He’s got one fucking note and hits it for all its worth, doesn’t he?

Hey! Zrist!

Although the previous threedle was getting into the WAM/ building on fire fetishes, so it’s really no wonder anybody wants to torment this pathetic old codger.

“ultra-liberal Martha Coakley”

Oh, man, that is some funny shit!

Fortunately, white men will

allow me to introduce you to some interesting concepts called “the past” and “the future”

This article reminds me just how awesome it is to be the white man.

GOP priorities emphasize strengthening the military, illegal immigration, and moral breakdown.

The GOP wants to strengthen illegal immigration and moral breakdown?

“In his spare time he admires Norman Rockwell paintings, collects antiques, and is an avid soccer fan.”

GAY.

“Illegal is illegal,” said Pearce, a driving force on the issue in Arizona. “We’ll have less crime. We’ll have lower taxes. We’ll have safer neighborhoods. We’ll have shorter lines in the emergency rooms. We’ll have smaller classrooms.”

and ronald reagan will lower taxes, which will unleash an overwhelming tide of prosperity that will wipe out the deficit

Oh man this guy is a hoot: “Shortly after that, Obama announced the establishment of the White House Council on Women and Girls, an Orwellian gesture in light of the fact that boys are now lagging in nearly every respect”

Except for unimportant areas like income, wealth, representation in government, etc.

TruculentandUnreliable said,
April 23, 2010 at 23:37

“In his spare time he admires Norman Rockwell paintings, collects antiques, and is an avid soccer fan.”

GAY.

Not that there’s anything wrong with being gay. Norman Rockwell paintings and collecting antiques, those are a different matter.

White Man! To the rescue!!!

While it’s true that women represent 53% of the national electorate, it’s the 47% male vote that will make the difference on Election Day. That’s because historically, the female vote tends to split between the two parties, casting men as electoral tie-breakers.

So… while many women vote their conscience, many men are just wing-nugget block-voting assholes?

Not that there’s anything wrong with being gay. Norman Rockwell paintings and collecting antiques, those are a different matter.

This is not untrue. Those are just activities I would not expect from such a manly man.

“Shortly after that, Obama announced the establishment of the White House Council on Women and Girls, an Orwellian gesture in light of the fact that boys are now lagging in nearly every respect”

Did you catch the title? “Stiffed.” Hee hee.

and ronald reagan will lower taxes, which will unleash an overwhelming tide of prosperity that will wipe out the deficit

Followed by irrefutable scientific proof that the Earth is flat, despite the whining of lieberals.

A minority of women (43%) believe the federal government threatens personal rights and freedoms, whereas a majority of men (52%) express this worry.

Those men are particularly worried that the government is going to get in the way of their fundamental right to threaten the personal rights and freedoms of women.

I’m pleased that as a white, straight male, somebody has got my back. I’m tired of all the reverse racism and sexism I’ve suffered throughout my miserable life as a suburban white kid.

Followed by irrefutable scientific proof that the Earth is flat, despite the whining of lieberals.

The so-called “round Earth” theory is an area that illuminates liberalism’s “epistemic closure” far, far, far more than the Right’s.

A minority of women (43%) believe the federal government threatens personal rights and freedoms, whereas a majority of men (52%) express this worry.

Perhaps that’s because women, like union workers and minorities, owe their personal rights and freedom to the direct action of a federal government (the Nineteenth Amendment) pushed by progressive activism. That kind of thing does tend to give you a more positive view of such things, and a less positive view of the status quo.

As Kuhn notes, “Democrats saw an absent father who made a mess of the nation.

Try “Democrats saw a drunk and abusive father whose idea of parenthood was to stay up at night shooting the neighbors with ammunition paid for out of the children’s piggybank.”

But alas, Obama over-reached. While the $878 billion economic stimulus package was sold to the American public as a jobs bill, it was transmogrified

Leave Calvin and Hobbes out of this, you brainless invertebrate.

into a social service entitlement bill.

Well, a solid majority of citizens, according to your article, believe the government “doesn’t do enough to help average Americans,” so perhaps a social service entitlement bill was supposed to react to that. (Although, I think you and I have very different standards to measure what an “average American” is).

