screenplay for Super Man Returns to Smash Homo Nups.
Thanks, Brad! Very glad to hear you’re enjoying the book. And feel free to excerpt any little thing that strikes your fancy.
And if anybody else has a kind word to say, don’t be shy about leaving a review on Amazon or Barnesandnoble. If, on the other hand, you’re filled exclusively with unkind and/or harsh words, forget Amazon and just sell them directly to Ann Coulter. She’s apparently depleted her own resources and is having to import bile handcrafted by liberal-hating, arch-conservative 12-year olds in Viet Nam.
I loved s.z.’s recent retelling of Red Dawn or whatever that movie was with Patrick Swayze and a band of heroic Brat Packers. It’s gotta be in the book, I’m sure.
Red Dawn has a chapter to itself, featuring a new section of life lessons, and the true and shocking secret behind the Dick Cheney Shooting.
I got mine in the mail today, and already my teeth are whiter, my hair shinier and full of bounce, and I’ve lost seventeen pounds! And it can do the same for you!
Damn that Atlantic Ocean! Ordered mine almost a fortnight ago, and still nothing… I suspect the homo nups womb baby exterminationistas global.
This super-fine book arrived on a day when nobody was home and there were no interruptions as I cackled and chortled my way through. Buh-LISSSSSSS!