“The mauve ones are boys . . .

betsy_schlussel
. . . and the white ones are girls, and the blue ones are
just little sillies who are not sure what they are.”

Shorter Frau Debbie Schlüssel von Flügelhorn
Tinkerbell Gone Butch: Disney Revamps Glamorous Nymph Into Tomboy

  • Disney has turned Tinkerbell into a lesbo to appease the Islamofascist terrorists.

‘Shorter’ concept created by Daniel Davies and perfected by Elton Beard. We are aware of all Internet traditions.™


 

Comments: 190

 
 
 

May I say, your 18th century-portrait Photoshops have all been just great lately. As why shouldn’t they, when the wingers ‘shopped in all have 18th-century attitudes. And educations.

 
 

Don’t clap for Debbie.

 
 

…and cobwebby vages to boot.

 
 

As I always say, matriarchical societies die.

…clap if you don’t want your mother to die! (or worse, become a retrospective lesbian!)

 
 

Schlussel links to the new movie’s Amazon page, which includes still images and video of Tinker Bell in that little dress Schlussel so likes. The outfit she object to looks like travel gear.

 
 

From the article : “Oh, and now, there’s this stupid-looking visor/hat contraption, which I predict will, someday in the future, morph into a hijab.”

From the comments : “Haven’t you noticed the subliminal political message in the new Tinkerbell’s face? It’s Hillary Clinton at age 7. Just look at that pompous smirk!”

They really have some issues, don’t they?

Here was me, watching Tinkerbell for the first time with my kids last night, thinking “Impressive that Disney had a girl being an engineer without defeminising her at all.” Shows what I know, eh?

 
 

So, um, masculine Tinkerbell is still Tinkerbell, just, you know, dressed warmly.

Debbie, I don’t know if you realize this, but women are still women even if they wear jackets! It’s true! You’d think, being a woman, you’d realize that.

Incidentally, as a father of a girl and a resident of Minnesota, I tend to think “wear some warmer clothes when it’s cold” is a useful message for her to learn. And if my daughter grows up to be a lesbian, at least she’ll be a comfortable one.

 
 

Tinkerbell’s “cute strapless green minidress” is to Debbie Sclussel as tentacle porn is to Jonah Goldberg.

Discuss.

 
 

So showing little girls a tiny lady wrapped up in warm clothes will make them lesbians, but showing them a tiny lady wearing a short, tight dress with shows more than it covers is a one-way ticket to straightsville?

 
 

WHICH shows.

 
Chicago City Comptroller
 

“As I always say, matriarchical societies die.”

Really Debbie? You ALWAYS say that? Just what sort of conversations does she have that this regularly comes up? And how many “matriarchical” societies have there been anyway?

 
 

For someone who thinks lesbians are icky, she sure is upset that Tink is showing less skin.

 
 

Uhm Debbie, Tinkerbell is a fairy…

WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?

 
 

I for one share Ms Schuessel’s concerns about androgynous cartoon characters. When I look at pictures of Tinkerbell, I want to be sure that those funny feelings I get are entirely hetero.

…and cobwebby vages to boot.
I was going to quote something relevant from Mauricio Santos-Lobos’ “The Spider Glyph in Time” but my copy has mysteriously disappeared.

 
 

More skin on HBO!!

 
 

The Ho’s other nick is Tink(erbell). He is not, as far as I know, a lesbian. I hope not, dats fo sho.

 
 

So, Debbie, what are you trying to tell us? I’ve seen you on Maher in your black leather jacket, and you ain’t all that, um, delicate, know what I mean?

 
 

…I hope she doesn’t start to twig to Peter Pan and the lost boys. (not to mention Captain Hook and Smee)

 
 

If she freaks out this easily over perceived gender identity issues, I would love to witness the cosmic meltdown if she were to see the 1935 Katharine Hepburn/Cary Grant film ‘Sylvia Scarlett’…

 
 

Did not trust the shorter. But I’ll be damned if that wasn’t actually what she said.

 
 

Oh, God, I thought the restraining order would stop this!

Please, do NOT encourage Ms. Schlussel. She has been following my career, my clothing, my comings-and-goings… let’s just say it, she’s been following ME for far, far too long.

Truth be told, I’m wearing that new outfit so I don’t have to feel Debbie Schlussel’s leering, lascivious reptilian eyes feasting on my skin even one second longer! Oh, god! Oh, GOD! Will this horrible woman ever stop? She’s everywhere I go, and her lustful, slobbering gaze makes me want to shower so much I scrub my flesh off my very bones.

 
 

Lil Debbie probably never got over watching Mary Martin playing “Peter Pan”.

 
 

“I’ve seen you on Maher in your black leather jacket, and you ain’t all that, um, delicate, know what I mean?”

Lil’ Debbie is stone butch. She still remembers that day she came home from school and proudly told her mom “Mom! I can beat up all the boys in my class!”

 
 

Actually, the comments are even more fun.

I live in San Diego, Ca., the Wife and I took our six year old granddaughte to see Disney on Ice, this past fri. 10-9-09, and the first one out on the ice was Tinkerbell, she was wearing her little tiny mini skirt and her great big smile, waving to all the kids, my granddaughter has also seen Disneys Song of the South, and when I find it I will also read to her Little Black Sambo. Have no fear Debbie the righteous will win out.

But remember, the Republicans are not raaaaaacist. The proof is that they spell racist with extra “a”s.

 
 

I thought Republicans were opposed to tarty tramps in miniskirts? Shoving their sin in Children’s faces? Or?

 
 

“Gone is the cute strapless green dress, the magic wand, and very visible angel wings.”

Veiled PENIS reference.

“Gone are the girly shoes, and now, instead, there are lace up boots reminiscent of the Jolly Green Giant, Robin Hood, or an elf.”

