Full metal wingnut

gaffney_atlas_mooslim

Frank Gaffney really ups his game in his latest Mooney Times op-ed. It will be hard for other wingnuts to keep up:

GAFFNEY: America’s first Muslim president?

As you can see, the title alone is enough to merit this piece consideration for the Wingnut Hall of Fame. The content is even better:

During his White House years, William Jefferson Clinton — someone Judge Sonia Sotomayor might call a “white male” — was dubbed “America’s first black president” by a black admirer. Applying the standard of identity politics and pandering to a special interest that earned Mr. Clinton that distinction, Barack Hussein Obama would have to be considered America’s first Muslim president.

Pretty good stuff so far. But you may be wondering: since Gaffney has called Obama a Muslim in the very first graf of his column, is there anywhere else he can go? Will he pull out the tried-and-true Hitler comparison in the second graf? As it turns out, yes he will:

This is not to say, necessarily, that Mr. Obama actually is a Muslim any more than Mr. Clinton actually is black. After his five months in office, and most especially after his just-concluded visit to Saudi Arabia and Egypt, however, a stunning conclusion seems increasingly plausible: The man now happy to have his Islamic-rooted middle name featured prominently has engaged in the most consequential bait-and-switch since Adolf Hitler duped Neville Chamberlain over Czechoslovakia at Munich.

Gaffney ends his piece with a rhetorical flourish by suggesting that Obama’s overtures to the Muslim world have set the stage for America’s mass submission to Islam:

Whether Mr. Obama actually is a Muslim or simply plays one in the presidency may, in the end, be irrelevant. What is alarming is that in aligning himself and his policies with those of Shariah-adherents such as the Muslim Brotherhood, the president will greatly intensify the already enormous pressure on peaceful, tolerant American Muslims to submit to such forces – and heighten expectations, here and abroad, that the rest of us will do so as well.

Wingnuts across America, consider yourselves put on notice. Frank Gaffney has impressively raised the bar for crazy in this column. This is the new standard toward which you must aspire.

 

Comments: 152

 
 
 

The man now happy to have his Islamic-rooted middle name featured prominently has engaged in the most consequential bait-and-switch since Adolf Hitler duped Neville Chamberlain over Czechoslovakia at Munich.

So he’s saying that Obama duped the Muslim world.

Is that a bad thing?

 
 

Aw rats. I had June 18 in the “Full Metal Muslim” pool.

We’ll have to be puttin’ em down like Old Yeller by Labor Day at this rate.

 
 

Wow! Hitler, Clinton, Moses, Jesus, Sotomayer, Muhammad, Jeremiah A. Wright, the Muslim Brotherhood, Hamas, children of Abraham, Shariah and the Association of Community Organizers for Reform Now (ACORN), all in one column.

Well, just give up, President Obama. Frank J. Gaffney Jr. whipped your hide, but good.

 
 

We’ll have to be puttin’ em down like Old Yeller by Labor Day at this rate.

Is that a hard opening date on wingnut season? I was thinking we may have to start thinning the herd already.

 
 

Frank Gaffney’s going to start a burqua-boutique.

 
 

“Whether Mr. Obama actually is a Muslim or simply plays one in the presidency may, in the end, be irrelevant.”

“Indeed, whether any of the conjecture, hyperbole, distortion, or innuendo in the present editorial is accurate, or simply the ludicrous attempts by the present writer to flahbbah blabbah FLOOMBAH! FLOOMBAH! yahhh-BOOBIDTY BAH BAH! ‘analysis,’ only time will tell.”

 
 

… “revealed” is a depiction Muslims use to reflect their conviction that the Koran is the word of God, as dictated to Muhammad.

And it is a depiction atheists use to reflect their conviction that religious mumbo-jumbo is insane batshittery.

So the fuck what?

 
 

The man now happy to have his Islamic-rooted middle name featured prominently

Yes, and after all that trouble Gaffney and his ilk took to keep it a secret.

 
 

There’s no question that we have several tons of high quality crazy spread through that article, but c’mon guys. 0.1 point deduction for talking about an Obama speech without mentioning teleprompters. 0.1 deduction for talking about terrorism and Obama without mentioning William Ayers. At least 0.3 point deduction for mentioning Indonesia without at least hinting that Obama isn’t a “natural born citizen.” Birth Certificate, people. Birth Certificate…

And that’s just point deductions in the “compulsories” part of the competition. There’s lots of room for improvement in the free rant as well.

I say 8.2/10 tops. We aren’t going to see wingnuttery reach its true potential if we hand out perfect 10’s like candy. No more grade inflation!

 
 

Wow. Republicans are going to be apologizing to Gaffney soon, if he keeps this up.

 
 

Note to Newspaper Editors: If one of your columnists turns in something that looks like the half-considered, ahistorical, ill-informed, semicoherent ramblings you can find at Big Hollywood, you need smarter wignuts.

 
 

Applying the standard of identity politics and pandering to a special interest that earned Mr. Clinton that distinction, Barack Hussein Obama would have to be considered America’s first Muslim president.

