I just discovered Madonna! WHAT STAR POWER!

Now now Camille, no need to be bitter because Sarah Palin turned down your advances.

Camille Paglia. Such a sad embarassment to feminism. She doesn’t stand for anything but bitterness and anger. Doesn’t matter who is there, she lashes out at them.

Shorter Camille’s Life’s Work:

I’m a liberal Democrat who despises everything liberal Democrats stand for, espouse, and believe.

Don’t forget “I’m a lesbian who thinks women have no right to complain if men rape them.”

I’m not sure I disagree with her. Obama has let Congress take the lead on healthcare reform and he probably should have put his face more closely into the line of fire.

Awesome. And I’m only on the start of page two. The part where Camille says that Sarah Palin’s death panel accusation is so laughably ridiculous that…it’s ridiculous like a fox! Obamacare is actually the new incarnation of the Spanish Inquisition!

BwahhAHAHAHhaHAHA. Camille, sweetheart – you are the reason that us chauvinist pigs think women R dumbs.

Warning: reading Paglia is hazardous to your mental health.

Jesus, I turn my back on the place for like 24 hours, and I’ve got a buttload of reading to catch up on.

But on reflection, I realized that Palin’s shrewdly timed metaphor spoke directly to the electorate’s unease with the prospect of shadowy, unelected government figures controlling our lives.

Oh, so that’s what that was. A metaphor. Uh-huh. Yup. Ohkay.

I’m not sure I disagree with her.

Get to page two. On page one she’s only generic stupid (go rationing!), but by page two, she’s worked up into full on weapons-grade-NRO-Corner-level wingnut stupidity.

Here’s the best part, annotated:

You can keep your doctor; you can keep your insurance, if you’re happy with it, Obama keeps assuring us in soothing, lullaby tones. Oh, really? And what if my doctor is not the one appointed by the new government medical boards for ruling on my access to tests and specialists? (a) And what if my insurance company goes belly up because of undercutting by its government-bankrolled competitor? (b) Face it: Virtually all nationalized health systems, neither nourished nor updated by profit-driven private investment, eventually lead to rationing. (c)

Those would be, in order: A) the “death panels”, B) the notion that guvmint is so disastrously bad at running anything that everyone else will go bankrupt from the competition of them failing so bad, and C) the “rationing” scare, which is the fear that not everyone in the country will have exactly all the care they need or demand, like we have now with private insurance companies.

The difference of course is that her spewing right wing talking points is different because it’s a “feminist liberal” spewing it, which we know because Rush Limbaugh calls her that every time he points out how she thinks just like him.

Paglia, like Hitchens, is proof that one can be clever without being smart.

You can keep your doctor; you can keep your insurance, if you’re happy with it, Obama keeps assuring us in soothing, lullaby tones. Oh, really? And what if my doctor is not the one appointed by the new government medical boards for ruling on my access to tests and specialists?

She said that?

On Page Two?

You mean to tell me she cannot read back four words in her own sentence, and realize that she didn’t bother to construct an argument that disproves Obama’s statement, and then takes it on faith that he’s wrong?

What a doosh.

On Page Two?

No, that’s still page one. Page two is worse.

Why do they keep bringing back the worst parts of the 1990s?

Actor:

She said that on page one. Seventh paragraph.

But I can sympathize with you not even getting that far if you read it, I have to take airsick pills to even climb aboard a Paglia flight into stupidity and right wing radio talking points for a few minutes.

As has become her wont, Paglia works in another embarrassingly clueless paragraph on Brazilian popular culture. Shorter paragraph: “Brazilians are so exotic! Daniela Mercury is so yummy!”

And don’t miss the column’s final paragraph. Stay classy, professor.

I read the “Voice of Sanity” title in the browser, then clicked through….

…and saw Camille.

You lied to me, Gavin. You lied.

My page two diary:

I realized that Palin’s shrewdly timed metaphor…

When I first read that I burst out laughing at seeing “Palin’s” and “shrewdly” next to each other. Then I realized that it was a typo and it should have been shrewishly. Therefore Obama is going to euthanize the elderly.

… as well as his insulting condescension toward an officer doing his often dangerous duty, did serious and perhaps irreparable damage to the president’s standing.

Oh Camille, you’ve won me over. Of course the real victim in the whole hullabaloo was Jim Crowley. That poor police officer had to suffer all that abuse from a “disabled” man and didn’t even get to spend hours in a jail cell. In fact all he got out of it was a beer with the president, who didn’t even have the courtesy or hospitality to even invite him inside. That’s right, poor Sgt. Crowley had to drink his beer outside! In late July no less!

… the director’s inept description of the “complexion” of the pool having been changed — which may simply have been a whopper of a Freudian slip.

Wow. What better proof is there that the Private Swim Club thing was totally not about race at all. Because when you make a Freudian slip you are accidentally revealing something which never even crossed your mind.

You lied to me, Gavin. You lied.

To paraphrase Treebeard, “A zombie should know better!”

Two points always come up in wingnut appreciations of nationalized healthcare. (1) We will have RATIONING! Like in Stalinism! (2) Some bunch of faceless bureaucrats is going to decide when you can have healthcare and when you can’t.

I know I sound like a broken record, but why can’t somebody point out that (1) Americans already have rationing, it’s just done by ability to pay rather than medical need and (2) there are already a bunch of faceless bureaucrats who decide when you’ve had enough healthcare, only you call them “insurance companies” and you pay them very handsomely for the privilege of screwing you when you need their help.

Do you think if we pooled our money and hired some skywriters to write this in really big letters in the skies, it might help?

Camille Paglia. Such a sad embarassment to feminism.

Will someone explain to me how this disgusting twit ever got associated with anything even remotely like feminism?

Because she was a woman who wrote a book?

Here’s Paglia’s final paragraph: “Oh, one last note. Gay trivia: The 17-year-old hustler who in 1975 murdered the gay film director Pier Paolo Pasolini by repeatedly running him over with his own car on an Italian beach was named Giuseppe Pelosi. Hmm … Hustling must run in the family.”

I officially promise, if I’m ever in the same room as Camille Paglia, to hit her repeatedly with the Chrysler Building.

Help pass the Read the Bills Act. It would require Congress to have:

* Each bill, and every amendment, must be read in its entirety before a quorum in both the House and Senate.

* Every member of the House and Senate who plans to vote in the affirmative – to vote for tax increases, for spending bills, for the retention or creation of programs, in support of laws and regulations – must sign a sworn affidavit, under penalty of perjury, that he or she has attentively either personally read, or heard read, the complete bill to be voted on.

* Every old law coming up for renewal under the sunset provisions must also be read according to the same rules that apply to new bills.

* Every bill to be voted on must be published on the Internet at least 7 days before a vote, and Congress must give public notice of the date when a vote will be held on that bill.

* Passage of a bill that does not abide by these provisions will render the measure null and void, and establish grounds for the law to be challenged in court.

* Congress cannot waive these requirements.

http://www.downsizedc.org/etp/campaigns/27

#

To paraphrase Treebeard, “A zombie should know better!”

I know, I know. At least I’ve learned not to click through the Shorters.

Or to click Smut Clyde’s links.

Slow Congress Down–Make Them Read the Bills said,

August 12, 2009 at 16:56

Yea, not gonna happen.

Why shouldn’t it happen?

Page three, excepting Scott’s observation, is much less offensive. All it’s got are an indictment obsessive gym culture gone to seed followed by links to hot young super-models (possibly the only reddeming part of the entire article. That’s right, the best part of this feminist lesbian’s screed is the pr0n-linkage). Also, the performance of openly bisexual Angelina Jolie in Gia is Camille’s springboard to discuss straight women playing lesbians in movies.

But there are links to hot models.

One thing to point out in this health care debate (and listen CLOSELY, Chuck Norris):

THERE IS NO BILL, YET. There are several proposals from several committees. Nothing has been scheduled for a vote, because a Bill has NOT been written. It’s getting there.

This “1000 page Bill” bullshit is bullshit. No such thing exists.

But I guess reality has never been the Right’s friend.

Oh, and term limits, while we’re at it. Let’s do Term Limits Too!!

AIEEEEEEE! NOSFERATU!

Oh wait, it’s just Mizz Paglia. Nevahmind.

Help pass the Read the Bills Act.

So where the fuck were you people when the PATRIOT Act was passed? Eh?

Also. Today’s local paper has a headline something along the order of “Happy Crowds At Obama Town Meeting”. Nothing about the asshole who was packing, above the fold at least.

Why shouldn’t it happen?

Do you really need a primer in the Constitution?

Hey, how come people who plan to vote nay don’t have to read the bill?

