definitely worth the previous clickies.

What appears to have happened is that after a half-century of concern-trolling her friends as a pretend Democrat (”Personally, I like the idea of a Negro in the White House but aren’t you worried that he’ll make Bill Ayers his attorney general?”) she stopped getting invited anywhere. Now she has a satisfying life as a wingnut mascot.

Now, that’s unfair. I mean, all Ms. Schlocky did was watch a political campaign and suddenly decide that global warming is caused by sunspots… and then, after some minor disagreements with a political party join the opposition… and make the assumption that it is necessary to be either a Democrat or a Republican, because if you’re neither you’re “wishy-washy”… and seem to think that Obama is a raging leftist…

Actually, never mind. You’re right.

& A Salad ¹

Now that I think of it, she reminds me of someone I once worked with. A Democrat, but only because of abortion. Total right-winger in every other respect. It was weird. I remember not understanding how someone could not have a problem with FISA. Oh, I was so naive.

Nevermind. Missed the cite after 11.95. And before y’all laugh, there but for the gracr of a larger monitor go you.

Gut instincts screaming from roof tops …this “thing” is really a Repub pretending to be a reformed Dem Lesbian to create the facade of validity as to what is opined in the intellectually constipated rants.

We all know, as this “thing” seems to be emulating: Drudge is gay as pink ink making the big bucks from the right wing who fund his trolling in Miami’s gay bars for expensive pretty boys he could never have for free…The wingers can’t help themselves if headlines are in RED fonts.

Red fonts are like bug zappers, they cannot fight their own instincts to feel the zap while funding the very man they all think is ruining their perfected marriages..

And then of course, the nation’s most vitriolic bitchy queen Coulter is yet anotehr fine example of cashing in on the wingers insatiable appetite for anything that validates what a civilized culture shuns.

PS…can’t see the left side of this screen, the list lays over the comment window so if there are typos, please excuse/translate through them.

I am a 55-year-old lesbian and over the course of the presidential campaign in 2008, my political views transformed from those of a lifelong liberal, Democrat and global warming believer to those of a fiscal conservative who rejects theories of anthropogenic climate change because we are so totally NOT more influential on the climate than the sun, sunspots, the ocean and ocean currents.

Hm. PUMA Hakaka???

I’m not sure why wingnut lesbians are so interesting to law professors from third tier law schools, but I’m suspecting that they both saw Bound on cable one night

Possibly together. On the same couch. In awkward silence save for the silent sound of *fap* *fap* *fap*.

I want to forward this crazy nutjob’s site to my wife and say “this is why you shouldn’t forward lolcats, you’ll look like this”

Whenever you say “newly conservative lesbian” I can’t help but to repeat it in a ridiculous English accent.

Nooooly consuhhhvative lessbeen.

Dear Penthouse:

I am a 55-year-old lesbian and over the course of the presidential campaign in 2008 the strangest thing happened…

OMFG! Cynthia Yockey is the scroll-troll! Seriously, her most recent post has a 4,965 word excerpt in the middle of it. I hope Yockey shares some of that salad with Carl Cannon (Carl Cannon? Seriously? Are you hoping some pr0n producers read your column and decide to hire you because you won’t need a new screen name?)

“I am a 55-year-old lesbian and over the course of the presidential campaign in 2008, my political views transformed…”

Shorter life-story:

Sarah Palin… ooohhh… hummina, hummina, scha…wing.

I have had bitter experiences at the hands of liberal fascists when I tried to get them to observe their stated principles

Maoist elitist islamomaniac liberals pretend to sympathize with the poor and downtrodden BUT THEY REFUSE TO GIVE ME MONEY FOR SALADS!!!!

Also, please note on her ‘About Me’ page that the ‘award’ she is so proud of? You can find out more about it here.

http://iowahawk.typepad.com/iowahawk/2009/01/you-may-already-be-a-winner.html

She really seems to get this internet-thing.

There are many lesbians who got seriously upset Democrats as a whole preferred Barack over Hillary. Bitter and PUMA will forever be an unattractive combination.

One quibble, “French, Fag or both?” Tintin: teabagging might not be the most appropriate reference for a rug muncher. Aside from that, I can totally see how she decided to become the token Daughter of Sappho to the big-tented GOP. She just went batshit insane one day, you see?

As a 27 year old lesbian, Sarah Palin isn’t that hot. Certainly not hot enough to change my political views. Of course, there appear to be far lower standards for politicians in that area.

Also, you know she saw Barack Obama and was all “wait, the Democrats like black people now? That’s not what my mother told me!”

Oh well, she’s a FISCAL conservative.

I’m sure in her mind this will protect her when the wingnuts get around to turning on her for her homoSEXSHULE ways. Yup, that’s gonna happen.

Who wants to bet that Ms. Yockey (such a shame her first name isn’t Terri) has that Crazy Ranting Lady’s “inadequate black male” quote as a ringtone.

This Cuban Diva person is purely a creation of Ms. Yockey’s psychosis. Take it to the bank.

As a gay male from a working class background, I have little tolerance for creatures like Ms. Yuckey. Either she’s faking it to make some easy bucks off the wingnut crowd as Augie suggets, or she’s sincere…in which case, she’s certifiably insane. Either way, she’s pandering to a group that would like nothing better than shove her (and all those like her) into a gas chamber.

She’s too stupid to live.

After 100 hours of research online, I learned that the moon landing was staged. Oh, and Vince Foster was muuuuuurrrrrdered!

Wow, a newly-minted Yoosta-Bee.

2004 wasn’t long enough ago for that to be retro.

Wowsers. So I figured I’d go over there and look around, see if she’s really that whacko. And it’s worse than I thought. I’m too tired to give an example. Won’t you buy me an Aston Martin?

PS – another quibble, Tintin my friend: “American Kobe” is completely misnomerawful. “American Kobe-style” or “Wagyu” if you please. The page you linked made the error but as the resident cuisine pedant, I am obligated to make the correction here.

kingubu said,

July 14, 2009 at 18:34
Who wants to bet that Ms. Yockey (such a shame her first name isn’t Terri)

Win.

from a trailer park outside Bel Air, Maryland.

I’m betting Frederick (aka Fredneck) or possibly Dundalk

to post links other than the PayPal link that follows every single post where she begs her readers to feed her. (Seriously.)

Oh well, I’ve got some shit sandwiches I never finished while her new friends were running the show.

plus I have had bitter experiences at the hands of liberal fascists when I tried to get them to observe their stated principles

Liberals are mean so I took up with Repubs. They’re bound to be much nicer!

Comedy Gold!

Too bad her audience hasn’t put the puzzle together, consisting of, author of “How to Get Money for Anything — Fast!” and “um I’m a lesbian who became a fiscal conservative at the very moment the entire fiscal conservative world collapsed upon itself, give me some money, fast.”

Meanwhile, in today’s PENIS news….

I once heard a lesbian call into Stephanie Miller and say she and her partner had registered as Repubs because they were worried about Obama’s “generational debt” and the tax consequences. I love how people will sell their dignity and civil rights for the possibility of an extra $50/paycheck. (Until they get laid off because tax cuts ruined the economy.)

Fucking Black-Liberation Climate-Change Theologians!

BTW: where do y’all get one of those non-sequitur warning horns? I’d carry one around constantly.

Check TPM for some Sanford funny.

http://tpmmuckraker.talkingpointsmemo.com/2009/07/great_call_in_emails_to_sanfords_office_right-wing.php?ref=fpblg

As a 27 year old lesbian, Sarah Palin isn’t that hot.

I would think she’d be quite fetching as a 27-year-old lesbian. Certainly more so than as a 45-year-old hetero wackjob.

As for Cynthia, I’m reminded of John Cusack in The Sure Thing:

“How would you like to have a sexual encounter so intense it could conceivably change your political views?”

Who wants to bet that Ms. Yockey (such a shame her first name isn’t Terri)

So let it be written, so let it be done!

You want cole slaw with your rib eye or potato salad?

I love how people will sell their dignity and civil rights for the possibility of an extra $50/paycheck

There’s a name for a person like that… something beginning with “pr”… hmmmmmm…

RB broke the blog.

Probably he’s being paid off by Sanford and Sons.

45-year-old hetero wackjob.

A wackjob is just about the only sexual act that the republicans haven’t publicized recently.

Also.

Sotomayor’s story was not nearly the “girl from the projects” triumph over adversity and racism that it has been portrayed to be.

Aaaaand? What the hell does this have to do with her suitability as a Supreme Court judge? Are idiots going to start claiming “we know NOTHING about her!” and demanding the adamantium hyperlocked valut copy of HER birth certificate as well, lest she be hiding her nativity as an illegal immigrant from Planet Zeiss?

Shorter life-story: Sarah Palin… ooohhh… hummina, hummina, scha…wing.

Yes, Sarah, naked but for her panties, whipping me……. I wanna be a conservative, oh, hit me again…..

To be fair, it looks to me like she’s saying the total cost of the meal would be $11.95 if you add the salad to the sandwich and cafe latte… not that that makes her any less ridiculous.

Sarah, naked but for her panties, whipping me

You’re going to refund me the cost of the wire brush & Comet(tm) I need to get that picture out of my brain, you know.

Somewhat off-topic, but is anyone clear on why wingnuts hate Nancy Pelosi so much? She’s hardly been a stalwart fighter for liberal principles, but from the way she gets described, you’d think she’s simultaneously a mouthbreathing imbecile and a cunning, rapacious Bitch-Queen from the depths of Hell.

I mean, they hate anyone with a (D) after their name, but they hate Pelosi more than they hate Ted Kennedy. And he killed that poor woman, etc.

lobbey said,
Pere Ubu said,

I’ve always figured she breaks out the thigh-high boots and one of those creepy leather German domme hats when she and Todd go off on a secluded snowmachine trip.

You know, Yockey isn’t a terribly common name… the only other person I’ve heard by that name and that spelling is Francis Yockey, who was one of the most prominent American fascists of the mid-20th century… wonder if she’s related.

Though I Godwin, I Godwin relevantly…

Somewhat off-topic, but is anyone clear on why wingnuts hate Nancy Pelosi so much?

A commenter at Pajamas was recently complaining about cap-and-trade, insisting that Pelosi should do something about the “300 million tons of pollution” discharged into the Pacific Ocean from San Francisco’s storm sewers first.

Djur:

I think the fact that she’s a liberal woman in a major position of power explains everything, don’t you? I mean, they never dared give Tip O’Neill this kind of crap.

Never teach the Wu Tang Style!

Aaaaand? What the hell does this have to do with her suitability as a Supreme Court judge?

What play book have you been reading from? Everyone knows that:

When a Democratic President nominates someone to the Supreme Court, the nomination process is actually a referendum on all liberal policies of the last century. As such, said nominee must successfully instantiate all liberal concepts; any faliure to do so is acutally proof of the failure of liberal policies in “the real world.”

When Republican Presidents nominate someone to the Supreme Court, that person merely has to be a conservative with a pulse and some vague background in jurisprudence, and if the nominee is anything other than a white male then the nominating President is a brilliant visionary–natch.

Somewhat off-topic, but is anyone clear on why wingnuts hate Nancy Pelosi so much? She’s hardly been a stalwart fighter for liberal principles…

The same didn’t stop them from hating Bill Clinton.

Wingnut masters are always working the Overton window, and the wingnuts always obey their masters.

If Arlen Specter manages to win the Democratic primary somehow (and I hope he does not), expect the wingnuts to claim that Senator Specter is the leftiest lefty in leftytown.

As such, said nominee must successfully instantiate all liberal concepts

No offense, but “rags to riches” is pretty much a conservative trope. Why this should or shouldn’t apply to SotonmayOR is my question.

Or would the lack of a “rags” part prove that she had no link to Teh Street and is therefore a limousine liberal and doesn’t care about the boyz n grrlz in da ‘hood or whatever tortured wingnut-gangsta speak they come up with?

Sounds like a PUMA or a fake democrat. Not that there is a difference!

“…that person merely has to be a conservative with a pulse…”
It’s true. That’s why I only got halfway there. Bleah, I vant the blood of the innocent! Also.

No offense, but “rags to riches” is pretty much a conservative trope.

Not when she’s the beneficiary of such famous liberal fascism as affirmative action. Remember all the noise they were making about how she got into college as a “quota admission”?

I think Pere Ubu that you’re letting too much causation cloud your thinking, free your mind and the conservative rant-logic will follow.

They haven’t come up with a response to how she also graduated summa cum laude; if asked, they would probably say it was “affirmative action summa cum laude” and hope like hell no one expected them to define that.

This was a beautiful post. I had no idea this person existed. She is exquisite.

Thank you, Tintin. I laughed so hard I got dizzy and fell over, but it was wonderful!

Holy cow. I thought *I* was lazy and ill-informed. At least I do cute Photoshops.

But…but…MIGUEL ESTRADA!!!!

they would probably say it was “affirmative action summa cum laude”

Hah! Latin is for elitists. Also.

Yes, Sarah, naked but for her panties, whipping me……. I wanna be a conservative

I threw up in my mouth, a little.

Why does it matter that Yockey’s imaginary friend is “much hotter” than Sonia Sotomayor? Has anyone been holding Ms. Sotomayor up as a paragon of physical attractiveness? Is it even remotely relevant to her nomination?

Or is Yockey just trying to prove her lesbian and wingnut boner fides at the same time? She should pack in her blog and move to Ace of Spades.

“affirmative action summa cum laude” and hope like hell no one expected them to define that.

Obviously, every single professor and instructor who graded her was either a com-symp pinko and/or intimidated by political correctness and therefore gave her good grades regardless of her performance. This is why Princeton has a reputation as a party school.

They haven’t come up with a response to how she also graduated summa cum laude

She misheard. She was graduated summa cum latte.

This is why Princeton has a reputation as a party school.

Sideshow Bob: “Oh come, now. You wanted to be Krusty’s sidekick since you were five! What about the buffoon lessons? The four years at clown college?”
Cecil: “I’ll thank you not to refer to Princeton that way.”

I am a 55-year-old lesbian and over the course of the presidential campaign in 2008, my political views transformed from those of a lifelong liberal, Democrat and global warming believer to those of a fiscal conservative who rejects theories of anthropogenic climate change because we are so totally NOT more influential on the climate than the sun, sunspots, the ocean and ocean currents.

Worst. Penthouse. Letter. Ever.

Galactic Dustbim

????

Worst. Penthouse. Letter. Ever.

FTW.

Everybody knows that Harvard is clown college.

Princeton is Buffoon U.

my political views transformed from those of a lifelong liberal, Democrat and global warming believer to those of a fiscal conservative who rejects theories of anthropogenic climate change because we are so totally NOT more influential on the climate than the sun, sunspots, the ocean and ocean currents.

I didn’t notice it before, but this has some sort of structural resemblance to the conversions the great Bérubé documented in his classic post.

I threw up in my mouth, a little.

To quote Crow T. Robot, if I run out of vomit can I borrow some of yours?

To quote Crow T. Robot, if I run out of vomit can I borrow some of yours?

There’s plenty to go around on this one…

The book she’s trying to sell was co-authored by Joe Vitale, who is the proud holder of a doctorate in metaphysical science from the University of Metaphysics.

You gotta admit, a doctorate from the University of Metaphysics would look pretty fucking impressive on a resume, especially if you also had graduate degrees from the Ectoplasmic Institute and the Academy for Advanced Study of Cerebral Astral Subharmonics.

especially if you also had graduate degrees from the Ectoplasmic Institute and the Academy for Advanced Study of Cerebral Astral Subharmonics.

