Ah, four wheel drive Jeeps…for when you absolutely, positively need that extra power for the three degree incline out of the mall parking lot…

HTML,

Linky. Fixy?

Both his head and his suit are too big for his body.

Are these signals like the restroom toe-tap thing, or what?

The driver had his left hand in the 12 o’clock position (I assume his right hand was, like mine, on the stick),

…answered my own question.

Wranglers are very popular with gay men. Just sayin’.

for when you absolutely, positively need that extra power for the three degree incline out of the mall parking lot…

Hey! He might have been carrying HEAVY CARGO, y’know.

That suit, for example.

That “wave” thing…is that a cry for help, or what?

“Hey, I see you too pay way too much for gas for a vehicle you don’t need, since all you’re doing is running down to Starbucks for coffee and the newspaper! You could do that on a bicycle, but you’re too cool to be seen nekkid! You have to have tons of throbbing metal encasing you like a condom for your psyche.”

That suit, for example.

I dunno, Pere. Looks like worsted wool to me…

ohgeez, prepare for wingnut outrage. Malcom X is the featured article on Teh Wikipedia today.

Looks like worsted wool to me…

It was probably the worst wool they could find, indeed.

Patrick Bateman: Do you like Phil Collins? I’ve been a big Genesis fan ever since the release of their 1980 album, Duke. Before that, I really didn’t understand any of their work. Too artsy, too intellectual. It was on Duke where Phil Collins’ presence became more apparent. I think Invisible Touch was the group’s undisputed masterpiece. It’s an epic meditation on intangibility. At the same time, it deepens and enriches the meaning of the preceding three albums. Christy, take off your robe. Listen to the brilliant ensemble playing of Banks, Collins and Rutherford. You can practically hear every nuance of every instrument. Sabrina, remove your dress. In terms of lyrical craftsmanship, the sheer songwriting, this album hits a new peak of professionalism. Sabrina, why don’t you, uh, dance a little. Take the lyrics to Land of Confusion. In this song, Phil Collins addresses the problems of abusive political authority. In Too Deep is the most moving pop song of the 1980s, about monogamy and commitment. The song is extremely uplifting. Their lyrics are as positive and affirmative as anything I’ve heard in rock. Christy, get down on your knees so Sabrina can see your asshole. Phil Collins’ solo career seems to be more commercial and therefore more satisfying, in a narrower way. Especially songs like In the Air Tonight and Against All Odds. Sabrina, don’t just stare at it, eat it. But I also think Phil Collins works best within the confines of the group, than as a solo artist, and I stress the word artist. This is Sussudio, a great, great song, a personal favorite.

Not to pile on or anything, but 1987 called. It wants its suit back. Please dry clean it first. hanx!

Gee, my comment over there thanking Stephen for explaining how closeted gay men signal to other closeted gay men didn’t make it past moderation.

Imagine my surprise.

With a thrill in my head
and a pill on my tongue
dissolve the nerves that have just begun
Listenin’ to Marvin – all night long!

This is OT and a shameless blogwhore to boot but I thought you’d be interested in seeing this lawsuit filed buy TCOT founder and “tea party activist” Michael Patrick Leahy, who is pissed that a blogger found out that he may have been protesting taxes that he himself doesn’t pay.

Oh, the humanity.

Boy, the GOP is just a festival of “do as I say, not as I don’t do” these days.

Unfortunately, that was probably the least mock-worthy post that Green has made over the years. Is it really such slim-pickin’s for wingnut drivel today?

Also, Leahy is pissed that the blogger called him an “insane clown” and a “member of some alien race of Lizard People”.

Some people are SO sensitive.

Some people are SO sensitive.

I know – I’d think that was pretty funny if it were aimed at me.

Debonair lullabies in melodies revealed
In deep despair on lonely nights
He knows just how you feel
The slyest rhymes – the sharpest suits
In miracles made real
Like a bird in flight on a hot sweet night

Also, Leahy is pissed that the blogger called him an “insane clown” and a “member of some alien race of Lizard People”.

