Action Alert: US/Mexico Border Wall Solution in Crisis as Hispanofascists Research “La Scala” Weapon

us-mexico-border.jpg
Proposed 2,000-mile border wall (in green)

ladder.jpg
Mexlamicist border assault team with ‘La Scala’ prototype

 

Comments: 38

 
 
 

What they really need is one of those barriers that goes up and down, with spikes on top of it, like you find in Super Mario Brothers – the ones that you need the right timing to make it past.

Then, only the ablest Muslicans would be able to make it into the country. Unless we added blocks that go back and forth and evil turtles to the wall, as well.

 
 

it is a real good idea… bildin a wall on the border… be cause then only the immigrints that is in real good shape are gonna get over it… and they are the ones we want they are real good at squattin in the fields… so i am gonna build the wall but not too high…

 
 

Damn Chicoms – they’ll sell their wall scaling technology to anyone.

 
 

Hm, La Scala IS easier to tote around than a large human-sized slingshot and a mattress.

 
 

The jokes around the border this morning have changed: “Hear abut the new jobs for us?” asks one Mexicn ditty, “who do u thin’s gonna wind up building that wall?” Another story now circulating: “New Wall 50Ft, New Ladders for Sale 51ft.”

From Marc Cooper’s blog, way back on January 13, 2006.

 
 

It’s amazing how the wingnuts will just follow the script and demonize whoever they are told to demonize. You never heard a peep about immigration until Karl Rove decided it was important.

 
 

Dear Leader! Great to see you here. I’m a frequent visitor to your site. Thanks for all the thots, and keep em comin. Git er done.

 
 

Clearly, we need legislation to outlaw the dangerous transfer of manual-ascent technologies to brown folks outside our borders. This will guarantee our security because non-Americans can’t invent anything themselves.

 
 

You mongolians get away from my shitty wall!! Aaaa! I stop you this time!

 
 

What we need is to encase the country in walls that reach up to the heavens so nobody can come in. Call it the “Tower of Babel” project and it’ll sell in the Bible belt, no problem.

 
 

This all reminds me of Arlo Guthrie’s song, the Tale of Reuben Clamzo and His Strange Daughter (in the key of G). During the rambling intro, he says something like:

So Americans built forts. Them forts. You know them
pictures of them forts with the wooden points all
around. You probably thought them points was for Indians.
But that’s stupid! ‘Cause Indians know about doors. [snip for brevity] But
Americans couldn’t live in forts forever. You couldn’t
just build one big fort around America. How would you go
to the beach?

That’s surprisingly relevant for 20+-year-old lyrics, and its from this lyrics site in case you want to follow up…

 
 

The next phase in border control technology will be to detach the United States from the rest of the globe with a giant US-shaped cookie cutter and launching America itself into space.

It will be powered by Americans’ own sense of self-righteousness and 51% of Americans will never notice that the rest of the world is millions of miles away – the rest will write scathing blog entries.

 
 

We used to think that oceans would protect us. After 9/11, now we know the truth. It shoulda been walls all along.

 
 

@Rupert Garry: Shirley you mean “Manuel ascent”.

 
 

Yeah – they’re tellin’ us now that the wall’s ta keep the Meskins out, but it’s really to keep US in.

Really, most Mexicans come over as tourists anyway, and then overstay their visas. So, what’re they gonna do next, say that Mexicans aren’t allowed to visit?

 
 

Maybe we could solve the problem by setting up an exchange program with Mexico. They send us their people willing to do long hourse of backbreaking labor for very little money, and we’ll send them our drug addicted wingnut talk radio hosts.

It’s win-win.

 
 

@Rupert Garry: Shirley you mean “Manuel ascent”.

Indeed, Sebastian, as well as Chico, Hernando, and Reynaldo ascent. We’ll keep Jennifer Lopez, though. She has money and boobs.

And stop calling me Shirley. You liberals never got over Macho Grande.

 
 

We should keep Jennifer Lopez because she’s callipygous.

 
 

thanks i like to rite my thot on the internets it helps me unwind after a busy day

 
 

Cause it’s not like Mexico, with over 6000 miles of coastline, has any place to lauch boats.

 
 

No quieren Salma Hayek, muchachos? Ella es mexicana tambien.

 
 

I’m 90% sure Jennifer Lopez is Puerto Rican, not Mexican.