Tinkerbell is high elf with great spell binding powers. Do not piss her off. She will fuck. you. up.

“No, your mother doesn’t wear hiking boots. Your Tinker Bell Debbie Schlussel does.”

fixqed

 
 

tarty tramps in miniskirts? Shoving their sin in Children’s faces?
And thrusting their liberal views down our throats.
I’ll be in my bunk.

 
 

Trust the shorter. Please. For the children.

 
 

Debbie Schlussel needs to eat a Wheat Thin and shut the fuck up.

 
 

“This isn’t about putting your girls in a less sexually-saturated world.

Uhhh, yeah, it kinda is. This is Dominionist owned and operated Disney after all.

“It’s about putting them in a more emasculated one, where the men are girls and the Tinker Bells are men.”

Masculinizing Tinkerbell is emasculating her and she’s MINE. Don’t touch her.

 
 

Don’t let Debbie see the New Disney’s Marketing Plan.

Debbie’s right (Believe it or shove it!) Disney is going hijab soon: It’s going to be edgy!

If the Marvel deal was a bold move by Iger to grab hold of the demographic that Disney has the most trouble attracting — young men — then Cook’s abrupt departure was a sign that the studio would soon be in the hands of someone without any strong ties to Disney’s storied, safe-as-milk past.

Nothing is more attractive to young men than lesbian fairies!! Or is it fairy lesbians?

 
 

Angel wings? Has Debbie ever actually seen a picture of Tinkerbell? Because those “very visible” wings are clearly fairy/butterfly wings.

Debbie reminds me of that guy at Big Hollywood who decried the libtardification of GI Joe and talked about how “GO JOE” resonated deep in his consciousness, along with the face of Ronaldus Magnus.

 
 

For my money, Debbie is the most vile of all the wingnut women. She does not seem to have any pleasant traits, cheerful attitudes, or human warmth. The word “mean” pretty much sums her up. I’m glad she doesn’t have any kids.

 
 

…my granddaughter has also seen Disneys Song of the South, and when I find it I will also read to her Little Black Sambo.

Uh oh. I have a feeling some of Debbie’s readers are not gonna be overjoyed with Disney’s newest animated movie and heroine.

 
 

Annnnnnd Debbie’s comments come through again:

“my granddaughter has also seen Disneys Song of the South, and when I find it I will also read to her Little Black Sambo. Have no fear Debbie the righteous will win out.”

“Forget Paris Hilton playing Tinkerbell, how about Ahhhnold Schwarzenegger playing Tinkerbell? He just signed two bills to recognize HOMOSEXUAL marriage from other states (which is an oxy moron because marriage by definition couples two opposites, HOMO is of one) and made May 22 Harvey Milk Day? I guess Ahhhnold get his fill of Milk on that day.”

And my fav:

“It’s Hillary Clinton at age 7.”

Tinkerbell is Hitlery!

 
 

IIRC, Tinkerbell is described in teh book as having room in her head for only one thought at a time. Submitted without further comment.

She is also described as being “slightly inclined to embonpoint”. For a while I was under the impression that this was a form of embroidery.

 
 

“As I always say, matriarchical [sic] societies die. They simply don’t have staying power.”

But I’ve staying power baby! If you know what I mean and I think you do….

(please come back)

 
 

Tinkerbell is described in teh book as having room in her head for only one thought at a time.

No WONDER Lil’ Debbie is so impressed by her. That’s one-half more thought than Debbie can muster at one moment.

And I too love their comments about how it’s OBVIOUSLY Hillary. Issues much, Lil’ Debbie commenters?

 
 

“It’s Hillary Clinton at age 7.”

Tinkerbell is Hitlery!

Well then of COURSE she’s a lesbo. I guess Tiger Lily is her “personal adviser and under secretary” IYKWIMAITYD. She also killed Vince Hook and made it LOOK like the alligator did it!

 
Xecklothxayyquou Gilchrist
 

I dunno, “masculine” Tinkerbell still looks pretty girly to me, but I suppose I have that DFH ability to recognize women-creatures as such even when they’re not wearing miniskirts.

Though I have to say one thing I have appreciated about Tinkerbell is that, unlike most Disney womens, she has some junk in the trunk.

 
Xecklothxayyquou Gilchrist
 

she has some junk in the trunk.

…aha, hence the “embonpoint” thing in the books that SC mentioned. Gotcha.

 
Ron Mael's Moustache
 

So its okay if Photoshop “revamps” the hell out of *someone’s* banner picture, rendering them unrecognizable?

But the revamp of a FICTIONAL CHARACTER is wrong?

I get it.

 
 

…the wingers ’shopped in all have 18th-century attitudes. And educations.

Now, don’t be insulting the 18th century like that. It has done nothing to deserve such an odious comparison!

 
 

If you’re a parent who thinks the new covered up version is a welcome change in a sexualized world, think again. Tinker Bell has been wearing a skimpy dress for decades (watch the slide show). That’s what nymphs who fly around with magic wands do.

This my favorite line. Its combination of authority and inanity is striking.

 
 

Schlussel has revealed that the Maoist liberal Muslims at Disney are simultaneously desexualizing and sexualizing everything everywhere in an attempt to provoke a complete society-wide sexual psychocosomosomatical breakdown that will result in Burt Prelutsky becoming Michelle Obama’s love gimp.

 
 

She’s upset because Tink is LESS tarted up? Hummmm.

 
 

Tinkerbell is not emo or punk;
She possesses some junk in her trunk.
Her skirt, which is scanty,
Lacks visible panty;
If you want me I’ll be in my bunk.

 
Xecklothxayyquou Gilchrist
 

Her skirt, which is scanty,
Lacks visible panty;
If you want me I’ll be in my bunk.

Golfest of claps to you, SC.

Though I think you’ll find that there is at least one panty shot in the original Peter Pan.

