Teh stØØpid. It burns.

Just when you thought it couldn’t get worse than Shakira interjecting herself in Arizona’s illegal immigration policy…

Shakira can inject herself onto any of my policies.

I prefer Amy Alkon’s Balzac.

It’s like when Bil Keane is on vacation and Billy takes over The Family Circus. The joke, now ruined by a slovenly setup, is a fake-scrawled drawing of a play fort made of couch cushions with a Mokele Mbembe peeking out the top, fake-crayon-labeled, ‘Charles Hoy’s Fort.’

Bless it.

Don’t wade into the comments section. There are teleprompter “jokes.”

Heaven help her (and by her, I really mean us) if she ever catches up on yesterfortnight’s news about Kevin Costner. ZOMG Waterworld suxx0rz amirite?

Lori Ziganto, RedStateRag:

FIXED!

I’m sure she’s never seen Cameron’s Monsters of the Abyss (I think that’s the title) or his many docmentaries on the Titanic.

As a diver, I stand in awe of Cameron’s ROV skills. I’ve tried piloting one of those puppies and they ain’t easy. It’s like riding a Segway over a gravel road in a tornado.

Come to think of it, Cameron may have more hours logged at depths that equal or exceed Deepwater Horizon than anyone on the planet. He’d actually be one of the first people BP should have turned to.

Actor! please, don’t go interjecting facts into it. That just makes the wingers heads hurt…

The worst thing you could possibly do when faced with a crisis that requires the large scale use of remote underwater sensing platforms is to involve a world-renowned expert in the large-scale use of remote underwater sensing platforms. I mean, that would just be stoopid.

Next thing, they’ll probably hire Kevin Costner’s centrifuge machines. Hyuk

Hm, and here some conservatives seem to think the EVAL feds ought to do something.

Didn’t Winston Churchill consult with Ian Fleming about strategy during World War II? I can’t remember whether I read about that in a Robert Anton Wilson book, or a Jon Ronson book, but either way, it’s undoubtedly true!

Maybe they can hire El Mystico to put the well to sleep?

I just thought that it was important to point out that Shakira is ridiculously hawt.

ACC,

Close:

In 1939, on the eve of World War II, Rear Admiral John Godfrey, Director of Naval Intelligence of the Royal Navy, recruited Fleming (then a reserve subaltern in the Black Watch) as his personal assistant. He was commissioned first as a Royal Naval Volunteer Reserve lieutenant and subsequently promoted to Lieutenant Commander, then Commander. His known codename was 17F.[5]

In 1940, Fleming and Godfrey contacted Kenneth Mason, Professor of Geography at Oxford University, about preparing reports devoted to the geography of countries engaged in military operations. These reports were the precursors of the Naval Intelligence Division Geographical Handbook Series produced between 1941 and 1946.[6]

He instigated a plan named Operation Ruthless to obtain a German Naval Enigma documentation by crashing a captured German aeroplane into the English Channel, where the British crew, dressed in Luftwaffe uniforms, could be rescued by a German patrol boat. The “survivors” would then kill the German crew, and hijack the ship thus obtaining the Enigma secrets. Much to the annoyance of Alan Turing and Peter Twinn at Bletchley Park, it never actually happened. His niece Lucy Fleming in “The Bond Correspondence” on BBC Radio Four on 24 May 2008, stated that the reason given was that an official at the Royal Air Force pointed out that if they were to drop a downed Heinkel bomber in the English Channel, it would sink rather than float.

He also conceived of a plan to use British occultist Aleister Crowley to trick Rudolf Hess into attempting to contact a fake cell of anti-Churchill Englishmen in Britain, but this plan was not used because Rudolf Hess had flown to Scotland in an attempt to broker peace behind Hitler’s back. Anthony Masters’ book The Man Who Was M: The Life of Charles Henry Maxwell Knight asserts Fleming conceived the plan that lured Hess into flying to Scotland, in May 1941, to negotiate Anglo–German peace with Churchill, and resulted in Hess’s capture: this claim has no other source.[7]

Fleming also formulated Operation Goldeneye, a plan to maintain communication with Gibraltar as well as a plan of defence in the unlikely event that Spain joined the Axis Powers and, together with Germany, invaded the Mediterranean colony.

So I mean, the article specifically says that Cameron is an expert on underwater stuff… so how is this absurd? Oh right, because Cameron is one of those wooly-brained liberals. Surely the oil execs who let this happen know better.

Also, Lori, I’d be careful insulting Obama’s intelligence. After all, he has multiple well-written books, whereas you write like a high schooler. Just sayin’.

But… but… he’s a LIBERAL, and a CANADIAN!!!

Man, they’re really putting their foot in it, and the Goddamn Batman beat me to the punch (doesn’t he always?) with his Kevin Costner comment.

‘Charles Hoy’s Fort.’

This puts the LO! in LOL!

After all, he Bill Ayers has multiple well-written books, whereas you write like a high schooler.

Fixed for maximum wingnuttitude.

Oh right, because Cameron is one of those wooly-brained liberals. Surely the oil execs who let this happen know better.

Considering the bulk of his work involves bangbangshootemups, you’d think they’d be fapping like crazy.

3.1 The Terminator (1984)
3.2 Rambo: First Blood Part II (1985)
3.3 Aliens (1986)
3.4 The Abyss (1989)
3.5 Terminator 2: Judgment Day (1991)
3.6 True Lies (1994)

I mean, seriously, the guy who thought up Rambo2?????? A liberal???????

El Hijo Del Santo was on his way to help, but he was detained in Arizona.

I mean, seriously, the guy who thought up Rambo2?????? A liberal???????

That was, like, 25 years ago. They can barely remember last week. The only thing that matters is that he did a movie with a bunch of blue hippies in it.

Ruh-roh, ZRM’s gonna be upset with El Hijo Del Santo.

Bonus fun fact, Comehuevos is the Mexican term for Teabaggers.

I’d like to say that Red State is rock bottom of wingnut stupidity, but there is alas a sub-basement under them and several floors of parking.

A commenter on HuffPo yesterday said that all we need to do is send in Marines with really big vacuums. IT’S OBVIOUS, PEOPLE!

The only thing that matters is that he did a movie with a bunch of blue hippies in it.

He also made a strong statement about the “dangers” of allowing a major corporation to develop cybernetic organisms that enslave humanity.

Obviously, he is no friend of free enterprise.

Hey, the Shakira thing does make sense. I mean, how is Shakira supposed to travel around Arizona? Carry ID? Have you seen the things she wears?

So basically, the Arizona “Where are your papers, citizen?” Law means that smokingly-hawt scantily-clad latinas with magic hips are not welcome. That’s a majot consideration, and there’s no one better to make that point than smokingly-hawt scantily-clad Shakira and her hips.

Comehuevos is the Mexican term for Teabaggers.

I first read that as corneholios.

On second thought…

A commenter on HuffPo yesterday said that all we need to do is send in Marines with really big vacuums.

Did somebody call my name?

I’m still geeking out to everybody’s music comments in the last thread.

In other news, Michele Bachmann converts to communism.

http://videocafe.crooksandliars.com/heather/michele-bachmann-criticizes-obama-administ

Sorry, got distracted by Shakira.

