Life Imitates Blog
So, Bush assures Fox that our little military mobilization at the border will just be temporary. I know what they’re thinking at the White House. We can have a lovely little “fake war” at the border, one with all the cool uniforms, hummers, helicopters, etc… A war which is entirely safe. A war where there isn’t really an enemy. And the president can safely visit that war, prance around in his codpiece, yell things out a bullhorn while sitting astride a massive hummer.
Ridiculous, but that’s probably the plan.
Bush, today:
As Iraqis awaited the final formation of their new national unity government, at least 19 Iraqis and four U.S. soldiers were killed and a police chief narrowly escaped an assassination attempt in attacks in the country’s two largest cities Thursday.
The four U.S. soldiers and their Iraqi interpreter were killed when their vehicle struck a roadside bomb northwest of Baghdad, the U.S. military said in a statement. At least 2,454 members of the U.S. military have died since the war began in March 2003, according to an Associated Press count.
It’s hard work.
I’ll pretend this is a “Bush open thread” and mention Bush’s treatment of visiting Australian president John Howard, one of his bestest friends. Here are some of the jokes he told, in typical belittling presidential fashion: Somebody said, ‘You and John Howard appear to be so close, don’t you have any differences?’,” Mr Bush said when asked why they got on so well. “And I said ‘Yes, he doesn’t have any hair’.”
Yeah, right, “Somebody” gave him that lame setup. People are alla time asking if there are any differences AT ALL between two people. Snappy (imagined) riposte, G, by the way.
And this one: “He may not be the prettiest person on the block but when he tells you something, you can take it to the bank,” he said. Um, if I looked like a beady-eyed, smirking monkey, I wouldn’t be too quick to make jokes that assumed everyone recognized me as the handsome one.
He should have been on Fire Island talking about the Homo Nups Amendment. His codpiece would have been much appreciated there.
Well, couldn’t we all see this coming?
What I want to see? Bush’s poll numbers among the knucledraggers go soooooooooooo low, that in order to get good PR, he has to rope and hogtie an “illegal immigrant”…mid-border crossing and all.
You know, something in the COPS genre. Maybe even let W wear a wife beater shirt.
All I want to know is, will we still have Poland on our side? I don’t want us to forget Poland.
Bush should’ve talked about homo-nups while stroking John Howard’s bald head.
He should have been on Fire Island talking about the Homo Nups Amendment. His codpiece would have been much appreciated there.
“Want some wood?”
Bush should’ve talked about homo-nups while stroking John Howard’s bald head. Don’t think he didn’t want to.
Get a load of this shit:
Howard’s word was his bond, Bush said.
“In order to work together to make difficult decisions, decisions of war and peace, decisions of security, decisions of trade, you’ve got to have … somebody you’re talking to who tells you straight up what’s on their mind,” the president said.
“Politics sometimes produces people that’ll tell you one thing and don’t mean it.
“It’s really hard to be making rational decisions if somebody you’re talking to just doesn’t level with you.
“And that’s what I like about John Howard.
And that’s what NOBODY likes about you, George WMD Bu**sh**.
Aww..isn’t that sweet – he still thinks people give a sh@t what’s he’s doing.
Rolling up his sleeve the way Brownie’s advisor admired so much…he’s doing hard work…
Urk!
SPEEEEEWWWWWWWW!!1!
[wipes mouth]
Oh dear, sainted Quentin Crisp, NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!1
Has anyone mentioned presidential pardons recently? I mean, if people are going to talk about impeachment went Dems are elected this fall, then surely they must be willing to talk about the round of presidential pardons that wil follow suit…won’t they?
How does Karl Rove fit into that uniform?
I had the impression he was more manatee-esque.
Clench, and… Release!
Oh, what a lovely little war. Just like Grenada, only with brown people instead of black people!
Dear God, I just realized that that is a real picture of Clusterfuck in the dune buggy.
Bet he’s got the Jack shoved up under the seat. Cobag.
If this isn’t his “Dukakis in the tank” moment then fuck me. That drunk’s been in the tank for years.
“Howard’s word was his bond, Bush said.”
It was John Howard who came up with “core” and “non-core” promises” to explain election promises which didn’t materialise. Aslo commonly referred to as “ratty”. They should make a nice couple.
That one pic on the left looks like a joke, like he’s doing a fundraising telethon for “US border patrol” which is just really a shell company designed to funnel millions of dollars via fixed predator drone contracts.
God, that’s how bad this president is, I’m trying to think of ways Bush could screw everyone else in fictional situations.
“He may not be the prettiest person on the block but when he tells you something, you can take it to the bank.”
“Belittling”? Perhaps.
But remember, Howard had just given a talk to the Chicago Council on Foreign Relations! Not long after that, he gave a speech to both the Canadian Senate and the Canadian House of Commons simultaneously.
There was a very real danger that all that excitement might go to his little bald head. Hence, Bush’s helpful, grounding words.
Iraqis are dying, and the ones that aren’t are leaving! Thanks Dear Leaker!
English is the official language. Next year, white is the official skin color. Kainin mo ako nasty ass fascists. I swear learning Spanish is now a priority for me. Hell, I have a start already. I learned some trolley spanish in San Dog. No pongan sus pies en los ascientos.
Probably spelled wrong though. Non rumpere mi coglione.
Yes,sir. Yes, sir. Look at me. I’m the Commanderer.
Wow, my opinion of him is completely changed now! He must be a hardworkin’ kind of guy if his sleeves are rolled up!
Also, their logo design guy sucks. You can barely read the “Border Patrol” part because of the outline in the background. Like we wouldn’t know it’s the US Border Patrol unless they include a helpful illustration.
At last, the perfect war — one where the enemy has no weapons at all.
Did you guys somehow forget that we are at WAR??? Remember, we have to PROTECT our BORDERS from all of the EVIL DOOeeERrrS. Man, I have a really hard time keeping a strait face when I type that…viva south africa!!!