Items In The News Are Funny

Steele: GOP needs ‘hip-hop’ makeover
Thursday, February 19, 2009
The Washington Times

Newly elected Republican National Committee Chairman Michael S. Steele plans an “off the hook” public relations offensive to attract younger voters, especially blacks and Hispanics, by applying the party’s principles to “urban-suburban hip-hop settings.”

The RNC’s first black chairman will “surprise everyone” when updating the party’s image using the Internet and advertisements on radio, on television and in print, he told The Washington Times.

Above: What do you mean? The swastika is an honored Native American symbol.
 

Comments: 419

 
 
 

The Sadly Nazi stamp of approval is my favorite internet tradition to date.

Great stuff, Gav.

 
 

I said a hip, hop, a hippity to the hippity hip hip hop
Vote for us, and the cops won’t pop a cap in your chimplike butt.

 
 

Steele: GOP needs ‘hip-hop’ makeover

I don’t even want to imagine what a hip-hop version of the GOP would look like, although the first thing that popped into my head was Pat Boone singing “I’ll Still Kill” with 50 Cent.

 
 

Yo, Rush! We got some nonbelievers out there…

 
 

But–but—black man—monkey! Dogwhistle!

 
 

Thus we see ultimate proof that liberals, and specifically Sadly, No! are the real racists….

expect a truth infestation in 3…2…1….

 
 

Mee the new GOP, same as the old GOP. Its motto: “Within marketing, everything. Outside of marketing, nothing.”

 
 

I would, however, like to see how this will play to the David Duke faction….

 
 

I can’t wait to see Boner and Cantor dancing the rap hop to Cypress Hill, wearing black face and Raiders hats.

 
 

Not necessary. As many of you already know, Jason Mattera already gave the GOP a hip hop makeover last year. Does it get any doper than that?

 
 

dancing the rap hop to Cypress Hill

I’m a chicken hawk [loop it].

 
 

Steele: “See, the way this works is, if I lower your taxes, you get to pimp out your ride with some new mags and that’s so fly that yo mama will hurt”

 
 

I would, however, like to see how this will play to the David Duke faction….

Come now. Surely we can make an educated guess.

 
 

“I said a hip, hop, a hippity to the hippity hip hip hop”

What with the hippin’ and the hoppin’ and the bippin’ and the boppin’! That Michael Steele is one hip-to-the-jive cat! 23 skidoo!

 
 

But didn’t racism officially end because the Stealth Muslim who was secretly born in Kenya to Malcolm X was illegitimately elected President by Acorn?

 
 

#

OB-GYN Kenobi said,

February 19, 2009 at 19:03 (kill)

I would, however, like to see how this will play to the David Duke faction….

Come now. Surely we can make an educated guess.

excuse me. I meant to say I would like to WATCH how this will play to the David Duke faction.

 
 

You know, now that I think about it, this off-the-hook (but definitely not cutting-edge) hip-hop publicity campaign announced by Steele is completely concordant with the direction the Republican Party has been moving since at least the fall of last year. After all, John McCain got the coveted Daddy Yankee endorsement.

 
Dragon-King Wangchuck
 

Is this the same Michael Steele from the phantom cookies incident?

 
 

Genius….sheer genius.

The cartoon, not Steele.

 
 

It will be avant garde, technically

Fail.

 
rip rappin' bob "confeezy yankeezy" owenz
 

yo yo yo wassup wassup i know you aint been tippin over mah char-coal greeeeeyull gimme a hells ya if ya holla know what i sayin bout obama socializin the terrorizin of north cackalacky and mah char-coal greeeeeeeeeyull ya feels me

 
 

urban-suburban hip-hop settings

This is certain to invigorate the frightened white portion of the GOP demographic, that is to say the GOP demographic.

 
 

Nicely played, Gavin.

It’s…it’s BEYOND cutting edge.

 
 

It would certainly be funny if one of the esteemed troll parodists failed to bring the Cool Coach to this party…..

And by ‘Funny’ I mean ‘Kind of a relief, actually’

 
 

I’m sure the RNC is thrilled with Steele’s daring gamble. Finally Caucasian GOPers will be able to reap all the benefits of using the N-word!

 
 

So, now.

Is Sarah Palin a bitch or a ho?

 
 

Steele’s throwing a party? Man, but I just let my dogs out.

 
 

Finally Caucasian GOPers will be able to reap all the benefits of using the N-word!

I envision many laborious tutoring sessions dealing with the difference between “nigga” and “nigger”.

 
Xecklothxayyquou Gilchrist
 

This is certain to invigorate the frightened white portion of the GOP demographic, that is to say the GOP demographic.

I think they’re counting on that part of the demographic – i.e., all of it – not knowing what the other hand is doing, so to speak. It’s part of their mastery of modern communication technology, or something. And counting on their base not venturing outside their gated communities.

 
Coach Urban Meyer
 

Wuzza-wuzzup loony libizzles? Heh indeedy for sheedy, if you know what the Cool Coach is saying with his SPRIZZLE of TRIZZLE! That’s right, the Man of Steele has got the McCaniac Partaaay back on track, which means you’re gonna make tracks when Super Sarah, the Power Palin, and Boss Bobby Jindal smack you with their SPREAD of FISTS in 2012! The Obummer won’t have a clizzue what hit him! Urban out.

 
 

Some people just don’t understand satire.

 
 

That cartoon makes me twitchy. I know you’re making fun of it and all, but still…uncool.

 
Coach Urban Meyer forgets his meds
 

Yo, yo, y…

Ah, fuck it. OK, your guy won, big whoop, like I’m surprised. I’m actually a little embarrassed by the whole Super Sarah thing.

I dunno what get’s into me.

Uh, out.

 
 

No no no, it’s “nigra”, not “neegra”

 
 

Newly elected Republican National Committee Chairman Michael S. Steele plans an “off the hook” public relations offensive to attract younger voters, especially blacks and Hispanics, by applying the party’s principles to “urban-suburban hip-hop settings.”

We’re totally convinced our marketing department can come up with a fittingly conservative version of “The Anthem.” ¡Dale!

 
 

It will be especially fun to watch them bashing one another upside they haids deciding whether to let him into the country club for the fundraiser.

 
 

This thread has gone meta

 
 

That cartoon makes me twitchy. I know you’re making fun of it and all, but still…uncool.

Find some steel, Matt. This is necessary.

 
Xecklothxayyquou Gilchrist
 

Newly elected Republican National Committee Chairman Michael S. Steele plans an “off the hook” public relations offensive to attract younger voters, especially blacks and Hispanics…

I’m sure it will in fact be very offensive.

 
 

You too can smoke a blunt with Roy Blunt.

You too can get down with Larry Craig.

You too can rub Armstrong Williams’ head.

You too can shake your booty with Rudy.

Today’s GOP, it’s da shizzle.

Brought to you by the new and improved HIP-GOP PAC.

