Freud, Much?

Roger L. Simon:

Nevertheless, Mark Sanford’s out-of-control Father’s Day jaunt to Buenos Aires is particularly ill-timed, not just because of the obvious disrespect to his wife, children, friends, citizens of his state, political party, etc.

Reason: IRAN.

At this moment, the eyes of this country should be fixed on the horrific events coming from that company and the struggle for freedom against all odds by many of its brave citizens.

Well, the Green Revolution is a wholly owned subsidiary of Wingnutz, Inc., after all.

 

Comments: 249

 
 
 

Country, company … in 10 years (maybe less) there won’t be any difference anyway.

 
 

Iran, Inc.

MOTTO: Iran so far away.

 
 

United Corporations of America, that’s us.

 
Dragon-King Wangchuck
 

We should be focused on Iran all the frigging time.

MOTTO: Iran both night and day.

 
I Cried My Heart Out For Want Of My Love
 

I thought corporations were classed as individual people.

 
 

It pains me to admit this, but for once, RogerHell and I agree on something.

 
 

The fact is, the Mark Sanford scandal was invented by the Democrat Party and Sanford, who is actually a RINO, to distract America from the real story: Transformers 2, which is a complete repudiation of Obama’s appeasement foreign policy. If Obama was president in the movie, we would have surrendered to the Decepticons.

 
 

We should be focused on Iran all the frigging time.

MOTTO: Iran both night and day.

Sanford couldn’t wait to get away…

*cool synth lick here*

 
 

Funny, too, how Hat Dork never demanded that ‘the eyes of this country should be fixed’ on the Saffron Revolution.

 
 

Hunh? The primary problem with Mark Sanford going AWOL is that ‘Murkins are thus not thinking of Iran all the time?

Because if (and only if) Americans think positive thoughts about Iran all the time, then the situation will improve?

I thought we liberals were supposed to be the ooshy-gooshy-touchy-feelly bleeding heart types.

 
 

All hail Sanford, hail to thee, Thane of Shiraz!

Oh wait, you’ve been fucking around with that Argentinian whore haven’t you?

 
 

Q: Why is the Iranians dying?

A: Obama Mark Sanford

 
 

cool synth lick here*

From the Urban Dictionary, yesterday:

brown chicken, brown cow

An onomatopaeic imitation of the guitar riff commonly heard in 1970’s porn movies.
Jim: “Hey, where are Abby and Jake?”
Tom: “Brown chicken, brown cow.”

So maybe this whole Argentinian junket could be writtenoff as an agricultural exchange program?

 
 

An onomatopaeic imitation of the guitar riff commonly heard in 1970’s porn movies.
Jim: “Hey, where are Abby and Jake?”
Tom: “Brown chicken, brown cow.”

Bwawkmoo? Huh?

 
Dragon-King Wangchuck
 

as if Edwards and Clinton were good for the Democratic Brand – unless that brand is serial adultery.

Nice. Edwards and Clinton.

Newt
Larry Craig
David Vitter
Vince Fosella
The entire GOP Presidential candidate list minus teh Mittster
Bob Allen
Don Sherwood

List is by no means comprehensive, but quite reprehensible. And this is just elected GOPpers – Let’s not forget Neil Bush, Loofah Bill, Big Pharma or Pray Out The Ghey Haggard.

 
 

“Brown chicken, Brown cow”

Say it out loud: bow-chick-a-BOW-wow

Porn music.

I thought it was hilarious.

Never mind, I’ll get back to work now.

 
 

Oh wait, you’ve been fucking around with that Argentinian whore haven’t you? – Righteous Bubba

Did you hear that? They called me a whore. They actually called me a whore.
It’s an easy mistake, they still called me an admiral, yet I gave up the sea … long ago.

(Lines from the play about a former entertainer turned politician, Ronald Reagan Eva Peron)

 
 

Let’s not forget […] Big Pharma – Dragon-King Wangchuck

Now those allegations about me wanking off two Dominican boys with one hand tied behind my back, while impressive if I do say so myself, have not yet been proven. I thought you liberals believed in “innocent until proven guilty”. I guess you only believe that for terrorists in Gitmo but not for every day, hillbilly heroin addicted Americans like me. ( / Lush Bimbaugh )

 
 

Say it out loud: bow-chick-a-BOW-wow

Porn music.

Oh, I got it. I just wanted to riff off it.

 
 

Sanford is being smeared because he was close to discovering the truth about Barack Obama’s Fake Birth Certificate!

 
 

This just in:

A merkin (first use 1617)[1] is a pubic wig, originally worn by prostitutes after shaving their genitalia. According to the American Heritage Dictionary of the English Language the term stems from an corruption of the obsolete word malkin, meaning a lower-class woman or mop, which is derived from a diminutive of the personal name Matilda.[2] The New Shorter Oxford English Dictionary concurs in this derivation.[3]

 
 

Help this Briton out. Was Sanford one of those righteous defence-of-marriage types who made public statements about the sanctity of marriage and stomped all over Clinton during the impeachment era?

 
 

Was Sanford one of those righteous defence-of-marriage types who made public statements about the sanctity of marriage and stomped all over Clinton during the impeachment era?

He voted to impeach on three of the four charges the House brought against Clinton.

 
 

Ah, so basically he is a hypocritical fuck and deserves to be pointed and laughed at.

 
 

I’ve given that a fair amount of thought, Percy. I can understand the instinct to do so, but it was eleven years ago. I wouldn’t want to be held accountable for something I did ten or eleven years ago, so I’m hesitant to do so in Sanford’s case.

But hey, feel free to take some swipes for me! 🙂

 
 

Hmmmm….I knew about the merkin, and also about the malkin (which I have seen defined as “a woman of the lower orders; a slattern; slut”) but I never knew there was an etymological connection between the two. Makes sense though for many years I’ve had a hard time wrapping my head around the whole idea of a merkin. Maybe it served primarily as a crab-catcher, though if the region was shaved, crabs wouldn’t be a problem anyway, would they?

Erg. I haven’t been able to wrap my head around a lot of other stuff either, such as thong underwear and the brazilian wax.

 
Because, Because, Because, Because, Because... Because Of The Wonderful Things The Goddamn Batman Does
 

Pay no attention to that man behind the curtain! Or his dusky Patagonian mistress. Or… say, I’ve never tried it that way before.

 
 

I wouldn’t want to be held accountable for something I did ten or eleven years ago…

Well, if it was just doing, that would be one thing. But when someone makes speeches from the well of the House, puts out press releases, shows up on talking head shows, etc., to belabor the point, I think scorn and ridicule is the least he should expect.

Personally, I’d like to see a little stoning. But only with little stones.

 
 

Personally, I’d like to see a little stoning. But only with little stones.

how about he gets a mocking while we get stoned….*ssssssssssssssssssssssssspfffffff*

Ohyea…that’s the stuff…

 
 

He has a razor-tipped boomeranging fedora, he does.

 
 

I wouldn’t want to be held accountable for something I did ten or eleven years ago…

Well, you know, neither would I.

But giving it some thought, I was never calling for Clinton’s head on a platter, because even back then, as a still relatively young woman, I knew how this stuff works. Sex and love and lust are things that quite a few of us either can’t or find very difficult to handle via rational thought processes or personal ideas of morality. They are our animal side, and like the animals we are, we can’t always predict how we will react when we get struck by that bolt from the blue. And who would have it otherwise? Take that away, and life becomes a lot less exciting.

On the other hand, there are a lot of things that I do know absolutely I would never do: cheat someone out of money to satisfy greed; molest or abuse a child; lie to someone about my feelings about them to make them believe I care when I don’t, etc. And had I condemned, loudly, publicly, and repeatedly someone else’s transgressions on those things 10 years ago, and then turned around and started doing them myself, I’d deserve whatever came my way and would quite expect it.

Which is exactly why I wouldn’t too loudly condemn in others those things that I know we are all prone to do…Sanford was actually MORE wrong for what he did 11 years ago than he is now, IMHO, because then he was demanding of others a standard that for all too many is unattainable or unsupportable, and holding himself out as somehow being above succumbing to the temptations of mere mortal men by doing so. That’s not saying that what he did was RIGHT…just that we can better understand how this kind of thing could happen than we can for someone to make the premeditated, conscious decision to rip into others for behavior that’s really just part of the basic human toolkit.

 
 

Jennifer, I think that’s pretty much my point: I’d rather get these bastards on substantive arguments than on their human flaws, including being a hypocrite.

If there was one thing I wish I could do in American politics, apart from getting money out of the system, would be to sit both sides, right and left, down, and hammer out an agreement that a politician’s family life, sexual preferences, and moral turpitudes like drinking or gambling, are forever off limits, since both sides are as corrupt as the other.