…I’m an anime geek and highly attuned to that type of fan service. So sue me.

 
 

Some material for Schlussel to work with. In Disney’s book series on Pixie Hollow, every fairy has a special talent. Tinker Bell’s talent is for fixing and making things. She fixes pots and pans and creates new, useful objects out of others’ refuse. She’s a tinker, get it? In one book, Tinker Bell loses her special hammer. She has another one but she left it at Peter Pan’s place, so she has to go on a trip to get her tool.

 
 

NSFW or for decent people:

Disney Porn Blog
Free hot disney porn pictures and videos collection!

No further posting from me, as I will be “watching USC beat up some Catholics,” if you follow my drift. Eat it, Anchoress!!

 
 

watching USC beat up some Catholics

Trojans are rubbers!

 
 

Now this is hilarious! With double the Crazy!

The commenters also seem to be perplexed about the idea of Mary Martin and Kathy Rigby playing Peter Pan onstage (and one of them seems to be unaware that when he saw Mary on his TeeVee it was a taping of her stage show), as if it were some Liberal gender-bending plot. Women have been playing the role of Peter since Barrie’s play debuted.

And Debbie seems to be arguing for giving little girls Tinkerbelle in a slutty outfit (a revealing strapless dress and marabou-trimmed high-heeled mules?) as a role model, instead of wearing more modest and practical attire.

I love the way now “modesty” has suddenly become scarey and MOOOOSLIM. Goodness knows these folks look pretty menacing and Jihaddy!

 
 

my granddaughter has also seen Disneys [sic] Song of the South

Ah yes, a black man helps a white boy by telling him myths about a trickster god. No wonder your granddaughter thinks you’re an uptight, boring old coot.

when I find it I will also read to her Little Black Sambo

I’d love to see that. “Hey, this kid is from India. Where’s Little Black Sambo, goddangit?”

Have no fear Debbie the righteous will win out.

Once we figure out how to stop scoring own goals.

 
 

Eat it, Anchoress!!

Sinner.

 
 

From J—’s link:

All around Tink lay her tinkering tools: basket full of rivets, scraps of tin, pliers, iron wire, and swatches of steel wool for scouring a pot until it shone. On the walls hung portraits of some of the pans and ladles and washtubs Tink had mended.

Totally masculinized! I bet she uses the pliers & steel wool to emasculate men. And Debbie’s not like that.

 
 

And from g’s link:

Why do almost all the dresses have a “nursing option?” It’s as if women are to be used as nothing but brood hens!

 
 

Tinkerbell has been tinkering since Barrie made her up.

Don’t tell Debbie though. Mentioning that Tinkerbell was originally a character in a book (one written for children and at a time when NO ONE showed that much skin) will only confuse her.

Actually, mentioning books in any capacity will confuse Debs, but you know what I mean.

 
 

In one book, Tinker Bell loses her special hammer.

My magic hammer. Let me show you it. When I rub it, it gets bigger.

 
 

All around Tink lay her tinkering tools: basket full of rivets, scraps of tin, pliers, iron wire, and swatches of steel wool

Sounds like my kind of girl. Newsletter?

 
 

If you look at the original illustrations for Barrie’s books, all the fairies wear long flowing gowns. Including Tinkerbell.

It’s Peter who’s the scantily-clad slut.

 
 

I want to see Meghan McCleavage star as Tinkerbell.

 
 

“nursing option?” […] brood hens!
It does not work quite like that, city boy.

 
 

Tinkerbell has been tinkering since Barrie made her up.

Thanks, Arky.

 
 

I challenge Debbie to name one matriachal society from human history. But Amazons do not count, because there is no hard evidence for their existence (yes, archaeologists did find graves of women buried with weapons. The prevailing explanation at this time is that they were Scythian women, b/c that matches textual evidence about Scyths of both genders beating the shit out of whoever crossed them).

 
 

No, not quite, Mr. Rural Bumpkin. Mixed drinks no, mixed metaphors, yes!!

 
 

“Mares,” then, if you insist. Although I suspect most of those modest yet feminine wimmen act more like fowl than mammals.

 
 

tarty tramps in miniskirts? Shoving their sin in Children’s faces?
And thrusting their liberal views down our throats.
I’ll be in my bunk.

SmutClyde! You’re a Browncoat!

 
 

Another commenter over there:

“Maybe in the next incarnation, Captain Hook will look more like Perez Hilton without a wardrobe change.”

He clearly is not familiar with Cyril Ritchard’s interpretation of the stage role of Hook.

 
 

Flying Fox: I’m assuming she’s referring to the deathless historical claim that early human socities were matriarchal, agricultural worshippers of female earth goddesses, and that these societies were displaced by patriarchal, pastoral worshippers of male sky gods. It’s a theory with both leftish and rightish adherents.

 
 

Shiny!

 
 

Tinkerbell never looked better than she did in May, 1967. Nobody ever managed the delicate interface of restraint and sheer nastiness than Woody. Many have tried (Bill Stout came close), but there is only One.

 
 

And Debbie seems to be arguing for giving little girls Tinkerbelle in a slutty outfit … as a role model, instead of wearing more modest and practical attire.

She’s arguing that and she’s arguing the opposite. She’s saying that the de-sluttification of Tinkerbell is bad, but that Hollywood-inspired sexualization is also bad. Even by wingnut standards, the post is amazingly self-contradictory and incoherent… which gives it great entertainment value.

 
 

Giving Tinkerbell a cute little feather-trimmed cocktail hat is advocating matriarchy??

Has she written any columns about Mulan?? How does Debbie feel about that Islamofascist Princess Jasmine?

Will she be on alert for MOOSLIM-friendly imagery in upcoming productions of The Nutcracker’s Arabian Dance this December?

Truly deranged.

 
 

This may qualify for SASQ, but do these people have nothing better to do than sit around and dream up stuff to be outraged about?