Alweays back to the Clenis in some for or other for these people.

Cripes, Frank! If you love Mr. Clinton that much why don’t you get married?

oh, wait, you can’t. Oh well.

 
 

“• Mr. Obama referred four times in his speech to “the Holy Koran.” Non-Muslims — even pandering ones — generally don’t use that Islamic formulation.

• Mr. Obama established his firsthand knowledge of Islam (albeit without mentioning his reported upbringing in the faith) with the statement, “I have known Islam on three continents before coming to the region where it was first revealed.” Again, “revealed” is a depiction Muslims use to reflect their conviction that the Koran is the word of God, as dictated to Muhammad.”

Waiddaminute, how does Gaffney know this? Is he hiding something?

(I’m suggesting that he is a Muslim – mind – just heavily implying it.)

 
 

He’s not so much raising the bar as he is condensing the entire wingnut-o-sphere of the last twelve months into one post. It’s just a high concentration, not anything particularly new.

So Gaffney isn’t an innovator. He’s just a moron without an original thought in his head.

 
 

Again, “revealed” is a depiction Muslims use to reflect their conviction that the Koran is the word of God, as dictated to Muhammad.

As opposed of course to Christians, who never use “revealed” or any of its formulations in religious thought.

 
Ted the Slacker
 

Wingnut fact about Obama:

“[he was a Mooslim until] he became a Christian as an adult in Chicago, under the now-notorious Pastor Jeremiah A. Wright.”

Who knew?

And your daily Dough:

If a judge believes X, but rules in accordance with the law which denies X, the judge is a hypocrite.

Gaffney may be vault copy nuts, but Dough rarely misses an opportunity to highlight a glaringly obvious reality and draw a completely bug-fuck stupid conclusion. Hey, when it rains, there are clouds in the sky, so when there are clouds in the sky, I must wear hip-waders.

Can’t decide if the Literalist Wingnut or Postmodern Wingnut is setting a more challenging bar, but they are both trying awfully hard.

 
 

Again, “revealed” is a depiction Muslims use to reflect their conviction that the Koran is the word of God, as dictated to Muhammad.”

Frank is miffed that Obama used words reflecting Muslim sensibilities when he spoke about Islam, instead of calling them towel-head fanatics and a religion of hate – the way ‘Mericans are supposed to talk about Islam.

 
 

William Jefferson Clinton — someone Judge Sonia Sotomayor might call a “white male”

It’s just that kind of attention to easily missed detail that we need in a Supreme Court justice.

 
 

If a judge believes X, but rules in accordance with the law which denies X, the judge is a hypocrite.

But if a judge believes X and rules in favor of X despite clear law which denies X, that would be OK?

 
 

Oh, Jonah, Jonah:

If an Irish judge gave a speech to the Ancient Order of Hibernians and dabbled in a bit of excessive Irish pride, it might be inappropriate but it wouldn’t be disqualifying. But if there was evidence that he gave preference to Irish plaintiffs out of “empathy,” I would like to think that would get him in serious trouble.

But if the judge gave preference to plaintiffs because they contributed to his election campaign, that would be all right with Jonah!

 
 

Waiddaminute, how does Gaffney know this? Is he hiding something?

(I’m suggesting that he is a Muslim – mind – just heavily implying it.)

It would be irresponsible not to speculate.

 
Screamin' Demon
 

Now that’s one big heapin’, steamin’ bowl full o’ Campbell’s Crazy Noodle Soup. I can just hear wingnuts from coast to coast chanting “Um Um, Good!”

 
 

But if there was evidence that he gave preference to Irish plaintiffs out of “empathy,” I would like to think that would get him in serious trouble.

And ye’d be wrong, boy-o, because we all know there’s an old boy network.

 
Ted the Slacker
 

But if a judge believes X and rules in favor of X despite clear law which denies X, that would be OK?

Nyet, no trick questions allowed.

(1) Not OK – If a libruhl judge does it, cos that’s judicial activism.
(2) OK – If a manly Federalist Society judge does it, cos that’s strict contructionism

Situational ethics etc etc, central TO MY POINT.

 
 

OT, a bit, but when I read this post’s title, my first take was Full MENTAL wingnut. Which is a redundant phrase. Then I re-read…

 
You Can't Put Lipstick On A Repig
 

I thought this was old news for the deranged (AKA, all of them) wingnuts. Hasn’t Obama been a closet Muslim since about 3 seconds after he declared interest in running for President back in 2006 or 2007?

 
Rusty Shackleford
 

Referring to African-Americans as a “special interest” is an excellent way to bring them into the Republican fold.

 
 

God, their attacks are so boring and tired, I’m almost to the point of welcoming a terrorist attack just so they’ll have something new to whine and shit their pants about.

 
Xecky Gilchrist
 

my first take was Full MENTAL wingnut. Which is a redundant phrase. Then I re-read…

I’m intrigued by the “full metal X” construction popping up everywhere – I do see it a lot on blogs these days. Is it a conflation of the “full retard” concept from Tropic Thunder and the title of Full Metal Jacket?