Then Obama became a stout defender of Wall Street and big business.

Hence their vigorous attempts to loosen regulation, no doubt. Oh. Wait. Fuck.

Liberals read the polling numbers, too. Indeed, they tremble at the prospect of a mass exodus of the white male electorate, 41% of whom voted for Barack Obama in 2008.

Well, I’m certainly trembling at the notion of the abusive father coming back with a firm intention to keep shooting the neighbors and paying for it with my piggybank. But let’s cut the bullshit about a “mass exodus of white male voters.” A majority of white male voters has voted Republican for the last thirty years at least, probably longer than that. This isn’t something new, and as America becomes less white, it’s probably getting less important, not more.

So Tea Partiers — men and women, Black and White, young and old. I have some words of counsel: Stand tall, stand proud. If the lamestream media resorts to sneering stereotypes of angry White males, take them to task for their shameful and classless demagoguery.

Also, the civil rights movement was a plot to enslave white Southerners. And feminists practice witchcraft. Which, when combined, caused Hurricane Katrina and the earthquake in Haiti. Honest.

TruculentandUnreliable said,
April 23, 2010 at 23:37

GAY.

He’s a bald church lady with flowery wallpaper in the kitchen and the Renaissance reminiscent Norman Rockwell plates. And a Jesus fish on her Ford Tempo.

ie, democracy would be so much more “correct” without all this allowing everybody but daddy to vote and shit.

Womens’ sports is theft. Title IX is nanny state. Don’t tread on White me. I hate stuff. Lots of stuff. Men rule, girlz drool. Lieberals is stupid with their grammer and shit. Sarah Palin is god except that she’s hobbled by choosing to be a dumb girl.

This is fun!

Liberals read the polling numbers, too. Indeed, they tremble at the prospect of a mass exodus of the white male electorate, 41% of whom voted for Barack Obama in 2008.

I’ll bet he has one of the t-shirts that says “Fish tremble at the mere mention of my name”, and he scratched out the fish and put “liberals and bitches”.

Womens’ sports is theft.

I really like the gymnasts, they can steal from me anytime.

If the lamestream media resorts to sneering stereotypes of angry White

you mean those orthographically challenged, teabag-festooned tailgate partiers whose view of american history seems to have been definitively formed by sitcoms and fabreeze commercials?

While it’s true that women represent 53% of the national electorate, it’s the 47% male vote that will make the difference on Election Day. That’s because historically, the female vote tends to split between the two parties, casting men as electoral tie-breakers.

That’s factually inaccurate. In 2008 women voted 56-43 for Dems. Men were 49-48. http://www.cnn.com/ELECTION/2008/results/polls/#USP00p1
This actually helps his argument that its all the fault of the bitches, but he has to compulsively lie about it anyway. And if white men voted only 41% for Obama, exactly how much worse can it get?

White men are overrepresented (relative to their normal over-representation) in midterm elections, so he is right about that.1994 was also the Year of the Angry White Male.

I wonder if this is somehow related to the fact that nearly every single other demographic group votes the other way.

media resorts to sneering stereotypes of angry White males, take them to task for their shameful and classless demagoguery.

And ferkristsake, be SURE to live up to those stereotypes with intimidation with firearms, death threats, misspelled signs, rabid anger at fabricated boogeymen, and outright racism. That way when we take the media to task, we look so much more credible. Got it?

you mean those orthographically challenged, teabag-festooned tailgate partiers whose view of american history seems to have been definitively formed by sitcoms and fabreeze commercials?

And history lessons from Nick at Nite…

I really like the gymnasts, they can steal from me anytime.

Amen, brother. Don’t forget the volleyball players.

Whiteman and Butthurt, worst superhero duo evar

Men were 49-48… And if white men voted only 41% for

9’s are just socielest liebrul for 1’s

The so-called “round Earth” theory is an area that illuminates liberalism’s “epistemic closure” far, far, far more than the Right’s.

I agree. But the proof that the Earth is flat should put the global warming argument to bed once and for all, and lieberals will have to admit that algor has no rithm. Also Jonah Goldberg to.