Tinkerbell puts on pants and it means Disney sold out to the Taliban? Really? REALLY? Jesus wept.

 
 

Say, looks as if one needn’t register chez Debbie any more! Minions, do your stuff!

Just plain fucking stupid, ignorant & dumb:

Oh, and now, there’s this stupid-looking visor/hat contraption, which I predict will, someday in the future, morph into a hijab.

Beyond the sheer idiocy of the “hijab” statement, even my wretched over-fifty & were never that good when I was younger eyes can see that the “visor/hat contraption” is a fucking GD LEAF!! Like a damn fairy in the woods would wear.

 
 

That picture. Now I know what Schlussel has always reminded me of: Melissa Joan Hart, gone horribly wrong.

Still don’t know who that woman at the top of her website is though.

 
 

In news that combines sexualisation AND creeping islamification, Pamela Anderson will start her pantomime career in the role of the Genie in Aladdin.

If I had Pamela Anderson coming out of my lamp every time I rubbed it then SHUT UP SMUT

 
 

The Trojans have, by the way, rubbed out the Catholics.

Hooray, there is no Gawd!!

 
 

It’s been mentioned once or twice before in this thread, but it bears repeating: Tinkerbell still has her classic skimpy dress in the new movie. Not that a wingnut blogger would take five seconds to fact-check before bitching about the Islamoliberocialistosexual agenda.

 
 

Will she be on alert for MOOSLIM-friendly imagery in upcoming productions of The Nutcracker’s Arabian Dance this December?

Yes. SA2SQ #127,208

but do these people have nothing better to do than sit around and dream up stuff to be outraged about?

No. SA2SQ #127,209

“I see a thing, therefore I am outraged” is the fReichblogger’s motto.

 
 

Just when you think you’ve seen it all, along comes Debs to ladle out more of teh fulminating crazies.

 
 

I know there are no time outs in the Culture War, but really, monographs on Tinkerbell’s outfit ?! I have a real issue, and that is this syndrome of hot actresses ‘uglifying’ themselves for a shot at Oscar. Michele Monaghan is now a trucker, Charlize Theron played a coal miner, and Nicole Kidman had a prosthetic proboscus. This shit must stop! Beautiful women in the movies are either prostitutes or physicists, nothing in between.

 
 

Though I think you’ll find that there is at least one panty shot in the original Peter Pan.

I’ve heard that in “Who Framed Roger Rabbit,” there’s a frame, visible only on stop-action DVD, that shows Jessica Rabbit in all her panty-less glory. Does anyone know–true or urban legend?

 
The Kid from Kounty Meath
 

I’m pretty sure Snopes confirms the Jessica Rabbit thing, BS (unfortunate abbreviation when we’re discussing something being true, but eh). I’ve also heard there was a topless woman’s photo slipped into “The Rescuers”.

 
 

Beautiful women in the movies are either prostitutes or physicists, nothing in between.

Or sometimes both.

 
 

Beautiful women in the movies should GET TO THE CHOPPER!

 
 

Bitter Scribe: it’s on Snopes. Conclusion: well, a couple frames sort of look like that, in the sense that there’s a vague dark patch in the nether regions. It might as well just be dark underwear, or a coloring error.

 
 

So let’s see? 18th century attitudes of christian religion, patriotism and white nationalism vs 21st century attitudes of anti-americanism, secular humanism, historical revisionism and multiculturalism?

I think i’ll take the eighteenth century attitudes which are the foundation of our Republic and which gave birth to American exceptionalism over the current pc attitudes of self loathing anyday.

 
 

Also, when a gun falls on the floor, beautiful women are temporarily hypnotized by it, but eventually shooting it accurately at any distance or in any situation. Beautiful women may spend an entire movie not driving a car once, but flying a damaged helicopter at the end.

 
 

Who’s self-loathing and anti-american? I’m proud that our president got the Nobel Peace Prize, how about you?

 
 

Your black “messiah” won the nobel peace prize by selling out American interests and stabbing our Israeli allies in the back. The Norwegian communists in charge of the award might as well have given it to Ahmadenanutjob.

 
The Very Reverend Battleaxe of Knowledge
 

Looks like we got a live one here. Of course, historical ignorance is the basis of the fReichtards’ philosophy, so I guess it’s no surprise he’s confusing the 18th century with the 17th or the 19th. Hey fucknut: the 18th century was the Age of Enlightenment. They would not be interested in your campaign to send us back to the 17th century Witch Trials and Wars of Religion. If we could only bring you retarded motherfuckers into the 18th century (never mind the 21st) our work would be done.

 
 

Maybe in the next incarnation, Captain Hook will look more like Perez Hilton without a wardrobe change.

Yeah, because pirates never, ever have looked the least bit flamboyantly gay.

 
The Very Reverend Battleaxe of Knowledge
 

And since Ahmedinejad signed the agreement to send most of Iran’s spent fuel out of the country for reprocessing, he would have deserved the prize, just as much as Obama did. But of course, he didn’t negotiate an agreement with the Russians to reduce the number of warheads in the world by 1/3, so there’s that…

 
 

18th century attitudes of christian religion, patriotism and white nationalism

Of course, throughout most of the 18th century, those patriotic Christians and white people were slaughtering each other by the thousands.

 
The Very Reverend Battleaxe of Knowledge
 

Yeah, because pirates never, ever have looked the least bit flamboyantly gay.

“But I don’t want to be a pirate!”

 
 

Less obvious trolls, please.

Paul Mantarakis? Sheesh.

 
 

You are mistaken my misguided liberal friend. What you are referring to was the philosophy of the failed French Revolution which was about as different from the American Revolution as night is from day.

The American Revolution was in fact, no revolution at all, rather it was a war for independence and a conservative reaction against the totalitarian policies of the British Parliament in order to conserve the colonists rights as Englishmen which were being denied to them and were very much grounded in tradition.