-GSD

 
 

The Jungle Drums, they ring out from the Tennessee GOP!
.

 
 

Here’s a sample of what the GOP’s attempt to lure black voters with an urban, hip-hop setting might look like:

Rap: The Musical

 
MC Mitt "Tha Miz-nitt" Romney
 

Hey buddy! How’s it going? What’s happening? You got some bling bling here!

Who let the dogs out? WHO! WHO!

 
 

Someone needs to tell Steele that the GOP still thinks that newfangled “rock ‘n roll” is a bunch of noise that leads to teh sex.

 
 

That’s Republican Par-TAY.

 
 

Michael Steel : Hip Hop :: Sarah Palin :: ?

a) Nucluar Engineer
b) Competent Mother
c) Punk Rock
d) Forein Policy Expert
You are being graded hippies…

 
 

Find some steel, Matt. This is necessary.

I don’t know. I don’t get the “necessary” part, but then, I’m not comfortable aping what I despise, even as satire (though I do love the Hitler-skull logo). Besides, the people that don’t already get the point will never be swayed by logic or clever mirth.

It’s not as though Steele hasn’t already given us the deed to a friggin’ humor mine, the depths and richness of which have yet to be plumbed.

 
 

Finally Caucasian GOPers will be able to reap all the benefits of using the N-word!

As a matter of fact, Boston’s local talk radio blowhard Jay Severin (formerly fond of calling the President Barack “Yo-bama,” though I haven’t heard him do that in a while) talks from time to time how “fascistic” it is that black people can use words that white people can’t.

 
The Truth's brain
 

ka-BOOM

 
 

I think they’re counting on that part of the demographic – i.e., all of it – not knowing what the other hand is doing, so to speak. It’s part of their mastery of modern communication technology, or something.

Yep. It’s an extension of their SOP:

1. Run ads about the dreaded Brown Satan in all regions through most of their campaigns.
2. At the last minute toss the “We’re the Party of Lincoln” ad into a few key regions.
3. When the WPL ads don’t work for some mysterious reason it’s time for the anonymous robo-calls warning of cops with warrants at the polls.
4. Scratch head over the fact that the Brown Satan is staying away in droves.
5. Repeat.

 
 

You’ll never catch me sukkahs!

 
 

Michael Steel : Hip Hop :: Sarah Palin :: ?

a) Nucluar Engineer
b) Competent Mother
c) Punk Rock
d) Forein Policy Expert
You are being graded hippies…

Ooh! Ooh! I know this one…. OK, I give up.

 
 

Hey, Matt, I understand your discomfort. I felt a little ill yesterday when I first saw that thing. I suppose the word ‘necessary is hyperbolic but the horse is out of the barn now. It’s important that non-wingnuts respond with something a little better than “this sucks”.

Gavin mentioned a couple of posts ago that he was struggling because there is ‘always more to them than you can quite get at’. Today, Michael Steele steps up and puts it perfectly into focus.

 
 

Oh please oh please let the old white GOP party try to repackage themselves with an ‘urban aesthetic’. I cannot think of a single thing that would be more insincere or funny.

Topped only by the circular firing squad that will follow after the doomed initiative fails and the idiots who thought this was a good idea square off with the David Dukers and the rock^H^H^H^H hiphop is satan Reagan hold-overs.

 
The Hip-Hoppin' Glenn Reynolds Robot
 

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Oh please oh please let the old white GOP party try to repackage themselves with an ‘urban aesthetic’. I cannot think of a single thing that would be more insincere or funny.

You down with Gee-oh-Pee

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/O.P.P._(song)

 
 

The Hip-Hoppin’ GR’bot:

Pleasing symmetry fail.

 
 

As per usual, Ronald Reagan showed conservatives the way.

 
 

The Hip-Hoppin’ Glenn Reynolds Robot: that was off the heh-zle.

 
 

Bob Goodman. I wouldn’t want the pop-up text to mislead.

 
 

Take it from Steele The Shocker: Ain’t no party like a Grand Old Party/ Cause the Grand Old Party is the shit.

 
 

I wouldn’t want the pop-up text to mislead.

Wait’ll HTML 5.0 and poop-up text. Oh man it’ll be great.

 
 

Can’t touch him

 
 

Now is the time for me.

 
 

If we’re dragging Mr. Show into it, this has to be the standard

As hilarious as it is, it is really sad that the Republican party has finally eclipsed the gold standard of comedy, Mr. Show in self-satire. Cross and Odenkirk were our last best hope for the survival of fictional stupidity that didn’t actually exist in the real world.

Of course, there’s always this.

 
Kiaphet Amman'sor
 

rrrrrmwwwwwwrrrrrrrrrawrrrrr

 
 

OK, a question. During the election it was suggested by various asshats and other cretins that Obama was somehow responsible for every action by every black person in the country, including those who wrote or sang offensive rap and hip-hop songs. (Denounce & Reject!)

Now that the GOP is going to bust a move on that sector of the industry, does this make the GOP responsible for said unpleasant behavior or is Obama responsible for the GOP?

 
 

does this make the GOP responsible

When you encounter this question, one need go no further, for the answer is always “no.”

They’re still blaming the Great Depression on FDR, taking responsibility for stuff isn’t their bag.

 
 

Tom:

I don’t even want to imagine what a hip-hop version of the GOP would look like

Wonder no more!

 
 

Checking back to see if the Nazi Seal of Approval is still funny…

Yep. Fucking hilarious.

Gavin, I have a request.

Would it be possible to make the swastikas spin and the word ‘funny’ blink?

As I am a perpetual n00b, I’m not sure how technical that would be.

It would put it above even Teh Sammich in my mind.

 
 

RePublic Enemy: “It Takes a Nation of Millions to Hold Us Aloft” b/w “Fight the Powerless”

 
 

Actually, it does worry me some that a fair number of hip hop stars are wealthy sociopaths who would fit right in with the GOP’s fiscal agenda if the party wasn’t so unbelievably racist. Absent the last bit, the GOP probably could make inroads with blacks who’ve taken up that mentality.

I have no idea how significant a chunk of voters this is though, and maybe they’re already the >10% of blacks who vote GOP.

 
 

As I am a perpetual n00b, I’m not sure how technical that would be.

You know, this is actually kinda easy. I’m not sure about the Windows world – I believe some freeware of that nature exists – but in the Mac world there’s GIFBuilder which is pretty much a drag-and-drop affair: two photoshopped pictures for instance will become one animated GIF.

 
 

Absent the last bit, the GOP probably could make inroads with blacks who’ve taken up that mentality.

Chuck D would set them straight.

 
 

I don’t know, the richest of the rappers (Jay-Z, Luda, Fiddy Cent, Master P, etc.) are staunch Obama supporters.

I don’t see them switching teams any time soon.

 
 

I think spinning swastika eyes would be priceless.