Anyways – exactly the same as the James Cameron thing. Shakira is clearly the world’s foremost expert on being a scantily clad Colombian who is totes RAWR!!! hawt and with hips that move like something plugged directly into the libido of the human race.

I mean, how is Shakira supposed to travel around Arizona? Carry ID? Have you seen the things she wears?

In her cleavage?

I mean, how is Shakira supposed to travel around Arizona? Carry ID? Have you seen the things she wears?

In her cleavage?

That sounds like it would chafe. I must have some lotion around here somewhere…

Even Shakira lies, her hips don’t.

I mean, how is Shakira supposed to travel around Arizona? Carry ID? Have you seen the things she wears?

Tattooed to her ass?

In her cleavage?

In the interests of fairness and equality, I volunteer to test that proposition.

But SRSLY, we’re talking Shakira here. The only ID that would fit in her cleavage would be some RFID fob. Girl has small titties. Plus with the way she moves – nothing’s going to stay in place very long.

So…they don’t want someone from the outside (Free Market!) helping out, and they don’t want Obama (Government Takeover!) helping out and they refuse to even classify this mess as an Act of God (God would never do such a thing!)…

…so I guess my question is, “Why are even bothering to listen to these idiots?”

Girl has small titties

But you’d still look if she flashed them.

That sounds like it would chafe. I must have some lotion around here somewhere…

Get back to work, you. You have a deadine.

Get back to work, you. You have a deadline.

I know.

Plus with the way she moves – nothing’s going to stay in place very long.

Dress tape!

Or, you know, a handbag.

But you’d still look if she flashed them.

I’d look even if she didn’t flash ’em.

“‘Charles Hoy’s Fort.’”

Chester’s blanket fort with a TV and hookers made Blanket Magazine. 😉

It’s just fine if someone like Tom Clancy works with the Pentagon though.

http://www.public-action.com/911/clancy.html

(BTW, not to endorse Spare Changers….)

So, D-KW – I was just wondering; you have any thoughts about Shakira?

So, D-KW – I was just wondering; you have any thoughts about Shakira?

I think he might have a little crush on her…

I think he might have a little crush on her…

Of course. He’s looking for a girl nothing like his mother.

Of course. He’s looking for a girl nothing like his mother.

Well, she is in shape and has a full head of hair…

wev guys. My interest in Shakira is strictly pure and untarnished by things not related to sex.

OHNOES! FLESH EATING COCAINE!

As if coke didn’t make you paranoid enough…

Well, she is in shape and has a full head of hair…

Hey now! She’s aerodynamic!

OHNOES! FLESH EATING COCAINE!

NASTY. This is why I stick with weed. And Ritalin.

BTW, do you know how nerdy it feels to turn down coke because you’re worried it’s cut with aspirin and you’ll go into anaphylactic shock?

Not that I’ve personally experienced that or anything.

Hey now! She’s aerodynamic!

Who? Shakira, or DKW’s mom?

DKW wants to get together with Shakira to do some Bible studyin’. Why are your minds always in the gutter?

DKW’s mom?

This, and I can’t understate the importance of speed in certain activities.

I am a graduate student in shimmydynamics, and, I would like to request that after your prayer meeting DKW, could you tell her to call me? I think she could help me with my thesis.

Hey now! She’s aerodynamic!

Every time I go to the barber’s I’m hairodynamic.

This, and I can’t understate the importance of speed in certain activities.

Like cramming for a test?

Like cramming for a test?

Especially the Wasserman.

Every time I go to the barber’s I’m hairodynamic.

What is this “barber” of which you speak?

Especially the Wasserman.

Had to look this up. I’m a bit slow on the uptake this afternoon, I think.

Dumyati said that the skin problem is treatable, but “if you stop using cocaine, most of the cases would get better.”

How much shit do you do in life where folks say “but if you stop…” as if it was that easy? Also too, is levamisole the new paraquat?

Had to look this up.

It’s less of a deal now with real antibiotics.

It’s less of a deal now with real antibiotics.

Well, it also took me five minutes to catch on to your comment about aerodynamics, so I’m still not off the hook.

I don’t believe they’d ask someone responsible for the Terminator movies to do anything important.

Shakira can inject herself onto any of my policies.

And even after you’ve had the injection, I’d still take it. Over and over. (See what I do here? YAYESS)

And even after you’ve had the injection, I’d still take it.

Sloppy Shakironds?

Sloppy Shakironds?

However I can get it.

This Lori chick is a whore, I’ve decided.

So, I somehow doubt that he was, it being a brainstorming session and all.

Boy oh boy you got him real good there! LOLFMAORHZZ!! That’s some pretty good grade school playground insulting there, Lori. Nice. Over and over. Sentence fragments. Awesome. Journalism. Just like that. Also.

Conservatives shouldnt try to be witty. It never ends well.

Dumyati said that the skin problem is treatable, but “if you stop using cocaine, most of the cases would get better.”

This reminds me of story they told me in grade school on one of the filmstrip things where had to play the cassette and advance to the next frame when the narrator was interrupted with a loud “boooop” sound.

“Like this guy I know, right? He knows a guy, who smoked weed, and he saw bridge to the moon and fell out of his window naked and then kicked all the windows out of the buildings naked! Don’t do drugs kids, you’ll DIE!”

Fuckers.

This Lori chick is a whore, I’ve decided.

her nym is Snarkandboobs, so yes.

It’s just fine if someone like Tom Clancy works with the Pentagon though.

He gave a presentation to NSA rank-&-file once. People listened patiently and didn’t laugh.

Aliens of the Abyss. And for whatever it’s worth, Cameron has developed and helped develop a number of ROV mechanisms, mostly but not limited to film equipment. He’s not exactly some goofball with a Lego set going “Hey, what if we just dump golf balls into the hole? Will that work?”

her nym is Snarkandboobs, so yes.

What if her nym were Boobsandsnark?

What if her nym were Boobsandsnark?

Sluttier.

Put it this way: I’m told her Twitter nym only includes half of that malalogism. You tell me which half…

Conservatives shouldnt try to be witty. It never ends well.

They think they’re witty, but they’re only half right….

…..

BAAAHHHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAaaaa ok.

her nym is Snarkandboobs, so yes.

Really??? Must. not. click. thru…..

Illusionary?

Put it this way: I’m told her Twitter nym only includes half of that malalogism. You tell me which half…

“And”?

Actually, it’s fitting, because she is a boob. Just not in a good way.

Cameron has developed and helped develop a number of ROV mechanisms, mostly but not limited to film equipment.

He has a master rating, if I’m not mistaken, on the Benthos ROV line.

Benthos was one of the earliest ROV operators working for…wait for it…oil drilling companies!

“r nym is Snarkandboobs, so yes.”

that’s a classic attention-whore technique.

i>Don’t do drugs kids, you’ll DIE!”

When I returned home from college on break my first year my mom came to me and said “Don’t do cocaine!”
“Why?” I asked.
She then told me her story of going to the ENT to get a cortisone shot in her sinuses. To numb the area she was asked to snort some coke on one of those long wooden Q-Tips. So full of antihistamines and other stuff she went into full respiratory arrest in the doctor’s office. Obviously, they were able to revive her.
“So don’t do cocaine, it could kill you!” she finished.
“I think I’m in the clear,” I replied, having had my first tastes of blow a few months earlier.

