All I Really Need To Know, I Learned In Schlüsselgarten
Posted on February 10th, 2010 by Tintin
ABOVE: Debbie Schlussel, White American Patriot.
Posts by Frau Schlüssel are always extremely educational, but I found this one to be particularly so. Here’s what I learned:
- Muslims should never be hired as bus drivers because they all will stop the bus and prostrate themselves in the middle of the bus to pray to their false god.
- A Muslim stopping a bus to pray is exactly the same in each and every respect as a pedophile bus driver stopping the bus to rape a child.
- All British men are fags.
- America’s special relationship with Britain does not extend to admiring its fish and chips, which are much worse than the fish and chips that you can find here in America.
Wow, that link was scary, especially this comment:
“I only consider “progressive” to be when I join the upcoming revolution to clean out all non-Christians from America.”
So, there’s your right-wing Christianity, following the part of the Bible where Jesus says go out and slaughter anyone who doesn’t agree with you.
Tintin you are a clever bastard! And a frenchy fag too but that’s neither here nor there which is Europe. That shorter has got me jumping out of the boat. Alacritarilously.
Always. Trust. The. Shorter. ™
Y’know, we here in the Big Apple have lots-o-Muslims. Many of them even drive our taxis and buses.
And oh by the way, they’re smart enough to schedule their routes so that the prayers can take place when the bus is stopped and they’re on scheduled rest breaks.
We can only DO that because a) we have unions and b) we have work rules, both of which Debbiecakes would throw out the window if she had her way.
But if she had her way, she’d be barefoot and pregnant and wouldn’t have to compete with men because that would be, you know, too hard for a white woman…
Has Debbie always had that airbrushed photo of herself in the top-right corner?
Jumped out of the boat.
Wish I had landed on Schlussel and her commentators with hobnail boots while I was at it.
If a Muslim dude can get away with this in Britain, he can get away with it here.
Debbie is one of our leading postrationalists.
no mangos could be worth it. Crafty you are, Tintin, but I will be strong…
The same fears have been sparked by Orthodox Jews praying in Hebrew.
using a fluorescent jacket as a prayer mat
Hey, Tony Clifton drives a bus!
Thank you Tommy Friedman for burning me downstairs. I’ll stay in the boat this time.
Passengers said they feared the driver could be preparing for a terror attack.
Wingnuts, like dogs and toddlers, have not progressed beyond the “I don’t understand it, so it will probably kill me,” phase. This is that Harold and Kumar joke made real. Lord have mercy.
Lil Debbie ought to ride the bus down here in Bubbaland. Here they stop the damn bus, get out of the damn bus, and go into Earl’s Quicky Mart to get a sammich, a soda and some lottery tickets. Oh, will you be late for work? Tough shit.
In Britain, we’ve already had this story about Muslim bus drivers stopping their buses and praying once before. And you know what, it turned out to be bullshit.
And as for, “ugly royalty, bad fish and chips, and more cloudy skies and effeminate men”?! Ugly royalty – sure. Cloudy skies – yes, and I’ll guess that is the fault of our dhimmified socialist system (so socialist we have royalty, and so dhimmified that our Head of State is also head of the Church of England). Effeminate men? Guess she’s not actually been to Britain, and thinks everybody is fucking Quentin Crisp or straight from Brideshead revisited. The (well, one of the) heavyweight champion of the world is British, for Allah’s sake. But bad fish and chips?! I thought that you Americans were mental when you mounted protests against universal health care, but this?
Ugh. Why was there no Shorter for me to trust?
Andrew,
That’s the story Debbie was quoting! You should go comment at her blog and straighten her out.
Actor, I thought from the date of the article that this was a new run for this story, suspiciously close as it is to the one that had a run out the other year.
My favourite comment below Debbie’s post:
“Why don’t you waddle back to Stormfront now? Hindus, Buddhists,and other religious groups have had problems with Islam, and not just your Christians. We do not need a badly disguised racial supremacist here.”
But bad fish and chips?! I thought that you Americans were mental when you mounted protests against universal health care, but this?
