I could never be a Leftist because the Left seems to hate two things that I love: men and American business.

Why do you guys hate yourselves?

I like the “if women and men are the same [by the way, no leftist really believes that, but why let that stop the wingnuts from constructing strawmen?] and men are bad, then women are bad too” attempt at a dig.

Sorry, they aren’t American businesses any more now that they all moved their “headquarters” to various tropical islands.

She forgot to put quotes on “miracles”!!!!!! Doesn’t she know that you can’t write “two” lines on the “internets” without using “quotes” to “suggest” that you “are” a “cobag”???????

I could never be a Leftist because the Left seems to hate two things that I love: men and American business.

She forgot Christmas, Jesus, and America.

And babies.

I hate bunnies and kittens too, but that’s just me.

oh, and Lamb-Ducks! ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww…

I like how her tractor analogy basically explains how evolution works.

Small incremental changes that, when looked at from across the great expanse of time, seem to be drastic impossible gaps in continuity.

The obvious difference being that when the changes aren’t randomly generated you can achieve the massive change in a hundred years rather than a hundred million.

Has she been huffing Pine-Sol fumes again?

OK, I get it. She was really blocked for this weeks column, and had to traipse along with Hubby to go to the damned Tractor Museum, instead of attending the scrapbooking retreat like she wanted to, and just couldn’t think of anything else to write about. I guess.

But isn’t it wonderful how everything, even a trip to a Tractor Museum, is another opportunity to bash liberals?

And babies.

Aw, come on, everybody on the left loves babies; they’re delicious!

Wow, men are just the bestest and most brilliantest. They are the ones that are responsible for ALL advancements and innovations, whilst we little womenfolk just trail along behind gazing adoringingly and occasionaly making admiring noises. THAT is what this beeyatch is all about. The little woman’s place.

I made a wrong turn the other day and happened upon the aforementioned tractor museum in Vista. My daughter said “cool, can we go someday Daddy?” and I said sure, I’m an engineer and interested in industrial progress and old things that make loud noises and teach history and all that.

But I forgot I hated America and men and by logical extension women and therefore girls and my daughter so I’m going to go home right now and yell at her and tell her “no goddamn way are we going to any damn American man loving steam tractor museum but if you want you can burn it down when your bring home your first longhaired socialist boyfriend after he gets you pregnant with his welfare babay in the back of his Yugo”.

Because that’s what we leftists do, you know.

Holy shit.. that woman’s face alone would make me turn gay. If she really wants to encourage breeder marriage she ought to get some plastic surgery. Otherwise, she will always lose out to a hairy ass. (and I’m not even gay, not that there’s anything wrong with that)

Holy Ayn Rand! She is freakin’ jenius!

I mean, how did she know I was gonna go to that there “tractor show” but on my way to vote for Stalin, I had to kick a man in the “crotch” and burn down “a” Starbucks.