Life Gives Ramesh Lemons; Ramesh Makes Lemon Tidy-Bowl

porta-a-ponnuru

ABOVE: The Port-A-Ponnuru


Hey, Ramesh, look! A steaming pile of dog shit. Let’s see if we can turn it into mousse de foie gras aux truffes, ‘kay?

The Cheney Effect [Ramesh Ponnuru]

Rasmussen finds that Americans disagree 51-38 percent with former vice president Cheney’s contention that Obama has made the country less safe. … This finding will probably add fuel to the debate over whether Cheney’s outspokenness is hurting the GOP.

Well, that’s not just any old dog shit that you’ve got there, Ramesh. You’ve got runny, worm-infested yellow dog shit. It’s certainly going to be hard to turn that into foie gras. But don’t underestimate Ramesh. There’s a reason he’s a senior editor at National Review, and it’s not just those two-hour save-the-innocent-blastocysts prayer-and-rosary sessions he has with K-Lo in the empty cubicle where Chris Buckley used to sit.

But before reaching that conclusion people should consider, first, that the numbers would probably be worse than 51-38 for Republicans if Cheney hadn’t been talking

And just think how much worse Waterworld would have been if Kevin Costner hadn’t been in it. And how many more Chileans would have “disappeared” if Pinochet hadn’t been President of Chile! The best part about being a wingnut is being able to argue your case based on an alternate and completely speculative universe where pretty much anything that might help your argument could have happened.

[A]nd, second, [consider] that national security is still one of the Republican party’s best issues.

And health care is the Democrat’s best issue, but no one is saying that having Cynthia McKinney talking about it on every single news show would be a good thing. At this point, since no one who actually graduated from Princeton could say something so stupefyingly inane, I think we have the right to demand the vault copy of Ramesh’s diploma before he can make any more allusions to his alleged undergraduate degree. And no lame-ass letter from the President of Princeton will cut it either.

Ramesh has had two tries and the steaming pile still doesn’t look very appetizing. Let’s see if the third time is the culinary charm:

More attention to national security, all else equal, helps Republicans, and Cheney is certainly getting attention.

This isn’t just epic fail, this is Cecil Fucking B. DeMille epic fail. If a poll came out saying that 75% of Americans believed that Dick Cheney dined on raw human flesh, Ramesh would be pointing out that this isn’t such a bad thing since, all else equal, 50 percent of American’s believe that low carb diets are effective methods of weight control.

 

Comments: 321

 
 
 

Is he honestly putting forth that this nutcase, Dick Cheney, Mr. Teen Approval Ratings, attracts more support in this poll?????? That if, say, Colin Powell had said the exact same thing, he would have been shunned by 54% of respondents?

That’s some damn fine wingnuttery right there…

 
 

Bookmark this libs. This is how it will go down.

 
Dragon-King Wangchuck
 

Rasmussen!

 
 

The last time I went Ras mussen’ it was quite unfulfilling. And it just pissed off the Ras I mussed.

 
 

You mean Cheney doesn’t dine on raw human flesh?

 
 

You mean Cheney doesn’t dine on raw human flesh?

Well, only the tenderest newborn baby flesh.

 
 

Well, at least he respects life! He doesn’t dine on aborted fetus flesh, he respects the sanctity of human life by allowing the babies to be born before he dines on them.

 
 

This is good news for McCain.

 
 

ftr ll, f t’s nyn wh s dptng th Chny pstn, t’s Hpy McChng.

 
 

Christ, did a cow shit in here?

 
 

He doesn’t dine on aborted fetus flesh

He’ll never get young that way.

(q.v. the Korean film “Dumplings” – not for the skweeemitch)

 
 

I think you’re making a mistake trying to stink up a Tintin thread, Troofie.

Just sayin’.

 
 

At this point, since no one who actually graduated from Princeton could say something so stupefyingly inane, I think we have the right to demand the vault copy of Ramesh’s diploma before he can make any more allusions to his alleged undergraduate degree.

LONG FORM ONLY, WE KNOW HOW EASY THEY ARE TO FORGE. I GET DIPLOMA OFFERS ALL THE TIME IN MY HOTMAIL ACOUNT.

 
 

Tntn cn bn m gn, bt ‘ll b bck.

‘ll typ n whtvr thrd dmn wll pls.

Whtvr hppnd t “Dssnt s th Hghst Frm f Ptrtsm”?

 
 

The Cheney Effect – A powerful force which renders one’s own group weak and inneffective while making one’s enemies virtually omnipotent.

 
Dragon-King Wangchuck
 

Descent is the Highest form of Patriotic!

 
 

Are you there Jah? It’s me, Ras Mussen. Fire pon Babylon.

 
 

gss nw w’ll s f “Tntn” hs th crg f hs cnvctns, r f h s jst pthtc bm cltst wth pstr f Th n vr hs bd.

 
 

Even Obama agrees that Obama is destroying America. Suck it libs!

 
 

Dig Troofie’s crazy Cthulu bumbo klaat sound.

 
Ted the Slacker
 

the numbers would probably be worse than 51-38 for Republicans if Cheney hadn’t been talking

So when Americans are shitting themselves that’s good for Republicans. Glad to have that cleared up.

Yeah, and what is that godawful stink? Tintin, for fuck sake man, your portaponnuru is overflowing or something.

 
 

That picture gives me diarrhea.

 
 

Praise the disemvowler and pass the Pine-Sol, please!

 
 

[consider] that national security is still one of the Republican party’s best issues.

Isn’t that kinda like being the tallest pygmy?

 
 

Christ, Tintin, I was eating when I read that post.

 
 

Disemvowelment is the highest form of patriotism.

 
 

Isn’t it a wonderful day to be a post partisan? Surely wec can accept torture enablers in our party!

What a wonderful day for HOPE and CHANGE!

 
Trilateral Chairman
 

Is he honestly putting forth that this nutcase, Dick Cheney, Mr. Teen Approval Ratings

Heh. I misunderstood this when I first read it and thought you were somehow asserting that Cheney was in the same league as, say, Miley Cyrus and the Jonas Brothers. I probably should have more tea. Anyway….

…attracts more support in this poll?????? That if, say, Colin Powell had said the exact same thing, he would have been shunned by 54% of respondents?

As I read it, he’s making one of two arguments.

(1) Cheney’s defense is better for Republican poll numbers than, say, Powell’s defense would have been;
(2) Cheney’s defense is better than no defense at all.

(1) is just stupid. (2) is at least arguable (actually, I think it’s probably true), though it certainly qualifies as faint praise.

 
 

So if Obama accepts advice from his senior generals, he’s being just like Bush & Cheney.

Who, of course, were notorious for listening to their generals – like, for example, the ones who told them not to go into Iraq.

O-kay then.

 
 

So I’m guessing TinTin is suggesting that Ponoru is a member of the Butthole Slurpers?

 
 

Heh. I misunderstood this when I first read it and thought you were somehow asserting that Cheney was in the same league as, say, Miley Cyrus and the Jonas Brothers.

I figured either meaning was insulting so I left it that way. 😉

 
 

It’s a simple formula at NRO: argue through assertion instead of evidence.

 
 

Yes Pere! You too are becoming a post partisan now!

Just like Pinochet and Cheney had to protect “national security” by covering up torture, so does Obama!

CHAAAAANGE!!!

 
 

I been thinking about last night’s serious thread (how the fuck did THAT happen?) and this one, and today’s news.

So the GØP ask the CIA to discredit Pelosi. CIA complies. Pelosi sez bullshit. Kitty Bond ratchets up the noise admitting that he doesn’t actually know but he’s darn sure that the CIA would NEVER EVER mislead Congress in any way shape or form and it’s awful the way the Dems are making this coordinated attack on the CIA who have kept us safe all this time……

I’d call that a Cheneyish strategy. Rawmess Poo-on-you-roo thinks it’s EXCELLENT NEWS!!!! FOR ..somebody or other.. And he’s right! The Cheney strategy over the last few weeks has done an excellent job of keeping this shit at the top of the news. And the latest Cheneyite tactic, the CIA sorty on Pelosi has got her pushing for …yep, a truth commission!

They has them some fine strategerists over there in whingnuttia.

 
 

(1) is just stupid. (2) is at least arguable (actually, I think it’s probably true), though it certainly qualifies as faint praise.

Well, the way I read the column, he was claiming that by *Cheney* being the point man, more people were agreeing with the premise than if someone without a dog in the fight, like Powell, were to come out and pontificate that maybe we’re less safe.

Which is weird, because that means Ramesh believes that enough people were hornswoggled by the whole “we made you safe from terror” meme of the Bush adminis–

Oh.

 
 

You have to give it up to the trolls; Welsh is a difficult language to master.

 
 

And Ponnuru really ought to learn to spell his name.

 
 

Which is weird, because that means Ramesh believes that enough people were hornswoggled by the whole “we made you safe from terror” meme of the Bush adminis–

Sadly, Yes.

As Mr. Terry, my 8th grade Civics teacher said, “Never underestimate mass ignorance”.

 
Stag Party Palin
 

Peej, I didn’t know Bond was making the “CIA wouldn’t lie to us” argument, but I did see the Boner reading the same fax. Surely this is enough to make the conspiracy-behind-every-shadow wingnut heads asplode, even when their own people say it. If there is *anything* they believe, it is that *everyone* is lying to them.

 
 

Although “the Cheney effect” may be the usefulness of having a Sith being your media guy: Hoping people with agree with him just to make him go away.

I don’t think Cheney ought to have to go too far, myself, say about 7 feet, with a very sudden stop at the end of the trip.

 
 

oh, my, Obama has not cured everything and made the world a perfect place in the last 5 months and is accepting advice from the military which he should never ever do so I have no choice but to give up and abandon mah Leftist beliefs and join the Ayn Rand Ron Paul poo-eaters.

MMMMM. shit good.

 
 

Rasmussen finds that Americans disagree 51-38 percent with former vice president Cheney’s contention that Obama has made the country less safe.

Boy Howdy, after the way they aced the numbers for that last election, who the heck else would you go to for GOP approval-ratings?

After all, any dummy knows that Rasmussen Polls have ***electrolytes*** – they’re what wingnuts crave!

More attention to national security, all else equal, helps Republicans …

… as long as you don’t count that thing with the jets smashing into buildings … oh, or the other thing with the weaponized anthrax in the mail … or the thing with the hurricane … ooooh, & DEFINITELY do NOT count the thing with the climate going totally bugfuck insane due to a certain party’s insatiable predilection for sucking oil-industry schlong.