Or is the only point to further enable the Party of No?

And where the fuck was this “read the bill” nonsense when the Patriot Act was being ramrodded?

FOAD.

Damn you to hell, PERE UBU.

Let’s do Term Limits Too!!

Odd you didn’t hear anything about that for the last twelve or so years.

Hmm, same period Republicans dominated the Congress.

naah, must be a coincidence.

That’s why we pass an amendment, Actor.

They need to READ THE BILLS THEY PASS. Why are you opposed to that?

Do you really need a primer in the Constitution?

Yes.

Short answers to etc….

Damn you to hell, PERE UBU.

To quote Marty Feldman, “Too late!”

And every Congressman that votes for the Public Option Trojan Horse should be forced to use it if it passes. Sign ’em up. If it’s so great, Teddy Kennedy and Robert Byrd should have no problem using it, right?

They need to READ THE BILLS THEY PASS. Why are you opposed to that?

Again – where the fuck were you people back in 2001? Why this sudden urge to “read the bill”? Could it possibly be all the lies you’re being told about a bill that doesn’t even exist in final form?

Naaaaaah. Must be another coinkydink.

They need to READ THE BILLS THEY PASS. Why are you opposed to that?

It’s simply unconstitutional. There is no provision in the Constitution that demands this, and there is no legal precedent for it.

And when Michael Moore ran around DC reading the Patriot Act out loud (from an ice cream truck) you guys mocked him.

So shut the hell up, Troofie.

Will someone explain to me how this disgusting twit ever got associated with anything even remotely like feminism?

I have no idea, but it was clear way back when she first appeared that she was no such thing, to people like the incomparable Molly Ivins who wrote about her in 1991, always worth a read if anyone hasn’t:

http://www.its.caltech.edu/~erich/misc/ivins_on_paglia

This was early on, when Paglia was writing about women getting raped because they asked for it by dressing certain ways and so on. Who would have thought her most offensive twittishness was still to come, she was just getting started turning into the Limbaugh apostle she is today.

Well, who knows, kid? But everyone else is happy on Baked Chicken Wednesday.

I’m not just talking about this bill. I’m talking about making Congress read EVERY bill before the pass it, outloud, before a quorum, in both houses.

the Public Option Trojan Horse

*ding ding ding*

You LOSE, sir! Good day!!!

Anybody remember the Line Item Veto?

Same deal: when Bush the Elder was in office (and Reagan, too) Republicists were all “Oh! We need a line item veto!”

Congress gave it…to Clinton!

The Republicans couldn’t line up fast enough to put in Constitutionality challenges in that this specific feature was not enumerated in the Bill of Rights or Articles.

QED

So is this an Act or an Amendment?

Again, there’s a difference. It’s written in the Constitution you are so willing to violate.

We don’t oppose the idea of reading the bills. we oppose the enactment of pointless, mandatory ‘zero tolerance’ stupidity masquerading as ‘original intent’; fol-de-rol whose sole intent is to make a waning party able to exercise even more disproportionate power than they do already.

Pass a Reading Comprehension Act for the populace first.

BWAHAHHahhahahAHHAHA.

O fuck. Man. Pass the Read the Bills Act. That is fucking awesome.
Congress cannot waive these requirements

This works in the same way that God can make a rock so heavy that even he can’t lift it.

Best part? Forcing every Congresscritter to read every bill and then notarize a statment confirming that happened – is the goal of “downsizedc.org”. BWAaahhahHAHAHhaHAHA. Yup, that’ll sure shrink the hell out of the federal government.

Troofie, why do you hate the Constitution of the United States of America so?

Why do you hate freedom so?

Why do you hate America so?

I’m talking about making Congress read EVERY bill before the pass it, outloud, before a quorum, in both houses.

Oh, that’ll do wonders for the democratic process, ayup, sure ’nuff. Then you teabaggers can whine about “how long everything takes” and how “Congress is dragging its feet” and that we really really need a dictatorship by a nice conservative man to make things more efficient.

Are you this stupid naturally or do you have to practice at it?

Why don’t you want Congress to read every bill? Is it because it might slow or shrink the size and scope of the federal government?

If we have learned nothing else from 1993, it’s that the Democrats should never try to do anything about health care ever again. Otherwise, the Right may get angry.

I want Congress to be slow as possible, and so do all movement conservatives. SLOW CONGRESS DOWN!

Another good idea–make every law come up for renewal every two years.

I am concerned.

Is it because it might slow or shrink the size and scope of the federal government?

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!

No, idjit, it will do precisely the opposite AND it’s against the fucking Consitution, you moran!

Why don’t you want Congress to read every bill?

Why do you touch yourself when you think of mommy?

They need to READ THE BILLS THEY PASS.

I’d love to see how they’d enforce this! Hilarious!

“No, idjit, it will do precisely the opposite AND it’s against the fucking Consitution, you moran!”

Where does it say that in the Constitution, idiot?

Slowing Congress down INCREASES the size and scope of the federal government? How, exactly? Hmmm?

Fortunately the Read the Bills Act will never pass because no one’s going to read it!!!
HHAHHHAAHAHahhahaHAHAHaHAHAAAHAHAH!!!

Okay, I’m sorry Camille Paglia. Your stupidity is staggeringly vast, but I apologize for accusing you of having reached the truly astounding heights of moran-itude displayed by Read the Bills Act.

Notice nobody says exactly WHY this is a bad idea, just “you will never get it passed”, “it’s unenforceable” etc. I wonder why that is?

Another good idea–make every law come up for renewal every two years.

But why stop at two years? It will shrink the government even faster if they have to revote every month.

The worst thing about many liberal Democrats is that they fail to want to do all the things that right wing Republicans want them to do. Sure, they do most of it, but not 100%, so this means that Democrats hate America, because the only real and TRUE Americans are right wing white conservative Southerners.

“But why stop at two years? It will shrink the government even faster if they have to revote every month.”

Sure, why not? The more we can bog down congress in pointless busywork, the less time they have to expand the size and scope of government or raise taxes.

Better yet, pass a Shut Up Camille Paglia Act first.

Why don’t you want Congress to read every bill?

Because we’ll never get our free gay abortions with Communist ice cream if they do.

Speculatively, I wonder which side of the aisle is more egregious about not reading legislation. Given the amount of bullshit being thrown out there about health care reform from the Right, I would guess that Republicans are the ones who blow it off for the most part.

So why do the Republicans Hate the Constitution?

Oh yeah, it’s all those Rights and stuff. And the fact it gives equality to the darkies and the wimmens.

Oh wait! I get it now!

Because the Republicans for six years with a Republican president basically sat on their asses doing nothing and letting the country and the economy melt away before our very eyes, now that a Congress is actually DOING something, suddenly it’s all happening too fast, even tho I’ve seen paint dry quicker than these numbnuts have worked!

So it’s not that Congress is doing anything but that low-normals like Troofie here CAN’T KEEP UP!

Why don’t we just ban all laws? Except for the one banning laws. And the second amendment. And laws against Democrats. And laws banning taxes. And also the laws that ban the passage of further laws banning laws that ban laws except for laws that ban laws.

Dear god, why won’t any of you take Troofie seriously?!

Notice nobody says exactly WHY this is a bad idea

It’s unConstitutional. Period. That makes it a bad idea.

After all, Troofie, our Founders were perfect men who knew precisely what would be best for the nation for 250 years or more!

Another good idea–make every law come up for renewal every two years.

Including tax breaks.

Toofy, how much actual acquaintance with the mechanism of government do you have?

Have you participated in any form of organized policy making? Served on a PTA committee? Led a Boy Scout Troop? A garden club?

Another good idea – fat free ice cream!

And all members of Congress should wear clown suits, no takebacks!

Wheee! This is fun!

The President should be required to talk in either a Elmer Fudd or Curly Howard voice at all times! Every law should be written in Esperanto! The Capitol Dome should be painted paisley! No shirt, no shoes, no bill!

Other innovative ways to shrink the federal government:

*Limit Congressional sessions to thirty days on even numbered year, and three months on odd number years.

*Make being a Congressman/Senator an unpaid position.

*Subject Congress to every bill it passes

*Require a 3/4 majority in both houses to raise taxes

*Ban increasing spending faster than the rate of population growth + inflation.

This is fun:

Molly Ivins on Paglia

The more we can bog down congress in pointless busywork, the less time they have to expand the size and scope of government or raise taxes.

…meaning the executive branch will step in and start issuing unfunded mandates and creating bureaucracies to oversee them, thus taking even more power away from the states and localities.

Tell me, Troofie, does ANYONE on your side of the country think any of these things thru at all?

