Mr. Some-imagine, meet Mr. Few-had

Everyone else has yoinked onto this already, but here’s Jonah at Townhall.com singin’ that Duran Duran late-career fave, ‘Too Much Information’:

While my undergraduate experience was not exactly the late-night Cinemax adventure some imagine when they hear that there was a roughly 30-to-1 female-to-male student ratio, I did find the experience rewarding on several fronts.

A ratio of 30-1?

Worst. Sexual History. 3V@R!!1!!!!111!!eleventyone11!!!

My alma mater had a ratio of about 1.2:1, and you grabbed on and rode that .2, man. Over 4 years, that yielded large dividends.

Are pictures working yet? Can we post that pic of Jonah with Kennedy at that MTV thing — the one where he’s holding the microphone like it’s a boinky wiener in his lap?

Nah, too depressing. 30-1. Jeez.

 

Comments: 14

 
 
 

Finally I am jealous of Jonah for one single thing. But am I really? I have the feeling that I only want to be in the club where Jonah could not be a member, but something tells me that there are more clubs that would take a squishy layabout playboy than would take a human stick figure lowest form of nerd possible- the kind other nerds look down upon, the un-nerdly nerd. Why couldn’t I have been more nerdly! Or squishier? Or more layabout-ish?

 
 

Are pictures working yet? Can we post that pic of Jonah with Kennedy at that MTV thing

The answers are yes and no.

 
 

His attempts to pass himself off as the “Fifth Duke of Cleveland” didn’t help much.

 
 

My alma mater had a 1.5-to-1 ratio, made all the sweeter by the knowledge that the ratio at our cross-state rival school was closer to 0.6-to-1.

Made it a bit more palatable when they beat us in football.

 
 

There a joke about masturbating while eating Cheetos in that sexual history somewhere.

 
 

It was the only sexual experience that I can honestly say smelled like yeasty rising sourdough.

 
 

The ratio could have been 60:1 and Jonah still wouldn’t have gotten any play.

 
 

was not exactly the late-night Cinemax adventure some imagine

Thwartalicious! That tidbit tells us everything we need to know about why he chose Goucher, and that he left it a beaten man. So to speak.

 
ambidextrous_girl
 

This hurt me. Why oh why did I click the link?

I liked this line in his column though, he’s clearly unaware of ‘alternative’ ways to read it:
“I think it’s a great book, and I truly would not say so if I thought otherwise.”

 
 

My first college had about a 1 to 2.5 ratio, so to achieve any kind of dating episodes at all, you had to be pretty aggressive and/or inventive to begin with.

30 to 1? I would have been friggin KING. Or at least Wilt Chamberlain.

Jonah’s a putz.

 
 

Well, the important stat is the ratio of hot chicks to guys.

 
 

I would think that someone with such weird mother issues wouldn’t be attending a school with a 30-1 female/male ratio.

I also see why Jonah took so much umbrage about Digby’s purporting definiton of becoming a man (fighting in a war or getting laid A LOT). see http://digbysblog.blogspot.com/2006_01_08_digbysblog_archive.html#113691469969412456

 
 

Thing is, when you’ve got that large a female majority, the girls are fully capable of getting together and developing a mind-melded collective sneer about a guy.

Sure, going to an all-girl school can make nubile young women crazy – –

– – but not that crazy.

Former girls’ college attendee,
Li’l Innocent

 
 

The girls’ verdict was that Jonah had every quality of a dog, but loyalty.

 
 

(comments are closed)