And this I think, or at least hope, is Roger Hell’s point. We have massive crises facing us now, unlike back in the 90s when things were pretty OK, economically and militarily speaking at any rate. I’d rather focus on fixing the problems that really matter to you and I and the average American than tying up the national attention on this stuff.

 
 

You know, I’m kinda with the wingnuts w/r/t Sanford’s Appalachian Hike being a distraction. Of course, they’re saying that because he’s they’re guy, and their focus on Iran is hardly the stuff of humanitarian concerns, but hey. Strange bedfellows and all.

 
 

I could shorter all of that with the words of the immortal Larry Flynt – and it’s too bad you aren’t all here because I do a kick-ass imitation of Larry Flynt delivering this line – just imagine if you will:

It’s not about the sex, Geraldo. It’s about the hypocrisy.

 
 

Jennifer, I think that’s pretty much my point: I’d rather get these bastards on substantive arguments than on their human flaws, including being a hypocrite.

They believe that what you do with your genitals is a substantive argument. It’s worth it to call them on it because they may one day end up with a platform that recognizes humanity.

 
 

Mark Sanford on the issues

Voted YES on banning partial-birth abortions. (Apr 2000)
Voted YES on barring transporting minors to get an abortion. (Jun 1999)
No civil unions; define one-man-one-woman marriage. (Nov 2002)
Voted YES on banning gay adoptions in DC. (Jul 1999)
Voted YES on prohibiting needle exchange & medical marijuana in DC. (Oct 1999)
Use tax code to reinforce families. (Sep 1994)

http://irregulartimes.com/index.php/archives/2009/06/24/mark-sanford-governor-of-black-pots-and-kettles/
“As Jenny and I are the parents of four little boys, we’ve always taught our kids that marriage was something between a man and a woman. As governor, I am supportive of legislation that furthers that definition here in South Carolina.” — Republican Governor Mark Sanford to the Post and Courier, February 2004

 
 

Somehow I’m not surprised that CEO Roger Simon has the words “company” and “struggle” on his mind.

 
 

It’s worth it to call them on it because they may one day end up with a platform that recognizes humanity.

Can’t disagree with that.

 
 

Well, we can all agree to disagree, and I respect the position that this matters to a degree.

All I’m going to say, to sum up my position, is if you ever wonder why no one of any real substance and intellect ever runs for political office, someone who could actually do the job and fix the problem, look no further than our reaction to Mark Sanford and the right’s reaction to (fill in the next Democrat with his pecker on display).

Also, PENIS. Also.

 
 

Frikkin’ tags…

 
 

Simon:

At this moment, the eyes of this country should be fixed on the horrific events coming from that company and the struggle for freedom against all odds by many of its brave citizens.

Yes. And what if Khameini had suddenly recognized the error of his violent, suppressing ways, and had tried to contact the upstanding governor of South Carolina to fly to Iran to arbitrate an agreement between the regime and the protestors about having another election with U.N. observers. First he’d get fobbed off with lame stories about him going off to write while hiking the Appalachian Trail, then motoring the coast of Argentina. Then he’d be sucker-punched with the truth about Sanford’s adulterous life, and his hatred of American immorality would come rushing back, and he’d remember why he can’t give an inch to western influence.

Yep, Sanford could have ruined the Green Revolution all by himself.

 
Ted the Slacker
 

Stupid Sanford. Should have realized that he could have slept with a Persian and all would have been forgiven.

 
 

Stupid Sanford. Should have realized that he could have slept with a Persian and all would have been forgiven.

One of my college girlfriends was Iranian…does this inoculate me against all further morals charges? I can haz Presnidessy naow?

 
 

Our eyes should be fixed on Iran? Why the fuck should they? ‘Cause Fedora Guy sez? What exactly is going to happen while our eyes are fixed on Iran – Bibi’s going to pull two rabbits and the West Bank out of his sleeve?

 
 

Sex and love and lust are things that quite a few of us either can’t or find very difficult to handle via rational thought processes or personal ideas of morality. They are our animal side, and like the animals we are, we can’t always predict how we will react when we get struck by that bolt from the blue. And who would have it otherwise? Take that away, and life becomes a lot less exciting.

What do you mean ‘we can’t always predict how we will react’, Jennifer? We may be animals, but aren’t we animals of choice? To take this to its logical extreme, no one I know of would excuse a rapist who says, ‘I didn’t know I was going to do that, and I couldn’t help myself’ (except possibly insane wingnuts who think that because of the way they dress it’s women’s own fault they get raped).

I agree that we shouldn’t condemn people for their human flaws, but that’s no reason to whitewash them or to pretend that they can’t be helped.

 
 

…like a bolt out of the blue,
you never know who you will screwwwwwwwww….

 
 

What I find interesting is the right’s (lack of) reaction to Sanford going AWOL from his job for a week. Nobody seems to even care about that. Didn’t we learn in last year’s campaign that being a governor is a super important executive position that totally qualifies somebody to be president? Now all of a sudden it’s like some work-at-home thing. “I work only 3 days a month! I make over $1K a week in my bathrobe!”.

 
Ted the Slacker
 

One of my college girlfriends was Iranian…does this inoculate me against all further morals charges? I can haz Presnidessy naow?

Well, I once got Andre Agassi’s autograph and his dad’s of Iranian descent… so yeah, the presiduncy, I’ll spin you for it?

 
 

And of course, it’s not just the moral hypocrisy, but the fact that he was steadfastly, even indignantly, lying about the whole thing right up until it became unsustainable. If that reporter from The State hadn’t followed her hunch to stake out the airport (nice to see good old-fashioned journalism at work, ain’t it?), Sanford would have reappeared, fresh from a nice wholesome “hike on the Appalachian Trail”, with no one the wiser.

Then, if his clumsy, off-the-cuff lie about changing his mind at the last minute to take off for “exotic” Buenes Aires instead hadn’t unraveled like a Wal-mart sweater, he and his supporters would be all over anyone who dared to criticize such a stupid, impetuous move.

Now that the truth has finally been dragged into the open, the Republicans’ talkings points are, (1) Well at least he had the decency to admit his mistakes; (2) It’s a private matter between him and his family. It doesn’t affect his job or anything else, so any further criticism should be out of bounds! and (3) CLENIS!!!one1!!

What will they do when (not “if” mind you–when) it turns out that Sanford was using state-funded transportation to make his little junk-junkets. Was he putting his little senorita up in a finely appointed love-nest, maybe giving her a nice little stipend, a new car, jewelry? Did the fine, upstanding SC taxpayers finance the whole tawdry business? How will they defend him when that come out?

 
 

All I’m going to say, to sum up my position, is if you ever wonder why no one of any real substance and intellect ever runs for political office, someone who could actually do the job and fix the problem, look no further than our reaction to Mark Sanford and the right’s reaction to (fill in the next Democrat with his pecker on display).

I agree in theory. In practice, I’ve spent the last week mocking Sanford on topics that I feel are safely mockable: disappearing for a week without notifying the Lt Gov, being generally a right-wing hack, being too gutless to admit he’s running (was, now, I guess) in 2012 (imagine going through life more gutless than Jindal), and hiring aides stupid enough to believe that “the Appalachian Trail” on Hike Nude Day was a good cover story for anything.

 
59 Les Paul Copy
 

Iran is fermenting? When will it be ready to drink? I’m thinkin’ PARTAAAY!

 
 

What do you mean ‘we can’t always predict how we will react’, Jennifer?

Exactly what I said.

Who hasn’t met someone interesting while they were involved in a relationship and thought, “if I wasn’t already married/living with/involved with x, I’d go for that”?

Imagine that same situation, except when it happens, you’ve been in a loveless marriage or unsatisfactory relationship for the past year or more. You’ve not been getting any of the things people crave from the person you’re married to/living with/involved with. And you’ve missed it. And maybe some other stuff is going on too, with work or relatives or something else, and you’re under more stress from that. It becomes a lot easier to see how someone could slip up under those circumstances, and in fact, it happens all the time. Even to a lot of people who never believed they’d slip up.

Look, I personally have never been unfaithful to anyone I was with. But I can see how I might be if just the right set of circumstances came along. Because, as I said before, this stuff isn’t ruled so much by the rational mind. We keep it under control as much as we can – and some are better at it or simply never find themselves in circumstances that test them.

 
 

you’ve been in a loveless marriage…

Harrumph.

 
 

LP, you missed my comments about your ilk running wild on the freeway on Monday. I got stuck in that cluster for over an hour.