 
You Can't Put Lipstick On A Repig
 

If a judge believes X, but rules in accordance with the law which denies X, the judge is a hypocrite.

If that is really what Pantload believes, he doesn’t even know the most basic definition of the noun Judge, or of the verb judge.

The peabrain-edness of Pantload gets proven over and over. His bottomless well of stoopid-tood never dries up.

 
 

Applying the standard of identity politics and pandering to a special interest that earned Mr. Clinton that distinction…

Because black people are a special interest.

Actually the first president to be called a black president was Abraham Lincoln, because he also shamelessly pandered to special interests.

 
 

“It would be irresponsible not to speculate.”

We’ll let someone else express it in VERY LARGE, BOLD TYPE and then link to it with a thoughtful “…interesting.”

Pamela?

 
 

Actually the first president to be called a black president was Abraham Lincoln Thomas Jefferson, because he also shamelessly pandered to special miscegenist interests.

Fixed!

 
 

We’ll let someone else express it in VERY LARGE, BOLD TYPE and then link to it with a thoughtful “…interesting.”

Pamela?

HEH! Indeed…

 
 

We’ll let someone else express it in VERY LARGE, BOLD TYPE and then link to it with a thoughtful “…interesting.”

Pamela?

HEH! Indeed…

 
 

Because black people are a special interest.

Of course!

Any political interest beyond that of rich white males = “special interest”.

 
 

I’m almost to the point of welcoming a terrorist attack just so they’ll have something new to whine and shit their pants about.

And if, God forbid, there is one, they’ll immediately drop their spiteful slanders and rally around Obama the way the country rallied around Bush after 9/11, right?

Right?

[crickets]

 
Bill E Pilgrim
 

Wow. Republicans are going to be apologizing to Gaffney soon, if he keeps this up.

Best line so far.

Yes, can’t you all see? By speaking respectfully to moderate Muslims, President Obama has made them more likely to embrace extremism!

It’s all so simple if you just think like they do. Backwards.

 
 

OT (sort of) Ed Whelan apologizes.

Boy. That was like closing the barn door after letting the horses out…into a field of hungry lions.

 
 

Geez, Whelan, if you’re going to be an asshole, at least have the courage of your asshole convictions.

 
 

WAIT!

Has there been an addition to the photo? Has the Cairo Swordsman from Raider of the Lost Ark snuck into frame???

What will happen to “Idaho” Gaffney (a nickname AND a descriptive sentence!) and his sidekick “Tits” Mahoney, I mean, Pam Gellar?

 
The Kid from Kounty Meath
 

I am concerned that Tits Mahoney may give preference to Irish plaintiffs out of empathy.

 
You Can't Put Lipstick On A Repig
 

Has there been an addition to the photo? Has the Cairo Swordsman from Raider of the Lost Ark snuck into frame???

Oh you ruined my fun! I thought my Refresh button had magical powers.

 
 

Shorter Ross Douthat: If everyone followed the example I set in this column and invented an absurd position, attributed it to their opponents, and then shot it down, the debate around abortion would be greatly improved.

 
 

http://corner.nationalreview.com/post/?q=NzI5ODlmYjI4YTYwMDQ3YTYwYTdmNGVhMDY2YTQwMWY=

from Pantload’s paean to hypocrisy:

Would judge Sotomayor be your first pick in a lawsuit against a Puerto Rican organization if your livelihood was on the line?

I can haz pick of judgez?

 
 

Wow. I like Ed Whelan even less after reading his slinking apology.

That man is an ass.

That was some Grade A Bolivian Blue-Flake Wingnuttery, but I think they can do better. They can always do better.

 
The Goddamn Batman Doesn't Have To Use A Whistle To Summon Ace The Goddamn Bathound; He Just Poses, And Ace Stops Humping Alfred's Leg And Comes Running
 

See, the likes of Gaffney are so accustomed to W dogwhistling in the faithful, they’ve started to hear it coming from any politician–a sort of mental tinnitus. (They do a fair amount of dogwhistling themselves, of course, as is obvious from the picture that you posted.)

 
 

Stay tuned folks, next week Frank Gaffney will host Stu Rothenberg on his next podcast to talk about the dangerous leftwing drift of the mainstream media.

-G

 
Rusty Shackleford
 

I can haz pick of judgez?

Doughpants has apparently never heard of forum-shopping.

 
 

Would judge Sotomayor be your first pick in a lawsuit against a Puerto Rican organization if your livelihood was on the line?

Would Clarence Thomas?

 
You Can't Put Lipstick On A Repig
 

Would Clarence Thomas?

“Your honor, I would like to invoke the Pubic Hair defense”

 
 

http://www.brehonlaw.org/

Céad míle fáil, Doughbob. Ya feckin, gombeen.
You think those people don’t look out for each other in various ways? Also, my full deck of Emerald Society PBA cards, let me show you them and explain to you how without them and with the way I drive, like I’m Goggles Paesano with his ass on fire, I’d be a suspended license having, walking and bus taking all the time motherfucker. I’m not proud of all this but people like Doughbob want to pretend that it don’t be that way but it do./oscargamble.