Meh, quit pussy-footing around and just go for the Doctorate in Eldritch Horrors from Miskatonic University.

But I hear defending your thesis is a real nightmare.

oops

Sometimes I like to walking along the galactic dustberm near my house.

But I hear defending your thesis is a real nightmare.

Not as hard as at Cthuhulu State.

Blowjob, blowjob BLOWJOB!!

There. Now I’ll never get on MSNBC.

BLOWjOB is the BUTTOCKS.

As a pussy artsy liberal type, all I hold is a Music Theory bachelor’s from the Erich Zann Institute. (GOOOOO Things on the Doorstep!)

This is very confusing. Because negroes cause sunspots, she wants to toss salads? Help me out here.

Not as hard as at Cthuhulu State

Yeah, but that department is all built around like one guy.

Still the best license plate evah.

Websense thinks Flickr is a “Marketing Site”.

W. T. F.?

Websense thinks Flickr is a “Marketing Site”.

Trying to protect you from Cthulhoid marketing… ?

How to Get Lots of Money for Anything–Fast:

1) Wait till economy is shit and everyone wants to make extra money
2) Write and sell try to sell a book claiming to tell them how to make easy money
3) Profit!

Websense thinks Flickr is a “Marketing Site”.

Really? I get “Personal and Social Site”.

Pity, because I have a great PENIS picture for PeeJ on my stream.

1) Wait till economy is shit and everyone wants to make extra money
2) Write and try to sell a book claiming to tell them how to make easy money
3) Profit!

It certainly moves the project forward significantly if your prospective audience are, you know, gullible schmucks.

After all, these are the same people who buy the colloidal silver and work-at-home scams from the commercials on the Pigman’s and Glenn Blecch’s shows.

Okay, call me an unsympathetic shit

You’re an unsympathetic shit.

(That’s why we love you.)

Holy shit, talk about your subtext; “Cuban Diva BFF” wouldn’t fuck her with a ten-foot-pole tipped with a Hitachi Magic Wand, so Cindy Yockey is trying to suck up to her to see if she can at least get a little hand-jive action in a dark booth at Henrietta Hudson’s. Too bad she’s the poster child for Lesbian Bed Death–have you ever seen anyone who was deliberately trying to look like Julia Sweeney’s Pat IRL more than this dyke?

I’ll give her this much: she did have the smarts to hang out with people (second link in the post) who make her look like Rachel Maddow in black leather***; witness this fine fellow with his soul patch, aka The Pussy Tickler In Eternal Search Of One. Not that that will help her hook up with Cuban Diva BFF, who is out hunting for a relatively young but still big-toothed Kennedy gal to help her with a covert Bay of Pigs invasion, if you catch–OK, I’ll stop now.

*Subaru Owner’s Club.

**Pardon the expression.

***DON’T YOU JUDGE ME

You guys are just begging for a Feministing! or Jezebel smackdown, aren’t you?!

Beware.

The last paragraph of her latest post:

Of the four candidates on the Democratic and Republican tickets, Gov. Palin had the best qualifications AND grasp of the measure necessary to ensure both economic prosperity and peace of ALL four candidates. We would be MUCH better off if she were president RIGHT NOW than we ever will be with Barack Obama.

This raises a couple of interesting points:

1) Is there only one measure necessary to ensure economic prosperity and peace? What is it? No fair holding out.

2) Did Palin really know how to “ensure both economic prosperity and peace of ALL four candidates”? How would that work? The winners split their salaries with the losers?

3) What is this woman on?

Is she newly conservative, or newly Lesbian? Did her traumatic experience of reading about solar flares and sunspots ‘turn’ her? Or was it Hillary? Mrs. Clinton has a lot to explain!

Bitter and PUMA will forever be an unattractive combination.

Hey, leave me out of this!

The more I look at this woman’s site the more confused I am.
http://www.aconservativelesbian.com/2009/02/28/gay-marriage/
http://www.aconservativelesbian.com/2009/04/04/now-its-safe-for-me-to-move-to-iowa/

Apparently she lived for twenty years with a female life partner who was disabled with MS. She carefully chose what state and county they lived in to be sure that the medical power of attorney her partner gave her would be respected. She rejoiced when same sex marriage became legal in Iowa, her state of birth, because now gay couples could have the equal rights they deserve. She lays out excellent arguments for gay marriage here.

It appears that she has never had much money, so it’s impossible for me to see how her partner’s (and her own) medical care wasn’t paid for by some government program.

After posting a pro-gay marriage piece on PJ media, and getting many cruel, negative replies, as well as some supportive ones, this is what she takes away:

Republicans now are the party of tolerance and equality.

She’s right about one thing though. The Obama administration should be a LOT more assertive in removing federal barriers to gay marriage. The country is ready.

1) Is there only one measure necessary to ensure economic prosperity and peace? What is it? No fair holding out.

“Drill, baby, drill”!

But I don’t think Yockey means oil.

You guys are just begging for a Feministing! or Jezebel smackdown, aren’t you?!

Oh please…as if. Humorless feminists (I am the latter, though not the former) are no match for the denizens of this site. We would slay them with POOP, PENIS, and TEH BUTTOCKS in short order.

On the other hand, if the sensitive whiners from Shakesville were to show up, they’d suck so much oxygen out of the room that we’d probably all find it much more pleasant to just leave and wait for them to go away.

A wackjob is just about the only sexual act that the republicans haven’t publicized recently.

Umm…….you know that classified program that Cheney told the CIA not to reveal to Congress? Well……..

On the Left, from the Democrats and liberals, I would get a whole lot of, “We support you, but not in any practical way, because our black and Latin constituencies hate you and want you dead and will leave us if we do anything in support of your equality.”

Whereas the whites of the Republican party love them some homosexuals and only wish the GOP would do more to protect their rights.

Whereas the whites of the Republican party love them some homosexuals

Long as the love stays where it should: in an airport men’s room.

Pity, because I have a great PENIS picture for PeeJ on my stream.

I find the near apposition of the words PENIS and my stream slightly disturbing.

On the Left, from the Democrats and liberals, I would get a whole lot of, “We support you, but not in any practical way, because our black and Latin constituencies hate you and want you dead and will leave us if we do anything in support of your equality.”

My, isn’t that telling? Someone has anger issues.

tbati,

It’s not as if someone is being lookist or fatist or advocating that people walk through a mall without stopping at the Hot Sams and Orange Julius or anything. And, there wasn’t even one giant sammich in this post.

Jennifer:

If the Shakers come over, I’ll shut up faster than a girl in Algebra class. (do I have to explain?)

our black and Latin constituencies hate you and want you dead

Uh?

Being pasty-white myself I don’t pay a lot of attention to black & Latin media… but are they actually full of the hate towards white lesbians?

Oh, why am I asking – I’m sure they’re not and this is yet another product pulled wholesale out of Ms. Yockey’s sphincter like some anal Athena sprung from the colon of Zeus.

I think the fact that she’s a liberal woman in a major position of prestige, personal profit, and potential, unused, power explains everything, don’t you? [highlighted portions my own insertion]

Fixed it for you.

Also, re the Lesbopublican’s post–Wow. She knows a rightwing Cuban. What are the odds.

I find the near apposition of the words PENIS and my stream slightly disturbing.

To periphrase the Beatles, golden showers fill your eyes…

we are so totally NOT more influential on the climate than the sun, sunspots, the ocean and ocean currents.

And because the ocean is so much bigger than me, there is no way I could drown if I tie cinderblogs to my feet and jump off a dock at high tide.

Pere Ubu said,

It certainly moves the project forward significantly if your prospective audience are, you know, gullible schmucks.

After all, these are the same people who buy the colloidal silver and work-at-home scams from the commercials on the Pigman’s and Glenn Blecch’s shows.

And there’s nothing like a gullible schmuck to flog your book for you.

I saw a story somewhere (but I’m too tired to look it up) of a guy whose skin turned blue from all the colloidal silver he was ingesting.

I saw a story somewhere (but I’m too tired to look it up) of a guy whose skin turned blue from all the colloidal silver he was ingesting.

Ah, the story of Paul Karason…

I saw a story somewhere (but I’m too tired to look it up) of a guy whose skin turned blue from all the colloidal silver he was ingesting.

Vy-lola.

If the Shakers come over, I’ll shut up faster than a girl in Algebra class. (do I have to explain?)

Heh. I was one of those girls who never did shut up in Algebra class (or Geometry, Trigonometry (thanks Palin, now we have to spell it out), or Calculus). Maybe this is just another example of what a hateful anti-feminist I really am, but I always figured that girls who sat through math class with their mouths shut were the ones who weren’t all that good at math.

I’m such a condescending bitch – but my observation is that high-IQ females typically are not shrinking violets, and if I had to hazard a guess, a lot of the female-on-female infighting over this type of stuff results from the fact that women who are really on the upper end of the smarts curve simply have a very hard time understanding why any of this stuff would be hard or a struggle for anyone else. That observation I’m pretty sure would also hold true for men who are really smart – I think it’s every bit as hard for a really smart person to imagine what it would be like to be less intelligent or empathize with someone who lacks their intellectual prowess as it is for a dumb person to understand WTF a genius is talking about.

Speaking of riling up teh Shakers…

Heh, Jennifer said “the female-on-female infighting”. Heh, heh.

Dragon-King – well, I didn’t want to say catfight, because that would really bring them out of the woodwork…

I’m such a condescending bitch

You make this sound like a bad thing. I’m paying alimony to at least two of you.

Off topic:

The fact is, Gary Ruppert’s Twitter account has apparently gone bye-bye

YOU LIE-BRAL COMMUNISTS AND YOUR BLACK MESSIAH ARE DESTROYING AMERICA WITH YOUR GAY RAINBOWS!!!!1!!

One hundred whole fucking hours. Why that’s way more time than it would take to get a PhD. I’d be petrified of taking on this highly-educated conservative if I were you.

Um … Sadly, No! I’m sure I spent way more than 100 hours mindlessly surfing the web and reading stuff on blogs during the course of my Ph.D. work. What else are you going to do when you have a 5 minute calculation running? It’s not enough time to work on another project or even get a coffee, but you can’t continue what you’re doing until you have the results and hence know exactly what weighting parameter you need to tweak to rerun the calculation. And those 5 minutes here and 5 minutes there sure do add up …

(he says while running a calculation and surfing the ‘nets).

Jennifer said,

Humorless feminists (I am the latter, though not the former)…

Oh, I can tell. Because this:

…if the sensitive whiners from Shakesville were to show up, they’d suck so much oxygen out of the room that we’d probably all find it much more pleasant to just leave and wait for them to go away.

reeks of sisterhood, is not a gratuitous, OT slam at all, and is a laff riot besides! So, total win there

Speaking of win,.

dbati said:

If the Shakers come over, I’ll shut up faster than a girl in Algebra class. (do I have to explain?)

Oh, snap.

Well, you got me. I’m a (part-time, mostly lurker) Shaker, so I write letters:

Dear Jennifer and dbati:

Some Shakers are obviously here all the time. Sometimes we even read the comments, although that is getting more and more tedious and often not worth the time it takes.

Also: You are both cordially invited to bite me. Because on this topic, you are highly unfunny. And I’m here for the lulz.

Very truly yours,

GW

That was the moment I accepted fiscal conservatism as my personal lord and savior.

And today’s “We’ve never met an expensive war we didn’t like” GOP is fiscally conservative how?

And the “we better be careful that we only spend what is absolutely needed on this here stimulus package” are fiscally reckless how?

Like I wuz sayin’.

Moving on…best comment from Rugged’s youtube link: Gay people obviously dip their dicks and pussies into? the reservoirs.

Seriously, I can’t wait for this woman to cotton onto the Care Bears Conspiracy.

You know that thing I was sayin’ upthread about how smart people have a really hard time imagining what it would be like to be not-so-smart? That woman from the youtube link is Exhibit A.

GW,

Oh, I can tell.

Yes, you do seem to be somewhat of an expert on the subject. And also, you said “You are both cordially invited to bite me”. Heh, heh. Bow-chicka-wow-Wow.

Okay, I haven’t read this whole thread yet, or even at all, but I have to chime in here and say that

is the funniest thing I’ve read all day, lookism be damned.

Certainly not hot enough to change my political views.

I’m thinking her political views were not that strong to begin with.

Also, and such as, shouldn’t she be praying to baby jeebus to be catching teh straight© more than the conservative?

Bow-chicka-wow-Wow.

Humorless feminism: no match for Teh Snark.

Then again, neither is anything else.

(he says while running a calculation and surfing the ‘nets).

Brother!

http://www.aconservativelesbian.com/2009/04/04/now-its-safe-for-me-to-move-to-iowa/

Oops, I missed the part about how she’s been a yogic flyer since 1978. I guess by now she can zip all around the room in the lotus position.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/TM-Sidhi_program
Just wow.

I thought Shakers went extinct because of a fundamental flaw in their theology.

And I’m here for the lulz.

Sadly, No! is pretty much a BYOL endeavor.

Speaking of expensive salads:
WTF, don’t even gots croutons!

Also: You are both cordially invited to bite me. Because on this topic, you are highly unfunny.

Uh oh. You guys must have said something TRIGGERING.

yogic flyer

Wasn’t he the goaltender in the 1980 Stanley Cup finals?

Oops, I missed the part about how she’s been a yogic flyer since 1978. I guess by now she can zip all around the room in the lotus position.

Transcendental Meditation™ is not “yoga.”

Anyway, I read once that the whole TM™ “levitation” thing consists of learning to hop like a frog while in the lotus position, and going for more “hang time.”

“Really, I stayed up longer that time! I could feel it! Yes! Take some more of my money…!”

I thought Shakers went extinct because of a fundamental flaw in their theology.

They died of starvation due to destitution when their overpriced, crappy furniture went out of style.

Maybe out as a lez but still in the closet about that massive Hillary crush. Gotta put that disappointment somewhere. Really. Lifelong Dem – where do ya think she stood during the primaries?

Does she know PUMAs already have a home at NoQuarter?

They died of starvation due to destitution when their overpriced, crappy furniture went out of style.

Actually, it was a genocide by IKEA.

Humorless feminism: no match for Teh Snark.

Anything that ends in -ism is inherently humorless, except for the one thing.

Sadly, No! is pretty much a BYOL endeavor.

I mean, the comments thread is, anyway.

No offense to the hardworking folks who brave the wingnuts to bring us the original posts.

…except for the one thing.

Does it start with “j”?

“Really, I stayed up longer that time! I could feel it! Yes! Take some more of my money…!”

OK, that gives me an idea for a scam plan to make money.

But one of those old fun house floors with the airjets in them, and when some idiot leaps up, silently pull a trigger that releases compressed air as they hit the apex, thus making it feel as if they are hanging a bit longer each time.

Anyway, I read once that the whole TM™ “levitation” thing consists of learning to hop like a frog while in the lotus position, and going for more “hang time.”

I dunno if it’s on the interducts but I know there exists video of people hopping around with their legs in pretzels. Hysterically funny.

genocide by IKEA.

IKEAcide

Sadly, No! is pretty much a BYOL endeavor.

Bring Your Own Lesbians?

 Joe Max said,
Uh oh. You guys must have said something TRIGGERING.

Yeah, that’s way over the line.

Anyway, I read once that the whole TM™ “levitation” thing consists of learning to hop like a frog while in the lotus position, and going for more “hang time.”