Don’t forget the volleyball players.

How could I forget them?

Whiteman and Butthurt, worst superhero duo evar

HA! Nice one!

I really like the gymnasts, they can steal from me anytime.

They are too small. Volleyball chicks.

So, the new White Man’s burden is to save the country from all the non-white men voting wrong?

How could I forget them?

Would you excuse me for about 6 minutes? Thank you.

“In his spare time he admires Norman Rockwell paintings, collects antiques, and is an avid soccer fan.”

He IS a Norman Rockwell painting.

See, we on the left can build consensus!

I thought it would be lower than 41% actually. Yay white dudes!

Yay white dudes

That’s right! White men everywhere are fighting oppression from the non-white, non-male hordes trying to ruin our country with all of this nanny state equality bullshit. We’re on to their little secret plot.

epistemic closure

What’s this epidemiologic colostomy? You wingnuts keep using that term. I do not think it means what you think it does.

9’s are just socielest liebrul for 1’s

lol. There are men who are not white, you know. And they would all be summarily detained if they ever took a trip to Arizona.

Whiteman and Butthurt, worst superhero duo evar

Now I have a new idea for my next concept album. Sweet!

White d00ds, they’re doin’ it for themselves!!!

The more that they go one about how AWESOME they will pwn Obama and the Dems this fall the more I think they are going to fail. They might pick up a couple of seats but I’m keeping my fingers crossed that is about it.

Two more years of being the minority party. That’s going to hurt bigtime.

Now I have a new idea for my next concept album.

Don’t forget the falsetto whining and 17-minute bass solos.

Try “Democrats saw a drunk and abusive father whose idea of parenthood was to stay up at night shooting the neighbors with ammunition paid for out of the children’s piggybank.”

Not even- I don’t cotton to that daddy bullshit. I saw a drunk and incompetent employee who was running a business in which I am a shareholder into the ground, all the while breaking the inventory and harming/killing his co-workers.

Don’t forget the falsetto whining and 17-minute bass solos.

I dare you to find a 17-minute bass solo. And then buy it and send it to me.

Now I have a new idea for my next concept album.

Don’t forget the falsetto whining and 17-minute bass solos.

Of course. I’m imagining something dramatic like Operation Mindcrime, but with more racism and butthurt.

I dare you to find a 17-minute bass solo.

Since accepting that dare would involve listening to music intelligently designed to protect all comers from zombies by melting their branes, I respectfully decline.

Ain’t getting off the boat, but how then does he address the phenomenon of the Right’s two superstars, Palin and Bachman?

but how then does he address the phenomenon of the Right’s two superstars, Palin and Bachman?

Does honorary manhood involve strap-ons?

You’re not going to believe this:

http://www.truthdig.com/report/item/tea_party_financiers_owe_their_fortune_to_joseph_stalin_20100418/

That’s right!

John Birch founders and Teabaggers extraordinaires the Koch family made their $$$ building infrastructure for the Soviet Union.

I guess that’s why they have so much inside info on Commubama’s Five-Year-Plan to forge an Islamofascist Comintern.

If the lamestream media resorts to sneering

I do so love it when wingnuts employ name-calling while they decry uncivil discourse.

Does honorary manhood involve strap-ons?

Oh, Jesus fucking Christ. I literally hit my head into the wall after I read that. Hopefully, I killed the right brain cells so I can forget that.

That’s because historically, the female vote tends to split between the two parties, casting men as electoral tie-breakers.

So… while many women vote their conscience, many men are just wing-nugget block-voting assholes?

Tigris is ignoring the fact that women have succumbed to temptation and invested in identity politics. Fortunately white males are immune.

I dare you to find a 17-minute bass solo.

Chris Squire, live at Wembley Stadium, June 14, 1973.

(Made ya look.)

I dare you to find a 17-minute bass solo. And then buy it and send it to me.

I could tape myself playing the intro for Under Pressure. It’d take me seventeen minutes to get it right.

I dare you to find a 17-minute bass solo. And then buy it and send it to me.

I could tape myself playing the intro for Under Pressure. It’d take me seventeen minutes to get it right.

