Shorter Doughy Pantload
Above: Totally knows you’re out to get him.
- “The Paranoid Style” is an ancient and vicious smear on the right wing, concocted by a liberal fascist conspiracy of intellectuals like Hofstadter and Adorno, whose nefarious works I know like the back of my Cheeto-stained han–mmmm, Cheetos.
‘Shorter’ concept created by Daniel Davies and perfected by Elton Beard. We are aware of all Internet traditions.™
Gavin adds:
Naomi Klein, Noam Chomsky, the folks at ANSWER, Ward Churchill, are no less conspiratorial than your typical right-wing conspiracy theorist and some of them are not only worse, but far more accepted by the liberal establishment than their opposite numbers are by the conservative establishment.
Mr. Goldberg, meet Andrew McCarthy:
What is the deal with Obama’s birth certificate and citizenship status?
Pamela Gellers at Atlas Shrugs raises some apparent shenanigans with the birth certificate the Obama campaign previously produced. Meanwhile, Philip J. Berg, a former Deputy AG of Pennsylvania and a professed Hillary supporter, filed a lawsuit claiming Obama is not constitutionally eligible to be president; instead of simply clearing up any questions — which you would think would take about five minutes — Obama’s lawyers moved to dismiss the suit and failed to file a timely answer, meaning that, under the applicable rules (according to Berg), Obama is legally deemed to have admitted Berg’s allegations that he is constitutionally ineligible to be president.
Besides his gigs at The National Review and Commentary, Mr. McCarthy is a senior fellow at the Foundation for the Defense of Democracies.
Even shorter Pantload:
Lifts left buttock. Breaks wind. Smiles.
Wait…are you sure this wasn’t written by K.Lo?
Where were these people for the last eight years when abject paranoid hysteria consumed the left flank of liberalism and threatened to capsize the entire enterprise?
Projection, thy name is Wingnut.
Where were these people for the last eight years …
i.e., 1993-2001.
I stand corrected, Xecky. Everyone knows we went straight from Teh Clenis to Blacky X Hussein.
… conservatives complain that liberals want to Europeanize American social policy…
Who needs Sweden when we already have Mississippi, Alabama, etc.?
(Formerly Lurkbot: going by my Unitarian Jihadi name.)
Plus “Viereck” means “square,” so there!
Convoluted, projectionist drivel, thy name is Goldberg.
BTW, didn’t his mother use to blow LBJ, back in the Oval Office?
This was wrong, btw. I noted in a previous post that Viereck had invented the term ‘pseudoconservative’ (previously attributed to Hofstadter via Adorno), and misread what Goldberg was claiming. It was only up for like 5-10 minutes, so I called a mulligan.
Actually, I’m still not sure what Jonah was claiming. That Hofstadter just copied Adorno?
Perhaps Hofstadter should have used a different term to describe the cognitive / rhetorical pattern he had identified, so as to make it clear that he wasn’t talking about already-recognised phenomena like “conspiracy theorising” or “questioning received opinion”. That would have saved Mr Goldberg from confusion. He could have called it, I don’t know, “the paranoid style” or something like that.
Not to keep quoting this particular fart in Jonah’s thought bathwater, but…
“Where were these people for the last eight years when abject paranoid hysteria consumed the left flank of liberalism and threatened to capsize the entire enterprise?”
Er, voting out Republicans across the country and claiming the Presidency to the tune of 69 million-plus votes. That’s where we’ve been, Mr. Staypuff.
Das Laden Pants:
Yes, Jonah, “the whole enterprise” was threatened to the point where Republicans lost congress and then, two years later, couldn’t beat an inexperienced African-American with a funny name, even though the rabid flank of your party, (i.e, you) made him out to be a radical socialist. FYYFFF.
And of course, there is no more ironically named organization than the Foundation for the Defense of Democracies, where the slogan is “Defending Democracy, One Clusterbomb At A Time.”
Christ, are these people STILL on about Obama being born in a mud hut in Zimbabwe, after being sires by Lenin and Viet Cong supply officer named Helga?
