Komrade Kaye Kommands That We Kreate Price Kontrols!

Further showing that she’s the most ideologically incoherent conservative pundit on the planet, Comrade Kaye Grogan has now come out in favor of… price controls! Behold:

Gas gouging…creating piggy bank era

Kaye Grogan
October 7, 2005

Even during hard times some industries are of the notion that they still have the right to make huge profits, irregardless of the state of the economy or the burden it is causing consumers to endure.

That tends to be what industries do, Kaye. And unless American law has drastically changed within the last hour, companies actually do have the right to make huge profits, even when the economy isn’t doing so hot.

Also, “irregardless” isn’t a word.

No one wants to admit they are taking advantage of the people by ripping them off ? so the buck will be passed from one to the other hoping the money trail will not be found.

Kaye, if companies are making huge profits, then the money trail isn’t that difficult to follow. For instance, here’s Exxon-Mobil’s latest 10-Q report. On page three, you’ll find an income statement, and on page five you’ll find a statement of cash flows. Note that while revenues grew by 22%, expenses increased by roughly the same percent, with the biggest increases coming in the purchases of crude oil. Now why would they be spending so much more money on crude oil, you ask? Well, let’s take a look at this nifty chart:

clfclose.gif
Wowsers! The price of crude oil has really been going up in the last year! Y’think that might have something to do with the rise in gas prices?

Price gouging is certainly nothing new, but when an entire nation is practically paralyzed from the greed of the fuel industry, somebody needs to step in and curtail their avaritia appetites.

Gas is essential and vital to Americans, so it’s an easy target for money vultures to set their own gouging prices.

I’m simply amazed how Kaye can go from being a hard-right Christian nutcase in one column to being a borderline socialist in the next.

I find it absurd that many are pondering charging more taxes on gasoline for the drivers of “sports utility” vehicles. Are they trying to put the large vehicle manufacturers’ out-of-business?

No, they’re trying to provide incentive for people to buy more fuel-efficient cars. Also, it’s pretty impossible to demand that “sports utility” vehicles pay higher gas taxes than other cars, so you must be referring to a sales tax on the “SU”V’s themselves.

It’s a little scary wondering what the next suggestions to circumscribe consumers will be. Can “rationing” gasoline cards allowing just one fill-up per week be far behind? Since we seem to be moving closer to a communistic country ? look for all types of restrictions ahead.

And we all know that the best way to prevent supply shortages is by setting price ceilings.

Next the speed limit will probably drop from 65 mph (on interstates) to 40 mph. If my memory serves me correctly, during the last gasoline gouging era the speed limit dropped to 50 mph. But the claim during this time focused primarily on a vast fuel shortage. And many logically minded people didn’t bite into that claim, especially after gas and crude oil prices skyrocketed.

Kaye, do you really think that gas is supposed to get cheaper during a fuel shortage? Are you trying to destroy my will to live, or is that just a natural byproduct of reading your columns?

The government has certainly earned their reputation of being untrustworthy. And they don’t seem to be too concerned or motivated to change or at least to paint (temporarily) over their leopard spots, that is until it is time for reelection. Politicians have one goal in life, and that is to get in office and stay there until “Father Time” sends them out decrepit.

Or in Strom Thumond’s case, long after they become decrepit.

When you observe many people (especially senior citizens) counting out their pennies to pay for two or three gallons of gasoline, it is obvious many have broken open piggy banks to aid in paying for their expensive gas.

Either that or they’re senile and they think a tank of gas still costs a nickel.

Joy riding except for the rich is becoming a thing of the past. A popular email making the rounds contends that if everyone would not buy gasoline for one day, the gas companies would lose around $4. 5 billion, but the gas companies maintain this strategy would have little impact on the economy. Boy, is this type of attitude arrogant or what?

Yes, it’s so arrogant when people state facts.

But if you stop and think logically about this statement they may be right.

Kaye, thinking logically isn’t one of your stronger qualities. You might want to stick to writing poems.

If you don’t buy gas for a day and then buy it the next day ? you haven’t accomplished much with your boycott. Because if you buy gas one day, you’re not going to buy it the next day anyway, unless you do a lot of traveling. Now, if the boycott last for a week or month, this will certainly make at least a sizable dent in the profits of fuel companies. It’s the truckers who will suffer the most out on the highways trying to make a decent living. Let’s face it ? the only way not buying gasoline is going to eventually hurt the gas companies, is to find other means of transportation or for scientists to get their minds off of cloning and inventing an alternative to gas and crude oil.