Really? I can play it perfectly.

(on Guitar Hero)

Yes, we wear our Depends™ on the outside.

Why do you ask?
~

OMG! White d00ds are going to vote Republican and that’s their secret for taking back the reins of gubmint! When did this new development happen? White guys voting for teh GOP? That totally changes everything!!!1!one1OVER9000!!1

Results 1 – 30 of 30 for “longest bass solo”

The longest bass solo is so near to inconceivable that only 30 people in the world have ever written about such a thing. Do the Elder Gods intervene?

Really? I can play it perfectly.

(on Guitar Hero)

I can play the entire thing perfectly.

(On iTunes)

CHEATING.

I know you meanbass guitar, and this one’s short, but when I think of awesome bass parts, I think of Flight of the Bumblebee.

Holy Flight of the Bumblebee McGravy!

Tuba guy is kinda cheating too: half-pressing the valves to stop the notes.

Nevertheless, we should totally kiss.

HAWT!

SUPER HAWT! And I mean that in a totally heterosexual way.

Substance McGravitas said,

April 24, 2010 at 1:23

Results 1 – 30 of 30 for “longest bass solo”

Lolz.

~

17-minute bass

an all-bass talking fish clock?

What the fucking fuck is wrong with these fucking people?

i also heard something about fish evolving to live out of the water, since they are able to get around by themselves via something called a “walking bass line”, apparantly further perfected by some bioscience researcher named Mingus

This one breaks five minutes. Maybe you could listen to hit three and a half times in a row.

A model for bass soloists.

From T&U’s swamphole link:

It is aiming to tap into the vast well of anti-government fury now coursing through the nation.

You know, the vast well that isn’t really there Good luck, morans.

Oh, and aren’t wells deep? You should tap a “deep well” or a “vast ocean” right? And yes, VPR.

Oh, and by the way T&U: A big sarcastic THANKS for reminding me that Time’s swampland exists. I had managed to somehow purge that from my brain.

That sentence is missing a period. It should take a pregnancy test. I blame WP, as usual.

What the fucking fuck is wrong with these fucking people?

They don’t fuck often enough.

reading the article about ambulatory bottom feeders, it seems that the best bass for walking upright are the ones with blue scales. curious.

Hence, GOP priorities emphasize strengthening the military, illegal immigration, and moral breakdown.

Huh. So they are in favor of legalizing pot. Noted.

A model for bass soloists.

another bass model

What the fucking fuck is wrong with these fucking people?

Republican Governors Pay Homage To Guy Fawkes
Guy Fawkes and his co-conspirators wanted to wipe out the people’s representatives and reinstate a theocracy, so I can’t see what they’re on about.

TruculentandUnreliable said,

April 24, 2010 at 1:33

What the fucking fuck is wrong with these fucking people?

If people like Michael Scherer would write about the absolute hypocrisy of the goose-stepping goopers claiming to be a party of the people, then this wouldn’t even happen.

Instead the M.S.’s of our corporate media gush over the awesomeness of it, and the goopers are rewarded. Rinse, repeat, and here we are.
~

They do know what happened to Guy Fawkes, don’t they?

And of course today he is remembered by the universally joyous celebration of his execution.

Boooooo… he’s out of costume in Tintin’s picture.

I too had forgotten about Swampland. The blogroll is new – check it out, both teh Corner and Powertools! I guess that’s supposed to be balanced by… TAPPED? BM Matt?

A model for bass soloists.

Best Billy Sheehan ever.

Beaky the Buzzard wrote:

A solid majority of citizens now believe the government…”doesn’t do enough to help average Americans….”

Since when did wingnuts give a shit about helping average Americans? Pick yerselves up by yer bootstraps, bitches!

A few years back, two left-leaning writers, Andy and Lana Wachowski, adapted the story of Guy Fawkes

The fail is strong in this one.

Carey Roberts is much less entertaining than Harry Caray.

Maybe if the funked it up with a kick-ass theme song.

