Hee hee! Love the art.

Wish I had a better comment above but was trying to be first. Will do better, I promise.

Agreed, the artwork is nice.

But it would have been better if, instead of the ruff around his neck, it was a toilet seat. Which would have the added advantage of bringing Doug Watts out of the woodwork for yet another lecture about how immature we all are.

Just sayin’.

I would never let my daughter marry a line judge.

Although some of my closest friends are line judges.

And I certainly hope we never see the day when a line judge is elected president.

Because they lie.

I saw one lie on TV!

Not clicking through…believing the shorter…not clicking…

[tap tap… is this thing on?]

I nearly had to beat the crap out of a mouthy couple of young line judges on the bus the other day. They were technically thugs.

Brent certainly is right. Not a single media outlet commented on Kanye’s and Serena’s behavior. I only learned about their hateful dark actions thanks to my psychic connection to my people. In both incidences it was if a million white, whiney million voices suddenly cried out in terror and were suddenly silenced.

[tap tap… is this thing on?]

Don’t get me started (see last comment thread, and by now I am sure a series of my post attempts will have appeared–enjoy the parade!).

Yep, I clicked:

Had Wilson yelled that he was going to shove something down President Obama’s blankety-blank throat, then we’d have a similarity.

No, Brent, we wouldn’t, because one was a tennis player at a tennis match threatening a line judge, the other would be a congressman in Congress threatening the POTUS.

If Joe Wilson had jumped up to the podium during an Obama speech to Congress, stolen the microphone from the president, and suggested his election was a serious mistake? You envision the consequences.

No, Brent, because…

Aw, fuck it.

I didn’t know at first that it was a line judge Serena was yelling at; my wife had to tell me, because I’m line-judge blind. To me they look just like normal people.

And this of course all feeds into the Shorter Everything Bozell Has Ever Written: The only objectionable thing in the world is profanity. Except for Dick Cheney because shut up.

But it is true, the blacks always get a free pass for acting like animals by the liberal media, but freedom of speach by a Great American like Joe Wilson, speaking Truth To Power, and Power Usurped, is needing punishment?

You don’t speak the English too well. Whyncha go home, foreigner?

And liberals say they don’t understand us teabaggers, here in the heartland and how we are fed up with corrupt government? Understand this: the wind is rising.

I farted.

The next Civil War is coming and this time we will prevail, the forces of honor, and decency and hard work and God.

And then I came.

Socialests speach

As you’re typing, and you see a red line appear under a word, it means CHECK YOUR FUCKING SPELLING.

Christ….

Was it good for you?

It wuz at first but then I realizeded it was Momma again and not Denzel Washington liek in my dream.

Here’s the dirty little secret. MTV likes what West did. He’s their very own Dennis Rodman. It’s time the networks were held responsible for the outrages of their stars.

Nipplenipplenipple!

Okay, just to spell it out for you, I’m a parody troll.

Love,
Stop the Socialests

Condolences – I feel the same way about your Momma.

You liberals think you are so funny, while your not. You are eleites who have no idea how we think and beleive in the Heartland, and think we are stupid. Well, were not. It is you liberals who are stupid for beleiving Obama and his brainwashing, defedning this gangster at every turn becasye any bad comments are about him racist? Always playing the race car.

Oh you naughty, naughty, dirty naughty troll…

No, Trolly, the fact is (heh), if you think “socialests” is a word, you’re pretty fucking stupid.

Oh and where is the real birth certificate? Produce it! Otherwise we will not beleive him, and you liberals defending him are traitors to America. We want are country back!

And the free market, class war? Why do you hate a guy who makes a buck and tax it away by FORCE like the little red hen was? You are sick, shut up and work harder, dont take my money away to pay for abortions in the getto.

FREEDOM!

OBAMA, YOU LIE!

I’m disgusted and repulsed by the troll’s meltdown and… and I can’t look away.

A Aim Lobe You!

Comparing the House of Representatives to MTV Europe awards show bullshit & millionaire professional athletes taking their game maybe a little too seriously tells me that weird-beard better stop obsessively watching the tube all day & all night & all afternoon looking for something to faint over & go outside or read a book or have sex w/ someone besides himself, or something.

But NewsFluffers do link to Ace of Spades & Free Republic. No “pigs” there.

Wow. As I type, NBC4 (L. A.) is doing a lengthy (for tee vee news) story on anger, rage, & politics, featuring West, Williams & Wilson, as well as other town hall yada yada. Took them this long to respond to Bozo-El?

Imalitchoofinish, but I just wanna say I’m back to being for overheated rhetoric.

Brent Bozell: Town Scold. Lots of fun at parties.

Don’t go fucking with my parable, boy.

