Remind me–which Ben is this one? The Professional Virgin? The Plagiarist? The home-schuled booger eater? Help me out here…

Maybe all the libs on here should save the tears for Mary Jo and her family, and the millions of innocent unborn babies murdered every year thanks to Teddy Kennedy, or the way our nation was ruined when he passed the 1965 Immigration Act, or how he supported Communist dictatorships in the ’70s and ’80s. That’s the man you’re lionizing tonight. A murderer, drunkard, obese slob, baby killer, and comsymp.

Of course libs will now politicize his death, just as they did with Paul Wellstone, in a sad and pathetic attempt to rescue the dead health care bill.

I think the teabaggers should descend on the funeral en masse. Go for the Westboro Baptist school of PR management.

Wow. For someone who in life worked on Bobby Kennedy’s campaign, Mary Jo sure has changed her politics. I guess she’s another of those “I used to be a Democrat, but ever since 9/11 I’ve been outraged by Chappaquiddick” types.

Quick, let’s start predicting our favourite fReichtard gripe about Sen. Kennedy’s funeral!

Uh. Hmmm … Oh, I’ll take an easy one:

“It is disgusting that so many members of our so-called Congress (whom we the people actually employ and totally pay their salaries) are taking time off to attend his funeral when they should be about the business of we the people. Also.”

For someone who in life worked on Bobby Kennedy’s campaign, Mary Jo sure has changed her politics.

It’s like all the inanimate objects and dead people who are taking over the previous thread. In short, IT’S A MIRACLE!

I guess it was when Teddy Kennedy was so drunk he couldn’t even drive straight and drove us straight of a bridge, after which he left me to drown and then later lied about it that made me change my mind.

We’ll be seeing you rot in hell, Teddy!

Ghost of Mary Jo said,

August 27, 2009 at 4:12

Mary Jo Pehl, star of Mystery Science Theater 3000, is dead? Noooo!!!!!

I guess it was when Teddy Kennedy was so drunk he couldn’t even drive straight and drove us straight of a bridge, after which he left me to drown and then later lied about it that made me change my mind.

That reminds me of this guy George that I used to date…

Millions and Millions of Murdered Unborn Children

Wasn’t there a punk band who went by that name back in the 80s?

Of course libs will now politicize his death

I can’t believe I just wrote that. It makes me look hypocritical. Mostly, it just makes me look full-on stupid…

I posted it anyway.

(Sigh)

I need help.

There better not be a fucking peep when the next big rightwinger kicks it, because that would be unclassy and mean, and it’s totally different somehow.

Ghost of Mary Jo said,

Oh noes! A g-g-g-GHOOOST!

Wait a second, it’s not a ghost at all…

(rips off latex mask)

It’s Old Man Hannity, who owns the haunted FoxNews amusement park!

This certainly is good news for John McCain.

Geez, Senator Ensign, Senator Vitter, and Governor Sanford all lived in the same rooming house my ex-wife did….hey…hey, Hey!!!

This certainly is good news for John McCain.

That’s no fuckin’ joke. He’s already yapping about how ol’ Teddy would have preferred to “slow down”, and not push that nasty public option.

Y’know, here’s the thing I don’t understand about the right-wing’s abortion fetish.

These are the same people that presume that the only people to have abortions are filthy disgusting welfare mothers and liberal elitist whores. They indeed will go on at length about how we on the coastal enclaves should be “eliminated”, that we’re the termites that bring down America by eating away at its strong Midwestern moral fiber. They also resent having to support through their “well-earned” money the stupid, lazy, feckless poverty-stricken who are morally cupable for their misfortunes.

So, in other words, the only people who’re being aborted in their worldview, are the products of the culture the right-wing wants to destroy anyway. We are the weak effeminate barrier in the way of your strong Heartland Aryan Nation.

So what’s the fucking problem, bitches? Help us to help you. You want to see us destroyed, we want to have control over our lives and deaths, the two *should* mesh well under your worldview.

—

Also, I thought Mary Jo was that voice actress that played Kyle’s Mom in South Park that killed herself in ’01, I think?

