The Sixth International

Brian Faughnan, RedState:

WTO: US Must Drop Protectionism for Trade Deal:
Will Obama Again Choose Unilateralism & the Status Quo?

  • Obama continues to antagonize the world community by favoring domestic interests.

‘Shorter’ concept created by Daniel Davies and perfected by Elton Beard. We are aware of all Internet traditions.™


 

Notes:

1 – Title cf.

2 – Clip-‘n’-save value: 9.5! When next someone says to you, “Whoah-whoah-whoah, hold on just one second there: The conservative intelligentsia does not abandon patriotism whenever it gets in the way of something that rich people want,” then you will have them.

 

Comments: 94

 
 
 

One International is not enough, but two Internationals are too many.

 
 

Bonus headline: Obama Must Drop Opposition To Slavery For Trade Deal.

Hey, it makes business more efficient, right? Lowers input costs?

 
 

Wait, so now they care about the opinions and well-being of other countries?

 
 

And he is doing this at the same time as selling out US interests for European approval. Truly, a man of many talents.

 
Xecklothxayyquou Gilchrist
 

Wait, so now they care about the opinions and well-being of other countries?

Yeah! I thought that was craven, Chamberlainy appeasery appeasing, having to ask permission to do what we want and all.

 
 

Just like Obamahitlerstalinmessiahhopey, caring about his own country first! HOW DARE HE

 
Rusty Shackleford
 

Dude, I like totally partied with that dude

 
a concerned citizen
 

Yeah, shouldn’t that guy be shotgunning a Coors Light in the parking lot of a JV lacrosse game right now?

I like how we’re supposed to be all sensitive to what a bunch of damn furriners think of us.

 
 

Do not taunt happy fun Mrs Tilton.

 
 

starting trade wars with Canada and Mexico

Nobody up here is calling it a war yet, but we’re quite used to the US congress arbitrarily jamming up our trade access, including canceling negotiated contracts. Dems and Repubs have been doing this since long before Obama showed up, usually with the full-throated approval of wingnuttia.

Of course, turning your beliefs on a dime when the president is black a Democrat is pure hypocrisy a cardinal virtue.

 
 

Say what you will about Brian Faughnan’s inane blatherings. The fact remains, he’s got purty lips.

 
 

From evicting the bust of Winston Churchill from the Oval Office, to sacrificing East European allies for better relations with Russia and Iran, to starting trade wars with Canada and Mexico…

How can he not include Obama’s single most heinous and antagonizing thing EVER? He really pissed off THE QUEEN.

 
Shecky McTeabagg
 

I’ve also “evicted the bust of Winston Churchill”. I said “Your manboobs have missed the rent once too often, Winnie. Get them the hell outta here!”

 
 

evicting the bust of Winston Churchill from the Oval Office

I think the Americans with Disabilities Act prohibits evicting the torsoless.

 
Shecky McTeabagg
 

Those red state agri-families will appreciate the reduction of tariff barriers.

 
 

There’s a bust of Winston Churchill in the corner
And the Bible lies unopened on the floor

 
 

“Would you like another helping of stupid?”

“Oh, I couldn’t have another, really. I’m stuffed!”

“Come on, just a little one? This one is even more stupid than the last one.”

“Well, I…”

“And it’s specially flavored with Breitbart and Beck! You can’t get this much stupid in one place anywhere else!”

“Oh, all right.” (Takes a bite.) Wow! That really is stupid!

 
 

You know, when Obama said he would repair relationships with other countries, I think he was talking about closing illegal torture camps and bombing fewer civilians. Flying more peaches in from South America might be pretty far down the list.

 
 

In the spirit of looney leftism I think we should give this young gay man a hearing. He’s clearly striving to be a part of the American mainstream, perhaps even denying his homosexuality and trying to date girls, however icky he finds that stuff. We would be hypocritical not to listen to his seasoned views about international relations and foreign policy and hair product.

 
 

Flying more peaches in from South America might be pretty far down the list.

Typical liberal terror-fasci-islamist.

Jesus commands us to torture, and bomb, and execute criminals. Also, tax cuts, also.

Also, Republican Jesus hates charity, because Mary Magdalene Ayn Rand.