 
 

#

t4toby said,

February 19, 2009 at 21:11 (kill)

I think spinning swastika eyes would be priceless.

In my mind, this is how I see our truthy troll…

 
 

It’s possible to do animated GIFs in Photoshop, although the feature is kind of weird and tacked on. Things blinking is a lot easier than rotating, as it happens, although… Well, lemme try it the next time the graphic comes up. And/or if you’d like to work on it in the meantime, etc…?

 
 

I’m not sure about the Windows world – I believe some freeware of that nature exists

The Gimp lets you make animations, using layers. Each frame would be one layer, and the saved animation would cycle through each with whatever delay you choose. Here’s one I made approx. one million years ago. I seem to recall thinking the process was pretty easy and fairly intuitive.

 
Enraged Bull Limpet
 

Newly elected Republican National Committee Chairman Michael S. Steele plans an “off the hook” public relations offensive to attract younger voters, especially blacks and Hispanics…

Fizzixed.

 
Coach Meyer Lansky
 

‘Cuz you know we be bigga than U.S. Steel.

 
Big Bad Bald Bastard
 

I’m down with GOP…
Keep markets free!

It’s funny, as much as Steele spouts the same old tired talking points, part of me has to like the guy, because his personal history is just so… unusual. Hell, I just found out last night that he was once an Augustinian seminarian.

I still laugh my ass off picturing him as “Giggle Time All-Mo”, though.

 
 

an “off the hook” public relations offensive to attract younger voters
I am not sure whose phone is off the hook here. Are the younger voters not answering calls, or is it the public-relations campaign?
Urban is to suburban as hip is to hop.

 
 

I don’t know, the richest of the rappers (Jay-Z, Luda, Fiddy Cent, Master P, etc.) are staunch Obama supporters.

And then there’s DMX:

Wow, Barack! The nigga’s name is Barack. Barack? Nigga named Barack Obama. What the fuck, man?! Is he serious? That ain’t his fuckin’ name. Ima tell this nigga when I see him, “Stop that bullshit. Stop that bullshit” [laughs] “That ain’t your fuckin’ name.” Your momma ain’t name you no damn Barack.

 
 

I just hope that between Michael Steele and Mitt Romney, someone can figure out who let the dogs out.

 
 

Actually, Fiddy supported Dubya (ain’t no party like a phonetically-spelled party) in ’04, on the grounds that he was “a gangsta”. So, yeah, at least one gangsta rapper has bought into the wingnut American dream that their lyrics sometimes seem to espouse. I’ve never been able to stand 50 Cent’s mush-mouthed, amelodic shitfests anyway; it’s exactly the kind of thing that gives middle-aged, barely-closeted racists ammo for their “It should be called CRAP music LOL!!!1!!eleventy!!” rants.

 
 

And/or if you’d like to work on it in the meantime, etc…?

I would do it, but I don’t have the tools…

 
 

“One-armed midgets”?

I think he’s been watching old eps of The Man Show….

 
Big Bad Bald Bastard
 

I think spinning swastika eyes would be priceless.

The swastikas, they’re spinnin’!

Need I even say, NSFW? Cussin’.

 
 

He came around in ’08, but I’m sure Jay-Z, Luda, and Master P are thoroughly Dems. Also, Beyonce.

 
 

I’ve never been able to stand 50 Cent’s mush-mouthed, amelodic shitfests anyway

Ooo, I can listen to “In the Club” over and over again for hours straight. And I do.

 
 

It’s possible to do animated GIFs in Photoshop, although the feature is kind of weird and tacked on. Things blinking is a lot easier than rotating, as it happens, although… Well, lemme try it the next time the graphic comes up. And/or if you’d like to work on it in the meantime, etc…?

Actually, for the rotation, you could probably fake it by alternating between one position and a 1/8ths turn to the right.

 
Jena Six! Jena Six! Prop 8!
 

I’d call this “racist”, only I don’t know “racist” means.

Can one of you liberals help me out?

 
Dragon-King Wangchuck
 

Wow. In the span to two weeks, the Republican party has gone from punk to hip-hop. I guess I missed the five or so seconds when the GOP was grunge. At this rate, theremins will be required for caucus meetings.

 
 

I can listen to “In the Club” over and over again for hours straight. And I do.

Any time that you might be holding a party in the future, I am washing my hair that night.

 
 

Maybe they’ll go alternative next week. I hope so, because then they’ll actually begin disdaining mainstream popularity. Although it’s hard to think of how you could disdain popularity more effectively than they seem to have already decided to.

 
 

I guess I missed the five or so seconds when the GOP was grunge.

Lamar Alexander likes flannel shirts . . .

 
 

50 Cent’s mush-mouthed

50 Cent is mush-mouthed because his mouth was pretty much literally made mush, on account of the bullets. Not that that stops him from sucking.

 
 

Ooo, I can listen to “In the Club” over and over again for hours straight. And I do.

A guilty pleasure of mine, as well. The beat is really what makes it.

If they hate then let ’em hate just watch the money pile up

Wait, maybe he is a Republican…

 
 

from punk to hip-hop
These markers of suburban urban streetwise credibility all look alike to me.

 
 

I would do it, but I don’t have the tools…

Wait, d’you have a Mac or PC?

 
 

via the Great Orange Satan:

Steele also said, and I’m not making this up, that “we need to uptick our image with everyone, including one-armed midgets.”

Man, I’m lovin’ me some Steele. He is to African Americans what Palin is to Women’s Lib.

 
Dragon-King Wangchuck
 

Incidentally, have we always been able to pop-up text or is this a “hte nü hawtness”?

 
 

Actually, for the rotation, you could probably fake it by alternating between one position and a 1/8ths turn to the right.

Is that something that works better with faster rotations, and with symmetrical patterns? I’m trying to picture it.

 
 

DKW, I always thought that was standard HTML, the “alt” tag?

 
 

How is the Penis game pop-up text?

Are you messing with me DKW?

 
 

I haven’t used it for animation, but I second the GIMP. Download it now.

Also:

http://www.gimp.org/tutorials/Simple_Animations/

 
Dragon-King Wangchuck
 

a212,
I just never noticed it before. Imagine all the PENISes I coulda been popping up. I gotta think of something else to link, just to pop-up some more PENIS.

 
 

I’m betting they go emo.

After all, they’ve got the self-absorption, self-pity and tantrum things down perfect…

 
 

One thing, even the worst hip hop stars know their audience loves them some Barack, so publicly switching to the GOP is a CLM of some kind.

I know I haven’t felt the same about Wilfred Brimley since I found out his party affiliation. Oatmeal just tastes like ashes now.

 
Dragon-King Wangchuck
 

t4t,
Mouseovers are your friend

 
 

After all, they’ve got the self-absorption, self-pity and tantrum things down perfect…

I think they’ve got the country vote locked up, pretty much…

 
 

Jeez, DWK, that would take the effort of me stopping and thinking instead of clicking the link all willy-nilly.