You mean that was just a cover-up to disguise Kennedy’s involvement in her death? My God! And what did Chappaquiddick have to do with it?

Rumsfeld said that if soldiers used the better body armor, even if the soldiers paid for it themselves, rather than the government issue body armor, then if the soldiers got injured in Iraq, the government wouldn’t pay part of their health bills. Who’s a bigger douche, Rumsfeld or Kennedy?

Didn’t Orren (Orrin? Oren? who gives a fuck) Hatch or some other jerkoff say he needed Kennedy to negotiate with before a health care bill could be passed? I guess now they’ve got a permanent excuse. But they wouldn’t politicize his death or anything.

Remember that, libs, before you try to ram a Socialist health care bill down our throats. It will backfire, badly.

The health care bill is dead dead dead dead dead, as dead as your beloved murderer.

Thanks Ted!

Thanks, Ted!

I think the best thing that Troofie could do to show his obvious dissatisfaction with the equality, education and health care that Senator Kennedy stood for would be for him to burst into the funeral mass dressed as Mary Jo Kopechne, holding a book marked “Death Book”, and screaming into a megaphone about how “Socialist Obamacare” means we are headed into Nazi Germany part II.

I don’t think he’d be gang tackled at all, nor do I think he’d be kicked repeatedly in the yamsack while the megaphone was inserted in a very uncomfortable place. Not at all.

Go for it, Troofie! Troll real life. You’ll be remembered forever and ever.

Thanks, Ted!

Yep, Thanks Ted!

The thought of killing gives me a raging semi. That’s why I drool over the thought of the thousands of brown people my mancrush Dubya liberated to death.

Thanks, Ted!

Remember that, libs, before you try to ram a Socialist health care bill down our throats

You really like thinking about things being rammed down your throat, don’t you?

Fuck you, Ted!

This is the “Great Big Troofie Revenge” for cracking jokes at the expense of Robert Novak? Really?

Weak. Try harder, you pussy.

Notice that Ted’s greatest crime is NOT feeding Republican Paranoia about evil?

Thanks, Ted!

Gracias, Ted! VIVA LA RECONQUISTA!

Since Troofie doesn’t have a fucking job, he’s not one of us.

I said the 1965 Immigration Act I authored would not radically change the face of America. Boy, was I wrong! Either that, or I fucking lied, and wanted to import a class of moochers to vote for Democrat Socialist government.

Now, WE’RE a group Troofie belongs to. Mexicans terrify us because they work and we’re too cool to.

On the other hand, now that he’s gotten stuck in this groove, he’s cut down on the idiocy considerably.

I mean, now there’s just the nakedly anti-poor anti-minority rhetoric to go with.

How I would long for the day where the troll is reduced to just two words, repeated ad infinitum, like the fucking parrot it is.

Thanks, everybody! You don’t have to go home but you can’t stay here.

The vast majority of us are poor because of poor decisions we make in life, like spending our pay checks on malt liquor and rimz instead of putting it in a savings account.

Freely cut and pasted from The Rude Pundit:

Let’s just get this right:

Do you like your state and not the federal government controlling the curriculum of your kids’ schools? Thank Ted Kennedy.

Do you like being able to vote starting at age 18? Thank Ted Kennedy.

Do you think low-income people should get help with heating their homes in the winter? Thank the man.

Do you think the federal government should fund cancer research? Yep.

Do you believe that Meals on Wheels is a good thing? Ditto.

Does your daughter (or you, if you’re female) like playing soccer or basketball or softball at school? That’d be because of Ted Kennedy.

Do you think that disabled people should be able to go to school? Have access to buildings? Not be discriminated against for housing and loads of other things? Kennedy, big time.

You like your cheap airfares? You know the answer.

You think people on welfare oughta get jobs? So did Kennedy.

You think mental institutions should treat people humanely? Yeah, so did your new friend, Ted Kennedy.

You believe that the Defense Department should provide child care for the kids of soldiers? Kennedy did.