Yes WELL, ha-hrm, wonder if she used resources AT HER JOB (*firing firing*) to research that as well, guffaw! blurp blurp *rattles papers*

Like a bird in flight on a hot sweet night

When Wingnut sings
I hear violence

Canyonero-o-o-o-o-o-o! Hee-yah!. [SOUND of bullwhip cracking.]

there’s nothing that quite says back-country rugged manliness like a double-breasted pinstriped suit.

there’s nothing that quite says back-country rugged manliness like a double-breasted pinstriped suit.

But he has a matching tie and handkerchief! How butch is that????

That photo was snapped at an awkward moment. The glass in his hand prevented him from, for God’s sake and at all costs, making a steeple with his hands (a gesture of power and control) the moment he sensed a camera lens on his flesh. It looks like he was raising his hand to make a one-finger-pointing-do-you-want-to-keep-your-spleen-type-gesture but instead got caught in the effete pose of single hand elevated, palm turned down, fingers slightly splayed. Tragick. He did do an excellent job of keeping the pasty, doughy woman next to him enough out of frame to render her easily cropped.

It looks like he was raising his hand to make a one-finger-pointing-do-you-want-to-keep-your-spleen-type-gesture but instead got caught in the effete pose of single hand elevated, palm turned down, fingers slightly splayed.

Oh.

See, I thought he was placing his hand on the head of the invisible woman giving him a manly blow job.

But he has a matching tie and handkerchief! How butch is that????

They’re mauve. Need I say more?

Nothin’ but a Pencil Neck Geek

I always figure I can rent a truck for the one day out of the year I need to move a piece of furniture. The rest of the time I’d just as soon not put up with one.

For whatever it’s worth, I’ve long thought of carrying around cards to slip under the wipers of four-door Wranglers saying “You suck. You’re pissing on the legacy of the Jeep.” But whatever, kind of not worth the bother.

That said, I should start a “Camry wave”. The message: “Fuck them. We like practical.” Too bad it would make more sense for a Prius, which I want but cannot afford.

I thought they were aubergine! Boy, is my face vermilion!

Green totally misses the point.

From my experience, it’s not a “auto-make” wave, it’s a neighborhood wave. It’s a phenomenon of rural areas, two-lane roads, and small communities. drivers tend to recognize other drivers they encounter, just by virtue of the fact that they’re habitual travelers there.

It’s not about the car-type. It’s about “I’ve seen you on this road before, even if I might not know your name.”

Trust me, I live in this kind of neighborhood, and I get “the wave” with my Volkswagen Passat wagon.

the car type only comes into it because rural residents often tend to have vehicles for similar purposes, like pick-ups or jeeps or SUVs – that they really use.

The whole idea of a ‘Wrangler wave” completely misses the point.

Too bad it would make more sense for a Prius, which I want but cannot afford.

There was sort of a Prius Wave early on, before they got all common. I was an early adopter because I was, back then, pre-laid-off from a pretty lucrative job; these days I would go for something cheaper. Though now I get super-duper hippie greenie points for being lucky enough to work within walking distance of home, but there’s no wave for that.

Holy crap, Southern Beale, that guy is a prize-winning asshole. Somebody searches Nexis and finds out he’s a a tax cheat, he SUES and publishes personal data about her, including her place of employment? If she or her boss get ONE even vaguely disturbing contact out of that, which is no doubt his purpose in publishing her employment information, she should make sure the authorities know all about it.

Nothin’ but a Pencil Neck Geek

I have that album.

There is a wave for motorcyclists. More of a “glad to see you’ve also managed to dodge the four wheel morons for another day. Ride on, brother/sister”

Hey there!

More of a “glad to see you’ve also managed to dodge the four wheel morons for another day. Ride on, brother/sister”

Likewise with bicyclists. I don’t know the motorcycling scene all that well – are car drivers openly hostile, sideswipey, and swervy-toward with motorcyclists too, or is it just their cluelessness that’s dangerous?

Also, if you put your McCain-Palin bumpersticker on the left side of the bumper that means you’re a top; if on the right, you’re a bottom. I’m bettin’ Stephen’s sticker is on the right.

What’s more if your yellow ribbon sticker is on the left it means you’re a shrimper and if it’s on the right, you’re a felcher. I’m guessing Stephen has TWO yellow ribbon stickers, one on each side.

