Does anyone need a drink?
Posted on January 18th, 2004 by
EP Verdi, frequent Sadly, No! commentor and lover of all things Amber, emails to suggest a State of the Union Drinking Game. (Should you think this is a disturbing idea, keep in mind that his her last email to us bore the subject Amber Pawlik, bag buster, so this is a big improvement.)
To get things started he she proposes shooting back a shot of Remy [is EP the ladies’ man?!?]:
every time Saddam is mentioned with no mention of WMDs every time 9/11 is mentioned with no mention of Osama.
We would add a shot of Jagermeister:
every time Bush claims we can grow our way out of the deficits. For every proposal that is labeled “market based.”
In addition, at every mention of the word “compassionate” the last person to stand up must drink a shot of tequila.
As is always the case when we offer posts like this, readers are invited to add their own ideas in comments.
This post is dedicated to posting even after you’ve completely run out of ideas.
Double shots for “rape rooms”, “democracy” and “freedom-loving”?
Just to up the ante, so to speak.
A hit of Remy for phrase mangling. (I’m being nice: stumbling over a word doesn’t count. Making a new Bushism counts.)
Shot of Remy for the inheritance/legacy theme: waaah Clinton gave me this problem; the “death tax”; parents loving kids loving parents.
A hefty shot for thieving the Clinton-Gore Don’t Stop Thinking about Tomorrow theme, esp. paraphrased song quotes. However, if Commander Manly Boy engages in any Stevie Nicks-type twirling of the presidential skirt, ask a friend or loved one to hit you with the bottle and knock you out.
Bartender, shots for everyone …
And don’t forget: substitue a ball-peen hammer “shot” to the head for each of the drink shots, if you actually voted for this moron in 2000.
Great post – esp. Saddam/WMD and 911/Osama – and comments. I’m wondering what the voice/body language animatronic settings will be. Who can forget last year’s over-the-top vocal performance – that ominously low, soft, horror-movie-narrator voice for the ENTIRE SPEECH. It certainly convinced me that our country was in immediate physical peril from the most dangerous menace to civilization in history, Saddam Hussein.
In any case I’m expecting the most cynical lying Rovian performance yet. The junta’s capacity to outdo itself seems bottomless.
One thing about these drinking games is they can make our AA/recovering friends feel left out. Well, sober brethren – here’s one for you: don’t take a drink whenever the chimp is lying! And wake up feeling fine and clearheaded and wingnut-ass-kicking!
Btw, I could swear that the LM’s social lubricant of choice was Courvoisier?
A double for when he says that he is winning the war on terror, and fails to mention any facts.
Chug a Colt .45 Malt whenever he says “bold”
If you hear the name “Osama” it will mean that you have already passed out and you are dreaming. The Chimp made it through his last State of the Union, and his last press conference without mentioning that name.
When did Bush last say “Osama”?