The whole point is that NO ONE would help me make the bread. It’s not as if the cow reaped the grain, the dog threshed it, the horse powered the grinding stone to grind it into flour, the pig helped mix the loaves, and then when it was done I said “MINE, ALL MIIIIIINNNNE!!!!! AHAHAHAHA” in the manner that your capitalist heroes do, after the workers produce a good or service while they sit back and rake off the profits of that labor.

In short, you can kiss my Little Red feathered ass.

Do we have any trolls that aren’t openly racist anymore? I mean besides that one guy who said Stormfront was a liberal site.

Do we have any trolls conservatives that aren’t openly racist anymore?

Fecksed.

However, Magic Eight Ball says: “Unlikely at this time.”

The next Civil War is coming and this time we will prevail

Too bad for you I’m not the gun-control kind of liberal.

Angry red hen has sworn a hendetta.

I hope it doesn’t lead to the assassination of David Hen-essy.

Too bad for you I’m not the gun-control kind of liberal.

“But Major! They’re the Screen Berets*!”

*Yours, no? Please accept this small token of my appreciation.

What’s a henway?

Thank you.

“Henway.”

What Pantload says after racing at top speed for sixteen feet, to the cabbie in Boston, while clutching two front-row seats behind home plate.

Yo Little Red Hen, I’m really happy for ya, Imma let you finish, but the ant and the grasshopper was the best worker/loafer fable of all time!
~

What’s a henway?

Oh, about 3 or 4 pounds.

Even if Applebee’s did have a sallad bar, which they dont, liberals wouldn’t eat their anyways cuz theys elityess plus theys want a sneese gourd which are a dragon the economy.

Infect my host, squibs!

Also.
~

I sense a fake troll among us.

I sense a fake troll among us.

Does he have a pimp coat on?

HA!

I once got fired from a job because I brought up the Little Red Hen.

I was executive director for a non-profit with an 18-member board, mostly comprised of Jr. Leaguers and their male counterparts. So I’ve been there about a year, and I’m 3 weeks out from the biggest fundraiser of the year, the thing that keeps our doors open, the thing the previous director had screwed up so badly that they spent $40 grand to clear $10 grand. And I’ve ridden herd on this thing to reverse those numbers and three weeks out, it’s consuming all my time. Anyway, the board members start gassing on about how we need to do some city board ass-kissing, and wouldn’t it be great to do a progressive dinner or something for them, and so forth. So I ask, when do you want to get started on that? And they say, right now. So I look up and down the table, and say, “who will help me bake the bread, said the Little Red Hen?”

5 weeks later, after they cleared $40 grand over the $10 grand we spent to put on the event, they canned my ass.

To my great relief. Another minute in that place and my ass would have been so tight that I was farting in high C along with them.

“He was rude, and no, he oughtn’t have done it – there. Let us understand clearly the distinction. Wilson may be rude, but Williams and West (especially) are pigs only 3/5 of a person, if you take the patriotic Originalist (wide-)stance.”

“Her performance was so vile that even historic tennis dead punk-rock bad boy John McEnroe GG Allin called it beyond the pale.”

“Had Wilson yelled that he was going to shove something down President Obama’s a Dora The Explorer toy up his own blankety-blank throat bunghole, then we’d have a similarity.”*
—————

*Klassick Vault-Copy Original-Draft Bozell (“It’s Got Electrolytes!“)

Here’s the dirty little secret. MTV likes what West did.

Another dirty little secret, it was the best damn thing to happen to that Taylor (why do I want to say Daines?) girl. Hell, I’d never heard of her before that.

And Serena’s outburst… would I go to hell if I suggested it was ‘roid rage? Just saying…

Plus, Wilson was in fucking Congress, that fucking rude fucking fucker- FUCK!

I feel bad that I could slip the F-word into that sentence as a verb… oh well, the other parts of speech were there.

I propose that we follow the example of that paragon of race relations, President Monroe. We shall repatriate all of our racists back to their homeland in Europe. We can seize a tract along the coast, say on the Baltic, where they can carve out a new country, call it Freedumbia with Bushovia as its capital.

More scolding, and an EXCELLENT comment section.

We shall repatriate all of our racists back to their homeland in Europe. We can seize a tract along the coast, say on the Baltic, where they can carve out a new country, call it Freedumbia with Bushovia as its capital.

I still think a huge arcology in which Dick Cheney could hunt them would be the answer, call it Teabag Tower. In order to leave, any inmate would have to write out “No amnesty for illegal aliens” on a piece of paper and run it through a scanner. Any spelling errors- no escape.

Jennifer, they rightly canned your ass because you dared to mock the Jane Gault of the red-feathered ass barnyard set. They may have been non-profiteers, but that doesn’t mean they weren’t Masters of the Non-Profit Universe.

Calming Influence – what they were was a bunch of tight-assed snobs who didn’t take kindly to snark from a 25-year-old.

It was totally worth it to go out the way I did.

