Livin La Vida Pawlik

The last few days, we must concede, have been very difficult here at Sadly, No! International. It’s not because we were in the hospital. (The hospital! What is it?) And it’s not because Ayn Randian Princess Amber Pawlik never replied to our email. If only she kept writing something, Amber’s email silence would be tolerable. Sadly, the Amber Canon? has not grown of late, and we find ourselves adrift. There’s just no denying that Amber’s absence leaves a void — and we have to fill that void.

But how will you do it you ask? Well, we had to think about it for a while. Fortunately, we soon came to see how one could lead his (or her, this brilliant plan does not discriminate on the basis of sex!) entire life the Pawlik way. Hence we offer Livin La Vida Pawlik:

  • The first thing we need is some time off, and what better place to enjoy a few days of relaxation than Haus Pawlik? We’re not sure how many stars it has, but according to Altavista it offers: “Experience elevated hospitality and spend you your well-deserved vacation in relaxed and saved atmosphere.” Would you expect your vacation to offer anything more?
  • But all play and no work makes Sadly, No! a poor boy. And so we head over to Pawlik Sales Consultants where we find a job opening that sounds just right for us: “The successful growth politics the medium-size and independent energy service providers is in the next years to be consistently resumed, the self-sufficiency retained. In the course a new occupation look for we an experienced guidance personality.” Experienced guidance personality you say? Have we got some guidance for you!
  • But with all this work, will there be time to help humanity in its quest for better living? Our efforts to make the world a better place also need attention. Ah, what have we here? The Pawlik Lab offers “Better Living Through Chemical Ecology.” Oh thank you — what can we do to help?
  • Having invested so much of our emotional life in Amber Pawlik, we must nevertheless face the harsh reality that our feelings may not be mutual. (Someone hand us a tissue please!) What shall we do then? Perhaps we shall turn to Sabine Pawlik instead?
  • Our new job as a guidance personality leaves us with much disposable income (just like those lucky duckies illegal immigrants we read about in The Corner.) Where can we satisfy our needs for the latest transistors and diodes? Could there be a better place than Pawlik Elektronik? We think not!
  • Finding ways to relax is not easy in this dog eat cock dog world, but according to Sport Pawlik all we need is “speed, strength & power.” Check!
  • And so begins our new life — we feel better already!



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