An old “60 Minutes” segment debunking TM had college gymnasts doing that. It was pretty damn funny.

Ok, laugh about the flying yogis all you like…but my mom’s family is still in Fairfield, Iowa, home of Maharishi International University. Just imagine how the simple farm-folk of rural Iowa took to a bunch of tofu-eaters moving into town and building domes on their campus for “flying”. Talk about your clash of cultures. The “mews”, as the local folk call them, are known around town for showing up to shop barefooted or sockless in sandals in mid-winter when the temps are below zero.

“Cuban Diva BFF” is seriously the dumbest fucking name I’ve ever heard bestowed on a (probably imaginary) person, and that’s including Cigarskunk and “Purple Avenger.”

I just had the briefest image in my head involving Cynthia Yockey, Katherine Jean Lopez and Jonah Goldberg, and now I’ll have to blow my brains out.

Thanks a lot, Sadly, No! I had a good day going until just then.

You know how I’m always begging you guys to post more pictures of the wingnuts? I take it back.

Well, I guess you all showed me what Teh Funny really is! All this time, I thought it was Buttocks. Or Penis. And it was Humorless Feminists, all along. Boy, do I feel stupid now. You know, Humorless Feminists takes way longer to type than Penis.

That must have been some bad spanking you lot took at Shakesville for whatever dumbfuck thing you said if you’re still sneering at them about it.

WTF did you say, anyway? Never mind, I don’t really want to know. I’m sure it was tremendously witty.

I shall go back to Lurking Moar.

It’s at times like this that I really miss Bruce the most.

I’m guessing that Cuban Diva BFF is the name of the little purple number that Cynthia keeps in her bedside table which requires batteries.

What?

is “purple Avenger ” the guy or his PENIS?

Ok, laugh about the flying yogis all you like…but my mom’s family is still in Fairfield, Iowa, home of Maharishi International University.

There was a great big poster in one of the buildings that I coveted showing all the fundamental forces of nature, including brainwaves or some such nonsense.

The wiki article says that only the first stage has ever been observed by non-yogis. The first stage is, of course, the hopping with folded legs stage. The next stage is floating and the final stage is flying.

But after thirty years of practice I’m sure Yokey has mastered all stages.

Maybe they call it “yogic flying” after its inventor, Maharishi Mahesh Yogi. I’d call it a gold mine.

Calm down, Mary.

People read – and comment at – different blogs for different reasons. If Sadly,No! doesn’t fulfill your RDA of outrage for whatever different topic or issue, you know there are other places to go for that. That’s not what this blog is about, and I think I probably speak for most of the folks here when I say that it’s not what we want it to be about. Instead of raging at us about not being sufficiently in line with the majority of Shakesville commenters you could always, you know, go over to Shakesville to fulfill that need. I don’t think it’s something we are particularly interested in here.

I believe the offense started with someone saying “Condescension is a poor way to make yourself welcome”

GW, some people here just have a bug up their ass about the slightest hint of criticism. It isn’t everyone.

I wouldn’t comment at Shakesville or Alas, A Blog because they have community standards I’m unlikely to consistently meet. As a result, I choose not to comment there regularly, and if I did, I’d try to be respectful.

Similarly, people who expect a “safe space” at, say, Pandagon are misguided. And people who are offended or hurt by the general tenor of conversation at teh Sadly should choose to steer clear. That’s one of the great things about the Internet — you get to choose who you associate with and where.

And to everyone who decided to snark at GW like she was some sort of drive-by troll: show some fucking respect.

Of course, I eat brains, so what do I know?

That’s not what this blog is about, and I think I probably speak for most of the folks here when I say that it’s not what we want it to be about.

Speaking only for myself, I’d like it to be fun. Gentlewoman’s been a fine contributor here for a very long time and I don’t much see the point of ragging on her for whatever you feel outraged by.

hey the other day, someone called me Captain Obvious in a duh-mobile. I called him Perfessor, and everybody moved on.

It’s kind of rough and tumble around here. Caused by the mix of insane trolls, clueless trolls, concern trolls, fake trolls, and regulars. Sometimes it takes a couple of comments to identify friend or foe.

Gentlewoman’s been a fine contributor here for a very long time

….however, it makes me wonder why I’M tolerated….

….however, it makes me wonder why I’M tolerated….

Name change, man. I’ll get there soon.

I overheard a lawyer joke once and my butt still hurts. Self-identifying as a lawyer shouldn’t expose me to that kind of shit.

IRIS!

WE FINALLY FOUND IRIS!

RB – I didn’t rag on Gentlewoman. I ragged on Shakesville. And you know, that’s ok for me to do – it’s not like I’m going over there and ragging on them, which would make me a troll.

But this ain’t Shakesville – this blog is not dedicated to political correctness and feminism. And I think if you look back upthread, you’ll see the personal ragging came from Gentlewoman before it came from anyone else, and it never came from me. I was just trying to point out that she’s not going to find the same type of commentary here that she does at Shakesville, which in no way was a suggestion for her to leave and never come back, but just to point out the obvious: this ain’t Shakesville, and most of us don’t want it to be Shakesville. If she likes Shakesville, that’s all fine and good and she should continue to enjoy it and also continue to enjoy Sadly, No! to whatever extent she can without expecting it to be another Shakesville.

That is all.

POOP.

Also.

I didn’t rag on Gentlewoman. I ragged on Shakesville.

By saying you were smarter than alla them feminists over there. It might be a weakness on the part of Gentlewoman to rise to that bait, but hey, I’ve trolled.

this blog is not dedicated to political correctness and feminism.

I figured there was some of the latter here, and I haven’t seen many Michelle-Obama-is-a-gorilla jokes, but perhaps I haven’t been reading closely enough.

hey the other day, someone called me Captain Obvious in a duh-mobile. I called him Perfessor, and everybody moved on.

That would be me. And we both jumped into the duh-mobile and moved on. Exactly.

Oh, Jennifer. I’m perfectly calm, dearie. I am not, however, Mary. Mary’s a lot nicer than I am.

I like Sadly, No! a lot. It’s why I’ve been coming here for years. I do read Shakesville regularly, also. I don’t agree with them on everything, just as I don’t agree with the Sadlynaughts about everything, but I find value there as well as here.

I suppose what I’ve been avoiding saying because I didn’t want to hurt your little fee-fees, is that I just didn’t think your joke was funny. It was maybe almost funny the first dozen or so times you used it, but now…not so much.

I know you’d rather pretend to think that that I’m raging about something or other than that you weren’t being all that funny because that is, after all, why we’re here, and I’m sure you’d much rather be thought a bitch than a bore, but I just think you need a new schtick. You know, something fresh. Something funny.

And don’t worry so, Sadlynaught people! Y’all don’t piss me off enough to make me leave. I made it through the Patterico battles, the various Godlstein sorties, the annieangel episodes, etc., and I expect I’ll live through my disappointment in you. Hard to believe that I outstayed, mikey, isn’t it? Thanks for your concern, though!

The duh-mobile beats the ragewagon hands down! Though I find myself firing up the latter more often than is healthy…

RB, I gotta side with Jennifer on this one. GW responded to the “humorless feminists”, which may or may not be a trigger, but as J points out, this place is a bit more grungy than Shakesville. and hey, I LIKE shakesville, lots of good brainz over there.

It should go without saying that not all feminists are humorless, and not all Shakers are humorless.

I would like to think that I can be considered a feminist, and as my comments here will bear out, I am pretty lacking in humor. So I mock trolls and get my Insufferable Music Snob on. Hey, it may not be a safe space, but it’s pretty accepting.

But eat ONE brain, and everybody wants to pull out the shotguns and get all Half-Life (yes I am looking at N_B ONE UNDERSCORE!!)

I call bullshit, if no one else has yet.

This person is either a typically lame attempt by a winger to invent another “lie-bruhl convert” or an actual intelligent person playing the wingers for suckers. No reason we shouldn’t make a quick buck or two off the idjits is there?

I’m surprised there aren’t more out there setting the pathetic dead-enders up to be publicly punk’d. (and making some money off ’em, if possible, in the meantime)

tbati, one of my friends recommends trying the Inarticulate Rage. I imagine the Ragewagon is a lot more demanding.

RB – You’re welcome to cut and paste where I even hinted at saying I was “smarter than alla them feminists over there.”

I slammed the general tenor of the blog – what to me comes off as over-sensitivity. That’s why I don’t go there – after checking it out a few times, I found the endless parsing and dissection of each and every story or comment tedious and exhausting. Not dumb, just boring. But you know what? For some folks that’s their cuppa tea, and more power to them. That’s no reason for me to pretend that I don’t find it tedious, nor is it any reason for me to not say so somewhere else.

While you’re at it, you might go back and review the comments above and see how far afield the conversation had moved from the “offending statements” when GW popped back up to bring it right back into focus again. Up until that point, I didn’t bother to respond. But when she came back AGAIN, and AGAIN with the “you all should be ashamed of yourselves for (not liking Shakesville? not agreeing with Shakesville’s agenda? not observing the same rules of discourse they use at Shakesville? whatever it was),” I responded, and not in a way that was “ragging” on her, but just by pointing out the obvious – this ain’t Shakesville.

Sorry if I’ve offended your sensibilities as well by not apologizing for saying what I think or want to say. That’s why I come here and not Shakesville.

My apologies for snittage.

And in a totally non-snarky way, thank you for your support, Sadlynaughts who remember me. Remember me without loathing, I mean. Well, without much loathing. Without much public, on the record loathing, anyway. Thank you.

Damn, Gentlewoman, don’t let it be known that anybody here displayed CONCERN.

What would the trolls think?

…umm, and if that was sarcasm, sorry. I’m overworked, underpaid, and not drunk enough yet.

Inarticulate Rage sounds ecxe..um…ter…alw… AGGGGHHHHHH!

I must try it sometime.

Y’all don’t piss me off enough to make me leave.

…okay, realizing that I am a bad bad person, this reads as a challenge.

Kidding! Kidding!!

back to the condyke, I commented there when she was calling for letterman to be fired for offending her crush. She cant see that her little group of wingnuts are neva going to get a rich media figure sacked BUT NOW she has the cuban pretend friend it could all change! MWAA

BUTTOCKS

Oh please…as if. Humorless feminists (I am the latter, though not the former) are no match for the denizens of this site. We would slay them with POOP, PENIS, and TEH BUTTOCKS in short order.

On the other hand, if the sensitive whiners from Shakesville were to show up, they’d suck so much oxygen out of the room that we’d probably all find it much more pleasant to just leave and wait for them to go away.

This is right on. But GW is good people. Sigh.

I wouldn’t comment at Shakesville or Alas, A Blog because they have community standards I’m unlikely to consistently meet.

Me too, but with MOAR spittle. I *hate* their standards; they are cartoon people (no pun) to me, so over-invested, so afraid of an opposing argument, and such aesthetic Stalinists that they don’t even seem real.

Not to say that everyone there is that way, but those communities in aggregate are definitely that way.

Similarly, people who expect a “safe space” at, say, Pandagon are misguided.

I saw and read that thread… horrified.

Christians have the cross; Randroids have the dollar sign; I have the Giant Sammich as a “fuck you” symbol not because of a personal grudge or because of even the Daffy posts in which the Sammich became famous but because I absolutely detest the mentality behind such concepts “safe zones” and “triggering”, as well as the bizarre need, in such a fucked-up world, to devote so much energy deconstructing and then demonizing art which doesn’t conform to one’s identity politics, not to mention the complete moral bankruptcy in the insistence that one’s feely-feelings are equally or even more important than, say, the fact that thousands of people are being blown up by one’s country’s army.

Our standards here are infinitely better: they can come over here and tell me I’m an asshole without getting banned, because people here aren’t so gutless that we’re afraid of *words.*

GW popped back up to bring it right back into focus again.

I know, gone for a few months, and now she’s like a fucking zombie troll, amirite?

Focus totally sucks, anyway. Glittering generalities are obviously the way to go. I will make a note of that, for future disagreements with fellow (but way cooler and funnier) feminists.

But when she came back AGAIN, and AGAIN with the “you all should be ashamed of yourselves for (not liking Shakesville? not agreeing with Shakesville’s agenda? not observing the same rules of discourse they use at Shakesville? whatever it was)

A lot of people would have put a quote here, showing where I said that, but a lot of people are WEAK.

Shakeville is humorless to the point of being a self-parody of Angry Feminism, at least the times I have tried to comment. I find that particular strain of self-Importance mixed with the need to be particularly tedious.

So I am here.

GW and Jennifer have both been around here for a while.

Can’t we all just get along?

Erm.

…mixed with the need to be angry…

How can someone be “from” Shakesville?

I absolutely detest the mentality behind such concepts “safe zones” and “triggering”, as well as the bizarre need, in such a fucked-up world, to devote so much energy deconstructing and then demonizing art which doesn’t conform to one’s identity politics, not to mention the complete moral bankruptcy in the insistence that one’s feely-feelings are equally or even more important than, say, the fact that thousands of people are being blown up by one’s country’s army.

FTW.

Years ago I saw a Feminist Joke Book called “Titters”. It was pretty good, especially their parody of the Q&A directions that used to come with tampons. “Just don’t wear white” heh heh. Always makes me smile.

I think it’s every bit as hard for a really smart person to imagine what it would be like to be less intelligent or empathize with someone who lacks their intellectual prowess

Story of my life. Surrounded by dimbulbs, & I just don’t get them.

Can’t we all just get along?

Apparently not, when we dont’t conform to the standards of some other place that some of us happen to like.

Shorter HTML: “Shakesville is evil because some people there said mean things about me. Oh, and they’re so sensitive!”

Would you prefer that people with triggering issues have nowhere to read and discuss issues online? The entire point of a safe space is to permit you (and me) to say whatever the fuck we like without worrying about these issues. I can tell you and Jennifer to fuck yourselves at the same time with a bifurcated obelisk without worrying about someone with a scarring obelisk-related incident in their past.

Just because you or I don’t experience triggers like victims of sexual assault do doesn’t mean that we get to discount or trivialize them. And the fact that you’re complaining about the very *existence of the concept* on your own blog, where nobody expects you to post trigger alerts or make anything a fucking safe space, because they already exist, speaks poorly of you.

The other day, I was reading a post on Alas, A Blog where someone referred to something as “lame.” They were upbraided for this (Alas is, among other things, a disability rights blog) and apologized. I thought that was pretty lame, so I don’t post there. But I also don’t interminably whinge about it on other blogs, either.

Now can we please get back to laughing at “Cuban Diva BFF”? Because that’s pretty fucking hilarious.

That’s right. None of you fuckers live up to the standards of MY blog, and I detest you all for it.

I would eat all of your brains, if I could find you. DAMN this internet!!

except for Tintin. I make his brains into pate. Cuz he’s French, or a Fag, or Both.

Last go ’round of a “cunt” war I remembered I owned this.

Joe-Bob Briggs: “Kung-Fu, Monkey-Fu, Midget-Fu and Bimbo-Fu! all in one movie!

My sister was really angry that I laughed at that. “You know what my sister is like?” she say to her friends “She *likes* Joe-Bob Briggs. She insisted he was not writing satire, that he was serious. Just like “The Onion”.

But djur, isn’t it within our rights to sit on this blog and say what we think without having to worry about other people’s sensitivities?

Isn’t that the point?

I think the comment threads at Shakesville are humorless and way too self-important. But that is my opinion. So I don’t go there. evAr.

ahh, gawd, RB, the 70s were GREAT.

djur, the shorter HTML is more like “Shakesville has their thing. I have mine. Theirs pisses me off; mine pisses them off. Better maybe we both have our own spaces”

He didn’t imply that there shouldn’t be safe spaces. But one person’s safe space is another’s cloying restriction.