 
 

Obama’s overtures to the Muslim world have set the stage for America’s mass submission to Islam:

The wingers sure are obsessed with the possibility of forced submission to Islam. Must have something to do with all that bowing, those pretty robes they wear, the Arab custom of holding hands with your male friends …

 
 

The wingers sure are obsessed with the possibility of forced submission to Islam. Must have something to do with all that bowing, those pretty robes they wear, the Arab custom of holding hands with your male friends …

They’re waiting for the ballgag hijab before they submit.

 
 

Again, for the record: Hitler was, in fact, seriously pissed off when Munich deprived him of his casus belli, and Chamberlain’s insistence on making Poland, not the Sudetenland, the sticking point gave Britain the time it needed to mobilize. In the event he had little choice, anyway, since neither France nor the Soviets were willing to go to war over a piece of Czechoslovakia. The Appeasement business is the worst sort of hindsight.

Also, fuck Frank Gaffney.

 
 

Is it me or does Pammycakes look more and more like a drag queen with each passing day?

 
Scared spitless and fully aware there is a long and publically accessible record of my stupidity and fear
 

ME TOO! ME TOO!

Bushitting Republican for LIFE!!!

 
The Tragically Flip
 

The angle of Obama being the “muslim” President in the way Clinton was the “black” President is new and original.

See, he didn’t say Obama was himself an adherent of Islam, just that he panders to filthy mohammedians so much he is like some kind of honourary terrorist.

Now he can run around calling Obama a muslim and claim he is being ironic, and we square leftists just aren’t hip enough to catch his soaring wit.

This is some 3-michelin star wingnuttery. Plausible deniability, and the mouth breathers will never get the subtlty, and aren’t meant to. They think he is an actual, real Muslim, and Gaffney can feed that certainty while maintaing a plausible veneer of sophist deniability.

 
You Can't Put Lipstick On A Repig
 

Also, my full deck of Emerald Society PBA cards

Many, many moons ago (late 80s) I made friends with a SgtDet when I worked in a capacity for NYC. He liked me a bunch (no, no, not that) and one day handed me a “Sargeant’s Benevolent Society Card”. He told me these things are like gold, and that even the officers (Lt & above) wanted them, but the Sgt’s hoarded them like rare art works.

I used it jsut 3 times, all for minor things. I cannot exaggerate the effect this thing had on officers whom I ran afoul of. They didn’t just stop writing me a ticket, they started talking to me like I was an old friend.

 
 

From Poolitico:

He’s done it while talking about abortion and the Middle East, even the economy. The references serve at once as an affirmation of his faith and a rebuke against a rumor that persists for some to this day.

As president, Barack Obama has mentioned Jesus Christ in a number of high-profile public speeches — something his predecessor George W. Bush rarely did in such settings, even though Bush’s Christian faith was at the core of his political identity.

ITZ A TRAP!!

 
 

Whether Mr. Gagfney actually enjoys drinking donkey piss from used condoms or simply plays with with himself hourly, his irrelevancy is assured.

 
 

Literalist Wingnut or Postmodern Wingnut

Stream of barely consciousness?

 
 

“I can haz pick of judgez?”

Stay-Puff Goldberg expects Sotomayor to arrive July 13th wearing a sombrero, strapped in bullets with her six-shooters in tow.

 
 

Stay-Puff Goldberg expects Sotomayor to arrive July 13th wearing a sombrero, strapped in bullets with her six-shooters in tow.

Ai-yai-yai, whare is d’ Corte Esupremo, senor?”

 
a concerned citizen
 

Is it me or does Pammycakes look more and more like a drag queen with each passing day?

The most consequential bait-and-switch since a transvestite hooker duped me over $20 at the Newark bus station.

 
 

Stay-Puff Goldberg expects Sotomayor to arrive July 13th wearing a sombrero, strapped in bullets with her six-shooters in tow.

Yudges? We ain got no yudges…we don need no badges…I don have to show you no steenken yudges, you goddamned cabron and ching’tu madre!

 
 

The most consequential bait-and-switch since a transvestite hooker duped me over $20 at the Newark bus station.

Hey, man, I had a chance to buy Citicorp stock cheap…

 
 

Yudges? We ain got no yudges…we don need no badges…I don have to show you no steenken yudges, you goddamned cabron and ching’tu madre!

I hate when I carefully set up an entire bit and then fuck it up with an inconsistent meme…

 
 

Cheech y Chong y Sotomayor!

 
 

Save that one for the Golden Wingnuts.

 
You Can't Put Lipstick On A Repig
 

Hey, man, I had a chance to buy Citicorp stock cheap…

It’s still ridiculously cheap if you check out the options pricing on that puppy. (hint hint)

 
 

All of this politically correct pandering to mohammedans by the American Government needs to stop. Refering to Islam as a “religion of peace”, and to America as a “mohammedan nation” is just off the charts crazy and should not be spoken by Our Nation’s Government Officials.