I love how Kaye thinks that the reason scientists haven’t developed an efficient fuel alternative to gasoline is because they haven’t tried hard enough (or more specifically, they’ve been spending too much time trying to clone Hitler’s brain).

Many elderly people who are still driving are being forced not only to choose between whether they eat or buy essential medications ? now they have the headache of trying to scrounge up enough money to buy a gallon of gasoline just to get to the doctor’s office or grocery store and back.

See, this is what Social Security is for. This is why so many of us were opposed to Bush’s plan to turn it into an investment scheme.

Since those involved in price gouging don’t have a conscience it is up to the leaders to step in and quit making mundane excuses about whose to blame for the out-of-control fuel costs and come up with a workable solution to get the prices under control.

People need food and vital medications to survive ? so, if all else fails in trying to reason with fuel companies to lower their cost, maybe it’s time to invest in a horse and buggy. Maybe we need to observe how some of the “Amish” communities manage to function without gas-guzzling automobiles.

I honestly can’t tell if she’s joking here or not. And frankly, that’s pretty sad.

Just think of how much cleaner the environment would be if gas-free forms of transportation were resurrected. Oh . . . but just think of the inconvenience as well.
Ah. She is joking. I think.

So…it looks like they have us strapped over a barrel ? at least for the time being.

Uh, I don’t know who has you “strapped over a barrel,” Kaye, but I’m really not into that sort of thing.

 

Comments: 62

 
 
 

She’s a pinko! Welcome to the fold, dear, here’s your Che t-shirt, a dictionary, and a logic handbook so you can improve your subversive screeds. Power to the people!

 
 

. . .scientists to get their minds off of cloning and inventing an alternative to gas and crude oil.

“All right, all you microbiologists and reproductive biologists, raise your hands. As of today you’re going to be chemical engineers instead. You will all be able to keep your white lab coats, which should ease the transition.”

 
 

Gawd, you gotta love this woman! She’s the Mt. Rushmore of stupidity, the Apollo Space Program of imbecility!

It just goes on and on and on: “Gas gouging…creating piggy bank era”? What the hell language is that?? “curtail their avaritia appetites.”? Nice job of looking up “avaritia”, Kay; too bad you missed the part where it said “noun.”

Kay as teacher, to scientist as student:
[slaps ruler on desk]
You! Get your filthy mind off cloning and come up with a car that doesn’t need fuel!!

I wonder if Kay has a fan club.

 
 

Just remember, she doesn’t speak for everyone on the right. We also have a few ideological coherent pundits in our corner, remarkably intelligent ones like Newt Gingrich (I’m hope I’m intelligent enough to have spelled his name correctly, because I’m certainly too lazy to look it up), and once-Clinton-advisor-now-Clinton’s-worst-Halloween-nightmare, Dick Morris. Sure, some may believe he stole the title to his DVD from my song, FahrenHYPE 9/11, but even if he did (which I doubt), when I hear his brilliant comments on Hannity and Colmes, all is forgiven.

 
suburban refugee
 

Wow. A pair of pudgy has-beens whose accomplishments include abandoning their spouse, getting caught with a call girl, being tossed out of Congress, and making a shitty movie that no one cared about.

I’m waiting for Kay’s column about the rising price of rubber cement.

 
 

My God, the world is full of unfeeling capitalists. Those poor dog food eating elderly. Send the corporate price gougers to Guatnamo, they’re the real terrorists.

Seriously, does anybody read this trash except for you? Sadly, No!

 
 

The government has certainly earned their reputation of being untrustworthy.”

You know, Kaye, it?s that sort of bad-mouthing of America that has turned this country from a bastion of God?s grace into toilet of secular humanism. I certainly hope that none of our brave boys in Iraq read that sentence, lay down their M-16?s, stop searching for the WMD that Sadam used to bring down the WTC, and turn Gay.

 
 

If my memory serves me correctly, during the last gasoline gouging era the speed limit dropped to 50 mph.
It was 55 mph, Kaye.
But if you stop and think logically…
Ah, Kaye, if only YOU would.

