Shorter GOP Election Strategy 2006: “GAAAAAAH!!! FAGS!!!!”

Analogy time- “Republicans : Homosexuals :: Dixiecrats : Black People”:

To address conservatives, who have been key to his election victories but have grown disenchanted with the administration, Bush and Senate Republicans are reviving their fight with Democrats over judicial nominations and last week voted out of committee a constitutional amendment banning same-sex marriage to set up a floor vote next month.

They know this amendment isn’t going anywhere, but that’s not the point. The point of the Federal Marriage Amendment is to fire up the Christian Right and make them believe the GOP is actually trying to transform America into a “Christian Nation” where Biblical morality is enforced by state power. The FMA will quietly disappear if the GOP holds onto Congress in November, and will be trotted out again in 2008, or whenever the GOP desperately needs to win an election. In the meantime, gay people will be further scapegoated and stigmatized. I hope Mary Cheney is proud of supporting this shit.


Comments: 40


The best part is, there aren’t a million fags in every city to march demanding their rights and causing trouble. Gay pride parades are much smaller and it’s easier to laugh off drag queens and leather dudes in assless chaps.

So for the GOP the old standby OMG GHEY will work much much better than the planned OMG MEXICANS. And with Howard Dean and so forth talking up “marriage is between a man and a woman” on the 700 Club I’m not expecting any help from the Dems.

We may need another Stonewall.


I guess so, Cargo — obviously catching more Republicans in flagrante de licto with rent boys and truck-stop sluts isn’t going to cut it…


The fact of the matter is that even Howard Dean has enough sense to know who is right when it comes to marriage.

Homosexual marriage is an oxymoron. It is a disgrace to marriage as we know it.

When Senator Santorum made his remarks on homosexual marriage, he was right. Legalizing homosexual marriage leads to the acceptance of polygamy and of child molestation.

If the Democrats in Congress refuse to represent their constitutents on Homosexual Marriage, then they will be replaced.

A vast majority of people oppose homosexual marriage, as shown by the wide margins of victory for marriage amendments in this nation.

Congress will do it’s job to make sure that activist judges are unable to legalize homosexual marriage.


Just like clockwork! We can always count on Gary to appear, misuse the word “fact”, and say something dreadfully stupid. It’s good to have some things you can count on in this world.


Don’t act so outraged. Did you societal vandals think that the envelope was never going to push back?


Every time I see a Ruppert comment, I think of Spongebob Squarepants screaming, “Gary, you are going to finish your dessert, and you are going to like it!”

It’s OK, Gary, you’re among friends here. We all know what it means when someone is really vocal in their “opposition” to those nasty gays. When you’re more comfortable with your identity, we’ll be here for you, buddy.


Good grief. Even the homophobic Christian Right must feel used and abused with this tired stunt at this point.


Don’t act so outraged. Did you societal vandals think that the envelope was never going to push back?

Ah, and what timing. A perfect example of one of the wingnuts to whom Brad was referring who is getting fired up right before our very eyes, oblivious to the fact that no one in Congress really gives a shit about him, but knows it can rely on him to get his “gay hate” on just in time for election day. I say “thank you”, Sanity Inspector. Without dipshits like you, Brad would have no material for posts like these.

Good grief. Even the homophobic Christian Right must feel used and abused with this tired stunt at this point.

You’d think, huh, but apparently not.


Vladi G:

I’m thinking anyone that calls themselve a “Sanity Inspector” fell of the bridge, rolled in dough, and stuck their head in the oven. He won’t make the menu.


“Legalizing homosexual marriage leads to the acceptance of polygamy and of child molestation.”

Proof, please.

Anonymous Wingnut

First, there was Will & Grace.

Now there is Big Love.

And let’s not forget 2-and-a-half Men… do you REALLY think there’s nothing going on there? You libs are so naive.

It’s only a matter of time before they remake Lassie for Senator Santorum.



Given recent history, I’d say membership in certain Christian sects is a better indicator than homo nups of “acceptance of polygamy and child molestation.”


I really don’t get this. In the US, the definition of civil (legal) marriage is a state right, is it not (in Canada, it isn’t; the federal government defines civil marriage, and the province decides how it’s legally implemented). So how can anyone even suggest a constitutional ban on same-sex marriage, since that’s not within the power delegated to the federal government?