I do like, however, that a little Liberal Firing Squad brings HTML in from the crops.

Because, you know, typically he’s Outstanding In His Field.

Thankyew!! tip your Zombies!!

… i just thought that needed to be said, although nothing will top RB’s coloring book in THIS thread,

although nothing will top RB’s coloring book in THIS thread

Dude. Vagina Drag Racer. that is all.

Otherwise known as Cuban Driva BFF.

Otherwise known as Cuban Driva BFF.

O, that was elegant.

Is Yockey related to Yawkey, as in Tom Yawkey, as in Yawkey Way, as in Fenway Park?

zrm, my objection was to ‘I absolutely detest the mentality behind such concepts (sic) “safe zones” and “triggering”‘, which to me is more than just an implication that there shouldn’t be safe spaces. And triggering is, y’know, a psychological symptom of trauma and hardly deserving of dismissal and scare quotes.

OK, that’s the last I’m saying on this. These excruciating SOAP bindings won’t code against themselves, you know.

Apparently not, when we dont’t conform to the standards of some other place that some of us happen to like.

Again, I ask you to show your (or in this case, my) work in the form of a quote showing that I said this.

Asking you to leave some people the fuck alone is not requiring ANYTHING of you but to STFU about something of which you obviously do not approve but which is equally obviously none of your business.

Yes, it’s still annoyingly focused zombie troll time.

RB, I once had a Wife of Bath coloring book. It was quite as rude as the Tale. I think I gave it to one of my nephews in lieu of the sex education he wasn’t getting in school.

Furthermore, I suspect that Cynthia is a Subaru driver, not a Harley mama.

200th!

Can’t we all just get along?

Every time someone uses this phrase, all I can think of is Jack Nicholson in “Mars Attacks!”

And what happened next.

When I learned in November 2008 that Barack Obama had announced his intention to purge the Democratic party of everyone with common sense centrists…

Did she ever explain why President Obama would want to kick himself out of the Democratic Party? So confusing…

I can tell you and Jennifer to fuck yourselves at the same time with a bifurcated obelisk without worrying about someone with a scarring obelisk-related incident in their past.

But what if I was raped by the logos itself, so that any attempt to create order out of chaos, any statement even remotely true on your part is a triggering event? If so, Cynthia Yockey’s blog may be the only place I could be safe. I mean seriously, how can you guys be fighting about other stuff when there is so much carcass to be picked there? If discovering Amy Alkon was a fiver in the recesses of the couch, this is the-guy-on-late-night-TV-with-the-suit-with-the-question-marks-on-it-hollering-about-free-governenment-money level stuff.

For instance, did you know that Obama’s black relatives owned slaves? Cynthia discovered this ancient wingnut talking point recently on About.com, and who ever heard of inaccurate information on the Internet?

Obviously if the whole slave thing were true, that would make Obama a hypocrite every time he denounced slavery, which by the way really wasn’t so bad because the Muslims (or Arabs, or Nigerians, or one of those bad things Obama is, not clear on the difference) did it too.

Obama’s Relatives Never Were Brought Here Into Slavery, Because Obama’s Muslim Family Were The Ones Rounding Up The African Slaves!! Obama loathes white people calling them: Devils, Haunting Ghosts, Ignorant, Oppressors, etc… When It Was The Europian White Christians that Fought & Died to End Slavery, Both In Africa and America!!

A white man set them free!

Can’t we all just get along?

NOT UNTIL YOU RECOGNIZE THE HORROR OF THE CIRCUMCISION HOLOCAUST!!!!!!

I once had a Wife of Bath coloring book. It was quite as rude as the Tale.

Better that than a coloring book of Procopius’ Anecdota.

NOT UNTIL YOU RECOGNIZE THE HORROR OF THE CIRCUMCISION HOLOCAUST!!!!!!

No, I am proudly anti-Smegmitic.

That Wife of Bath thing appears to have been drawn by Greg Irons.

And triggering is, y’know, a psychological symptom of trauma and hardly deserving of dismissal and scare quotes.

Even though this is written in bad faith, you have me on the triggering thing.

I think the idea that “triggering” is a valid *online* concern is stupid. If you’re that sensitive, get off the fucking internet. Being careful about “triggering” in RL is a different thing, however.

“Shakesville has their thing. I have mine. Theirs pisses me off; mine pisses them off. Better maybe we both have our own spaces”

Yes. Also, my thing is better because you can be an asshole like djur while calling me an asshole and I won’t ban you. Now try the same thing at one of those hellholes.

But eat ONE brain, and everybody wants to pull out the shotguns and get all Half-Life (yes I am looking at N_B ONE UNDERSCORE!!)

To jump straight to the punchline: You fuck one goat…

You fuck one goat…

Nobody can fuck just one.

N__B said,

How does one pronounce that , anyway?

HTML, you’re an asshole….

What reason do you have to assume bad faith on my part, HTML? I’m a fairly long-standing regular commenter. Hell, I was on your side about the sammich. I haven’t accused you of bad faith. And I’m not arguing in bad faith, thank you very much. My concerns are exactly as stated, and I’m not just using this as an opportunity to goad you. If you notice, I was involved in this conversation before you were.

I don’t agree with you on triggering, and I guess I’ll leave it at that. It just seems to me that you heap far more vitriol on Shakesville etc. than you ever have on, say, RedState.

PeeJ.

I’m guessing Knob.

Kidding!! I’m Kidding!!! Log out of Half-Life, N__B!!

How does one pronounce that , anyway?

Shar-day.

Shorter, and radioactivity-free, nym origin story: Years ago I started using Ned Beaumont (from “The Glass Key”) as an online personal. N__B types faster.

FUCKFUCKFUCK.

“persona” too.

Log out of Half-Life, N__B!!

You’re in luck, it’s been Max Payne 2 recently. As long as you’re not a Russian mobster, I’m unlikely to cap your ass.

#

PeeJ said,

July 15, 2009 at 1:17 (kill)

N__B said,

How does one pronounce that , anyway?
#

zombie rotten mcdonald said,

July 15, 2009 at 1:18 (kill)

HTML, you’re an asshole….

Okay, admittedly there’s a fair number of complex consonants….

It just seems to me that you heap far more vitriol on Shakesville etc. than you ever have on, say, RedState.

OK, now if you’re a regular, you know this is not true.

ewick the Red? Trike Force?

I said that those people are scared of words, and they are. But words are also serious. Last time we had this go round here, the subject was shaved vaginas. Someone inevitably said the typical awful thing: that men who prefer a shaved vag are just manifesting their desire to fuck a pre-pubescent child. This was said in the typical, matter-of-fact, beyond-debate, agreed-upon-fact, sort of awful way common among those people. When I demurred that an aesthetic choice is not exactly grounds for nearly calling someone a child molester, those people still didn’t get it. Still, I didn’t ban people throwing around the child molester smear*. You can get banned for infinitely less harsh insults or even just word choice in a non-insulting context over at those hellholes. Not that this tolerance makes me/us awesome or brave or whatever here; it’s just the minimum standard any community should have.

*Double standard alert: Yes, I often call Chicago Cubs fans “Nazi Child Molesters.” But usually it’s hyperbole. And besides, *they* deserve it.

It just seems to me that you heap far more vitriol on Shakesville etc. than you ever have on, say, RedState.

I’d say this is not true, although (1) I’ve only been here a year and (2) HTML doesn’t need me to speak for him.

I’d say that I find Shakesville as a whole more annoying although far less disgusting than RedState. I expect idiocy from idiotic bigots. I’m annoyed when I find it among people with whom I share most or all basic values. I’m reasonably certain many Shakers find me annoying as well, based on the kind of reaction I got there.

I often call Chicago Cubs fans “Nazi Child Molesters.”

are you implying they are NOT?

news to me.

Tolerance?

Or laziness?

It just seems to me that you heap far more vitriol on Shakesville etc. than you ever have on, say, RedState.

You’re kidding me, right? I thought you were arguing in bad faith because of your initial shorter, which was so wrongly put I assumed it had to be out of dishonesty rather than ignorance. Then there’s this.

HTML, you’re an asshole….

Exactly.

Celia said,

July 14, 2009 at 18:28 (kill)

As a 27 year old lesbian, Sarah Palin isn’t that hot. Certainly not hot enough to change my political views. Of course, there appear to be far lower standards for politicians in that area.

Who was it who said that politics was just showbiz for ugly people?

You’re in luck, it’s been Max Payne 2 recently. As long as you’re not a Russian mobster, I’m unlikely to cap your ass.

I’ve been playing Serious Sam myself.

Kleer Skeletons are obviously Republicans – they’re frickin’ EVERYWHERE, tough to get rid of and annoying as hell!

Well, HTML makes fun of the wingnuts more, but he seems to be a lot more angry at the Shakers.

ewick the Red? Trike Force?

Those are compliments, relatively speaking.

Asking you to leave some people the fuck alone is not requiring ANYTHING of you but to STFU about something of which you obviously do not approve but which is equally obviously none of your business.

You mean Britney?

N__B.

re:

shakesville. Hey, I’m a white guy. Almost EVERYWHERE is a safe space for a white guy, and I don’t begrudge women, and gay, and transgender, and whatever, their own. I have no conception of what it must be like for people who are so typically marginalized in all little, daily interactions that they face every fackin day, so hey, whatevs, as a Shaker might say.

I actually like reading it from time to time, it is a refreshing POV, for me at least.

I used to post comments there occasionally, and never had anybody give me a problem. But as you might notice, my shtick is less ‘substantive commentary” than “obnoxious zombie persona” and POOP jokes, so you know, usually I hang at Bubba’s or 3Bulls.

I think the Shakers have maybe gotten more defensive after the John edwards thing with Melissa, and hey, no wonder. Here’s a private clubhouse that suddenly the Catholic Assholes want to tear down.

Sadly No has changed too, with the influx of mentally damaged trolls. It drove a few good old regulars away. But you know, this is the Interwebs; it flows and changes, it’s a river; if you want everything to remain the same forever, join the fargin Republican Party. Won’t stop things changing, but it might make you feel better.

alright, serious pants OFF. And you DON’T want to fuck with a zombie who has his pants off.

I often call Chicago Cubs fans “Nazi Child Molesters.”

So, are we Nazis who molest children, or do we molest Nazi children?

Both.

SayItWithWookies says at 6:15 pm, July 14th, 2009

“It’s a constant struggle to find decent things to eat on the road”

What, are the possums more careful crossing at night now?

That just made me laugh. This thread is not making me laugh. Shape up, peeple!

Just the one thing, since I missed most of the settling of whatever the fuck just went on.
And it was Humorless Feminists, all along. Boy, do I feel stupid now. You know, Humorless Feminists takes way longer to type than Penis.
I’m not sure where to start. Asking you to get off the cross? Raging at the monomaniacal nature of One Issue Syndrome? Pointing out that you didn’t ALL CAPS PENIS?

Yes, you are correct. All along it was Humorless Feminists. I find them to be a hilariously delicious target of mockery. Althought, and here is the important part, the key is the humorlessness. Humorless Republicans, Humorless Democrats, Humorless Bible-Thumpers, Humorless Old Gits That Want Me Offa Their Lawns, Humorless POOP and Humorless Lesbo Youstabees.

We keed about Shakers not because they are feminists – but because they (well at least some of they) take themselves too seriously. Much like how I’m acting right now – so I’ll have to be done with it lest I become the next target of teh Snarklynaughts.

I’m with HTML on this one. There’s a lot of poop being flung around on the internets; people whose psyches are shattered by someone typing the wrong combination of words probably should be doing something other than surfing the web.

Wait a minute, I’ve just destroyed Ann Althouse’s raison d’etre. Never mind.

There’s a lot of poop being flung around on the internets; people whose psyches are shattered by someone typing the wrong combination of words probably should be doing something other than surfing the web.

You mean, like going on FOX News and venting about their butthurt?

Speaking of butthurt:

Westerners literally sit on mountains of oil and gas
http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2009/07/13/AR2009071302852_2.html?sid=ST2009071302882

Owwww.

Westerners literally sit on mountains of oil and gas

Baked beans for energy freedom, folks.

Baked beans for energy freedom, folks.

Shoes for Industry, comrade.

Westerners literally sit on mountains of oil and gas

tell ’em not to smoke.

That Palin op-ed currently has 3,369 comments. If hits=ad revenue, I think the WaPo has found their new cash cow.

hey, I got to call HTML an asshole!!

Pablo Picasso was never called asshole.

In Soviet Texas, mountains of oil and gas sit on you.

…except for the one thing.

Does it start with “j”?

Jazzism?

Even as I type, she is in mid-rant providing considerable detail about how Sotomayor’s story was not nearly the “girl from the projects” triumph over adversity and racism that it has been portrayed to be.

Details are hard to type.

my political views transformed from those of a lifelong liberal, Democrat and global warming believer to those of a fiscal conservative who rejects theories of anthropogenic climate change because we are so totally NOT more influential on the climate than the sun, sunspots, the ocean and ocean currents.

You’d think in her 100 hours of intertubal reading she would have discovered that’s not what “climate change” means. Damn details again!

I have had bitter experiences at the hands of liberal fascists when I tried to get them to observe their stated principles and figured a change of scene would do me good

Liberal fascists? OMG Doughie had a boob reduction!

Throw in the Whaaaa!mbulance, and we’ll have our own version of The Wacky Races.

STFU about something of which you obviously do not approve but which is equally obviously none of your business.

Excuse me for failing to recognize that you’re in charge of Standards and Practices at this here network. Or, STFU yourownself.

I often call Chicago Cubs fans “Nazi Child Molesters.”

Hey, give us a little credit. Ever since 1945, underage Nazi victims have been hard to find.

Story of my life. Surrounded by dimbulbs, & I just don’t get them.

So…. M B, you’ve got some pretty good brains? Good, high quality brains? Are they fresh?

Well, I don’t really care about that fresh so much.

So, where are you hanging tonight? No reason, just curious. not hungry, no, not at all.

C’mon everyone, I didn’t pay my subscription for all this.

I DEMAND yogic flying humourless feminists eating giant sammiches while POOPing on various combinations of PENIS, while holding the worlds biggest denounceathon because being nice to the poor = STALIN+HITLER!!!!!

You know, I youstabee all for confirming Sonia Sotomayor to the Supreme Court – but then I found out what side of ninja nunchuk ban she was on. You can have my ninja nunchuks when you pry them out of the cold dead hands of my Shinobi hordes.

Shoes for Industry, comrade.

…So you see, Mudhead, it actually benefits our side to re-enlist!

Damm. Finally, we eradicated the trolls. Do we get a breathing (snarking) space of even 1 day. Noooo! I don’t even know what this flame war is about.

You can have my ninja nunchuks when you pry them out of the cold dead hands of my Shinobi hordes.

I am happy to sell your filthy nunchuks down Lieberal Confiscation Boulevard as long as I can hang onto my shuriken.
~

A flame war about nothing? Hey, it made Jerry Seinfeld a millionaire.

Do we get a breathing (snarking) space of even 1 day. Noooo! I don’t even know what this flame war is about.

Just the type of thing someone like you would say.

Knights in White Satin said,

July 15, 2009 at 2:14

Damm. Finally, we eradicated the trolls. Do we get a breathing (snarking) space of even 1 day. Noooo! I don’t even know what this flame war is about.