It was always a blast for her to go into the hospital.
“Allergies?”
“Yes, vitamin K and cocaine,” said the white haired old lady. My mom rocked.

tag fail. Time to go home.

Annnnnnnnnnnnd, cue the nutcases…

Annnnnnnnnnnnd, cue the nutcases…

I love that site for the entertainment value alone.

“Yes, vitamin K and cocaine,”
You have not told us how she discovered the ketamine allergy.

You have not told us how she discovered the ketamine allergy.

She broke out after attending a stand-up show by Borscht Belt komiks.

Snarkandboobs

Jesus Mary and Joseph and His Sacred Tubesock. All of a sudden, I find myself disgusted by both concepts. I’m off to join a gay monastery, folks.

I’m off to join a gay monastery

Is there any other kind?

I’m off to join a gay monastery

Enjoy the beer and brats.

Enjoy the beer and brats.

OK, I think I see what you did there….

I’m off to join a gay monastery

Dude, PLEASE take the crusty tubesocks with you this time.

vitamin K and cocaine

add whiskey, and it’s the Breakfast of Champions!

FWIW, “Crusty Tubesock” would be a terrible name for a rock group! ewww

Enjoy the beer and brats.

OK, I think I see what you did there….

And if you look to your left, you’ll see a whole new thing he did there…

vitamin K and cocaine

add whiskey, and it’s the Breakfast of Champions!

Drunk, paranoid, and clotting.

I see what you do here, Z-man.

nd if you look to your left, you’ll see a whole new thing he did there…

eeew, now who’s going to clean that up? It’s not going to be me!

I think it’s hysterical that an entire political movement devoted to deifying Ronald Reagan – and relentlessly exaggerating his meagre accomplishments – ever has the gall to poke fun at “Hollywood liberals” merely because they are perceived to be “Hollywood liberals” by people who seem to think “Sands of Iwo Jima” and “The Green Berets” are documentaries.

eeew, now who’s going to clean that up? It’s not going to be me!

It is NOT my turn this time, no matter how much vodka you try to bribe me with.

Yeah. And if I’m not mistaken, St. Ronnie was one of those “Hollywood Liberals” to begin with. I was always under the impression that he changed his views in the name of political expediency. Have I got this completely wrong?

Oh, I love it; someone in the comments actually pointed out the fact that James Cameron has some honest-to-Eywa relevant expertise with deepwater ROV operations. The response? Some snark about the commentor’s name and the line “schools [sic.] out!”

Damn those pesky facts, with their evil liberal bias–they’re stubborn things.

I was always under the impression that he changed his views in the name of political expediency. Have I got this completely wrong?

Partly. He was pretty much a DINO, having supplied the HUAC names of “red” actors while SAG President, and even endorsed Eisenhower and Nixon (in 1960) prior to switching parties.

So it wasn’t so much political expediency as much as the Democratic party had begun its shift leftward that drove him out.

Oil Vey?

Oil be Damned?

You Be Oilin?

No, he started out as a New Deal supporter and changed his politics halfway through, later saying “I didn’t leave the Democrats, the Democrats left me.”

Which is weapons-grade bullshit; no New Deal Democrat would have advocated cutting taxes on the rich by forty percent, nor would they have approved of union busting, nor of the complete deregulation he presided over. Since he couldn’t even man up and explain why he changed his politics without lying, yes, I’m fairly sure it was political expediency.

no New Deal Democrat would have advocated cutting taxes on the rich by forty percent

Uhhhh, that’s precisely what JFK ended up doing….

Reagan’s switch to conservative politics seems to me to be very much the cynical move of a man who craved political power and chose conservatism because he was smart enough to see how much easier it is to manipulate people who vote conservative. Reagan was also smart enough to realize that his talents and appeal were more compatible with fooling consrvatives than they were with trying to stick with his old beliefs.

Wedge-issue politicians are not only inherently inferior to progressive politicans, they are also inherently lazier.

Partly. He was pretty much a DINO, having supplied the HUAC names of “red” actors while SAG President, and even endorsed Eisenhower and Nixon (in 1960) prior to switching parties.

Ike and Nixon were both Keynesians who were pretty much in line with the post-New Deal consensus, so that’s not actually unreasonable. What is is that he made his political debut campaigning for Goldwater, the original movement conservative candidate, in 1964. Among other things, he attacked “the soup kitchen of the welfare state,” i.e. exactly what Democrats since FDR had always stood for.

(He was also a race-baiter from the start, calling the Civil Rights Act “humiliating to the South” and running against the Fair Housing Act. Good man, Saint Reagan).

Dude, PLEASE take the crusty tubesocks with you this time.

I ended up with a whole laundry basket full of those after a Shakira video marathon.

Uhhhh, that’s precisely what JFK ended up doing….

Cutting from ninety to seventy wasn’t quite the act of radicalism that cutting them down to thirty was, I’d argue. (I’d also argue that cutting taxes isn’t inherently a bad thing; what is a bad thing is when tax cuts become a policy objective in and of themselves, which they weren’t before Reagan).

But in either case, that departure from the New Deal isn’t what Reagan was arguing against, he wanted more of it – so the argument that the Democrats didn’t leave Reagan stands.

I think Reagan’s shameful practice of spying on SAG members for the FBI when he was the president of that organization should – by itself – disqualify him from any hero worship, Mount Rushmore additions, currency honors, etc., even if he had been a good president.

I ended up with a whole laundry basket full of those after a Shakira video marathon.

I really didn’t need to know that.

A whole laundry basket, though? I’m impressed. How long was the marathon?

I think Reagan’s shameful practice of spying on SAG members for the FBI when he was the president of that organization should – by itself – disqualify him from any hero worship, Mount Rushmore additions, currency honors, etc., even if he had been a good president.

Well, conservatives tend to think that McCarthy was some sort of hero, so I doubt that’s going to sway them against Reagan.

it was Nancy. She was from a winger family and once Ron married her she introduced him to all her RW buddies. They”converted” him, which wasn’t hard a he wasn’t the sharpest person.

On the other hand, I heard from a deaf friend that to a deaf person used to reading facial expressions, it was clear RR didn’t believe everything he was saying, so I dunno…

it was Nancy. She was from a winger family and once Ron married her she introduced him to all her RW buddies. They”converted” him, which wasn’t hard a he wasn’t the sharpest person.

Didn’t know that, it explains a lot.

(She was also into astrology, which is a strange hobby for what was supposed to be a president of strong Christian values…)

But wouldn’t Eisenhower be considered a liberal by today’s standards? Didn’t he rail against the military industrial complex?

A whole laundry basket, though? I’m impressed. How long was the marathon?

I made it through She Wolf and had to stop due to blistering.

I made it through She Wolf and had to stop due to blistering.

I’m not sure if I’m disgusted or impressed…

I made it through She Wolf and had to stop due to blistering.

Okay, no longer impressed. You know, they do make, you know, substances that, like, lubricate in order to prevent chafing.

Okay, no longer impressed. You know, they do make, you know, substances that, like, lubricate in order to prevent chafing.

No DVR, song started, no time to go get lubrication. I did learn my lesson, however. Check it

That’s not me, but I found this strategy to be pure fucking genius.

That’s a great picture of John Edwards and his brother, isn’t it?