Have you participated in any form of organized policy making? Served on a PTA committee? Led a Boy Scout Troop? A garden club?

Used both hands to jerk of– Oh. I forgot. No dick.

Another thing:

Balanced budget amendment, in addition to what I posted above.

Yeah, Gavin, I have to say – compared to the troll, Mizz Camille does indeed sound like a shining voice of sanity.

(Shining voice?)

#

So it’s not that Congress is doing anything but that low-normals like Troofie here CAN’T KEEP UP!!

Heh.

One more thing:

Anybody that doesn’t pay federal income taxes won’t be able to vote, period.

The desperation in your posts is comforting, Troofie. It means you’re terrified that you might be out of touch.

Don’t be, because you are!

Slowing Congress down INCREASES the size and scope of the federal government? How, exactly? Hmmm?

Look you fucking dipshit doorknob – your proposal is to get every congressperson and senator to read every single act they vote on – and then provide a notarized affadavit confirming such. It’s not so obvious to us non-mentally-deficient that this will require no additional staff.

Okay, going into full-on talking to idiots mode here.

What you’re proposing doesn’t even meet with what I assume is your goal. You want power to be vested back to the people or possible the People. But if your crazy ass notion was enacted all that would do is shift power into the hands of appointed bureaucrats. Everyone knows that the average congresscritter’s attention span is however long it takes for the hooker to finish them off. No bills would be passed – thus all government work will be done by regulations and executive fiat.

What happens when socialest Obama decides to raise the marginal tax rate to 99%? It fucking happens and Congress can’t do shit fuck all about it unless you can convince a quorum in both houses to Read the Bill stopping it.

And in conclusion, PENIS.

If laws could only endure for 90 days, it would allow for much more changeover. Likewise, members of government should only be allowed to serve 1 term of 15 days.

And anyone that receives largess from the Feds shouldn’t be able to vote, either, so they can’t vote themselves more largess from the public treasury.

So it’s not that Congress is doing anything but that low-normals like Troofie here CAN’T KEEP UP!!

Heh.

I think this meme is a direct outgrowth of him running down the street in his helmet yelling at the bus driver to wait.

So why, exactly, were none of these “slow congress down” items enacted in the prior eight years again?

I can’t seem to recall….

He can’t raise taxes by fiat–that’s unconstitutional. The Supreme Court would strike it down.

Troofie, do you realize how childish you and your fellow Galters sound?

Do you realize just how the average American is looking at the debacle that is the astroturf movement and thinking “I’m damn glad I didn’t vote Republican!”?

Shorter Troofie:
“Sqrew you guys, Ah’m gowing heom!”

He can’t raise taxes by fiat–that’s unconstitutional.

Guess again, Short Eyes.

I’d love to see how they’d enforce this! Hilarious!

Congressional Pop Quizzes!!!

You live in Manhattan, Actor. You have no idea how the “average American” thinks because to you an “average American” is some rich, Park Avenue liberal elite on the Upper East Side. Fuck you.

Thank GOD we didn’t keep the federal capital in New York City!

“Slow Congress Down”. Yeah, right.

When a Congresscritter tried to slow down giving Chimpy McFlightsuit his “war powers” – the only one who did, my Rep. Barbara Lee – you wingnuts wanted to have her shot for treason.

Who in Congress read the Patriot Act? Let’s play back the howls of protest from the right wing when that happened. Go to the tape, Jimmy…

*crickets*

*Limit Congressional sessions to thirty days on even numbered year, and three months on odd number years.

Wheee! Then we can whine about how they’re spending all their time going back and forth between home and DC!

*Require a 3/4 majority in both houses to raise taxes

Yeeeeeeppers, that’s what it always comes down to for you clowns, eh?

How about a bill requiring the next time an idiot Preznit decides to invade a country he actually obey the present Constitution and federal law and get the backing of Congress in an actual declaration of war, eh? Wouldn’t THAT be a radical idea.

“How about a bill requiring the next time an idiot Preznit decides to invade a country he actually obey the present Constitution and federal law and get the backing of Congress in an actual declaration of war, eh? Wouldn’t THAT be a radical idea.”

Ron Paul supports that idea.

And anyone that receives largess from the Feds shouldn’t be able to vote, either, so they can’t vote themselves more largess from the public treasury.

Yeah, right. Since everybody in America benefits from something the Federal Government does, you just eliminated every single voter.

I know you actually meant “Welfare” right? You didn’t mean things like water, or power or roads; or companies that have Federal contracts, or employees of those companies, or Banks or Insurance companies….

You should just say “the darkies can’t vote again. Look what they did! A nigger president!” like you really want to.

You know, Toofy, have you ever wondered how a governing body does things like – oh, I don’t know – get a government building painted?

Have you even imagined the process for something as simple as hiring a painting contractor, or a vendor to provide computers, or a contractor to pave the streets?

I’m sure you haven’t. Even now, it takes well over several months for even a modest municipal government operating ethically with sunshine laws to award a simple contract. Are you really saying that it would be a good thing to slow down government to the point where even such routine business takes twice or even three times as long?

Also, only white people can vote.

And Sarah Palin is president. Also, Sarah Palin is also my wife. And she does anal.

Also, heck with it, I’m president. No, wait, I’m god. Wait, wait, I AM THE GOD OF HELLFIRE!

That’ll slow down Congress.

You live in Manhattan, Actor. You have no idea how the “average American” thinks because to you an “average American” is some rich, Park Avenue liberal elite on the Upper East Side. Fuck you.

You forgot “drop dead gorgeous”.

Hey somebody nymjacked me. When will you delete THEIR comments? Hmmm?

Another thread off into Troothiland. Great.

Have you ever been to, say, Kansas Actor? Or Nebraska? Or Kentucky? Probably not.

Troofie, I believe there are several brands of decaf on the market today that I’m told taste almost as good as regular coffee.

Have you ever been to, say, Kansas Actor? Or Nebraska? Or Kentucky? Probably not.

Yes, no, and twice.

Have you?

Congress shall only pass laws giving me and my friends money. Also, all liberals and non-whites go to jail. Congress shall also pass laws praising the enormity of my giant-size man-thing.

STOP OPPRESSING ME.

Anybody that doesn’t pay federal income taxes won’t be able to vote, period.

Better yet – any company that doesn’t pay taxes in the United States isn’t allowed to get any federal aid, is not allowed to lobby Congress, and none of their employees can vote.

*gah* Politics of a fifteen-year-old. I swear, that’s what Libertarians are all about.

Thanks also for confirming my suspicions that the whole “Read the Bill” bullshit was yet another bit of teabaggery. Also.

Standing in the airport doesn’t count, city boy.

Get outside that Manhattan bubble and out into the Real World of America, Jew boy.

Ron Paul supports that idea.

“Doctor” Ron Paul’s a fucking whackjob who hangs out with idiots like Alex Jones.

Congress shall only pass laws banning nymjackers. That’ll teach you, nymjacker.

Seriously. Giant-size.

Ron Paul supports that idea.

I must have missed when he introduced that bill.

He can’t raise taxes by fiat–that’s unconstitutional. The Supreme Court would strike it down.

Really? How would that work? Who’s going to enforce anything? You’re effectively shutting down Congress, the Supremes can say whatever the fuck they want, but ain’t nothing gonna happen unless there’s some way of making the executive branch obey.

Well, this here comedy is the silver lining in the dark clouds that were the GOP majority. Thanks to the Republican party for making “Congressional Oversight” an oxymoron or we’d never get to bust a gut at these morans.

PROTIP: “Checks and Balances” does not refer to playing chess with weights.

He introduced a Declaration of War resolution against Afghanistan.

Get outside that Manhattan bubble and out into the Real World of America, Jew boy.

Says the man taking his marching order from AIPAC.

Toofy, how much actual acquaintance with the mechanism of government do you have?

As for me, my entire understanding of the legislative process is what they sang in Schoolhouse Rock’s “I’m Just a Bill.” Which puts me ahead of 100% of wingnuts who all believe that governance is a weird metaphorical manly oil-wrestling of wills, or two Clint-Eastwoodesque gunfighters endlessly squinting at each other waiting for the other to blink, or something like that.

We need government Schoolhouse Rock for adults. Catchy tunes explaining what progressive taxation really is, and how appointing Latinas to the Supreme Court doesn’t make nuclear weapons magically appear in the hands of terrorists, stuff like that.

I didn’t say that thing about Jews, it was a fucking nymjacker.

The real anti-semites are on the Left.

I notice Troofie never answered my question about Nebraska, Kansas and Kentucky.

Yeah, right. Since everybody in America benefits from something the Federal Government does, you just eliminated every single voter.