What are you talking about? YOU STARTED ALL THIS !!!!

I can remove your nunchaku and shuriken and then cave in your sternum.

…wow, that was pretty aggressive, wasn’t it?

Bear in mind that only the most enlightened beings are capable of yogic flying – like Shoko Asahara, beloved spiritual leader and purveyor of nerve gas.

And you DON’T want to fuck with a zombie who has his pants off.

You usually fuck with your pants on? What, detachable?

And thus ends the long, bitter struggle of the Great Shakes-Sadly War of 21:02 14 July 2009 – 2:17 15 July 2009.

Today the guns are silent. A great tragedy has ended. A great victory has been won… Also, blart, etc.

Eat me, un-dead filth!

(Uh, wait a minute …)

Certainly the ego part of my massive cerebellum (& memory for big ol’ Latinate words) is in good shape.

But you might as well be drinking milk from rBST-fed cows, considering all the SSRIs in there.

I have crossed Sheryl Crow off my list, also. No one who filthies her lips w/ the Blood-Spatter Banner song while a B2 “Cowardice from Above” bomber flies over is getting those lips anywhere near mine, you betcha!

What, detachable?

Of course it’s detachable. He’s a friggin’ zombie fer cryin’ outloud! All his parts is detachable!

…wow, that was pretty aggressive, wasn’t it?

Zombies.

Just because you or I don’t experience triggers like victims of sexual assault do doesn’t mean that we get to discount or trivialize them.

Also, this is pretty crappy. You assume that people without “triggering” issues must never have been sexually assaulted. Well, I was. As a child. I still make fun of “Nazi Child Molesters.” I don’t demand that anyone avoid talking about anything lest it “trigger” something awful for me.* Like most people, I do object to being called in so many words a child molester, but other than that, I’m pretty fucking tolerant unless someone gets terribly personal (like, say, making fun of me for the specific troubles I had in Denver — and even then I won’t ban you for transgressing my sacred “safe space”). Pity those people aren’t; more’s the pity that they demand so much of others.

*I think Amanda ended up saying basically the same thing, thus showing that the principle of free discourse matters to her more than her own feely-feelings, which is why her place is much better not only qualitatively in terms of content (comments and posts) but also *morally* than those hellholes mentioned above.

Hey, give us a little credit. Ever since 1945, underage Nazi victims have been hard to find.

Apparently not as hard for you to find as a World Championship. Losers. Masochists. Psychos.

All his parts is detachable!

So when he says to excuse his fingers you have to really watch out, those little fuckers could be ANYWHERE.

Did I miss something, or is “humorless feminist” not a right wing trope against feminists? And while I get this that is a humor blog – one that, incidentally, I love, love, love (though never comment) – isn’t it also filled to the brim with people who claim to be feminists?

I have to agree that while I really don’t always care for the over-the-top shit that sometimes goes on at Shakesville, and rarely read there, the shit against the community there seems excessive.

ANYWAY. The subject of this post is far more ridiculous, so…entertain me, monkeys!

only the most enlightened beings are capable of yogic flying

Hey, I was watching the home run derby yesterday and there seemed to be a lack of poor people sitting there hoping their man would win them a home this year.

I only noticed it because it really used to piss me off, the whole ‘poor people as showbiz entertainment’ factor.

Whats going on America? Have the muslincommies invaded sport too?

“I think the idea that “triggering” is a valid *online* concern is stupid. If you’re that sensitive, get off the fucking internet.”

Right on! If you have PTSD, no internet for you! Because people who have been traumatized to the point that some words and images cause flashbacks and panic attacks… those folks don’t deserve any consideration, anywhere, ever.

I thought we were liberals and somewhat interested in being compassionate toward people who’ve gotten fucked up through no fault of their own, but sadly, no, I guess – not even in the most abstract sense, not even to the point of approving that they create safe spaces for themselves somewhere else entirely on some other online fora where you never have to see it or think about it if you don’t want to.

HTML, you’ve given me a lot of laughs over the years of reading this site, but right now on this point, you’re coming off like a jackass.

Apparently not as hard for you to find as a World Championship. Losers. Masochists. Psychos.

OK. now this is a little over the line cruel, even for a zombie. They are friggin CUBS fans, fercrissakes. What, are they gonna take pride in the BEARS?

Sheesh, next you’re gonna take after Lions fans.

Kate – See Dragon-King Wangchuck above at 1:45 pm.

He sums it all up quite well.

Hoping for a George Will heart -attack:

President Obama came out to throw the first pitch at the All-Star thing, & he was wearing jeans!!31!1!! & a White Sox wind-breaker.

Is this connected to HTML’s accusations against Cub fans?

watch out, those little fuckers could be ANYWHERE.

tig, this made me laugh till I cried.

Good brainz on ya, friend. Uh, where are you hanging out tonight? Again, I’m not HONGRY or anything….

ANYWAY. The subject of this post is far more ridiculous, so…entertain me, monkeys!

Your wish is my command, Madam.

Feel the authenticity.

Feel it.

Right on! If you have PTSD, no internet for you! Because people who have been traumatized to the point that some words and images cause flashbacks and panic attacks… those folks don’t deserve any consideration, anywhere, ever.

Excuse me, but that’s just patent BULLSHIT. Suppose I was traumatized because I nearly choked to death on a shrimp. Therefore, it’s an ASSAULT upon me if anyone posts a shrimp recipe online. Let’s say you’re one of those people who have an irrational fear of birds. No bird identification sites allowed!

At some point, you’ve got to be a fucking ADULT and just avoid the things that give you problems instead of insisting that the rest of the world pretend they don’t exist.

(& memory for big ol’ Latinate words)

But are they Wise Latinate?

Kate, it’s not the feminist thing we mock, it’s the humorless part.

Although As I noted somewhere above, it’s never stopped me from being more or less accepted here, and I’m facking dead.

Scuse mah finGAHS!!

no really, a couple of them are still missing, and I wanted to masturbate tonight. RB, are they in your coloring book?

You assume that people without “triggering” issues must never have been sexually assaulted.

I do not, but to clarify, please insert “some” between “like” and “victims” in the offending statement.

Westie makes a valid point, albeit one I didn’t want to make for fear of extending the argument. If there was a blog or discussion forum for veterans to discuss their issues in an environment that was respectful of the trauma some of the community members had experienced, would you decry that as a moral abomination as well?

shakesville. Hey, I’m a white guy. Almost EVERYWHERE is a safe space for a white guy, and I don’t begrudge women, and gay, and transgender, and whatever, their own.

I agree. Which is why when I realized that I didn’t fit in there – i.e., they were annoying me and I was annoying them – I left quietly. They’ll do their thing and I wandered a bit and ended here doing mine.

I think folks everywhere would get along much better if they all just settled down in their easy chairs and remembered that each and every person in this whacky, wonderful world is a sorry-ass piece of shit except me.

Uh, where are you hanging out tonight? Again, I’m not HONGRY or anything….

Tonight I’m getting a deep lobe massage. And then trying on titanium razorwire hats.

…would you decry that as a moral abomination as well?

No. But they would be entirely unwelcome in coming here or somewhere else and insisting that everyone at that site adhere to the boundaries they’ve set up at their own.

Westie makes a valid point

No, he doesn’t. See Jennifer.

Let’s say you’re one of those people who have an irrational fear of birds

here’s the thing. When I was a young zombie, my parent’s house had an open stair at one end of the living room, and they located the tv at the other end. One night, Hitchcock’s “The Birds” was being broadcast, and having heard them talk about looking forward to seeing it, I wanted to also. They said it would bruise my tender lil mind.

So when they sent me to bed, I crept back down and watched the fackin thing through the bannister. Fackin birds. Fackin Hitchcock., I STILL get creeped out whenever I walk past a big nunch of birds sitting on something, seagulls make me cringe, and a flock of birds make me freak.

Fackin Hitchcock. If he was alive, I would go and kick his facking ass.

fackin birds.

Pointing out that you didn’t ALL CAPS PENIS?

lower-case penii have size issues.

“Let’s say you’re one of those people who have an irrational fear of birds. No bird identification sites allowed!”

Nobody’s saying this. Instead, you and HTML are the ones saying “no birdless websites allowed,” or at best “birdless websites are morally inferior to my own.” I just don’t see where there’s an objective moral weight on what particular standards a group chooses to have for their own online community. There’s plenty of right-wing sites which more or less have “no libtardz” rules, and I don’t see the moral outrage there. There’s feminist (and other) communities which control sexist speech and couch explicit references to sexual abuse in trigger warnings. There’s gaming, film, and book blogs which demand the use of spoiler protection or forbid their posting entirely. And there are humor blogs who ban users for repeatedly posting with names like “mikey smells like shit” and “homosexuals are aids monkeys.” I don’t see any of these as moral issues, but HTML does, and as long as he does he’s going to find the Internet to be a morally abominable place.

Do you get what I’m saying?

But Jennifer, nobody is demanding that you adhere to another site’s boundaries and rules. That’s a total strawman.

ANYWAY. The subject of this post is far more ridiculous, so…entertain me, monkeys!

I tried! Maybe a crossover is in order…

HTML Mencken loathes Feminist people calling them: Devils, Haunting Ghosts, Ignorant, Oppressors, PENIS etc… When It Was The Europian Feminist that Fought & Died to End Slavery, Both In Africa and America!!

Instead, you and HTML are the ones saying “no birdless websites allowed,” or at best “birdless websites are morally inferior to my own.”

Oh, the fuck. We are saying “we have the right to express our opinion that birdless websites are TEH SUXXOR and it’s our right to MOCK BIRDLESS WEBSITES whenever we like on our own turf.”

Did anyone in this entire thread who expressed agreement with my assessment in principle suggest that Shakesville be shut down? Not just no, but fuck no. We don’t go there because we find it not to our liking, and to go there and harp on that relentlessly would be to be a troll and to be doing, well, essentially what you’re doing right now, which is insisting that this site adhere to the standards of a different online community.

There’s plenty of right-wing sites which more or less have “no libtardz” rules, and I don’t see the moral outrage there.

Oh come on. They blatantly excise anybody who disagrees with them. I think HTML and even Tintin (who, I believe, has been the most active in use of disemvowellment and banhammer) agree that when you run the site, you get to make the rules.

I get the impression that while HTML DOES, in fact, see these things as moral issues, he comes down basically on the side of letting the free, rampant, and unruly flow of conversation to spew as it will. But to claim that he is saying that websites that have different POVs on this should not be allowed to exist is unjustified, I feel.

After all, if websites that operate from a differing viewpoint from S,N were non-existent, than what would S,N mock? Probably zombies!

And fercrissakes, we don’t want that.

only the most enlightened beings are capable of yogic flying

Not enlightened.

Enlightened!

Jennifer, what standard am I insisting you adhere to, other than “try not to personally attack other long-standing friendly members of the community?”

Probably zombies!

And fercrissakes, we don’t want [them].

The truth always outs.

Djur, maybe you suffer from impaired reading comprehension, but no one personally attacked any other long-standing friendly members of the community – aside from Gentlewoman, who took offense at someone mocking a website she happens to like and enjoy.

That someone was me, BTW, and I retain my right to express the opinion that I find Shakesville insufferable.

But Jennifer, nobody is demanding that you adhere to another site’s boundaries and rules.

technically, true. But Gentlewoman, for all her other fine attributes, sarcastically impugned that that Jennifer was out of line for using the phrase “Humorless feminist”.

Which, much as I’ve read around here, has never been identified as an out of bounds construct.

But demanding it? No, nobody made a direct demand. Now, if somebody goes and says ‘humorless brain-eating zombie’ I may have to come and take your nunchucks.

Now, I demand that you excess my joust, tribs!

Do you get what I’m saying?

No, I don’t think you have explained your thinking. Perhaps another 35,000 words would do the trick?

Jennifer, I never see “humorless” applied to any other “group”. That’s what the problem is…it’s not actually about humorless people, of which there are many, feminists and non, it’s that that’s the trope. It’s meant to malign feminists. Perhaps I’m wrong about that, and perhaps you meant no ill intent (and I don’t believe you did – I’m a fan of your comments generally), but that’s my take.

Djur, come sit by me.

ITTDGY, LOL.

In my first online community – Jim Gleick’s “Pipeline”, circa 1994 – I posted an attack on Rudy Guiliani which was quite mild compared to how I feel about that fascistic motherfucker. Two people felt it necessary to tell me how, by attacking a politician they liked, I had attacked them and owed them an apology.

People never fail to amaze me.

I see that I may have to challenge N__B to a duel…..

Hand drafting at twenty paces!!

Hand drafting at twenty paces!!

You’re on, dead boy. I was hand drafting when you were just a little zomboid.

Hand drafting at twenty paces!!

Paper cuts, people.

With surveys.

Yeah, but the zombie gets to choose whose hand he’ll use.

Jennifer, I never see “humorless” applied to any other “group”.

Kate, let me introduce you to the Half Hour News Hour.

(There’s plenty to choose from, and they’re all FINE!)

Do you get what I’m saying?

No, I don’t. Anti-spoiler rules, or even some anti-troll rules, are *not* about morals but instead are about pragmatism, a need to keep conversation flowing — it is absolutely *not* about morals, or fucking feely-feelings. The stupidity at the hellholes is *only* about morals: “bad” language supposedly being indicative of bad character, and the use of such language is deemed an “action” capable of “inflicting” pain upon others. In contrast, the stupid comment policies are supremely *impractical* on the grounds that Jennifer mentioned: it’s impossible to guard against all possible “triggers” and pointless to try unless you get some kind of petty thrill out of it (“I am saving the world by educating X about his poor word choice.”), which I suspect some of the more Stalinist morans at those sites do.

Since the hellholes’ policies are about moral judgment, they are subject to moral judgment.

There’s a difference between a general “no trolls” policy and the sort of paternalist, coddling crap you’re defending.

Westie’s offended. Yeah, well I’m offended. The person who mattered most to me in my life was a vet with extreme PTSD. Don’t tell me I don’t care about such things just because I think it’s stupid, impractical, and morally retarded to seriously attempt to create places on the freaking internet where such people need to be protected from stray *words*. Put your offended energy into bashing the VA, etc, for not taking better care of these people, rather than wasting it trying to police the internet. Christ.

Paper cuts, people.

Paper? Back when I was a youngin, we used to practice flinging lucite triangles Odd-Job/throwing-star style. When one of them went through one face of a hollow-core door and stuck in the opposite side, we realized it might be a tad dangerous.

Jennifer, I never see “humorless” applied to any other “group”. That’s what the problem is…it’s not actually about humorless people, of which there are many, feminists and non, it’s that that’s the trope. It’s meant to malign feminists.

Crap, maybe Jennifer is better to address this, after all she made the original comment, but I think this is the kind of thing that HTML gets riled up about.

This website goes ON AND ON about humorless wingnuts, humorless pundits, humorless politicians, and humorless facking zombies. it’s a daily thing.

It’s the zeroing in on ONE usage of this word in conjunction with feminist, and the immediate high umbrage, that becomes a bit off-putting.

While,a s HTML points out, the CIA is admitting to secret, unacknowledged missions that are as yet undefined. While 15% of Americans go without health insurance. While the economy continues to melt down. While American soldiers continue to die for no reason in Mideastern countries. While our Elected Government continues to FUCKING TORTURE PEOPLE TO DEATH, as far as we know.

Look, I have no intention to dismiss anybody’s personal pain and trauma. Pasta knows, we all have plenty of that. My inclination is to make cheesy horror movie jokes and talk about music I like.