 
 

Hey Gavin, thanx for the clip-n-save ranking thing! It’ll help me organize my burgeoning Snappy Responses to Stupid Wingnuts™ file that I seem to wield with increasing frequency these days.

 
Big Bad Bald Bastard
 

He must be Cthulhu Faughnan’s brother.

 
 

Will Obama Again Choose Unilateralism & the Status Quo?

Redstate complaining about unilateralism? Wow.

Just… wow.

.

 
 

Yeah, so Hopey just gave a speech when I set off a nuke.

I wonder what will happen if I drop one on South Korea or an American military base in Asia? Anyone?

 
The Very Reverend Battleaxe of Knowledge
 

You know, as veteran of the Battle of Seattle, anything that pisses off the WTO is an objective good. And that fiasco did cause us to fire that bloodthirsty cossack Norm Stamper and hire Gil Kerlikowske, so you can thank us for that.

But what’s funny is, a week later Nelson Mandela was in town, to universal acclaim. The WTO one week, Nelson Mandela the next. If the WTO (well, their predecessor) had already arranged everything the way they wanted, the sanctions that brought down apartheid wouldn’t have been possible, and Mandela would have still been on Robben Island. Seattle, delivering cognitive dissonance since 1851!

But now, the righties have their knickers in a twist over Obama “choosing unilateralism?” They may just have us beat!

 
The Very Reverend Battleaxe of Knowledge
 

Kim, if this one was only 10 times the yield of the first one, that’s still what is known as a “dud.” So STFU, already.

 
 

So I *could* drop my nuke on Seoul and all I would get is a strongly worded speech?

 
The Very Reverend Battleaxe of Knowledge
 

Oh, and it’s Kim Jong-Il. Moran!

 
The Very Reverend Battleaxe of Knowledge
 

People don’t drop munitions which fail to work properly anyplace, idiot. Anything less than 20 kilotons is a dud. Come back when you’ve got one. Until then STFU.

 
The Very Reverend Battleaxe of Knowledge
 

In fact, Kim, here’s the design. This has been our sole design for 50 years. Come back when you can make it work.

 
The Very Reverend Battleaxe of Knowledge
 
 

Teh Rev, facts to the witless boring troll are like water to a duck.

Except ducks aren’t evil, boring cobags, of course.

 
Big Bad Bald Bastard
 

Except ducks aren’t evil, boring cobags, of course.

I hate to burst your bubble, but…

http://pandasthumb.org/archives/2007/05/twisty-maze-of.html

 
The Very Reverend Battleaxe of Knowledge
 

I know, ITTDGY, but the stupidity of the notion that you can keep 65-year-old technology so secret that nobody else can develop it unless “we’re” so “weak” as to allow it never ceases to amaze me.

 
Galt's Gulch Water Board
 

Teh trolls are so ronery.

 
 

The funny thing is, he’s right, but for two wrong reasons. The farm subsidies enacted by Bush and the Republicans earlier in this decade are disastrous for the developing world, as farmers in other countries cannot compete fairly for the American market. (Said subsidies, of course, were political support and payoffs for red-state interests.)

By whining about Obama’s “unilateralism”, he gives the game away. His main ‘reason’ is that Obama’s not a Republican.

 
 

Hey Rev. What if I got a 10 MT weapon and dropped it on an Imperialist American military base? What would Hopey do, really?

 
 

Next up on the History Channel, The Link!

Bwahahahaha!

After, When Wingnut Heads Explode.

I needed the laugh. My 13 year old cat died this weekend.

The Link thing is supposed to look like a cat. So we got the opposable thumbs, and they got attention to hygiene.

Hmmmm.

 
 

I hardly consider it an unconscienable affront to fair play if we have some protective barriers in place that prevent, say, Kroger, from importing friggin’ green beans from China and selling them cheaper, because there’s no fucking way you can grow a green bean in China and ship it way the fuck over here without incurring a bunch of hidden, subsidized costs. Such as burning a bunch of fossil fuel to move something halfway around the friggin’ world that you can grow in your own backyard. And really, I’m not keen on eating vegetables grown in fields fertilized with raw human sewage anyway, no matter how much less they cost.

But aside from that, there’s really only one reason why we have agriculture protectionism, and it’s got jack-shit to do with your friendly family farmer, whom the US government has been doing its level best to put out of business for quite some time now, and everything to do with helping out Cargill, ADM, Monsanto, and a handful of other corporate interests. And I’d like to see them all go straight to hell.

