The opposite of what?
Poor, poor Debbie Schlussel:
Actor Tommy Lee Jones, who has been Gore’s friend since Harvard, directed and stars in “The Three Burials of Melquiades Estrada.” This movie is an outrage.
Not only does the film portray illegal aliens as nice, innocent, abused people; but Border Patrol Agents are portrayed as evil, cold-blooded murderers of illegal aliens who do nothing else but masturbate to Hustler Magazine. [snicker] […]
When we first see [illegal immigrant] Estrada, he is a dead body being eaten by Coyotes. Border Patrol Agents and a local sheriff, played by Dwight Yoakam, don’t give a damn about him. Because he’s illegal, they don’t treat him like a human being. In real life, authorities in border towns know it’s the exact opposite.
In real life, dead illegal immigrants eat coyotes! (Sorry, Coyotes.)
Seriously [sic] folks, but how about this little inspired bit of wisdom:
Despite criticism from advocates for immigrants, federal immigration officials said in recent days that they would not forswear the practice of impersonating occupational safety officials to round up illegal immigrants.
Or these guys:
Future generations will inherit a tangle of rancorous, unassimilated, squabbling cultures with no common bond to hold them together, and a certain guarantee of the death of this nation as a harmonious “melting pot.”
Of course, it’s hard to have anything resembling an intelligent discussion with someone who faults a fictional movie for not being a documentary. [Debbie via TBOGG, NYT thanks to Pinki.]
I seriously doubt that any movie would portray Border Patrol agents as doing nothing else besides masturbating over Hustler. How exactly would that fit into a movie plot, if a major character only does one thing for the entire movie? Maybe a Warhol avant-garde feelm could get away with that, but not a general release picture.
As for the “exact opposite,” do you suppose she means that it’s the Border Patrol agents who get eaten by coyotes while the illegal immigrants get played by Dwight Yoakam?
Jesus- has this woman never left her fucking suburb? The melting pot was a poorly picked metaphor which suggests that everyone adopted the same goddamn customs and mannerisms (and color?).
Going to the houses of an Irish-American family and a Norweigan-American family who arrived at the exact same time (and kept marrying within their town), you’ll see a shitload of differance.
A casserole is more accurate- all sorts of differant flavors, united by location (and gooey cheese) into one delicious though often burnt dish.
On a side note- are those Border Patrol agents masturbating to Hustler while they’re watching the dead guy get eaten? ‘Cause that would be fuckin’ hardcore!
Not only does the film portray illegal aliens as nice, innocent, abused people…
She knows this isn’t true because in Independence Day these so-called innocent aliens BLEW UP THE WHITEHOUSE!
…but Border Patrol Agents are portrayed as evil, cold-blooded murderers of illegal aliens who do nothing else but masturbate to Hustler Magazine.
Murder by masturbation!
Geez, I’d be tempted to murder those illegal aliens myself if all they’re gonna do is masturbate to Hustler Magazine! I mean, shouldn’t they be mowing lawns or picking fruit or something?
Wow! Li’l Debbie Snackcakes has been on a roll lately! This column is astonishingly stupid, and the mind-boggling thing is… it isn’t even the dumbest thing she’s written this year! Now, THAT’S some quality idiocy. If I’d know she had these depths of moronicness in her, I would never have voted her out of the Ultimate Wingnut Challenge (2005) over at World O’ Crap as quickly as I did.
No relation, I swear.
When we first see [illegal immigrant] Estrada, he is a dead body being eaten by Coyotes.
Damn! I knew the Phoenix Coyotes were tough, but I never figured them for eating illegal immigrants.
Good source of protein- plus the act builds team spirit and fraternal bonding.
I can’t believe you skipped over it…
Actor Tommy Lee Jones, who has been Gore’s friend since Harvard,
Guilt by association? Both ways actually.
Wait, so the dead guy is being cannibalized by the people he paid to transport him across the border?!?
Because that’s what a ‘Coyote’ is (as opposed to a ‘coyote’) …
Is Schlussel getting her columns typed by Kaye Grogan receiving dictation from Pastor Swank these days?
Is Schlussel getting her columns typed by Kaye Grogan receiving dictation from Pastor Swank these days?
And here I thought I’d heard all the latest euphemisms for sex….
And here I thought I’d heard all the latest euphemisms for sex….
Heh. If you want to observe the embodiment of a euphemism for sex, just visit the Marie Jon’ (or whatever her name is) discussion a few stories down.
Don’t get your hopes up though–it’s just another tiresome right-to-left lecture on chastity and marriage from an unmarried virgin, as poorly written as any hairball the Grogan-Swank duo could hack up.
“Backdoor Sin Tax” … starring Kaye ‘Gaggin’ Grogan and Pastor Swank … gahhhh! must go brush teeth …
Few writers make my blood boil the way Schlussel does. How this woman ever got access to a public forum is beyond me. She’s an Ann Coulter wannabe wannabe. And I’m being kind. You don’t want me to open up the can of verbal whup-ass I’ve got for this one. She’s in a special league all her own…
Give Debbie some slack. Tommy Lee Jones has had it in for the Border Patrol for years, as evidenced by his letting alla them undocumenteds go in the first scene in Men In Black.
Lil’ Debbie Snackcakes engages in some eliminationist rhetoric at the end of the piece when she says:
To paraphrase one of my readers, I look forward to the “Three Burials of Liberal Hollywood Producers.”
<sarcasm>No there’s nothing threatening about that,no! She’s just joking,right?</sarcasm>
SHUT UP MOONBATS AND GET A LOAD OF THESE KNOCKERS!!
SHUT UP MOONBATS AND GET A LOAD OF THESE KNOCKERS!!
LOL! Yeah, a couple of people commenting on her site mentioned her “shouting” in response to other comments and she responded in the following manner (I kid you not):
Twice. Exact same wording. You could’ve written a Perl script to do that. Just run comments through grep, and append a canned response (in all caps) appropriate to what pops out of grep.
And as to her comments that she does it to clarify what words are hers and what words are the original commenters’, there’s this little technology called a markup language you can use – the very technology by which she inflicts her spittle-flecked drivel on the sane part of the internets. One might (humbly) suggest that she look into it.
Oh, come on, J. A. Baker–Li’l Debbie Snackcakes? Markup language? Together again for the first time? I mean, you’re expecting a woman who has no sympathy for Native Americans getting their lands stolen from them by us because she’s convinced that the Native Americans stole North America from whoever was here before they were.
Now, what was that you were expecting her to do again?
Marq,
You’ll notice that that took place after I suggested that she could be replaced by a Perl script.
What?!? I was hungry, dang it.