 
 

Paul Mantarakis = Edmund Burke lite without the stroke material about Marie-Antoinette. Hey, Paul, you pity the plumage and forget the dying bird. Let us, sir, reason together.

 
 

so what do YOU think about the new Tinkerbell, Paul?

 
 

Concepts which, apparently, have nothing to do with the Enlightenment:

– Freedom of speech
– Freedom of the press
– Separation of Church and State
– Freedom of Conscience
– Rejection of Divine Right to rule
– Equality of all citizens before the law

What the Enlightenment was apparently entirely about:

– Chopping people’s heads off because they wore knee breeches.

 
 

I think i’ll take the eighteenth century attitudes…over the current pc attitudes of self loathing anyday.

I don’t see what you have against self-loathing. Everyone else loathes you, so why not join in and make it unanimous?

 
 

I always wondered why Tinkerbell had a name that had to do with metalsmithing. ISTR it’s completely unjustified in Disney. Interesting that it’s in Barrie…

 
 

…and when I find it I will also read to her Little Black Sambo.

Yes, about that…as politically incorrect as it is to say it, I mourn the loss of Little Black Sambo, at least my Little Golden Book of Little Black Sambo, because I loved it so much as a child. I still have the pictures in my mind – Sambo’s beautiful little red coat, little blue pants, his awesome shoes with the upturned-toes. As a little kid reading the book, there wasn’t anything racist involved in it – it was a story about this little boy and his beautiful clothes, and how he turned tigers into butter.

I also confess to owning a “flip-doll”, one of those dolls with a long skirt that, when flipped, reveals another doll under the skirt. It’s like Catdog – two dolls in one. Anyway, the one I have was purchased by my grandmother sometime in the 50’s in Florida. One of the dolls is a blond girl with braids in a sunbonnet. Flip it over, and it’s a mammy with a red headwrap. It was in the toybox at my grandmother’s & we played with those toys every summer when we went to the farm. It was about the only thing I wanted out of her things when she passed. And yes, it’s a racist doll, but again, I loved the mammy doll as a child – with her headwrap she was so exotic-looking. I thought she was so pretty – and this is a stuffed-cloth doll, mind you. I never flipped the doll over to play with the boring little blond girl – it was the mammy doll I loved. So now I have the racist doll.

It’s kind of a weird thing, having a very positive association with something you’re supposed to find appalling.

 
 

The American Revolution was in fact, no revolution at all

Oh, please entertain us with your special, creative definition of “revolution”!

 
 

Like the 18th century didn’t have self-loathing. Hell, they embraced The Sorrows of Young Werther.

 
 

Yeah, because pirates never, ever have looked the least bit flamboyantly gay.

It’s all right Captain, we always? knew you was a whoopsie!

 
 

Did I hit a wrong button? I’d swear I sent this before, with a note that Tinkerbell never looked better than she did in May of 1967 in the pages of The Realist. Is WP F-ing me?

Well, I can always go listen to Lydia Lunch on the old iPod. Little orphans running through the bloody snow! Little orphans running through the bloody snow! Yeah.

btw, I’ve seen frames from Roger Rabbit and The Rescuers. The nude in the latter is visible enough in a still, though fuzzy (not like that). Poor Disney animators. Who knew you could pause a VCR?

 
The Very Reverend Battleaxe of Knowledge
 

Sorry, fucktard—history fail! The Age of Enlightenment basically ended with the French Revolution. The Founding Fathers were completely imbued with Enlightenment principles. They couldn’t have realized that darker times lay ahead, in the 19th century and then late 20th century recrudescence of religious crapola.

The French Revolution and the Terror are the kind of things that happen when elites dig their heels in and hold up the locomotive of change for too long. Just a little friendly advice.

 
 

In news that combines sexualisation AND creeping islamification, Pamela Anderson will start her pantomime career in the role of the Genie in Aladdin.

Huh. Not a lot of Americans do panto (to be honest, I didn’t know ANY had).

And to bring it back to Peter Pan, sort of, Brian Blessed was apparently a smashing Captain Hook back in 2007. There’s a funny promo interview with him here.

 
 

The Separation of Church and State is one of the biggest myths in American political history. The statement in fact appears no where in the United States Constitution or Bill of Rights but rather in a private letter written by Thomas Jefferson to the Danbury Baptists which has been take out of context by those seeking to push their own radical agenda.

The first amendment’s freedom of religion clause merely allows Americans to worship God as they choose and prevents the Federal government from establishing a corrupt national church such as they had in England. In no way does the First Amendment prohibit religious expression in government as is evidenced by George Washington declaring a national day of prayer and thanksgiving and one of the first acts of congress which was to order the publishing of Bibles in Indian tongues in order to convert the pagan tribesmen to Christianity.

In fact the First Amendment’s restriction on a national church was binding only on the federal government not the state governments. Many states had official religions for another half a century after the constitution and bill of rights were ratified. The official religion of Massachusetts for example was congregationalism.

 
 

Oh, and about Tinkerbell getting “butched up”?

Shouldn’t Schlussel be more concerned about the twink-boy Peter Pan himself? Female wearing warm clothing = ticket to Lesboland while lithe, pre-pubescent boy in a minidress and tights = totally butch? WTF is up with that?

 
 

No no no please let’s not get derailed! Isn’t Debbycakes talking about a fairy being insufficiently slutty for her taste so much more interesting than yelling about Enlightenment philosophy with another saul sockpuppet?

Or can we at least talk about butch tinsmithing fairies?

 
 

LBS comes from the halcyon days when the N-word was used to describe any dark-skinned person – Paul’s 18th century comes to mind.

And places dark-skinned people came from were interchangeable – Africa, India – whatEVer!