You think a woman shouldn’t lose her job if she gets pregnant? You think 100,000 more cops on the street’s a good idea? You think poor kids should have health care? You think soldiers in Iraq should have the proper armor? Just tick those things off the list. Some of them would have been accomplished without him; many would not have been.

You agreed with Ted Kennedy far, far more than you want to think you did, dear conservatives. Still, go ahead and dance your mad jigs on his still-warm corpse. Why not? We on the left certainly did when Jerry Falwell, Strom Thurmond, and Jesse Helms kicked. Hell, one asshole blogger even celebrated the death of Ann Coulter’s father. But know that you dance in ignorance. Ask Orrin Hatch.

But, of course, you want to address the far more pressing issue of whether or not Ted Kennedy killed Mary Jo Kopechne back at Chappaquiddick all those decades ago, no matter what the investigations said. There’s only a couple of things to say about that: The glib response is, “Yeah, and Thomas Jefferson nailed his slaves. What’s your point?” More directly, Kennedy asked the people of Massachusetts if they wanted him to quit. They did not. The rest of the nation may have not wanted him as president, but for Massachusetts, Chappaquiddick quickly became a settled issue and distant history. That’s all that mattered to keep him in the Senate, just like Louisiana will have to judge whether or not a prostitute-lovin’ David Vitter should go back. That’s democracy, gang, like it or not.

And Ted Kennedy did more for real, actual democracy than almost anyone else in our entire history as a nation.

You know, if being ‘white’ was so great you’d think everybody would be doing it.

BUT NO!

Everybody is going around getting browner and browner…

I hate niggers and that’s all that matters.

St. T, I think we got close when he was reduced to LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLs. He’s obviously been waiting for this moment for 15 months now. And what does he have to show for it? A spooky puppet show and some of the weakest “insults” since “Your mom goes to college.” He’s lost his edge and doesn’t even know it. There’s nothing more pathetic than a troll who can’t get it up anymore.

Nuh-uh! I got it up when we were talking about Reagan, and his strong, throbbing defense of this country, and his glistening ignorance of Iran-Contra, and his sweaty
LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL

Red Sox honor Sen. Kennedy at Fenway.

The Poltico is just fucking terrible. Someone actually looked at the circa 2006 media and said, “I think we can still go lower, pander further, and do more to elevate the horse race over policy.”

You know, Twoofie, you are a sad sick sorry motherfucker to even attempt to befoul Teddy Kennedy’s memory.

When you are a bloated obese cancer-ridden sack of shit, you will thank him for making it possible for your family to strain their backs, pushing your wheelchair up curb-cuts from where the publicly funded transport vans drop you off, taking you to the Community Health Clinics or Urgent Care Clinics you will so desparately need.

Your family members will thank him, because they still have their jobs, despite the amount of time they need to take off from work to care for your sorry ass.

And you will be grateful that the Immigration Act made it possible for there to be enough nurses and doctors from non-Nordic European countries to treat your foul dripping rotting flesh, and you’ll be grateful for the Medicare Prescription Drug act for providing the medications you desparately need.

You foul piece of shit, you’ll owe Teddy Kennedy for the modest vestiges of comfort remaining to you, hard-won for you despite your hatred.

Choke on it, motherfucker.

Anything rammed down Trollypant’s throat AND BACKFIRING.

Obama’s health care gambit has failed. Choke on THAT.

Choke on the fact that his approval rating is down at 50% even according to the liberal Gallup poll. Even libs like Chris Matthews say the Republicans have an “outside chance” of taking over the House next year. Once we get the House, we’re going to investigate Hopey McChange in his Corrupt Chicago Crew, and we’ll bring his Presidency down.

The really hilarious thing about wingnuts invoking Chappaquiddick is that it boils down to them trying to convince us they care what happened to someone who wasn’t making them money or killing people they don’t like. And after that it’s hard to stop laughing long enough to hear the rest.

Troofie, you’re running for Congress? You might wanna take care of all those sex offenses on your record first.

Blablabla healthcarehasfailedchokeonthatlibs blartyblartyblart

Same song, 125th verse.