“instead of simply clearing up any questions — which you would think would take about five minutes”
Yeah, you’d THINK that, wouldn’t you? And yet, here we are…
Maybe the Obama campaign had better things to do with their time then answer every crackpot who claimed that Obama molested them, or that Obama was selling state secrets to the Kangaroos.
Obama’s lawyers moved to dismiss the suit and failed to file a timely answer, meaning that, under the applicable rules (according to Berg), Obama is legally deemed to have admitted Berg’s allegations that he is constitutionally ineligible to be president.
I filed a brief in the county court claiming that Andrew McCarthy likes to fart in paper bags and then smell it. Because his lawyers failed to file a timely reply, he is legally deemed to have admitted to liking to fart in paper bags and then smelling it.
Logic, I has it.
Ward fucking Churchill? They’re still on him? Seriously?
GET SOME NEW MATERIAL.
mr. goldberg>>
hello. i just got off the phone helping a friend who’s gone back to school after many years find his way around the academic search premier database. while i make no special claims to being anything more than an adequate researcher, i would be happy to provide similar services in utilizing the google search engine, which i happen to have on good authority is somewhat easier to use and probably more befitting your needs, which i have to assume is something like journalism. or something like it. wow, yeah – what is it you do, anyway?
hoping to hear from you soon!
>>dex
They can’t. They’re perpetually stuck on dumb.
Unless by “new” you mean, “Mumia” or “HueyNewton” or all the other alleged bogeymen of the left these people have trotted out over the years.
Oh fer chrissakes (h/t chris),
Goldberg was on C-SPAN this weekend saying how the Right was the always-thinking, always-debating side and the Left all marched in ideological lock-step. The Right was engaged in “a long, ongoing debate over the proper line between order and liberty.”
F– you, you overemployed welfare recipient. Way back in 2005 and 2006, your “long debate about the proper line between order and liberty” had you all, spontaneously, suddenly agree, yup, “torture is teh awesome! 24! bang! bang! Habeas corpus? More like dead corpus! hahahaha….wolverines!”
F— off.
cf. the Basset Hawker.
Thanks to Gavin for showing us the extra special bonus stupid which is the modern wingnut:
Obama’s lawyers moved to dismiss the suit and failed to file a timely answer…
What part of ‘no’ did Berg not understand? A motion to dismiss is the most negative possible response.
… meaning that, under the applicable rules (according to Berg), Obama is legally deemed to have admitted Berg’s allegations…
Berg actually received payment for the practice of law in (and by) and American state, but still expects anyone to believe his drivel? WTF does Berg think “motion to dismiss” means, anyway? He’s in the desperate “acquittal does not prove innocence” and “absence of evidence is not evidence of absence” territory with this sophistry.
I want to see the vault copy of Berg’s law degree.
Why is McCarthy championing a supporter of Vince Foster-murdering Hillary Clinton, who is likely an accessory after the fact?
threatened to capsize the entire enterprise.
You can tell that the prospect of a Star Trek remake is already intruding on Mr Goldberg’s thoughts.
Fixed.
Obama’s birth certificate was originally in the vault, but Geraldo’s scheming minions secretly spirited it away prior to that faked dramatic public unveiling. The other mukluk will drop when Palin declares for ’12, whereupon the midnight sun of Truth will finally shine its beams of politcal beatitude for all Real Americans to bask in…
Oh crap — I’ve forgotten where I’m commenting. 7-11 is running a special on Steel Reserve this week.
The “We’ve all got weirdo’s” shtick might be a leetle bit more convincing if there hadn’t been those 8 years of “We’re the bestest that there evah was”. He is trying to reposition himself just in case the stimulus works.
I like the mentioning of some guys that William F. Buckley told him about over Hot Dogs sometime.
Is Obama both a socialist AND a fascist?
How does “Liberal Commie-Nazi” sound?
Ward fucking Churchill? They’re still on him? Seriously?