 
 

“we seem to be moving closer to a communistic country ”

we’re moving closer? What’s she talking about continental drift? Is Florida breaking off and floating towards Cuba?

“Joy riding except for the rich is becoming a thing of the past.”

I am simply in awe of someone who can write a sentance like this.

“think of how much cleaner the environment would be if gas-free forms of transportation were resurrected”

Bicycles — once dead but now risen from the grave! It’s a miracle!

“it is up to the leaders to step in and quit making mundane excuses about whose to blame ”

I love the idea of our leaders “stepping in” to “quit”. That’s being proactive!! And whose WHAT are we blaming?

“the only way not buying gasoline is going to eventually hurt the gas companies, is to find other means of transportation or for scientists to get their minds off of cloning and inventing an alternative to gas and crude oil.”

Heh. The ONLY way is A or B.

 
 

Brad, shouldn’t you check out those spots on her outfit (I can’t tell if it’s a blouse or a dress. Maybe she’s being swallowed by a cheetah.) I’m sure those aren’t really spots, but little hammers & sickles.

 
 

They look more like little pictures of Che Guevera.

 
 

And didn’t Kaye get the memo from Wingnut Central? Price gouging is GOOD!

 
 

“People need food and vital medications to survive ? so, if all else fails in trying to reason with fuel companies to lower their cost, maybe it’s time to invest in a horse and buggy. Maybe we need to observe how some of the “Amish” communities manage to function without gas-guzzling automobiles.”

Let’s see her lob that one John Stossel’s way…

 
 

Actually, and I feel I can trust you all with this inside information on double bubble super duper secret background with a cherry on top, the shirt is one of those stereo images where you have to unfocus your eyes: it’s really Noam Chomsky and Ward Churchill using a bong to abort a baby flag.

 
 

Dick Morris is “brilliant,” Dr BLT?

Then I guess the fact that he’s been proven wrong about just about everything, over and over and again and again, can be overlooked.

Because he’s brilliant, you see.

 
 

I love Dr. BLT. You are totally insane, mayonnaise head!

 
 

The voice of the Bush Jugen speaks!

 
 

Wow, she’s so far right she’s starting to see the other side.

 
 

Wow, she’s so far right she’s starting to see the other side.

 
 

Wow, she’s so far right she’s starting to see the other side.

Oh and this:it’s really Noam Chomsky and Ward Churchill using a bong to abort a baby flag.
damn that’s funny
Sidenote on John Stossel, since his price gouging article, and my posting his emails, he sent one or two more but stopped when evidently he realized he was a smacktard.

 
 

ok that post calls for apology, am I the only one that gets the posting cgi to lag out like mad?

 
 

OK, Suburban, so both Dick Morris and Newt Gingrich have had their share of personal peccadilloes, but we won’t go there unless you want to bring old Billy into the picture. He’s gone through enough over the Lewinsky matter, so we don’t need to drag him through the mud again. And yes, if you compare the movie, FahrenHYPE 9/11 to my song of the same title, the song is much better (though some of you would say that’s not saying much)—notwithstanding the fact that he came up with the title a few months after my song of the same title had been aired nationally, and just a few weeks after he had listened to a CD I gave him at a book signing. But as I said, he is brilliant. And Spencer, someone can be brilliant and still make a lot of mistakes– the reason Dick has been proven wrong so many times is not because he is not brilliant, it’s because he goes out on a limb and makes too many predictions. Suburban, true, they have both packed on a few pounds, and are pudgy (especially Dick Morris), but is you’re equating that with lack of intelligence, what does that say about Michael Moore?

 
 

Correction above (…is you’re equating should read: …if you’re equating…)

 
 

Don’t you think that someone who would wear a leopard-print blouse like that would choose a different metaphor when writing this:

“they don’t seem to be too concerned or motivated to change or at least to paint (temporarily) over their leopard spots,”

Or is she just too, too perfect?

“someone can be brilliant and still make a lot of mistakes– the reason Dick has been proven wrong so many times is not because he is not brilliant, it’s because he goes out on a limb and makes too many predictions.”

Dr. BLT, I know someone like this, too. He don’t call him brilliant, though, in my family. We call him that sonuvabitch brother in law who’s always in debt.