And that is most certainly not how I do the roll, Mr. Homie (/Steele)

 
Big Bad Bald Bastard
 

Wow. In the span to two weeks, the Republican party has gone from punk to hip-hop.

In his book England’s Dreaming, Jon Savage made a convincing case that rap is the African-American punk, as both embraced a DIY ethos. Oddly enough, Jamaican music (in the form of dub) was an important inspiration for the English punks and the original rappers in the Bronx.

Kinda trippy to see Chuck Schumer and DJ Kool Herc sharing a venue.

 
 

Wait, d’you have a Mac or PC?>/i>

Typical corporatecentric thinking. Linux r00lz, d00d.

[I got nuttin in re the topic on account of because Git offa my lawn!]

 
 

I like “In the Club” too. The rest of 50 Cent’s oeuvre, no.

 
 

I tried to install Linux via WUBI on my computer, but I have some graphic driver problem.

Mikey sent me a link to alleviate the problem which took me to a page that was, as far as I could tell, written entirely in Middle Swahili.

 
 

The GOP is incapable of being hip and will only look that much more pathetic for trying.

 
 

I like “In the Club” too. The rest of 50 Cent’s oeuvre, no.

I like how in Get Rich or Die Trying he actually goes to the trouble of crying. Can’t you see he is for real??

 
 

It will be avant garde, technically,” he said. “It will come to table with things that will surprise everyone – off the hook.”
Does that mean cutting-edge?

“I don’t do ‘cutting-edge,’ “ he said. “That’s what Democrats are doing. We’re going beyond cutting-edge.”

The man sure has a way with words. This should be fun.

 
 

Steele is the Anti-Biden.

TO HTE THUNDERDOME!!!!

 
Big Bad Bald Bastard
 

Argh, I have been trying to find the mashup of “In the Club” and the Bee Gees’ “Staying Alive” but the damn thing’s been scrubbed outa teh t00z!

Oddly enough, Ray of Gob is still up there.

 
 

Oatmeal just tastes like ashes now.

“Now”?

 
 

Not necessary. As many of you already know, Jason Mattera already gave the GOP a hip hop makeover last year. Does it get any doper than that?

Lawnguylander, I had to watch that entire clip – thanks for nothing. I felt like a rubbernecker at a particularly gruesome auto accident.

If I was Jason Mattera, I would stay the fuck away from any recording devices. How embarrassing.

 
Big Bad Bald Bastard
 

“I don’t do ‘cutting-edge,’ “ he said. “That’s what Democrats are doing. We’re going beyond cutting-edge.”

Uh, doesn’t this imply that they’re going to be the object/substance that is being cut?

 
 

Well, where else can you go with a Wilfred Brimley joke? There aren’t any cool Republicans.

 
 

But he was demonstrating what the Hep Hoppers call “Street Creditability! (/Steele)

 
 

Don’t call it a comeback / I been here for years / Rockin my peers puttin suckas in fear / Makin the bombs rain down like a MON-soon / Listen to the missiles go BOOM / Explosion, overpowerin / Over the Democrats I’m towerin / Wreckin shop when I drop, my corruption makes you call the cops /

I’m gonna knock you out / Reagan said knock you out

etc.

Ladies Love Conservative James

From the album “Drownin suckas in the bathtub”

 
Big Bad Bald Bastard
 

But he was demonstrating what the Hep Hoppers call “Street Creditability! (/Steele)

Heh, I wonder if there are any Street Cred Default Swaps.
Steele meltdown? Like a blast furnace!

 
 

Is that something that works better with faster rotations, and with symmetrical patterns? I’m trying to picture it.

It’s pretty much something you can only get away with when using symmetrical patterns. Since a 1/4 turn gives you the exact same image (thanks to the four arms on the swastika), add a frame in with an intermediate step (or steps, a single 1/8th turn or two 1/12th turns, etc., if you want to be fancy), cycle back to the initial image, and you’ve got a rotation without having to go through all the hassle.

 
 

I like how in Get Rich or Die Trying he actually goes to the trouble of crying. Can’t you see he is for real??

Heh. To be fair, as I go through my endless mp3 library listening to all the things I’ve accumulated without listening to them, 50 Cent winds up in the trash a lot. Mostly, even.

 
 

Freepers be off da hook, yo!?

To: robert561
This is stoopid….totally stoopid.
What…have Vanilla Ice as a spokesman? Why dont we get Biz Markie and Sir Mix-A-Lot while we are at it?
You bring in new voters by being true to your strong conservative message…which will be very important in 10 and 12 with Stimulus Bill
Beginning to wonder if Steele is a DNC plant….the dude is a freaking liberal….

18 posted on Thursday, February 19, 2009 12:10:52 PM by UCFRoadWarrior (The Biggest Threat To American Soverignty Is Rampant Economic Anti-Americanism)

More next Monday…..

 
 

(Needless to say, this works best with very small icons. Bigger images would require more frames to make the rotation look, well, rotate-y.)

 
 

Prawo Jazdy said,
February 19, 2009 at 20:05

Goddamn Polacks.

 
 

well, I was hoping for an epic brussels sprouts style oatmeal brawl….

 
 

I got seven Mack 11’s, about eight 38’s
Nine 9’s, ten mack tens, the shits never ends
You can’t touch my riches
Even if you had MC Hammer and them 357 bitches
Biggie Smalls; the millionare, the mansion, the yacht
The two weed spots, the two hot glocks
That’s how I got the weed spot
I shot dread in the head, took the bread and the lamb spread
Little Gotti got the shotty to your body
So don’t resist, or you might miss Christmas
I tote guns, I make number runs
I give mc’s the runs drippin
when I throw my clip in the AK, I slay from far away
Everybody hit the D-E-C-K
My slow flow’s remarkable, peace to Matteo
Now we smoke weed like Tony Montana sniffed the yeyo
That’s crazy blunts, mad L’s
My voice excels from the avenue to jail cells
Oh my God, I’m droppin shit like a pigeon
I hope you’re listenin, smackin babies at they christening

 
 

well, I was hoping for an epic brussels sprouts style oatmeal brawl….

Brilliant! Haggis with brassica! Brilliant!

 
 

yeah, I’m not going to be eating that, PeeJ…

I don’t even think I want to SMELL it.

 
 

I’ll bet it smells like troll.

Feety troll.

 
 

That cartoon is unfair to apes!

Hiphop as a vehicle to rebrand the GOP? Mmm, who knew that the sound of a barrel’s bottom being excavated could be so beautiful?

Also, get it right, folks – it’s not “blart” – it’s BLORT!

 
 

by applying the party’s principles to “urban-suburban hip-hop settings.”

I’m picturing a bunch of bloated white guys in suits, trying to dance… and then my brain exploded.

“Free market” over pictures of working girls!

“Capital Gains or Cap In Yo’ —” Shut your mouf!