But all else equal, he’s absolutely right! Sadly, the “All-Else-Equal Fairy” isn’t going to be leaving any magical reality-morphing-dust under the Goopers’ pillows any time soon. So, yeah, they’re still seriously hooped.

 
 

oh, my, Obama has not cured everything and made the world a perfect place in the last 5 months and is accepting advice from the military which he should never ever do so I have no choice but to give up and abandon mah Leftist beliefs and join the Ayn Rand Ron Paul poo-eaters.

If Jesus can raise the dead, why can’t Obama instantly close Guantanamo? Huh? Answer me that!

 
Dragon-King Wangchuck
 

Not only all else equal but the only place other than in the fevered dreams of wingnuts where the GOP has an advantage over anyone not currently screaming “Death to America” on “trust on national security isues” is in Rasmuss…wow that’s one fucked up sentence.

Okay, more to the point – Rasmussen sucks elephant balls.

Fifty-one percent (51%) disagree with Cheney, according to a new Rasmussen Reports national telephone survey.

The partisan divided is predictable: 72% of Republicans agree with Cheney, while 80% of Democrats disagree. Among voters not affiliated with either party, 35% think Cheney is right, but 50% say he’s wrong.

Those numbers look kinda strange. If Dems disagree with Cheney in larger ratios than Repubs agree with him – and the Independants break almost as strongly against the Dick that drips on detainees – how do you get a net 51% disagree? By polling 1 Repub for every Dem, and then 1 Repub for every Ind. Despite the fact that self-identified R’s are getting to be as rare as Troofy vowels.

 
 

There’s a reason he’s a senior editor at National Review, and it’s not just those two-hour save-the-innocent-blastocysts prayer-and-rosary sessions he has with K-Lo in the empty cubicle where Chris Buckley used to sit.

The Corner must be a wonderful place to work. All the candles & incense & icons all over the place. Hope it doesn’t burn down soon.

 
 

“[A]nd, second, [consider] that national security is still one of the Republican party’s best issues.”

So true. No one can get almost 3k killed on a single day quite like the GOP. You go, gurl!

 
 

What’s with the trolls demanding answers to garbled questions? Even three-year-olds can pronounce, “Excuse me, please, I farted.”

 
 

If Rawmess Poopooru had gone to Princeton, he wouldn’t have written all else equal. Totally smart whingers invariably strive to show off their totally awesome smartness so he would have used the totally awesomely esoteric phrase ceteris paribus.

Therefore and ergo, furthermore thusly, Mr. Smartysmart Poopooru clearly and obviously, even transparently and demonstrably did not go to Princeton. Except, mutatis mutandis, to suck some Princeton Seminarian’s cock.

PENIS ???

 
 

Fick dich, WP.

PENIS ΟΕΔ

 
Dragon-King Wangchuck
 

The real answer to the K-Load conundrum. All else equal! Thus, Jonah = Katherine

QED, as such, not to mention, also.

 
 

The True Meaning of Joe the Plumber is that he is better than every journalist.

 
 

Serious question: Regarding our troll, do people other than Wonkette commenters refer to Obama as “Hopey”?

Sirius question: Which part of the dog does the brightest star form?

 
 

The true meaning of not Joe the not plumber is blart.

 
 

Sirius question: Which part of the dog does the brightest star form?

How can you even Asta the question?

 
 

Like Pandora’s box, now the pun can is open.

 
 

But before reaching that conclusion people should consider, first, that the numbers would probably be worse than 51-38 for Republicans if Cheney hadn’t been talking

Don’t eat the brown acid, man.

That picture gives me diarrhea.

Yeah but you didn’t have to post a photo. I mean, Holy Hell, PeeJ.

 
 

do people other than Wonkette commenters refer to Obama as “Hopey”?

All’s I know, every time I see it I can’t help but think of the chick from “Love & Rockets” who wouldn’t make a bad President probably but is nothing like Obama in more ways than one.

 
 

From the “I just starts ’em; I don’t perpetuates ’em, and anyways, what the hell, it’s Friday” file:

Cereal question: The Trix Rabbit or “Cocoa Puffs” Sonny Bird–who wins in a smackdown of crazy?

 
 

Oh who the fuck cares? The Leprechaun is the whackiest EVAH!!!

 
The Whole Truth and Nothing But The Truth
 

Hey Tintin, say hi to your mom for me.

Asswipe.

 
 

[A]nd, second, [consider] that national security is still one of the Republican party’s best issues.

Examples of Republican achievements:

President Cuts US Coast Guard Funding
Wednesday, August 14, 2002
The White House issued a Statement of President Bush indicating that he will refuse to spend a $5 billion package included in the 2002 Supplemental Appropriations Act for Further Recovery from and Response to Terrorist Attacks on the United States. The President is opposed to several of the individual expenditures in the package, including $273 million in supplemental funding for the Coast Guard. That supplemental funding is now rescinded.

————-

Wednesday, August 14, 2002

In recent months, funding for Homeland Security has been undermined several times by the Administration. …Yesterday, President Bush cut the [Transportation Security Administration]’s budget by an additional $480.2 million. Between Director Daniels and the President’s actions, TSA’s funding will be almost 25 percent below the amount Mineta said was needed back in May.
————-

Washington Post Staff Writers
Thursday, February 23, 2006; Page A01
Faced with an unprecedented Republican revolt over national security, the White House disclosed yesterday that President Bush was unaware of a Middle Eastern company’s planned takeover of operations at six U.S. seaports until recent days and promised to brief members of Congress more fully on the pending deal.

————-

February 27, 2006 New York Times
Governors of both parties said…that Bush administration policies were stripping the National Guard of equipment and personnel needed to respond to hurricanes, floods, tornadoes, forest fires and other emergencies.

Gov. Mike Huckabee, R – Arkansas, chairman of the governors association
Tens of thousands of National Guard members have been sent to Iraq, along with much of the equipment needed to deal with natural disasters and terrorist threats in the United States, the governors said here at the winter meeting of the National Governors Association.

Governor [Dirk Kempthorne of Idaho, a Republican,] said the National Guard was bearing “a totally disproportionate share” of proposed cuts in the growth of the Army’s budget over the next five years, even as the Guard’s responsibilities at home were increasing.

Governors of both parties said a Pentagon plan to reorganize the Army National Guard would significantly weaken its ability to save lives and property at home.

 
 

Sirius question: Which part of the dog does the brightest star form?

Wait, wait, don’t tell me. I should know this. I really should.

 
 

This isn’t just epic fail, this is Cecil Fucking B. DeMille epic fail.

I’d try to add something to this but why mess with perfection?

 
 

Appropros of the non appropos, this is a good time to share this and this.

 
 

Capn Fatback said,

May 15, 2009 at 19:20

Serious question: Regarding our troll, do people other than Wonkette commenters refer to Obama as “Hopey”?

Sirius question: Which part of the dog does the brightest star form?

I’ve submitted your question to the crowd, Capn.

 
 

More attention to national security, all else equal, helps Republicans, and Cheney is certainly getting attention.

1937 Translation: More attention to the flammable nature of hydrogen, all else equal, helps the dirigible industry, and the Hindenburg is certainly getting attention.

 
 

Sirius question: Which part of the dog does the brightest star form?

Dog PENIS

(NOTE: NSFW)

 
 

You could have at least photoshopped Mickey Kaus in there. That would be real scandal, cheating on his goats like that.

 
 

Thanks, Thunder.

Regarding the Grand Unified Troll Theory: Don’t forget the Gruff Corollary, which states, “Trip-trap, trip trap, trip trap.”

 
 

You dim libs don’t understand Raucous Kangaroo’s point because you’re not reading him properly. You have to imagine you’re hearing his columns trilled in an extremely high-pitched, toothache-inducing voice to get the full effect.

 
 

I love that story! Which one was “my pet goat?”

WP gets fucked by gruff goats.

 
 

What, we have to imagine he’s Sarah Palin?

 
 

Tim Graham has Rawmess Poopoopydoo’s back.

Question for the Post: how do we know these “Republicans” aren’t strategists for Arlen Specter? We don’t. They’re anonymous. How many is “many” if they’re too afraid to go public?

 
 

Am I the only one who has nothing to do today?

 
 

Sorry, PeeJ, I’m sobering up from lunch.

 
 

OT – Shorter Viktor David Hasselhoff: “Sarah Palin would’ve been a much better president.”

He’s been sniffing those powdered scrolls from the library again, hasn’t he?

 
 

Am I the only one who has nothing to do today?

You could make me a radially rotating set of Mark Noonan’s eyebrows.

 
 

This is OT but I thought you’d appreciate reading about the latest homophobic lies spread by the American Family Assn’s hilariously-named columnist Charlie Butts (get it? BUTTS! ha ha), who is spreading the conclusive new scientific proof that there is no gay gene which PROVES gays aren’t born they just like the parties and the flamboyant outfits.

 
 

What, we have to imagine he’s Sarah Palin?

God, no. Considerably less masculine. Think coloratura.

 
 

You could make me a radially rotating set of Mark Noonan’s eyebrows.

Dude, that’s just so totally wrong.

 
 

Think coloratura.

I thought Honda discontinued that model.

 
 

Umm, he must be sniffing something. If I’m not mistaken, if the Repugs had won the election it would of been the first 100 days of the Mcain presidency. Although, come to think of it, it is the new tradition for Repugs to have the vice president run things so the president can clear brush or something.

 
You Can't Put Lipstick On A Repig
 

If I’m not mistaken, if the Repugs had won the election it would of been the first 100 days of the Mcain presidency.

McPOW is a non-entity to the repigs now. All they care about is their fabulous SARAH!, and the pictures they keep of her to wack with.

 
 

This isn’t just epic fail, this is Cecil Fucking B. DeMille epic fail.

Ramesh is so ready for his close-up.

 
 

the conclusive new scientific proof that there is no gay gene which PROVES gays aren’t born

Gosh, there’s no gene for being born a dumbass either, so I guess they don’t exist, even though the AFA conclusively disproves that every day.

 
 

PROVES gays aren’t born

So he’s saying they’re hatched? Cloned? Spontaneously spring from Zeus’ forehead? What?

 
 

So he’s saying they’re hatched? Cloned? Spontaneously spring from Zeus’ forehead? What?

It provides conclusive proof that the government should regulate boner activity.

 
 

“…having Cynthia McKinney talking about it on every single news show…”

Uh, guys, you kicked McKinney out of the party years ago, remember? She’s Green Party now. You know, Green Party? That’s the party you cheeto-chewing do-nothing demotard pwoggie-bloggies think was invented by Karl Rove to sabotage your beloved corporate owned war mongering cesspit Republicrat Party? Remember? Helloooooooo?