Even President Bush was guilty of this politically correct pandering. For example, changing the name of the Afghan war from Operation Infinite Justice to Operation Enduring Freedom, order to placate the mohammedans on their belief that only allah can provide infinite justice, is just insane, and only serves to make America look weak in our enemies eyes.

Contrast this with Presidents John Adams and Thomas Jefferson in their wars against the Barbary Pirates. In private correspondence they repeatedly refered to America as a Christian Nation, and the American public in general, considered the war to be one of a Christian America against a savage mohammedan enemy. President Adams and other American officials even refered to muslims as mohammedans and musselmen, words our spineless government officials would never speak today.

Unless we know what this war is, one between the White Christian West and the mohammedan terrorist religion, then our people will be left in the dark as to the historical and cultural importance of this war, and even more regretedly of the history and culture of our White Christian Nation and Civilization.

 
 

Would judge Sotomayor be your first pick in a lawsuit against a Puerto Rican organization if your livelihood was on the line?

If the great big mean Puerto Rican organization has wronged sweet little old me by behaving illegally, then yes? It’s almost as if these guys don’t really know what empathy means… hint: it’s not ignoring the evidence and favoring whoever is most similar to yourself, even if they are the guilty party.

 
 

It’s almost as if these guys don’t really know what empathy means… hint: it’s not ignoring the evidence and favoring whoever is most similar to yourself, even if they are the guilty party.

See, here’s the thing: they don’t want to admit that’s precisely how things work when it’s their old white guys who are sitting on the bench because that would admit that the system we’ve lived with for one hundred and fifty years was corrupt (as well in the past 50 but decliningly so).

 
 

That Gaffney has always been a rotten stinking liar. He should not be allowed on self-respecting news outlets.

 
The Very Reverend Battleaxe of Knowledge
 

Isn’t “Submission to Islam” redundant? Like “Shrimp Scampi?”

 
 

Would judge Sotomayor be your first pick in a lawsuit against a Puerto Rican organization if your livelihood was on the line?

Matthew J. Franck floated this crap in response to the Supreme Court’s decision on the judge in West Virginia.

 
Rusty Shackleford
 

From Doughload:

Since the email keeps coming in (though largely prompted by bloggers elsewhere) I thought I’d just clarify my own position on all this.

Because of the giant shit that the world gives.

 
 

That Gaffney has always been a rotten stinking liar. He should not be allowed on self-respecting news outlets.

Any “news” outlet that welcomes him, would, by definition, lack any self respect.

 
 

I keep hoping the swordsman in the picture will get closer.

 
 

I cannot exaggerate the effect this thing had on officers whom I ran afoul of.

Will no-one help the widow’s son??!

 
 

Alternate, not-much-shorter Gaffney: Hey, remember when that black writer chick said Clinton was the first black president? Has any prominent Muslim person said the same about Obama? No? Fuck it, I’ll just use the Angelou thing.

 
 

Why on Earth would Franck think of Sotomayor over, say, Scalia? Or Roberts? Why is it they act as if only women and minorities are influenced by identity group membership, and so strongly as to be incapable of resisting? White and male is not the damn default mode from which everything else is at variance, for fuck’s sake. Also, maybe the reason there’s not a whole slew of precedents is that most judges have the good sense* to recuse themselves when they should rather than forcing it to the Supreme Court.

*good sense/recusal certificate offer not valid for Scalia.

 
 

Quoting Jonah….

And, I think I probably made it easier for some to distort my intent by being sloppy.

And thus we have summed up in 16 words the totality of Jonah’s writing career, including “Liberal Fascism: The World According To Blart.”

 
 

Why on Earth would Franck think of Sotomayor over, say, Scalia? Or Roberts? Why is it they act as if only women and minorities are influenced by identity group membership, and so strongly as to be incapable of resisting?

As I said at the time it was revealed, I’ll denounce Sotomayor for her membership in La Raza the minute Alito and Scalia resign from the Knights of Columbus, and Roberts from the Hibernian Society

(I note that Fudgie picked up on this thought in his post earlier today…you don’t suppose…*?)

* first ellipse non-ominous (nominous). second intentionally ominous.

 
 

I keep hoping the swordsman in the picture will get closer.
Like this?

 
 

I keep hoping the swordsman in the picture will get closer.
Like this?

Me no like reading!

 
 

It’s almost as if these guys don’t really know what empathy means… hint: it’s not ignoring the evidence and favoring whoever is most similar to yourself, even if they are the guilty party.

They seem to be mixing up “sympathy” and “empathy”.

 
bulbul, teh former Czechoslovakian
 

Adolf Hitler duped Neville Chamberlain over Czechoslovakia
Except, you know, Chamberlain didn’t get duped, Hitler did. Hitler was forced to be all diplomatic and legal and shit and it made him pretty angry. Sounds like anyone we know?
Chamberlain got pretty much what he wanted. The fact that he misread Hitler and was generally a short-sighted asshole, that’s a different thing.

 
bulbul, teh former Czechoslovakian
 

They seem to be mixing up “sympathy” and “empathy”.
Potato-tomato. They wouldn’t know what any of that shit is.