The GOP’s only political strategy involves identifying new enemies, so they could really cut out the middleman and just decide that everyone is the enemy.

Get outside that Manhattan bubble and out into the Real World of America my mom’s basement, Jew boy.

Fixilated.

*Subject Congress to every bill it passes

Congress consists of Americans. I know, shocking. Therefore, every bill they propose, ratify, pass, all applies to them.

Also, making Congress an unpaid position? Why, I’m *sure* no lobbyist would want that idea to pass, making the legislative branch ever more dependent on selling out their souls to gigantic corporate sponsors so they don’t die on a street.

I’ve been to all those places, and whats more, I LIVED in Kentucky. I’ve lived in the heartland. Still do. Asswipe.

I didn’t say that thing about Jews, it was a fucking nymjacker.

Prove it! After all, the Semitic people include AYRABS and you are on record as hating AYRABS because they’re brown people.

So are Jews, then. So you hate Jews. QED

Toofie is a Jew hater! Toofie is a Jew hater! Toofie is a Jew hater! La la la la la la!

Have you ever been to, say, Kansas Actor? Or Nebraska? Or Kentucky?

Nebraska 2nd District voted for the negro.

The nym-jocker is complaining about nym-jocking?

WE’RE THROUGH THE LOOKING GLASS HERE, PEOPLE!!

Actor, come to my part of the Heartland. It’ll be fun.

WTF! WP not only blows goats, it blows GOATSE.

I’ve been to all those places, and whats more, I LIVED in Kentucky.

I’m guessing the pederasty charges stuck.

Leftists hate Israel and want it to be destroyed by the Palestinian hordes in the name of “social justice”.

The nym-jocker is complaining about nym-jocking?

He only did it because we forced him to through unfair piefiltering, remember.

Actor, come to my part of the Heartland.

Wouldn’t you want to come to the Brainland?

Fuck New York. Once again, thank GOD we didn’t make that our capital city.

Yea, we just have all your money.

Or rather, I do…muahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhaha!!!!!

“Oh, one last note. Gay trivia: The 17-year-old hustler who in 1975 murdered the gay film director Pier Paolo Pasolini by repeatedly running him over with his own car on an Italian beach was named Giuseppe Pelosi. Hmm … Hustling must run in the family.”

Tis true! I once shot a man in Reno just to watch him die!

Slow–

“Have you participated in any form of organized policy making?”

Never mind that. Have you ever signed a contract for anything? Ever signed a mortgage? Ever bought an electronic device with a sheet, in four languages, of “warnings”? When/if you did, did you read the whole thing?

Ever done anything but parrot idiotic wingnut cliches and end with “I wonder why that is…?”

Let’s just agree that you have literally no idea how stupid your idea is.

And when will you cretins learn that “largesse” has an e at the end? Too French? Man up. Deal with it.

And the rest of you can go to hell, too. That picture of David Bowie looks pretty good, considering.

Pass the Read the Bills Naked Act.

* Congress will be renamed Sexual Congress.
* Elections will henceforth be known as Erections.
* Voice votes will be referred to as Oral.
* Free lube

Rightists are the real anti-Yorkians.

By the way, it’s coming up on Sepetember ina few weeks, will you still be saying Fuck New York when it’s time for the ceremonial genuflection towards Ground Zero for saving your worthless rightist hides?

Also, I’ve been all over the country, from East to West, and I have to say… fuck Kentucky, you bunch of Transylvanian fuckwits.

Mr. W, you forgot Microsoft EULAS. I bet he read EVERY FUCKIN WORD of those.

Fuck New York. Once again, thank GOD we didn’t make that our capital city.

You can take remedial History while you’re doing remedial Civics.

I don’t feel sorry for the New Yorkers anymore about 9/11, after they voted to appease terrorists TWICE since the attacks (as did New Jersey and Connecticut). When it happens again, it will be because they voted for the wrong men.

Fuck New York.

I see SOMEONE forgot 9/11.

I don’t feel sorry for the New Yorkers anymore about 9/11

It’s ok, we still pity you.

You idiots can’t even get the Freedom Tower built. Morons. That’s what happens when your government consists of lib Democrats and RINOS.

Birthers In The News

That’s what happens when your government consists of lib Democrats and RINOS.

George Pataki will be pleased to see you paint him as a liberal.

Pataki is a RINO.

The Freedom Tower debacle is a perfect example of government not working. They should have sold the land off to private interests, they would have something built by now. Fools.

You can’t tell the players without a program? Christ on a fucking biscuit, it’s got to the point where even the fucking players can’t tell themselves apart.

(Also, sorry about the other day: I was hammered.)

You idiots can’t even get the Freedom Tower built. Morons. That’s what happens when your government consists of lib Democrats and RINOS.

Yeah, let’s see who’s been in power the last eight years, and for how many of those years did one party control the executive branch and both the House and Senate… damn! What was the name of that political party again?

Actually it’s the Port Authority that can’t get 1 World Trade Center rebuilt.

The Freedom Tower debacle is a perfect example of government not working.

Developer and private entrepreneur Larry Silverstein…ooops, another Jew…is the one who is slowing the process down. I’ll let him know he is now a liberal Jew Democrat. I’m sure he’ll immediately revoke both of his votes for Bush.

The WTC site is controlled by the governments of NYC, NY state, and NJ. Who controls them? Democrats and RINOs.

If Dallas had been attacked something would be built by now.

When it happens again, it will be because they voted for the wrong men.

That sounds like someone knows something they aren’t telling. I’m afraid we’re going to have to tear off your fingernails, nail your feet to a floor and begin sawing into your neck.

Y’know, like Jack Bauer.

It’s the only way to get information from terrorist sympathizers like yourself.

The Freedom Tower debacle is a perfect example of government not working.

And yet we have to pass this “Read My Bill, Libs!” bullshit to “slow down” the government ’cause they’re doing too much too fast.

You could at least TRY to stay consistent, you know, Chad.

If Dallas had anything worth attacking.

Slow Congress Down–Make Them Read the Bills said,
August 12, 2009 at 17:12
I want Congress to be slow as possible, and so do all movement conservatives. SLOW CONGRESS DOWN!

You don’t want it slowed down, you want to back it up…to somewhere in the 1950s, when ur hero Joe McCarthy was around. Gov’t DID something back then, amirite? Sussed out all them commies!

And since you’re so all fired up about doing the safe thing (like reading every bill) then consistency would demand you have no problem with helmet laws, no smoking laws, seatbelt laws, and any other laws that mandate what common sense would normally cover. I’m sure you’re behind that stuff 100% too.

Slow Congress Down–Make Them Read the Bills,

And your nym is about the most bassackward take on government imaginable: if you think your congressman isn’t reading the bills, elect one you think will. That’s how representative democracy works.

The WTC site is controlled by the governments of NYC, NY state, and NJ. Who controls them? Democrats and RINOs.

No, the WTC site is owned by the Port Authority of NY and NJ, and managed by Silverstein Properties and the Lower Manhattan Development Corporation. All the government can do is be pissy that it’s not on schedule.

Hear that, New Yorkers? Next time you’re attacked by some rogue terrorist group, you’ll have to bomb Iraq ALL BY YOURSELVES.

Lower Manhattan Development Corporation

Not a politico in sight on the board.

AND A PONY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

All the government can do is be pissy that it’s not on schedule.

But maybe you [Slow Congress Down] can help them with that; it seems to be your one calling in this world. Critical analysis, and a command of factual information–not so much.

Why do they keep bringing back the worst parts of the 1990s?

Oh, Christ, no.

Please, not that.

Anything but the Backstreet Boys and the Spice Girls.

NOOOOooooooo!!!!!

Sex Congress Up–Make Them Read the Bills Naked.

* Confirmation hearings replaced with pole-dancing auditions
* Filibusters automatically end at orgasm
* Arlen Specter wouldn’t be allowed to change parties, because only bisexuals would be allowed to switch sides
* When people say that politicians are fucking the country, they will be correct in the literal sense.
* Did I mention Free Lube?

Worse, justme.

We’re bringing back 98 Degrees and the Brian Setzer Orchastra. That’s right, crappier knock-offs of the Backstreet Boys, and guys from the 80s revamping themselves as ‘swing’.

* Filibusters automatically end at orgasm

a) Do you see how many wrinkled old white guys are Republican???? We’ll be there all frikkin month!

b) If your erection lasts more than four hours, consult your parliamentarian.

Good thing the Congressional medical plan covers Viagra.

and guys from the 80s 70s revamping themselves as ’swing’.

Buster Poindexter.

Sex Congress Up–Make Them Read the Bills Naked…

Jeebus–gotta go bleach my brain.