That’s a great picture of John Edwards and his brother, isn’t it?

Are you high again?

I’m not sure if I’m disgusted or impressed…

It’s ok to be both. Those aren’t mutually exclusive or unwarranted responses.

Are you high again?

You mean STILL? Yes. Wait, no. Don’t tell anyone. How can you tell? Does everyone know? FUCK. I have to go now.

That’s not me, but I found this strategy to be pure fucking genius.

The pump lube is the best. The bottle doesn’t go flying out of your slippery hands…I mean, not that I would know…

You mean STILL? Yes. Wait, no. Don’t tell anyone. How can you tell? Does everyone know? FUCK. I have to go now.

I’m just jealous. And broke.

They should add Steve Jobs! And Gary Kurzweil, Malcolm Gladwell, the Segway guy and other such “visionaries”. They could call it The Arrogant Douchebag League of America!

But wouldn’t Eisenhower be considered a liberal by today’s standards? Didn’t he rail against the military industrial complex?

RINO, for sure.

I don’t think you can really map him onto the modern US, because he lived in a fundamentally different world. Both sides assumed the government was made up of capable, competent people who could improve the general welfare. Both sides also thought that levying taxes to pay for public programs was an appropriate thing to do.

These days, those are radical leftist positions in the US, but at the time, they were just the rules that both sides agreed to before starting the debate.

I don’t think you can really map him onto the modern US, because he lived in a fundamentally different world. Both sides assumed the government was made up of capable, competent people who could improve the general welfare. Both sides also thought that levying taxes to pay for public programs was an appropriate thing to do.

Closest to today’s Democrat. To his credit, his experiences with war left him not actually wanting another fucking war, unlike the current crop of scumbag neocons who think that people are just things that you can buy and sell and kill at will.

OT, I got you sumpin, T&U*.

*Twas you gwan on wit at t’udder day, wernit?

The pump lube is the best. The bottle doesn’t go flying out of your slippery hands…I mean, not that I would know…

I know what you mean–very hazardous to the eyes. Plus you can get that gallon jug for super cheap at the walmart! (I refuse to capitalize walmart).

OT story I had to share…

I’m driving in my supermegabadass Corolla through the mean streets of Spokane, Washington, minding my own business when…

The dumb bitch driving the vehicle ahead of me decides she’d like to change lanes. Normally this would be acceptable behavior, but in this case there was another vehicle occupying the space she intended to occupy. In this dimension, that isn’t possible yet. So I lay on the horn, trying to stop her from doing that, because all the dumb bitch in the other car can do is stare in horror at the approaching vehicle.
So dumb bitch number one jerks the wheel and corrects herself in her own lane, and what does she fucking do? FLIPS ME OFF! WTF? I give up.

Had to have been a fucking Republican.

Oh, yeah, who’s yer daddy, thread? Huh? Yeah. You like that, dontcha?

Say all the nice things about Cameron you want but the SOB made Celine Dion famous and Linda Hamilton cry.

Fucking monster if ya ask me!

Musta been on cellphones. I think most shitty driving behavior is caused by cells.

Say all the nice things about Cameron you want

Thinking…thinking…

Wow. This post from Irky is downright surreal:

People on the right often look at corporations and this administration and see an administration hostile to the free market. Therefore, we defend the corporations.

It is natural and it should be the default. At the same time, however, we should be willing to point out the massive ties between British Petroleum and the Obama Administration.

Yeah, you do that, genius; go right ahead and raise the issue of petrochemical giants having undue influence over governmental policy. I’m sure it won’t backfire horribly on the GOP or anything.

From the same link:

Unlike most divorces, this one is coming with Eric Holder throwing around the words “criminal prosecution”? For what exactly?

Certainly if there was criminal misconduct, let’s prosecute.

So, uh, yea or nay?

Clancy Quote

“Four planes? That many people willing to die for the same cause at the same time? If any writer had turned in a story like this, the publisher would have just handed it back and said, ‘No way. Not believable.’ ”

It is if the author examines the psychology and motivations, of the the hijackers, how they were manipulated by their leaders, and how MOST of them did not KNOW the planes were going to be crashed into buildings!

A good author could write a convincing book about hijackers of 4 airplanes.

Say all the nice things about Cameron you want

Thinking…thinking…

He’s given work to and made money for a few good actors.

He’s given work to and made money for a few good actors.

You know, I really enjoyed Aliens. And the first Terminator.

“(She was also into astrology, which is a strange hobby for what was supposed to be a president of strong Christian values…)”

Religion = Occultism: if you believe in a Magical Guy who is in charge of everything, you believe in the Occult. Stuff like astrology and Kabbalah and God Knows What for Islam is just a less respectable facet of their Magical Thinking.

“…number one jerks the wheel and corrects herself in her own lane, and what does she fucking do? FLIPS ME OFF! WTF?”

But the woman you saved probably blew you a kiss, or something. I’m sure she remembers you fondly.

Paint Obama blue and ram him into an iceberg. Oh, Gavin.

Good grief:

A technician involved in the effort said that the wire saw had cut less than halfway through the riser when it stopped being effective. The technician, who spoke on condition of anonymity because he was not authorized to comment on the work, said that it appeared that there was other material in the riser — including, perhaps, some of the objects pumped into the well during the failed “top kill” procedure last week — that was dulling the saw.

I say we drop Irky, Cheney, Rush, and the Pantload into the thing; their combined tonnage should be enough to plug the leak.

Far be it from me to connect dots and come up with a thoroughly sleazy story to ‘splain the whole Reagan switch from Dem to Rep, but here goes.

Allegedly, according to rumor that may never, at this late date, even come close to being amenable to corroboration, Nancy Davis was a star-struck girl chafing under the unrelenting horror of living with her [adoptive] father, Loyal Davis, a noted neurosurgeon, crackpot, racist, reactionary control freak and general nutcase (hence the specialty in neuro, I would surmise). She decided that escaping his oppression would be easier if she were a Hollywood star, so she set out, with dedication and fervor, to make that happen.

By developing what was apparently a world-class talent at fellatio.

Beats learning how to act, I suppose, plus the notion that there was never going to be enough makeup and plastic surgery on the planet to make her a serious threat to Ava Gardner.

Peter Lawford once said he kept her number in his address book because you just never knew when you’d need the services of someone who was miles above the pros. A few years before his death, he told his wife that it was he who had suggested to a movie director that Nancy be brought in as a mood consultant for his nervous star, Ronald Reagan, who was facing an anxiety-inducing scene on his current project. Lo, her consultancy did the trick: he reported back to the set (goes the legend) much, MUCH calmer.

That was when the trouble started. Nancy, having seen a side of the affable, not entirely aware-seeming future President that few could claim to have witnessed, went bananas (and for once, the expression is grimly appropriate). She fell for him exactly like you would think a woman with such broad experience of men wouldn’t and engineered or maneuvered or manipulated or whatever you wish to call it her way into having an affair with him.

Whereupon she conveniently neglected her birth control.

There was absolutely no possible question of abortion, she told the (one may imagine at least mildly traumatized) future leader of the free world; it violated whatever principles she had left after becoming the go-to blow queen of Tinseltown. And, she may or may not have added disarmingly, have you met my father, who could twist off your balls, theoretically, with nothing more than the tie from a bag of Wonder Bread?