And while we’re at it, I wanna get a shout out to my peeps – give it up for congruence and unconditional positive regard, yo!

 
 

Yeah, I don’t think it’s as much sympathy as knee-jerk tribalism, but what do I know.

Now I gotta go read. Goddam story-linking bastards.

 
 

Pssst. Is Obama a giant Hitler robot made up of lots of Chamberlains, or a giant Chamberlain robot made up of lots of Hitlers? I wasn’t paying attention in class.

 
 

Hey, remember when that black writer chick said Clinton was the first black president? Has any prominent Muslim person said the same about Obama? No? Fuck it, I’ll just use the Angelou thing.

Maya Angelou, Toni Morrison, Florida Evans… is there really a difference?

 
 

Is Obama a giant Hitler robot made up of lots of Chamberlains, or a giant Chamberlain robot made up of lots of Hitlers?

Better than being a giant chamberbot.

 
 

Is Obama a giant Hitler robot made up of lots of Chamberlains

Mostly Hitlers, a few Stalins, a couple Maos and a old wood-burning steam Malcolm X.

 
 

From Jonah:

…anonymous insult-hurler who blogs under a pseudonym…

If there’s a bright center to the universe, you’re on the planet that it’s farthest from.

 
 


White and male is not the damn default mode from which everything else is at variance, for fuck’s sake.

well, er, yes, in fact, this is the case (in their minds). If you were to tell them this slowly and carefully, and that “white man” was an identity just like a gay black man or a latina, you would see the words travel towards their ears, then suddenly stop dead in the middle of the air and fall down. they would continue to look blankly at you.

 
 

President Adams and other American officials even refered to muslims as mohammedans and musselmen, words our spineless government officials would never speak today.

Yes, and our spineless government officials also don’t refer to scientists as “natural philosophers,” fingerprinting as “dactyloscopy” or automobiles as “horseless carriages.”

 
 

President Adams and other American officials even refered to muslims as mohammedans and musselmen, words our spineless government officials would never speak today.

Indeed, and they had a word for those folks whose skin is dark, too. They even had a special word for the children. They had another word for people from China. Why don’t our spineless government officials use perfectly good words like those?

 
 

“Adolf Hitler duped Neville Chamberlain over Czechoslovakia”. Right…he did it by constantly playing up his Czech roots in his speeches. And, unfortunately, it’s easy to mistake the Washington Times for a real newspaper, since they’re both printed in ink, on newsprint, and can both be used to line birdcages, though the Times is much more absorbent.

 
 

musselmen

Which makes the religion sound either like an excuse to hang out on the beach and flex, or centered around adhering your shell to a rock in a tide pool.

 
 

Frank Gaffney has impressively raised the bar for crazy in this column

and he looks so happy, standing next to his female equal.

 
 

he looks so happy, standing next to his female equal

Three boobs for the price of two!

 
 

musselmen

Danger! The blues has been infiltrated by a Musselman!

 
 

Let me know if you can figure this out.

Re: Getting healthier by the day! [Andy McCarthy]

Turns out: it’s not just me. Our buddy Steve Schippert reports that hope and change has come to … AL QAEDA!

Ayman Zawahiri announced today that, under the Recruitment Stimulus Initiative Insha Allah (RSIIA), the terror network has created or saved 10,000 jihadist jobs (resulting in a concurrent creation or saving of 720,000 virgins!).

Zawahiri added that al Qaeda has appointed an Explosive Czar. It has also taken over al-Shabaab in Somalia — although Zawahiri insists this is a temporary take-over because, with two wars to run, the last thing CEO Osama bin Laden wants to be doing right now is running a failing cell in Somalia.

06/09 06:41 PMShare

 
 

An Explosive Czar? They must have to replace him constantly. Stand back, kids — that czar is about to explode!

Or maybe he misspelled Exploding Cigar.

 
 

An Explosive Czar? They must have to replace him constantly. Stand back, kids — that czar is about to explode!

Did you get him a camel for the trip? Oh good. Wait, that’s not a camel, it’s a Pinto! NOOOOOOO!

 
 

Actually, he’d asked for an elephant, but his explosives didn’t all fit in the trunk.

 
The Kid from Kounty Meath
 

@g: I don’t think that’ll work on him. He does have a hyperlink to a white supremacist org in his name, after all.

 
 

now happy to have his Islamic-rooted middle name featured prominently …

Because a real Amurkan would have changed his middle name to “Reagan” or possibly “Jaysus” the moment he realized that being named after his Muslim grandfather would upset racist bigots. Yeah, that’s the ticket!

 
 

“Barack Jefferson Davis Obama”

 
 

If you were to tell them this slowly and carefully, and that “white man” was an identity just like a gay black man or a latina, you would see the words travel towards their ears, then suddenly stop dead in the middle of the air and fall down. they would continue to look blankly at you.