88 comments right now. Wonder why THAT caught my eye…

The fail is strong in this one.
Fail? What do you mean? So Scherer is ignorant of the existence of Alan Moore, and has turned “guy disguised by a Guy Fawkes mask” into “Guy Fawkes as hero”. Other than that, he got EVERYTHING RITE.

88 comments right now. Wonder why THAT caught my eye…

88 Comments About 44 Wingnuts

“What the fucking fuck is wrong with these fucking people?”

Republicans are traitors. No more needs to be said.

Uh… did I kill the thread?

Due to slow connection and easy distractibility by shiny objects, I did not follow the link to “Boobquake” posted by SMcG the other day. Thus I was not aware until now that it is the inspiration of Jen / Blag Hag, the creator of Atheist Barbie, who really should be on the blogroll here.

Republican Governors Pay Homage To Guy Fawkes
Guy Fawkes and his co-conspirators wanted to wipe out the people’s representatives and reinstate a theocracy, so I can’t see what they’re on about

I think you see perfectly well what they’re on about…christian nation and all…

You’d think that elected representatives who admire Guy Fawkes could express that admiration by blowing themselves up. Or resigning. Or something.

Due to slow connection and easy distractibility by shiny objects, I did not follow the link to “Boobquake”

If “Boobquake” is not a shiny object, I don’t know what is!

Is a boobquake measure on the rackter scale?

I blame the grammatical error in my previous comment on the merest contemplation of a “Boobquake”.

If the lamestream media resorts to sneering stereotypes of angry White males

I do hope they remember to include a picture of you, Mr Sunshine.

Whiteman and Butthurt, worst superhero duo evar

I’m sorry, but you TOTALLY misspelled BEST there.

I really like the gymnasts, they can steal from me anytime.

They are too small.

They’re WIRY.

The 17 minute bass solo only counts if it’s a five string fretless electric.

Joni speaks.

Americans have decided to be stupid and shallow since 1980. Madonna is like Nero; she marks the turning point.

Bob [Dylan] is not authentic at all. He’s a plagiarist, and his name and voice are fake. Everything about Bob is a deception. We are like night and day, he and I.

She says some other stuff too.

Everything about Bob is a deception.

Not the Jewfro… NOT THE JEWFRO!!!!

Pastor Swank should take a good long look at this Carey guy, cuz that’s his future (web site avatar).

Don’t forget the falsetto whining and 17-minute bass solos.

Derek Smalls’ Jazz Odyssey, anyone?

WF

Even Shorter Carey Roberts:

I Am Wingnut, Hear Me HENNNNGGGGHHHHH?

Every time I see the phrase “epistemic closure”, I’m all “Ouch ouch ouch!”, and I never even had any kids.

In his defense, I am stupid. And a bitch.

Well,ok… I’m not stupid.

If “Boobquake” is not a shiny object, I don’t know what is!

Is a boobquake measure on the rackter scale?

I rate for Boobquake!!

The 17 minute bass solo only counts if it’s a five string fretless electric.

..played with an e-bow.

Wes F. in Hapeville said,
April 24, 2010 at 3:57

Don’t forget the falsetto whining and 17-minute bass solos.

Derek Smalls’ Jazz Odyssey, anyone?

WF
”

everyone bailed on SP just then they were really starting to blow some minds.

Oops. ST I meant.

I Am White Man. Hear Me ROAR!

Well, it’s a nice change from I Am Butthurt. Hear Me WHINE!

Oh….no……wait……..nevermind.

It’s not a change at all.

Subtle use of Depends.

Damnit Tintin! You once again made me type a Derrida comment. Even deconstructionist capitalization.

Cadwallader, it is a self-perpetuating phenomenon.

C

everyone bailed on ST just then they were really starting to blow some minds.

To be fair, they were there for Puppet Show.

everyone bailed on ST just then they were really starting to blow some minds.

To be fair, they were there for Puppet Show.
”

Phbbpt.

OMG! White d00ds are going to vote Republican and that’s their secret for taking back the reins of gubmint!

Yeah. This made me think of all of the Redoublechin rep & senator threats about how now they’re rilly rilly not gonna vote for anything Obama wants done.

They’re so butthurt, we don’t even get trolls anymore.

They’re so butthurt, we don’t even get trolls anymore.