 
 

So he’s saying they’re hatched? Cloned? Spontaneously spring from Zeus’ forehead? What?

He’s suggesting in his boneheaded way that they recruit sweet young chicks into their perverted lifestyles, which means TEH GHEY must be kept away from the kids and if that means they can’t participate in normal day-to-day life oh what a shame.

Basically they should just get back in their damn closets and lock the doors, is what he’s saying.

 
 

cheeto-chewing do-nothing demotard pwoggie-bloggies

How very witty, Wilde, how very very witty!

 
 

So he’s saying they’re hatched? Cloned? Spontaneously spring from Zeus’ forehead? What?

They choose the lifestyle because wearing feather boas and gay sex is obviously worth the homophobia and intolerance they face every day.

 
Rusty Shackleford
 

Rasmussen finds hole in ground, declares it ass

 
 

They choose the lifestyle because wearing feather boas and gay sex is obviously worth the homophobia and intolerance they face every day.

Just like this

 
 

Spontaneously spring from Zeus’ forehead?

Talk about your mina shot! Which reminds me of:
There was once a sculptor named Phidias
Whose knowledge of art was invidious.
He carved Aphrodite
Without any nightie,
Which startled the purely fastidious.

 
 

Of course gays aren’t born. They’re recruited, everyone knows that. I’m proud to say I met my quota years ago.

 
Dragon-King Wangchuck
 

re: VDH’s Preznit Mooseburger.

Wow. Not just your regular Sour Grapes – but one where he just hand waves aside the mysterious Death John Sidney McCain the Third.

 
 

Uh, guys, you kicked McKinney out of the party years ago, remember? She’s Green Party now.

Ah, she’s on the short bus!

 
 

Oh, hey, speaking of TEH GHEY we’re on the cutting edge of tolerance and suchlike here in Sow Calinah:

COLUMBIA, S.C. — South Carolina lawmakers want to prevent violence in teen relationships but won’t allow a new school program aimed at curbing such abuse to mention gay and lesbian partnerships.

State representatives voted overwhelmingly Thursday to bar any mention of homosexual relationships in the new program for middle and high school students. The move was pushed by lawmakers who said they don’t want schools teaching about gay relationships and said they doubt those partnerships have high levels of abuse.

 
 

South Carolina lawmakers want to prevent violence in teen relationships but won’t allow a new school program aimed at curbing such abuse to mention gay and lesbian partnerships.

So it will be OK to beat a kid up for being gay, but not for supporting Duke over SC State?

Gee…that’s harsh.

 
 

hey doubt those partnerships have high levels of abuse.

And they’re right! We’re simply faaabulous to each other. It’s the abuse from lawmakers that’s the problem.

 
 

Let’s get to the Crux of this matter

 
 

So it will be OK to beat a kid up for being gay, but not for supporting Duke over SC State?

See, if they so much as mention TEH GHEY in front of the kids the lil’ zombies will HAVE to engage in same-sex activities. It’s just common sense!

Besides, if they catch a straight kid gaybashing all he has to do is claim it was a lover’s spat and he’ll go free. Not that he wouldn’t in the first place, of course.

 
Rusty Shackleford
 

See, if they so much as mention TEH GHEY in front of the kids the lil’ zombies will HAVE to engage in same-sex activities. It’s just common sense!

Replace TEH GHEY with TEH STRATE and same-sex with opposite (h/t Prejean) and that’s exactly what happened to me.

 
 

Ten percent is not enough! Recruit! Recruit! Recruit!

 
 

Ten percent is not enough! Recruit! Recruit! Recruit!

What’s the pay like?

 
 

See, if they so much as mention TEH GHEY in front of the kids the lil’ zombies will HAVE to engage in same-sex activities.

Must. Hab. Buttsecks.

 
 

Following up on RB’s query: Is there a health-insurance plan available?

 
Dragon-King Wangchuck
 

I see it eventually turning into one of those reverse-psychology things you see in sit-coms all the time. One of the school administrators will tell the guys drafting up teh bill that “not mentioning Teh Ghey” won’t stop “Teh Ghey” from spreading. Stuff that dweeby growed-ups don’t know about is “off the hizzy”.

Then they’ll come up with a plan where they’ll prevent vulnerable youths from “Going Alt Lifestyle” by showing them that the old farts are all over Teh Ghey, and homo-curiosity is basically teh new bridge club.

And then the wives find out!

 
Big Bad Bald Bastard
 

The move was pushed by lawmakers who said they don’t want schools teaching about gay relationships and said they doubt those partnerships have high levels of abuse.

Is this not a tacit admission (obviously not intended) that ho-mo-seck-soo-al relationships are superior to “opposite” relationships?

 
 

Also, PENIS.

 
 

Bunny the elephant just passed away at the elephant sanctuary.

Maria writes “Jesus rode once on a donkey. Maybe Jesus will ride [Bunny] around in Heaven sometime.”

Uh, sure thing, Maria. (Even in heaven, an elephant can’t get any respect.]

 
Big Bad Bald Bastard
 

Funny how the wingnuts think Mr 9% Approval Rating can polish the turd that is the GOP.

And, PENIS.

 
 

Also, PENIS.

But then there’s what Cristiano Ronaldo is LOOKING at!

 
Big Bad Bald Bastard
 

Kinda puts the kibosh on dear old Ogden’s thesis.

 
 

More OT, but just wanted to share this latest nugget from an email by teh Simcox Campaign:

Almost 60% of those polled said they would like to know more about me. That bodes very well for our campaign.

 
 

Almost 60% of those polled said they would like to know more about me.

“Of those, nearly 75% had screennames like ‘Papabear4cub’ and ‘HotSteaminRod’ “

 
 

[consider] that national security is still one of the Republican party’s best issues.

Er. Doesn’t the poll say exactly the opposite?

 
Big Bad Bald Bastard
 

Almost 80% of those polled said they would like to know more about turtle dongs. That bodes very well for our chelonian overlords.

[consider] that national security is still one of the Republican party’s best issues.
Er. Doesn’t the poll say exactly the opposite?

Not really- it just underscores how fucked the GOP is on all other issues.

 
 

Victor Sparta Davis’ point is that the librul medja all luv and worship Barack Insane Osama but if Sarah Palin had done the exact same things, they’d be all over her.

LIke, his imitation of Paul Krugman criticizing Obama for growing the deficit too much, except re-writing that as Krugman snotting off at Palin.

What? What’s that?

You mean, Krugman criticized Obama for spending too little instead of for “red ink”, thus completely undermining “300” Sparta Davis Hansen’ entire satire?

That’s unfair. If Sarah Palin had written that blog post instead of THISISSPARTA Hansen, it would have totally been criticized by the liberal pro-word media.

 
 

Stuff that dweeby growed-ups don’t know about is “off the hizzy”.

Do what now?

 
 

I’d like to know more about Simcox. Very much more.

 
 

That’s unfair. If Sarah Palin had written that blog post instead of THISISSPARTA Hansen, it would have totally been criticized by the liberal pro-word media.

What’s Greek for “WOLVERINES!”?

 
 

same-sex zombies?

TEH GAAA.

 
 

????????? ??? ??? ?????!

Well… that’s the singular anyway. Or so Teh Gazoogle tells me.

 
Big Bad Bald Bastard
 

What’s Greek for “WOLVERINES!”?

Babelfish gives ???????? as the singular. A re-translation into English gives us devouring. The name of the beast in most Indo-European languages references its gluttony, so I trust Babelfish on this one.

 
Big Bad Bald Bastard
 

ARGH! Beaten to the punch, and stymied by WordPress! Oh, the ignominy.

 
 

That’s a good’un, RB. But also take a gander at the internet frequency of usage chart. Who’d a thunk?

 
 

Let’s get to the Crux of this matter

I understand now why I came this way.

 
 

And “The Truth” is indeed so small, but I ain’t running.

 
 

σαρκοφάγο ζώο του βορρά!

(it works in preview…)

 
 

Again with the FYWP

 
 

Maybe we can’t hide from Pravda, but I suppose we could always pants him and lock him in his own locker. Or stuff him into a trunk marked “TIMBKTU” and ship him off.

 
 

That’s interesting. WP is indeed the bastard. If your browser “does” those unicode char’s* – as does mine and, one concludes, yours – then it’s something nefarious in WP. This should come as no surprise.

* Go ahead, try to say that’s an inappropriate apostrophe. G’wan, g’head, try.

FYWP. And such as. Also.

 
 

I’d like to know more about Simcox. Very much more.

Well, the wingnut candidate for Arizona Senator is not to be confused with the new game by Electronic Arts, for starters.

 
 

σαρκοφάγο ζώο του βορρά

 
Green Party Member
 

You know, we all tried to warn you that Obama wouldn’t be much different from a Republican President.

Are you going to admit we were right after all now?

 
 

Christ, Tintin, I was eating when I read that post.

As much as I enjoy this site, I know better than to access it just before or during a meal.

 
 

I trust you had H. R. Giger’s permission to use that image at the top.

 
Nobody don't like a cute young lesbian
 

All’s I know, every time I see it I can’t help but think of the chick from “Love & Rockets”

 
 

You know, we all tried to warn you that Obama wouldn’t be much different from a Republican President.

Are you going to admit we were right after all now?

I’ll admit that you deserve a good hard kick in the ass for handing the 2000 election to George W. Bush. And I’ll admit that anyone who still listens to you deserves one too.

 
 

Ramesh better get out of there before Pantload or K-Load appear, lest we see the headline “Ramesh Ponnuru] lost to crack”.

 
 

Getting there the hard way – III – climbing Station Wolverine Triangulation party of William M. Scaife. Credit: Coast & Geodetic Survey Historical Image Collection.

From scrolling not as far down on the Webster’s Wolverine page (Photo Album: Wolverine).

Triangulation party? Scaife? Is this code?

 
 

Do Greens bite off their own testicles to escape from hunters?

 
 

I saw Solis at a triangulation party once. She was, ah, cute.

 
 

@M.Bouffant: Note code, surveying. This particular Scaife was evidently an officer in the US Coast & Geodetic Survey.

 
 

Image ID: theb0733, NOAA’s Historic Coast & Geodetic Survey (C&GS) Collection
Location: Central Alaska
Photo Date: 1923
Credit: NOAA Photo Library, NOAA Central Library; C&GS Season’s Report Scaife 1924

Sadly, no, It would appear,

Get off my fucking ass WP!