Every now and then, in the all-white parties that seem to be so common among San Francisco bohemian types, I refer to something as a “white thing.” This usually gets blank looks, followed by startled guffaws.

 
 

Our buddy Steve Schippert reports that hope and change has come to … AL QAEDA!

Oh, fcrissake.

In a world where blithering idiots like Andy were relegated to jobs they were more suited to – like pre-chewing chum for sharks – this news would be greeted with cries of “Look! They’re getting desperate! They know the President isn’t a walking recruiting poster for them anymore.” we get this jibberjab. “HUH HUH “hope and change” just like Barry Osama huh huh huh huh!”

It’s comments like his that make me with there was an HTML command to send repeated cockpunches through the Interwebs.

 
 

there should be an “instead” in front of “we get this jibberjab”. I blame society.

 
 

Every time I hit “refresh”, and the top of the page flashes by, I can’t help but read the title as “Full Fetal Wingnut”. Gotta be a joke there–maybe some riff on the militant “pro-life” wingers, I don’t know. I just got home from work and am too beat to think that hard.

Aren’t we about due for a new threadsky about now?

 
Rusty Shackleford
 

Aren’t we about due for a new threadsky about now?

Too early. New threads multiply like Palins in the middle of the night.

 
 

Mostly Hitlers, a few Stalins, a couple Maos and a old wood-burning steam Malcolm X.
I see your sly little ‘Stainless Steel Rat’ reference there.

 
 

From Majikthise, a crazy x-tian youtube featuring an x-tian Bob the Builder and even x-tian doughnuts. Theme: “I learned God bought us with his special money, the blood of Jesus.”

 
 

“I learned God bought us with his special money, the blood of Jesus.”

Funny coincidence; I’ll soon be reduced to paying for COBRA coverage with my own plasma.

 
 

OK, I’ve got it:

Full Fetal Jacket: (un)Born to Kill

I give up

 
Sprinkle On The Zesty Goodness
 

I think there is a pandemic occurring now, and officials aren’t willing to talk about it because it would create a panic, but my theory is this: there is a virus destroying people’s brains. Mutated mad cow disease, probably. And Republicans, who consume the most beef, statistically, are going mad in droves.

Think about this column as applied to any other president at any other time of crisis: Franklin Roosevelt during the Depression, John Adams negotiating peace with Britain, Kennedy during the Bay of Pigs. Seriously. This guy has a platform at one of America’s few remaining wide-circulation newspapers, and he’s stark staring insane. Not because he’s suggesting Obama is a Muslim — seeing as Obama could be, and it wouldn’t make any difference — but because he’s gibbering about this crazy shit in order to bring down a sitting president simply for being someone the correspondent doesn’t like.

Jesus H. Nutslap, if this is the kind of infantile rhetorical sleight-of-pants that passes for editorials these days, I gotta get me some chimpanzees and typewriters. I could have my own newspaper.

 
 

Dude, these are the exact same “people” who invented the term “Bush Derangement Syndrome” to describe anyone who pointed out any time Bush misspoke, or exaggerated, or gaffed.

Any self-awareness on their part would make their heads all splodey.

 
 

Ha! I remember the Donut Man! But my all time favorite was The Gospel Bill Show which helped to train me for the coming jihad

 
Creigh Deeds--Too Liberal for Virginia
 

The Democrat Party has just nominated a tax-raising, Obama boot licking, pro-abort lackey to be Governor of Virginia.

A man who voted to raise the gas tax. Raise the sales tax. Raise the income tax. He voted for the biggest tax increase in state history. Deeds also holds radical, radical pro-abort policies.

Higher taxes. More spending. Bigger Government. Radical pro-abort policies.

That’s Creigh Deeds.

2009 will be a referrendum on Obama, and we’re going to make Obama Deeds running mate!

Same with Corzine in New Jersey. They’re going down!

 
St. Xecklothxayyquou Gilchrist
 

2009 will be a referrendum on Obama, and we’re going to make Obama Deeds running mate! Same with Corzine in New Jersey. They’re going down!

Bookmark it, libs, Tedisco wiiiiiiiiiins!

 
 

I was at the Obama boot licking party, but nobody was paying any attention to Barack. Now Michelle, there is a woman who knows how to wear a pair of boots! Condi was shitting herself with envy.

 
 

Deeds is the most gun-nutty nut in the Democratic party, but whatevs.

 
 

Obama boot licking

OK, I try to make it a policy not to respond to trolls, but I can’t resist 2 questions:

1. Did you ever, in the last 8 years, use the term “Bush Derangement Syndrome”?

2. Will you now cop to a case of “Obama Derangement Syndrome”?

Wet clean up, aisle 6!

 
Creigh Deeds--Too Liberal for Virginia
 

Did you ever say, during the past eight years, “Dissent is the Highest form of Patriotism”? Hmmm? Whatever happened to that?