At least one rumormonger says he spent the night before his wedding at a former lover’s house, sobbing into her lap that he’d completely fucked up his entire life, but it didn’t really matter since it was all over anyhow.

Some Hollywoodites were apparently surprised that the future St. Ronnie was even elected to the presidency of SAG, as they had thought his politics far, FAR too leftist to make him a risk-free candidate. If that’s true, it could explain him rolling over and showing his throat to HUAC: there were plenty of political skeletons in his own closet, and better, you know, Dalton Trumbo than him.

So how’d he get to be such a conservative?

Well, what do YOU think ten years’ worth of twice-a-week family dinners with a vicious reactionary racist who happens to be your father-in-law would do to you? You’d never even be able to challenge him on anything lest the little woman start telling stories about you to the man with the skill with the twist-tie offa the bread bag.

If any of this is true, it tends to support things like the idea that he had a pretty fair coke habit and developed brain rot early.

I say we drop Irky, Cheney, Rush, and the Pantload into the thing; their combined tonnage should be enough to plug the leak.

Honestly, you don’t need to justify this course of action..

Closest to today’s Democrat.

Yeah, but the original question was “wasn’t he a liberal”? That’s a harder one to answer. By many people’s standards, the current Democratic party isn’t liberal, so there’s that. Eisenhower was probably more gung-ho on Keynesianism than the modern Democratic party, and more willing to tax, but probably he wasn’t keen on unions, and I’d be surprised to learn that he held positions on social issues that we would find palatable.

Of course, these days Goldwater would be a RINO for being pro-choice and Bush fils is a “socialist”. The wingnuts are just crazy, is all.

Rock ‘n’ Roll High School!

tsam said,

I’m driving in my supermegabadass Corolla through the mean streets of Spokane, Washington, minding my own business when…

Lozer! I haz a Honda Civic, lol.
~

I learned a long time ago to take my professional problems to professionals. Cameron can’t fuck it up any worse than it is right now. The Simpleton Brigade doesn’t ever seem to figure that out. WRT Ronnie Raygunz, any former union officer that would go ahead and kill an entire union should be put on life support and kept conscious, just to keep him alive longer while painful actions are forced upon him.
The old scumbag is right there with BigDick Nixon, odious rat bastard of the later 20th century. I would have gone to his funeral just to put a mirror under his nose AND poke him in the cheek with a hatpin. Have to make sure everyone else on the planet was safe from his evil grasp.

what does she fucking do? FLIPS ME OFF!

I’m amazed she could even see you from the pilot’s seat of her (very likely) SUV.

Had to have been a fucking Republican.

In Spokane? What’re the odds?

Well, what do YOU think ten years’ worth of twice-a-week family dinners with a vicious reactionary racist who happens to be your father-in-law would do to you?

Not so very far from my own FIL. Possibly the saving grace for me (along with the fact that we never did dinner twice a week *shudder*) was that I could passive-aggressive comment with my equally liberal wife about what a jerk he was being on the ride home.

And now…the thread is mine, ALL MINE! HAHAHAHAHA, stupid libs!

Eat Halliburton/B.P. oil spill, Mr. Whale Chowder.

IF that is your real name!
~

Hah! My locality swarms with Lycra-clad bicyclists, especially on weekends. I’m okay with bicyclists – I want them to have fun and be safe, and also stay off the restricted single-track trails.

So one day I’m driving in my wee ancient Honda, and to get where I’m going, I have to take a residential street that’s on the way to the open space where mountain bikers roam happily, so there are usually lots of bicyclists, and mostly you can’t pass them because it’s a two lane road with poor sight lines. But it’s such a short stretch of road, so I don’t really care or get upset.

Two Lycra guys are riding their very fine bikes ahead of me, side-by-side, and kinda slow, so they can talk about their stock portfolios or whatever. They should actually be riding single-file, but heck, I didn’t have to be anywhere that fast, plus I was very curious to see whether they’d do this side-by-side slow cruise for the whole length of the road, even though they were well aware that I was creeping along behind them at a safe distance.

But alas, a huge SUV that just joined the slow parade behind me was impatient. Huge horn blast.

And the bicycle guys turned and yelled “Bitch!” at me, and flipped me off. I just started laughing, ’cause how on earth could they imagine that such a huge horn sound could come from my beat-up little Civic.

As for the oil spill, has anyone even called Procter & Gamble to ask for their help? I’m thinking about a giant tampon.

What? It’s a plan.

Also, too, on the wimpier more-badass-than-thou front I’ve got you all beat or will by 8:00 tomorrow morning, when I take posession of the 150cc scooter I’m buying for Mrs. Chowder’s birthday.

I am terrified of the ride through rush-hour traffic to my office where the pieces scooter will be stored until The Big Day. Your stories of stupid and/or impatient SUV drivers are not helping.

I wanted to title this “Obama, Starring in James Cameron’s The Oil Spill”, but the article doesn’t specify whether Obama was in attendance or not. So, I somehow doubt that he was, it being a brainstorming session and all. That’s not his forte, as he’s made painfully apparent. Over and over.

Over & over? Like when he turned America away from blazing full-speed-ahead down the road toward eating its own young alive in its ruins? Or just now, when he whacked yet another Al-Quaeda boss that Cheney’s Brush-Clearing Hand-Puppet couldn’t give a shit about for seven ugly years? Or just keeping his approval rating above 25% (hell if I know how exactly) in the most frightening, polarized & stressful period in most Americans’ living memory?

Yeah, he sure looks like a blithering dolt compared to that Rhodes Scholar he replaced right about now.

SMILE OF TEH DAY: if you think this is a worst-case scenario, just imagine how heinously Bush & his travelling freak-show of half-wit cronies would’ve fucked this mess up.

This isn’t just another Katrina, or another Bhopal, or another Exxon Valdez. The actions to mitigate those tragedies were well known (if ignored) before the UglyBall got rolling to begin with. No such luck this time. This is a situation for which there is NO KNOWN SOLUTION. Obama could have an IQ of 250, shoot unicorns out of his ass & have laser-firing eyeballs, & none of that would help one teeny tiny little bit.

Send James Cameron? Sure, why not. His deep-sea skills are perfect for this situation — & I’d love nothing more than seeing this wingnut slag & all her fellow troglodytes scarfing down a big plate of sizzling-hot crow pie as he gives BP & the Feds the means to save the day.

Heck, send ANYONE that has relevant know-how around the means to get to the leak &/or stop it from poisoning the Gulf to death – time is crucial right now, because one little hurricane can turn all those booms into an abstract-art homage to Christo very very quickly, not to mention playing hell with the drilling-schedule for a relief well. Send fucking Triumph The Insult Dog if the little dyspeptic neutered fucker has anything useful to offer. Any wingnut that baaaws about a lack of decorum or dignity at this point should be cordially invited to go die in a fire ASAP.

Snarkandboobs? No tits, just GTFO.

Whale Chowder, I am out there protecting you from the SUV wrath; me and my mighty mite Civic, holding the line against the descent into barbarism. Wait. Okay, so it’s not working. Tampon, anyone?

Sadly, tampons are not the solution to everything.

I’m thinking we should put Florida into a giant rubber.