 
 

Jennifer’s right. If 50% of first marriages (the percentage is higher for second marriages) end up in divorce, then someone is somehow behaving in an unexpected way, whether it’s cheating on the spouse, or being emotionally or physically abusive.

It’s human to want to try to do better. It’s also human to fail miserably.

My observation on this point is that we spend so little time in pursuit of who we are. Society insists that it’s unimportant, that self-awareness and actualization are things best left to after the chips have fallen and you’re in couples counseling or psychotherapy, but then the price society pays for mental and emotional illness and/or weakness is often hidden to the point of being unrecognizable. It’s not easily measured by traditional yardsticks.

 
 

I replied much later….

Now think about what you wrote, young lady. Made me feel like a pig in a Polk-a.

 
 

Fair enough. I’m just saying that there’s always the choice to be made, not that it’s not understandable that someone might make the wrong one, or that the circumstances don’t matter. I’ve been in that same situation – a bad relationship – and had similar kinds of thoughts of ‘what if’ and ‘if only’, but I never felt that I didn’t have a choice in the matter of what I did.

 
 

but I never felt that I didn’t have a choice in the matter of what I did.

Does that statement not strike you as a bit sanctimonious?

 
 

I would even go so far as to suggest that a lot of people cheat precisely for the reason that it will precipitate the end of an unsatisfactory relationship, whether it’s a conscious decision or a subconscious one. Lots of people are wusses about ending things. An affair is both an escape hatch and a safety net, whether they can see it or not.

 
 

Sanford’s affair was a conscious choice, no matter how hard he tries to masquerade it as “just happened”.

All affairs are, and I say that as someone who has had his share.

Even the ones where you’re out and you get drunk and you screw around. You wouldn’t do that if your home life was happy…well, you might get drunk anyway, but you wouldn’t have the affair.

The term of art is “acting out,” where your behavior speaks volumes of words you can’t bring yourself to be honest about.

 
 

How’s the fruit salad?

 
 

look no further than our reaction to Mark Sanford

What has our reaction been? Mine has been HA HA. I certainly think someone who vanishes for a week is probably not worth electing, but I haven’t seen any of us here calling for him to resign, and my assumption is that his fate is in his own hands or the hands of his constituents at election time.

 
 

Does that statement not strike you as a bit sanctimonious?

No – it strikes me as rational. We’re human beings; we’re responsible for what we do and how it affects the society and environment around us.

I would even go so far as to suggest that a lot of people cheat precisely for the reason that it will precipitate the end of an unsatisfactory relationship, whether it’s a conscious decision or a subconscious one. Lots of people are wusses about ending things. An affair is both an escape hatch and a safety net, whether they can see it or not.

That’s probably true. It was really hard for me last time I broke up with someone…

 
Dragon-King Wangchuck
 

Incidentally, you know what else this whole affaire d’Argentine is about? Fucktard stenographers.

 
 

What has our reaction been? Mine has been HA HA.

Precisely.

We sit in judgement of him not for his policies (some of which are traceable back to his personality to be sure, but are also driven by his service to what he sees as his constituency), not for how he’s governed his state, but for his simple human failings.

That’s wrong, man, at least in my opinion.

 
 

Given what actor just said, would this be a good time to observe that it’s a good thing the paper didn’t uncover the following email?

Dear Penhouse Forum,
I never thought I’d be writing to you, but about a year ago at a convention I met a spicy Argentinian…”

 
 

Damn typo.

 
Dragon-King Wangchuck
 

And also PENIS. As well.

 
 

We sit in judgement of him not for his policies (some of which are traceable back to his personality to be sure, but are also driven by his service to what he sees as his constituency), not for how he’s governed his state, but for his simple human failings.

I think my position on this needs to be parsed a bit.

He had an affair; he apologised for it – having read his apology, I have no reason to believe it was anything but sincere. So far, my only reaction is sympathy for the man and his family.

But the moment I start snarking is the moment when his apologists start trying to rationalise it away.

 
Dragon-King Wangchuck
 

Damn typo.

In next month’s issue: pert erect nibs in our special fountain issue.

 
 

I think Penhouse would be more “Man On Dog” Santorum territory.

 
 

I’ll tell you what I do find funny and wholly within bounds– and given the tone of the postings here from DA et al, I think the folks at Sadly,No!Central agree.

It’s watching the right wing mainstream media spin, spin, spin, first the obviously ludicrous tale his staffers told on Monday and then trying to spin the admitted affair into somehow being Clinton’s fault.

 
 

Well, DKW, looks like my mind in a lot dirtier than yours…

 
 

But the moment I start snarking is the moment when his apologists start trying to rationalise it away.

Agreed. That’s damn funny shit!

 
 

We sit in judgement of him not for his policies (some of which are traceable back to his personality to be sure, but are also driven by his service to what he sees as his constituency), not for how he’s governed his state, but for his simple human failings.

I’m all for not giving a crap about the sex lives of public officials. But disappearing to Argentina without telling anyone or transferring power is a serious fuckup which isn’t just about personal human failings. Not to mention incredibly weird.

Likewise, hypocrites (including Spitzer) need to be called out for supporting policies with rhetoric and action that is contradicted by their own behavior.

But to the extent that personal behavior is unrelated to public governance, absolutely, a big whatevs to that. Certainly publishing the love letters was really gratuitous and pure titillation.

 
 

In next month’s issue: pert erect nibs in our special fountain issue

Damn. Did I miss the Big Balls issue? I was so hoping to check out the Bic bucks…

 
 

We sit in judgement of him not for his policies (some of which are traceable back to his personality to be sure, but are also driven by his service to what he sees as his constituency), not for how he’s governed his state, but for his simple human failings.

That’s wrong, man, at least in my opinion.

My mind is officially boggled. Laughing at it is natural and human, and for those who would put themselves on a platform to be judged like Sanford, wholly appropriate.

There but for the grace of God go I and so forth, and I hope that when I pull a stunt as embarrassingly funny the stories live for years.

 
Ted the Slacker
 

There but for the grace of God go I and so forth, and I hope that when I pull a stunt as embarrassingly funny the stories live for years.

Good call.

Have to say I’m a little disappointed no-one has pointed out the anchor baby angle to this story. I mean if wingnuts weren’t cussed enough by firstly trying to cover for Sanford only to find he had pooped on the family values bumper sticker, there’s plenty of scope to bait their anti-Latina asses all over again.

Seriously, a guy flies to Buenos Aires for his bit on the side and tells nobody? It would be irresponsible not speculate that he was either blowing goats or visiting his illegitimate kid.

 
 

#

actor212 said,

June 25, 2009 at 16:03

An onomatopaeic imitation of the guitar riff commonly heard in 1970’s porn movies.
Jim: “Hey, where are Abby and Jake?”
Tom: “Brown chicken, brown cow.”

Bwawkmoo? Huh?

Its a reference to the music in straight porn. Apparently it doesn’t have a diva house soundtrack like ours does.

 
Dragon-King Wangchuck
 

Did I miss the Big Balls issue?

They also did a special custom sized edition on 8.5″ x 14.0001″ stock. It was called Barely Legal.

 
 

[rimshot]

 
 

My reaction is to laugh like hell at someone’s simple human failings, when (and only when) their entire public self-presentation has been that they have no simple human failings, that they are MORAL and PURE, and all these dirty fucking hippies are going to hell because of their lack of TEH MORALS and jeebus.

Someone farther up the thread referred to him as a sociopath; that is my take on him, too. Pretty much my take on the entire sorry bunch of Wingnuttia.

 
 

at 18:29 Jennifer said:

I would even go so far as to suggest that a lot of people cheat precisely for the reason that it will precipitate the end of an unsatisfactory relationship . . . . An affair is both an escape hatch and a safety net, whether they can see it or not.

If the usual affair is an escape hatch and a safety net, I’d have to say Sanford’s affair was skydiving into Rockefeller Plaza.

 
 

We sit in judgement of him not for his policies (some of which are traceable back to his personality to be sure, but are also driven by his service to what he sees as his constituency), not for how he’s governed his state, but for his simple human failings.

“For what do we live, but to make sport for our neighbors, and laugh at them in our turn?” It’s not like Erick Erickson, Hindrocket, Chris Muir, Reynolds, etc, dumber than posts on purpose.

 
 

company = GloboChem

 
 

ok, this is funny – Jon Stewart on Mark Sanford:

“Just another politician with a conservative mind and a liberal penis.”

 
 

Sanford used to be really funny. Then he sold the junkyard or something, I guess. Good to see him dishing up the hoots again.

 
 

Sanford used to be really funny. Then he sold the junkyard or something, I guess.