Calming Influence – what they were was a bunch of tight-assed snobs who didn’t take kindly to snark from a 25-year-old.

The Shithouse Troll could have loosened them up.

‘SCUZE MAH FINGAHS!

Nipplenipplenipple!

Ideas…newsletter…

The Shithouse Troll is completely lost on those whom would most benefit from his ministrations. Or by just learning about him and his story.

Tight-ass sobs / shithouse troll. It seems the planets are coming into alignment.

Understand this: the wind is rising.

Ooh! Ooh! Here’s my second chance this weekend to post a link to this classic sketch.

Will it be a mighty wind, oh All-Prognosticating One?

Here’s the dirty little secret. MTV likes what West did. He’s their very own Dennis Rodman. It’s time the networks were held responsible for the outrages of their stars.

Here’s the dirty little secret: MTV probably loves what West did. Why? Because it got publicity, you stupid knobhead. Honestly, there’s only been a media industry for a couple of hundred years, you’d think he’d have caught up by now.

And this: starting a war based on lies, killing hundreds of thousands of innocent people, torture, kidnapping, warrantless wiretapping, all that jazz – fine by me, matey. Jumping on stage and making a dick of yourself? Outrage! Should be flogged!

Shit-house tight-ass snob Masters of the Universe gonna go Gault, you don’t watch your tongue!

No, wait…

Here’s the dirty little secret: MTV probably loves what West did. Why? Because it got publicity, you stupid knobhead. Honestly, there’s only been a media industry for a couple of hundred years, you’d think he’d have caught up by now.

Wait, this is shocking news. MTV still exists?

Tight-ass sobs / shithouse troll. It seems the planets are coming into alignment.

Jokes about Uranus are all part of the Leftwing conspiracy to destroy all social values USING MARKET FORCES.

What about jokes about Pluto, the godoid of the underworld?

“Honestly, there’s only been a media industry for a couple of hundred years,…”

“Ever since this country was founded, a thousand years ago…”

Substance McGravitas said,

More scolding, and an EXCELLENT comment section.

What a lot of whining. SNL was so mean to poor SARAH! *sniff*

The real question here is: why is the Little Red Hen unable to account for her whereabouts on EITHER November 22, 1963 or September 11, 2001? What is she really hiding?

Her connections to the SLA & the Weather Underground are already part of the public record.

The Little Red Hen – NEVAR FORGET!

What about jokes about Pluto, the godoid of the underworld?

Not a planet! HA! Suck it, Pluto.

http://www.universetoday.com/2008/04/10/why-pluto-is-no-longer-a-planet/

But we can make Pluto jokeoids, right?

We can seize a tract along the coast, say on the Baltic, where they can carve out a new country, call it Freedumbia with Bushovia as its capital.

They could call themselves the Teutonic Knights!
No, wait.

When you examine the words and imagery used in the Parable of the Little Red Hen, it’s evident that someone else wrote it for her.

But we can make Pluto jokeoids, right?

Dwarf jokes?

What is she really hiding?

Mao’s Little Red Hen?

Little Hen Lost?

Little Red Light District Hen? -courtesy of Ernie Anastos

Okay, which is it?

Pop music stars and athletes have the same moral responsibility as an elected government official, particularly during a globally publicized speech by his superiors?

Or do athletes and MTV stars hold the line for public discourse/engagement which all public officials should follow?

I’m confused here.

Or has Bozell concocted in his mind that MTV stars and athletes are in fact decision makers in government?

Some help appreciated, thanks.

I am a member of Little Ren Hen’s Army.

We are marching to cake making victory. Down with the barnyard elitist bourgeois!

his superiors?

Joe Wilson has about 6,500,000,000 superiors.

The real question here is: why is the Little Red Hen unable to account for her whereabouts on EITHER November 22, 1963 or September 11, 2001? What is she really hiding?

HITLER, THAT’S WHO!!

More scolding, and an EXCELLENT comment section.

The comments are great–they really are supremely asshurt over there.

N_B is that counting just humans? You forgot all flying, crawling and four legged creatures no?

We can seize a tract along the coast, say on the Baltic, where they can carve out a new country, call it Freedumbia with Bushovia as its capital.

They’ll need a founding myth and Sarah Palin should to play a large role in it.

We want our country back!

Ah, I remember telling the story to the Doktorling when she was younger.

Who will help me buy the sudafeds? asked the little red hen.
Who will help me bake the meth? asked the little red hen.

Who will help me bake the meth? asked the little red hen.

“Beep! Beep!” said the roadrunner from his rusted-out doublewide.

should to play

This phrase was translated from another language.

I’m setting up a sudafed lab.

I’ll bring WalMart to it’s knees!

“why do you want this sudafed?”

“Um, ’cause I got allergies? [Aaah-choo!]

“Oh sure, I get it, allergies!” [wink wink]

“No really, it helps my sinuses, and it’s cheap!”