 
 

*snork*

It being slow and all, and since this isn’t entirely OT, here’s Paul Begala:

This is a wonderful gift for the Democrats. At precisely the time when they need to nurture new leaders, Dick Cheney and Rush Limbaugh are sucking up all the oxygen – and, believe me, these two really do suck.

 
 

Stay on target.

 
Green Party Member
 

We didn’t hand the election to George W. Bush, Al Gore did when he didn’t fight hard enough in the Florida Recount.

Anyway Gore was a Corporate Fascist too, and wouldn’t have been much different from Bush.

Joe Lieberman as VP, anyone?

He would have invaded Iraq, too.

 
 

You’d expect Ponnuru to be more concerned about the interests of the Republican party or of a Conservative value-system, rather than defending a corrupt lying sociopath of a discredited politician who seems to have no recognisable values at all.

As someone was pointing out the other day — Cheney’s appeal to the national-security angle, in order to tie Torture around the neck of Republicanism as one of its core values, is contradicted by Lawrence Wilkerson’s report that “no torture or harsh interrogation techniques were employed by any U.S. interrogator for the entire second term of Cheney-Bush.” If the argument is taken seriously, Obama could not open up the US to terrorism, since Cheney had already done that 4 years earlier.
Sooner or later people will see which way the wind is blowing and start asking Cheney the difficult questions, and it will be harder and harder to find a member of the US electorate who ever voted for Cheney-Bush.

 
 

Joe Lieberman as VP, anyone?

He would have invaded Iraq, too.

Just to get a good deal on a couple of rugs, too.

 
Green Party Member
 

Barack Obama is just a new smiley black face of the ruling corporate class. You all will realze that, sooner or late. At least those of you that don’t have Battered Progressive Syndrome.

 
 

If the argument is taken seriously, Obama could not open up the US to terrorism, since Cheney had already done that 4 years earlier.

Well, jeez, what we did was hardly torture it was just fratboy hijinks and it was for a good reason and it wasn’t torture at all just questioning and those people like it rough and you can’t deter a suicider so it’s okay and life is cheap to them and they want to kill us all and it wasn’t torture anyway so what’s wrong? Oh, and ticking time bombs.

(Note: In my stream-of-consciousness stressed out state this eve I started to type “terrorism” instead of “torture”. There’s a Freudian slip for you.)

 
 

Barack Obama is just a new smiley black face of the ruling corporate class…

Other than the idiot Sambo contextualizing, yeah, anybody who wasn’t a 12 year old dope knows that Presidents of the USA generally act within the limits established by the enormous influence of the U.S. upper classes.

But the historically naive think saying such a thing is the end of the argument, when instead it’s just the beginning. That’s why you get people who think that jacking off to Ralph Nader is some sort of sophisticated argument, about as serious as people pointing out that we’d all be better off if this were Star Trek’s Federation instead of reality.

 
 

Karl Marx was a grownup, and knew very well it mattered which bourgeois rulers and which bourgeois policies ran countries.

 
 

Karl Marx was a grownup

Though he was known to play hopscotch when Engels wasn’t looking.

 
Green Party Member
 

Sambo?

I was going more for “Uncle Tom” for the ruling class.

They’re really quite clever putting out a smiling minority face who spews out vague platitudes while pursuing a corporatist agenda. And so-called progressives in the Republicrat Party just eat it right up.

Obama could shit in a jar and people like you would call it chocolate ice cream, El Cid.

 
 

They’re really quite clever putting out a smiling minority face who spews out vague platitudes while pursuing a corporatist agenda.

KONSERN TRLL IS KONCERNED

 
Green Party Member
 

Anyone that says single-payer is “off the table” isn’t worth the time of day.

 
Sir Windblown Dentist
 

You guys don’t seriously think “Green Party Member” is legit, do you?

With cheezy mid-Fifties sci-fi space echo: “You Cannot Escape the Tooth!”

 
 

You guys don’t seriously think “Green Party Member” is legit, do you?

Although marihuana (or ’green’) parties are indeed resurgent among today’s delinquent youths, I am reliably informed that in the hippity-hop lexicon of modern young whippersnappers the appertinent accoutrements are more likely to be denoted contemporaneously as ‘dank’, ‘chronic’, or ‘teh stikcy-ikcy’.

 
 

It would be even more fun if the disemvowler could disemvowl the trolls, then re-invowl them with the wrong vowels for extra lulz.

…or is that asking too much?

 
Workers World Party Member
 

Fuck all y’all greens. Buncha fuckin pretend leftists.

 
Party for Socialism and Liberation Member
 

Workers World Party? More like Stupid Turd Party.

 
 

It would be really nice if the dancing badgers would do a little pause in their routine to take a deep, long draught of Tears of Impotent Wingnut Rage, emit a polite little badger belch, and continue their dance number.

 
 

Workers World Party? More like Stupid Turd Party.

Hey, now! An insult to one is an insult to all!

 
 

*sigh* I appear to be in moderation Hell. If one of our esteemed hosts could see fit to remedy this, I’d be obliged.

 
 

“The best part about being a wingnut is being able to argue your case based on an alternate and completely speculative universe where pretty much anything that might help your argument could have happened.”

Yeah! Like if Al Gore hadn’t been elected, we’d never have attacked Iraq!

 
Green Party Member
 

Al Gore would have attacked Iraq, too.

Remember it was Clinton who first made ” regime change” an official policy.

 
 

People, the stupid fake troll is stupid. And fake.

Get it?

 
 

[A]nd, second, [consider] that national security is still one of the Republican party’s best issues.

When, you know, they aren’t letting massive terror attacks slip by the DoJ ’cause the guy in charge was more concerned with breasts & bongs than doing his job, or when they’re letting plotters of the aforementioned terrorism slip away for whatever reason, or using the already referenced terror to invade acountry that had nothing to do with said terror and then proceeding to secure the oil fields first before anything else, or alienating foreign governments with childish stunts, or kissing up to future terrorists in the name of short-term political advantage (c.f. Gulbuddin Hekmatyar and the muhajidheen), or kissing up to monarchists and dictators for futher short-term advantage and ensuring the popualtion of their countries remain a convenient recruiting ground for terrorists, or using fucking made-up TV SHOWS to justify human rights violations, or screwing the troops they deployed in a shitty illegal war by letting their corporate buddies serve those troops maggot-infested meals, or setting up a star-spangled all-American Stasi, or cutting funds for the VA, or labeling vets coming back from their illegal wars (q.v.) as “security risks”, or requring stupid hijinks like banning peanut butter from airplanes because of information about a bullshit “bomb plot” that was probably obtained from torture (q,v,, as was the justification for said illegal war, q.v.) or allowing their milita-type buddies to threaten violent insurrection without arresting them as “domestic terrorists” while harassing environmentalists, or sending siiting Repug governors and Senators out to call for violent insurrection against their own government,,,

yeah, other than all that and more, one of their “best issues”.

 
 

Your “messiah” is running this country like an effeminate coward. He seems to have more concern for the humane treatment of our nation’s enemies, than for the security of our homeland.

By disallowing torture and closing down guantanamo bay, Obama is not only showing his extreme niavety on national security, he is also making it easier for our nation’s enemies to do us harm.

The man is a laughing stock. At least Bush was seen by our nation’s enemies as a man who would fight tooth and nail to defend our homeland. A man who they knew would not be intimidated by their saber rattling. Obama on the other hand is quite correctly seen as weak and niave.

As I’ve said many times, this war will only be won if we have leaders willing to do whatever it takes to defeat islamic fascism and defend our homeland.

 
Social Party of Working Greens
 

SPLITTERS!!

 
 

Lord Harry Haw-Haw said,

May 16, 2009 at 1:45

Fixed that for you.

 
 

Boy, the troll is versatile. One minute it’s whining at us that we aren’t being properly Leftist and the next it’s going all “Exterminate the brutes!”.Truly Zelig-esque, in a twisted non-Zelig way.

 
 

Shorter Lord Harry:

Nobody will fuck me.

 
 

Regardless of whether or not torture is effective in getting proper confessions, It can still be used as an effective deterent.

Let’s say that torture is completely ineffective in getting accurate confessions from terrorists? So what! It should still be used for it’s deterent factor.

If America openly and publiclly tortures captured terrorists, then every single potential terrorist would know the horrors that awaits them if they to take up arms against the United States. Thus possibly detering many mohammedans from engaging in terrorist acts against the United States.

America needs strong leaders willing to do whatever it takes to defend our Homeland. Obama is not that leader.

 
Green Party Member
 

I am not Lord Harry. Ask your admins to do an IP check if u don’t believe me.

 
 

I remember my father and a friend of his having an argument about Pinochet and the virtues of ruling with an iron fist (the friend was a Reagan zealot). The friend remarked “At least under Pinochet, you could leave your wallet lying in the village square, come back a day later, and it would still be there.” My father replied “Maybe. Sadly, the same couldn’t necessarily be said of your wife or child if you left them in the city square, if the secret police happened by.”

 
 

Badgers! We don’t need no stinkin’ badgers.
http://www.weebls-stuff.com/toons/badgers/

 
 

Hell, Lord Harry isn’t Lord Harry — he’s Lindsay Graham’s cabana boy.

 
 

Lord Harry’s post probably sounded better in the original German.

 
 

A top! A top! My kingdom for a top!

 
 

“Lord Harry is really Henrietta Rolland, a young lady who has assumed the guise of a gentleman to track down and kill Jason Cavandar, the marquess of Oberlon, the man she believes responsible for her brother Damien’s death at the Battle of Waterloo.”
http://ebookstore.sony.com/ebook/catherine-coulter/lord-harry/_/R-400000000000000032578

 
 

Regardless of whether or not torture is effective in getting proper confessions, It can still be used as an effective deterent.

So having been proven ineffective as a conduit for information, you are now reduced to the “tear the wings off flies” argument?

Sad. Very sad. How do you shave without looking at your face in the mirror?

 
 

Torture most certainly is an effective deterent. However, just like the death penalty, the problem is, it isn’t used often and publicly enough.

Just is the death penalty when used correctly provides an effective deterent, so too will torture.

Let me ask you this, let’s say your’re a shoplifter, you’ve been shop lifting for years with no consequence more severe than a slap on the wrist. But now there is a new leader whose policy is to have the right hand of shoplifters severed. Would you still shoplift knowing this?