I guess I just can’t see it.

 
Teh Great Gazoogle
 

Brilliant! Haggis with brassica! Brilliant!
Results 1 – 10 of about 13,200 for “vegetarian haggis”

 
 

I’m picturing a bunch of bloated white guys in suits, trying to dance… and then my brain exploded.

Karl Rove at the Press Corps dinner…

 
Dragon-King Wangchuck
 

Actually on sober second thought, hip-hop is probably a great way to rebuild the GOP.
War Hawks – all about da respect, and poppin caps.
Money Cons – da bling
Social Cons – ummm, well, they’re gullible?
Glibertarians – Fuck The Police!

Plus, they can go on hating the hippies.

 
 

[I got nuttin in re the topic on account of because Git offa my lawn!]

Git? Mercurial FTW!

 
 

How does on judge a successful party chairperson? Fundraising? Attendance at events? Voters registered or turned out?

No matter which one – I’d like to put a “sell” order in, please.

 
Big Bad Bald Bastard
 

“I like tax cuts and I don’t know why!”

 
Dragon-King Wangchuck
 

The Good Word.
The RNC, in the hizzy, we bene busy,
Bringing the conservative truth, ken ye fadge
You’re soaking in it, Madge.
‘cuz we is tax Killers,
That’s one of the five pillars
Alongside Strong Borders
Bailing out hoarders
Giving No Quarter
And no GAYS!

It’s the traditional definition
The traditional definition
The traditional definition
Of marriageconservative.
The search for a superior moral justification for selfishness.

 
 

OT but I can’t help myself. Rick Santorum gets big cheers in Nebraska. Offered without comment because he already exceeds anything parody, satire or snark can do.

He said he believes that Muslims are America’s enemy because they read their religion literally and apply it to real life, instead of in historical context.

The lecture continued when Santorum pointed out what he thought were the main differences between Christians and Muslims. Santorum said Christians, who believe in Jesus Christ, never governed or conquered anyone, but Mohammed was a warrior and killed people.

 
 

Beginning to wonder if Steele is a DNC plant….the dude is a freaking liberal….

Obviously this gentleman is treating Steele fairly on the basis of his involvement with the issues of the day, because racism doesn’t exist any more.

On the plus side, the inevitable day when whoever the Democrats pick square off against Snoop Dogg (R-NY) draws nearer and nearer.

 
 

The fact is, rwrroooooooooowrowwwwwww

 
 

PS – It was my great pleasure to be a part of his ouster back in PA. It is also my regret that I never acquired one of these campaign stickers

 
 

Thanks MBS. Most enjoyable.

 
 

Yay!

PeeJ finally has..a…web….Wait a second!

 
 

Mo Wins hte Intert00bz.

 
 

Newly elected Republican National Committee Chairman Michael S. Steele plans an “off the hook” public relations offensive to attract younger voters, especially blacks and Hispanics, by applying the party’s principles to “urban-suburban hip-hop settings.”

It’s been done.

 
Xecklothxayyquou Gilchrist
 

Michael S. Steele plans an “off the hook” public relations offensive to attract younger voters…

Are the younger voters going to know what “off the hook” means, what with those cellular teleophones they use now-a-days?

 
 

I’ve had a domain that I haven’t done anything with (almost) ever. abba-dingo.com, fwiw.

I have a blog as well which I also never got around to doing anything with. it’s curingreligion.blogspot.com/.

I been fixin to do something at both those places but… Excelsior!

 
 

Steele isn’t the only Republican urging the GOP to pull itself into the 20th century.

 
 

A Santorum sighting! Thanks, Peej.

I loved this part:

Santorum said he believes Muslims’ religious views cannot be changed or altered, so Middle Easterners reject American, democratic ideals.
“A democracy could not exist because Mohammed already made the perfect law,” Santorum said. “The Quran is perfect just the way it is, that’s why it is only written in Islamic.”

Islamic – now with more nouns, verbs and adjectives!

 
 

I don’t even want to imagine what a hip-hop version of the GOP would look like, although the first thing that popped into my head was Pat Boone singing “I’ll Still Kill” with 50 Cent.

Once again what was old is new again: the story of the republican party devolution

Ice, Ice, Baby indeedy

 
 

Mo’s Bike Shop said,
February 19, 2009 at 23:25

Shouldn’t they be spinning clockwise – you know, to the RIGHT?

Oh, wait, I get it – those are liberal fascist swastikas.

 
 

abba-dingo.com, fwiw.
Located on Alpha Ralpha Boulevard?

 
 

Had I been able to name our street at the time, it certainly would have been.

BYWP!!!!

 
 

SC, you might enjoy this (as might anyone else familair with the story ) : When I bought that domain I was self-employed , doing business as abba-dingo consulting. Heh heh.

 
 

Rusty –

Meghan McCain thinks that Republicans would be attracting more yung people, if they could just figure out how the whole intertubes thing works. This elicits the following reply:

JohnMcJunkin
While it’s not affiliated with the GOP, the #dontgo movement (www.dontgomovement.com) is a great example of conservatives and libertarians getting a strong handle on the use of the internet to promote grassroots activism. There’s also the brand new RFC Radio (www.rfcradio.com) which combines free-market, liberty-oriented thought with popular music and culture. The right won’t remain in the internet wilderness forever, and the Democrats deny that at their own peril.
11:43 am, Feb 19, 2009

Democrats, beware of the Twitter Revolution and right-wing radio at your peril!

 
 

They have a website, I tell you…a website! We’re doomed!

 
 

Michael Steele has signed his first act! Take a look

 
 

Mo’s Bike Shop said,

February 19, 2009 at 23:25

That is dripping with unadulterated AWESOME.

 
howsobamaworkingoutsofar?
 

You know what else is funny?

HIGH SCHOOL STUDENTS WHO SEE RIGHT THROUGH OBAMA’S B.S.

That’s what’s funny.

See Drudge for details.

 
 

Come on baby…don’t fear the Tweeter.

 
 

WIll this be discussed at CPAC or will it have its own PAC? I’m still thinking of sneaking into CPAC…..

 
Big Bad Bald Bastard
 

I’m still thinking of sneaking into CPAC

Lex, all it’ll take is a clipboard and an orange jumpsuit. You can get in anywhere like that.

 
Big Bad Bald Bastard
 

WIll this be discussed at CPAC or will it have its own PAC?

Steele is toying with the name CPAC Shakur.

 
 

Steele is toying with the name CPAC Shakur.

Win!

 
 

HIGH SCHOOL STUDENTS WHO SEE RIGHT THROUGH OBAMA’S B.S.

Must be thanks to those Malcolm X-Ray Specs they sell in the back of comic books.

 
 

Mmmmmm… high school boys! Yummers!