*Require a 3/4 majority in both houses to raise taxes

Hee hee, and when there are 76% Dems , they’ll be all “require a 4/5 majority!” usw

Tell you what, why not compromise on the “read the whole thing” act? Require that all bills put forth by Republicans that make it out of committee be read aloud, receive 75% superdupermajority, etc, to pass, you know, as kind of a trial run. If it works well it could be expanded to cover Dem bills as well.

Require that all bills put forth by Republicans that make it out of committee be read aloud

Oh they’ll just pad their bills with the same shit we used to write for that first essay each school year.

“In this bill, the purpose of the bill that the author states is to require that the author and the other Congressmen…”

21 words! Only 999,999,979 left!

* All bills must be written with hearts over the “i”s.

This story on Rich Lowry cries out for SN’s attention.

*Require a 3/4 majority in both houses to raise taxes

Why not a super-majority to enact tax breaks for the top 1% of the income bracket?

b) If your erection filibuster lasts more than four hours, consult your parliamentarian.

I hate when I stumble across the funny joke AFTER I press “Submit”

They need to READ THE BILLS THEY PASS.

Well, in Troofie’s defense, it really won’t be all that hard to verify whether Republicans read the bills or not. Just watch for their lips moving.

ahem.

ALL BILLS MUST BE WRITTEN IN THE BLOOD OF THE INFIDELS!!

…wait, do we have Shania law yet?

Do you see how many wrinkled old white guys are Republican

See, that’s the beauty of this plan. If you knew that Sexual Congress was meeting naked, would you vote for David Vitter or Stormy Daniels?

We forgot to tell you — the new Freedom Tower is being redesigned as a giant statue of Malcolm X. But reconstruction will begin shortly.

Oh they’ll just pad their bills with the same shit we used to write for that first essay each school year.

21 words! Only 999,999,979 left!

That’ll be the bill when it comes to committee, before it’s allowed to leave it’ll be whittled down to “Hey everybody, I have a big butt, my butt smells and I like to smell my own butt” which the original sponsor will have to read aloud into the record.

Also, I have an even better idea.

Speed Up Congress – Turn It Into A Reality Show!

* All Congresspeople will be required to remain in the Capitol building at all times, at all hours of the day, throughout their term.

* To ensure this, all doors except to Congressional offices and the Rotunda will be locked and barred.

* Including bathrooms.

* Especially bathrooms.

* All lobbyists must be shot. This is to ensure a fair vote.

* When a Congressperson fulfills a quota of ratified and passed bills, they will be released. Only up votes count, all negative votes subtract from the quota.

* Also, steroid-abusing ubermensch will roam the halls of the Capitol, killing Congresspeople for the entertainment of C-SPAN viewers.

See, that’s the beauty of this plan. If you knew that Sexual Congress was meeting naked, would you vote for David Vitter or Stormy Daniels?

Well, maybe it would help repugs get that whole “elections have consequences” thing. And eventually it could mean that C-SPAN’s ratings would go through the roof, but the transition period would not be pleasant.

*Require a 3/4 majority in both houses to raise taxes

Perfect example of the stupid fucking bullshit this Read the Bills thing is. If Congress gets shut down, tax increases are going to be handled through Title 26. Oh, and for Slow Congress Down here’s the text for him to read. IOW, the IRS will get to pick whatever taxation plan they want i.e. a communist marginal tax rate of 200,000%. And then they can use Title 44 to build giant super-prisons, ostensibly for illegal immigrants, but actually for dissidents and 2nd amendment enthusiasts and tax debtors.

FFS, I’m a crazy leftist lefty Obot and I’m totally against the sort of crazy power the executive branch would have with this bill. Because I’m not CRRRAAAAZZZZYYYYYYY.

Trotsky,

*shudder*

Though if we can limit the spread, and keep Post-Grunge out of it, there may be a few survivors.

Lord, anything but Creed.

Teabaggers, keepin’ it classy and democratic.

And this story ALSO doesn’t mention the Paulista packing heat at the NH meeting. Instead it was decribed as “cordial”. Yeah, “cordial” if you ignore the guy with the gun within shooting range of the President.

Congress shall also pass laws praising the enormity of my giant-size man-thing.

Resolved, Troofiedoodle’s cable TV remote is the largest in the history of mankind.

Oh, you meant PENIS. I see.

troofie, do you propose providing reading tutors to help cracker southern senators who cain’t read nothin’ wut aint got pitchers?

And before you mouth off about the heartland, dicknostril, just wanted ta let ya know I’ve lived and worked in rural midwest red states for years. And our state got sick of our boys coming home legless from a war that wasn’t even against the perps of nine-lebben, so we voted our repubes out.

Suck it, cracker. Kentucky is a joke even to West Virginians.

Let’s really make it interesting, and just get rid of elections. We can pick our representatives randomly – do it like we do jury duty, or pick names out of the phone book, or sell lottery tickets or whatever. That way, everyone has an equal chance of making sure that someone will be in Washington representing their personal views and beliefs.

It will work, I’m sure of it!!!

FFS, I’m a crazy leftist lefty Obot and I’m totally against the sort of crazy power the executive branch would have with this bill.

Like I said, these assholes really want a dictatorship.

We can pick our representatives randomly – do it like we do jury duty, or pick names out of the phone book, or sell lottery tickets or whatever.

I’m reminded of… I think maybe Bill Hicks or George Carlin proposing the ‘parachuting chimpanzee’ process.

Basically, you put a parachute on a chimpanzee, then toss it out a plane. When it lands and gets up, the first person who it grabs is the new President.

Oh, good, we’re back to that whole “flyover/heartland” crapola. I have to hear this nonsense from residents of MY OWN STATE because I have the temerity to live in its second largest city. “Oh, your opinion shouldn’t count, ’cause you don’t have shit on your boots”. News flash: Sometimes what the “elite/liberal/urbanite/insertsupposedlyderogatorytermhere” want comes to pass democratically, BECAUSE LOTS OF PEOPLE LIVE IN CITIES. That’s why they’re called cities.

Teabaggers, keepin’ it classy and democratic.

Don’t yet know why none of these meetings has been opened by the local sheriff standing up before the crowd and saying “We understand some of y’all intend to harm our elected officials. That’s against the law. Any of you out-of-town motherfuckers who so much as raises his voice above normal speaking level or who speaks out of turn is gonna get hauled out of here and treated to a night in jail. Sorry to have to do that, but that’s the way we treat rioters and troublemakers here. You can be civil, or you can miss your bus tomorrow morning.”

Why not cut out the middleman and make the chimp the new Preznit?

I mean, he could hardly do a worse job than the last guy we had.

Like I said, these assholes really want a dictatorship.

Conservatards loves them some Authoritah!

That’s why they’re called cities.

Actually, “From Middle English cite < Old French cité < Latin civitas ("a union of citizens", "a citizenry")", but yeah, the intent is there.

Why not cut out the middleman and make the chimp the new Preznit?

Because, silly, then you have a whole other issue to solve: how do you pick which chimp to parachute out of the plane?

If everyone who has ever wondered how Paglia has a job, or why anyone listens to her, were obliged to send me a dime, I could buy my own Intertooobz.

Wow, trolly’s awful quiet. You don’t suppose he’s actually reading the Federal Register do you?

“There is one area in which I think Paglia and I would agree that
politically correct feminism has produced a noticeable inequity.
Nowadays, when a woman behaves in a hysterical and disagreeable
fashion, we say, “Poor dear, it’s probably PMS.” Whereas, if a man
behaves in a hysterical and disagreeable fashion, we say, “What an
asshole.” Let me leap to correct this unfairness by saying of Paglia,
Sheesh, what an asshole.”

From the late great Molly.

If everyone who has ever wondered how Paglia has a job, or why anyone listens to her, were obliged to send me a dime, I could buy my own Intertooobz.

So who does that leave to actually read her dreck? You know, thus justifying her employment?

I’m beginning to think the biggest mistake we made was getting rid of the Articles of Confederation.

That was Hamilton’s idea, and of course he was from New York. Fucking shit!

Yeah, because we were doing such a wonderful job of remaining a nation under them.

We had our LIBERTY.

You know, thus justifying her employment?

Serial contrarians, just like her.

Slow Congress Down–Make Them Read the Bills said,
August 12, 2009 at 17:24

“And anyone that receives largess from the Feds shouldn’t be able to vote, either, so they can’t vote themselves more largess from the public treasury.”

Everyone shouldn’t vote?! Can I be the dictator?

God damn it, I was looking forward to reading a nice, long thread filled with people kicking Camille Haglia’s bony, liver-spotted, wrinkled old ass, and instead, it didn’t take long for our retard troll to spoil my fun! Shenanigans!

