I tried to be good today, honest.

Poll Numbers, Gas Prices & Discounts

Dear Sal Leno,

Falling poll numbers. Rising gas prices. Gloating Democrats. For a conservative, it’s enough to make autumn the season of discontent. But it should not be so–and as the leaves turn colors, and hearts turn to thoughts of romance, there has never been a better time to offer you a discount to Conservative Match. Join our message forums and engage the battle. Help buck up your fellow conservative…and maybe just meet your future spouse along the way.

This is one of the most active conservative communities on the Internet, and where else can you find so many conservative singles all in one place!!!

We want you to become a full member of our conservative community. We are offering you a $20.00 discount off a 12-month membership. That means it costs you roughly four dollars a month to become part of the largest community of single conservatives in the world.

For about $4.00 a month you will be able to contact others through private email and instant messenger. You will also have the opportunity to join in the discussions of our community rooms. You may even meet your future spouse or a new friend today!

Would this be too mean? After all, we have our souls to consider.


Comments: 22


Wait… did you write that letter???


I actually joined this site, under the guise of a psychotically racist and murdererous republican just to see the pictures in the profile (and shake things up a bit, see what hot responses I could get.)

Although it was free when I joined, maybe i’m thinking of that other conservitave singles site… At any rate, theres some real winners on there. Some of them even have most of their teeth left.


Souls are nothing more than the attempt of the uniformed and ignorant to make sense of the silly res cogitans/res extensa distinction formalized by Descartes, but which has obvious antecedents in Plato’s simile of the line.

Embrace John Searle or Dan Dennett, reject the soul, and indulge your inner evil.

In short: do it!


i will HAPPILY donate the first $4.


What would Bluto do? “Go-go-go-go!”


Too mean? It’s a moral imperative!


Although beware if you run across a “brunette beauty with a weakness for grammar* and turtleneck sweaters.”

* Sorry, that should be “weakness of grammar.”


I would have never thought to open an ad for a dating site with a line about rising gas prices.


do it do it do it do it do it do it do it do it do it do it do it do it do it do it do it do it do it do it do it do it do it do it do it do it do it do it do it do it do it do it do it do it do it do it do it do it do it do it do it do it do it do it do it do it do it


Help buck up your fellow conservative…and maybe just meet your future spouse along the way.

Damned typos! Let’s see, how can we fix this?

Help fuck up your fellow conservative…and maybe just meet your future spouse along the way.

Aah. Much better!


‘Guilty of Being White’ is a song, orginally done by Minor Threat but more famous for the Slayer version. Typical shithead racist metal song…
(fwiw – small percentage of metal is racist, by no means a theme throughout the genre)


Crap – that comment was meant for the Malkin thread. How the hell did I get here? I’m old and confused, do you know where I live?


I don’t think either Minor Threat or Slayer are racist. ‘Guilty of Being White’ itself is used as a racist song though, which is just retarded.

Minor Threat’s singer grew up in a mostly black neighborhood where he got beat up for being white. That’s where the song comes from. When they were starting out though, they regularly performed with African American reggae-punk band Bad Brains.

They’ve written songs against racism, cops, flags, pollution, date rape, drugs, alcohol, the treatment of native americans, U.S. foreign policy, etc., etc.

Both Mt and Slayer have done tours with bands from all over the world.


As a side note, are there any expressly liberal personal sites? We keep hearing about OMG teh librul personal sites are discriminating against me because no one on there wants to date a conservative wackjob! but I don’t know if there are really any true liberal dating sites (nerve.com doesn’t count; maybe The Onion personals count).



the uniformed and ignorant

Why do you hate our troops?


I caught that five minutes after I hit “post”.

It’s obviously subliminable proof that I am with the terrorists. Death’s too good for me. 😀


Would this be too mean?

No…but here’s how you should do it: Sign up as a WOMAN. I mean, you know it’s a sausage party over there, and this way you can have these dudes going all alpha-male on each other trying to show who’s the wingnuttiest.

On the other hand, if you could woo Marie J … but I digress.


Marue Jon is only accessible FROM THE RIGHT, read any kabbalah text ad you will comprehend this erotic sex secret of the sages.


I am totally picturing a You’ve Got Mail moment where you actually develop an internet relationship between your conservative persona and a young female conservative. Then it turns out she is a liberal pretending too!!

Nora Ephron watch out!


I will happily donate the second 4 bucks.


My spelling is defective but my aim is tru


Why would anyone want to date folks who advocate celibacy till marriage? You’re not gonna get much nookie from those cookies, even if you find one who’s not a visual turn-off.

Singles dating clubs are for finding sex partners, and the wingnuts proclaim that celibacy and chastity and purity are their goals. Logical contradiction here, it looks like to me.

Sort of like “Christian Loan Sharks” (whose spam I get every third day or so), in the words of Robbie, the Robot: “It does not compute! It does not compute! It does not compute!”

Or are they just hypocrits? We report, your decide.



(comments are closed)