GET SOME NEW MATERIAL.
Bill Ayers! Bernadine Dohrn!
No, wait, we tried that one, didn’t work either…um…
I got nothing.
teleprompter!
Jonah sent me an email when I questioned his defense of Peretz’s racism.
Here’s my email to the weewhale:
>blockquote>
On Sun, Mar 29, 2009 at 5:56 AM, Joseph Sampson wrote:
Two words, Jonah: “congenital corruption”.
congenital. that would mean “by nature”. So, to sum up; Peretz used the phrase “congenital corruption” or, in other words, latinos are born corrupt.
That’s racist.
It’s no surprise that you would defend this. Being a congenital liar. Born of a liar to become one.
You’re a putz.
You do know what that word means, right?
Here’s his response to me:
Here’s the link to his post that was inspired by my correspondence.
Here’s a snippet:
Shorter Jonah:
Latin American countries are incapable of running their own affairs from birth. Oh, and it’s racist to point out that congenital corruption in the GOP is racist.
Another strawman from the Butt-Paste Bozo.
It should be noted that Mr. Pantload’s entire conception of Latin America comes from singing along with the Frito Bandito while enjoying bag after bag of crunchy corn snacks.
Because he’s more afraid of a black pee-pee than a white va-jay-jay.
Is Obama both a socialist AND a fascist?
It’s Goldberg. All the socialists are fascists and all the fascists are socialists. He acknowledges the existence of only two political types: People who agree with him and Fascists.
In fact, that is central to his point.
Does anyone really think corruption in Latin American countries isn’t firmly established by habit?
Of course, by this he means the totally evil ‘nationalizing the oil company’ type of corruption, not the perfectly benevolent, hunky-dory ‘US-backed nun-raping death squads’ type of corruption.
March 31, 2009 at 11:34
As Fudgie once again proves about conservatives, it’s far more indecorous to be called a racist than to, you know, actually be one.
…not the perfectly benevolent, hunky-dory ‘US-backed nun-raping death squads’ type of corruption.
Well that’s because nun-raping death squads are for the Defense of Democracies. And FREEDOM!
Of course, by this he means the totally evil ‘nationalizing the oil company’ type of corruption, not the perfectly benevolent, hunky-dory ‘US-backed nun-raping death squads’ type of corruption.
Right. What with at least one major political party committing major fraud at every turn, at least in their eyes, the USA would not seem to be a glowing example of corruption-free politics either. And that’s not even considering the ACTUAL bullshit that goes on.
In that picture, J.G. bears an eerie resemblance to the singer from Harvey Danger. It makes me want to follow him around yelling “PLAY PRIVATE HELICOPTER!” Which makes him way cooler than Ezra Klein.
Chalk up another person flabbergasted by Where were these people for the last eight years when abject paranoid hysteria consumed the left flank of liberalism Abject paranoid hysteria? Holy fucking fuck. The US government assumed huge new powers to itself to listen to private calls without getting a warrant, demand libraries turn over all your data (also with no warrant) AND forbid librarians from telling anyone, ignore laws even as they signed them as well as long-standing laws and treaties, torture people to death, hold US citizens virtually indefinitely without bringing ANY charge against them, all of these and more were widely reported, known, accepted, and even defended by these motherfuckers, but the fact that leftists were proved fucking right every time they said the Bush administration was engaging in outrageously unconstitutional activity shows abject paranoid hysteria? Jesus. If there were a God, Doughy’s tongue would swell to the size of a melon, burst, and rot in his empty fucking head.
“typical right-wing conspiracy theorist”
Okay, I’ll take a stab at this.
A TRWCT is someone who believes: Hussein X is going to legalize child sex, bestiality and gayness; he will also criminalize religious worship and silence Rush via the fairness doctrine; Bill Ayers is negotiating an alliance with Bin Laden and the Ayatollahs and the North Koreans and Cubans where we give everyone nucular secrets for free by outsourcing it to the Chi-coms who will also set up a reserve currency and with Russia steal Alaskan oil and Sarah Palin. Also there’s the NAFTA superhighway and controlling everyone’s healthcare and hating Israel mainly because he is a secret Mooslim from Africa.