But COME On.

Sheesh, it makes me want Troofy to visit.

Kate – did you read Wangchuck’s take on it?

There are plenty of groups that get mocked for humorlessness, and Wangchuck did a pretty good job of listing them. Is it the construction “humorless feminist”? Well, given that the context was a mention of Feministing and Jezebel, both of which have – excuse the observance – fairly rigid POVs – it fit.

You know, I once had someone tell me that the following joke was “misogynistic”: God creates Adam, Adam gets lonely, asks God to make him a companion. God says, I’ll make a woman for you. Adam asks, what’s a woman? God says, oh, you’ll like her. She’ll keep you company, cook and clean, and have sex with you. Adam says, gee, God, that sounds great. What’s that gonna run me? God says, one arm and one leg. Adam says, I dunno God…that’s pretty steep. What can I get for a rib?

You know, if you’re humorless, you’ll focus in on the “cooking and cleaning” as a stereotype of women. If you aren’t, you’ll think it’s funny as hell, because Adam being a cheap lazy bastard went with the stripped down model, and instead got a woman who doesn’t cook or clean and isn’t always up for the sex.

I really can’t explain it more than that.

You’re on, dead boy. I was hand drafting when you were just a little zomboid.

You ever try DRAWING a zombid? Got me an A in drafting class, Underscorey!!!

ZOMBOID, rather.

Zombid is just stupid.

Not a lesbian! Same kind of ex-liberal like in comments says “as a lifelong Democrat…” and “I have always been an active liberal, but…”

Fake Shemp!

This thread is now in danger of yurning out humorless SadlyNaughts.

We need more POOP!

Oh, and PENIS.

Apparently not as hard for you to find as a World Championship. Losers. Masochists. Psychos.

Oh, pfffffft. On our worst day, we still have more class than White Sox fans. The only person we ever molest is Alfonso Soriano, and he deserves it.

Or even Turning out.

Scuse my typing finGAHS

Kate has a point. The whole “humorless” thing is an misanthropic jibe used to denigrate feminists. It’s a crutch to fall back on that to make a joke.

Also, penis-size, old people forgetting stuff, fatty fat fatties, teh living impaired and their hunger for neural matter, Nazi child molesters who are both Nazis who molest children as well as molesters of Nazi children.

And with the exception of the zombies, they are humorless gits that can keep telling me to TURN THAT AWFUL NOISE DOWN. No man, you just don’t understand my music OLD MAN!!one

Also the Nazi child molesters. It’s unimagineable to be a Cubs fan without having a sense of humor.

Why are mommy and daddy fighting?

D-K W, I have Neil Young TURNED UP LOUD.

If you want me to turn it down, you will have to submit your brains.

And drinks.

And a little weed.

… wait.

Is it something we did?

#

Why are mommy and daddy fighting?

because Mommy is a HUMOURLESS FEMINIST.

(british spelling added for LULZ)

“a newly conservative lesbian,”

It would be so much cooler if she were a newly lesbian conservative.

Why are mommy and daddy fighting?

Mommy’s humorless comment about Daddy’s lower-case penis.

in re. ‘humorless’ – ‘Humorless’ is a way of framing your lame-ass jokes bombing as you being too radical instead of you being unfunny, and the people who sling around the “humorless feminist” trope are not fucking funny. They’re half-wits like Acey whose idea of high wit would be perfectly in-place in The Family Circus.
This is at least in America. In the UK, it retains its earlier, purer use of harassing people socially for not finding minstrelsy a laugh riot.

Google gives 33 results for “humorless wingnut”; 172 results for “humorless right-wing”; 338 for “humorless conservative”, and 3400 for “humorless feminist”.

If you don’t think, on the balance, you’d find someone who describes themselves as “politically incorrect” funny (knowing what that self-label means in practice rather than in theory, I don’t want that fucking argument), you shouldn’t be fucking using ‘humorless’. It is a way the right gets to dance around bombing because they’re weepy little babies who can’t handle adversity, and it’s like telling anyone with a sense of humor that you need training wheels and a big gentle pat on the head from a series of AM radio DJs.

ITTGY – owned.

HTML, I submit that there are some people who might need to get something from places like that, and “those hellholes” might be a place for them. I suspect that’s what they intend to be there for. I find it obnoxious, but I’m not their target audience. No one is saying that you suck because you don’t like it there, not at all. I just think it’s a little strange that you can’t blow it off and think “not for me”. I mean, I don’t hang out in bars where people are dicks, but there are many bars which host and court dicks. If I don’t want to hang out with them, I leave the bar and go hang out in one sans dicks. Right? Oh, and if I owned my own bar? No douchebag policy, for real.

A perusal of the first five Gazoogle News result pages for ‘humorless’ turned up “Humorless ‘Beth Cooper,'” “humorless Obama-hater,” “humorless dolts” “humorless face of Scientology,” “humorless Daphne Zuniga,” “humorless buzz saw of Olympic lawyers,””humorless nancies of the Far Left,” “humorless German hag named Susannah,” “humorless Roman enforcers,” “humorless idiots,” “humorless portrayal,” and two instances of “humorless feminist.” Forging ahead to page twelve I found “humorless EU, “humorless Soviet envoy,” a second appearance of “humorless dolt,” “humorless dildos[sic],” and “humorless performance by Shia Labeouf,” with no more “humorless feminists.” Those are the news results, of course, and you’ll find many more “humorless feminists” by searching elsewhere, but I think it’s reasonable to say that humorlessness is catholic in its affiliations.

Mommy’s humorless comment about Daddy’s lower-case penis.

You just had to go there again, didn’t you?

Sadly, Jr. & Little Sadlene said,

Is it something we did?

As if you even haz to ask, guilty childs!

Sorry z r m D-K W already finished the drinks and the weed. Oh, and lookat that, no more brain cells.

Mommy’s humorless comment about Daddy’s lower-case penis.

You just had to go there again, didn’t you?

I’m trying to get away from there. But Daddy keeps dragging me back.

No, I meant with the lower-casing and all.

PENIS, dammit, PENIS!!!

And before another flame war starts…I’m not sayin’ D-K W is stupid, I’m just sayin’ drinks and weed’ll do that to ya.

A perusal of the first five Gazoogle News result pages for ‘humorless’ turned up “Humorless ‘Beth Cooper,’” “humorless Obama-hater,” “humorless dolts” “humorless face of Scientology,” “humorless Daphne Zuniga,” “humorless buzz saw of Olympic lawyers,””humorless nancies of the Far Left,” “humorless German hag named Susannah,” “humorless Roman enforcers,” “humorless idiots,” “humorless portrayal,” and two instances of “humorless feminist.” Forging ahead to page twelve I found “humorless EU, “humorless Soviet envoy,” a second appearance of “humorless dolt,” “humorless dildos[sic],” and “humorless performance by Shia Labeouf,” with no more “humorless feminists.” Those are the news results, of course, and you’ll find many more “humorless feminists” by searching elsewhere, but I think it’s reasonable to say that humorlessness is catholic in its affiliations.

Half of those are ‘humorless’ in the generic sense of ‘brutal’, and most of the rest have a certain ideological alignment: lefties, dildos, the EU, feminists. I am saying it is a trope and is a big deal on the right, and is in about the same broader taste as going on about crass mothers on welfare you have known, however honest you are being.

No, I meant with the lower-casing and all.

Mrs. Thomas at school said I should never talk to a man about his lower casing. She said God wanted sausages and their casings to be private.

And a little weed.

Just what we need, a zombie with the munchies.

Sicks & stones, you stupid motherfucking assholes, sticks & stones.

#

Why are mommy and daddy fighting?

Because Mommy is a HUMOURLESS FEMINIST.

(british spelling added for LULZ)

Hmmm. Ms. Yockey’s latest post starts with “Sadly, Yes!” Coincidence or coded message?

Also, Tintin — French, Fag or Both?

Also, bear in mind that I searched for “humorless feminist” and so on, not without the quotes:

Results 1 – 10 of about 33,900 for humorless (conservative|right-wing|wingnut|Republican).

Results 1 – 10 of about 28,300 for humorless feminist. (0.26 seconds)

One of these things is not like the other, one of these things just doesn’t belong.

‘Humourless feminist’ returns 98K hits, so I might be wrong about the Brits and their advanced asses.

Also, Tintin — French, Fag or Both?

French fag, or Frenchest fag?

Because Mommy is a HUMOURLESS FEMINIST.

No vital humours? Is she dead? Is she a……….wait for it……..ZOMBIE?

Coincidence or coded message?

Did she get a salad out of the traffic?

#

And before another flame war starts…I’m not sayin’ D-K W is stupid, I’m just sayin’ drinks and weed’ll do that to ya.

See, here’s the thing.

A brain that has some alcohol and drugs innit, is kind of like watermelon shots.

The psychoactives are already mostly processed, so you can get a pretty good buzz.

Also, because the physical effects are mainly part of the delivery system, not the drugs themselves, the initial host is the one that suffers the deleterious effects re liver and such as.

See? Now you’re mostly thinking “hey… that is kind of cool”

It would be so much cooler if she were a newly lesbian conservative.

Well, considering who might be responsible for the conversion, it certainly wouldn’t be hotter.

#

Just what we need, a zombie with the munchies.

dammit, you made me spit djur’s brainz all over my monitor….

You guys are just begging for a Feministing! or Jezebel smackdown, aren’t you?!

At least Teh Sammich isn’t in the pic.

…the rest have a certain ideological alignment: lefties, dildos,…

wait, humorless dildos?

New Fascist Lesbian sez:

May you be rewarded 10-fold for your kind gift by the prospering power of the universe!

“The Secret” or Prosperity Gospel?

It would be so much cooler if she were a newly lesbian conservative.

If you’ve ever known lesbians, you know that because the dating pool is small, drama is a huge deal. It just is, there is no way around it unless you live in Austin or Portland or some other horrible place where it is a crime not to feign respect for the Indigo Girls.

Now imagine your dating drama, and enhance it with wingnuts.

I think I like ‘newly conservative lesbian’ better, to be honest. At least this way there’s an inevitable trajectory towards either dancing monkey or horrible ex-gay, and both are schadenfreudetastic.

…the rest have a certain ideological alignment: lefties, dildos,…

wait, humorless dildos?

I am hard-pressed to think of something more frightening than a dildo with a smiley-face on it.

I love this site, and thanks for hosting us, BTW. Awesome.

“The Secret” or Prosperity Gospel?

Jesus was a lesbian millionaire and you can be too.

I like both Sadly No and Shakesville for completely different reasons.

I believe that will be my only addition to the weird flame war.

dammit you fuckers I have to get some work done, and the humorless dildos KEEP DRAGGING ME BACK IN!!!

…the rest have a certain ideological alignment: lefties, dildos,…

wait, humorless dildos?

If it is two degrees of separation or fewer from the East German women’s swim team, conservatives typically find themselves unable to be witty when it comes to it. (See Christopher Hitchens, whose typical reaction to lesbians is whining about nobody being interested in his titties.)

humorless dildos KEEP DRAGGING ME BACK IN!!!

Dildos with arms? Ouch.

You are all a bunch of humorless dildos.

Gawd, I don’t think that’s going to get old.

dammit, you made me spit djur’s brainz all over my monitor….

My brains! I need those to whine humorlessly!

no you don’t djur.

I’m not sayin’ D-K W is stupid, I’m just sayin’ drinks and weed’ll do that to ya.
I’ll have you know teh stoppit is not me am one of those. Proofiness is typnigs plusgüt. Me smrt- like Fox Nooz Chun-Li.

Confession-time. I have never in my life smoked weed. Not once. True story.

wait, humorless dildos?

Unpossible. Dildoes (either spelling is acceptable, Sen. Quayle) are intrinsically humorous. Of course, some varieties are funnier than others. When a prospective playmate produced his inflatable model, I laughed myself right out of a blowjob.

…it is a crime not to feign respect for the Indigo Girls

Sounds reasonable to me – but only because of the guitar solo in Land of Cannan.

Confession-time. I have never in my life smoked weed. Not once. True story.

I get my weed from a dude named Whitey. It’s good weed, so I’m legitimately conflicted.

Confession-time. I have never in my life smoked weed. Not once. True story.

dangit. Do you know somebody who has?

I put the [sic] at the end of “humorless dildos” because there are no such animals. Dildos are resolutely good-humored. There isn’t a word or image that could make the dildo bearing it humorless. Can’t be done.

actually, I don’t have to feign respect for the Indigo Girls, I once saw them on a bill with the Jayhawks and Matthew Sweet, I like them.

But then, I eatz brains, so YMMV.

Actually for the newly lesbian conservative option, I’m just imagining some tattooed leather dyke smoking a cigarette going, “be patient, we’ll get her the rest of the way tomorrow night.”

Oddly enough, political conversion sapphc sex often involves humorless dildos, little known dyke secret.

Too many beginner dykes try and use a strap-on with a big smiley face on it and form a libertarian. And that children is how we got Ayn Rand.

Hmmm. Ms. Yockey’s latest post starts with “Sadly, Yes!” Coincidence or coded message?

Was it posted after the Sadly, No post? Is Yockey lurking here? Talk to us, Cynthia! We’re very respectful here, especially of wingnuts who beg for money for salads or barbeque grills. Let us know where you stand on the issue of humorless dildos.

alec, basic language theory applies here. If it had been a right-winger talking about ‘humourless feminists’ to other right-wingers, that would have been to reinforce a memetic trope / stereotype used to dismiss feminism. But jennifer – herself a feminist, I believe I can safely assume – talking about ‘humourless feminists’ to other feminists carries a vastly different meaning. More ‘lighten up ferchrissakes’ than ‘neener, neener, address my post, libs’.

alec, I get my doo from a white named Weedy.

I thin I duz it rong.

Now might be a really bad time to ask, but what the hell: What did happen to mikey? I haven’t been following the comments threads as much as I would like to. I just know I haven’t seen him at all lately.

FUCK YOU GUYS. Stop being humorful.

I think I like ‘newly conservative lesbian’ better, to be honest.

You’re probably right. I just thought the conversion-to-lesbianism story would be more entertaining. If not necessarily erotic . . .

Now might be a really bad time to ask, but what the hell: What did happen to mikey?

Ask him.

http://stoopid_stuff.blogspot.com/

#

already done. Humorless Undead, right here.

WHERE THE HELL’S MAH FIN-GAHS?

alec, basic language theory applies here. If it had been a right-winger talking about ‘humourless feminists’ to other right-wingers, that would have been to reinforce a memetic trope / stereotype used to dismiss feminism. But jennifer – herself a feminist, I believe I can safely assume – talking about ‘humourless feminists’ to other feminists carries a vastly different meaning. More ‘lighten up ferchrissakes’ than ‘neener, neener, address my post, libs’.

I take it you know what they (and by ‘they’ I mean second-graders) say about assuming, but granting that assumption, it’s still giving a right-wing meme air whether or not it’s being done in good faith. ‘Humorless’ is how Hitch excuses away whiskey dick and the observation it purports to represent is based on a stereotype.

I have literally only ever seen ‘humorless’ used three ways: (a) as an inexact synonym for “dour” in descriptive language; (b) as a naive error for “unfunny”; and (c) in the form “What do you call one rape every one and a half seconds” / “Uh what” / “Not enough” / “That’s not funny you fucking asshole” / “Shut up, you humorless dyke”. (Substitute in other ideologies as needed for the privileged asshole to presume people are not laughing at his wacky wit because of.)