Here is how it will go down next week. First, the results from Virginia and North Carolina will come in, and they’ll be declared for McCain. You’ll be disappointed, but “no big deal, change can’t come overnight” will be your comment. Florida will go red, and a little nervousness will creep in. The usual suspects will fall into the usual categories. As the night drags on, Ohio, Colorado, and (much to your horror) Pennsylvania will be too close to call.

My advice at this point to you will be to go to bed. You will wake up to a McCain presidency and the Great Liberal Freakout will be on.

Bookmark this, liberals, as this is exactly how it is going to go down. You will be wonder how the hell I was able to call this.

Obama’s health care gambit has failed. Choke on THAT.

Is that so? Did all the news about Teddy eclipse the vote where the bill was defeated? Hmm……guess not.

They should sing the Internationale at Teddy’s funeral and celebrate all the American working people I fucked over so my rich buddies could buy their third yacht.

Once we get the House, we’re going to investigate Hopey McChange in his Corrupt Chicago Crew, and we’ll bring his Presidency down.

So, going off precedent, you’re going to get him a second term, and he’ll leave office with the highest approval rating in a quarter-century? And then Michelle will win a Senate seat in another election cycle, eventually going on to run in a Presidential primary where she’ll be unexpectedly upset by an Mexican transsexual who’ll then go on to become President, further driving you motherfuckers off the goddamn edge?

Bring it on, bitch.

Obama doesn’t have my intelligence or political skill, or enough pragmatism to move to the center like I did.

Choking on it, sucking on it, everyone but him being a faggot.

So, going off precedent, you’re going to get him a second term, and he’ll leave office with the highest approval rating in a quarter-century? And then Michelle will win a Senate seat in another election cycle, eventually going on to run in a Presidential primary where she’ll be unexpectedly upset by an Mexican transsexual who’ll then go on to become President, further driving you motherfuckers off the goddamn edge?

Bring it on, bitch.

We have a winnah!

Thanks Tricky Dicky, Ronny RayuGunz, and G(H)W!!

So Clinton moved to the center midway through his second term while being investigated for lying about a blowjob, and that’s why he wasn’t removed from office.
Makes sense to me. Of course, for the purposes of this exercise I pretended I too was a jobless white supremacist meth-head.

The following is not exactly how I feel about Teddy nor is it accurate as to who he was, but it does describe something of the politics of the moment:

Friends, Romans, countrymen, lend me your ears;
I come to bury Caesar, not to praise him.
The evil that men do lives after them;
The good is oft interred with their bones;
So let it be with Caesar. The noble Brutus
Hath told you Caesar was ambitious:
If it were so, it was a grievous fault,
And grievously hath Caesar answer’d it.
Here, under leave of Brutus and the rest–
For Brutus is an honourable man;
So are they all, all honourable men–
Come I to speak in Caesar’s funeral.
He was my friend, faithful and just to me:
But Brutus says he was ambitious;
And Brutus is an honourable man.
He hath brought many captives home to Rome
Whose ransoms did the general coffers fill:
Did this in Caesar seem ambitious?
When that the poor have cried, Caesar hath wept:
Ambition should be made of sterner stuff:
Yet Brutus says he was ambitious;
And Brutus is an honourable man.
You all did see that on the Lupercal
I thrice presented him a kingly crown,
Which he did thrice refuse: was this ambition?
Yet Brutus says he was ambitious;
And, sure, he is an honourable man.
I speak not to disprove what Brutus spoke,
But here I am to speak what I do know.
You all did love him once, not without cause:
What cause withholds you then, to mourn for him?
O judgment! thou art fled to brutish beasts,
And men have lost their reason. Bear with me;
My heart is in the coffin there with Caesar,
And I must pause till it come back to me.

Every time you see one of the hate-filled GOP nay-sayers on the tube, just remind yourself: they are all honorable men.

I guess it was when Teddy Kennedy was so drunk he couldn’t even drive straight and drove us straight of a bridge, after which he left me to drown and then later lied about it that made me change my mind

I guess it was when 17-year old Laura Welch Bush ran a stop sign while possibly drunk and ended up killing a classmate, after which she turned to dealing pot and then later hushed it up that made me change my mind. I’d be a Republican except that I’m outraged about what happened on a remote Texas road in 1963.