Bitter Scribe said,

If everyone who has ever wondered how Paglia has a job, or why anyone listens to her, were obliged to send me a dime, I could buy my own Intertooobz.

She’s the picture next to “attention troll” in the encyclopedia.
~

I feel your pain, John D.

Slow Congress Down–Make Them Read the Bills said,
August 12, 2009 at 18:57

“I’m beginning to think the biggest mistake we made was getting rid of the Articles of Confederation.”

Why do you hate America?

We had our LIBERTY.

To do what with? Fucking catchphrases aren’t going to fly as the only reason to discard the entire Constitution that kept us alive for 200+ years, where the Articles couldn’t survive a decade without proving to be entirely untenable as a nation-unifying document.

The Constitution is too loose with its language. Under the Constitution we’ve consistently lost more and more liberties and freedoms.

Ex. in 1900 the ONLY federal taxes were tariffs, and the only time a normal citizen outside the military had to interact with the federal government was when they went to the post office.

Compare that to now.

Am I the only one who has noticed that the Lunch Lady has a very attractive new hairnet?

Fuck. I jinxed it.

Let’s really make it interesting, and just get rid of elections. We can pick our representatives randomly – do it like we do jury duty, or pick names out of the phone book, or sell lottery tickets or whatever.

You know, sometimes I think that wouldn’t be such a bad idea. Here’s how to make it work:

Serving in congress would be like serving on a jury. There would be very few exemptions – in fact, almost none. Every few years, at least half of them would be recycled for new Reps.

However, the pay for a Representative would be, at minimum, a million dollars a year, tax free. They would have their own mansion, and their own private jet they could use for any purpose they wish. (This helps insulate them from outright bribery.)

They would have the assistance of a large civil service to advise them, but none of the civil servants would work directly for any particular Rep, with the possible exception of a few clerical workers. Lobbyists would have access to the Reps, but no access to the civil servants themselves. The civil service would be very well paid, but both Reps and civil servants would be forever banned from working as lobbyists.

Debates would be held openly, but all votes on legislation would be by secret ballot. Only the final tally would be made public.

We trust the life-or-death fate of individuals to random juries, so why can’t we trust the fate of nations to them?

So who does that leave to actually read her dreck? You know, thus justifying her employment?

Oh right wingers love her. Drudge sends them over to read her columns in droves, and Limbaugh. And a smattering of other barely sentient beings who call themselves “liberals” and think that she’s “refreshing”, which means that it’s amazing anyone trusts them to get themselves dressed in the morning.

It’s mostly Wingnuts now though. It’s a house of mirrors, they call her a liberal and she calls them brilliant. Like Rush.

What a shame Salon is, if it weren’t for Greenwald and TT it would be a total loss.

Joe Max – dear God, you can’t be serious.

Remember Jennifer’s Maxim: Half of all people are of below-average intelligence.

Under the system of elections we have now, the stupid have plenty of representation, but we have a fighting chance of holding it to below half of all elected officials.

To whom?

Who’s gaining your liberties or freedoms?

Because over the centuries, most people have apparently gained liberty and freedom in this nation under the Constitution, while the original beneficiaries of it still have kept the majority of the rights, with the exclusion of no longer getting to own people like chattel.

Is that all? I mean, if your upset over that loss, I don’t think a whole lot of people are going to be sympathetic.

both Reps and civil servants would be forever banned from working as lobbyists

I think this right here would do a lot to fix what ails Congress, all by itself.

Descent is the highest form of patriotic. Why do you libs hate America?
‘
Refresh my toast, Gibbs!

We had our LIBERTY.

Define “liberty”, shitweasel.

I swear to Gobbs, there’s a bag of hammers somewhere that’s saying “Jeez, at least I’m not THAT stupid!”

Liberty=property rights.

Jennifer – I’m half-serious.

The amount of uber-stupid we have under the current system makes me think it couldn’t be any worse.

Since it’s “term-limited”, the real power would be in the Congressional Civil Service – except they can’t vote. They would fill the ecological niche that lobbyists fill now. And they can never retire to become lobbyists.

Slow Congress Down–Make Them Read the Bills said,
The Constitution is too loose with its language. Under the Constitution we’ve consistently lost more and more liberties and freedoms.

Unless you were a slave, where you went from being three-fifths of a person, to being a whole person. Would you rather go back to those days, Troofie?

Liberty=property rights.

No, that’s “libirtie=property rights.”

HHHHHNNNNNNNNNGGGGGGHHHHHH!

I sense a disturbance in The Force … a silent scream from legions of brains suddenly cast into unspeakable pain & torment. A shockwave of pure terror that paralyzes the spirit & destroys all hope of … oh.

Oh, wait, it’s just Camille Paglia. Never mind.

Help pass the Read the Bills Act.

TL;DR.

However, the troll is to be congratulated on having a few remaining molecules of honesty – openly admitting that you WANT government to be unworkable (renew bills every two years – no, every month – oh what the hell, let’s make it every time the big hand is on the 5!), slow (read every word of every bill, LOL) & irredeemably corrupt (unsalaried pols – hey, didn’t they try that once in Albania?) until Congress becomes the Politburo circa 1985 … that takes real balls catastrophic brain-damage.

Compare that to now.

Gee… why, it’d almost seem like there’s been a full century of growth in this nation since 1900. Indeed, I would gather that there are many more people in America compared to 1900, that there were a cavalcade of inventions and innovations that took place over a 109 years, and that as these things changed, a state government could no longer be expected to adequately fulfill the needs of each and every constituent.

But I’m sure that’s all hogwash, and we could certainly run a 21-century first-world nation utilizing William McKinley’s tactics to keep a turn-of-the-century Victorian-era America alive.

Liberty=property rights.

*snerk*

Yeah, gLibertarian douchebag, confirmed.

You were close, troofy. The worst thing wasn’t getting rid of the Articles of Confederacy, it was letting the Confederate States come back into the USA. Should let the cracker traitor scum hang out to dry on their cotton plantations.

If we had, of course, you’d have the “freedom” you desire, to wallow in your own third world racist cesspool, where the technology never surpassed the cotton gin.

Imagine, no NASCAR! And before you call me a city bwoayuh who dn’t know frum racecars, I used to watch CART/Indycar from the pit.

Ex. in 1900 the ONLY federal taxes were tariffs, and the only time a normal citizen outside the military had to interact with the federal government was when they went to the post office.

Compare that to now.

Jeebus man, the world has changed.

Things you might want to check up on: the assembly line, nuclear power, the information age (that snazzy intertoobs thing we happen to be using right now).

I get that things we’re simpler back then but bringing back a simpler form of government won’t mitigate all the complexity that’s happened.

Representatives face re-election every two years – that’s pretty short. The mechanism for accountability is already there, the only problem is that incumbency rates are sky high and party national committees are so very primary adverse. If there’s any place to address the issue of representation, I think it’s in those areas.

I don’t think term limits would help much either, as the lame duck usually has a shit-ton of influence in selecting their successor. Plus good reps, genuinely accountable and attentive to their constituents, should be allowed to serve as long as their voters would have ’em.

How to fix it? Dunno. Maybe if Congresscritters had to do all of the business of government while naked, the ravages of time and aging would ensure a constant influx of fresh young hard-bodied policy-makers.

The glibertarian “property rights” schtick is always interesting. In the USA, where did all the “property rights” come from? From the “property” stolen from natives and bestowed for free upon white guys by… the federal government!

So because my greaty-great granpaw got a land grant from President Polk’s administration, that means it’s my GOD-given right to continue to own it!

To say nothing of how many more people there are today. Here’s a quick 5 minute precis, maybe that will help put things in perspective.

Liberty=property rights.

So it is about the slave-owning then?

Elected representatives should be required to instantly respond to live online polls to make policy.

From the “property” stolen from natives and bestowed for free upon white guys by… the federal government!

Wait, let me guess Twoofie’s wesponswe: “Duh, those Indians didn’t have an army so we had a right to take it”.

And army created by… a strong central government! Howzaboutdat.

Why does Twoofie hate our military?

* Elected officials should not only have to read every bill they pass, but go around to the homes of all their consituents and explain it to them personally.

Jennifer’s Maxim: Half of all people are of below-average intelligence.

The truth is even scarier: most people are of average intelligence … & in America, all the signs point to said average steadily falling since about 1980. That’s 30 solid years of DUHvolution. Technology has been getting ever-more-powerful & complex at the same time, which means we’re well on our way to the exciting & dramatic “Caveman With A Machinegun” scenario. Invest in body-armor futures.