I find the usage here particularly ironic, because the ancillary trope to “humorless feminist” is “humorless leftist”.

alec, I get my doo from a white named Weedy.

I thin I duz it rong.

You are a cold-blooded killer, but it takes all kinds . . . to make a world.

Dildo with Pol Pot’s face on the glans? Nope, still good-humored. Dildo with the C-word on it? Nope, good-humored, and possibly eligible for inclusion in the Whitney Biennial. Dildo with “9-11” printed on the shaft? Still good-humored, and trenchant.

yeah, the newly conservative lesbian story is probably funnier in a watching a trainwreck sort of way, but it’s just fundamentally heart-breaking. Dykes tend to be…unforgiving…often about most tenets of conservatism so our esteemed mock-target has let a syphilitic brain and an inability to grasp the reality of a black president to shrink her potential dating pool to essentially hoping Ann Coulter decides to come out.

I guess for the trainwreck lovers (and why wouldn’t we be if we are here) it will be interesting to watch the sexual starvation feed the paranoid crazy.

OK, you liked the saga of the Shithouse Troll, and since the topic is:

Dildos with arms? Ouch.

I must tell you the story of my foul-mouthed younger sister from when we were kids. She got off on this kick of saying PENIS. I mean, shit, she was Sadly,No! thirty years before there was a Sadly, No!

There was this kid Ted who lived in the neighborhood. She dubbed him “Ted, Ted, PENIS head.” So there’s this 8-year-old kid running around the neighborhood and the house saying “PENIS!” all the time. One day she and I and my brother are downstairs watching TV, and she and he get into over something, and she says, “You’re nothing but a big PENIS! You’ve got PENIS ARMS, and PENIS LEGS, and a PENIS BODY, and a PENIS HEAD..” So my brother comes walking across the room, almost in like slo-mo, and he’s pinwheeling his arms slowly as he advances, and she just stands there as he walks up close enough to start hitting her with his arms as they pinwheel and says, “Gee, those PENIS ARMS sure do HURT, don’t they?” And she of course runs screaming and crying away as I dissolve into a fit of helpless laughter.

Dildo with “Ceci n’est pas un dildo” printed on it? Still a humorless cup of fur.

But did your sister declaim on the topic of PENIS PENIS?

she was Sadly,No! thirty years before there was a Sadly, No!

Holy shit, lady, I hope you let her out of the straitjacket by now…

and by that I mean no disrespect to my insane brethren and sistren.,…

What the fucking fuck have you people been doing while I was napping? Just get out your “fuck youse guys!” and walk away for the day, geez.

There’s no need to make some dramatic speech about this and that on these sorts of matters. Dramatics just prolongs the time it takes for things to boil down to fuck you, no, fuck you.

Yes, you’ll look immature, but what the fuck, you’re arguing about name-calling, there’s no way to make that look mature.

If you just fast-forward to the anticlimax, we can get back to bitching about Yousta-Les-Bee’s Cuban friend’s shocking lack of concern for a Democrat.

(seriously, what is it with exiles from communist nations always being Republicans in this country? The Vietnamese do the same damned thing.)

mikey left (shortly after I gave him his fadgerrific new nym, too) because people just couldn’t stop feeding the troll(s). And he didn’t like that. So he left.

YOU ALL SUCK. IF YOU DONT LIKE IT WHY DONT YOU JUST FUCKING LEAVE ALREADY!

And, a non size–issued penis.

Seriously, Jennifer, I’m crying. It’s like a Lifetime movie.

Jennifer’s PENIS brother.

Yes, you’ll look immature, but what the fuck, you’re arguing about name-calling, there’s no way to make that look mature.

you’re an immature, humorless dildo.

(seriously, what is it with exiles from communist nations always being Republicans in this country? The Vietnamese do the same damned thing.)

My gut sez that it’s a lot more common for Republican officials to red-light soft-left refugees than it is for Democratic officials to red-light hard-right refugees. Gerald Ford had South Asians killed for less than being potential Democrats, after all.

And I mean that in a supportive, non judgmental way.

Seriously, Jennifer, I’m crying. It’s like a Lifetime movie.

It’s been an interesting life in its own weird, warped way.

Careful editing:

YOU ALL SUCK…a non size–issued penis.

It’s like a Lifetime movie.

But with more PENIS.

Jennifer, it’s central to my point that you would find the idea of a young girl being battered with PENIS amusing, and may god save you, &c.

St. Trotsky, we’ve just been dorking around waiting for YOU.

So unload the PENIS already.

#

But with more PENIS.

and less BUTTOCKS.

But plenty of BRUSSELS SPROUTS.

I will never allow myself to seem immature when I am discussing dildos. Never.

tig, I’m pretty sure the PENIS is omnipresent in Lifetime movies. An immanent malicious force of oppression, and poking and prodding, also.

you’re an immature, humorless dildo.

Accurate.

Penises are being issued by size? How do they expect male infants, who have yet to learn math let alone weights and measures, to make an informed decision? I certainly would have spoken up sooner had I known.

‘Humorless’ is how Hitch excuses away whiskey dick and the observation it purports to represent is based on a stereotype.

That’s fine, alec, but you can’t just look at what is said. You have to take into account the person making the speech act and the person(s) to whom it is addressed. In this case, it’s just Hitch being his usual dickish self. In Jennifer’s case, I’ve read enough of her posts to know that she is an egalitarian in good faith, and she wasn’t using ‘humourless’ in your definition (c), but probably closer to your definition (a).

poking and prodding humorless dildos.

Sweet marinara, that is NEVER going to get old.

you’re an immature, humorless dildo.

Who is Sean Hannity? I’ll stick with Fox News Hosts for $600, Alex.

St. Trotsky, we’ve just been dorking around waiting for YOU.

Oh no, my trigger! Dorks are the worst possible word you can say about the PENIS.

Also, SHMUCK.

yeah, well I will eat Pope brainz also.

Also, SHMUCK.

Putz.

And the ultimate insult, petz’l.

Oh, and HUY for you damn commie Russkie types out there.

Dorks are the worst possible word you can say about the PENIS.

I disagree.

What about flambee?

Or deep-fried?

Or how about MINCED?

granted, these words probably don’t seem as bad to HUMOURLESS FEMINISTS.

For the luvva pirates, I’m just making it worse, aren’t I?

Darth Revan, I said this before, but it bears repeating: awesome handle.

PENIS, also.

Oh, and HUY for you damn commie Russkie types out there.

This is a fundamental property of the Sino-Soviet split, or at least the stupid jokes cracked over it: the Chinese phrase for “socialism” has “huy” in it, and I’ve conjectured that there’s some special property about the Chinese language and/or dicks such that every other human language will find its preferred word for “penis” in common use in China.

That’s fine, alec, but you can’t just look at what is said. You have to take into account the person making the speech act and the person(s) to whom it is addressed. In this case, it’s just Hitch being his usual dickish self. In Jennifer’s case, I’ve read enough of her posts to know that she is an egalitarian in good faith, and she wasn’t using ‘humourless’ in your definition (c), but probably closer to your definition (a).

Sure. I’m assuming good faith here, I’m just saying that the trope is a big deal and ought to be avoided.

Also, that accusing people who don’t find you funny of having no sense of humor is for cowards. Per Wikipedia:

Comedian Dane Cook was heckled on his album “Retaliation”, in the middle of a story about Burger King, where the heckler yelled, “Make it happen, man! Make it happen!” Dane replied, “Shut up! You’re ruining the show for everyone around you. Don’t do that.” The heckler kept going, and Dane replied, “Shut the fuck up, or I’ll have you kicked out of here!”

(I’m sorry, that doesn’t really have anything to do with the discussion, I just like that Dane Cook responds to mild heckling with petulant whining. It fits, you know?)

and she just stands there as he walks up close enough to start hitting her with his arms as they pinwheel and says, “Gee, those PENIS ARMS sure do HURT, don’t they?”

Fuck, that just triggered me.

All sorts of exceptions were made to immigration laws for Cuban refugees (mostly middle-class pigs of European descent who lost their chance to fuck over the poorer, mostly African population, most of whom were perfectly happy to stay in Cuba once some of the Euros left) & Vietnamese refugees (probably rightfully scared of being dealt w/ by the victorious Vietnamese in reaction to their siding w/ the colonialists, from Frogs to Yankees, & probably mostly Catholic).

No recollection of who was in charge of the Congress when these exceptions were made.

Do PENIS arms stick up in the air when you wake up in the morning?

Yep. The Chinese word for socialism is she4 hui4 zhu3 yi4 – I’ve also heard the bad Russian jokes about the Chinese use of hui (in all tones).

Sure. I’m assuming good faith here, I’m just saying that the trope is a big deal and ought to be avoided.

Well, if that’s all, then I think we’re in agreement. It’s probably better to say ‘unfunny’ or ‘dour’ than ‘humourless’ anyway.

Well, if that’s all, then I think we’re in agreement. It’s probably better to say ‘unfunny’ or ‘dour’ than ‘humourless’ anyway.

Well, no, I disagree. I am sorry. But there is a HUGE difference between “unfunny” and “humorless.” And “dour” is a whole ‘nother category.

Jeff Goldstein = unfunny.

George Will = humorless.

Dick Cheney = dour (to say the least)

Thanks, Djur! I find it particularly useful whenever Big Hollywood is brought up.

I actually think ‘pathetic’ is a better descriptor for George Will’s nits than ‘humourless’.

tigrismus is a funny fucker.

I find it hurtful.
Jeff Goldstein = unfunny.

Dick Cheney = EEEVIL HUMORLESS DILDO

FTFY, free of charge. But if you happen to have a few spair branes….

alec – I come here because I don’t feel like things have to be “avoided”.

I don’t go out of my way to be a dick about it, or to try to piss off someone who might be reading, but just to say what I’m thinking. If I enjoyed or found useful the constant minding of Ps and Qs, I wouldn’t be here, I’d be over there.

Though on second thought, no, I still wouldn’t be over there. Because the corollary to avoiding certain words or phrases is avoiding different ideas. And that shit is boring.

What that means is from time to time I’m gonna say some shit that various people don’t like and they’re going to take offense. Shit happens. It’s not the fucking end of the world.

Humorless people dislike this old joke from Redd Foxx:

Why do I say “shit” and “fuck”? Because people do.

If you’ve never fucked, shiiit.

If you’ve never shit, fuuuuuck…

you’re an immature, humorless dildo.

The mature dildos smell funny.

http://www.talkingpointsmemo.com/images/gallery-cpactwo1.jpg

The mature dildos smell funny.

not if you clean ’em with a little neutral anti-bac soap…..

FYWP. Here is a picture.

Humorless feminists are the dildoes of Liberal Fascism.

#

Snorghagen said,

July 15, 2009 at 2:41 (kill)

I think folks everywhere would get along much better if they all just settled down in their easy chairs and remembered that each and every person in this whacky, wonderful world is a sorry-ass piece of shit except me.

Yes, what snroggy said.

realizing, of course, that he is a humorless dildo.
‘
good DAWG that is not gonna get old!!

alec – I come here because I don’t feel like things have to be “avoided”.

And Troofus is here because he doesn’t feel like the truth about black people’s IQ has to be “avoided”. Can we drop the anti-censorship crusader bullshit, please? Neither I nor anyone else is saying you or HTML or whoever have to do anything. You can prance around wearing a swastika and accusing Obama of 9/11 for all I fucking care, it’s still something you shouldn’t do, because you are presumably a grown adult with certain standards.

not if you clean ‘em with a little neutral anti-bac soap…..

You are doing it incorrectly!! BLEACH! Esp. if Mr. Magic Wand has more than one friend w/ benefits. Or batteries. (Though the fabulous Magic Wand plugs right into the wall.)

Is the opposite of a humourless dildo a hysterical dildo?

Someday, I’ma gonna write a zombie movie.

In one of the inevitable horde scenes, I’m gonna have a random zombie extra shambling by, trying to eat a dildo and not really getting why that isn’t working out.

NOM NOM NOM Zzwrwrwzzrwrwr NOM NOM NOM Bzwrwzzrwrwrwr NOM NOM NOM Zerwrwrwzzwrwrwrr…

Everyone here will get a Producer credit.

Except Bubba.

Jesus fuck.

You’re obviously morally better than I am.

Congratulations, and good night.

You are doing it incorrectly!! BLEACH!

That is what they have J-List for, you horrible, horrible man.

Is the opposite of a humourless dildo a hysterical dildo?

I’m given to understand that things passing the cervix is like a more painful, enveloping version of whacking your humerus on something, so yes, yes it is.

I believe Mr, Bouffant has a weird idea about the effect of leftover bleachicles on nether reaches, especially in the case of a, let’s say, VIGOROUS use of mr. humorless dildo…..

maybe there needs to be a brain intervention. Or at least a meeting at the midpoint, say somewhere around Mr. Mencken’s ‘secret’ fields?

You’re obviously morally better than I am.

So I’m either censoring you or lecturing you. I suppose next I’ll be ignoring your small-town values.

What I’m getting at here is that you’re being dishonest as a way of avoiding being catty blowing up in your face. Don’t fucking do that, because it makes you look like a brittle prick and I’m presuming from past experience you aren’t.

Now can we please get back to the revelation that Cuba Gooding Junior is a Republican and a dyke? Did not see that coming.

ahh, fuckin humorless dildos, now we scared Jennifer off…..

Everyone here will get a Producer credit.

Except Bubba.

!!!

FYWP!

I don’t know about humorless dildoes, but last night at Target, while perusing the housewares department, I spied an old friend of mine from shopping trips of yore. “Look! They still have Steely Dan!” I cried. My friend turned and beheld it in all its glory: A large, stainless steel paper towel holder, with a thick shaft and slightly bulbous head. I tells ya, I never get tired of seeing that menacing shaft, lording it over the “pretty” paper towel holders surrounding it.

I always wonder if I’m the only one who’s noticed what that thing looks like? My friend thinks so. I myself think any Burroughs fan would immediately pick up on it . . . so to speak.

I will NOT feel succesful until one of the Sadly posters uses “Humourless Dildo” (including British spellin) in a post title.

Plus, FYWP. Just because you have NEVERZ told me I’m posting too fast. fzucking pro-zombie coding.

What’s a feminist’s favorite baseball team?

The Orioles.

realizing, of course, that he is a humorless dildo.

Not true! I am a silly, giggling dildo.

Candy should have been here in this thread WAAAAYYYY earlier.

but i can’t think of a more humorless dildo than one who had to live in Target. Paging Lileks!!

Meanwhile, pro-lifers are angry that someone in the White House might have a sense of humor.

Newsflash: fetus lovers fear humorous dildos.

A dildo with arms. In Dildo.

kingubu said,

NOM NOM NOM Zzwrwrwzzrwrwr NOM NOM NOM Bzwrwzzrwrwrwr NOM NOM NOM Zerwrwrwzzwrwrwrr…

you are a very talented person.

But humorless, of course.

A humorless dildo with arms, in Dildo, Newfoundland.

zombie, I read the whole thread. I’m so conflicted! And now it’s bedtime. That’s an hour or two of my life etc.

NOM NOM NOM Zzwrwrwzzrwrwr N

this is worthy of Don Martin, truly.

where are you hangin out tonight? Cuz I’m not hungry or anything…

Ooh, sudden surprise flameout!

Yeah, those always leave me breathless on the edge of my seat, wondering whzzz zzz zzz zzz zzz zzz zzz zzz zzz… oops.