I think this is the part where Lieutenant Governor Grady takes over.

 
 

I think this is the part where Lieutenant Governor Grady takes over.

I dunno, he’s pretty shady.

 
Wyatt Watts III
 

Sanford used to be really funny. Then he sold the junkyard or something, I guess. Good to see him dishing up the hoots again.

I wish Mark Sanford was Fred Sanford, ’cause then when he got caught he would have tried to get out of it by clutching his chest, feigning a heart attack, and saying “Elizabeth, I’m comin’ to join ya.”

And, also, Aunt Esther would have hit him with her purse.

 
 

Hike Nude Day

Now that’s funny. I hadn’t picked up that bit yet.

Actor, sorry, but after X number of years and what, $70 million pursuing Teh Clenis, there is no way one’s human foibles are off limits politically. Spitzer was run out of office somewhat more recently for pretty much the same thing.

It’s not just about his votes ten years ago, though. He has spent the intervening time flogging the “Family Values” banner mercilessly. I don’t see it as holding him to some decades-old standard. He himself has kept it very current. Not that judging people by their past actions is entirely inappropriate, either. See: Gingrich, divorce, if a refresher is needed. Past actions are really the only vaguely accurate measure we have, particularly of politicians. What, are we supposed to just take them at their word for the integrity they say they have? It’s why voting records exist.

Fact is, he’s just another hypocritical shitsnorkle that will bust out the torches and pitchforks at the drop of a hat to hound down others for behavior he begs mercy for when he engages in it himself. Fuck him. It does speak to character. It shows him clearly and deeply entrenched in the pervasive “I am not accountable for shit” mindset that plagues so many of our elected officials.

To be fair, I really don’t give a rat’s ass whose vagina he accidentally falls into. His record as Governor ought to be enough to make him an endless laughing stock. However, when one claims to walk on political water, one should not be entirely surprised to find oneself descending upright amongst schools of staring fish when push comes to shove.

 
 

No, I’m sorry, fuck that guy. The premise of the Fundie faction’s ideology is that they should hold elected office not because their plans are smarter or because their policies are more effective but because they are better people. Sanford himself set the standard by which he is being judged.

Think of it this way: Let’s say Kay Bailey Hutchinson is revealed to be the principle investor in a shady payday loan company that was dishonestly screwing the working poor; its a non-story, maybe 2 paragraphs on A18 in the TX papers. If Bernie Sanders is discovered to have the same role in the same company its front-page news in VT that potentially puts his political career at risk. Why? Teh Hypocrisy.

 
 

Damn that Sanford for distracting Roger L. His thoughtwaves were beaming over to Iran, and he was this close to overthrowing the oppressive regime through the power of concentration and democracy and liberty.

 
 

No, I’m sorry, fuck that guy.

I believe the missus has declined.

 
 

Also, those fucking emails are criminally godawful all by themselves.

I could digress and say that you have the ability to give magnificent gentle kisses, or that I love your tan lines or that I love the curve of your hips, the erotic beauty of you holding yourself (or two magnificent parts of yourself) in the faded glow of the night’s light…

*throws up a little bit*

 
 

I think the entire GOP is secretly relieved that, at the very least, Sanford didn’t pack two wetsuits for his trip.

 
 

Actor, sorry, but after X number of years and what, $70 million pursuing Teh Clenis, there is no way one’s human foibles are off limits politically.

So when do we stop?

What’s the official payback point?

Please. SOMEone let me know so we can start fixing the nation…

If there is a “get even,” why not now? Why not?

 
 

Oh, Actor, I must respectfully rebut and agree with Kingbu. This is not about payback, it is about exposing a set of religious, social, and political ideas which have been used to manipulate the stupid and the gullible.

 
 

@justme:

“Shitsnorkle.” My nom for the Best New Word of the Day for Thursday, June 25th 2009.

Shitsnorkle n,
1. See Mark Sanford
2. See Roger L. Simon
3. Also Newt Gingrich and Rush Limbaugh, and in fact Mark Foley and Bob Livingston and Ted Haggard and hell the whole lot of them.

 
 

I have to agree with actor212 in pciking at justme’s point: it shouldn’t be about revenge ever, and the hounding of Clinton demonstrated that there should be limits.

That said, Mark Sanford held a press conference about how he lied about secretly running away to Argentina for lurrrrve. If it’s off-limits you keep it off limits.

 
 

This is not about payback, it is about exposing a set of religious, social, and political ideas which have been used to manipulate the stupid and the gullible.

I thought those were pretty fully exposed in 2006 when we took back Congress.

Was I mistaken?

 
Dragon-King Wangchuck
 

via John Cole, who has also succumbed to the raw and unrehearsed Sanford sympathy play
http://slate.com/id/2221255

I’m not offering Sanford’s humanity as an excuse. I’m just marveling at how few people stopped for a moment to even nod to it. My thoughtful colleague William Saletan and Andrew Sullivan were exceptions. Maybe there are others.

Perhaps. I know both TPM and Swampland were all a-gushy, and the vast majority of what I read about it used the exact phrase “raw and unrehearsed”. Aside from some anonymous e-mails and tweets, Dickerson doesn’t point anyone out. And he was talking about live reax, which at the beginning of the thing was universally “man this guy is rambling, this don’t make no sense”.

I had some more vehemence to pile onto Dickerson, but then I read edroso’s take on it.

Even I was temporarily distracted from the fact that Sanford had concocted an elaborate scheme to conceal his actions, and only spoke up because he had no other options left.

Ah-yup. Prep a cover story, lie to staff, ditch security detail, change flight plans at the last minute even though no one is supposed to know where you are. Six fucking days he was gone – I am so convinced that he was “breaking it off”.

Fuck that fucker. It’s not just the hypocrisy, it’s the sleazy sliminess – and perhaps a bit of jealousy at the fact that he’s going to get away with this fairy tale bullshit story he’s sticking by.

 
 

D-KW,

I don’t have any sympathy for Sanford at all. He made (or unmade) his bed, now he can sleep in it. It’s up to him, his family and then the people of South Carolina to decide his fate.

But I have understanding. He’s human and there but for the grace of God…

And maybe this is my own form of self-righteousness, but I’d like to think after eight years of Clinton’s disgrace and watching a further eight years of Bushiness and the various stories– Foley, Craig, Vitter, and so on– we on the left are better than them.

 
Dragon-King Wangchuck
 

From Dickerson’s closing ‘graf

What Mark Sanford seemed to be trying to say is that he screwed up, in the biggest possible way, because he lost his bearings. He lost his self-control. He was indulgent.

He got caught.

Same as it ever was – Mark Sanford is very, very sorry – that he got caught. Don’t lose track of that when you weigh out how much sympathy he deserves.

 
 

Same as it ever was – Mark Sanford is very, very sorry – that he got caught.

So was Eliot Spitzer, or Jim McGreevey. After all, if there hadn’t been public exposure, those two would still be governors.

 
 

I thought those were pretty fully exposed in 2006 when we took back Congress.

Was I mistaken?

If they had stopped using them as talking points and started actually engaging real issues then you wouldn’t be. They continue to beat the “Family Values” drum, however, sometimes louder and faster than they did before their humiliating defeat.

I say keep on them until they cut it out.

 
 

I’m pretty happy Spitzer isn’t a governor. He spent a good long time prosecuting the same class of people he was patronizing. He deserved punishment if he wasn’t willing to stand up for the people who helped him realize his private dreams.

 
 

I say keep on them until they cut it out.

Which is better for the country, then? A four year investigation that distracts us from problems like Iraq or Al Qaeda into one man’s blow jobs, or the continual drum beat every time a human fucks up?

Cuz either way, nothing is getting talked about, and the powerful are getting more so.

 
 

RB,

Do you think the NYS legislature would be in utter gridlock, with the city budget now hanging by a thread, with gay marriage in jeopardy of being snuffed out, if Spitzer hadn’t been exposed?

Patterson has been less than ineffectual as governor.

 
 

actor, the equivalence you are drawing is off base. We’re talking about feeling sorry for the guy or versus enjoying the ever nectarish schadenfreude of a manipulative, lying, uber-hypocrite getting caught being a lying uber-hypocrite.

Teh CLENIS affair was a vile abuse by congress et. al. in which, aft6er years of digging, was the only thing they could come up with so they went with that.

 
 

Actor, false choice. I give this another week tops. Plus, I think the country can walk and chew gum at the same time.

 
 

We’re talking about feeling sorry for the guy or versus enjoying the ever nectarish schadenfreude of a manipulative, lying, uber-hypocrite getting caught being a lying uber-hypocrite.

You misread me, then.