Going after Laura Bush?!!!! YOU MONSTERS!!!!!!!!!!!!1 LEAVE PALIN’S FAMILY ALONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Well, I suppose watching you guys fall all over Troofie’s crotch AGAIN is slightly less depressing than Freep.

I’m Troofie in a wig.

nice one N__B. I like you. I will eat your brains last.

I will eat your brains last.

HOLY SHIT! Zombie Chthulu!

#

Well, I suppose watching you guys fall all over Troofie’s crotch AGAIN is slightly less depressing than Freep.

what’s stopping you from hanging out at I Can Haz Cheezburger?

If Mary Jo lived, they’d be calling her a whore.

Well, I suppose watching you guys

Contribute or fuck off.

I lived for forty fuckin’ years after Chappaquidick, living it up and being richer than God and boozing and whoring the whole time (or some of it, anyway). I hope every rightwing asshole who’s obsessed with me remembers that. My life after Chappaquidick was ten times better than the best years of your life, you miserable little fucks. How’s that feel?

I fucked over every working man and woman in America, created the conditions which caused the current economic meltdown, presided over the third worst recession in the 20th century, and am the reason average working Americans have lost income since 1980.

I bet you still didn’t make as much as Troofie’s *snicker* small business.

I bet you still didn’t make as much as Troofie’s *snicker* small business.

Or had a wife as beautiful as his: Morgan Fairchild.

Whom he’s slept with.

With consent on at least one occasion. Jealous now, huh libs.

“the way our nation was ruined”

Oh, stop pouting. Here, have some pie.

Also from Politico:

Andrew Breitbart, a Washington Times columnist who oversees Breitbart.com and BigHollywood.com, tapped into the anti-Kennedy vein in the hours after the senator’s death was announced, posting a series of Twitter messages in which he called Kennedy a “villain,” a “duplicitous bastard” and a “prick.”

“I’m more than willing to go off decorum to ensure THIS MAN is not beatified,” Breitbart wrote. “Sorry, he destroyed lives. And he knew it.”

I cannot not fucking wait until Bush (either/any) dies. In every sense of the “cannot wait” phrase.

I cannot not fucking wait until Bush (either/any) dies.

My own celebrations will not be entirely private. Well, the part where I come will.

“The fact that Combos “cheese your hunger away” is central to my point.”

I’m still laughing at that, and it’s from a completely different post I saw yesterday.

Someone less lazy than I am should check how TIDOSYankee and the like responded to some of us on the left finding good news in Falwell’s death. I’m betting there’s some yummy hypocrisy to be found.

Random anecdote: the day Reagan died I saw the Violent Femmes in concert. And they played “Old Mother Reagan”. That was a great day.

Come on, people! Who wants to slap around some dumb old troll whern there’s a whole new site full of crazy to enjoy?

http://christwire.org/

It has Marie Jon, and she’s not the craziest one there!

flashback to Raygun’s weeklong hagiographic funeral parade… (dih duh doo dih duh doo dih duh doo!)

GREENFIELD: We’ve already seen some conservatives angrily — well, of at least firmly saying, no, no, you liberals, don’t claim part of his legacy. Don’t talk about his (UNINTELLIGIBLE) and optimism. This is also a man with firmly held conservative political beliefs.

And don’t tell us that it was a negotiated settlement with communism. Ronald Reagan said all his life that communism was an abhorration and he wanted to see it wither and die. And at least with respect to the Soviet Union he got that wish.

So you’re quite right, Paula. The battles are begun even as we pause for these ceremonial moments.

I guess it was when Teddy Kennedy was so drunk he couldn’t even drive straight and drove us straight of a bridge, after which he left me to drown and then later lied about it that made me change my mind.

I guess you really did turn Republican after you died, Ghost Of Mary Jo, since now it seems to be all about you.

Millions and Millions of Murdered Unborn Children

Wasn’t there a punk band who went by that name back in the 80s?