 
 

Troofus: You might want to look at the latest polls. In short: The public likes the stimulus. The public doesn’t like Congressional Republicans. You fail. Also, WRRROOOOOOORWWWWWOOO

 
 

A gold star for anyone who actually gets my name without looking it up. WRRROOOOOOOOOOO

 
 

I know what makes Amman’sor, believe you me!

 
Xecklothxayyquou Gilchrist
 

Santorum said he believes Muslims’ religious views cannot be changed or altered…

Wait. Does he mean Shiite Muslims, Sunni Muslims, hardliners, moderates, or liberals?

 
 

“Santorum said he believes Muslims’ religious views cannot be changed or altered…”

Wait. Does he mean Shiite Muslims, Sunni Muslims, hardliners, moderates, or liberals?

Makes no difference. They’re all part of the Great Islamic Menace.

 
 

It worked so well before, I wonder why they lost the election?

 
Xecklothxayyquou Gilchrist
 

Makes no difference. They’re all part of the Great Islamic Menace.

Indeed, but I was wondering how all those schisms happened if they can’t change their views.

 
 

So Santorum is asserting that muslims take their religion literally and are unfit to live in a functioning democracy because they will impose their own scripture-based morality on everyone else?
I got nothing.

 
 

Santorum said he believes Muslims’ religious views cannot be changed or altered…

Well, yes, I’d say. Otherwise they wouldn’t be Muslim anymore, would they?

 
 

Indeed, but I was wondering how all those schisms happened if they can’t change their views.

They’re CRAZY!!!

 
 

Heh. “Malcolm X-ray specs.” Good one.

 
 

Do it, liberals! I dare you! Google for “Muslim Rap Wave”!

 
 

Hey! I didn’t know Confederate Yankee Bob Owens had put out an album:

http://redeye.chicagotribune.com/red-worstalbumcovers-pg,0,1348740.photogallery?index=12

 
 

You know what else is funny?

HIGH SCHOOL STUDENTS WHO SEE RIGHT THROUGH OBAMA’S B.S.

That’s what’s funny. See Drudge for details.

The funniest part is that the school in question is full of conservatroids. But I’m sure there’s a reason Drudge wouldn’t mention that.

 
 

The fact is, liberal bias in the media is keeping you from seeing reality. Bernard Goldberg’s new book about you liberals drooling over Obsama nails you punks dead to rights, and exposes you as the MSM bias machine. We need conservative values, like the ones we have Here in the Heartland, reflected in the media or we will boycott.

 
 

nails you punks dead to rights,

I thought the GOP was punk?

 
 

True enough. In that case, who wants to go to CPAC with me?

 
 

Big Bad Bald Bastard said,
February 19, 2009 at 23:19

wins the thread.

 
 

or we will boycott.

by all means, help yourself. What you going to start with, the Intertoobz?

 
 

#

Lex (Agent of Chaos) Azagthoth said,

February 20, 2009 at 1:15 (kill)

True enough. In that case, who wants to go to CPAC with me?

Sorry, friend. I let my mohawk grow out like 25 years ago….

 
 

Bernard Goldberg has not come up with a single new trick since, oh, probably forever. Who the fuck even cared about him at CBS, in his supposedly “pre-turncoat” days?

Must every last one of you be losers, Gary?

 
Rusty Shackleford
 

I love the name of Goldberg’s new book: A Slobbering Love Affair: The True (And Pathetic) Story of the Torrid Romance Between Barack Obama and the Mainstream Media

I mean, no matter what your politics, what’s the point of buying the book after you’ve read the title?

 
 

Bernard Goldberg is still mad Dan Rather never asked him to The Prom. I read that first book ‘o butthurt he wrote, and it was the last book-lenghth conservative whine I bothered with. Every page, “What a crybaby. Maybe you just sucked, ya big titty-baby.”

And conservatives have just gotten worse since then.

 
 

You have to give him some credit in the pure selfishness department, however: he does seem to do pretty well for himself feeding the rubes the same “insider” shtick over and over and over again.

Fuck, he was doing this in 2001 when I was watching Fox News (did I mention I was insufferable in high school?). From the sounds of it he has just come up with new words for the same old crap.

 
 

Morning Joe didn’t think the original was racist nether did Pat Buchanan (SHOCKER), Joe also thinks that factory jobs building windmills will magically jump out his ass if he spews his right-wing crap all over my TV in the morning.
Forget overturning Free Trade to bring back factory work!!
Morning Joe has a magic anus that will fix America…………. (sigh)

 
 

The fact is, my magic anus will fix America. It is an anus of freedom.

 
 

Hey! I didn’t know Confederate Yankee Bob Owens had put out an album:

Don’t you see, it’s full of SMASH HITS! The sticker on the cover says so.

 
 

Meanwhile, elsewhere in the world via TPM.

More evidence in a new poll that the picture is not that simple. Congressional Democrats have a 48% – 45% approval. Not wildly good, but decent. Congressional Republicans are down at 33% – 59%, which is known in the public opinion field as “really, really bad.”

How soon until the Permanent Republican Majority is down to four states? Three? None? Gary? Trolls?

 
 

Do it, liberals! I dare you! Google for “Muslim Rap Wave”!

Oh, you may mock now, but why do you suppose the Dhimmis in the EMESSEM will only report this tragedy as the “Islamic Canola Wave”?

 
 

HIGH SCHOOL STUDENTS WHO SEE RIGHT THROUGH OBAMA’S B.S.

That’s what’s funny.

Is that what they’re yucking about in your trailer park tonight?

Shut up, minority.
.

 
 

Comin’ from the Institute
Hundred-dollar suit
I’m from Compton’s cityscapes
Where they wear bandanas and dollar bill capes
Lovin’ it like Dominique is lovin’ date-rapes
We stiff like Gary Cooper’s starched collars
In the projects, the Objectivists makin’ dollars
It ain’t a problem to get it there tomorrow
‘Cause I got a female mentor who ain’t never gonna borrow
Tell philosophy on one foot, got the IQ of a Rhodes scholar
If you follow Ayn Rand, shout out “A is A” — holla
To the gods and the earths, throw ya hands up in tandem
Or I’ll kick you to the curbs like ya name was Nate Branden
And if you’re sportin’ ice you know where to hand ’em
I study rational self-interest by design
Watch my game shine, my mentor’s name rhyme with ‘mine’
Like I got mine, you get your own and that’s fine
Not to mention I am Peikoff-christened on behalf
of Greenspan and Kelley as they’re rockin’ Pelle Pelles

 
 

Mister Leonard Pierce!!!!!

 
 

Oh, god. That is about six…thousand different kinds of awesome.

 
 

Or I’ll kick you to the curbs like ya name was Nate Branden

Heh.

 
 

Mister Mister Leonard Pierce!!

 
 

nails you punks dead to rights,

You know, we’re just not that into you.

Leonard Pierce said,

February 20, 2009

Just how many times can the internet be won in one thread?!!

