Doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo…here’s to you Mrs……

Dude, I’m actually serious about setting them up. Finding true love might make Ben less of an asshole. We’ll see.

Is there a color version of that Ben photo kicking around? Clif at Outside the Tent seems to have one for Photoshop purposes, but I can’t find an original that’s large enough.

Here you go, Gavin:

http://www.spirituality.org/i/bshapiro.jpg

Now, if the local papers print a fake a wedding announcement about a certain Mr. Shapiro and a certain Miss Marie, I’ll know who to blame . . .

Unless Ben converts to Christianity, I don’t think Marie is going to show him her Poeple Pilotical thong much less tie the knot with him. Besides everyone knows Ben is gay. Why else would he feel it necessary to call Brokeback Mountain “stomach-churning?”

Unless Ben converts to Christianity, I don’t think Marie is going to show him her Poeple Pilotical thong much less tie the knot with him.

He’d do it. Like Prager and Feder, he’s already deferential to his Christian overlords.

The lucky woman that marries him will be delighted and titillated to know she was his only love physically.

Sorry, I think his right hand got their first.

Hysterical Woman- I dunno. Ben took a pretty strong stance against masturbation in Porn Generation.

Like I’ve said, we really need to find the boy somebody. It might stop him from being such a jack-ass.

Ben just needs to quote up some of that woman-knowledge that Rush has– http://pandagon.net/2006/01/14/pig-in-a-filth-ridden-blanket/
Marie certainly looks like the type who “actually wish”es to be sexually harrassed, doncha think? Perfect eye-candy.

ps-in case you are dim, I am joking: I don’t believe ANY healthy woman wants harrassment, sexual or otherwise.

V-Ben’s troublesome t-zone really shows up in the colour pic. Marie has lovely skin. This is a match made in heaven…well, Far From Heaven, maybe, but still…

They are the anti-Branjolina. Call them Ben-Marie, or Brie. Or Nyarlathotep. In any case, their union must occur in order to restore the balance to the universe that was disturbed when Brad and Anjolina decided to have a baby.

Hysterical Woman- I dunno. Ben took a pretty strong stance against masturbation in Porn Generation.

He also took a strong stance against porn in that book, and he watched tons of it for research. Okay, maybe not stuff we might think of as porn, but stuff a shelthered Orthodox Jewish boy would think of as porn (Cheese burgers held by a skinny shiska).

Marie OSMOND! Wow! I though she was sharing a cryrogenic closet with Walt Disney by now.
Or surely some of Larry King’s blond, shiksa ex-wives are available–and they are almost certainly still virgins.

Did I tell you I knew Ben before he was a virgin? He was voted “most likely to lactate” at Exeter.

Hmm . . . Marie’s comments could be interpreted to mean that real women go around deflowering virgins . . . interesting . . .

Marie Jon, please deflower me, you hot wench. I’d willingly listen to your absurd political ideas if you will give me your body. Don’t throw yourself away on that loser Ben Shapiro. Sure, I realize that in a few years he’ll be making $1-200,00 a year at some corporate law/lobbying firm. But where’s the L-U-V love, baby?

Marie’s already picturing herself as the long-suffering but devoted wife who sticks by her man after numerous indictments. Ben’s first is scheduled for 2012.

…sorry…sex and love don’t come to close to buying Marie the automatic ticket to heaven that kind of martyrdom will give her.

Besides, She and Ben are already planning to share the pool boys.

Share my ass- Rodrigo is mi-
Er… I mean, that’s gross, ewwww, gay sex is icky.

Great looking couple. After all Marie keeps the Sabbath. There is hope for the guy after all. If Ben does not ask her out I’ll believe positively he might be limp wrist!

Did you hear Mayor C. Ray Nagin say God is mad are blacks? Oh no he also sounds like Reverend. Pat Robertson. He also said a racist remark about New Orleans is an all chocolate city. What’s with that? I guess only the far- left get to be prophets of God and bigots without being sanctioned by the far – left media.
Go google.com

Naah. I say VBen must remain VBen… until he snaps, and goes postal somewhere. Perhaps, even a post office. Of course, with my luck, somehow I’ll be the unfortunate sap standing in line in front of him when he whips out his Uzi and… and I mean a real one, not Lil’ Ben, you perverts. That wouldn’t scare me… it might make me laugh a little bit, or throw-up in my mouth a little….
…um…
How do I get sidetracked so easily?

grrr.
“Perhaps, even at a post office.”

Fear not, Marq- I doubt VBen can shoot worth a damn. Good (sheltered) urban orthodox Jewish boys probably don’t get out to the range much, and an Uzi ain’t exactly an accurate weapon, ‘specially in a onehanded grip (even a Mini-Uzi is better used with the stock in handgrip position). Chances are he’d pull the trigger and recoil would cause him to expend most of the magazine into the ceiling.

Chances are he’d pull the trigger and recoil would cause him to expend most of the magazine into the ceiling.

He *wishes* he could hit the ceiling…

Precisely.
It’s not like he’s fucking Mossad!
Unless… nah, couldn’t be.

Also, is it just me, or does VBen appear to have had a unibrow which he has shaven the middle bit out of to simulate having the two eyebrows? Weird.