Dick Wrangler, more like it.

My fantasy has turned to madness
All my goodness has turned to badness

Both his head and his suit are too big for his body.

He has the physiognomy of a water tower.

I cannot read his piece without thinking back to America’s Coot:

Jeans come prewashed and acid-treated to make them look like what they are not — authentic work clothes for horny-handed sons of toil and the soil. Denim on the bourgeoisie is, Akst says, the wardrobe equivalent of driving a Hummer to a Whole Foods store — discordant.

It would be funny if they started sniping at each other. Also, George Will, being inordinately fond of watching grown men play a children’s game, should STFU about the embrace of “childish things”.

Cracks me up that the discussion adds BMWs Alpha Romeos and VW buses to the mix.

actor212: You may be right, w/r/t the invisible blowjob from the imaginary Hunter College girl. That look on his face does seem to say “Take out your fuckin’ retainer and put it in your handbag.”

I just like to imagine Green is always about to launch into Baldwin’s “I flew here in a helicopter made of platinum and diamonds and baby seal blubber, that’s my name, asshole” monologue.

That’s funny, I have a special wave I give Hummer drivers. It starts with the middle finger of my right hand, followed by the slapping of my right hand into the crook of my left elbow, and an abrupt upward thrust of my left fist. Sadly, sometimes there is only time for the first part of the wave.

On The Patty Winters Show this morning a Cheerio sat in a very small chair and was interviewed for close to an hour.

He has the physiognomy of a water tower.
He misunderstood why people kept comparing him to Lurch the Butler, that’s why he’s posing with someone’s hand propping him up.
I’m more of the Cousin It look, myself.

Candy said,

That’s funny, I have a special wave I give Hummer drivers.

You and many, many others.

Jeep owners waving? Pathetic. Acknowledging fellow road users who have a vehicle similar to your own is usually reserved for things which are a little bit rare, or a little bit hairy arsed.

Bikers have their greeting rituals of course. It’s a kind of nod here in the UK, coz you don’t want to have to take your hand off the throttle. Drivers of classic cars always wave. The closest thing to a wrangler that is wave-worthy would be landrover defenders and series landys.

@ Brian X: It isn’t just the 4 door jeeps that are pissing on the jeep legacy. It is any jeep that has doors at all. Or a roof. Pussies.

Want a manly offroader that doesn’t make you look like an upper middle class pretender or a complete redneck? Series landrover with all the standard features, such as complete lack of carpet, barely functional heater, heaviest clutch in the world, 1930s vintage gearbox with no syncro on first or second, and genuine practicality as an offroader, farm vehicle, or builders van.

“It’s a kind of nod here in the UK, coz you don’t want to have to take your hand off the throttle. ”

That’s what you get for travelling on the wrong side of the road, you wankers!

But anyway, I went riding for a few days in Australia once, and I seem to remember getting quite a few left-hand waves.

He ain’t no fag. Matching tie and pocket square is so goddamn hetero. And awful.

What do you mean “wrong” side of the road, you filthy foreigner! It works far better for right handed car drivers, as the right hand stays on the wheel as you change gear. Especially important for right handed lorry drivers. It makes little difference to bikers, since it isn’t good practice to take either hand off the grips unnecessarily. On the plus side though, you can take your time about finding neutral if you stop at a toll booth, drive through, or similar.

As an aside, I must say I have seen damned little solidarity between cyclists. The kind that wear helmets never acknowledge. The ones in lycra are even worse. That and their red light jumping make them the H2 drivers of cycling.

As an aside, I must say I have seen damned little solidarity between cyclists. The kind that wear helmets never acknowledge. The ones in lycra are even worse.

I call them “butterfly men”. It hit me, while cycling on a local highway that is closed to motor vehicles on Sundays in May, June, and September. One of these guys was tearing ass down a hill (even though a lot of families are around, and little kids are not known to “stay in their lane”). Well, this dude must’ve needed to hit the brakes hard, and he didn’t quite succeed in stopping. Needless to say, he looked like a butterfly that had hit a windshield. Luckily, an ambulance came for him within a few minutes.

The kind that wear helmets never acknowledge.