I don’t feel sorry.

I don’t fucking care. We have a lot more important things we need to be looking at.

 
 

So what are you saying, Actor? No fair attacking Sanford for his human foibles? We should agree to unilaterally disarm ourselves in the “family values” debate because we are, or should be, better than they are? Snarky attacks on this page should be limited to matters of policy? What fun is any of that?

Fuck that. When your opponent is down, broken, defeated and pleading for mercy in NO time to stop kicking.

 
 

I give this another week tops.

And then next week’s scandal? That gets a week?

And the week after’s scandal?

 
 

Do you think the NYS legislature would be in utter gridlock, with the city budget now hanging by a thread, with gay marriage in jeopardy of being snuffed out, if Spitzer hadn’t been exposed?

No, and it’s sad.

 
 

We should agree to unilaterally disarm ourselves in the “family values” debate because we are, or should be, better than they are?

For the sake of making this country a better place for all of us, ignoring this kind of stuff would go a long way.

Don’t you get tired of the “Well, it was OK for Clinton. Well, it was Ok for Craig. Well, it was OK for Spitzer. Well, it was OK for Vitter.” endless fucking merry-go-round?

 
 

No, and it’s sad.

Gay marriage would have passed by now. That’s my take on it.

 
Dragon-King Wangchuck
 

I didn’t follow the McGreevey thing very closely, but Spitzer? Fuck that fucker too. I’m less outraged at Eliot (a bit because of the hypocrisy but also a bit) because he was just about teh hawt hooker seXXXors. Sanford was All In.

Is looking at pr0n cheating? Of course not. Actually fucking other people? Definitely cheating. Fucking penning teenaged angsty love letters? Proclaiming your love of your mistress during a fucking press conference? Holy Invisible Pink Unicorn, that’s a whole ‘nother level of cheat.

Also, what RB said.

And additionally, PENIS. Also.

 
 

And the week after’s scandal?

Two weeks if we want. Like I implied, I really don’t think that this is an impediment to dealing with real issues. If anything, it helps weaken their position.

Realpolitik.

 
 

Gay marriage would have passed by now. That’s my take on it.

Well fuck Eliot Spitzer twice.

 
 

And then next week’s scandal? That gets a week?

And the week after’s scandal?

So what the fuck do you want us to do? Hold the snark? STFU? Then what? Your complaints are falling on deaf ears at least in part because there aint diddly squat any of us can do to change the situation.

Sit back and enjoy it, that’s what always works for me. You don’t have to take part. By the same token, stop trying to RAM YOUR OPINION DOWN OUR THROATS~!

 
Dragon-King Wangchuck
 

I missed the words “degree of” before hypocrisy in the parenthetical.

Also, I wanted to add PENIS. Additionally.

 
 

Two weeks if we want.

We want…interesting choice of phrase.

It is about free will and the freedom to choose.

So why would we ever choose to diminsh ourselves?

 
 

If there is a “get even,” why not now? Why not?

No. It’s not about “getting even”. I was just saying that there is no fucking way in hell, given the political traction that “the right” once got out of a blowjob, that that genie is going back into the JFK-era bottle. Period. I wouldn’t mind if it did, but unh-unh, naagoohnhaaaapn. To pretend that unilateral disarmcockament will make the country free from genito-politics is naive at best.

As I said, I don’t care where he docks his cock. His family might, but I really don’t, aside from any possibly amusing scenarios involving wetsuits, farm animals or the like. My problem is with those who pretend to be high and mighty and above such foibles, who spend no small amount of time berating the rest of us about the ethical cleanliness – or lack thereof – of our genitalia, who are finally shown up as the hypocrites they have always been and then claim some right to not be judged by the same standards.

It is pertinent to their method of governance. Hell, it is their method of governance, and it stinks. Genitalia or otherwise, they have the same attitude about how and to whom accountability should applied. It grows from the same roots as “criminalizing politics” and “governing for the majority of the majority (of the majority…)”. It’s bad politics. It’s bad governance. It’s bad humanity. I have no problem holding the fucking kreig lights on any and all behavior that illustrates it.

Besides, I love a little schadenfreude as much as the next guy.

Oh, and, fuck ’em.

 
RUGGED IN MONTANA
 

PLEASE EXCUSE ELIOT SPITZER’S FINGERS!!!

 
 

Your complaints are falling on deaf ears at least in part because there aint diddly squat any of us can do to change the situation.

So you’re saying this is inbred to us? That none of us has choice but to discuss another man’s failings?

I think my arguments here prove that’s clearly not the case.

Look, there are aspects of this situation that cry out for snark. Erick Erickson is a really good example, calling him out on his strident defense of Sanford in light of the facts as they unfolded. And I have absolutely no problem with picking over those bones.

But it’s hypocritical to say “Well, they did it to Clinton” as if that’s some kind of license to always invoke hypocrisies, because in part, Clinton’s scandal wasn’t just that he had sex with a woman, but that he lied, to our faces, about it.

That cannot be denied, and believe me, there is no one in this country who is stronger in his admiration of Clinton than I. If there was a way to deny it, I would.

Somewhere along the way, it has to stop. What I’m suggesting is maybe that time is now.

 
 

And then there’s the whole refreshment side of things.

 
 

My problem is with those who pretend to be high and mighty and above such foibles, who spend no small amount of time berating the rest of us about the ethical cleanliness – or lack thereof – of our genitalia, who are finally shown up as the hypocrites they have always been and then claim some right to not be judged by the same standards.

Correct me if I’m wrong, but Clinton signed DoMA into law, right?

 
 

Correct me if I’m wrong, but Clinton signed DoMA into law, right?

Yeah. A constant disappointment, that guy.

 
 

Somewhere along the way, it has to stop.

Somewhere along the way, what needs to fucking stop is the lying and hypocrisy. I just don’t see “leaving it alone” as any way to further that end.

I repeat, it’s not about getting even for Clinton. It’s not about revenge. Not for me, anyway.

 
 

Yeah. A constant disappointment, that guy.

So we’re talking about pointing out the hypocrisies of people who pointed out the hypocrisies of a man who stuck his dick in a woman’s mouth who wasn’t his wife while defending traditional marriage.

I’m lost now. Why are we doing this again?

 
You Can't Put Lipstick On A Repig
 

Patterson has been less than ineffectual as governor.

Some people, to use a Fox phrase, think Spitzer was outed because he was getting to close to some very powerful people in his investigations of financial impropriety on Wall Street.

Occam’s Razor* seals the deal on that explanation.

* (the updated Occam’s Razor rule is: if a mysterious action occurs that can be tied somehow to rich people’s interests, said rich people’s interests are the cause)

 
You Can't Put Lipstick On A Repig
 

I’m lost now. Why are we doing this again?

It’s not just the hypocrisy. When Dems do this, they leave office or are (almost) booted out of office. When ‘pigs do this, they get the ‘pigs to pass resolutions (Vitter) saying they are great people.

Equal punishment for equal faults. If Sanford resigns, all will be fine with me. That still leaves a bunch of pigs holding office who should resign, but it’s a start.

 
 

Maybe it served primarily as a crab-catcher, though if the region was shaved, crabs wouldn’t be a problem anyway, would they?

Think of it more as the equivalent of dabbing heavy makeup over the herpes sores.

 
 

Clinton’s scandal wasn’t just that he had sex with a woman, but that he lied, to our faces, about it.

C’mon. They all lied to our faces about it, until they were caught.

 
 

Correct me if I’m wrong, but Clinton signed DoMA into law, right?

A). And? I haven’t read it recently, but I don’t recall it having a “Thou shalt not get a blowjob from an intern” clause.

B). I’m not the one claiming to be a huge Clinton fan anyway. I have some real problems with the guy. DOMA being frankly low on the list, though illustrative.

 
 

We need an exorcist to cast out the ghost of St. Francis, or whoever it is who has taken possession of Actor212’s formerly snarky soul.

Do unto others as you would have them do unto you? Turn the other cheek? Leave the poor guy alone, I mean W. T. F?

This isn’t just about the politics of personal destruction, it’s the politics of total annihilation of your enemies. Period. As St. Molly said, “Politics ain’t beanbag.”

And yes, turnabout is fair play. That means if you’re stupid enough to leave yourself open for these kinds of distracting personal attacks, you shouldn’t be in the game. That goes for our guys as much as theirs.

I never said it was OK if Clinton did it, or Spitzer, or Edwards or anyone else. I was furious at all of those men–not for what they did with their dicks, but because of what they did to the causes they believe in, and to the party that took the hits for their stupidity.

 
 

Somewhere along the way, what needs to fucking stop is the lying and hypocrisy.