Well, maybe if you folks used ketchup on your “chips”…which we have the good sense to call “fries”…
Where was the story debunked, Andrew? I’d love to do a comparison. A quick Google search didn’t turn anything up.
http://www.islamophobia-watch.com/islamophobia-watch/2008/4/7/get-off-my-bus-i-need-to-pray.html
Ah, Found it!
Going to post at Debbie’s…
http://tabloid-watch.blogspot.com/2009/02/sun-has-paid-out-30000-to-muslim-bus.html
We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all white men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable rights, that among these are ignorance, safety, and the power to smash things that are different from them.That to secure these rights, governments are instituted among rich men, deriving their powers from the fear and poverty of the governed. That whenever any form of government becomes a threat to wealth and privilege, it is the duty of poor white men to alter or to abolish it, so that they too may be rich one day, when the tyranny of dark people and atheists and women and sodomites is ended and they have to give us their gold.
Kicked her in the nipples for good measure.
So-called Actor is attempting to regain the self pwnage title. That was from two years ago.
I know Lil’ Debbie didn’t have a brain or the ability to use reason or logic.
I now know she has no taste buds, either.
/puts malt vinegar on his fries
//but only when accompanying fish
PeeJ, no fucking kidding you motherfucking asshole.
SHE’S BEEN TAKEN IN BY THE SAME SCAM TWO YEARS LATER!
Thank you Tommy Friedman for burning me downstairs.
That wasn’t Friedman. That was your mom.
No, dickweed, it’s not the same scam. It appears to be not a scam at all.
Jeebus, how much did you guys drink last night? And what were you drinking? You appear to have lost a gazillion brain cells.
Also, I don’t know what Schlussel is talking about re: British men. I guess Daniel Craig is all faggy because he wears a tuxedo?
ACTOR-FOODIE FLAME WAR
“I only consider “progressive” to be when I join the upcoming revolution to clean out all non-Christians from America.”
Dear Ms. Schlussel — your political allies, once they are finished hating on the Muslims will move onto hating on you. I know you hope that by encouraging them to hate on the Muslims, they won’t notice you but that won’t work. Just ask Martin Niemoller.
Perhaps you should choose new political allies other than people who want you “cleaned out of America”. Jus’ sayin’
I WILL NOT HAVE BRITISH FISH AND CHIPS BESMIRCHED
pedestrian said,
February 10, 2010 at 21:21
“We hold these truths to be self-evident…”
I bow down before your supermagnificent awesomeness, pedestrian.
English fish-&-chips are a cunning plan to recycle fish bones by covering them with a thin layer of slime, then battering and frying them.
Passengers said they feared the driver could be preparing for a terror attack.
Wingnuts, like dogs and toddlers, have not progressed beyond the “I don’t understand it, so it will probably kill me,” phase.
Hey, it’s taken nearly 10 years of work to inculcate that willingness to see potential terror attacks everywhere, even in unfamiliar but clearly harmless behaviour. Don’t diss all the effort involved!
There’s no way I’m getting out-the-boat but the fish and chips in the UK are better than here in the USofA. Which is to say that in the UK they’re execrable and here inedible.
Muslims should never be hired as bus drivers because they all will stop the bus and prostrate themselves in the middle of the bus
Well, I guess that’s better than prostating themselves in the middle of the bus.
Or bussing themselves in the middle of the prostate. Also.
The (well, one of the) heavyweight champion of the world is British, for Allah’s sake.
He can’t possibly be British, he’s a black person! Everyone who is stupid knows there are no black people in the UK! The only ethnic minorities in the UK are Muslim terrorists that immigrated from the arid deserts of Arabia, who now make up 90% of the population through stealing our jobs and our women!
– Probably someone’s real opinion
That “who is stupid” there was crossed out originally. It worked in the preview.
PeeJ, if you have an issue with me, I’d really like to know what it is.
If not, then keep your tongue civil.
Now, the NEW story is just a rehash of the OLD story, which had weeks and weeks of “factual” coverage until The Sun had to buck up and admit that it wasn’t entirely true.