Gosh, what I’m doing? I’m supposed to be laughing about this kind of stuff.


Mary Cheney has absolutely no relevance to ANYONE, she does not connect intellectually or emotionally with lesbians, or gay men (I am a gay man, with many lesbian friends). Mary Cheney does not evoke empathy with straights, either conservative or liberal. 

Mary Cheney is her father’s daughter, she is heir to immense wealth and privilege – a member of the American ruling class. 

Mary Cheney is a disgusting selfish creature who does not deserve the media attention she is getting. 

Watch her book sales tank after she spends $20,000 of her personal fortune to try to make it seem like anyone cares about her miserable self-centered life. – CincyGuy


I’m beginning to think P.T. Barnum may have been wrong.

Apparently, you really can fool all of the people all of the time. The Repubs sure seem to be.

The bulk of the Republican party doesn’t give a good goddamn about the queers one way or the other. But is sure serves to get the völkisch right all riled up. And anybody with even the slightest grasp on twentieth century history at all should understand immediately why that is such a bad idea.

A note to all of my gay and gay-positive friends out there: the minute they start publishing things like “The Protocols of the Elders of Sodom” or “The International Queer“, do yourself a favor and get out of the country. Quickly.

Republicans have apparently NO idea what deep, dark and ugly forces in the id they’re messing with when they stir shit like this up.

Or perhaps that’s naive of me. Maybe they do know.

michael farris

Mary Cheney = class trumps orientation.
She doesn’t care what kind of anti-gay legislation passes because her family has more than enough money to not be affected.
One of the reasons the very wealthy don’t like paying for social services of government is they really don’t use any, they buy their own.


I saw Mary Cheney on Letterman last week. CincyGuy, you’re dead right… her answers were as scripted as any Scott McClellan press conference. Who does she speak for?

Nombrilisme Vide

So, are y’all gonna stand for s.z.’s gauntlet slap?

Nombrilisme Vide

Argh! I meant, s.z.’s gauntlet slap


It must be so nice to grow up assured that no matter what happens to everyone else, you’re taken care of. Screw Mary Cheney and her duplicitous, slick ways. It’s just like David Bender said this morning on Rachel Maddow: “She is her father’s daughter.”


Y’all. I’ve got it: Gay Mexicans. OLE!


Gary: Hey! You got homos in my nups!
Swank: You got nups in my homos!

Homo Nups! Two great tastes that taste great together.


Republicans have apparently NO idea what deep, dark and ugly forces in the id they’re messing with when they stir shit like this up. Or perhaps that’s naive of me. Maybe they do know.

I was just thinking of exactly that earlier this morning. Watching Ramesh Ponnuru on the Daily Show earlier this week might have made me laugh at other times, but this time it infuriated me.

Here’s this fucker shitting out a book like “The Party of Death”, trying to join Coulter and her epigone in the race to the bottom of the discourse, but what do we see when the spotlight’s on him? A big, tough, sneering brownshirt-in-training? Fuck no, it’s just Urkel by way of India, a snivelling little twit with a helium-balloon voice, doing what looks like a Woody Allen impression, stuttering, gulping, backtracking and stammering as Jon Stewart calmly takes his bullshit apart like a tolerant parent catching their little brat with a dangerous weapon in their hand.

It’s enraging to see bored, vacuous dilettantes amusing themselves by stirring this kind of shit up. I guess slipping roofies into girls’ drinks before raping them isn’t such a thrill anymore, so trying to provoke the growth of a star-spangled fascism is the new thing to do. Fuckers. Goddamn, I hate these motherfuckers.


Right. Remind me to keep my pets, minor relatives, drunk friends, and houseplants the hell away from Gary, who clearly does not understand “consent”.


Hey Jillian: That quote about fooling people is actually from Lincoln. Barnum said “There’s a sucker born every minute,” (supposedly).

Another one that could be applied to this situation, with a little tweaking, is “No one ever went broke underestimating the taste of the American public.” (E.g., no one ever lost an election underestimating the discernment of American voters.)