And I love you on whole wheat toast. That’s the truth.

 
 

Whoops. It’s going around. I meant “WE don’t call him brilliant,” not “He don’t call him brilliant.”

 
 

The government has certainly earned their reputation of being untrustworthy. And they don’t seem to be too concerned or motivated to change or at least to paint (temporarily) over their leopard spots, that is until it is time for reelection

And no comment about her leopard spots? I was really disappointed.

Also, BLT just used the “Michael Moore is fat” defense (yes, yes, he’ll say he was countering something else but he chose to answer that comment and none of the substantive ones so he still gets credit for the underlying idea). The Editors must be so proud.

 
 

Fulsome, I guess criticism from you is better than fulsome praise. By the way, just for the record, I wasn’t using the “Michael Moore is fat defense,” I was pointing out the ridiculousness of such a defense, whether it is used by the right, or, in this case, the left. Believe me, Michael Moore’s weight is the least of his problems.

 
 

I know the whole article is hilarious, but I am wrong to think the best part was when she put quotes around Amish. “Amish”. hee.

also, zombie bicycles for the win!

 
 

I didn’t notice that, she put quotes around amish as if they were some sort of mythical urban legend. what the monkeyfuck?

 
 

From a different kaye article:Hillary Clinton supports abortion and says it should remain legal, safe, and rare. She voted “no” on banning the “Partial Birth Abortion” procedure, which is one of the most horrendous acts of pure murder a baby can be forced to endure.
That last sentence is the partial birth abortion of a logical thought.

 
 

I’m simply amazed how Kaye can go from being a hard-right Christian nutcase in one column to being a borderline socialist in the next.

I’m wondering if she’s totally oblivious to how far this deviates from the talking points or she doesn’t care, or what.

 
Hysterical Woman
 

How do you “endure” a murder? If you survive, it’s a murder attempt, not a murder.

 
Modern Major-General
 

Why’d she put quotation marks around the word Amish? Is she implying that they’re not Amish?

 
 

I’d bet good money that in her family, and in her church, she’s honestly considered “the smart one.”

 
 

“I’m waiting for Kay’s column about the rising price of rubber cement.”
That would be devastating for her, since she obviously huffs it before writing her column. No worry-I’m sure she’s hoarded enough for another year’s worth of gems like these.

 
 

The love is mutual, Pinko. Maybe she put quotes around “Amish” because it was some sort of secret message to folks at vocal minority at Sadly, no, who are skilled at the Amish art of shunning as applied to those who don’t share their liberal groupthink.

 
 

Dr BLT,

I agree with you that you did not use the, “But, hey, Michael Moore is fat” defense. You are exonerated from that offense.

However you keep suggesting that he stole his title from you, that some how Fahrenheit 9/11 belonged to you. I am sorry to tell you this but you stole that from the actual original title “Fahernheit 451” written from Ray Bradbury. So if you admit you ripped it off from Bradbury, then maybe, just maybe, you can see that it was possible that someone else also ripped it off from him as well. (Hint: the universe does not revolve around you and your wannabe folk songs.)

 
 

P.S. Dr BLT, could you please repost a new link to your anti-Kerry halloween song, I couldn’t get that last one to work.

 
 

Quack quack.

 
Modern Major-General
 

Maybe she put quotes around “Amish” because it was some sort of secret message to folks at vocal minority at Sadly, no, who are skilled at the Amish art of shunning as applied to those who don’t share their liberal groupthink.

That’s pretty big talk for a guy in a pink bunny costume.

 
 

Jeff, my innuendo implying that Dick Morris ripped off my song title for his DVD was said with tongue-in-cheek. I should have told you I had a whimsical exaggeration in mind. I think Dick Morris is a basically good man with plenty of creative ideas of his own. I cannot picture him doing such a thing. If you’d heard my song Short Part/Long Cake Music Video, a self-mocking tune about my relatively minor role in an MTV-award nominated music video by a band called Cake, you’d understand that I don’t take myself as serious as it may seem upon one’s first impression.

As for the link to Scary Kerry, I would recommend trying this one:
http://www.drblt.com/music/ScaryKerry.mp3
Although it’s basically the same one I provided previously. I tested it out and it should work.