If, you know, you read the articles.
OK, this is seriously confusing. The Daily Mail web story Debbie linked to was dated two days ago and said the incident happened “this week.” Isn’t the DM supposed to be a semi-respectable news outlet? They couldn’t just make up something like that, or dredge up an old discredited story from 2008 and say it happened just a few days ago, could they?
My best guess is that, like the incident in 2008, the bus in the recent story was immobilized for reasons the passengers weren’t informed about. Anyway, considering some of the bus drivers we have in Chicago, prayer would be a welcome change.
This new story has gone round all the usual right-wing outlets, and nowhere else, but seeing as there is a quote from Transport for London at the end of it, I assumed it was genuine. At Schlussel’s that quote reads:
“Transport for London said . . . ‘TfL and the individual bus operating companies acknowledge and value the diversity of their staff.”
Of course, there’s an ellipsis there, which maybe ought to have given Schlussel the clue that maybe they said something else as well. In fact, they also said:
“TfL apologised to all those delayed. A spokesman said: “The bus company has had a word with the driver as this is not something that should be happening.”
“He said TfL and the bus operators provide suitable prayer or quiet rooms at garages and other key locations.”
from: http://www.thisislondon.co.uk/standard/article-23803267-muslim-driver-halts-bus-to-kneel-in-aisle-and-pray.do
So, in fact, Transport for London weren’t exactly delighted about it, as Debbie would have you believe.
The point has been made elsewhere before, about global warming deniers, that this is assymetric warfare, that it costs far less for these people in credibility to make a blatantly incorrect or disingenuous statement than it takes for us to actually demonstrate what shit it is.
If Londoners insist on having a suburb called “Gospel Oak”, they can’t complain about people stopping there to pray.
At least the driver was sober.
That man is praying to a slightly different god than I do! I’m so scared.
Actor, I think it was just the perils of online communication; I got the sense he thought you were saying the driver was the scammer rather than the spreader of the BS story Schlussel fell for like an egg from a tall chicken.
Or bussing themselves in the middle of the prostate. Also.
This NEVER happens on the commuter train. Subway, though…
Bitter Scribe asked:
I suggest you google “hurrah for the blackshirts”, or http://www.mailwatch.co.uk
I suggest you google “hurrah for the blackshirts”, or http://www.mailwatch.co.uk
OK, I did both, and I take your point.
A lot of the stuff at “Mailwatch” went over my head, since I’m not very knowledgeable about UK politics or culture, but that idiot denying that smoking causes harm left me with my mouth open.
The Daily Hate as it is known in Britain, Bitter. 😉
It’s like the worst of the Washington Post op eds mixed with some Horowitz for ‘colour’.
My personal favourite was a poll asking whether gypsies should be MADE to jump queues in NHS venues because you can’t trust them not to pickpocket you while you wait for a doctor.
the bus driver jibes I can take, but slagging off our fish and chips, sacrilege….. I’ve tried fish and chips in the North America, and they suck…
“The Daily Mail web story Debbie linked to was dated two days ago and said the incident happened “this week.” Isn’t the DM supposed to be a semi-respectable news outlet?”
Hahahahaha. No.
“They couldn’t just make up something like that, or dredge up an old discredited story from 2008 and say it happened just a few days ago, could they?”
Why not? They make up most of what goes in the paper.
Tig, thanks. I’ll try not to rush my posts so much.
It sort of surprises me what gets published as fact in the UK, particularly in papers like The Mail and The Sun (Murdoch).
It rises to the level of the National Enquirer….barely. And yet, there’s not a lot of litigation over stuff.
I recall one day a few years ago when one of the tabloids published photos of “Becks” kissing a woman in a car, with the inference that he was cheating on Posh. I pointed out to my then inamorata how ridiculous these photos were, since you couldn’t see his face (or the driver’s), there was no backstory provided, and so how do we know it wasn’t some random yob kissing his wife goodmorning before packing off to work?
Next day, sure enough, there’s a retraction, which I’m told is rare in its own right.