I remember the Fried Abortions.

an abhorration
I approve of this word and will cite this thread when I use it to win a Scrabble game.

I remember the Fried Abortions.
My ‘Scraping Fetus Off the Wheel’ albums — let me show you them.

I’m with Illumninati Repton on this.
I swear these must be the Blogs4Brownback guys and they suckered Marie Jon into there fiendish plot. (snicker)

[real headline]
No Health Care For YOU! ObamaCare Using Soup Nazi Tactics

http://christwire.org/category/moral-alerts/

The thing that gets me about the outrage over Chappaquidick is that the damn thing was a horrible accident. Yeah, Teddy exercised really bad judgment by driving drunk while maintaining a mistress, resulting in a fatality. I imagine all the wingnuts tell themselves that, under similar circumstances, their heroes wouldn’t have ditched the girl in the car in an effort to save themselves.

That being said, imagine the outrage the liberal mainstream media would have made if a female staffer of an up-and-coming young Republican representative died in his office under mysterious circumstances.

Today, Chappaquiddick As An Excuse For Douchebaggery was finally laid to rest.

My ‘Scraping Fetus Off the Wheel’ albums — let me show you them.

*Ahem*

Also, Laura Bush killed someone with a car as a teen, but we don’t hear about that very often.

My favorite Jim Thirlwell stage name was The Foetus Of Excellence.

I liked You’ve Got Foetus On Your Breath.

Would it be premature and tasteless to consider who should replace Ted Kennedy in the Senate?

Obviously, the candidate would have to be from Massachusetts, but I am thinking that it should be someone from outside the Boston metro area- someone from western Mass, say Hampden County.

The ideal candidate should be fairly young, to ensure a long tenure in the Senate. Solid liberal credentials go without saying- commitment to GLBT issues, a humane approach to matters of criminal justice, and a solid grounding in public health issues. Strong academic credentials would be a must- I am thinking a Doctorate would be ideal… maybe a Rhodes scholar.

Certainly, this individual would have to be articulate, witty, and, in today’s media climate, telegenic.

Where would the people of Massachusetts find such a candidate? Where?

Would it be premature and tasteless to consider who should replace Ted Kennedy in the Senate?

Hitler.

Also, POOP.

http://gawker.com/5346223/tucker-maxs-movie-poop?skyline=true&s=x

I’m not sure who Tucker Max is – I have a vague recollection of him being a no-talent douchebag who became famous for being famous, or something – but the folks at Gawker seem to really, really like him.

Doesn’t this guy live in Massachusetts?

“The fact that Combos “cheese your hunger away” is central to my point.”

I’m still laughing at that, and it’s from a completely different post I saw yesterday.

Now I’m laughing at it, and plan to continue laughing at it, and I haven’t even seen it in context. That’s good stuff!

This is the “Great Big Troofie Revenge” for cracking jokes at the expense of Robert Novak? Really?

Yeah, it does show the weakness of having your only tactic being scraping the bottom of the racist dumbshit barrel. Nobody’s all that shocked when you simply continue to do so – amirite, Troofie?

That being said, imagine the outrage the liberal mainstream media would have made if a female staffer of an up-and-coming young Republican representative died in his office under mysterious circumstances.

I keep waiting for someone like Max Blumenthal to do an ambush interview of Joe Scar – “So, Joe, did you have anything at all to do with the death of Lori Klausitis?” That would be the bestest thing ever!

I’m lovin’ the mad editorial skillz flaunted on drawingclose.org’s front page!
(“Marie Jon’ is a political/religious-based writer and founder of http://www.DrawingClose.org — a sister website to RenewAmerica.”)

What wilpaypal we see and hear when He comes? It’s in the Bible , I Thessalonians 4:16-17, NIV.

Such low-hanging fruit:

http://christwire.org/2009/08/obama-is-literally-hitler/

MDC, which stood for Millions of Dead Cops, or Millions of Dead Children, or Multi-Death Corporations.

I, too, remember Mental Mike, his teen-aged bride, & the Fried Abortions.

That christwire.org site has got to be a spoof. Wonder if they’re using Marie Jon without her permission, or if they punked her?