 
 

:::swoons:::

 
 

by all means, help yourself. What you going to start with, the Intertoobz?

They apparently can’t even bring themselves to boycott liberal blogs…

 
Patriotic Trikey-Wike Force Central Command
 

ATTENTION, BRAVE REPUBLICAN CYBERSPACE WARRIORS!

BOYCOTT SADLY, NO!

 
 

BRAVE REPUBLICAN CYBERSPACE WARRIORS

Band name? Or something. This has to be used…somehow.

 
Big Bad Bald Bastard
 

Bravissimo, maestro Pierce.

 
 

A Slobbering Love Affair

Bernie Goldberg needs to kick his editor, his publicist, and his agent in the ass for letting a book go out with an ugly, off-putting title like that.

I mean, I’m sure it’s an ugly, off-putting book, but Jesus. Was the entire marketing department asleep that day? Did someone actually think a book with “slobbering” in the title was going to have any kind of shelf appeal?

 
 

That cartoon makes me twitchy. I know you’re making fun of it and all, but still…uncool.

I think it’s fucking genius.

 
 

Stunning. This is hands down, no doubt about it, the most clever example of taking their words/logic/depiction to use against them I’ve ever come across. Ever. Did I say ever?

Please please please promise to send the cartoon to every wingnut blog and website in existence. The response will be priceless.

 
 

The fact is, my magic anus will fix America. It is an anus of freedom.
The ‘magic anus’ is a movie cliche. I blame lazy scriptwriters.
I would be more impressed if it were an enormous, mendacious, disembodied anus.

 
 

Do it, liberals! I dare you! Google for “Muslim Rap Wave”!

The hilarious thing is that there actually are Islamist rappers (in addition to the more mundanely Muslim kind, who are typical of hip-hop in France and Germany) – there’s actually a workmanlike enough joint quoted in the Rotten Library by the name of ‘Dirty Kuffar’. It goes more or less exactly like you’d expect.

 
 

Bernie Goldberg needs to kick his editor, his publicist, and his agent in the ass for letting a book go out with an ugly, off-putting title like that.

They let Ann Coulter put her face on the covers of her books.

 
 

Bernie Goldberg needs to kick his editor, his publicist, and his agent in the ass for letting a book go out with an ugly, off-putting title like that.

I mean, I’m sure it’s an ugly, off-putting book, but Jesus. Was the entire marketing department asleep that day? Did someone actually think a book with “slobbering” in the title was going to have any kind of shelf appeal?

You think that’s bad? You have no idea what Goldberg’s editor has to put up with. One imagines every time he left the old fuck to his own devices, “B. O. Blackockus’ snuck in.

 
 

I can’t wait for the Islamic Rap(e) Wave to meet the enormous, mendacious, disembodied anus. Well, I can wait for a little while.

 
 

On Fox News, John Gibson says Eric Holder has a blue scrotum:

 
 

On Fox News, John Gibson says Eric Holder has a blue scrotum:

He can’t get no [satisfaction|blacks in traction|putrefaction|airport action|buttocks].

 
 

How did I not know?

(I know, some who are ignorant of history will object and say that Nazism and Fascism were Right-Wing movements. To them, I suggest they read Jonah Goldberg’s seminal book “Liberal Fascism” to learn the truth. The word Nazi was an acronym stemming from the German name for the National Socialist Party!)

Exclamation point!

 
 

the enormous, mendacious, disembodied anus

The Deadly Spiral!

 
 

On Fox News, John Gibson says Eric Holder has a blue scrotum:

Why, yes he does, right at the very end of that clip. But to imply that he meant anything of a racist nature by that remark just proves that liberals are the real racists.

 
 

I heeded the words of Suze Orman and now I’m a millionaire!

 
 

Somehow I knew that the magic troll words had been invoked. Prepare to scroll down past twenty-five of the next thirty comments, as conservative racist morons and their liberal enablers battle each other for supremacy on the interwebs.

 
 

commie, of course. How could I have been so blind. I must not have a sense of humor.

Not to mention that it’s a little bitty monkey, about 16 pounds (I think) and it’s only loose in the zoo, and the local news managed to report this story without once mentioning the color of its scrotum.

 
 

The word Nazi was an acronym stemming from the German name for the National Socialist Party!

GASP!!!

 
 

Leonard Pierce, you, sir, are a genius.

 
 

The word Nazi was an acronym stemming from the German name for the National Socialist Party!

Sheesh, they ALWAYS remember the National and the Socialist, and NEVER remember the PARTY.

 
 

Not to mention that it’s a little bitty monkey, about 16 pounds (I think) and it’s only loose in the zoo, and the local news managed to report this story without once mentioning the color of its scrotum.

FOX News – they distort, you deride.

 
 

Dear Cod, I had the Nazi/Socialist argument three years ago with a guy who is an idiot. Just because you call an eggplant a plum, doesn’t make it a member of the prunus family.

 
 

Sheesh, they ALWAYS remember the National and the Socialist, and NEVER remember the PARTY.

I think you mean Par-TAY.

 
 

Somehow I knew that the magic troll words had been invoked. Prepare to scroll down past twenty-five of the next thirty comments, as conservative racist morons and their liberal enablers battle each other for supremacy on the interwebs.

Well, obviously it’s vital to have the same discussion about a filthy money-grubbing self-hating media-controlling Jewess favoring the revolutionary Soviet client party over the revolutionary Chinese client party in Rhodeeeeejya, illustrating once and for all the peril in our unwitting betrayal of our race to B. O. Blackockus, the Saint Gandhi of liberal fascism, that we had several weeks ago (and that he’s been attempting to have, sometimes being indulged by a third party I leave nameless for decorum’s sake, ever since).

I like a good showboat, sir, but I’m not big on reruns.

 
 

Not to mention that it’s a little bitty monkey, about 16 pounds (I think) and it’s only loose in the zoo, and the local news managed to report this story without once mentioning the color of its scrotum.

FOX News – they distort, you deride.

To only slightly paraphrase Al Franken, ‘Smorty smort blart deblort’.

 
 

Help, I’m being repressed! Oh, what a giveaway! Did you hear that? Did you hear that, eh? That’s what I’m on about!

 
 

Dear Cod, I had the Nazi/Socialist argument three years ago with a guy who is an idiot. Just because you call an eggplant a plum, doesn’t make it a member of the prunus family.

One might in fact ask proponents of this asinine folderol whether, by the same logic, the People’s Republic of China is more Republican than we are. (The answer these days is ‘yes’, but…)

 
Xecklothxayyquou Gilchrist
 

One might in fact ask proponents of this asinine folderol whether, by the same logic, the People’s Republic of China is more Republican than we are.

Last time this argument was fashionable, there was the Republican Guard.

 
 

Righteous Bubba said,
February 20, 2009 at 3:04

How did I not know?

That photo of Endre and his wife is lovely. And did you know that as a classical violinist he has won widespread acclaim for his photography?

