I love the new Townhall discussion section. Each comment has a “report to moderator” function. It appears to work even if you’re not registered, so I amuse myself tattling on the various participants with reports like:

– This commenter is a moron
– This commenter sounds fat
– This commenter is probably wearing a white hood and robe while typing
– This commenter’s a freakin’ closet case who’s probably imagining right now what it’s like to have 6 cocks up his up back passage right now…sick pervert!!!

It’s gratifying to then see “comment reported” after each submission.

I’ve started the entirely gimmicky practice at my site of awarding a hypothetical plate of weiners to the finest example of Townhall hackery each Wednesday, which provides the bulk of my local paper’s op-eds through the weekend.

Last week’s inaugural winner, Michael Fumento — who apparently has a little time on his hands lately — stopped by and made some brief words of thanks (or something roughly to that effect), but I think Mike S. Adams ought to win this week’s weiners, but that’s just me:

Shorter Mike S. Adams: Feminists are worse than dingoes, who want to eat your babies, but are not racists, do not oppose the war in Iraq and hold no objection to sexist jokes in the workplace. Also, dingoes would not vote for Bill Clinton.

And, yeah, the Townhall comments are a treasure trove of hilarity.

Hey, Linda is stealing from Renew America’s Guy Adams, who said “In ‘Will and Grace,’ we have what NBC describes as a ‘light-hearted drama,’ but let’s imagine–just what does Will actually do with his boyfriends?” I hope her syndicate drops her for this, and picks up Guy instead, because he seems to know a lot more about the homosexual menace.

The sad thing is that Chavez’s column isn’t so much about Will and Grace, but rather about how Hollywood can’t keep people’s attentions. Will and Grace is thrown in at the end as if to say “Wait! Why is nobody reading about how fake presidents are only fun when Clinton’s in office and how us women are too simple to be president? Um… WILL AND GRACE = TEH EVIL!!1”

Buy me for $1! It’s money well-spent — the guy who wrote me is sure of it!

Actually, I want Thomas Sowell’s CRT-lookin’ glasses. I’ll bet his eyes are actually closed behind them, like in that Rodney Dangerfield movie.

Shit, I hear ya about the week at the office, except my exodus would be a grand finale quitting/forced resignation. I’m really getting tired of the assholes I work with.

This is very subtle, so pay attention: when the Republicans are in power, it’s treasonable to be against the government. However, when the Democrats are in power, it’s actually anti-american to support the government. I know it’s complicated, but do try to remember so we don’t have to come round to your house to ‘remind’ you..

Considering that sleep was a un-recommended option for me at University, let me share these two goodies from the steaming Townhall dump that were hi-larious:

The pirates of profit
by Ryan Krueger and Mike Catalano – Jan 25, 2006
Demand destruction is part of the answer for our energy crisis and needs no tax, simply an open and free market, which works flawlessly if left alone.

So flawlessly, it doesn’t need any of those “laws” and “ethics” and “oversight” like those commies in England. Remember God’s plan for CEOs: what would Stossel do?

Why I don’t take feminists seriously, part II
by Mike S. Adams – Jan 25, 2006
After I published yesterday’s column, a feminist who works in my building really gave me the cold shoulder. In fact, she didn’t say a word to me all day. It was meant to be a form of punishment. But, actually, it was a reward.

I’m starting to think that it’s not so much that Dr. Mike Adams has eurotophobia; it seems to be more that he’s an antisocial woman-hating fussbudget.

But because we love him anyway, there’s help!

So, that’s what that’s called!

Shorter Thomas Sowell: If congressment were really really rich, they’d be incorruptible.

Yep, exactly how it works in real life.

“Most” people could live for life on $60 million???
What is Sowell getting paid?