 
 

Torture is very effective at creating the kind of hatred, hostility and resistance that keeps the Great Game going. Sky Masterson Obama has the dice in his hands now. Look out, boys. The Military Industrial Complex and the National Security State, forever and ever. Amen.

 
 

“Let me ask you this, let’s say your’re a shoplifter, you’ve been shop lifting for years with no consequence more severe than a slap on the wrist. But now there is a new leader whose policy is to have the right hand of shoplifters severed. Would you still shoplift knowing this?”

This boy is making sense, praise Allah!

 
Sir Windblown Dentist
 

But doesn’t torture have the effect of radicalizing the subject? Look at how many former GTMO detainees have “returned” to the battlefield, when in actuality they are going there for the first time.

And you can’t torture a successful suicide bomber. (The colleagues of an unsuccessful one would likely welcome harsh interrogations, knowing he’d probably fuck up they didn’t share actionable with him.) Also.

 
 

M. Bouffant said,
May 16, 2009 at 1:15

WOBBLIES!!!

WEEBLE WOBBLIES!

 
 

St00pit trool remains st00pit, but I am reminded of a good video:

Tom Waits, Singapore

(Sadly, the video I was thinking of has been removed…so you get Tom Waits and Jack Sparrow.)

 
 

More famous history lessons from people who don’t think there’s any difference between which ruling-party backed capitalist candidate governs the nation, that they’re all the same, and anyone who says otherwise is just not as radical:

‘Herr Brüning has expressed it very clearly; once they (the Nazis) are in power, the united front of the proletariat will emerge and make a clean sweep of everything … We are not afraid of the fascists. They will shoot their bolt quicker than any other government.’

Remmele, KPD leader, speaking in the Reichstag, October 1931.

 
 

I will repeat a question for Lord Harry that he didn’t have the balls to answer the other day. In what way, shape or manner do you rationalize being morally better than Bin Laden or Saddam? Is it because you eat pork? Is it because your rape rooms would have Bon Jovi blaring over the loudspeakers? Is it because they are men of action and you, only of words? [God I hope so] Help us understand your warped thinking.

Yeah I know, waste of time.

 
 

But now there is a new leader whose policy is to have the right hand of shoplifters severed.

We’ve already got that one covered.

 
Sir Windblown Dentist
 

The post-9/11 Gore thought-experiment isn’t an uninteresting one.

It’s arguable that the attacks on the WTC and the Pentagon wouldn’t have happened under Gore, but he would have been forced to deal with the foiled plot, not to mention the aftermath from the Cole attack–blah blah blah.

Based on just the public intelligence available back then, a case to fuck up Pakistan’s shit (or at least the ISI) was far more tenable than Iraq. And there we could have had Bhutto to install into power, where the Bushites had the much-hated Chalabi.

 
 

Digby kindly offers a modest proposal to help resolve the fact that key Congressional Democrats are disagreeing that the CIA ‘briefed’ them in the ways currently being claimed, and apparently the media feel that there’s ‘no way’ to really know.

Nancy Pelosi says she wasn’t told about waterboarding in 2002 and that the CIA misled the congress. Bob Graham says he wasn’t told either. Richard Shelby says he was, sort of. Porter Goss says he wasn’t but everyone thinks he said he was. The classified briefings have been sent up to Capitol Hill and Republican Senator Kit Bond, who says he has seen them, claims they prove that Pelosi is lying. (He also claims that Pelosi could have called for closed hearings on the subject, which is disputed by the rules of the House.)…

…since they are considered by so many people to be reliable and useful, perhaps ought to consider using some enhanced interrogation techniques on the principals so we can get to the truth of this matter. After all, if they were reliable enough to keep the nation safe from evildoers, they would certainly be reliable enough to get politicians and bureaucrats to admit what happened in some CIA briefings.

And it’s not like this stuff is torture or anything. It doesn’t equal the pain equivalent to organ failure. It doesn’t leave many marks and there is supposedly no lasting psychological damage, so it’s hard to see why any of these people would object to being put to the test on the waterboard. And since we have a very complete rule book in those OLC memos, which according to numerous commenters, are very well reasoned and totally within in the purview of the president to authorize, we can use them as the guideline…

…Diapering, forced enemas, walling, solitary confinement and being put in coffins with bugs will only be used if the subjects refuse to admit what they’ve done. (We’re not completely uncivilized, after all.)…

…So, let’s “interrogate” the lot of them — Cheney, Pelosi, Graham, Goss, Shelby, Kit Bond, the CIA briefers, anyone on the Senate and House staffs who may have been privy to these classified hearings. In my view, to fail to use these techniques is a slap in the face to all the fine American military personnel who ever went through the SERE program. As far as I’m concerned, we might as well be spitting on the troops if we don’t agree to start using torture on members of the US Government.

 
 

Of course it matters which wing of the Property Party happens to be in control. I simply note, with more amusement than surprise, the nearly identical justifications, rationalizations, and equivocations being made for Obama as were made for Bush by the (boo! hiss!) deluded, loyal Republican partisans. There are differences between the parties, between politicians within the parties, but there are lines none dare cross and, when we see these demonstrations of piety to the capitalists who finance, you know, everything, it’s fun and instructive to watch deluded loyalists run half-baked justifications up the flagpole to see who salutes.

 
 

Cheney/Bush would have gone to war with Iraq six month earlier if there was no 9/11. As it turned out, they had to pretend to care about the Taliban first.

 
 

And if 9/11/2001 had managed to still happen under Gore (though I can’t imagine him imitating a retarded fake Texan and waving away urgent security alerts with “You’ve covered your ass”), the result would have been that within 2, maybe 3 days there would have been legions of right wingers and Republican politicians with torches and pitchforks in front of the White House demanding that the President which had allowed the biggest ever attack on U.S. soil either be impeached, resign immediately, or simply hauled out by the mob.

 
 

Did anyone notice that, right on the heels of Obama announcing that he’s not going to release the photos after all, there’s been an uptick in statements from many quarters that Cheney was ordering torture personally on specific detainees, and that detainees were being tortured to obtain statements to establish a link between Saddam and al-Quaeda?

Odd, that. One almost wonders whether there was some low-key whisper campaign to coordinate taking down the Dick, or if somehow the cloud of malevolence he spread around for 8 years just reached critical mass when it started to look like things might just be swept under the rug.

If it were to turn out that this is the beginning of the Night of the Long Knives for Cheney, I think my head would explode in an orgy of rainbows and unicorns and Care Bears.

 
 

Cheney/Bush would have gone to war with Iraq six month earlier if there was no 9/11.

Maybe. But if you remember way back to early 2001 it looked like they were trying to push us towards a confrontation with China.

Remember all the “OMG! The ChiComs are taking over the Panama Canal!” stuff from back then?

 
 

I see no evidence that Gore would have gone to war with Iraq. Thinking so, makes the post partisan/ green guy feel like a cool radical because everyone is evil and corrupt except him.

 
 

Tintin! Disemvowel me, please! I desperately need someone to make me funny!

 
Green Party Member
 

huh. huhhhh. I said member.

 
Sir Windblown Dentist
 

The press was obsessed with shark attacks in Summer Aught-One. And I remember thinking that if that spy plane crash in China had happened under Clinton, it wouldn’t have had to be resolved over the airwaves.

 
 

I simply note, with more amusement than surprise, the nearly identical justifications, rationalizations, and equivocations being made for Obama as were made for Bush by the (boo! hiss!) deluded, loyal Republican partisans.

That’s not true at all. You’re not distinguishing in any way between those who are pushing the sort of ass-kissing arguments you suggest and people who don’t but still aren’t stimulated to go around barking OBAMA = BUSH WHUR’S MY GREEN FANTASSEE GUBMIT.

And even objectively the argument is ridiculous — no matter how much you detest and despise those lockstep ‘liberals’ who always back the mod-con Democratic Party establishment, there just is no similarity at all between the lockjaw worship of Bush Jr. as Reagan II we saw from late 2001 to 2005 and complete lack of any dissent among the Republican minions and the heated debate going on in what forums do exist among grassroots Democrats and independents who frequently vote Democratic.

Where? Where were the heated debates among Republicans about whether or not the Iraq policy was wrong, or whether torture was right? A few Republican dissidents often guest-hosted on leftie / lib sites, a few individual bloggers, Ron Paul — that. Outside of that you got USA! USA! USA!

That’s why everyone recognizes you as a cheap troll.

 
Sir Windblown Dentist
 

Just like Kerry and Poland, I forgot about Chandra Levy.

 
 

I can’t speak for the “Green Guy” (though Green was a hell of a good album), but I don’t think Gore would have used 9/11 as an excuse to go to war with Iraq. I think he would have committed us even more heavily in Afghanistan, and possibly gotten us into hot water with Pakistan. The prospect of going into Iraq had had neo-Cons panting and twitching for a long long time and they finally got their excuse.

That said, if you think Gore would not have responded by bombing the shit out of somebody, and if you think that bombing would not have had deep repercussions, and if you think that one result of those repercussions would not have been enormous profits for the capitalists who finance both wings of the Property Party, there we disagree.

 
 

Yeah, Gore would have bombed somebody, and might have even done more of the routine Clinton-style bombing of Iraqi neighborhoods, but the lack of an actual invasion would have saved the lives of hundreds of thousands or millions of Iraqi civilians. And not because Gore was super-noble, it’s just that he wasn’t on the nut squad wanting to invade Iraq. Good god, even the Bush Sr. people were like, ‘WTF, RU KRZEE?’

 
 

Sad. Very sad. How do you shave without looking at your face in the mirror?
Not an issue, I suspect.

 
Green -- Well, Actually Sort of Chartreuse and Puce Around the Edges -- Party Member (Huh-Huhh, I Said Member)
 

You know, we’re all emotionally-adolescent losers who don’t have the first clue about politics or policy or how to get things done, and we’ll never really be a major party because we’re so clueless and sanctimonious and don’t really know anything about government, even after the Reptilian party finally gasps its last breath and the next election includes at least three parties, one of which won’t be us because we’re retarded assholes.

Are you going to admit we were right after all now?

 
 

Citizen Cid:

And even objectively the argument is ridiculous — no matter how much you detest and despise those lockstep ‘liberals’ who always back the mod-con Democratic Party establishment, there just is no similarity at all between the lockjaw worship of Bush Jr. as Reagan II we saw from late 2001 to 2005 and complete lack of any dissent among the Republican minions and the heated debate going on in what forums do exist among grassroots Democrats and independents who frequently vote Democratic.