We’re talking about politicians. They’re going to lie. They’re going to be hypocrites. They’re going to take money from Big Pharma, say, while selling us a bill of goods as healthcare reform.

That kind of hypocrisy I have no problem calling them out on, just so we’re clear.

And until we can get leaders who won’t lie to us, who will behave in a consistent manner, we’re going to have hypocrites and liars.

Tragically, the only way we’re going to get people like that to even run (apart from the issues about campaign finance, I mean) is to stop tearing their personal lives apart.

And so long as they look around themselves and see, one by one, politicians who aspire to something bigger get torn apart, we’re going to get the government we deserve: liars and hypocrites.

 
 

Why are we doing this again?

Why are we doing what? Making sport of a funny situation?

BECAUSE IT IS FUNNY.

So was Clinton’s situation, really…

 
 

Some people, to use a Fox phrase, think Spitzer was outed because he was getting to close to some very powerful people in his investigations of financial impropriety on Wall Street.

He was outted because he asked for a refund, to be truthful. If he hadn’t insisted and the money hadn’t been wired and exceeded $10,000, they would have missed him.

 
 

Mathew said we could rag on his ass. It’s in the bible and shit.

Do not judge so that you will not be judged. For in the way you judge, you will be judged; and by your standard of measure, it will be measured to you. Why do you look at the speck that is in your brother’s eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye? Or how can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ and behold, the log is in your own eye? “You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brother’s eye.

 
 

the updated Occam’s Razor

I think that’s “Occam’s gold-plated letter opener”.

 
 

Do unto others as you would have them do unto you? Turn the other cheek? Leave the poor guy alone, I mean W. T. F?

Dude…I’m a Christian.

 
 

Mathew said we could rag on his ass. It’s in the bible and shit.

Do not judge so that you will not be judged.

Correct, but your interpretation is woeful. It means don’t judge, ever. It doesn’t matter if you were judged first.

 
 

For what it’s worth, if Clinton had taken off for a week-long blowjob bender, a lot more people would have thought it a bigger deal. Sanford was guilty of a total dereliction of his duties, and I can point that out while not ignoring other news. I can even laugh at Sanford, Clinton, Roger L. Simon, Erick Erickson, or whomever without causing any major disruption in the ebb and flow of life, the universe, and whatnot. Anyhoo, if you don’t want to pay attention to such stuff, nobody’s making you.

 
Rusty Shackleford
 

On the one hand, 2d Amendment sexy, but on the other hand, moral decline. On the third hand, Little Debbie still has her Charlie’s Angels trading cards.

 
 

If you’re tying to change all of society to not want to pay attention, though, well, good luck but don’t hold your breath.

 
 

Trying. Sorry, teh sexx on the brain, I suppose.

 
Dragon-King Wangchuck
 

It means don’t judge, ever.
Careful, you’re treading close to Red State territory there.

Some things are wrong. Making hay out of the misery of others is wrong, it’s mean and spiteful and uncivil and yucky. And also FUCKING HILARIOUS.

You know what they say, if life gives you lemons, making lemonade – and if life gives you a sanctimonious righteous crusader who is in the thrall of his Little Govenor, make snark. It’s in the Bible!

 
 

Tig, I’ll give you that Sanford was derelict in his duties, based on what we know now (I’m not falling into the Red State trap of assuming facts that may not be there 🙂 ).

And I love that Erick Erickson is flopping like a freshly caught flounder. That’s too juice.

But it would be even more juice if he was making all these statements about how the liberals said this, and the liberals said that about Sanford…and he had nothing to back his point up.

 
 

Look, nobody here is claiming to be above anyone morally. You don’t want to even THINK about where my genitals have been (It was fun, but sometimes even I don’t want to think about it). The point is that they will continue to come at us as hard, and as fast, and as dirty as they can- so we need to use the tools that we have available.

There is no such thing as a higher ground here, or a higher moral purpose. Even the torture argument eventually boils down to the fact that that shit just doesn’t work in the final analysis, and hurts us in the eyes of the world. Morality is individual, and therefore should be left to the individual. The whole point of politics- or of law, for that matter- is to create a forum where individual morality intersects with the common good in a way that puts policy in place that benefits the greatest number of people. Even laws which protect the rights of minorities exist because ultimately protecting those rights benefits the community-at-large. Individual morality may provide impetus for law, and it may inform a great deal of it, but the purpose of law is simply to provide a place where morality does not matter because the greatest good for the greatest number has been realized.

Good government is pragmatic government, because if it becomes anything else, we are led down the path of preferring one individual’s morality over that of another. This to me, incidentally, is the difference between “classic” liberalism and progressivism- the first seeks a moral government, and the second seeks an effective one.

And this leads us back to the our friend Sanford, and to Actor’s well-meaning, if misguided, argument. We use scandal for political gain because it works to do so, most of the time, and government isn’t about morality or how we feel about ourselves. Government is about what works.

Annnndddd I am spent. Thanks for putting up with me.

 
 

I think I speak for others when I say that we are loath to go into fits over someone’s peccadilloes. Had the squeaky clean gubner not very publically proclaimed his moral superiority, had he not been a culture warrior with a long history of trying to force his alleged morality into the law, had he, in short, not been a total dickwad hypocrite then I would say leave him alone.

But he did, Blanche. But he did.

 
 

But it would be even more juice if he was making all these statements about how the liberals said this, and the liberals said that about Sanford…and he had nothing to back his point up.

Don’t tell a joke because Erick Erickson finds it evidence of something? That’s nuts.

 
 

OK, look…

Three hours ago, I pointed out that while I didn’t understand why this story was so important, I was not going to start telling people not to make fun of it.

In the course of defending that simple statement, I find myself suddenly in the position of, well, almost telling people not to make fun of it.

I’m sorry. I’ve spent the last five days in Argentina, crying into my pillows (38DD’s, if you must know), agonizing over this difficult position YOU, the LIBERAL MEDIA BLOGGER TYPES, have put me in.

Carry on.

 
 

Don’t tell a joke because Erick Erickson finds it evidence of something? That’s nuts.

Ever play a sport, RB?

Did your coach ever tell you, “when your opponents fucking up, don’t lend him a hand”?

That’s what I meant.

 
 

Actor, now I feel like we twisted your arm until you cried “uncle”. You’re still one of my favorites, here, in case you didn’t know.

 
Rusty Shackleford
 

Oh – sorry, you guys are in the middle of something.

 
 

Tomm, it’s OK but thanks.

Unlike certain Republicans I can mention (and some Iranian Presidents) I can see when the votes are against me. I still believe what I believe. I’m just going to shut up now and watch how this all plays out.

 
 

actor212,

Thay may be what you want it to say, but from where I sit it looks like the “don’t do the crime if you can’t do the time/paybacks a bitch” clause.

Also Judas Priest said

“One life I’m gonna live it up
I’m takin’ flight I said I’ll never get enough
Stand tall I’m young and kinda proud
I’m on top as long as the music’s loud”

 
Dragon-King Wangchuck
 

Carry on.

Don’t mind if I do. BWAHAHAHHAH

D.A. ‘s comment was prophetic. Fucking awesome.

Aside for Big Pharma’s research interns – Sanford’s affair started a year ago.

 
 

Don’t mind if I do. BWAHAHAHHAH

That ranks right up there with “They were just fraternity pranks!”

 
Dragon-King Wangchuck
 

Social diseases ism. The thing that causes you to abandon your job and family and run off to join the circus Argentinian mistress who looks good cradling her bubbles.

 
 

Did your coach ever tell you, “when your opponents fucking up, don’t lend him a hand”?

I’m not clear on what help Erickson’s received though.

 
 

I think Michelle Bachman (R – DSM IV) will have to apologize to Michelle Malkin.

 
 

But it would be even more juice if he was making all these statements about how the liberals said this, and the liberals said that about Sanford…and he had nothing to back his point up.

Well, we are a vasty majority now, there are going to be some dumbfucks, we’re only responsible for not being such ourselves, insofar as we are able. Besides, it’s all argumentum ad hominem, anyway: “shut up because CLINTON” doesn’t mean anything except get a bucket ready to catch the sweet, sweet wingnut tears.

 
 

I don’t know, actor. The state of grace you describe existed back when stupid people were allowed to believe politicians were saints. They never were, of course, but an agreement existed to by and large allow stupid people have their conceits (e.g. People that didn’t give a rat’s ass about JFK boinking whoever he liked knew about it but didn’t crow about it, knowing there were clay feet all around).