Ex. in 1900 the ONLY federal taxes were tariffs, and the only time a normal citizen outside the military had to interact with the federal government was when they went to the post office state-hired Pinkertons &/or soldiers were shitkicking them or shooting them like dogs for trying to unionize.

Compare that to now.

Fixed that for you. You’re welcome.

However, the pay for a Representative would be, at minimum, a million dollars a year, tax free. They would have their own mansion, and their own private jet they could use for any purpose they wish.

hehehehehehehehehe

The glibertarian “property rights” schtick is always interesting.

My grandpappy had a sayin’, “If’n yew cain’t taik et wif yew, yew ain’t et’s oner”.

That old Finn had a lot more sense than this fucking moran.

How to fix it? Dunno. Maybe if Congresscritters had to do all of the business of government while naked, the ravages of time and aging would ensure a constant influx of fresh young hard-bodied policy-makers.

You left off “throbbing”…

Things you might want to check up on: the assembly line, nuclear power, the information age (that snazzy intertoobs thing we happen to be using right now).

The car, the plane, central heating, flush toilets, the polio vaccine, the radio, television, telephones, electrical lighting…

But hey, if it was good enough for 1900 it should still work fine in 2009! Nothing has changed at all! And people who tell you it has are lying and probably believe the world’s older than 6,000 years.

“Caveman With A Machinegun”

So in a fight, would you bet on the caveman with a machine gun, or the astronaut with a nail board?

The car, the plane, central heating, flush toilets, the polio vaccine, the radio, television, telephones, electrical lighting…

WHOA!

czars and telephones both existed in 1900!

So did cars, come to think of it…

*checking out new fingers*

What a shame Salon is, if it weren’t for Greenwald and TT it would be a total loss.

That’s for sure.

I wonder whatever happened to Fred Kaplan; I remember liking the work he did writing about military issues.

Define “liberty,” shitweasel.

(Troofie typing to Talking Points Central)

“They want me to define “liberty.” Now what do I say?”

(Troofie reads response, scratches head)

“Tell them it means property rights. Just write out ‘Liberty=property rights.’ ”

(Troofie typing)

“But what does that mean?”

(Troofie reading)

“Never mind what it means, just TYPE it!”

(Troofie typing)

…

“The truth is even scarier: most people are of average intelligence … & in America, all the signs point to said average steadily falling since about 1980. ”

That’s what happens when you have more latinos in the gene pool.

When we go back to 1900, can we get rid of all the cars and planes and telephones too?

Cuz that shit bothers me.

So in a fight, would you bet on the caveman with a machine gun, or the astronaut with a nail board?

Astronaut, no question. Machine guns are hard to use without extensive training.

Although terrain has to be considered; on a flat plain the caveman might get lucky.

I am chuckling at the fact that a thread snarkily entitled “a Voice of Sanity” has attracted so much insanity from our Subsidized Troller.

OT, it seems subsidies also created a lot of ID trollery at PZ Myers place. It seems the Right can’t get anybody to support their ideas unless they are paid.

We had our LIBERTY

You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.

Oooh!

A RACIST gLibertarian shitweasel, yet. Fancy that.

A RACIST antisemitic gLibertarian shitweasel, yet. Fancy that.

Fixed for completeness

Remember, people.

Baby FSM cries each time you respond to the parody troll.
~

Machine guns are hard to use without extensive training.

Huh? Most heartlanders can fire one and they’re about as easy to train as a blind chimpanzee with autism.

#

Slow Congress Down–Make Them Read the Bills said,

August 12, 2009 at 19:43 (kill)

“The truth is even scarier: most people are of average intelligence … & in America, all the signs point to said average steadily falling since about 1980. ”

That’s what happens when you have more latinos in the gene pool.

wow. That’s just precious, I wanted to look at it again.

You racist shitweasel. I see badgers in your future.

You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.

Yeah, I would have thought that the government snooping into emails and phonecalls would be antithetical to the concept of liberty but I guess since we didn’t have those modes of communication in 1900, we don’t need to consider them. And no one knew about waterborading so…

Yeah, liberty = gated community in the OC. I got mine bitchez!

Baby FSM cries each time you respond to the parody troll.

Are they tears of marinara sauce?

Huh? Most heartlanders can fire one and they’re about as easy to train as a blind chimpanzee with autism.

Fire or hit something? Two different propositions entirely.

So the question is did we just hand the machine to the caveman or is someone training him?

Are they tears of marinara sauce?

We need some mozzarella sticks over here, STAT!

Fire or hit something? Two different propositions entirely.

Cavemen are extremely lucky! Just look at any GEICO commercial! They get motorbikes and hot chicks and Mediterranean vacations!

We need some mozzarella sticks over here, STAT!

CLEAR!

*kaCHOMP*

Cavemen are extremely lucky! Just look at any GEICO commercial! They get motorbikes and hot chicks and Mediterranean vacations!

Point taken.
=)

And an M-60 would make a better club than a board (with a nail!)…

But if we gave that gecko some nerve agent, I think he could take the caveman.

Cavemen are extremely lucky! Just look at any GEICO commercial! They get motorbikes and hot chicks and Mediterranean vacations!

AND they’re extinct so they don’t even have to pay taxes!

Man, cavemen get all the good stuff.

But if we gave that gecko some nerve agent, I think he could take the caveman.

300 quatloos on Flo the Cashier with a flamethrower!

Let’s see…if all bills have to be read out loud, and the budget alone is 2000 pages….why, I do think nothing would ever get done!

AND they’re extinct so they don’t even have to pay taxes!

You’re right! There’s no injustice greater than contributing to the greater good of the community.

Now, who do I see about getting my Federal Income Tax dollars back from the Red States?

why, I do think nothing would ever get done!

Until, of course, the Republicans come into power again.

300 quatloos on Flo the Cashier with a flamethrower!

Dammit! I had 500 quatloos on Colonel Mustard in the library with the candlestick!

why, I do think nothing would ever get done!

Until, of course, the Republicans come into power again.

In which case, they’d stop reading the bills because there wouldn’t BE any.

Just a thought — I don’t think Mr. Slow It All Down specified HOW the bill was to be read aloud. 535 Congresscritters, 2000 page bill, everyone gets 4 pages, and everyone reads at the same time. Presto. Done in 10 minutes.

A pro-tariff libertarian? Um, yipe?

Actually, people in 1900 also paid inheritance tax, so, you know, BZZZT. Plus, in Springer v. U.S. the Court had decided that an income tax falls “within the category of an excise or duty”, so I suppose you could say we still mostly pay duties. As an aside, in the latter half of the 29th century pro-tariff Republicans scared people into voting for them by branding Democrats “free marketeers”. NO, NOT THAT!

Also, those budget bills probably have tables and chart on ’em. How precisely are you supposedly to read those aloud and provide the proper context?

um, 19th. THOUGH THEY MAY DO IT IN THE 29TH TOO. Bastards.

300 quatloos on Flo the Cashier with a flamethrower!

Dammit! I had 500 quatloos on Colonel Mustard in the library with the candlestick!

Fools! It’s Troofie with his keyboard–think Harold and the purple crayon–Troofers will create an idyllic, late eighteenth century world in which there is no Colonel Mustard or flamethrowers! Only property rights and debutante balls.

If all bills had to be read, then bills would simply get shorter and simpler. Most would be less than a page.

Get rid of filibusters too, and congress could REALLY make some progress!

Coming soon: the “kick rush limbaugh in the balls act 2009”

So in a fight, would you bet on the caveman with a machine gun, or the astronaut with a nail board?

As usual in these questions, the important bits are left out. What condition are the combatants in? Neil Armstrong is pushing eighty, but any caveman we could find right not would probable be thawed out of a glacier like in Encino Man. Well, Encino Man isn’t really a scientifically valid source for specifics about cryogenics and the reality is that a thawed caveman would likely have major health issues.

In the end, I’d say it would be a close fight, but the astronaut wins with a score of 73,200 to 71,700.

Remember Jennifer’s Maxim: Half of all people are of below-average intelligence.

Actually, only about 15% of people are of below-average intelligence. 70% of people land in the ‘average’ range of 85-114, and I don’t think there’s good evidence for superior judgment and empathy from a person of IQ 110 than from a person of IQ 90. Intelligence isn’t the issue — intentional ignorance and malice is.

I’d rather have an IQ 90 individual with respect for other human beings, a sense of skepticism, and an understanding of their own limitations in control of the reins of state than some sociopathic glibertarian choad with IQ 140. I’m sure the average IQ of the upper strata of the Bush administration was very high. I’d wager Dubya himself is at least in the high average range.