Obama could have an IQ of 250, shoot unicorns out of his ass & have laser-firing eyeballs,

Wait, are you saying he doesn’t?

just imagine how heinously Bush & his travelling freak-show of half-wit cronies would’ve fucked this mess up.

Worst disaster movie EVER.

My locality swarms with Lycra-clad bicyclists

To quote the short-lived, long-ago Village Voice sports section the feeling of hot wet Lycra wrapped around my balls helped me understand why some people become perverts.

Hah! I’m posting at a three, no, wait, four-to-one ratio to all of the rest of you! Suck it, libs!

You can make a lot of chowder from one whale.

SMILE OF TEH DAY: if you think this is a worst-case scenario, just imagine how heinously Bush & his travelling freak-show of half-wit cronies would’ve fucked this mess up.

We’d have radioactive tarballs washing up on the beaches already. And Guadzilla also too, to steal a joke.

I thought it was speeled :”Chowduh”.
~

I’d like to paint Obama blue and ram him into my iceberg. If you know what I mean andIthinkyoudo…

In 2004 I kept a little survey in my car. Whenever I had an encounter with a rude driver I noted what bumper sticker that car had. The repukes “won” the most rude driver contest by more than 2-1, even though i live and work in a heavily democratic area.

But the single rudest, most self-absorbed bozo I saw that whole election year, the one that tied up six lanes of traffic on 4 roads during a weekend rush hour to make an illegal (and dangerous) u-turn rather than drive 1 block out of his way, was a Volvo with Kucinich stickers all over the back….

I thought it was speeled :”Chowduh”.

Only north and east of Hartford.

I’d like to paint Obama blue and ram him into my iceberg. If you know what I mean andIthinkyoudo…

You’re going to use him to make thousand island dressing for your salad?

I was wondering when Cameron would be consulted, or whoever it is that owns the manned submersibles that lurked around the Titanic, which is over twice as deep into the ocean as this gusher is. That doesn’t mean that anyone can do anything with the manned submersibles to fix this mess. For some reason, I find the thought of being able to send humans to the spot a comfort.

You’re going to use him to make thousand island dressing for your salad?

Oh, please. I’m a liberal. I never eat iceberg lettuce.* Only organic baby field greens and arugala.

*Actually, this is true. Iceberg lettuce is the White Castle of lettuces.

I’m a watercress man and I don’t care who knows.

Petard-Hoisting 101:

A commenter on Wonkette recently posted a most jocular link … now I’m certainly not encouraging anyone to spam it on any wingnut fora or blogs or anything, but gosh darn it all, there are much worse ways to get your twisted kicks on the Intertronz.

Iceberg lettuce is the White Castle of lettuces.

Arugula is theft.

You can make a lot of chowder from one whale.

Tell me about it.

Iceberg lettuce is the Jew of liberal saladism.

Coulda been worse. Coulda been Michael Bay.

Iceberg lettuce is crunchy and crisp and the perfect lettuce for tacos and tostadas and such. It is not so good the way it was fed to me as a child in the Mid-West decades ago: on a salad plate, in a wedge, dripping with International Orange Kraft French Dressing.

Heck, send ANYONE that has relevant know-how around the means to get to the leak &/or stop it from poisoning the Gulf to death

Yeah, you know, I’m just amazed that all our Big Oil politicians on the Right are absolutely silent about this.

Have we heard a single peep from Dick Cheney, former head of the nation’s biggest oilfield industrial contractor? No ideas? No volunteering for service on blue-ribbon panels? No photo ops leading clean-up efforts? No earnest offers to “lend a hand”?

How about Mr. “I know how to run an oil-bidness” George W. Bush? How about our nation’s foremost expert on the oil and gas industry, Sarah Palin?

It’s not that I expect them to do anything constructive. It’s not that I even want them meddling. But I am really surprised that they aren’t even PRETENDING to lend a hand, even in a symbolic self-serving way. Really, the silence is deafening. It’s like they’re going “Oil spill? Me? I don’t know nuthin’ about oil!”

I give props, at least, to Bush and Cheney for keeping their mouths shut and not criticizing. Palin, OTOH – what a fucking asshole. Miss “Oil Industry Expert” and all she’s doing is standing on the sidelines going “See? Toldja so, Greenies! Nya Nya!”

Hah! I’m posting at a three, no, wait, four-to-one ratio to all of the rest of you! Suck it, libs!

pfft. You were nowhere to be seen last night when I singlehandedly killed that thread.

Iceberg lettuce…on a salad plate, in a wedge, dripping with International Orange Kraft French Dressing.

How about on a salad plate, in a wedge, dripping with blue cheese dressing and bacon bits?

well, me and a fair amount of cheap rum.

Zombie Thread Killa will eat yur brainz if not granted proper cred.
~

You were nowhere to be seen last night when I singlehandedly killed that thread.

Undead zombie has unsleeping advantage. I make do with what I have.

Wev. All my best jokes ate when the thread is deeeeaaaaaaad. Which is worse than killing it.

How about on a salad plate, in a wedge, dripping with blue cheese dressing and bacon bits?

Oh god. Nevermind Shakira, I’ll be in my bunk.

on a salad plate, in a wedge dripping with International Orange Kraft French Dressing

Salad plate? Fancy.

Did you ever have the “layer salad”? Why do Midwesterners love “salads” so much?

Midwesterners love their salads from the salad bar at Applebee’s because they feel more connected to their non-pretentious authenticity that I just made up and pulled from my ass.

Did you ever have the “layer salad”?

I don’t know what it was called but my mom made this…thing…with green jell-o, mayo and shredded carrot and put it on a leaf of iceberg.

It was not as good as the lettuce, bleu cheese and bacon stuff mentioned above.

It’s not that I expect them to do anything constructive. It’s not that I even want them meddling. But I am really surprised that they aren’t even PRETENDING to lend a hand, even in a symbolic self-serving way. Really, the silence is deafening.

Optics uber alles! If you’re seen on the boob-tube in proximity to the black goo, the couch-potatos at home might unconsciously associate YOU with that sinister cloud of toxic death … that can really play hell with profits from the book-tours & the fund-raising, y’know.

Plus it probably smells icky, & worst of all, you might get your designer shoes dirty! Now THAT would be a real tragedy.

Miss “Oil Industry Expert” and all she’s doing is standing on the sidelines going “See? Toldja so, Greenies! Nya Nya!

Yeah, because this sort of disaster would be such a BREEZE in tundra that’s now unstable glop for much of the year, & where there might or might not even be one shitty little access-road in or out … you betcha!

Shorter Palin: let them eat benzene.

I don’t know what it was called but my mom made this…thing…with green jell-o, mayo and shredded carrot and put it on a leaf of iceberg

Yeah, that’s just “Jello salad” and it comes in an infinite number of iterations.

This is a later of iceberg with a layer of Miracle Whip, a layer of frozen peas, a layer of chopped ham, some more MW, and shredded cheese.

Actually, it’s not so bad comparatively.

Those people are all about the extraction. As BP just showed so ably, no oil company executive or hanger-on could possibly predict that anything could go wrong with the process.

Why bother preparing for something that’ll never happen?

How about on a salad plate, in a wedge, dripping with blue cheese dressing and bacon bits?
Still on about Shakira I see.