So you see, I find this a bit of a dilemma.

 
The Very Reverend Battleaxe of Knowledge
 

Kim: Do you have any conception of what the word “megaton” means? What’s involved in building a two-stage device like that? Especially when you can’t even get the primary to work? And how much such a weapon weighs? You have no earthly conception of any of the crap you’re talking about. Read that article I linked to, and get back to us when you have a primary that halfway works.

 
 

And really, I’m not keen on eating vegetables grown in fields fertilized with raw human sewage anyway, no matter how much less they cost.

Elitist!

Actually, this shipping stuff from halfway around the world and selling it for a penny has a short shelf life at this point.

 
 

Just saying, Rev., what if I COULD make such a device and used it on Americans? What do you think Chocolate Jesus would do?

 
Galt's Gulch Water Board
 

Hey, “Kim”, your little pretend toy nuke didn’t work right…again.

http://www.armscontrolwonk.com/

But no matter, the only people who it will reliably terrorize are American right-wing morans, who can always be relied on to go apeshit with fear when some third-world dipshit tries out a half-assed pretend weapon that would never work in the real world.

Keep up the great work! It’s 100% effective in terrorizing US conservatives!

 
 

What if Kim Jong Il teamed up with Hamas, Mahmoud Ahmedinejad, and Robo-Stalin 5000 to create a bomb that destroyed all the underwear in America? Then we’d have to buy underwear directly from the North Koreans!!

 
The Very Reverend Battleaxe of Knowledge
 

Kim Jong Il: If you dropped your pathetic failed single-stage nuke on anybody, you would be destroyed. You know that. Only whiny-ass tittie-babies think that things like this work in a vacuum. That anybody would use their ONE nuke on American interests and not know they were calling the wrath of god down on themselves–real people aren’t as divorced from reality as you neocon dipshits.

This whole WATB-ishness dates back to the Cuban Missile Crisis. We expect the Russians to acquiesce in our putting Jupiters in Turkey, actually on their border, and then whine like little bitches when they put similar missiles in Cuba. Fuck, sack up and grow a pair, you whining fucktards!

 
 

Kim,
If a frog had wings it wouldn’t womp it ass every time it landed.

 
 

What if Kim Jong Il teamed up with Hamas, Mahmoud Ahmedinejad, and Robo-Stalin 5000

I think you’re giving Robo-Stalin 5000’s hygiene too much credit.

 
 

Obviously Obama should do what Bush did: call Kim an imaginary line of evil in a sternly worded speech and then give him a bunch of food and medicine.

 
 

I can’t see many Sadlynaughts joining the Republican party simply because an irritating troll wanted them to predict how Obama would respond to a bad science-fiction scenario.

 
 

It should be noted that Kim Jong Il can completely flatten Seoul, the largest city in South Korea, and the U.S. military bases would be toast, with nothing more than conventional weaponry — mainly sh*t-loads of artillery. Any time he wants. The North has been able to do this for several generations. And it hasn’t happened.

 
 

Just saying, Rev., what if I COULD make such a device and used it on Americans? What do you think Chocolate Jesus would do?

Probably what any other American president would do. Respond with force.

But you’re actually asking the wrong question, because you’re a douchebag. The question isn’t what would a national leader do after another country bombed it. The question is how does a national leader prevent another country from bombing it in the first place.

It’s a three-parter. You have to prevent them from acquiring the means, and from giving them a motivation to use them, and letting them think they can succeed if they do it.

George Bush’s score on the first two counts is ZERO. He didn’t prevent them from acquiring the means, and he sure as hell gave them reason to want them. Obama hasn’t had enough time in office to affect either.

As far as the third – Obama’s got the same thing backing him up that Bush had – despite Bush’s compromising our military strength by fucking up two wars.

Kim Jong Il dropping a bomb on Americans is like the guy stranded on the ledge of a tall building. Whatever makes him finally jump isn’t based on what other people do – it’s from internal forces.

Obama and Hillary might do a better job of talking him off the ledge. Bush was standing on the ground going “Go ahead and jump, mutherfucker!”