How could anyone be nostalgic for the 18th century – chamber pots, people of all ages drinking gin to stifle hunger pangs. People bathed once a year, even if they didn’t need it. Execution by beheading was for the nobility – ordinary people got drawn and quartered.

And health care? You nostalgic for the days when people went to a barber for health care?

 
 

FYWP! Is it the HTML to the link you don’t like? The attempt to be clever about it? Or will I look an hour from now and see three posts by me here?

Anyway, here it is as a flat URL: the Disneyland Memorial Orgy —

http://www.ep.tc/realist/74/12.html

Wallace Wood! (He didn’t like to be called Wally.) The Greatest! And probably the best rendition of Tinkerbell ever, hence its mention here. And if I hit Submit one more time and don’t see it, I give up for the night.

 
 

I’m not sure why so many people require validation of their faith from the federal government.

 
 

Face it: The American Revolution was a revolution of landowners & slave-holders, & was pretty damn conservative. There was talk of installing an American King, & so on.

 
 

The American Revolution was in fact, no revolution at all

Thus, the reason it’s CALLED the “American Revolution”.

On the other paw, Paul Matarakis is, in fact, no Mantarakis at all.

 
 

I also confess to owning a “flip-doll”, one of those dolls with a long skirt that, when flipped, reveals another doll under the skirt. It’s like Catdog – two dolls in one

They still make those, though usually not as black girl and white girl anymore. Here’s a bunch of fairy tale-themed ones.

 
 

That Wally Wood (oops, sorry, Wallace) is hilarious.

 
 

Listen to Djur. SRSLY

 
 

Of course, throughout most of the 18th century, those patriotic Christians and white people were slaughtering each other by the thousands.

And the 19th. And a pretty big chunk of the 20th.

 
 

The biggest folly underlying fundie demands to marry church and state is this: the very same people who claim the government is corrupt, incompetent, and can do nothing right are the ones who insist that it should be involved in everyone’s salvation. So the people who insist that religious faith and personal salvation are the most important things in life are the same ones who want a corrupt and incompetent institution that can do nothing right to help them in their cause.

And it’s never yet occured to a single one of them.

 
 

“18th century attitudes of christian religion, patriotism and white nationalism.”

Christian religion? Ummm..okay, how to put this? Not only were the most hardcore philosophes *French* (sacre bleu!), but they were also DEISTS. Voltaire DESPISED organized religion, Christianity above all.

Jefferson? DEIST, dude. Not Christian. Ever looked at his Bible? It’s about four pages long once he edited all the irrational stuff out.

Patriotism? The Enlightenment was INTERNATIONAL in outlook; Montesquieu’s famous _Persian Letters_, for example, actually unfavorably compares 18th century French society to Persia’s.

White nationalism? Wha…? Once again, *Enlightenment.* Being *enlightened,* being cosmopolitan, being rational, using the scientific method…

Oh, what the hell am I doing? I have a dead plant less impervious to, you know, actual *facts.* Man, being a wingnut ensures a radically…simple..life, doesn’t it?

 
 

See, muffaroo decided the question. Tink didn’t wear panties.

 
 

I know hot miniskirted fairies are a more interesting subject, but I really would love to hear Saul, who is also called Paul, give us his definition of the word “revolution”. It should be very enlightening.

 
 

18th Century attitudes of Christian religion, patriotism and white nationalism.

 
 

Color version of Muffaroo’s link here (not as big).

Also, what he fuck-tuck-tuckin’ hell is WP up to today? Haven’t had a link preview correctly yet.

 
 

Jennifer said,

October 18, 2009 at 2:32 (kill)

well, Jennifer, if it can help the fundies beat and kill a few fags, and keep you wimmins preggers, they are willing to accept a bit of coercive help from the Big Bad Gubmint.

They’re funny that way.

 
 

Does anyone know how to jump to the bottom of a page on an iPhone so I don’t have to sit here like a fool swiping the screen for two minutes every time I refresh the page and it leaves me at the goddamned top!!!!!!! thx

 
 

Oh, and also:

In fact the First Amendment’s restriction on a national church was binding only on the federal government not the state governments. Many states had official religions for another half a century after the constitution and bill of rights were ratified.

An excellent opportunity to bring back this classic from Original Recipe World O’Crap.

 
 

Everybody who wants to merge church and state thinks it’s their church that’s going to get to do the merging. Certainly not those Catholics or those LDS people and not those other Baptists down the street that we disagree with.

Of course, if one of those other churches gets hold of the levers of power – they’re going to be well and truly fucked.

 
 

Can anyone tell me how to jump to the bottom of a page on iPhones without swiping the screen for a minute straight like a goddamned idiot? thx

 
 

The same people who can’t tolerate someone wearing a checkered scarf in public think it’s a good idea for the state to establish a religion.

 
 

By the way, according to that WOC list, North Dakota is the zombie state. So be sure to let ZRM know.

 
 

So who’s eating what tonight? We wanted to grill a steak, but everything was too expensive, so we got hamburger. We’re doing “patty melts” with rye bread and cheese and carmelized onions. I made a potato salad earlier in the day.

It’s hot as fuck, and muggy, too.

 
 

Just got back from our vacation in Canukistan. Had some leftover lentil soup and homemade bread.

 
Xecklothxayyquou Gilchrist
 

Yup, leftovers chez Gilchrist too.

 
 

Leftover chicken soup, salad AND pizza.

 
 

Honestly, is there any children’s world with more homoeroticism or gender bending than that of Peter Pan. I mean, the play has pretty much always been played with Peter being played by a woman and let’s not even get into Hook.

What’s next for the Debster, complaining about such random unforeseen additions as the subtext of the closet’s destructive force on gay people in Little Mermaid, gender-bending and feminism in Mulan, the rape of the natives in Pocahontas?