…a layer of Miracle Whip…

Are you kidding me? I thought my family was the only one that used Miracle Whip instead of mayo. Everybody I know looked at me like I had two heads when I used MW on my sammiches. I finally gave up and went over to the mayo side when Mrs. Chowder was buying MW for me only and the rest of the lil’ Chowderheads were all eating real mayo.

Aren’t “Greenies” some sort of dog treat?

What a fucking whore.

What a fucking whore.

Is this an example of your “best jokes?”

Dude. For the longest time, I thought MW WAS mayonnaise. Nobody else I knew ate real mayo. I think I was a teenager before I had real mayonnaise. Or butter, come to think of it.

Is this an example of your “best jokes?”

Um, no. Just internalized misogyny and alcoholic slushieness. I’m actually ashamed I took the time to post it.

Is this an example of your “best jokes?”

Sorry, that was just mean.

Musta been on cellphones. I think most shitty driving behavior is caused by cells.

It sure looked like a cell phone induced fuckup. I was just stunned that this crazy bitch would flip ME off after I woke her dumb ass up and stopped her from crashing her fucking car! WTF?

Morris: Obama doesn’t have a clue
By Dick Morris – 06/01/10 07:03 PM ET

Conservatives are so enraged at Obama’s socialism and radicalism that they are increasingly surprised to learn that he is incompetent as well. The sight of his blithering and blustering while the most massive oil spill in history moves closer to America’s beaches not only reminds one of Bush’s terrible performance during Katrina, but calls to mind Jimmy Carter’s incompetence in the face of the hostage crisis.

America is watching the president alternate between wringing his hands in helplessness and pointing his finger in blame when he should be solving the most pressing environmental problem America has faced in the past 50 years. We are watching generations of environmental protection swept away as marshes, fisheries, vacation spots, recreational beaches, wetlands, hatcheries and sanctuaries fall prey to the oil spill invasion. And, all the while, the president acts like a spectator, interrupting his basketball games only to excoriate BP for its failure to contain the spill.

The political fallout from the oil spill will, indeed, spill across party and ideological lines. The environmentalists of America cannot take heart from a president so obviously ignorant about how to protect our shores and so obstinately arrogant that he refuses to inform himself and take any responsibility.

All of this explains why the oil spill is seeping into his ratings among Democrats, dragging him down to levels we have not seen since Bush during the pit of the Iraq war. Conservatives may dislike Obama because he is a leftist. But liberals are coming to dislike him because he is not a competent progressive.

Meanwhile, the nation watches nervously as the same policies Obama has brought to our nation are failing badly and publicly in Europe. When Moody’s announces that it is considering downgrading bonds issued by the government of the United States of America, we find ourselves, suddenly, in deep trouble. We have had deficits before. But never have they so freaked investors that a ratings agency considered lowering its opinion of our solvency. Not since Alexander Hamilton assumed the states’ Revolutionary War debt has America’s willingness and ability to meet its financial obligations been as seriously questioned.

And the truth begins to dawn on all of us: Obama has no more idea how to work his way out of the economic mess into which his policies have plunged us than he does about how to clean up the oil spill that is destroying our southern coastline.

Both the financial crisis and the oil come ever closer to our shores — one from the east and the other from the south — and, between them, they loom as a testament to the incompetence of our government and of its president.

And, oddly, to his passivity as well. After pursuing a remarkably activist, if misguided and foolhardy, agenda, Obama seems not to know what to do and finds himself consigned to the roles of observer and critic.

America is getting the point that its president doesn’t have a clue.

He doesn’t know how to stop the oil from spilling. He is bereft of ideas about how to create jobs in the aftermath of the recession. He has no idea how to keep the European financial crisis contained. He has no program for repaying the massive debt hole into which he has dug our nation without tax increases he must know will only deepen the pit.

Some presidents have failed because of their stubbornness (Johnson and Bush-43). Others because of their character flaws (Clinton and Nixon). Still others because of their insensitivity to domestic problems (Bush-41). But now we have a president who is failing because he is incompetent. It is Jimmy Carter all over again.

Who would have thought that this president, so anxious to lead us and so focused on his specific agenda and ideas, would turn out not to know what he is doing?

In Spokane? What’re the odds?

Geez, 30 to 1? Just a guess based on the lifelong feeling that I’m surrounded by dudes with their pants pulled up way too high, bitching at me to get a haircut, and looking with a suspicious eye at all of those negroes migrating up from California…It’s just accepted reality here. White is right and my little fantasy of self reliance is real if just believe it hard enough.

Some Presidents failed because of their stubbourness (Bush 43, Johnson), some failed because of deep character flaws and corruption (Nixon, Clinton) but Obama? He’s like Jimmy Carter, failing due to sheer incompetence. Even liberals hate him now.

WTF?

Jealousy.

Your awesome badass Corolla turned her instantly green.

I don’t know what it was called but my mom made this…thing…with green jell-o, mayo and shredded carrot and put it on a leaf of iceberg

Yeah, that’s just “Jello salad” and it comes in an infinite number of iterations.

I saw something like that in a restaurant once, and thought “I’m not falling for that. No way.”

Some Presidents failed because…

So why was Reagan such a total failure, there, Mr. Failure … uh… expert?

And this oil spill isn’t so much “Obama’s Katrina”, rather, it is Obama’s Iranian hostage crisis. Just like the hostages showed Carter for the shallow, incompetent, moron he was, so shall this disaster do to Obama.

RE: the giant sea tampon and the notable absence of all things Cheney of late – I posted on both a few days ago. Today’s topic is the irrefutable photographic evidence that Richard Cohen is indeed a demented, chinless beaver.

Actually, tsam, I think it has come to pass that many people’s default response to any sudden, unexpected, startling event is “Fuck you”. Not “Huh?” or “Jeepers!” or “What happened?” or “OMG, is everything OK?” Them days, assumin they existed (and I think they did, at least in terms of the “Fuck you” not being automatic, and even being shocking), is gone.

I personally am one stubbour motherfucker.

Your awesome badass Corolla turned her instantly green.

Ah, you might be on to something there. Green Corolla = mooslim usurper ipasing sheria law on us amercians.

Actually, tsam, I think it has come to pass that many people’s default response to any sudden, unexpected, startling event is “Fuck you”. Not “Huh?” or “Jeepers!” or “What happened?” or “OMG, is everything OK?” Them days, assumin they existed (and I think they did, at least in terms of the “Fuck you” not being automatic, and even being shocking), is gone.

I don’t know, sometimes I make a dumb move in traffic too. When someone is up my ass about it, I’m so embarrassed that all I can do is shrug and say “sorry dude, my bad”.

Tomorrow I get to spend about 4 hours with the cutest, most adorable goldendoodle because his people are working or at school, and there are real estate people coming over to the house, so the huge lovable puppydog needs to be elsewhere. I am that elsewhere. This makes me happy.

And this spill could go on into 2012, for YEARS,creating entire “dead zones” right off the coast of the swing state of Florida…and Obama will be blamed…I LOVE it!

But yeah, your thoughts seem accurate. People do suddenly jump to hostility under stress. Kind of a good way to get your ass kicked.

Tomorrow I get to spend about 4 hours with the cutest, most adorable goldendoodle because his people are working or at school, and there are real estate people coming over to the house, so the huge lovable puppydog needs to be elsewhere. I am that elsewhere. This makes me happy.