Also, I wear a helmet. Everyone really should (yeah, I’m a librulfascist freedom hater). About every two years, I take a spill. I always keep a bottle of isopropyl alcohol in my work area.

I take a spill. I always keep a bottle of isopropyl alcohol in my work area.
Effect, meet cause.

I was tickled when driving in France to see that the bikers there wave with their foot.

I even got a foot-wave approaching Paris in a crappy little rental econobox for letting a bike into my lane although as I recall they all lane-split anyway. Can’t recall why the biker needed to actually get into a lane.

I don’t buy into the crap about bicycle helmets. As a motorcyclist, I know what effective head protection looks like. On the bicycle, I just slow down instead.

The “butterfly men” never see what is in front of them either, because they have their heads down. It seems to be fairly true that the less cycling paraphernalia a cyclist has, the more cautious and aware they are.

Then again, I am an apostate in the cycling world, for insisting on handlebars higher than the saddle.

“The kind that wear helmets never acknowledge.”

Likewise with motorcyclists. Last year in Colorado (which has no helmet law and is thus known among fanatical helmet-haters as a “free state,” which is so pathetically offensive considering the history of slavery that I can barely stand to think of it, but anyway, I digress) I rode a few miles without my helmet on, just to see what all the fuss is about. And most every helmetless rider waved to me. Then, when I put my helmet back on, the Darwin-bait crowd returned to their no-wave policy.

oops. I mean that helmet*less* riders rarely acknowledge, which I now realize is absolutely nothing like the situation you describe with cyclists.

never mind.

I’m definitely anti-helmet with bicycles, but for motorcycles, very pro-helmet. The faster you go, the degree of injury you risk goes up exponentially. Besides, a full face lid is just more comfortable at anything over 20mph. Never understood what is so great about windchill. In the UK, we have motorbike helmet laws, but none the less, get posers on vespas and cruisers etc who insist on wearing a pudding basin instead of a proper helmet. Funny how you see them trying to massage some life back into their frozen nose on a summers day..

I’ve heard of the odd “waving with the foot” thing, but cant say it sounds like a good thing for your balance. The most amusing practice I have seen is amongst some sports bike riders, who “wave” to you by lifting the front wheel.

Pretty much all bikers wave though, except plastic scooter riders, and hog riders who only wave at other hogs.

amongst some sports bike riders, who “wave” to you by lifting the front wheel.
You try that on a penny-farthing.

You try that on a penny-farthing.

Ewww.

“posers on vespas and cruisers etc who insist on wearing a pudding basin instead of a proper helmet”

Same here in California. I was on a 620-mile ride this past weekend and lost count of the numbers of Harley©-Davidson™® riders who were identically clad in yarmulke helmets (with obligatory “HELMET LAWS SUCK” stickers), fingerless gloves, and T-shirts. And third-degree sunburns. Granted, it was 104F, but that’s no excuse not to wear proper riding gear.

As the owner of an older corvette we do the “the wave” thing as well.

But that’s a much smaller community with older owners. I can’t imagine every wrangler owner waving. I’m guess there’s lot’s of unreturned waves with this guy.

MINI drivers are also known to wave although there is much less waving now that they are frigging everywhere. I get a wave from one MINI in ten.

It was the same for me with the Miata, I came to the car too late (because I’m cheap) to be one of the waving early adopters.

Thankfully, I don’t tie my self-worth to who acknowledges me as we zip by each other.

Well, drivers of real Minis wave at each other. Drivers of overweight and ugly german imitations thereof, don’t seem to. They often get the “H2 salute” from people driving real ones though.

It is really pointless to wave at someone driving something similar unless you are driving something usually only owned by enthusiasts, rather than just another car.

I am one of those lycra wearing road bikers on a featherweight racing bike. I wave to most anything on two wheels, but a fair amount of my brethren and sistren don’t. I blame it on anything from a ‘harder core than thou’ attitude to the tunnel vision that shows up accompanying advanced fatigue and exhaustion.

Tie matches pocket square matches plonk in glass. Very handy, in case he happens to spill some of the plonk on his tie and has to mop it up with his pocket hankie. Which of course he will, if he talks with those long sloppy hands like I think he does.

“overweight and ugly german imitations”

Me-yowch!