 
 

YEs, JLo is Puertorican, & I believe she grew up in Brooklyn.

 
 

j-lo… from da bronx.

 
Chris Moorehead
 

Of course the function of the wall is to keep Americans in. Similarly on the northern border, the new requirement that one needs a passport to enter the USA won’t affect Canadians – we all have passports. But it will keep Americans from visiting Canada, since they’ll need US passports to be admitted back into the USA.

My US expatriate wife is convinced that the purpose of the new legislation is to keep American women from coming to Canada to get abortions once they’ve been outlawed in the USA. Her track record on such predictions is disturbingly high.

 
 

As always, the answer to these questions and issues can be found in the movies.
Via the Truman Show, we build a giant DOME and not a wall.

Second, the classic “Escape From New York” teaches us that we keep people from overstaying their visas by implanting bombs in their necks, timed to go off when the visa expires and remove it if and when they leave on time.

 
 

hehehe…

Shoot America into space. That was my idea!

Why doesn’t that implant in my head — the one that automatically transfers all my thoughts onto the internets — work?

I guess I shouldnta made it from 40 year old pinball machine parts I found in a box in the basement.

Besides, why a fence? I would dig a 20 foot wide trench all around the country, fill it with gas and set it ablaze, let them try to cross that!!1!!

 
Houdini's Ghost
 

I like your thinking Jillian, but what if the Mexislamofasciberals get their hands on magic leaves that allow them to fly right over our barriers!?! Even worse, the dreaded Tanuki suit would allow them to fly over the barrier, turn to stone, drop on our precious blonde American heads and then take our jobs. Of course, you head-in-the-sand liberals will say it’s the Italians who have perfected these techniques. I say, what one mustachioed people do, another mustachioed people will emulate.

 
 

First off, they’re called “spixicans.”

Secondly, why does the wall have to be green? Doesn’t that intimate some kind of eco-fascist mandate? Whose side are you on?

 
 

I agree. It should be a nice shade of muave.

 
 

OT

Aravosis names Colbert “Sexiest Man Alive”

 
 

And that, Houdini’s Ghost, is why the Minutemen are so important. They can stand on the walls, with helmets on their heads and a non-stop supply of hammers to throw at any Spanislamexicommunists that try to sneak over. And never underestimate the stopping power of a few well-placed Bullet Bills.

 
 

And when the brave Minutemen (teeny men?) try to give chase, furiously blowing their whistles and shouting in English, the devious Messican interlopers will try to duck beneath la scala and give their pursuers 20 years of bad luck, no?

Ay yi yi! Mi burro.

 
freddy's fender
 

Have you posted this for Dr. BLT yet, Jose? I didn’t see the post anywhere at Sadly, No!

Hey, let’s leave immigrants like M.M. alone. Haven’t you heard Dr. BLT’s new song? It’s a retro-rap dance-trance pro-immigration blog tune inspired and adapted from Neil Sedaka’s original song:

The Immigrant
words and music by Dr. BLT and DJ EJ (c)2006
http://www.drblt.com/music/theimmigrant.mp3

It’s his follow up to this one:

United 93 (unofficial movie theme)
words and music by Dr. BLT (c) 2006
http://www.drblt.com/music/unitedninetythree.mp3

or visit:
http://www.drblt.com

Dr. BLT is responsible for these releases, but couldn’t decide whether to release The Immigrant at a conservative site, or this, his favorite liberal site. It was between being accused of being a traitor, or being accused of shameless self-promotion, so he opted for the later, but after nearly withdrawing the release because of being overwhelmed by intense shame.

 
 

Wow, Doc–you’ve developed new nic/personality diarrhea or something. Trying to rope-in the newbies, perhaps?

 
 

Good guess, Marq, but these are just people pretending to pretend to be me. Just ignore them, and like all good trolls, they will go away.

 
 

Slurp harder, Hindy!

Free Advice for President Bush The President hasn’t asked for my advice, but here it is anyway. You know how the Democrats are always after you to admit that you made a mistake? You’ve wisely ignored them; they don’t…

 
 

Slurp harder, Hindy!

Free Advice for President Bush The President hasn’t asked for my advice, but here it is anyway. You know how the Democrats are always after you to admit that you made a mistake? You’ve wisely ignored them; they don’t…

 
 

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