Awww you lucky…I “get” to go to work and spend a day with an incompetent boss, an irritating asshole who whistles and snaps his fucking fingers non-stop (while doing essentially nothing), and a bunch of whineyassed contractors. Need help watching the dog?

Obama … Clue: You are repeating days-old comments made elsewhere.

this spill could go on into 2012, for YEARS,creating entire “dead zones” right off the coast of the swing state of Florida…and Obama will be blamed…I LOVE it!

gb2 fapping 2 “faces of death” on yr betamax plzkthx

Yeah, tsam, me too. I might do the one-handed facepalm (’cause the other hand must stay on the steering wheel) or raise my hand to indicate that I very much appreciate their forbearance during my time of brainlessness. And you know, when people who’ve just done dumb things make similar gestures of “sorry dude my bad” to me, it totally defuses the situation. O what we was, and what we become*.

*VRWR

and Obama will be blamed…I LOVE it!

Oh, ok. So we can go ahead and blame Bush for 9/11? For the over 3000 dead people? Wait, no? So what’s your deal, fool?

And this spill could go on into 2012, for YEARS,creating entire “dead zones” right off the coast of the swing state of Florida…and Obama will be blamed…I LOVE it!

Yes, the destruction of millions of square miles and the livelihoods of millions of people is all worth it if you can blame Obama, great patriot that you are.

So, it was okay when during Bush’s reign, Michael Crichton was called as a Congressional witness for a global warming debate. Or when Tom Clancy was tapped to give anti-terrorist-measures advice? Okay.

Yeah, tsam, me too. I might do the one-handed facepalm (’cause the other hand must stay on the steering wheel) or raise my hand to indicate that I very much appreciate their forbearance during my time of brainlessness. And you know, when people who’ve just done dumb things make similar gestures of “sorry dude my bad” to me, it totally defuses the situation. O what we was, and what we become*.

Yeah, I always remind myself that the dumb bastard who just did something stupid could have just as easily been me. Or it could have been the first dumb thing he/she has done in years. All that applies until I see a Bush or McCain bumper sticker. No mercy for you!

I killed Obama-Clue. It’s so fun.

gb2 fapping 2 “faces of death” on yr betamax plzkthx

HA! pwnd.

“Conservatives shouldnt try to be witty. It never ends well.”

Yeah, when they attempt to be funny, it’s creepy at best; stupid at worst. They are like that vine that wraps itself around other plant life; mimics the plant’s leaf/vine pattern so it resembles its host…all the while slowly strangling the plant to death.

So, it was okay when during Bush’s reign, Michael Crichton was called as a Congressional witness for a global warming debate. Or when Tom Clancy was tapped to give anti-terrorist-measures advice? Okay.

Along those lines, the craziest fucking thing I’ve ever heard is that Jeff “Skunk” Baxter of Steely Dan and The Doobs wound up consulting for the Pentagon.

I’m kind of impressed that the government is able to draw from such diverse sources.

Optics uber alles! If you’re seen on the boob-tube in proximity to the black goo, the couch-potatos at home might unconsciously associate YOU with that sinister cloud of toxic death … that can really play hell with profits from the book-tours & the fund-raising, y’know.

Hm. I must be st00pit or sumthn. All this time, I had no idea that exploiting a massive ecological disaster was lending a hand. I can totally see how doing more of the same thing is a superfantastic idea!

Just like the hostages showed Carter for the shallow, incompetent, moron he was, so shall this disaster do to Obama.

Right. Cause all that’s needed to fix this disaster is to bribe some Iranians to plug the well as soon as the Republican is elected.

Cause all that’s needed to fix this disaster is to bribe some Iranians

Heh. Also, how is it that the company that created the mess and is actually responsible for cleaning it up gets a pass with this moron?

Oh wait, answered my own question, didn’t I?

“Didn’t Winston Churchill consult with Ian Fleming about strategy during World War II?”

The WWII British intelligence unit “Magic Gang” headed up by magician Jasper Maskelyne pulled some of the most successful camouflage/counter-intel stunts ever–including “relocating” Alexandria and the Suez Canal…and fooling Rommel into thinking a few Allied tanks were a massive invasion.

Mmmm.. I just love the smell of dead thread at night.

Where’s that freaking zombie now, eh?

My work here is done.

“Jeff “Skunk” Baxter of Steely Dan and The Doobs wound up consulting for the Pentagon.”

Yum–Steely Dan.

But you guys, don’t you see?! We should only trust those wooley-headed Hollywood dreamer-types when they’re old senile boobs like Reagan or whatshisname from Law & Order.

Don’t be environmental girly-men, y’all: shrimp and oysters still abound in sundry seas.

Off to chafe the dragon…

Sorry, that was just mean.

Hey, no, it’s cool. It was actually an attempt at satire that went sideways, but I was too lazy to explain last night, and it was close enough to the ick line that I figured I’d just take it back.

But “Iceberg lettuce is the Jew of liberal saladism” is still making me laugh.

“Iceberg lettuce is the Jew of liberal saladism”

There’s Seth Iceberg, his brother Shlmuel, father Issac, sister Levee (see what I do there?)…

Morris: Obama doesn’t have a clue
By Dick Morris

There’s the blind leading the clueless if I ever saw it.

I don’t know what it was called but my mom made this…thing…with green jell-o, mayo and shredded carrot and put it on a leaf of iceberg

That’s practically Lutheran dessert!

But “Iceberg lettuce is the Jew of liberal saladism” is still making me laugh.

It still has me kicking myself that I didn’t think of it first.

That’s practically Lutheran dessert!

Protestant Midwesterners in general looooooooooove Jello salad. The best ones have the lettuce IN the Jello itself.

Check out Rush Limbaugh’s mom’s delicious Jello salad recipe. In her defense, I think those were supposed to be green olives. Don’t ask me how that makes it any better, though…

Has anyone noticed that the government didn’t seek any advice from my ex wife on this disaster? I guess they didn’t think that fucking whore had anything to say worth hearing.

It still has me kicking myself that I didn’t think of it first.

Don’t worry. There are always more “_____ is the Jew of liberal _____” jokes.

Morris: Obama doesn’t have a clue
By Dick Morris

Remind me, what’s Dick Morris an authority on again?

Remind me, what’s Dick Morris an authority on again?

Let’s see what Whackypedia says.

Doctor of Deadbeat: “Morris had been labeled as one of the biggest tax delinquents in his home state of Connecticut, owing an estimated $280,000 in unpaid taxes and a total of $452,367 in unpaid taxes and fees.[29][30] In 2003 the IRS filed a $1.5 million tax lien against him.”

With a side-order of GETTING IT WRNOG Jedi: “He authored Condi vs. Hillary (subtitled The next great presidential race) (ISBN 0-06-083913-9) in which he argues that only Condoleezza Rice could block Hillary Clinton’s anticipated 2008 bid for the White House. He co-authored this book with his wife, Eileen McGann.”

Not to mention a face & voice that are the epitome of Justifiable Homicide.

So yeah, perfect fodder for someone who gets his chub on over the possible prospect of the Gulf Coast returning to a Third World status. Dodos of a feather flock together & all that cal.