 
The Very Reverend Battleaxe of Knowledge
 

And of course, if that idiot Bush had stuck with the Agreed Framework, none of this crap would have happened. But of course, he couldn’t do that, because it was negotiated by TEH CLENIS!!!!

It’s a goddamn wonder he didn’t nuke Northern Ireland on the same theory.

 
 

I could be wrong here, but I’m about 99% positive Obama asked to end said agriculture subsidies in his proposed budget. Congress laughed heartily at this and will continue with the status quo, Obama is not going to have his budgetary priorities die on this hill (of corn).

 
 

Smut Clyde said,

May 26, 2009 at 3:31

I can’t see many Sadlynaughts joining the Republican party simply because an irritating troll wanted them to predict how Obama would respond to a bad science-fiction scenario.

You have no hope!

P.S. You don’t mean to suggest the boring attention trool has another goal besides world domination, do you?

 
Mahmoud Ahmadenijad
 

I’m about to win re-election because my people sense American weakness due to their new “leader”. I will win easily.

 
Kim Jong Ahmadenijhamastalin 5000
 

Poopy fart pants in the buttnutts, libs. Hmmm??

 
 

Kim Jong Il.

Bonus points: that dumbass Hannity used this clip to criticize Obama for not “getting tough” on NK by, I dunno, nuking them or something…completely missing that the point of the entire friggin’ movie is that we fuck things up on a pretty regular basis when we decide to go “tough”.

 
 

In the early days of the Bush administration, post 9/11, I had a Republican friend say to me, “I’m so glad Al Gore wasn’t in office on 9/11.”

Oh really?

Well, what did Bush do that Al Gore wouldn’t have done? I’m sure the military response would have been the same. And because he wouldn’t have had a deep personal need to attack Saddam, he might have concentrated on Afghanistan and actually caught Osama bin Laden.

But mainly, if Gore had been President, he probably would have paid more attention to Richard Clarke BEFORE 9/11. And while it may not have been possible to stop the plot, I doubt he would have sat in a classroom reading “My Pet Goat” for 12 minutes while his country was under attack.

And while we’re speculating what things might happen in alternate universes, what do you suppose John McCain’s approach to Kim Jong Il might have been during the first five months of his presidency, and how might it have affected the outcome differently?

 
 

I’m about to win re-election because my people sense American weakness due to their new “leader”. I will win easily.

Bookmark it, libs.

 
 

I’m about to win re-election because my people sense American weakness due to their new “leader”

Did I somehow miss the part where George W. Bush man-of-steel kept you from getting elected the first time around?

 
Mahmoud Ahmadenijad said,
 

I won pretty easily the last time too, when there was a real tough guy in the White House:

“Ahmadinejad became the sixth president of Iran on 6 August 2005, after winning 62 percent of the vote in the run-off poll, nearly twice that of Akbar Hashemi Rafsanjani.”

 
 

Hey, maybe Bush should have given Ahmadinejad some food and medicine, too. That sure would have showed him!

 
Xecklothxayyquou Gilchrist
 

Mahmoud Ahmadenijad said,

I can’t spell my name!

 
Galt's Gulch Water Board
 

Thank God Bush kept 9/11 from happening! Strong deciders are the BEST!

 
Xecklothxayyquou Gilchrist
 

Did I somehow miss the part where George W. Bush man-of-steel kept you from getting elected the first time around?

No, you missed the part where Dumbya was edited out of history entirely by embarrassed wingtards.

 
Mahmoud Ahmadenijad said,
 

If there’s one thing that the aggressive tactics and strong arm approach of the Bush administration accomplished, it was prevention of the election of any radical anti-American politicians in the Middle east. His strength scared the Palestinians so much that they elected the moderate pro American Hamas ticket.

 
The Very Reverend Battleaxe of Knowledge
 

Xecklothxayyquou Gilchrist said,
May 26, 2009 at 4:00

Mahmoud Ahmadenijad said,

I can’t spell my name!

He can’t spell Kim Jong-Il either.

 
 

Thank God Bush kept 9/11 from happening! Strong deciders are the BEST!

I’ve never been able to wrap my head around the apparently successful transparent bullshittery of “we kept you safe after 9/11.” Which of course doesn’t count the anthrax stuff, but never mind. For years, the message they’ve been delivering with a straight face is: “we kept you safe after that one time that we let the biggest attack on civilians get past us” thing. It’s like history began on 9/11. “Oh, well, yeah, if you forget about that one time, it was a perfect record.”