We all know blacks, or also known as “African Americans” are a danger to this country. They cause high unemployment rates, high crime rates, harmful rap music, un-fathered children and of course they are the cause of drug use in America. Now McDonald’s wants to change that and make black the new nuclear white family.

The Truth, or parody website? I mean, I know it’s hard to tell sometimes, but come on.

Low-hanging fruit, yoobetcha.
Egyptian Tomb Hieroglyphic Prophesies Obama’s Dark Reign

Barack Obama worships false gods at the Pyramid of Ramses, where he finds himself prophesied in a hieroglyph within the Tomb of Kor. Warning: Viewer discretion is advised. Hieroglyph is work of ancient Egyptian magician and should not be stared upon, or viewed by women/children.

Yeah, I guess it is a parody site. Boy is my face red. (Well, brownish.)

That’s what I get for assuming they couldn’t fool Marie’ Jon.

It has Marie Jon, and she’s not the craziest one there!

Leaving out apostrophes makes Baby Jesus cry.

Egyptian Tomb Hieroglyphic Prophesies Obama’s Dark Reign

Weren’t they clever?

They’re very big on women & children “leaving the room” before the reader “reviews” say, Russki Furries or “Lady” Gaga.

Please pray and then have women/children immediately leave the room before viewing.

That christwire.org site has got to be a spoof. Wonder if they’re using Marie Jon without her permission, or if they punked her?

Yeah, the blogroll is the “tell”. Hilarious site, thanks for bringing it to my attention.

Yay! It’s my very first FYWP! It ate my confession to having been duped by Christwire.

Title refers to probably the best Neil Young song evar, right? Or at least one of his unheralded gems.

The fuzzy guitar solo that seems to feature some sort of physical or equipment breakdown is phenomenal. I always picture a drugged-up guitarist fighting for control over his axe.

Dancing on the light from star to star…

Christwire is the most awesome thing since ever. Just the title of one article gave me the biggest laugh I’ve had in weeks; I Am Extremely Terrified Of Chinese People.
I genuinely wonder if the folks behind Scrutator have reformed and repurposed.

I genuinely wonder if the folks behind Scrutator have reformed and repurposed.

Another “tell” that it’s a Poe:

Much like their brethren in the USSR and the Democratic party, the Chinese are atheistic wonders.

So damn close, but not 100%.

Soup Nazi Tactics
The Soup Nazis’ reputation for invincibility was destroyed once and for all by the Battle of Borschk.

The Soup Nazis’ reputation for invincibility was destroyed once and for all by the Battle of Borschk.

They had already suffered an earlier defeat in the Matzoh Brawl.

So damn close, but not 100%.

And then there’s this…

Only 60 years ago, these Asian peoples joined up with Adoldf Hitler in order to destroy the most moral nation on Earth.

Epic fail. But no, not racist. Also too.

“Only 60 years ago, these Asian peoples joined up with Adoldf (?) Hitler in order to destroy the most moral nation on Earth.”

What, the USSR?

Confused, now.

It’s like all the inanimate objects and dead people who are taking over the previous thread. In short, IT’S A MIRACLE!

BEHOLD the wonders of Obamacare!

Andrew Breitbart … called Kennedy a “villain,” a “duplicitous bastard” and a “prick.”

Do tell.

Christ on a Cracker,

Rethugs complaining about making Kennedy’s funeral a political spectacle? Jeebus, Rethugs would have rode Reagan’s rotting corpse like a surf board in Monterey Bay if they thought that could score them a few political points!

Gee I wonder if all the wingnuts are going to be constantly talking about how Laura Bush ran that stop sign and killed me when she kicks the bucket

This is the greatest comments thread in the history of the world. The stupid, it burns. Had the GOP not convinced their mouth-breathing right flank that a moderate and cautious new president was in fact the second coming of Stalin, they’d be crying the biggest tears of all over Teddy. Without a made-up bogeyman to fetishize, the GOP is nothing.