Now in the country there is a large mass of stupid people who are not being allowed to keep their conceits. Partly 24 hour news cycle, partly cutthroat pols changing from the Democratic party to the Republican party then glomming onto the idiot evangelical crowd, but now one side *publicly* pretends not to have feet of clay while pushing morality legislation. Until the latter stops being part of the agenda, I don’t think unilateral forgiveness is the way to go. The hypocrites needs to be shamed until stupid people stop supporting false idols.

 
 

@actor212

I know you’ve more or less given up arguing, but I’m just gonna put this out here in clear text one more time.

Honestly, the problem with Sanford is that he, and his party, are sanctimonious lying sons of bitches, and the purpose of the wholesale assault on Mark Sanford and his phony “love” affair and his lying and his bullshit is to bring him down to where the rest of the groundlings live. He has presumed to hoist himself above the common man with his membership in groups like the incredibly inaptly-named “Promise Keepers” (should more properly be titled Woman Beaters”) and his stern moralizing during the Clenis affair.

Turns out, his feet are crumbling clay like any other poor slob’s. And I will relish pointing this out, and in fact printing it on the head of a hammer and stamping it on the forehead of other sanctimonious assholes unto the end of the motherfucking world, amen.

 
 

RB, without beating a dead horse much longer…from RedState

The left is linking to this post to laugh at it. What they are missing is that most of us tend to give people the benefit of the doubt — even people like John Edwards.

Just imagine if he couldn’t have said that. He’d have nothing to post with respect to excusing his inexcusable mistake of jumping the gun with his “these are the facts, folks!” except “I fucked up”.

 
 

Pig, Toad,

Just wanted to acknowledge that I read your comments, since you both took a fair amount of time to think and write that out. Thanks.

I suppose there’s something to be said, in general, about holding up examples the next time someone in the GOP says “AHA! Morals! Clinton! Democrats bad!”

 
 

Curiouser and curiouser, PeeJ misquoted. A common tater at TPM speculates on Sanford’s hooking up Down Agrentine Way*.

You really need to check out your link to the C-Street group. According to your article, the house that Ensign, Sanford and several other congressmen were hanging out at was affiliated with a religious group called “The Family”. That group used to go by the name of “The Children of God”. Well, I am not in favor of pejorative attacks, but the scuttlebutt on that group was that they engaged in group sex and a practice known as “flirty fishing” which involved female members witnessing their faith via sexual contact, etc. Is that the group that these congressmen were hanging out at. One sidenote: the group is big in S. America and Argentina.

* an absolutely vapid film that I just adore. I mean, it’s got Carmen Miranda. What could be better?

 
 

slippy toad,

not to mention a member of the Family.

http://www.harpers.org/archive/2003/03/0079525

 
 

actor212, the only way we get closer to the bi-partisan “let’s all just leave the personal shit out of it” ideal that you suggest is by making the GOP’s Party Of Christan Values™ trope so politically toxic that they themselves give it up as a non-starter. Ridiculing the hypocrites is the fastest way there.

Don’t worry, this isn’t a permanent condition. America does these “Awakening”s about once every other generation and each time it plays out the same: the hypocrites discredit the movement and the line between religion and politics gets a little brighter for a while (until next time).

 
 

Just imagine if he couldn’t have said that.

I’m imagining. One less funny thing Erick Erickson said but nothing else is different in the least.

 
 

Just imagine if he couldn’t have said that.

The thing is he can’t honestly say that. The right didn’t give Edwards the benefit of the doubt, nor Clinton, nor Spitzer, ad infinitum. They don’t give people the benefit of the doubt, they give Republicans the benefit of the doubt, often even long after there’s no doubt to be had. Hell, in that post he said the wife knew where he was after she’d said publicly she didn’t. That’s not giving Sanford the benefit of the doubt, at best that’s averting one’s eyes from the obvious, at worst lying to provide cover.

 
 

I repeat, When your opponent is down, broken, defeated and pleading for mercy in NO time to stop kicking.

 
 

Kingubu,

Don’t worry, it was just a pang of guilt. I took an advil and it’s gone.

The whole thing makes me feel oily.

And not in a good way.

 
 

I repeat, When your opponent is down, broken, defeated and pleading for mercy in NO time to stop kicking.

Okay. You could have fixed the typo this time, neh?

 
 

I wouldn’t want to be held accountable for something I did ten or eleven years ago…

Tell you what — if the left bloggosphere collectively forgive Sanford for casting votes and making sanctimonious statements eleven years ago, while the right bloggosphere collectively forgive Clinton for receiving a blowjob eleven years ago, then everyone can shake hands and be friends again.

 
 

copypasta busted

IS no time..there happy?

 
 

I’m going to be the butt of jokes for much of the evening, aren’t I? 🙂

 
 

“Tell you what — if the left bloggosphere collectively forgive Sanford for casting votes and making sanctimonious statements eleven years ago, while the right bloggosphere collectively forgive Clinton for receiving a blowjob eleven years ago, then everyone can shake hands and be friends again.”

Al Czervik: “Hey everybody, we’re all gonna get laid.”

 
Dragon-King Wangchuck
 

Gentlemen. You have no time. Make your chance.

 
 

I’m going to be the butt of jokes for much of the evening, aren’t I? 🙂

Hey! Its been over a year and people are still riffing on my “you try walking around the mall in a fat suit” bit. Take yer turn, boy-o.

 
 

Sex Scandals Through the Years: Both Parties Even

The authors…I’d tap those.

 
 

I do not think this is the kind of “bird” you were supposed to be hunting, governor:

Kara Borie, spokeswoman for the South Carolina Department of Commerce, confirmed Thursday afternoon taxpayer money was used to fund a Brazil trade and investment mission in which Sanford was present for on June 21-28, 2008.

“A number of the participants from the Brazil trade and investment mission, at the invitation and suggestion of Secretary Taylor and at their own personal expense, went to Cordoba, Argentina, following the Brazil mission to go bird hunting,” Borie added.

Well, a bird in the bush and all…

 
 

I think it’s important to point out the fact that Mr. Sanctity of Marriage clearly doesn’t believe in the sanctity of marriage. It takes the wind out of his anti-gay marriage arguments, and makes him lose credibility. That’s important to us advocates out there.

 
 

Luke, come over to the dark side.

 
Rusty Shackleford
 

It takes the wind out of his anti-gay marriage arguments, and makes him lose credibility. That’s important to us advocates out there.

How do we know that Sanford didn’t start banging the conga drum slowly because poofters were getting married in CalifornGAY?

 
 

Just skimming the list, that sex scandals article misses a bunch and gets at least one party wrong, though it looks like they didn’t count it: Gerry Studds was a Democrat.

 
 

To clarify this:

That group used to go by the name of “The Children of God”. Not the same.

The Family is serious & powerful. The Children of Gawd were/are a cult. Not saying The Family isn’t, either, but they pick their marks from the wealthy & powerful, like Sanford & last wk.’s scandal, Sen. Ensign, & have an agenda far beyond hawt sexx for the overlords.

Some tin-foil speculation & links at FDL. If you haven’t heard of the Family, you should know all about them.

 
 

Damn. Did I miss the Big Balls issue? I was so hoping to check out the Bic bucks…
I got your pen-p0rn right here!

the eyes of this country should be fixed on the horrific events coming from that company and the struggle for freedom against all odds by many of its brave citizens.

And all hands should be clapping for Tinkerbell. Struth. It’s not fair to pick out Sanford for the title of ‘Most laughable US nimrod’ when some fucknozzle pundit is appointing himself as Eyeball Czar and Custodian of the National Gaze.
Events in Iran are turning into the Green Lantern Revolution.

 
 

the butt of jokes
Is that in Montana?

 
 

I got your pen-p0rn right here!

yea, baby! Yea! Look at the curves on that Omas! Oooooh…..man….if I could only wrap my fingers around that…

 
 

the butt of jokes
Is that in Montana?

More like Man-tana…

 
 

I thought this entire site was dedicated to zooming in on others’ failings.

 
Big Bad Bald Bastard
 

Re-reading E Pluribus Unum’s spittle-flecked “YOU DON’T GET TO JUDGE US!!!11!!!!” post gave me the new motto for Conservative America:

E Pluribus Sputum

 
 

Re-reading E Pluribus Unum’s spittle-flecked “YOU DON’T GET TO JUDGE US!!!11!!!!” post

“We police our own.” Jail for Sanford then.

 
Rusty Shackleford
 

TIDoS Yankee has a post up about the Atlanta Tea Party over at Jammieworld.

Commenting there is a snap.

 
 

“police our own”. Like David Vitter, you mean, Erick Erickturgidson?