If that doesn’t work, just go to
http://www.drblt.com/freesong.htm or access it at
http://www.drblt.com

Thanks for your interest in the song, and please let me know if you find it to be a trick, a treat, or a little of both.

Modern Major-General, I’m sorry but that pink bunny costume comment whizzed right over my head. If you’re talking about me, I think you must have had a little too much to drink at a Halloween party and you’ve mistaken me for somebody else. I wouldn’t be caught dead in such an outfit. This Halloween I was actually thinking of dressing up like Michael Moore. I’ve been trying to pack on the pounds and stay up all hours of the night to try to induce some form of sleep-deprivation psychosis just so I’ll be more believable.

 
suburban refugee
 

“I’ve been trying to pack on the pounds and stay up all hours of the night to try to induce some form of sleep-deprivation psychosis just so I’ll be more believable”

So you’ll be going as Jonah Goldberg then.

Here’s the big difference between Moore and the two idiots you worship: Moore actually accomplished something by directing movies that were actually worth watching, while Gingrich and Morris sit on their fat asses basking in the fading afterglow of their so-called accomplishments.

 
 

“many logically minded people didn’t bite into that claim” jeez

 
 

Rowan, I must admit that you’ve got a great sense of humor. That Jonah Goldberg retort is really quite hillarious. And I do acknowledge that neither Gingrich or Morris are great movie directors. I have nothing against Moore as a director, but I just wish he had something more objective to rely on for the movie content than paranoid delusions and half-baked conspiracy theories. Moore may be “basking in the fading afterglow…” but I think Gingrich just may have higher aspirations. I wouldn’t be surprised if he ran for president in ’08. If he did, he would have my vote, no doubt about it.

 
Modern Major-General
 

I wouldn’t be caught dead in such an outfit.

Are you sure about that? I have documented proof that you own such a costume. I also have pictures of you wearing the costume in public, and sworn testimonials from women stating that you wear the costume during sex as some sort of fertility ritual. Don’t bother denying it.

 
 

How could THAT be worn in a fertility ritual? If anything it would induce frigidity or impotence (depending on who was wearing it, and who had to look at it.)

 
 

Rowan, I must admit that you’ve got a great sense of humor. not me doc, that was suburban refugee

 
 

What noone here has ever heard of furries? Christ this is the fucking
internets!
Get with the new fetishes!
Disclaimer: No i’m not a furry and yes, it is disgusting.

 
 

Disclaimer: No i’m not a furry and yes, it is disgusting.

That’s good. I was very close to banning you 😉

 
Modern Major-General
 

How could THAT be worn in a fertility ritual?

It has something to do with Eostre, the Anglo-Saxon fertility goddess, who’s symbol was the hare. As for the pinkness of the costume, my guess is that the Doc’s a little fruity.

 
 

That’s good. I was very close to banning you 😉
And for good reason too 😀

no i’m more of a traditional fetishist… If such a thing exists…

 
 

What noone here has ever heard of furries?

Oh, eeeuuuuccchh! ::shudder::
Geeze, at least what I’m sexually attracted to is human. Though in the case of my ex, that’s debatable….

 
 

Maybe because I have a sick and twisted attraction to Kaye and her feline-inspired tops, but…

Doesn’t Exxon’s financial statement (Item 1.) you link to show their Net Income for the 6 months ending June 30, 2005 jumped to $15, 500 million from $11,230 million for the same period in 2004?

“Net” means after accounting for costs, right? I’m no mathematician but it seems like Exxon is not going to the Poorman’s house anytime soon, even though the ay-rabs are jacking up the price of crude.

Seriously, dude, regardless of Kaye’s inept punctuation, the world’s smallest violin is playing a sad song for the Oil Corporations these days.

 
 

Seriously, dude, regardless of Kaye’s inept punctuation, the world’s smallest violin is playing a sad song for the Oil Corporations these days.

Yes, my point, though, was that while there was a gain in earnings for energy companies, it’s not because they’re out to bilk consumers through market manipulation a la Enron & friends in California. The rise in gas prices is a natural outcome of having increased demand for oil overseas, as well as having refineries taken out by Katrina. Witness the Krugman:

Now, much of the public believes that corporate evildoers with close ties to the administration are conspiring to drive prices up. But this time they aren’t, at least so far…

In fact, the current crisis is nobody’s fault, except Mother Nature’s. Both Katrina and Rita were stronger hurricanes when they plowed through offshore oil and gas fields than when they made landfall. And because damaged refineries and other energy facilities are competing for a limited number of repair crews, it’s taking a long time to get those facilities back up and running.