Those liberal adder type people totally ruining the original meaning of these classics with their filthy multiculturalism.

 
 

To be fair, cartoon characters do play an important role in establishing sexual orientation. It is now known, for instance, that most Furries imprinted on Dick Dastardly and Muttley at an early age.

 
 

Little Black Sambo is not lost, at least not if you can operate a computer. It’s for sale on Amazon, and so is The Complete Tales of Uncle Remus.

The only reason is wearing that tiny minidress is that they couldn’t get away with portraying her naked, and you know they wanted to, the pervs.

 
 

Leftover salmon, originally sautéed in olive oil w/ tomatoes & onions. Will nuke briefly, then mush w/ cream cheese & spread on a sesame seed encrusted bagel.

After that, an eight-ball to assuage further hunger & consciousness.

Bottoms up!

 
 

What’s next for the Debster

I’m waiting for her to turn on Disney XD and discover the homoeroticism of “Zeke and Luther.”

 
 

You know what I love? Debbie’s link to the movie on Amazon contains an AFFILITATE LINK. She may hate the movie but not enough to refuse to make money off any sales of it that come through her site.

 
 

Leftovers here, too. One of those weeks?

 
 

Jeez, J—, thanks for the warning. Been “enjoying” DisXD’s “Festival of Crummy ’80s & ’90s Marvel Animation” Suns. & Mons. from 0200-0500 PT, & seen many a promo for those two. The skaters, right? Wasn’t tempted to watch, & will absolutely not be tempted to now.

DisneyXD, by the way, being Disney’s attempt to expand their kid-vid demographic beyond “Princess” fascinated ‘tween girls. What will Debbie do?

 
Apple Pie Fucker, Jason Biggs
 

I wonder if Debbie is familiar with Alan Moore’s work.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lost_Girls

 
 

Paul Mantarakis said,

The Separation of Church and State is one of the biggest myths in American political history. [rest snipped]

Troll-o-meter: 0.5

Ho-hum. We’ve seen it before. Try to come up with something fresh and original.

 
 

Clicked the link to find out what the FUCK she’ going on about.

Really? you think THAT’S ‘masculine’? Wow. Which do you think is more butch, Debbie; the puffs on the booties, the mini dress/panty hose, or the pink feather in the hat?

 
 

Burger from the local burger joint: bison meat, blue cheese, bacon. And “Lord of the Rings” part 1. Hey Smut – how do I get to the Pip Mountains?

 
Xecklothxayyquou Gilchrist
 

Leftovers here, too. One of those weeks?

Must be. Lucky thing, too, since I’m too lazy to cook today. Interweb chatter about fairy panties is about my speed.

 
 

19. Maryland: Lapsed Catholics

Hooray! I won’t have to move.

 
 

Hawaiian Pizza (as commanded by the Invisible Pink Unicorn, blessings be upon her undetectable obviousness) and Caesar salad and Brio. Lemon meringue pie and coffee for dessert. A hit of Lagavulin right now.

I chose that meal specifically to appease the Mooslems. You know how much they love ham on pizza, having dessert, and single malt scotch. It was practically a Ramadam-licious Islamic feast.

 
 

Tink’s new outfit is quite obviously her old outfit with leggings, sleeves, knee-high pom-pom boots, a belt, and a shawl added to it. Oh, and that bitchin’ hat.

I quite like it, but her old dress is still there. What are you on about, Ms. Schlussel?

 
 

…or they’ve gone the way of the rest of Hollywood and are trying to make their feminine characters more masculine.

Number one at the box office right now? Couples Retreat.
Best Actress Oscars?
’08 Kate Winslet in The Reader
’07 Marion Cotillard as Edith Piaf
’06 Helen Mirren as Betty Saxe-Coburg
’05 Reese Witherspoon as June Carter
’04 Hillary Swank as a boxer.
Strong characters all, but other than Maggie Fitzgerald, hard to see a bunch of masculine characters in that list. But then again, Debbie Schlussel probably thought Million Dollar Baby was also an attempt to appease the Islamofascist hordes (’cause they lurve women’s boxing).

 
 

Dinner? BLT’s with the last of the home garden tomatoes. A little bit of slaw on the side. Sloshing it down with diet Dr. Pepper.

Too bad it’s the last of the homegrown. These have been especially tasty this year.

 
 

I quite like it, but her old dress is still there.
Not only – Tinkerbell wears the traditional outfit, without the kickass hat and hijab-like boots and leggings – in the very video Wiener Schlüssel is harrumphing at. She puts on the extra bits because she’s travelling. Or at least that’s what I got from the Lost Treasure preview.

 
 

I know I’m late to the party, but for goodness sake, Li’l Debbie has to be the stupidest person in the world (though each of her commenters is also bucking for that title).

 
 

I know I’m late to the party
You’re late to the party? I just patted myself on the back for pointing out the exact same thing J— did seven hours ago.

 
 

My memory of Peter Pan is fuzzy at best, but wasn’t Tink already a bit of a tomboy? Pointing to her as an icon of femininity is a bit bizarre, especially when you also have the Disney Princesses. They’re pretty damn girly, with the exceptions of Mulan, Jasmine, and Buttercup.

 
 

The last time I managed to muster any outrage about these corporate crimes was just over a year ago, when Google used its logo to mark the 50th anniversary of Paddington Bear.

 
Xecklothxayyquou Gilchrist
 

Oh, and that bitchin’ hat.

That hat is pretty goddam awesome. I need to find a really big leaf and make one of those for my wife.

 
 

It is now known, for instance, that most Furries imprinted on Dick Dastardly and Muttley at an early age.

To hear them talk, it was the Disney version of Robin Hood that did it. For the younger ones, Sonic the Hedgehog.

Andrew NP: since when did a Hanna-Barbera character become a Disney Princess?