Alas, contrary to Mr. Ruppert, there is no ‘vast majority’ of people opposed to homosexual marriage. This recent poll shows that public opinion on the marriage issue is very nearly even parity.

Certainly not overwhelmingly opposed, as he claims as ‘fact’.

Actually, my understanding is that when you remove the word ‘marriage’ and make it civil unions, the majority of people in America are just fine with it.

The government should get out of the marriage biz altogether. There should be legal recognition of status for financial and legal reasons. I am sure there will always be a Church of Bigotry to allow Gary and his friends to hate TEH GAY!!!

And that, friend Ruppert, is how you do FACTS. Not with a lot of vague assertions unsupported by reality (which as we know, has a liberal bias).

Sorry everybody. I’m not so good at snark. Too much time in the reality-based community.


I’m sure Gary Ruppert would be ashamed of himself, if I thought for one moment he was actually listening.

He isn’t, though: he never does. He just shows up to spew his tripe, one comment per thread, and then watches the hubbub that invariably surrounds him. Then he gets to repeat the process all over again with the next posting.

The fact is, Gary Ruppert is far too cowardly to stick around and defend his outrageous claims. He knows none of them hold up to any real scrutiny, which is why every one of his postings is a hit & run.


I’m beginning to think P.T. Barnum may have been wrong.

You’re right. There’s a sucker born every SECOND.

societal vandalâ„¢

Gary’s probably huffing more gasoline these days as he watches his pantheon slide further into the tank. And regardless of the fervor of his trollosity, it’s hard to find the keyboard when you’re wearing a good toluene buzz.

Which is a mixed blessing.

True, Gary has the IQ of yeast; but troll-jousting helps relieve the tension of watching his pantheon trash the country while they go under. (Apologies for the groganous grammar)



*You may fool all the people some of the time; you can even fool some of the people all the time; but you can’t fool all of the people all the time.

o Variants: You can fool all the people some of the time, and some of the people all the time, but you cannot fool all the people all the time.
You can fool some of the people all of the time, and all of the people some of the time, but you can not fool all of the people all of the time.
o This is probably the most famous of apocryphal remarks attributed to Lincoln, but despite sometimes being cited as from a speech in Clinton, Illinois, on September 1858, there are no contemporary records or accounts that he ever declared this, and the earliest known document which contains it is “Abe” Lincoln’s Yarns and Stories (1904) by Alexander K. McClure. The statement has also sometimes been attributed to P. T. Barnum or Bob Dylan.


Fool me once… something something something.


I think I’ve got Gary pegged. His routine is to write one or two brain-damaged responses utterly devoid of facts, and then sit back and stroke himself as he gleefully watches the uproar. He’s enjoying every minute of his trollery.


I think Gary’s a prank one our hosts is playing on us.


“I think Gary’s a prank one our hosts is playing on us.”

Oh, he’s a phony, alright, but I suspect he’s his own phony.

And I second the notion that was stated above: we DO need another Stonewall, and soon.


Mmmm… homo nups! It’s handy when you have your uniform fetish all built-in like that.


So, the Mounties DO always get their man. I thought that was a myth.


We should implement marriage the way a minimalist state would: no government privilages for ANY conjoined couple, and have it be totally private and based on faith. We’d see a lot less gold diggers, pre-nup battles, and loveless marriages if there was nothing beyond love and commitment involved. No tax cuts for anyone who is married or civilly unioned would mean that everyone would have to be seen as GASP! equal!

Take it away from everyone if you’re not going to give it to everyone.


Since the two prongs of Republican strategy are to instigate and then exploit the illogical fear of Mexicans and gays, it’ll be the new trifecta if they ever meet my old college roomate and discover that there are (dun-dun-DUNNNN!) ….gay Mexicans! (gasp)


And let us not forget, according to the unimpeachable source, Brokeback Mountain,gay Mexicans are all male prostitutes! man, the Repubs will clean up with…
[whisper whisper whisper]
Uhhh… OK, maybe not so much so.


Oh, and I’d like to state, for the record, that it’s a supreme honor to be chosen again as the official Republican Divisive Electoral Issue For 2006â„¢. I’d really expected to be tossed aside like a spooge-stained kleenex, but they like me, they really like me!


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