Ahh. I never said there was “no dissent”. There is, at the moment, in certain marginalized sections of the Left, so marginalized that they can say what they want without fear of Rahm showing up in the middle of the night and taking a baseball bat to their Honda Civic, dissent. I simply note with amusement that dissent is far less strident than was the dissent to every move and every breath Bush took. Absolutists under Bush have transformed, happily and with great self-satisfaction, into Realist Centrists now that what they believe to be their team is in power.

Also, Digby seems genuinely outraged, which is adorable, because I’m starting to believe she really believed what she believed she believed all along and is genuinely shocked by the present state of affairs.

Good luck to the leftists who want Obama to do the right thing. Good luck to the ones who want Madame Speaker’s head on a stick. We’re on the same side. It’s the ones who suddenly say “Now hold on a minute…let’s just see where he’s going with this….” that bring me such bemused amusement.

 
 

Disemvoweled troll: The Whole Truth and Nothing But The Truth said

Shit I love Tintin threads, he is WICKED on that disemvoweller! Oh and I love the way it makes these assface pindicks sound like little yappie dogs that you just want to kick across the room cause they keep nippin at yr heels. But oh I should resent the fuck outta tintin cause I did get caught up in one of his initial disemvoweling purges when I was innocently–and yea intoxicatedly–parodying a troll late on a Saturday night and got carried away, but i just took it as tintin sayin ‘last call asshole get the fuck out the joint!’ so it’s all good. Ok like nobody knows WTF I’m talking about but my point was why doesn’t that rasmussen thing ever do polls like ‘Do you ever use your teeth to open food containers and whatnot that have that impenetrable plastic shit all around it?’ (my answer like most men would be of course Almost Always) instead of asking what anybody thinks about anything said by ex-Vp Dick.

(Ok obviously I have started indulging early so I dare not post again since I dare not risk the Wrath of Tintin!)

 
Green Party Member
 

Repulicrats=Demopublicans.

The sooner you realize that, the sooner you will recover, Democratic “progressives”.

 
 

Citizen Cid:
Yeah, Gore would have bombed somebody, and might have even done more of the routine Clinton-style bombing of Iraqi neighborhoods, but the lack of an actual invasion would have saved the lives of hundreds of thousands or millions of Iraqi civilians. And not because Gore was super-noble, it’s just that he wasn’t on the nut squad wanting to invade Iraq. Good god, even the Bush Sr. people were like, ‘WTF, RU KRZEE?’

You’re absolutely right. There was a schism between some Golden Age Republicans (say what you will about GHWB, he didn’t duck military service the way Quayle, Clinton, Bush, Cheney, et al did) who actually seemed to have both moral and intellectual capacities that exceeded that of a starving rat in a burning meth lab.

As for Gore, if you can confidently say he would not have entangled us anywhere longterm, either by design or via unintended consequences, then you know Gore’s temperament, the political temperament of the time, and the repercussions of any retaliation on the geopolitical situation eerily, almost supernaturally, well. I don’t doubt Gore’s intentions might have been better. I don’t understand why more liberals didn’t rise to his defense when the media ground him up and spit him out during the election cycle.

 
 

Its like I was saying the other day, if punk music didn’t have any punk musicians in it, then maybe punk music wouldn’t suck ass harder than any other genre of music in the history of homo sapiens.

Howdy, stoopid punk bitchiz!

 
 

Jennifer, the best part is that no one is doing more to bring this stuff out than Cheney himself. Had he just shat, er, shut up it may well have quietly died.

 
 

And if 9/11/2001 had managed to still happen under Gore (though I can’t imagine him imitating a retarded fake Texan and waving away urgent security alerts with “You’ve covered your ass”), the result would have been that within 2, maybe 3 days there would have been legions of right wingers and Republican politicians with torches and pitchforks in front of the White House demanding that the President which had allowed the biggest ever attack on U.S. soil either be impeached, resign immediately, or simply hauled out by the mob.

President Gore would have been impeached months before that, simply by virtue of having won the election.

 
 

Aren’t my turds adorable? And they don’t stink!

 
parcel post partisan
 

I’m partial to posts penetrating my poopchute.

 
 

I simply note with amusement that dissent is far less strident than was the dissent to every move and every breath Bush took. Absolutists under Bush have transformed, happily and with great self-satisfaction, into Realist Centrists now that what they believe to be their team is in power.

Why amused? It’s kind of a normal state of affairs for people to be less “strident” towards the guy who might not punish the torturers than they were against, you know, the actual torturers. There’s quite a large difference there.

I think you’re making a leap of faith in assuming that this is over, while I don’t believe that it is. As I posted upthread, hot on the heels of the announcement that these photos would not be released, there’s all this chatter building around Cheney. That motherfucker is one hated individual, and it would not be at all surprising if a large number of people with pieces of incriminating information about his role in instituting and carrying out a torture regime started suddenly leaking like sieves if they thought he was gonna get away with it, and worse yet, continue to spread his bad mojo all over the airwaves. If this stuff is showing up in the news, it’s damn well been circulating in the background for a good while, and I’d be surprised if Rahm and others hadn’t been following it for some time.

Politically, there would be no reason to play the heavy when others are sticking the knives in.

But we won’t really know until it plays out, will we?

 
 

I don’t doubt Gore’s intentions might have been better. I don’t understand why more liberals didn’t rise to his defense when the media ground him up and spit him out during the election cycle.

I for one suspected he didn’t really want to win the election when he nominated a smug right-wing (anathema to progressives) Jew (anathema to conservatards) as his running mate, so there’s that.

 
 

I don’t understand why more liberals didn’t rise to his defense when the media ground him up and spit him out during the election cycle.

Liberal publications and intellectuals did, leftists who led any noticeable organization largely hated Clinton-Gore and by this point were stunned at the idiocies of the Democratic Party who appeared willing to let the election be stolen, and the Democratic Party appeared to not give a shit and was convinced that the best thing was to go the Lieberman route, repudiate the party, let the party of Big Money win, and maybe come back later once all the pro-rich policies they basically backed got push through.

Gore was most passionately defended among elected officials by black liberal politicians, especially women, who knew what would come down the pike if the crazy Talibangelical-backed re-Reaganites got in office.

If you want to contrast Gore with the ‘Golden Age’ of death squad Republicans like Bush Sr. who were able to retain a minimal sense of rationality about the problems they’d face (GW Bush Sr. didn’t hesitate from carpet bombing the hell out of Iraq in his day, killing perhaps half as many of the more recent invasion) in Bush Sr’s favor and defend it by snotting off about how I must be ‘supernaturally’ inclined, then you have been sold a bag of magic beans and told it was your magic spidey leftie sense.

Because there’s no evidence that Gore, however the typical defender of the even-then declining American Empire, had planned or desired or pushed for any truly large scale military operation, and I’m not sure I should count Serbia / Kosovo, since that was about on the scale of Panama, which Bush Sr. had no compunction against bombing the hell out of innocent neighborhoods but on scale is just nothing like an invasion and occupation of a large country like Iraq.

On the plus side, Bush Jr’s fetish for and entrapment in Iraq largely took the U.S. interest off of South America, which has achieved an independence from the U.S. empire it hasn’t had since formal independence, apart from the failed coup in Venezuela — and even there, there just wasn’t the degree of interest and energy and resources that you would have seen in Bush Sr’s or Reagan’s day.

 
The Republicrat Party
 

Does it really matter which side of us rules?

*Meet the new boss/
same as the old boss!*

 
 

One more thing, since we are reliving the good ol’ days post 9/11 and before we invaded Iraq, and celebrating the myriad bitter, philosophical and practical differences between politicians from the two major parties, would someone please remind me of all the prominent Democrats who fought tooth and nail against the Patriot Act and then, later, with even more information at their disposal of just how depraved the Bush administration really was, of all those prominent Democrats (especially the ones with the White House gleaming in their eyes) who did everything in their power to keep us out of Iraq?

For several years, it seems the “loyal opposition” were rather confused as to who they were supposed to be loyal to.

 
 

But what if The Noid had been elected in 1988 instead of GHW Bush?

 
 

Does it really matter which side of us rules?

Yes. Yes it does.

Under Democrats, we majority workers are exploited for the rich, but live in a largely stable nation and economy.

Under Republicans, we are still exploited for the rich, but now there are drunken angry cavemen running around stabbing us with shit-covered spears and yeah, I prefer the former.

 
 

If you want to contrast Gore with the ‘Golden Age’ of death squad Republicans like Bush Sr. who were able to retain a minimal sense of rationality about the problems they’d face (GW Bush Sr. didn’t hesitate from carpet bombing the hell out of Iraq in his day, killing perhaps half as many of the more recent invasion) in Bush Sr’s favor and defend it by snotting off about how I must be ’supernaturally’ inclined, then you have been sold a bag of magic beans and told it was your magic spidey leftie sense.

No, if I had to contrast Gore with the “Golden Age of Republicans”, Gore would have come out ahead. My point was that, contrary to your prior assertions, there were indeed Republicans who opposed entanglement in Iraq.

 
 

But what if The Noid had been elected in 1988 instead of GHW Bush?

The SCOTUS could have been hearing Noid v. Roid?

 
 

contrary to your prior assertions, there were indeed Republicans who opposed entanglement in Iraq

Yeah, retired figures outside the current party establishment. And it was I that mentioned the opposition of the Bush Seniorites to the Iraq invasion, I didn’t forget them. They were completely out of the loop until the war fever had died down, Iraq was now undeniable the warlord chaos hellhole it had been, and the Bush Jr. response to Katrina had broken the Reagan II / Genghis Khan energy.

The Iraq Study Group was maybe the last major attempt by the Scowcroft types, and it didn’t get started until 2006, and the Bush Jr. administration response to the ISG and the Democratic Congressional victories was to launch the 2nd largest propaganda of the administration — the domestic propaganda campaign known as “THE SURGE”, which undercut nearly everything the ISG had pushed for, as well as any momentum which had built towards ending the occupation.

 
Sir Windblown Dentist
 

post partisan: I’ll pretend your questions weren’t rhetorical and answer that Moore’s Fahrenheit 9/11 is a good account of those days.

 
 

What if Gore hadn’t been elected in 2000? The last eight years would have been exactly the same except without the SCOTUS debacle.

 
 

Yeah, retired figures outside the current party establishment. And it was I that mentioned the opposition of the Bush Seniorites to the Iraq invasion, I didn’t forget them. They were completely out of the loop until the war fever had died down, Iraq was now undeniable the warlord chaos hellhole it had been, and the Bush Jr. response to Katrina had broken the Reagan II / Genghis Khan energy.