Oh look, I just descibed Joe the Plumber.
As lead guitarist for Hofstadter-Adorno, I take offense at this blatant intellectual property infringement.
I should have said “That makes him Better than Ezra Klein”.
I bet there were a hell of a lot more prominent Republicans who pushed the Vince Foster-Ron Brown was shot in a plane crash-Clinton Death List BS than there were prominent Democrats who pushed the 9-11wasaninsidejobtheyblewuptheNewOrleansDikestodorwnbrownpeople BS. The one Democratic member of Congress who was even borderline twoofer was Cynthia McKinney, who was ousted in a primary. Will any of the Repukes who are pushing the birth certificate nonsense lose their seats in a primary? Doubtful, VERY doubtful.
Once again if Jonah says “A’ the safest wager is on “B.”
How could we have been paranoid about Bush, when it became clear he was even worse than we thought? The Justice Dept. actually did issue an opinion that Bush could send the military into private homes of Americans if he thought it necessary.
to be fair it was NOT just twooferism that cost McKinney her seat but over-all nuttiness, which included but was not limited to twooferism.
I love my new Unitarian jihadi name. Thanks, The Very Reverend Battleaxe of Knowledge!
I just have a hard time listening to liberals grow suddenly high-brow and Ivy League serious about the paranoid style of the American Right.
“Suddenly”? “Suddenly“? We’re the ELITISTS, Dough-Load, and always have been, remember?
Heh. Indeed. Jonah wasn’t exactly too friendly the one time I’ve e-mailed him. Tea parties! Read the whole thing.
Slightly OT, but can’t wingnut revisionism be countered with the wayback machine?
Teh Pantload is *rolling* in that picture.
Ecstasy, baby! It’s the new cocaine!
BTW, didn’t his mother use to blow LBJ
That’s why they called him El BJ!
JKP, Esquire, ya think? Looks to me a big snootful of amyl nitrate just starting to kick in.
I cannot read any more piffle by ths fat fucking moron. I’m in Pantload Overload already.
A Pantslosion, eh?
I linked over to the Foundation for the Defense of Democracies page and Oh My God!!!! That is the murderers row of reichtwingnuttia! I think they’ve formed this group, F for the D of D, so as to further the now tarnished goals of the PNAC…world domination for crazy right wing illuminatti.
That or they’re building up their legal defense fund for the day they are all standing before Judges in the Hauge charged with Crimes Against Humanity.
Color Me Paranoid: I remember back in 2001-2002 when the left was first comparing Bush to Nixon & thinking to myself he was a hell of a lot nastier – oh, how I wish I’d been wrong.
The guy who raped Habeas Corpus, made “waterboarding” into a meme, & brought Nixon’s then-unworkable Surveillance State fantasies to life almost defied the ability to BE paranoid with the sheer scope & scale of his ugliness … & America now seems intent on going in for the same instant amnesia that it came down with post-Nixon – a comfort-bubble of folly which earned it the paragon of extremist idiocy that was Ronald “Deficits Are Vitamins & Ketchup Is A Vegetable” Reagan, a mere six years later.
Those who forget the past are condemned to eat it raw.
If by “habit” he means “centuries of colonial kleptocracy, followed by decades of heavy-handed World Bank & State Department/CIA intervention” then sure, sure it is.
O, God. I just took a look at the members of the Foundation for the Defense of Democracies. It should be called the Foundation of the Eighth Circle of Hell.*
*where Dante consigned fatterers, hypocrites and fraudulent advisors.
As Fudgie once again proves about conservatives, it’s far more indecorous to be called a racist than to, you know, actually be one.
Mark Noonan would like to inform you that there’s no such thing as a racist conservative:
“fatterers”? Uh-oh.