 
 

Creigh Deeds- too liberal for the Virginia that Obama was the first democrat to carry since LBJ, (by 8 points) and the Virginia that threw out George Allen and Virgil Goode in favor of two guys who had never run for office before.
That’s the ultra-liberal Creigh Deeds who authored the Virginia Hunting and Fishing as a constitutional right amendment.
dumb troll

 
 

Creigh Deeds- too liberal for the Virginia with two democratic senators.

 
You Can't Put Lipstick On A Repig
 

2. Will you now cop to a case of “Obama Derangement Syndrome”?

I have seen enough of the deranged wingnut replies on blog to know exactly how they respond to this charge of hypocrisy:

“Obama is an anti-American commie muzzie who isn’t even really the president because he wasn’t born in America so we can slander him as much as we want, and we won’t feel the slightest twinge of any guilt or hypocrisy at all”

Of course, in addition to the other 21,232,377 things concerning reality they are completely clueless about, their complete ignorance of their hypocrisy is what DEFINES hypocrisy.

 
 

I’m thinking Christie will probably win in NJ over Corzine, but I’m glad that Christie and not Steve “Spanish Billboard Hissy Fit” Lonegan won the nomination, because while Christie is a Republican, Lonegan is both a Republican and a total idiot.

 
 

Non-responsive answer, Your Honor, I move that the Troll’s remarks be stricken from the record. How about it, loozer, are you now, or have you ever been, a member of the Obama-hater’s club? C’mon, fess up–I’ll gladly cop to hating Bush’s shriveled black guts from the first time I had to watch his frat-boy smirk on TV.

 
 

Get ready for the inevitable:

Here is how it will go down in November. First, the results from Rockbridge and Tazewell Counties will come in, and they’ll be declared for McDonnell. You’ll be disappointed, but “no big deal, victory can’t come overnight” will be your comment. Roanoke will go red, and a little nervousness will creep in. The usual suspects will fall into the usual categories. As the night drags on, Norfolk, Richmond, and (much to your horror) Fairfax will be too close to call.

My advice at this point to you will be to go to bed. You will wake up to a McDonnell governorship and the Great Liberal Freakout will be on.

Bookmark this, liberals, as this is exactly how it is going to go down. You will be wonder how the hell I was able to call this.

Lather, rinse, repeat.

 
 

Ooh, county names. That’s the extra mile I expect my parody troll posts to go to.

 
Creigh Deeds--Too Liberal for Virginia
 

All those races were flukes, Honos.

 
 

Ooh, county names. That’s the extra mile I expect my parody troll posts to go to.

Anything to shove it in the face down the throat up the butt of the REAL Troofie.

 
The Troof's Mom--Too Liberal For The Cool Guy In Her Basement
 

All this “prior precedent” and “facts” and “sense” don’t matter, because conservativism never fails, it can only be failed. Gingrich/Brown Catholic Guy or Alaska Lady 2012!

 
 

Oppress my toast, libs!

 
johnny cacahuates
 

Why is dude standing next to the Dukes of Hazzard chick?

 
 

I love the fruity “Hmmmm?” version of Troofie. Whenever he types “Hmmmm?” I imagine him saying it with one hand rested on a sideways-thrusted hip, perhaps performing a swishy “whatever, girlfriend” flourish with the other.

 
 

Whenever he types “Hmmmm?” I imagine him saying it with one hand rested on a sideways-thrusted hip, perhaps performing a swishy “whatever, girlfriend” flourish with the other.

I’ve never imagined him any other way.

 
 

Jim Treacher Edit commentDelete comment Wednesday, June 10, 2009 – 02:13:55 AM

Jim Treacher Edit commentDelete comment Wednesday, June 10, 2009 – 03:08:46 AM

Jim Treacher Edit commentDelete comment Wednesday, June 10, 2009 – 03:30:10 AM

Jim Treacher Edit commentDelete comment Wednesday, June 10, 2009 – 05:35:51 AM

Jim Treacher Edit commentDelete comment Wednesday, June 10, 2009 – 05:38:20 AM

Jim Treacher Edit commentDelete comment Wednesday, June 10, 2009 – 06:02:32 AM

Jim Treacher Edit commentDelete comment Wednesday, June 10, 2009 – 06:21:10 AM

Jim Treacher Edit commentDelete comment Wednesday, June 10, 2009 – 06:43:42 AM

He started at June 9th, 2009 at 10:21 pm at Juan Cole’s place.

And he’s still there.

 
 

I love the fruity “Hmmmm?” version of Troofie. Whenever he types “Hmmmm?” I imagine him saying it with one hand rested on a sideways-thrusted hip, perhaps performing a swishy “whatever, girlfriend” flourish with the other.

I’d just go ahead and imagine him as one half of Men on Politics.

Democrats? hated it

 
 

I missed Twoofie?

what a shame. not.

 
Dirty Deeds- Too Exciting for Troofus' Pants
 

Any race a Democrat ever won is a fluke. Also, I am strongly in favor of forcing every business to only speak English, even though “radical, radical pro-abort policies” sounds like something that Hungarian guy from the Monty Python sketch would say. Pro-also.

 
 

Lmao @ “full metal wingnut”. You guys are the bestest.

 
 

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