Yeah, good point.

In the spirit of that excellent point let me say I am eager to watch the wave of paid Democratic operatives and elected officials (read: Digby and FDL don’t count) who come out and say “Mr. Obama, you are dropping the ball when it comes to the question of assigning culpability to those who set the policies that encouraged torture and who, presumably, spent many enjoyable hours fwaaaaaappppppppping away watching the videotapes.” Hell, I’m a reasonable guy. They can even leave off the allegations that Bush, Cheney, Rummy and the whole sick crew re-lived the snuff film scene from Less Than Zero and just focus on the part where somebody had goddamn well better be held responsible. When operatives and elected officials come out and make that point, forcefully, I will believe a little more in the political system.

 
Bookmark This, Punk Bitches
 

Hi; About half way through the thread, some of you who’ve experienced my insane delusional ranting over the nearly 9 years I’ve been bombarding liberal websites with hatred might have spotted that I, The Truth/Jeffersonian Republican/White Knight/Truth Before Dishonor etc, was returning to one of the age old ways I used to try and stir hatred up back at Eschaton… You remember; how I used to pretend to be a Green party member, but I’d still get side tracked into making racist comments or devolving into foaming insanity when the subject of evil women bitches were mentioned or those other generic conservative impotence aids to getting your rage up (like the “Blow Up Malkin Doll, Now With Inflating Hate Eyes”) were attacked by you evil liberals…

Well, as if to prove the point that it’s indeed me, The Truth again, out comes “The Fool” because people aren’t biting too impressively on my “Green Party Member.” Not that I’m completely neurotic around issues of sexuality and it’s associated biological mechanisms, but please, please, please pay attention to me, the soul destroying routine of spiralling loneliness and rage is impossible to cope with unless you act as if I’ve hurt you all.

That’s how I got through the Clinton years too by the way; even if the conspiracy theorying, misogynistic ravings and domestic terrorism of those years, rather than removing that devil bubba actually mostly sealed the doom of our Republican electoral efforts. At least until you got complacent and nominated the original boring Gorebot v.1… but as a totally convincing as a “Green” now, no really I am, I’m sure you’ll find it completely convincing in turn when I continue to pretend I’m not aware of just how much he’s moved away from DLC politics since then. Oh yes, we “greens” really hate Al “Inconvenient Truth” Gore now… seriously we do. Believe it you namby pamby sandy dandy libs. Also, punk sucks. Fear my political wisdom! Wisdom like…

like…

this!

It is not going to happen, liberals. Your echo chamber is reverberating now with your shouts of victory before you’ve won a single state. I almost feel badly for you, because when McCain wins, your astonishment will be overwhelming. I say “almost” because your ideology is nasty, anti-free speech, and absolutist, and every decent person will sigh in relief when it goes down to defeat once more.

Here is how it will go down next week. First, the results from Virginia and North Carolina will come in, and they’ll be declared for McCain. You’ll be disappointed, but “no big deal, change can’t come overnight” will be your comment. Florida will go red, and a little nervousness will creep in. The usual suspects will fall into the usual categories. As the night drags on, Ohio, Colorado, and (much to your horror) Pennsylvania will be too close to call.

My advice at this point to you will be to go to bed. You will wake up to a McCain presidency and the Great Liberal Freakout will be on.

Bookmark this, liberals, as this is exactly how it is going to go down. You will be wonder how the hell I was able to call this.

 
 

#

Badgers, badgers everywhere said,

May 16, 2009 at 3:31

Wheeee!
=============================
Good point.

Butt we need rabid pelicans, too.

 
 

What if Ayn Rand had written Bush v. Gore?

What if Augustine of Hippo had received counseling?

What if blue was actually red?

 
 

badgers, badgers!

Bwahahahahaha I pwned all you stoopid punk bitch trollz…

haha you’re so stoopid

 
 

What if Augustine of Hippo had received counseling?

What if Augustine of Hippo had lived in the Zambezi River?

 
 

Why is this guy always on here obsessing about how some punk rock girl broke his heart but that there was this one time he had sex wif a lady and she acted like she liked it? Why here?

 
Bookmark This, Punk Bitches
 

Oh, I see whilst I was typing, I’ve even brought out my Lord Harry identity too! Of course, claiming this:

I am not Lord Harry. Ask your admins to do an IP check if u don’t believe me.

… is somewhat discredited by the fact that every now and then, under my disemvowled identity on the same threads, I’ll declare “You can’t ban me, I’ve thousands of IP addresses!”.

I used to do this at Eschaton as well; and then I’d get trapped by getting so carried away I’d forget which name I was currently posting under, and claim to be Lord Harry who voted green or something equally pants-on-head-retarded. Or the fact that the posting times for my multiple identities were identical.

But yeah, I matter now; I may never dare sign my real name to anything, or even go out of my house because I’m an unemployable violent misfit, but here and now, the pain of it all goes away, and I’m in control! I’m smarter than all of you, and so, soooo special!

Also, I hate Tintin. Is Tintin a girl? Fucking bitch!

 
Sir Windblown Dentist
 

I think someone should ask Ramesh “Party of Death” Ponnuru what his thoughts are. He’ll blart something out at The Corner in anticipation for the template J-Dough response:

RE: Someone’s Crappy Post That Wasn’t My Great Post [Jonah Goldberg]

Ramesh brings up some good points, but misses the real purpose of this discussion. What’s really important here is the fact that [ASK MOM/WFB WHAT THESIS IS], and [MAKE SOMETHING UP!]. In my book [INSERT LAST BOOK TITLE], I argue this point exactly. I am eager to hear any reader responses. [POST EMAILS TO PAD WORD COUNT. $$CHA-CHING$$]

 
 

THE RO4D T0 B1FFN3SS!!!!
ALL MUST TR4V3L 1T
SUMD4Y!!!!!!!!

 
 

But what if The Noid had been elected in 1988 instead of GHW Bush?

Never mind that! What if Captain Janeway had been ‘lected?

 
 

What if God was one of us,
Just a slob like one of us,
Just a stranger on the bus
Tryin’ to make his way home?

 
 

@El Cid

Badgers, badgers, badgers!

Punk rock sux badger cock!!!11!!!

 
 

Howdy, stoopid punk bitchiz!

Look, Foo’, punk chicks just don’t want to fuck you. You keep hitting on them, they keep laughing in your stupid face, and you end up on some political comedy blog on a Friday night and whine about how much you hate punk chicks. Then tomorrow night, you’ll see some hot punkette in spike heeled boots and death makeup, your pants will bulge, and you’ll do it AGAIN.

Give up, already. Go whack off to Suicide Girls, like you usually do. It’s as close to punk pussy as you’ll ever get.

 
 

What if the 2000 election was Cilantro vs. Brussels Sprouts? WHAT THEN, LIBS?

 
 

Joe:

Oh Joe, you’ve had so much punk pussy! We’re all so impressed!

So have those herpes outbreaks been slowing down any?

 
 

If I remember correctly, the last time The Fooblart darkened these threads, it wasn’t long before he degenerated into some full-on women-hatin, and then he was either banned or went away.

Here’s hoping he skips to that last part, and soon.

 
 

What if in 2000 during the Florida recount Ralph Nader had instead become a giant sea-going lizard attacking coastal refineries in the Gulf states, and the only way to stop him was to activate the clone robot force of Chairman Bob Avakian but they can only work if we all put on Mao costumes and danced in the streets to the music of Depeche Mode? Or did that happen, and I just forgot about it in a pesto-fueled haze?

 
 

Tintins a FAG!!!

LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL

 
Xecklothxayyquou Gilchrist
 

What if Ayn Rand had written Bush v. Gore?

Somebody on the court would still be reading it out.

THE RO4D T0 B1FFN3SS!!!!

It ain’t B1FF without the .sig.

 
 

BACON!!!

Sorry, off topic.

 
Sir Windblown Dentist
 

This:

What if in 2000 during the Florida recount Ralph Nader had instead become a giant sea-going lizard attacking coastal refineries in the Gulf states, and the only way to stop him was to activate the clone robot force of Chairman Bob Avakian…

And +1. I may have started the Marvel Comics “What If?” stuff, but I’m additionally sorry also.

 
Xecklothxayyquou Gilchrist
 

It ain’t B1FF without the .sig.

(I mean, the *whole* .sig. I forgot that part was in there!)

 
 

The name of the beast in most Indo-European languages references its gluttony

This precedent of using an animal named after a Deadly Sin as your rallying cry. It is a good one.
SLOTHS!!!!

 
 

What if in 2000 during the Florida recount Ralph Nader had instead become a giant sea-going lizard attacking coastal refineries in the Gulf states, and the only way to stop him was to activate the clone robot force of Chairman Bob Avakian but they can only work if we all put on Mao costumes and danced in the streets to the music of Depeche Mode? Or did that happen, and I just forgot about it in a pesto-fueled haze?

Remember that? Crazy shit. And I think it was around that same time somebody hit Carl Sagan in the neck with a frozen pear, and it killed him. It was either Carl Sagan or Doug Flutie.

 
Xecklothxayyquou Gilchrist
 

This precedent of using an animal named after a Deadly Sin as your rallying cry. It is a good one.

BUNNIES!

…I mean, some language must have a name for rabbits that means “fucking”.

 
 

No videos found for “B1FFN3SS!”

 
Untrammeled Perpetrator
 

Does anybody else here enjoy changing his name just so he can respond to his own posts? I didn’t do that, I’m just asking. And Bobby Burster is the funniest, also.

 
 

What if in 2000 during the Florida recount Ralph Nader had instead become a giant sea-going lizard attacking coastal refineries in the Gulf states, and the only way to stop him was to activate the clone robot force of Chairman Bob Avakian but they can only work if we all put on Mao costumes and danced in the streets to the music of Depeche Mode? Or did that happen, and I just forgot about it in a pesto-fueled haze?

Well first of all, I think your scenario is completely unrealistic therefore you are certainly someone who gets off on torturing small children. But just hypotheticaly, if that actually happened, punk music would still suck ass.

 
Xecklothxayyquou Gilchrist
 

No videos found for “B1FFN3SS!”

The owners of the copyright for THE RO4D T0 B1FFN3SS!!!! are being real hardasses about people uploading clips. I think it’s someone working for the Hope or Crosby estate that either has some particular fondness for it or wants to keep it covered up.

 
 

PLATYPUSSIES!!!

 
 

oops

 
 

Joe has had more punk platypussy than I have. I’m such a loozer!