 
 

‘scuze me, E Pluribus Unum (if that is your real name)

 
 

Is that in Montana?
Three cowboys from from different states met at a rodeo. While investigating the midway there they came upon a game wherein an aged man offered two-to-one odds that he could guess your home state without hearing you speak a word.
The first cowboy slapped a ten dollar bill down and the aged one said “You’re from Texas.”
“How did you know, asked the cowboy?”
“I could tell by your boots,” replied the carny.
The second cowboy then laid down a twenty.
“You’re from Colorado,” said the carny.
“Well, how did you figure that?” asked the cowboy.
“I could tell by the way that you roll the brim of your hat,” the carny answered.
The third cowboy decided that he would completely bamboozle the old man. He went back to his truck and switched his Stetson for a baseball cap. Then he swapped his boots for an old pair of running shoes and donned a Che Guevara t-shirt.
He returned to the concession and laid a Ben Franklin on the counter.
“You’re from Montana,” said the concessionaire as he pocketed the hundred.
“What the hell?” complained the cowboy. “It can’t be the hat and I ain’t wearing boots. I even put on a damn’ commie t-shirt. How the hell did you know that I was from Montana?”
“By the little tuft of wool caught in your zipper.”

 
 

Rumor Mill:

Michael Jackson allegedly dead, per TMZ.com.

 
 

Philosophize all you like, but score the point for our side all the same. Anyway, sooner or later one of Sanford’s fellow rats would have ratfucked him if he’d lasted as long as the 2012 primaries.

I’m enjoying the hell out of watching every latest Republican Great White (and I do mean White) Hope flame (*PAF*) out on his way to 2012 like Lastdayers grasping at Renewal in Carousel. (*Foop!*)

Best of all, it keeps the Sensible Liberals continually off balance. Whenever a GOP challenger appears who doesn’t look creepy and is merely mean instead of batshit crazy, the Villagers say he will “heal the partisan divide” and grant him an aura of inevitability. When they’ve staked a fair bit of their credibility on him, he fucks up but good or else wingnuts turn on him.

A seemingly endless rush of win.

 
 

Michael Jackson allegedly dead, per TMZ.com.
Aw fuck. It’s bad enough when contemporaneus old guys pass on but Jackson was eleven years younger than I am. I pulled out “Thriller” and I’m playing it loud for what was.

 
Big Bad Bald Bastard
 

I think it’s important to point out the fact that Mr. Sanctity of Marriage clearly doesn’t believe in the sanctity of marriage. It takes the wind out of his anti-gay marriage arguments, and makes him lose credibility.

Yeah, I don’t look at criticism of Stanford as politics of personal destruction so much as political disarmament of the god-botherers. The whole “family values” trope has to be killed, staked, and buried at the crossroads.

Funny how anybody constantly talking about “the family” almost always turns out to be a gangster.

 
I Cried My Heart Out For Want Of My Love
 

Another name on the Obama Death List.

 
Big Bad Bald Bastard
 

Back to snarking- with his “two magnificent parts” and his “five days of crying”, Sanford is now, literally, a “whiny-ass titty-baby”.

 
Disco Ball Battalion
 

Does anyone know the whereabouts of Weird Al?

 
 

But please tell me he’s not responsible for Farrah, too.

 
 

Farrah and MJ on the same day. Somebody get David Hasselhoff to the safe-house, quick!

 
RUGGED IN MONTANA
 

the butt of jokes
Is that in Montana?

OH, VERY FUNNY MR. WISEACRE!!! MY BEAUTIFUL BUTTE MAY BE INFESTED WITH RABID PELICANS, BUT IT IS STILL A WONDEFUL PLACE TO EXPLORE!!! YOU CAN PASS THROUGH A DARK DOOR IN THE MIDDLE OF A SMELLY ALLEYWAY AND DISCOVER THAT IT HIDES A WARM, INVITING PLACE!! YOU COMMIES WILL NEVER KNOW THE JOY OF BUTTE UNLESS YOU GET INTO IT AND PROBE THE DEPTHS OF THE PLACE!!!

 
Michael Jackson's aides
 

He’s hiking.

 
Shithouse Troll
 

YOU COMMIES WILL NEVER KNOW THE JOY OF BUTTE UNLESS YOU GET INTO IT AND PROBE THE DEPTHS OF THE PLACE!!!

Scuse…..mah….fin-GAHS!!!!!

 
 

Michael Jackson allegedly dead, per TMZ.com.

No, that was Farrah Fawcett, but I completely understand the confusion.

 
 

LA Times says MJ declared dead.

 
 

Oh my, I guess he really is dead. Three weeks younger than I.

I’m theorizing the GOP did it to get their stench out of the headlines.

 
Pope Disturban the Vth
 

The GOP does have a bright side to this scandal.

At least this time, it was a _heterosexual_ affair.

 
 

Bubbles on suicide watch. AGAIN.

 
Disco Ball Battalion
 

Someone is killing off the seventies!

 
 

E Pluribus Sputum

E Shortbus Unum?
Over at Wo’C, ‘jackd’ suggests “E Pluribus Tantrum”.

 
 

Michael Jackson allegedly dead, per TMZ.com.

Not alleged anymore.

 
 

Also, someone who will be missed was the middle of the celeb-death trifecta.

Sky Saxon, R. I. P. (It’s like when Darby died a day before John Lennon. He didn’t get the coverage he deserved either.)

Will this crap be over by Monday? All local L. A. tee vee stations are all over it. (Jackson, obviously.)

 
 

“I’m forever blowing Bubbles …”

 
 

A friend at UCLA says there are choppers in the air and cops in the streets. Over-reacting?

 
 

E Pluribus Sputum

E Shortbus Unum?

I’d thought E Pluribus Urine, then felt guilty* and didn’t post it.

* I know, REALLY, right?

 
Michael Jackson's aides
 

Not dead. Still hiking.

 
 

Or how about E Pluribus Onan? Oh, the guilt…

 
 

“I’m forever blowing Bubbles …”

Good, I’m not the only asshole with sick jokes on his mind.

How did Michael Jackson spend his honeymoon?

Little Boy Blew.

 
 

E Pluribus Venom? I really have to stop doing this.

 
 

If I’d just seen the photos without reading the headlines, I would have assumed that Courtney Cox had died.

 
Danny Mason Keener
 

The dimwitted reporter on CNN keeps cracking up and snickering or outright giggling while interviewing people milling around, who are also mostly snickering and giggling or mugging for the cameras. I’m indifferent toward Jackson, but it’s kind of weird to see such a festive, carnival atmosphere surrounding a death.

 
 

For the warbloggers: E pluribus uniform.

 
Big Bad Bald Bastard
 

I really have to stop doing this.

To quote Mark Sanford, “No, don’t stop, keep on doing that.”

I don’t know what libation to pour on Farrah’s grave (Wella Balsam shampoo?), but Jesus Juice will do for Michael Jackson.

Q: How is Michael Jackson like Sears?
A: Both have boys’ underwear half off.

 
 

I heard Jackson died of food poisoning. It can be pretty dangerous to eat 12-year-old meat.

 
 

DO YOU WANT TO BE STARTING SOMETHING?

 
 

What’s the word for the close opposite of starfucking? The incessant shitting upon Lindsay Lohan, Britney Spears and the rest has always annoyed me a little. It goes way beyond “oh look at the funny celebrity screwup” and into creepy moral self-gratification, and that’s without delving into the comments section of TMZ, etc. Cable news judy loves to drive and indulge in that crap.

Bah. Whatever. I like the other Michael Jackson, who died not too long ago.

 
 

What’s the word for the close opposite of starfucking?

Envy.

 
 

Anxiously awaiting Debbie Schnozzle’s take on Michael Jackson. If she could turn Farrah Fawcett’s death into an “arm yourself like Farrah, against the moral decay Farrah caused” screed, what will she do w/ MJ?

 
Debbie Schlussel
 

MICHAEL JACKSON IS A PURVEYOR OF FILTH THAT TRIED TO INFILTRATE THE WHITE RACE, JUST LIKE THOSE DEARBORN MUZZIES

 
Big Bad Bald Bastard
 

Roger L. Simon would write that Michael Jackson, being a librul Obamessiahbot, died to keep ‘Murka’s eyes off the heroic struggles of the Iranian Freedom Strugglers (TM).

And, of course, his take on the death of Farrah (sic) would also have an Iranian focus.

 
 

A friend at UCLA says there are choppers in the air…

Oh? Did your friend mention what color they are?

 
 

E Pluribus FUCKBUM.

 
 

Edere Non Potest Unum.

 
The Sun Hates Your Haircut
 

Mark Sanford is poised to be the Gary Condit of 2009.

 
 

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