My Mini weighs very nearly the same as my ’92 Miata did, around 2300 lbs. It also has 50+ more HP. The new model mini is a very competent vehicle. I autocross and I can tell you they’re quick and nimble.

Ugly? That’s up to you to judge.

After all, I’m one of those lycra wearing bike riders. Recumbent, no less. Clearly I have no taste.

What do you mean “wrong” side of the road, you filthy foreigner! It works far better for right handed car drivers, as the right hand stays on the wheel as you change gear.

People who have any difficulty steering with their left hand while they shift with their right should not be allowed to leave the house.

I don’t buy into the crap about bicycle helmets.

You will if you don’t want a hole drilled in your head with a powerdrill

OneMan: Like I said, overweight. I take it you are an American, and not familiar with the existence of the entire hot hatch market sector. The blob is one of the slower and more understeery cars. Slower around the corners than the 50 year old car it was supposed to replace. To you small car deprived yanks, it might look good. But here it is on the crap side of average, and only bought by people who WANT to be fashionable, but don’t realise they went out of fashion 3 or 4 years ago. You know the type. Women pushing 40 with a fake tan. The new hotness is the fiat 500, which is a lighter and FASTER car.

No, YOU shut up: Why compromise? a RHD car gives you an advantage when driving a fast car. A significant advantage on a race track, and a minor increase to safety on the road.

The only thing sexier than a tight biker ass in lycra is an undamaged brain.

I am one of those lycra wearing road bikers on a featherweight racing bike. I wave to most anything on two wheels, but a fair amount of my brethren and sistren don’t.

Look more carefully next time. Some of us are too terrified to take a hand off the drops…I usually just flick my fingers (all of them so there’s no misinterpretation) to other bikers, as well as to drivers who are courteous and allow me right-of-way at stop signs and such.

“The new hotness is the fiat 500, which is a lighter and FASTER car.”

Maybe with Chrysler being taken over by our new Italian overlords, we’ll get some of that hotness over here.

2300# is light compared to the 3000#+ average, even for “sports” cars. Amurka teh monstrous.

I do apologize but I need to clarify my previous remark.

Anyone who lacks the iron will that I employed to develop perfect ambidexterity at the age of 7 should be confined to a deep hole in a basement, does not know what pain is and should put the fucking lotion in the basket. It’s for their own good.

Well, I certainly can’t compete with the Human Q-tip here in terms of his manly car that only the manliest of manly men drive (#10), so I’ll let him enjoy his faux-macho (fauxcho?) signifiers that distract him from the abyss of anomie and ennui that ever yawns at his feet. Maybe he’ll fall in faster that way.

But he has a matching tie and handkerchief! How butch is that????

Spengler Dampniche has already noted that it’s too butch, since they shouldn’t exactly match. But he could have gotten away with that, and the, er, full cut of the suit, if it weren’t double-breasted. Nope, that’s what puts it over the top. Gosh, it’s so easy to fall into the single entendre trap.

I employed to develop perfect ambidexterity at the age of 7

Does mommy know you spilled her precious bodily fluids?

He has the physiognomy of a water tower.

Now, miss. Look carefully at <A href=http://www.artlex.com/ArtLex/c/Images/cylindr_becher.watert.lg.jpgthis line-up. Do you recognise any of them as your satorial assailant with the aubergine accessories?

It’s hard to tell… I was so drunk, and everything was a blur…

Does mommy know you spilled her precious bodily fluids?

Typical, white person.

Typical, white person.

White, yes, typical, not on your life.

Q.: What do you someone who is very good at collecting deer semen?
A.: Bambidextrous.

I am baffled by the fact that so many of the Google-hits for “deer semen collection” involve NZ websites.

White, yes, typical, not on your life.

Concern troll!

“I am baffled by the fact that so many of the Google-hits for “deer semen collection” involve NZ websites.”

Me too! Now sheep semen collection, on the other hand…er, I mean, oh never mind!

White, yes, typical, not on your life.

Concern troll!

I think you need to put down the mirror.

Now sheep semen collection collectors

Fixed

I think you need to put down the mirror.

GASP! It’s the “I know you are but what am I?” defense. What will he take nearly 24 hours to think up next?