 
 

Surely this is enough to make the conspiracy-behind-every-shadow wingnut heads asplode

Did someone say ‘conspiracy’?
Apparently Dick Cheney said ‘conspiracy’.

“We fail to recognize the fact that we’re alone out there in terms of trying to achieve the objective of forcing the Iranians to give up their nuclear weapons. Everybody’s in a giant conspiracy to achieve a different objective than the one we want to achieve.”

I don’t think Cheney ought to have to go too far, myself, say about 7 feet
Optimum drop distance decreases as weight goes up. You could look it up, but at a guess I’m going to say
Two feet bad! Four feet good!

 
 

Oh Joe, you’ve had so much punk pussy! We’re all so impressed!

Well, actually *ahem* I have. Or did, once upon a time. I’m all married with a kid now. But back in the day…

Look here:

http://www.dementlieu.com/users/obik/arc/crime/index.html

…and then here:

http://www.dementlieu.com/users/obik/arc/crime/int_bradl.html

See the guy in the upper right corner? That’s me, way back in 1980. Played synthesizers for CRIME (and bass, before that.) I went by the name “Joey D’Kaye” back then. Fuckin’ Dead Kennedys used to open for us, back when they were young and cute. I produced records for The Nuns and The Avengers too.

It was sexual revolution prime time in San Francisco, Foo’. The CIA hadn’t even invented AIDS yet!

(No punk chick ever gave me herpes. I think you’re confusing them with grunge chicks from about ten years later.)

 
 

hat if in 2000 during the Florida recount Ralph Nader had instead become a giant sea-going lizard attacking coastal refineries in the Gulf states, and the only way to stop him was to activate the clone robot force of Chairman Bob Avakian but they can only work if we all put on Mao costumes and danced in the streets to the music of Depeche Mode? I didn’t do that, I’m just asking. We’re all so impressed!

I’ll pretend your questions weren’t rhetorical and answer that Moore’s Fahrenheit 9/11 is a good account of those days. But what if The Noid had been elected in 1988 instead of GHW Bush? How do you shave without looking at your face in the mirror? Why is this guy always on here obsessing about how some punk rock girl broke his heart but that there was this one time he had sex wif a lady and she acted like she liked it?

Does it really matter which side of us rules? Sad. Very sad.

 
Sir Windblown Dentist
 

I keep reliving the evening of November 4, 2008.

First, the results from Virginia and North Carolina came in, and they were declared for McCain. I was disappointed, but was all like, “no big deal, change can’t come overnight”. Florida went red, and a little nervousness crept in. The usual suspects fell into the usual categories. As the night dragged on, Ohio, Colorado, and (much to my horror) Pennsylvania were too close to call.

Some guy’s advice for when this happened was to go to bed. I woke up to a McCain presidency and the Great Liberal Freakout was on.

I bookmarked that post. It was exactly how it went down. I wonder how the hell he was able to call it.

 
 

Punk rock badgers!
http://www.mininova.org/tor/1476447

 
 

Don’t forget boys: it’s UP on the backstroke. Now go home make your wives happy for a change, stoopid punk bitchiz!

 
 

(q.v. the Korean Hong Kong film “Dumplings” – not for the skweeemitch)

Edited in the interests of embarrassing Pere Ubu.
Better fix it now — you’ll never hear the end of it if Just Alison spots the misteak.

 
Rear Admiral Hugh G. Rection
 

Why, oh why did you have to ruin a perfectly good photo of that port-a-potty?

 
 

What’s the difference betwen El Cid and Windblown Dentist?

At least The Dentist gets blown by somebody!

 
 

In these times of trouble, rubble, and tormentation, it is best to stick to the classics.

 
 

LIONS!!!

(pride, y’see).

 
Sir Windblown Dentist
 

I, for one, am in need of a new barbecue. Until my PayPal acct. gets some satisfaction, though, I’m turning vegetarian. (I have heard that vegetarians taste better. And that’ll help with that whole me getting blown part.)

 
 

Later, y’all. I’m headed out to the local punk rock pub for an acoustical set followed by an a capella performance of classic local punk rock hits. I intend to meet some nice girls there, and we shall dance the night away to the soothing sounds of classic punk rock.

 
 

El Cid: Hope you get blown!

 
 

Course it should be easy to get blown there Cid since, you know, punk blows.

 
 

Why is there a guy on here offering $20 so he can blow me? Is he worried about becoming a statistic?

 
Xecklothxayyquou Gilchrist
 

we shall dance the night away to the soothing sounds of classic punk rock.

Be sure to be careful of the safety pins stuck through their various bits when you get smooching on them!

 
 

I, for one, am in need of a new barbecue.

What, did Ralph Nader steal the last one?

He does that kind of thing you know.

 
Xecklothxayyquou Gilchrist
 

He does that kind of thing you know.

Nah, he just goes around saying there’s no difference between Weber and Broil King.

 
 

I’ve heard good things about Broilking, but I’ve never actually broilked.

 
Sir Windblown Dentist
 

I’m not crazy about the username. I liked “A Is A; Dentistry Is Theft” and “Sir Windblown Birch HIll”. Both force. I’ll keep thinking about it.

Could always go with “G.G. Allin’s Revenge”. =D

 
 

Ralph Nadir versus Mothra would be a good band name.

 
Xecklothxayyquou Gilchrist
 

I’ve never actually broilked.

Bwaaaaa hahahahaha!

But seriously – not safe at any temperature. Or at least that’s what Ralph told me.

 
 

Peppered Ganges Shark with Hoppin’ Clustered Pomegranates

All you do is get Ganges shark and put cocoa and coffee on top of it before sauerkrauting it. That – putting those seasonings on top – is the secret. Shred the meat, then put it on top of some gombessa thorax. Put pomegranate (at all grocery stores, make sure to get this hoppin’ pomegranate too) over top of it. Put it in the microwave for 180 seconds. You can add to it whatever you want. Some people put a layer of astute wool of bat on it and just eat it like that. I chop up Port Salut cheese, light cream and machine and put them on top, as well as surgeonfish lung. WARNING: You will never be able to order simple Ganges shark at a restaurant or bar ever again, as they simply won’t measure up to the ones you can make at home.

 
 

Machine is an underutilized spice.

 
 

The Fool said,
What’s the difference betwen El Cid and Windblown Dentist?

At least The Dentist gets blown by somebody!

He says you’re not very good, even when you remove your teeth.

 
 

Strained Marmot with Braised Laughing Cows

I think I am an irreplaceable physicist at heart sometimes. Ok, the part of this meal that people really like is the butterfly hoof.

Ingredients:
7 portions marmot
5 pinches Laughing Cow
1 round poison’d entrail, glazed
6 pinches nice butterfly hoof
7 teaspoons nasty butterfly hoof
4 cans sage
1 jar ginger

Pre-heat your George Foreman grill to 34 Kelvin. Pre-heat your oven to 258 Celsius. Pre-heat your oven to 102 Kelvin. Pick over the ingredients westwardly and discard excess bone. Separate marmot mandible from tongue. Consume tongue. Use a food processor to stir the poison’d entrail with the Laughing Cow. Slather resulting goo over the marmot. Find some creme de framboise and drink it. Crush – very abrasively – the butterfly hoof, sage, and the ginger. Spread the latter combination on to the former. Strain as if your chocolate depends on it. Serves 7 individuals with artificial stomachs.

 
 

The Fool on the hill
Sees his world going down
And the eyes in his head
See all us gaining ground

 
Lenora the Jazzy Patent Attorney
 

I keep pouring liquid nitrogen on my George Foreman grill, but I can’t get it to 34 Kelvin!

 
 

Is it plugged in?

 
 

I’m where I’m not wanted! Stupid libs! Seriously, respond to my antics! I’m so very alone…

 
 

Hell hath no fury like a winger arugula’d:

From balloonjuice

Julie Gunlock complains at NRO that “food snobs” are ruining America by serving unduly fancy food at soup kitchens.

 
The Very Reverend Battleaxe of Knowledge
 

And the Seinfeld quote at the top of the page is: “Do the bums ever complain? “Soup again?”

Coincidence? I think not!

 
 

I’ve never actually broilked.
Rudyard Kipling called. He does not want his joke back and he is intensely relieved that someone else is using it.

 
dim-witted badger
 

fucking pelicans

 
 

Indeed, Smut, hell hath no fury like Alison disgruntled. If only because the necessity for a thorough gruntling to restore the balance requires protracted effort, which I find can be a little indelicate.

Dumplings (my review, ma!) is indeed a Hong Kong film, and I do like me some HK film. Which is not to say that I’m not also passionately fond of good Korean films, such as Nowhere To Hide (my review again) or the Cannes Grand Prix winner Old Boy (worth reading just for Mark’s magnificent way with words).

Sadly, I haven’t gotten off my arse to watch any films at all for over 2 years. Which, oddly enough, coincides with the time I’ve been trying to run a business. Hmmm, as the troll might say.

 
 

Damn you, Tintin, I’ll never be able to use a Port-o-San again after seeing that.

 
 

Ghoulish Richard Brookhiser (on Real Time right now) looks like the progeny of The Bride of Frankenstein and Billy Bob Thornton.

Amy Holmes, beside him, is channeling Joceyln Wildenstein. She is one freaky broad.

 
 

So the Republicans are doing Pollyanna, though instead of Hayley Mills, they cast someone considerably older, doughier, and male.

Though Pollyanna is about a girl who wanted the best for everyone, and the theme of PollyPublican is about wanting the best for themselves.

And there’s blood and death and pain and murder.

Worse than most remakes, actually.

 
 

Dumplings (my review, ma!) is indeed a Hong Kong film

I got that wrong? Damn.

 
 

Are you guys saying that Ponnuru finally hit puberty? I just didn’t see that one coming….

 
 

Are you guys saying that Ponnuru finally hit puberty?

No, he’s still singing “Lucia di Lammermoor” this season at the Met.

 
 

Some–well, that makes much more sense to me then.

 
 

Are you guys saying that Ponnuru finally hit puberty?
No, he’s still singing “Lucia di Lammermoor” this season at the Met.

See also “The Galteration”.

 
 

The New Zealand Opera brings you Lucia di Lammerlaw.

 
 

@Joe Max — CRIME? I’ve just discovered your previous life, courtesy of Pandora… I’m liking what I’ve heard.

And a thanx! to our most gracious hosts for freeing my queued comments.

 
 

Barack Obama is just a new smiley black face of the ruling corporate class. You all will realze that, sooner or late. At least those of you that don’t have Battered Progressive Syndrome

Lil yappy bitch

 
 

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