Jeebus, Rethugs would have rode Reagan’s rotting corpse like a surf board in Monterey Bay

Their sockpuppet hands up his dead, gaping asshole wasn’t disgusting enough?

Their sockpuppet hands up his dead, gaping asshole wasn’t disgusting enough?

Yeah, no doubt. I remember gagging at one relatively calm bit where the TV was showing the coffin being wheeled into an airplane or some shit, and the announcer sobbing “this is history! History is being made right here!“

Blah. It always comes back to Chappaquidick. A tragedy for sure, but let’s do a quick poll:

Anyone ever had a drunken concussion?

Me either, but I’ve taken care of a few friends that have. It’s tiresome work, seeing as that, when you have a drunken concussion, YOU ARE COMPLETELY FUCKING INSANE. One dude I was taking care of vomited on a nurse and then asked to sleep with her, while his wife was standing right next to him. The other demanded and got beer from a dildo store, wept for half an hour about the fate of the world’s bees, and nearly fell out of a window in the hospital.

All I’m saying is that everyone who still has suspicions about Teddy’s conduct at Chappaquidick should test the principle by drinking about 3/4ths of a bottle of whiskey and be beaten right in the temple with it. Then, try to remember their own name. Drunken concussions suck.

http://www.wsws.org/articles/2009/aug2009/pers-a27.shtml

In death, Kennedy is being eulogized as the “Lion of the Senate” —a master legislator and advocate for the common man. While the personal tragedies of the Kennedys evoke in the public a certain sympathy for Ted Kennedy, the fact remains that his name is not associated with a single serious social reform. He spent his final decade sponsoring bipartisan measures of a right-wing character, such as George W. Bush’s “No Child Left Behind Act”—an attack on public education—and a punitive bill targeting undocumented immigrants that failed to win passage in Congress.

Brigadier,

So his authorship of the Family Medical Leave Act, or the Americans with Disabilities Act, or the Kennedy-Kassebaum Act which created COBRA insurance, none of that is “serious social legislation” despite the outcry from the economic royalists, huh?

Sweet Jesus. The Spartacus League didn’t like Teddy? Oh, damn. And he got jobbed by the right on No Child Left Behind — the same right who ran Congress AND the White House at the time? And something bad he supported didn’t pass?

You wouldn’t know “serious social reform” if it bit you in the commune, dickhead. He was there at the beginning of Head Start. He was instrumental in extending health care for 7 million children you fucking moron. He helped make this a more fair and equitable country in every way this country IS fair and equitable.

For the life of me, I can’t figure out why the 3rd parties on the Left are so ineffectual. I mean, it’s a real head-scratcher.

Someone mentioned that the Libs are politicizing Kennedy’s death.

What of the politicization of Ronald Reagan’s death and the push to rename one thing after another after good ol’ Ronnie?

Get off your high horses, hypocrites, and shut the f*ck up. Thanks!

Nut cases and loonies seem to be able to pass themselves off as “conservatives”, in response to sucking up to the dollars offered by the health insurance lobby. These nut jobs aren’t conservative, and now they are creating a backlash, against the nuttiness they are peddling. The solution from the loony fringe “movement” hardcore, is to follow idiots like this down the rabbit hole, with nut job logic like this?

In death, Kennedy is being eulogized as the “Lion of the Senate”

And he’s been refered to as the “Lion of the Senate” 8,220,000 times in the last year (teh Google). So while he is being eulogized that way he was also called that while he was alive; kind of invalidating your implication that he’s being remembered differently now that he’s dead.

Millions and Millions of Murdered Unborn Children

…can be used to make a delicious casserole, with just a few thousand gallons of Miracle Whip.

😉

If only the rapture were real and all the right wing scum would simply disappear off the face of the Earth, we would be so much better off.

Anyone ever had a drunken concussion?

Not personal experience but I did take a drunken classmate, concussed with one punch to the temple at a party, to the hospital. He spent the night and the better part of the next day drooling all over himself.

Wait a second, it’s not a ghost at all…

It’s Old Man Hannity, who owns the haunted FoxNews amusement park!

And I would’ve gotten away with it too, if it wasn’t for you meddling kids!