 
 

I actually have a personal connection with the show Peter Pan, so it’s weird to see Debbie Schlussel fucking with it.

I give you all this:

Mary Martin singing “Neverland”

 
 

“I wonder if Debbie is familiar with Alan Moore’s work. ”

Do you mean that you missed her review of Watchmen a few months back? She said that anyone who watched it was a bad person–after watching it, for the record–and appeared to believe that Rorschach’s few comments disparaging liberals were an attempt to add balance to it all. It was all very beautiful. And way fewer assholes in the comments.

 
 

Every time I click on a Schlussel link, it’s just the same old da shiong la se la ch’wohn tian, just a real recipe for unpleasantness.

 
 

…where the men are girls and the Tinker Bells are men.

Umm, isn’t that a kind of tautological statement?

 
 

#

Teh Mighty Thor said,

October 18, 2009 at 0:12

In one book, Tinker Bell loses her special hammer.

My magic hammer. Let me show you it. When I rub it, it gets bigger.

Oh, you think you’re Thor? I’m not going to be able to walk thtraight ’til necktht Thaturday!

 
Republican tricks
 

http://hammerandsteele.com/

Put in the url of your choice and let Michael Steele explain to you how it’s changed.

 
 

I don’t really want to ponder why Schlussel wrote this column, because it would require imagining Schlussel in the Classic Tinkerbell costume on Halloween….

 
 

“Forget Paris Hilton playing Tinkerbell, how about Ahhhnold Schwarzenegger playing Tinkerbell? He just signed two bills to recognize HOMOSEXUAL marriage from other states (which is an oxy moron because marriage by definition couples two opposites, HOMO is of one) and made May 22 Harvey Milk Day? I guess Ahhhnold get his fill of Milk on that day.”

Y’know, a thought occurs to me: how do conservatives drink homogenized milk?

 
 

The same way they do everything else: with malice.

 
 

First Tinky Winky and now Tinkerbell…

Someone should check Tigger, he seems way too happy jumping around with his legs spread, and you never really get to know where his tail goes when be hits ground.

 
 

Why is everyone so upset about the “reinvention” of Tinkerbell from the original Disney interpretation of her, anyway? That Tinkerbell was a jealous psychopath who tried to engineer Wendy’s death, multiple times, for daring to be the object of Pan’s… I’d say affections, but it doesn’t sound appropriate in this case.

Reading the Kultur Kommandos in the comments section over there really makes me wonder at the time people have on their hands.

 
 

Here is an eerily similar costume, and one may judge its masculinity for oneself.

http://www.blog.joelx.com/the-peter-pan-man-pictures/2601/

 
 

North Dakota is the zombie state. So be sure to let ZRM know.

fuck a bunch of that.

I want to amend the list. Hawaii should be the zombie state. Besides, it is isolated by water, so you breathers will feel ‘safer’.

 
 

“Breathers” as a slur by zombies on the living=brilliant.

 
Xecklothxayyquou Gilchrist
 

That Tinkerbell was a jealous psychopath…

Indeed, and Disney films could do with more characters like that. The new Tinkerbell, from what little I’ve seen, is all gooshy and happy and nice, and what fun is that?

 
Xecklothxayyquou Gilchrist
 

…I think the best moment in recent Disneydom is the bit in Lilo and Stitch where Lilo matter-of-factly announces “my friends need to be punished.” That was some high-octane psycho.

 
 

Lil Debbie probably never got over watching Mary Martin playing “Peter Pan”.

That story in general has fucked up a lot of people. Jesus, what a giant stewpot of sexual confusion and gender issues it is. What was the author’s major malfunction?

 
 

For the younger ones, Sonic the Hedgehog.

“Bend over, Tails!”

Andrew NP: since when did a Hanna-Barbera character become a Disney Princess?

He meant this Disney princess.

And how many “matriarchical” societies have there been anyway?

I believe this matriarch would not be amused by your comment.

 
 

Amusingly, DS is now criticizing Meghan McCain for dressing too slutty. You can’t please some people.

 
 

Man I’m sorry, like my uncle says, Debbie Schuuuusel reminds me of Lisa Loopner–

 
 

Debbie needs many years of therapy.

 
 

#

LD said,

October 18, 2009 at 14:56

First Tinky Winky and now Tinkerbell…

Someone should check Tigger, he seems way too happy jumping around with his legs spread, and you never really get to know where his tail goes when be hits ground.

Yeah, I wonder what Lil Debs thinks about a certain rabbit, too.

 
 

I went over to Debbie’s site and posted on her thread about Meghan McCain’s Twitter picture. I suggested that Meghan should dress more like Tinkerbell. For some reason, my comment has disappeared.

 
Randy Diedrichson, Winner of the Design Competition
 

You fuckers! I am down to 10 minutes of political reading per day — news, blogs, humor — so I don’t go completely batshit. The four hours a day was killing me.

I reserve an entire 10 minutes just for Sadly, No during the course of the week. I was doing fine. Feeling better, even. Ignorance, gang. It is in fact bliss. Monday is “feed the bears” day and Sadly is my only stop.

Doing fine, just a quick glance at the humorous funnies. Then I saw this headline, and I thought, “you big silly-Billies, that cannot be,” and I clicked on the link and it was.

Tinkerbell, the jealous 2-inch tall moth creature (probably equipped with a cloaca, not a vagina,) from the animated motion picture Peter Pan — is a lesbian?

The evidence for which is she’s wearing calf-high boots and a leaf on her head?

I’m sorry, teh shrill is blowing my mind. I got a 20-minute dose today because of you people. And now I can’t erase from my mind the mental picture of Tinkerbell, reeking of absinthe, fluttering her tiny wings on some writhing barmaid’s engorged clitoris.

 
Illumninati Repton
 

Thanks Randy, now I’ve got that image in my mind, too.

I’ll be in my bunk.

 
 

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