 
The Very Reverend Battleaxe of Knowledge
 

@ Jennifer: It’s like there were statues of Husband E. Kimmel everywhere and nobody had ever heard of Chester Nimitz.

 
 

Yeah, it is like that. But I had to google it, damn you!

 
 

George W. Bush man buns-of-steel

Fiqqst

 
 

“we kept you safe after 9/11.”

In the Air Force we used to say:

One “Oh Shit!” cancels a hundred “Attaboys!”

 
 

Hey, look, our swift actions prevented us from drunk driving into a minivan full of kids and killing all on board a second time, if you don’t mind spotting us that one time where we did do that.

 
 

Beck: Wait a minute. Are you suggesting that Barack Obama walks into a room and goes, “GE CEOs, look under your seat!”

Breitbart: I think that’s exactly what it is.

Beck: You’ve got a bailout. Is that what you’re suggesting?

Breitbart: That’s exactly what I’m suggesting. It is the Oprah Winfrey presidency.

Wow. Um.

I mean, he was talking to Glenn Blecch and all, but JAY-ZEUSSS that’s some prime wingnut on the hoof there.

 
 

In the early days of the Bush administration, post 9/11, I had a Republican friend say to me, “I’m so glad Al Gore wasn’t in office on 9/11.”

The very day it happened, though, people were shaking their heads. I was in Calgary overhearing rightwing oilpatch execs going on and on about Bush hiding out, acting flummoxed, screwing up his statement. Nobody believed in the guy that day.

Yet they (Rove?) managed a 180-degree rep rehab in less than a week. A PR masterstroke for the ages.

 
 

He can’t spell Kim Jong-Il either.

Fun fact: Sen. Jesse Helms used to call the man “Kim Jong Two”, ’cause that’s what happens when all that fine Carolina barbeque finally wreaks its vengance on your cerebral arteries.

(N.B. Am saying nothing bad about Carolina BBQ – I have the odd feeling though Jesse was known to walk up and chomp off chunks of roast pig even before it had been taken out of the pit, and that kind of thing’s going to have repercussions on down the road.)

 
 

Yet they (Rove?) managed a 180-degree rep rehab in less than a week. A PR masterstroke for the ages.

Yep. It was the standing-on-the-rubble-with-the-bullhorn thing. That and throwing out the pitch at Yankee Stadium.

 
 

Oh, well, yeah, if you forget about that one time, it was a perfect record.

This sort of thing makes for harmless parlor conversation when the subject is, say, sports. “Hey, take away the month of June, and the Mariners would’ve finished first!”. It’s the sort of rationalizing that one expects from sports fans. “If only Brady had been healthy!”.

When such pretzel logic is applied to matters of life and death, on the other hand, I tend to find it really annoying.

 
 

Hey libs – caress my toast!

 
The Very Reverend Battleaxe of Knowledge
 

Fun fact: Sen. Jesse Helms used to call the man “Kim Jong Two”

All this proves is that sans-serif fonts are a menace to civilization.

 
 

Also, the sheep had no one else to look to for a daddy, because Michael Moore & Al Gore are both fat!!

 
Phoenician in a time of Romans
 

I hardly consider it an unconscienable affront to fair play if we have some protective barriers in place that prevent, say, Kroger, from importing friggin’ green beans from China and selling them cheaper, because there’s no fucking way you can grow a green bean in China and ship it way the fuck over here without incurring a bunch of hidden, subsidized costs. Such as burning a bunch of fossil fuel to move something halfway around the friggin’ world that you can grow in your own backyard. And really, I’m not keen on eating vegetables grown in fields fertilized with raw human sewage anyway, no matter how much less they cost.

Except what’s kicking this off is dairy subsidies. This means paying US taxpayer money to farmers (usually big farmers) so they can sell their stuff cheaper to the rest of the world. They need this because they lack any competitive advantages over other producers (such as those of my country).

A better way to do it would be to give “dairy vouchers” to consumers and let them buy their own milk products from whomever. An even better way would be not to try propping up any industry in which you lack a competitive advantage and have no chance of developing one with a fledgling industry.