 
 

Again, I maybe biased by my fondness for leopard print lycra, but…

Corporations aren’t good or evil. Like Funky Finger Productions Corporations’ mission statement says, their only goal is “mo’ money, mo’ money, mo’ money”. Corporations are non-human entities. The idea of sacrifice for the public good does not compute.

If crude prices rise, the Oil Corporations are sure as shit going to pass those costs on to you, the captive sucka-ass consumer who needs to drive to earn an income and procure food.

Kaye’s hold must be really strong on me, because I would like to kind of disagree with the Krugmanomicon: retail gas prices were rising steadily well before Katrina created Lake George in New Orleans. The reason for that could be shortage of supply or that the leaders of the OPEC countries (The Arabs and That Brown Dude from Venezuela we tried to oust) hate our fucking guts because we’re percieved as insane imperialist assholes. Let the fucking gringos twist in the wind, they say. What do they care, they’re making bank and Americans will pay whatever they have to.

That is, one way or another, people will have to be persuaded to limit their consumption of natural gas, gasoline and heating oil to match the available supply.

I lived in Minnesota for a while and let me tell ya, there, cutting back further on the heat when it’s 30 below outside is not a fucking option. When I went to visit recently, I was freezing my ass off, indoors, so I went to the thermostat and noticed the cobwebs had locked it in at 52 degrees.

This is yet another example of why corporations suck at delivering utilities humans need to survive. When it comes to optional items like Diet Coke or Playstation, fine. But if US citizens have to freeze and get sick because they can’t afford to pay the heating bill, that’s fucking wrong.

If the US government went to the Oil Corporations and said “look, US citizens are hurting, how about you cut back one or two percentage points on your net profits and give them a break? No? How about we actually make sure you pay taxes this year? How would you like that? Alrighty then.” That would be fine with me.

I don’t subscribe to the Republican Bamboozle-Propaganda assumption that what is good for Exxon Mobil Corporation is good for me. If the Corporate Board Members have to postpone buying that second yacht, I’ll live.

I would much rather my Government, which is supposed to be responsible to Citizens not Corporations, stepped in and blocked Corporations from doing things that harm Citizens. I believe that’s what Government is supposed to do. Instead of what is illustrated on the front page of The New and Mightier Corrente Building. (warning hang on to your beverages).

I would also like my Government to eliminate tax deductions for non-farmers (like lawyers) who buy SUV’s. I would like the Government to encourage Biodiesel and hybrids with tax breaks.

Instead of putting all the responsibility on Joe Citizen to stop taking those frivolous joyrides to work and to the supermarket.

Kaye is sooo hot. Rawr!

 
 

Not sure why I’m bothering, but….

People need food and vital medications to survive ? so, if all else fails in trying to reason with fuel companies to lower their cost, maybe it’s time to invest in a horse and buggy. Maybe we need to observe how some of the “Amish” communities manage to function without gas-guzzling automobiles.

Just think of how much cleaner the environment would be if gas-free forms of transportation were resurrected.

Umm, Kaye? Horses aren’t exactly pollution-free, if you know what I mean (and somehow, I doubt you do).

 
 

You mean no one else saw the “Furries” episode of CSI?? damn.

I doubt Kaye knows much about Horse by-products. She seems to be more interested in bull shit than horse shit.

 
 

“corporations aren’t good or evil”

— oh yes, they are

 
 

Sorry, Rowan. I guess I didn’t have enough coffee when I gave the compliment to the wrong person. Sorry, Sub, that compliment, and the retort that followed it, was meant for you. Once again, I stand corrected. Once again I have been humbled. Rowan, I’m sure you have a sense of humor too. It’s just that your humor is so subtle and so brilliant that it goes right over my head.

 
 

Well alrighty then.

Now I’m off to watch Canadian Bacon, and then I’ll join the liberal conspiracy in oppressing college Republicans. After all, it’s time they learn what oppression really looks like.

 
 

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