The problem isn’t intelligence, it’s that humans tend to be easily led and prejudicial, and most societies — including ours — lionize exploitative, domineering personalities and assist them in gaining power and wealth.

In the end, I’d say it would be a close fight, but the astronaut wins with a score of 73,200 to 71,700.

Excelent use of teh Google. You win the intertoobs–for now.

and most societies — including ours — lionize exploitative, domineering personalities and assist them in gaining power and wealth.

Exhibit A: Barack Obama.

Coming soon: the “kick rush limbaugh in the balls act 2009?

Your views interest me and I wish to subscribe to your newsletter.

I know it’s tacky to quote someone quoting ME but it works better if I do:

“The truth is even scarier: most people are of average intelligence … & in America, all the signs point to said average steadily falling since about 1980. ”

That’s what happens when you have more latinos Republicans dumbing down educational standards for most of three decades & corporate mass-media constantly abrogating their social responsibility to make people think for themselves in favor of cop-shows & “The Price Is Right” in the gene pool.

F1xx0red.

THOUGH THEY MAY DO IT IN THE 29TH TOO.

In the year 2525, if man is still alive, if woman can survive, cockroaches like Troofie will STILL be asking for tax cuts.

Exhibit A: Barack Obama.

Yes, so domineering.

Three words for you: “Go fuck yourself.”

Now who said that in the Senate?

I’d wager Dubya himself is at least in the high average range.

I’d take that bet.

most societies — including ours — lionize exploitative, domineering personalities and assist them in gaining power and wealth.

Ah, you’re aware of the Bush dynasty…

I have to agree with Djur. An IQ score says nothing about a persons ability to apply their intelligence to anything other than very simple exercises.

Most of it is about pattern matching. How many seconds does it take you to select which shape is the odd one out?

In the real world, you don’t have 5 shapes, you have 50 philosophies, and you have years to make your selection.

Too many intelligent people spend their time creating complicated and seemingly rational excuses for acting like a stupid person. Those people would be much happier if they were given a lobotomy. Then they wouldn’t need any excuses.

Hey wait, the Repubs already tried that whole “make ’em read the whole thing into the record” bit when the House energy bill was still in committee. Dems hired a speed reader and, once again, the Neener-Neener-I’m-Not-Touching-You Caucus shuffled off, wondering how all that banana cream got all over their faces.

jim:

Now, hang on a minute. All that other shit may be true, but I will not see or hear a bad word about The Price Is Right. That there is the best of America, my friend.

Also, remember to spay or neuter your trolls.

eep

Also, remember to spay or neuter your trolls.

Does a swift kick in the nuts with steel toe boots count?

“actor212 said,

August 12, 2009 at 20:33

Also, remember to spay or neuter your trolls.

Does a swift kick in the nuts with steel toe boots count?”

Effect of such kick may be temporary, so it should be repeated about once a week for a year or so to be sure.

Does a swift kick in the nuts with steel toe boots count?

Perfectly adequate. After a running start of course.

Folks, I failed you all. Last night, I attended a lecture by a botanist who travelled to the Louisiade Islands of New Guinea, and I neither photographed, nor tried on the PENIS! gourds she had purchased in a market.

On topic, here’s an audio recording of an Obama death panel.

“Ow My Balls!”

In a thread dominated by Slow Child. Appropriate.

Hey everyone,

All this talk about how people wearing guns get within range of the president over the last few threads reminded me of this — the secret service was subsumed by Bush’s DHS and as a result, budget cuts and laziness have taken over: http://www.thedailyshow.com/watch/mon-august-3-2009/ronald-kessler

“anyone that receives largess from the Feds shouldn’t be able to vote, either, so they can’t vote themselves more largess from the public treasury”

So that mens any employees, officers or stockholders of Halliburton, Blackwater, KBR et al?

Camille Paglia = Annette Benning in ‘Running with Scissors.’

Effect of such kick may be temporary, so it should be repeated about once a week for a year or so to be sure.

I dunno. I suspect the line will be much longer than that schedule can accomodate.

LOL, ot, but,

Hawking responds.

Now, hang on a minute. All that other shit may be true, but I will not see or hear a bad word about The Price Is Right.

*sigh*

It just isn’t the same without Dian.

Also, remember to spay or neuter your trolls.

There’s a tweezer joke in there somewhere…

“Price is WRONG, bitch.”

Camille Paglia = Annette Benning in ‘Running with Scissors.’

= Kevin Bacon in Six Degrees of Separation.

Perhaps every congresscritter should have a secret service bodyguard, 24/7, who is ordered to shoot lobbyists on sight.

And perhaps before a person is allowed to run for office, they should be required to get a psychiatrist to testify that they are not a sociopath.

Only property rights and debutante balls.

If my debutante had balls, she’d be my debutuncle.

LOL, ot, but,

Hawking responds.

Yeah, and did you see how their “correction” carefully didn’t incorporate any of the facts contrary to their original claim? Are the wingnuts using any arguments against healthcare reform that rely on verifiable information?

Are the wingnuts using any arguments against healthcare reform that rely on verifiable information?

Sadly(?), No!

Sadly(?), No!

[sigh] Too ture.

GINGRICH:…We know people who have said routinely, well, you’re going to have to make decisions. You’re going to have to decide. Communal standards historically is a very dangerous concept.

STEPHANOPOULOS: It’s not in the bill.

GINGRICH: But the bill’s — the bill’s 1,000 pages of setting up mechanisms…

err… “true.”

If my debutante had balls, she’d be my debutuncle.

+1

Getting back to Paglia, I recall she wrote a series of columns in the 90’s during the early days of Clinton’s sex scandals, in which she very loudly and triumphantly patted herself on the back, congratulating herself about not having any problems with a President that actually had a sex life. But then, of course, her buddies on the right simply would not shut up about it, demonizing Clinton further and further (while he continued to legislate their agenda for them, of course), and obviously having so much fun kicking around a chickenshit neoliberal who refused to fight back that Paglia couldn’t resist leaping on the bandwagon…and so dear Camille rather abruptly changed her mind, starting with a column that compared Clinton to Bluebeard, if you will.

Ah, the lofty intellectuality of it all!

GINGRICH: But the bill’s — the bill’s 1,000 pages of setting up mechanisms… <

THERE'S NO BILL YET!!!

Gingirch is a shitstain, doesn't anybody remember? I thought we tossed him out. He's tougher to get rid of than a plantar wart.

GINGRICH: But the bill’s — the bill’s 1,000 pages of setting up mechanisms…

THERE’S NO BILL YET!!!

Gingrinch is a shitstain. Didn’t we toss him out years ago? The lump is harder to get rid of than a plantar wart.

Zombies get warts? I’m telling you, this site is Mecca for the most arcane and useful knowledge.

THERE’S NO BILL YET!!!

But it could be a long bill! Clearly the Dems are trying to disadvantage people with short attention spans.

Am I the only one who has noticed that the Lunch Lady has a very attractive new hairnet?

I’m still grooving on her support hose.

Gingrinch is a shitstain. Didn’t we toss him out years ago?

Yeah, I politely made this point when I called my Blue Dog representative recently to urge him to support actual health care reform. I pointed out that he’d outlasted the Contract with America, the dark years of the early Bush Admin when it was looking likely that Democrats were going to be outlawed entirely, and the Permanent Republican Majority, so he could sack up and vote like a Democrat already.

Zombies get warts? I’m telling you, this site is Mecca for the most arcane and useful knowledge.

Knowledge of zombie warts is useful?

Anyway, zombies used to be alive, and most of us were subject to the typical ailments.

Now that I think of it, “Zombie Wart” is a good name for our Resident Idiot.

Also good metal band name.

Stupid troll doesn’t even know how to spell largesse. I would bet he mispronounces quite common words: urticate, salpinx, bordereau.

He also doesn’t know the definition. He thinks it means “money that goes to brown skinned people”

Heh heh. Heh heh. He thaid “urticate”…heh heh…

This needed some editing:

“The 17-year-old husitler who in 1975 murdered the gay film director Pier Paolo Pasolini by repeatedly running him over with his own car on an Italian beach was named Giuseppe Pelosi. Hmm … Husitling must run in the family.”

Slow Congress Down–Make Them Read the Bills said,
August 12, 2009 at 19:43

“The truth is even scarier: most people are of average intelligence … & in America, all the signs point to said average steadily falling since about 1980. ”

That’s what happens when you have more conservatives in the gene pool. (fixed)

I think most Americans are below average in smarts. Wingnuts bring the average down.

“What would Jesus do?”
Let no member of congress vote on a bill unless they take an oath that Jesus has personally given them instructions. How could that possibly be wrong?

Paglia is so predictable and dispicable.