“Sure, druggie. Real Americans choose Claritin™($4.79/capsule, suggested retail). You disgust me.”

Ah, I remember telling the story to the Doktorling when she was younger.

I remember reading the original Robert E. Howard version, before De Camp and Carter made their widely denounced editorial changes:

“Who will help me gut this Stygian dog?” asked the Little Red Hen.

I can always remember the Alex P. Keaton version where Ducky and Horsey served a notice of Foreclosure on the LRH who had too busy making bread to keep up payments,

Joe Wilson has about 6,500,000,000 superiors.

A commenter at Slacktivist has noted that Rep. Addison Graves Hansen Huntington Wegener Ricketts Parkinson “Joe” Wilson is named after three diseases.

“It’s gold, Jerry! Gold!”

And on the third day the little red hen said, Who will help me gather together the waters under the heaven unto one place, and help the dry land appear?

Not us, said the rebel angels.

I only have the imperfect, fragmentary English version of The Little Red Hen”, translated by John Dee. I am currently seeking the Latin translation by Olaus Wormius.

That is not done, which can eternal bake.
And in strange aeons, you can get your own damn cake.

Is there not an Arabic commentary by Abdul Al-Hazmat, who met an unusual end, being pecked to death by invisible assailants at midday in the market place?

I thought Abdul Al-Hazmat died after being exposed to an unacceptable level of dioxin contaminants.

Who will help me clean up the streets and deal to those thugs who killed the Goose Who Laid the Golden Eggs?, said the little red hen.
Not I, said the police sergeant.
Not I, said the chairdog of the building coop.
Then I’ll do it myself, said the little red hen, strapping an unregistered Tokarev automatic in a holster under her wing and filling her pockets with shotgun cartridges.

Who will help me to land a no-bid contract for my corrupt, incompetent petroleum extraction support services provider?
Not I, said the Department of the Interior bean-counter.
Not I, said the multi-term Northeastern Establishment Democratic Senator.
Not I, said the local community organizer.
Then I’ll do it myself, said the nasty Wyoming ogre, badgering the blue-blood, red-neck scion of an aristocratic family to name him as a running mate, and arranging for the election to be stolen.

Wow, this parable done got some legs.

mmm, chicken!

The last lines of Bozo’s spewl Here’s the dirty little secret. MTV likes what West did. He’s their very own Dennis Rodman. It’s time the networks were held responsible for the outrages of their stars.

One was unaware that TV stars bad actions had become such a big issue that TV stations would start to apologise for them and pay victim restitution etc. Well there goes FOX after they pay out on O’Reilly, Hannity and Beck.

Dude, where’s my recession? Dude, where’s my recession? Dude, where’s my recession? Dude, where’s my recession? Dude, where’s my recession? Dude, where’s my recession? Dude, where’s my recession? Dude, where’s my recession? Dude, where’s my recession? Dude, where’s my recession? Dude, where’s my recession? Dude, where’s my recession? Dude, where’s my recession? Dude, where’s my recession? Dude, where’s my recession? Dude, where’s my recession? Dude, where’s my recession? Dude, where’s my recession? Dude, where’s my recession? Dude, where’s my recession? Dude, where’s my recession? Dude, where’s my recession? Dude, where’s my recession? Dude, where’s my recession? Dude, where’s my recession? Dude, where’s my recession? Dude, where’s my recession? Dude, where’s my recession? Dude, where’s my recession? Dude, where’s my recession? Dude, where’s my recession? Dude, where’s my recession? Dude, where’s my recession? Dude, where’s my recession? Dude, where’s my recession? Dude, where’s my recession? Dude, where’s my recession? Dude, where’s my recession? Dude, where’s my recession?

They’ll need a founding myth and Sarah Palin should to play a large role in it.

Mother-fucker of her country?

Mother-fucker of her country?

In the dreams of her constituents.

In reality, a reluctant Jocasta.

In my mind, Nichol Williamson is reading this comment aloud.

So apparently for conservatives everything is equal to everything else, which makes liberals the relativists how?

Fantastic illustration. Do the authors do their own, or is their a Sadly, No! Illustration Tsar?

In this case, I did the Bozell illustration. Gavin also does a bunch of the photoshops for his posts. From time to time, we all use photoshops done by other S,N! bloggers. You know, we do that because sharing is a communist thing.

It’s time the networks were held responsible for the outrages of their stars.

Every time Obama is called a commie or fascist or compared to Stalin or Hitler on Fox, Rupert Murdoch should get a red-hot poker up the pooper.

Every time Rupert Murdoch gets a red hot poker up the pooper, an angel gets a pony.

Who’ll help me give Rupert Murdoch a surprise?

I read the Palin article. I never knew she had a PhD! (via one of the commentors)

Who needs fact when you can just make shit up.