It hurts the rest of us, it’s an inefficient waste of your taxpayer money, and the only people it benefits are (big) farmers who cannot compete against the advantages other countries have (including lower wages and standards of living).

There’s a case for some forms of protectionism, but subsidies to exporters, by and large, are a boondoggle resulting from funnelling money to a legislator.

 
Use it as an excuse to start a war with Syria
 

I wonder what will happen if I drop one on South Korea or an American military base in Asia? Anyone?

 
 

Yet they (Rove?) managed a 180-degree rep rehab in less than a week. A PR masterstroke for the ages.
– – – – – – – – –
Yep. It was the standing-on-the-rubble-with-the-bullhorn thing.

Actually, no it wasn’t. 9/11 happened on a Tuesday. The Bushies were so gobsmacked that they made virtually no attempt at all to rally public opinion for about three days. Bush didn’t get off his ass until Friday, when he addressed a high-profile memorial service in Washington and appeared at Ground Zero. But Bush’s approval ratings were already shooting up into the high 80s by Thursday, before he’d really done anything.

The rally-behind-the-leader shit didn’t kick in for a couple days, but it began independently of anything Bush did. At that point, a lot of people would have rallied behind an eggplant.

 
 

At that point, a lot of people would have rallied behind an eggplant.

Which is why the current GOP/Cheney/Newt plan to set Obama up to be taken down if/when a terrorist attack happens on his watch is doomed to fail. It will be the last nail in the Republican coffin.

 
 

a lot of people would have rallied behind an eggplant.

ftfy

 
 

Every time I see Cheney, Rove, Limbaugh etc. on TV my disgust quickly transforms into joy. This rightwing rug is getting smaller and will soon be all fringe.

Cheney/Palin 2012

 
 

Are the wingnuts now in favor of a global test for American laws? I wonder what John Kerry thinks of that.

 
 

For fuck’s sake, trolls. Here is a handy hint to enable yourselves to look ever-so-slightly less stupid:

1: Go to the website known as ‘Google’. (I really would’ve assumed that people who spend as much time on the internet as you would have heard of it, but the facts in evidence repeatedly suggest otherwise.)

2: Type whatever your child-like, ignorant brains imagine is the correct spelling of whichever Islamocommiehomofascist boogieman you wish to parody in the search box.

3: Look at the ‘Did you mean’ suggestion at the top. It will have the correct spelling.

4: Copy and paste that spelling into the name box on S,N.

5: Post usual idiotic bullshit, but this time at least with the correct spelling of the person whom you claim to know enough about to satirize.

6: ???

7: Slightly mitigated FAIL.

 
Sotomayor--Too Liberal for SCOTUS
 

So now Obama has shown his true colors by nominating a far-left, activist, secularist, anti-white, pro-abort judge.

The Conservative movement has been emboldened this morning. Its going to be a long, hard confirmation fight. Get ready, Socialists!

 
 

#

Mahmoud Ahmadenijad said,

May 26, 2009 at 3:42

I’m about to win re-election because my people sense American weakness due to their new “leader”. I will win easily.

Try “I’m about to win re-election because the anti-US sentiment & convenient removal of my #1 rival for the title generated by BushCo’s plan-free Magical Mesopotamia Fuckup Tour made my country into the political Alpha Dog of the region – & because despite a lot of nauseating sabre-rattling a few years back, the US hasn’t attacked me yet.”

Who gets to be the next float in this parade of fail? “Hugo Chavezz”? “Rachelle Ray”? “Malcolm Ex”?

 
Sotomayor-Too brown for SCOTUS
 

Bring it on.

 
 

Zarquon @0:13,

that’s sweet of you, really. But I haven’t actively blogged in a long time, so I suppose Gavin will become entitled to my domain in about 40 years or so, under the doctrine of adverse possession, or something.

Mind you, I still maintain the domain, and if I ever have some really ass-kicking pictures of spiders or what have you, I’ll be sure to post them for your delectation.

And if Gavin ever again presumes to use my feckin site name, I’ll sue his ass so hard that even Amy Alkon will be beg me not to hurt him.

 
Gozar the Gozarian
 

Hey libs, what will your Hopey McChange do when I appear in the form of a giant Slore? Many shubs and zuuls and libs will know what it is to be roasted in the depths of the Slore that day, I can tell you.

 
 

(comments are closed)