Sorry about that … actually, it just so happens that I have the secret solution that can make everyone on both sides happy as pigs in shit, but I’m too tired right now to write about that.

A humorless dildo with arms, in Dildo.

Fuck you, WordPress.

I just dropped in from the programming Reddit and I’m shocked, SHOCKED I SAY to find that humourless dildo is not, in fact, the newest OO hyperlambda strongly typed typeless parallel paradigm. Coz, it really should be.

It should be pointed out that the use of ‘humorless’ in conjunction with ‘dildos’ is offensive to many rubber novelty devices.

#

Do PENIS arms stick up in the air when you wake up in the morning?

yeah, but if they do you’re still good with Republican Jesus as long as you don’t touch them or look at them

his is worthy of Don Martin, truly.

You should see the way my feet bend.

Jennifer said,

Jesus fuck.

but I betcha he’s not humourless about it….

That is what they have J-List for

Jewish dating service?

I spend a few days in aeroplanes and miss a visit from GW. Damnit.
In honour of humourless dildi, here’s Tintin’s origin story as a Roman phallic symbol.

Somebody asked for a smiling dildo?

I rate for Gentlewoman.

For I can smile, and stimulate as I smile

As a feminist and sexual assault survivor, I can say this: nothing triggers me more than self-righteous controllers, whatever they feel like they need to police and be “safe” from.

Thank God the world and the internet contains people like HTML and Jennifer, or I’d never have learned to use humor to, you know, deal with life.

Look…I came here for an argument.

You should see the way my feet bend.
OMFSM, Kingubu = Xolotl!

Aw hell, I missed the fireworks.

I could have shared my story about saying something tacky about libertarians on HighClearing. Ouch!

Look, can’t we just all agree that Scott Stapp is a humorless dildo?

Jewish dating service?

You were expecting maybe Sora Aoi?

Look…I came here for an argument.

No you didn’t

Holy Pasta, Cheese and Rice!

I kept my promise, though. Shut up faster than a Mexican at a … whoopsie, don’t mean to offend.

For the record, I no longer visit Shakesville, not because of their viewpoints, but because they are incredibly fucking boring. Humorless, if you will. And the stuff that is meant as humor, is incredibly unfunny.

The above is not meant as an attack against any particular member of the Shakesville Community, but rather as my own observation and experience.

Don’t get me started on the undead, though…

Aw hell, I missed the fireworks.

I could have shared my story about saying something tacky about libertarians on HighClearing. Ouch!

Jean Luc Picard!

For the record, I no longer visit Shakesville, not because of their viewpoints, but because they are incredibly fucking boring. Humorless, if you will. And the stuff that is meant as humor, is incredibly unfunny.

It’s a different kind of humour. Doesn’t mean I like it. I used to post there pretty regularly, but then they had the DNS attacks and Melissa got her hat handed to her by Edwards and after that, they lost a bit off the fastball.

Was it something I said?

OK, look. I was trying to riff off of what I perceived as Cindy Yockey’s perhaps overly-eager co-option of Brand Lesbian by writing the most over-the-top Dyketty Dyke Dyke McDykeperson response that I could. It’s possible that I may have offended (or, as the kids seem to be saying these days, “triggered”) someone. Apologies if and as necessary.

Speaking of Dyketty &c., check out her latest, which not only includes a title nod to us truly, but also this gem (after yet another heroic C&P of an old rant from some frothing anti-Obama preacher):

I can’t say I’m crazy about Pastor Manning’s denunciation of homosexuality. But I very much admire his courage…

Somewhere, Hothead Paisan sharpens her axe.

BTW, Djur, I don’t think you were ever properly recognized for the following bit of brilliance:

Jennifer, it’s central to my point that you would find the idea of a young girl being battered with PENIS amusing, and may god save you, &c.

Well done!

Thanks, Jennifer. No hard feelings, I trust.

HTML Mencken: “Yeah, well I’m offended. The person who mattered most to me in my life was a vet with extreme PTSD. Don’t tell me I don’t care about such things…”

Why the big emotional reaction? It’s just words. As you keep insisting, no one can possibly ever need protection from any combination of words. The way you talk, you’d think that words represent ideas, and that some of those ideas can cause emotional reactions. Next you might realize that for some traumatized people, words can (oh no, not this word!) trigger reactions like panic attacks. And then you might reconsider your opinion.

HTML: “Put your offended energy into bashing the VA, etc, for not taking better care of these people”

Yes, we should take better care of veterans and trauma survivors. But I find it puzzling that you claim to believe it’s wrong for those people to try to find or make safe places on the internet to connect with other survivors while they’re in the process of recovering.

HTML: “I think it’s stupid, impractical, and morally retarded to seriously attempt to create places on the freaking internet where such people need to be protected from stray *words*.”

Morally retarded? Is that really what you believe? Because the lack of compassion here is unreal. If someone told your friend with PTSD that he should just suck it up and quit acting like he has a mental health issue, because shut up is why… I can’t imagine you’d be okay with that. But that’s basically the attitude that you’re displaying toward survivors who have the misfortune to be triggered sometimes by words.

You appear to be claiming that if a person has suffered a trauma like rape, and due to that, reacts with panic attacks to words graphically describing rape, there should be nowhere at all on the Internet where that person can go to connect with other human beings… apparently just because the creation of safe spaces annoys HTML Mencken. No one should even try to make a forum with some rules so that traumatized people can find social connection and safety online – because it offends your principles that someone, somewhere, is moderately restricting speech.

I just don’t see how you could really believe that.

PENIS HUMORLESS DILDO STORY

Once upon a time I answered the phones for the office, back when people answered phones. And I got a call from the local post office (Note that this took place after Sept 2001).

“We have a package for one of your people [a male person who was out of town at the time] and it’s buzzing,” the postal person said. “WHAT?? What do you want me to do?” I asked, alarmed. “Come pick it up,” the postman suggested airily.

Well, I did go pick it up. I opened it up on the spot and in it was a chrome vibrator, vibrating. And a pair of really immense red & black patent platform shoes. I turned off the vibrator, I taped the box back up, I took it to the office and left it on the person’s chair…and I never said a word about it.

I regret that to this day.

just don’t see how you could really believe that.

Mostly because that’s not what he said.

Westie – you might have a point if Mencken had said what you interpret he said. He didn’t. He expressed a loathing for the idea that people have to be protected from certain types of words or word constructions which he obviously finds stultifying. He never said that sites that impose these types of rules shouldn’t be allowed to exist, just that he thinks they’re bullshit. And you know what? That’s his opinion and this is his website where of all places he should be free to fully express it.

But let’s go back to your initial comment – you know, the one where you said: “Right on! If you have PTSD, no internet for you! Because people who have been traumatized to the point that some words and images cause flashbacks and panic attacks… those folks don’t deserve any consideration, anywhere, ever.”

Your implication in that statement is that unless we all agree to mind our Ps & Qs, on every site, people with PTSD can’t use the internet. And I quite rightly called bullshit on that. While I have no doubt that there are some fragile souls out there that cannot handle the rough-and-tumble of certain internet sites, the solution is for them to avoid going to those sites, not for the rest of us to walk around on eggshells.

But let’s go back to your last comment: “You appear to be claiming that if a person has suffered a trauma like rape, and due to that, reacts with panic attacks to words graphically describing rape, there should be nowhere at all on the Internet where that person can go to connect with other human beings… apparently just because the creation of safe spaces annoys HTML Mencken. No one should even try to make a forum with some rules so that traumatized people can find social connection and safety online – because it offends your principles that someone, somewhere, is moderately restricting speech.”

As was already pointed out, that’s not what Mencken said. He expressed the idea that he finds “safe places” to be bullshit. That’s what’s known as an opinion. You may not agree with it, but it’s not the same thing as him prohibiting those types of sites from existing – it’s just the expression of a personal preference, something that we all have. To his credit, he expresses that opinion here on his own blog – while also allowing you to disagree with it – something you would not be allowed to do on many of those “safe spaces.” It would be different if he went to those “safe spaces” on a regular basis to tell them their standards are full of shit. He doesn’t do that.

Last of all, I’d just like to point out that while you bring up issues of PTSD, rape trauma & etc., the “trigger” that caused this entire discussion was the use of two words together that on certain websites are never allowed to be used together: “humorless” and “feminists”. You may disagree that the construction was accurate, and that’s fine. But I challenge you to provide even one example in which that phrase would “trigger” a “flashback” for a victim of PTSD or a rape survivor. I’m sorry, but that, again, is BULLSHIT. What it “triggers” is opprobrium at using a phrase considered in some circles to be “politically incorrect” because it’s been used by people we don’t like in the past – therefore, it’s “bad” and should never be uttered by anyone on “our side” – even if it happens to be accurate.

There’s a big damn difference between using a word construction that offends someone’s sense of political correctness and one that causes a PTSD flashback. And sorry, but MY opinion is that to make such a big fucking deal over the use of the former – up to equating it with the latter – is just more bullshit. I said something that some people didn’t like. I didn’t retract it, and I’m not going to because in the context it was used I considered it (and still do consider it) to be accurate. If certain other people have a problem with that, well then, that’s their problem. They can’t expect that our opinions will be 100% in alignment on all matters, and if that’s their standard for judging who is a good, or reasonable, or acceptable person, they need to grow the fuck up.

so in sum:

Jennifer and HTML want a safe space where they can randomly ridicule Shakesville et al even (especially?) when it’s off topic. And caring about people’s feelings is less important than the US’s killing of people and the VA’s shitty health care. And HTML loves baseball.

And caring about people’s feelings is less important than the US’s killing of people and the VA’s shitty health care.

I’m having a hard time imagining a scenario in which that statement would be incorrect, so…yes. If by “caring about people’s feelings” you mean perpetually walking on eggshells and apologizing even when you don’t feel like an apology is in order.

it’s not that it’s incorrect, it’s that it’s a cheap rhetorical dodge by HTML.

I can’t speak for HTML other than by referring to what he’s already said, but the gist of that seemed, to me, to be something on the order of “claiming that you are damaged by words to an extent that certain words are off-limits is making a mountain out of a molehill and it’s not a standard that I agree to adhere to.” My tendency is to agree with that idea. I don’t consider it a “cheap dodge” to say what you think – the issue here is that you don’t agree with what he (and I) think on this topic. It happens.

I just don’t see how
Put your offended energy into bashing the VA, etc, for not taking better care of these people, rather than wasting it trying to police the internet. Christ.

can possibly be interpreted to mean what you say Jennifer. The purpose is/seems an attempt to shame people into shutting up b/c there are more important things to focus on, which I think is a cheap dodge.

Context is everything, Kathleen. Especially when you’ve got people commenting on how some people won’t be able to use the internet at all if we don’t watch what we say here. Again I can’t speak for him but that’s what I take away from it – “don’t waste your time coming here and complaining about a phrase you say hurts your feelings – your identity politics are not more important than someone else’s right to freely express their opinion on this site. And here are some other things that are more important as well.” It’s not “shut up”; it’s “get over yourself”. My interpretation, anyway.

It’s not “shut up”; it’s “get over yourself”. My interpretation, anyway.

That’s how I read it as well: “Don’t go looking to be offended”. I read Panagon a lot; used to read a lot of Shakesville. I almost *never* make a comment at those places, and even then not without a lot of trying to make sure any comment cannot be reasonably construed to be a dig at somebody. I do my best to respect their space. That being said, I am grateful there are places where I can make tacky jokes, and I say that as someone who has been banned on Wonkette of all places (I have since be reinstated).

People can choose to be offended at anything – and it is just that, a choice. I find it particularly galling because Conservatives have taken “political correctness”, originally a product of liberal “good” (albeit naive) intentions, and turned it against us (e.g. “The War On Christmas”). That may be why it gets HTML’s goat so badly; I know with certainty it annoys the hell out of me, much more so than the straight up racism of Redstate or Free Republic. The latter is obvious and much more easily combatted than the more insidious “hurting of feelings”.

I’ll say my piece now that this thread’s dead. I’ll never relinquish my own boundless contempt for Shakesville and Alas A Blog because I see them trivializing a horrifying psychiatric disorder that is already considered a joke among too many mental health providers. I am also one of “them” but they don’t speak for me. I find their safe spaces emotionally damaging, counterproductive toward recovery and easing re-traumatization and getting over it and shit.

I used to get triggered to where you couldn’t take me anywhere, diving under tables in restaurants and staying frozen under desks til the office cleared out, talking in a little baby voice or becoming violent and fighting with store clerks or some innocent who bumped me in passing. That’s PTSD. You lose the in between space that separates stimulus and response. Normally it’s stimulus>>thought>>response but when PTSD exists there’s nothing between the two, and there really needs to be; the ability to recognize and accurately perceive a stimulus is basic and that’s what PTSD ruins. When the stimulus/response is instantaneous, it’s impaired. People living with unresolved major trauma put current experience into the past and act as if a horrible thing is happening now and they don’t realize they’re doing this. They don’t know where they are. To be unable to tell when sounds/behaviors/facial expressions/ and yes, words are a threat or benign is hell to live with, it needs to be repaired and there are ways of doing that.

Everyone I know who has sincerely worked on healing from trauma would laugh at the very fucking idea of a “safe space”, because number one we are beyond safe spaces, and second, trying to create a womblike social milieu promotes the continuing psychosis we’re trying to get over.

Recovery is about learning to discern the difference between a benign and threatening stimuli, and how to respond to each accordingly. This is broken in PTSD where everything is coming at you and all of it potentially threatening. Reactions to sounds, words, facial expressions, ringing phones and knocks on the door are often unpredictable, bizarre, disproportionate, hysterical, confusing, scary to experience and scary to witness, and come out of nowhere with a life of their own. The triggers are real, and the material being activated is meaningful, but it’s all happening inside, and that’s where the responsibility lies. Why is that so hard to grasp? I read those blogs and their trigger warnings and PTSD admonishments to everyone as if their speech is a factor in keeping the self-identified PTSD sufferer stable. Maybe the sufferer should be disturbed; PTSD is a serious mental illness.

Good therapy would have you re-engaging with life in all its noisome messiness and ambiguity, none of which carries a trigger warning. Being upset and staying with it. Building tolerance, getting stronger. But you have to pass through so much catastrophe without externalizing it, and that’s hard. Easier to say it’s you, Mencken, you’ve put me back in that horrible place I need to forget and you had better not ever do that again. But now I’ve abandoned me and made you the thing that needs attention. This is why I think what they do is so anti-therapeutic. Plus it’s lazy, no need for commitment to learning how to handle it, and the craziness is very difficult to overcome. The first step has to be in identifying who it belongs to, and I’ve yet to see an inkling of self-responsibility at those safe space blogs. It infuriates me that they’re so silly and superficial about what PTSD takes from people, and how they will ameliorate the damage with clever, wordy, linear debates about insensitive speech. I don’t see it. PTSD is a disorder, it creates disordered personalities, jumbled discourse, irrational paragraphs, regular meltdowns, if you have PTSD issues and you post regularly at a blog it’s going to show. They insult people who really do struggle with chronic re-traumatization by presenting themselves as what that looks like. And by arguing that recovery is about suppressing particular stimuli rather than confronting what it is that particular stimuli activates within. The triggers start something inside. We can ignore the words that started the process. It’s my mind at issue, not what goes on in yours. If we’re talking about PTSD, which is totalizing. I don’t know what to make of it, certain female-oriented bloggers exploit a faddish disorder to legitimize garden variety irritants and use it to prop up their absolute moralism? Shocking.