Klein and Chomsky morphed into Dohrn and Ayers, and Ward Churchill into Rev. Wright, because they’re really all killer liquid metal cyborg assassins from the far-flung future of 1997. OK, that’s my pop culture reference for today, time to lock the office door, break out the hand lotion, and try that World of Warcraft hack that makes the female night elves and draenei look like they’re starkers. — JG.
“Why do the Tim McVeigh types count against the Right, but the Black Panthers never against the Left? ”
uh, because the panthers didn’t blow up a building and murder hundreds of innocent people?
When did scary negro brandishing a weapon while defending his community = mass murderer?
What an eff’ing pant load indeed.
Yes, Naomi Klein’s thoroughly researched, heavily footnoted work is the raving of a paranoiac, while the sub-Bircher, anonymous e-mail from Wingnut Central is carefully-considered, responsible citizen-journalism.
Indeed.
The concept that conservatives are racists is a figment of liberal imagination
Wow! First there’s no such thing as a rightie troll, now this.
Er, voting out Republicans across the country and claiming the Presidency to the tune of 69 million-plus votes. That’s where we’ve been, Mr. Staypuff.
FTW.
Joeyess: My sincere sympathy. Having your intelligent, documented point twisted by the doughboy and made into “column” fodder must be ulcer-creating.
“Does anyone really think corruption in Latin American countries isn’t firmly established by habit?”
So, Jonah, what’s your take on the endless vile corruption of good old U.S.A.? Genetic predisposition, or is it learned at (ug!) Mommy’s breast? Or was corruption “Thrust upon us” by circumstances, such as, ummmm….creating the most horrible killing weapon ever?
Jonah irritates me more than any other wingnut-pundit. Maybe because his stupidity and phoniness is written SO LARGE on his large face. His large ugly face. Is it that smug smile, that ability (inherited or learned) to twist anything said to him to support his so-called opinion? (Dictionary: “a view or judgment formed about something, not necessarily based on fact or knowledge”). Is it the obvious fact he’s never missed a meal (5 meals a day, rain or shine) nor endured any hardship?
He’s like those bobbley-wobbley blow up clowns, weighted on the bottom (ha!) that bounce back into your face when you knock them down. A sharp implement is the only solution.
Mike -somebody- comes in 2nd on my list of hated Wingnuts, tho I don’t think he really influences anyone. You know, he’s the one who obviously loathes and fears all women. Of course one could say that about all wingnuts, even the women.
Mike Adams, that’s his name.
“But I think most of the rhetoric has been perfectly legitimate given the times we’re in and what Obama is trying to do. In particular, as I noted the other day, I love how liberals — who have been pushing to Europeanize American social policy for generations — are suddenly aghast and contemptuous when conservatives complain that liberals want to Europeanize American social policy, just as the liberal effort starts to succeed.”
This is exactly and specifically an example of “The Paranoid Style” as described by Hofstadter. There is apparently no bottom to conservative American lack of introspection – they just keep falling and falling and falling into a bottomless pit of dishonesty and stupidity.
They are incapable of learning or understanding anything of substance.
Here’s a silly question: Why the hell are we still hearing the name Ward Churchill? Here’s the deal on Churchill: He had a good point on the “little Eichmanns” comment, but it was sufficiently obscure that it went over everyone’s head. When someone got offended, it turned out he was a shitty researcher who lied about his ancestry. Most liberals had never heard of him, no one thought he was worth defending, and he’s been Piltdowned. Yet some conservatives continue to treat him as some sort of guru.
As for Latin American corruption… tis the nature of postcolonial governments. The puppet regimes go away and are eaten by the jackals. When the jackals rule, everyone suffers.
Simple Answers to Simple Questions bait:
Goldberg doesn’t know shit about shit, does he?
He debates with the usual weasel debate tactic of claiming that an intellectual point is invalidated because it is “flawed” but refuses even to explain why it is flawed, let alone what methodology he used for determining its fallacy.
I don’t think Goldberg ever cracked a volume of Adorno in his life.
PIPgMF