Uhhh, so like, liberals suck. Huh, huh-huh-huh, huh-huh. I said suck, huh-huh.

(I think that’s a succinct summary of your typical wingnut troll.)

(I said succinct. Huh-huh, huh-huh-huh.)

17 minute bass solo

Bad thing happen when drums stop.

I find your lack of trucknutz disturbing.

Hey it’s the “More Flags, More Fun” guy relaxing from a long and hard day of misogyny.

John Birch founders and Teabaggers extraordinaires the Koch family made their $$$ building infrastructure for the Soviet Union.

FUCK. ME.

You’re right, I don’t believe it. Wow.

St. Trotsky, Pope-in-Avignon said,

April 24, 2010 at 2:03

Carey Roberts is much less entertaining than Harry Caray.
St. Trotsky, Pope-in-Avignon said,

April 24, 2010 at 2:03

Carey Roberts is much less entertaining than Harry Caray.
St. Trotsky, Pope-in-Avignon said,

April 24, 2010 at 2:03

Carey Roberts is much less entertaining than Harry Caray.

But of126 posts, al of you regulars not notingthe box of depends is negligent atbest.

Ae you ignoring the fact that mybe this guy is concerned about wo h sh8s on, and when,incuding himself?

Your keen powers of obsrvaton are becomming foggy. You owe me a coordinated attack of ART CHANCE on the redstate for this. I can tell you what will hit him hard and also make him even more paranoid, and separate the rest of this group of whackjobs not want to associate with the modern bnd leader of Alaska.

Email me at alaskaisgongdown@gmail.com . Payoffs are a bitch so do it. Get your free Redstate ‘sleeper’ accounts now.

“In his spare time he admires Norman Rockwell paintings…”

So he’s one of those hapless types who stands before his collection devoutly wishing he can jump into one of the paintings–only to find out that one’s been replaced by a Goya? Or, even more terrifying, a James Van Der Zee?

“…and is an avid soccer fan.”

Isn’t that a bit too much diversity for the likes o’ him?

Fuck, this is awesome. Commissioned but unused (can’t imagine why) cover art for this year’s Fortune 500 issue.

h/t to digby

Larkspur said,
Every time I see the phrase “epistemic closure”, I’m all “Ouch ouch ouch!”
I see what you do there.

sadly, I’m Disppointed said,
April 24, 2010 at 9:19 (kill)

Okay, I get that the monkey represents sharing, but… what the hell was that all about?

justme said,

April 24, 2010 at 6:48

I find your lack of trucknutz disturbing.

So did the State of Virginia – they pulled that license plate. (trying to find the link)

Take a look at it and see if you see anything special… (I did).

Here we go, I knew it was on Gawker somwhere

internet-ruins-racist-pickup-trucks-fun

John Birch founders and Teabaggers extraordinaires the Koch family made their $$$ building infrastructure for the Soviet Union.

I read that at Exiled Online a couple days ago. Hilariously typical, eh? I particularly liked how they waited until the money stopped rolling in to become outraged by the deaths of their engineers(assuming it even happened).

Fuck, this is awesome. Commissioned but unused (can’t imagine why) cover art for this year’s Fortune 500 issue.

Holy crap. Are those planes flying into the buildings?

Commissioned but unused (can’t imagine why) cover art for this year’s Fortune 500 issue.

Wow. That’s, like, subersive or something.

Fuck, this is awesome. Commissioned but unused (can’t imagine why) cover art for this year’s Fortune 500 issue.

For one thing, Florida’s hideous capitol building isn’t in Ft. Lauderdale.

I dare you to find a 17-minute bass solo.

Fish playing music?? worst Wii evar!

I think this qualifies.

Christ, check out the “Latest Articles” by this guy:
“White men stiffed by the Obama administration”
“Latest threat to the Constitution: the domestic violence industry”
“I-VAWA: liberal lies tempt women to embrace a radical agenda”
“Women need to speak out on feminism and the hateful ideology it represents”
“Abusegate: teaching women to falsely accuse”
“Feminists are a bunch of irrational ninnies”

If nothing else, he’s dedicated.