 
 

Who is Endre Balogh (hmm, sounds like a furriner), and why is he holding that violin?

Certainly, George Orwell had Marx in mind when he famously quipped, “There are some ideas so preposterous that only an intellectual could believe them.”
http://bighollywood.breitbart.com/ebalogh/2009/02/19/opm-the-socialist-drug-of-choice/

That may have come as a surprise to Orwell, however:

In his 1938 essay, “Why I joined the Independent Labour Party”, published in the ILP-affiliated New Leader, Orwell wrote “For some years past I have managed to make the capitalist class pay me several pounds a week for writing books against capitalism. But I do not delude myself that this state of affairs is going to last forever”,[63] going on to add “the only régime which, in the long run, will dare to permit freedom of speech is a Socialist régime. If Fascism triumphs I am finished as a writer – that is to say, finished in my only effective capacity. That of itself would be a sufficient reason for joining a Socialist party.”[63] And towards the end of the essay, “I do not mean I have lost all faith in the Labour Party. My most earnest hope is that the Labour Party will win a clear majority in the next General Election.”[64]

He was later to add, in “Why I Write” (1946), “Every line of serious work that I have written since 1936 has been written, directly or indirectly, against totalitarianism and for democratic socialism, as I understand it.”[65]

“My recent novel [1984] is NOT intended as an attack on Socialism or on the British Labour Party (of which I am a supporter) but as a show-up of the perversions … which have already been partly realized in Communism and Fascism. …The scene of the book is laid in Britain in order to emphasize that the English-speaking races are not innately better than anyone else and that totalitarianism, if not fought against, could triumph anywhere.”
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/George_Orwell

 
 

And of course the notoriously democratic AND republican Deutsche Demokratische Republik.

 
 

Ah, he’s a violinist/photographer. That explains…wait, what?

 
 

His photos are prominently displayed in the collections of several connoisseurs of fine photographic arts. In 2007, a solo exhibition of 47 of his photos ran for three months at the Karpeles Museum in Santa Barbara. His photo “Egg On Glass” was chosen from nearly 3000 entries from 40 countries to be displayed among 87 others in the prestigious “Art of Digital” International Exhibition – 2007.

Fucking elitist.

 
 

Memo to Endre Balogh:

If left to the mercies of the free market, there wouldn’t be a classical violinist alive in the world today.

In 2004, after severely curtailing his touring concert schedule in order to spend more time with his children…

Because his wife ran off with a Marxist? A big, black rapping Marxist with a major label contract?

 
 

Apropos of nothing, Leonard Nimoy does remarkably tasteful nude photography.

 
 

Because his wife ran off with a Marxist? A big, black rapping Marxist with a major label contract?

And a diamond and platinum violin.

 
 

Enormous mendacious disembodied anus

Ah, yes. IIRC, it’s sung to the tune of the Beach Boys’ Kokomo.

 
 

Well, I must admit I’ve had some cosmetic surgery.

 
 

I had the Nazi/Socialist argument three years ago with a guy who is an idiot. Just because you call an eggplant a plum, doesn’t make it a member of the prunus family.

With respect to the right wing, you’re dealing with people who claim that because eggplant has the word ‘egg’ in it, it was laid by a chicken.

 
 

sung to the tune of the Beach Boys’ Kokomo.

Jennifer, you’ve just ruined my evening. But in a good way.

 
 

sung to the tune of the Beach Boys’ Kokomo.

Thank goodness I am home alone or I would have to explain what was so funny.

 
 

In 2007, a solo exhibition of 47 of his photos ran for three months at the Karpeles Museum in Santa Barbara. His photo “Egg On Glass” was chosen from nearly 3000 entries from 40 countries to be displayed among 87 others in the prestigious “Art of Digital” International Exhibition – 2007.

I certainly hope neither of those received any GOVERNMENT funds!

 
 

Oh, it’s not mine. The Editors came up with the whole Kokomo thing years ago. I’d link it but they lost their old archives when they shut down for a few months a couple of years ago.

But damn, it’s funny as hell, which is why I still remember it.

 
 

Check out the front page of Big Hollywood and examine the comment total for Mike Long’s post and the comment totals for other posts and see if you can figure out what’s going on. Myself, I blame a crammed intertube.

 
 

enormous mendacious disembodied anus

WE DEMAND TO KNOW THE REST OF THE LYRICS

 
 

Certainly, George Orwell had Marx in mind when he famously quipped, “There are some ideas so preposterous that only an intellectual could believe them.”

The Great Gazoogle is unable to provide an actual source for this alleged famous quip, which appears to be passed from hand to hand around the right blogosphere like a [insert suitably repugnant simile here], usually attributed to Orwell but sometimes to H. G. Wells.
Myth busted!

sung to the tune of the Beach Boys’ Kokomo.
Must credit Teh Editors!

 
 

But damn, it’s funny as hell, which is why I still remember it.

I have mentioned, haven’t I, that I am aware of all internet traditions™?

 
 

Most of The Editors’ old stuff can be found in The Wayback Machine at archive.org.

 
 

Thank Dog for teh Googlez:

Enormous, mendacious, disembodied anus
You rectum, fifth column, objectively pro-Saddam
Half-Swedish, pro-moorish, deceptive chocolate starfish
On the internets
There are lying assholes
And they say I said all these things I never said at all
Dead body in the sand
If his mom don’t like it she’s a “media whore”
Hey don’t you dare get mad
It’s just a metaphor!
You lying asshole
CHORUS
Ooo I really hate those lying assholes
They say I’m all talk
Because I won’t go to the recruiter
That’s cuz I’m fighting on my computer!
Lying assholes
Nine eleven, a little slice of heaven
Guantanimo Bay
Is a luxurious get-away
Eat lemon chicken in the Sun all day
They call me a wingnut
Because my party bashes faggots
I’ve got an answer for that:
Michael Moore is fat
Lying asshole
CHORUS

 
 

insert suitably repugnant simile here

This is what is commonly known as a “challenge”.

 
 

insert suitably repugnant simile here

Hepatitis!

 
 

Certainly, George Orwell had Marx in mind when he famously quipped, “There are some ideas so preposterous that only an intellectual could believe them.”

Google provides no source nor proof. One site claims it for Paul Fussell, but I can’t find any support for that either. So, I’m calling shenanigans.

 
 

Did someone actually think a book with “slobbering” in the title was going to have any kind of shelf appeal?

A video on the other hand…

 
 

Well, how do: Some ideas are so stupid that only intellectuals could believe them.
Michael Levine, Lessons at the Midway Point: Lessons for Life
(Berkeley: Celestial Arts, 1995)

 
 

Has Jammies-Off-by-9-inches reacted to this shoe on the other foot? How’s the fit? I’d like to see that.

 
 

The Google-Fu is strong with tigrismus.

 
 

enormous, mendacious, disembodied anus

You can sing that to ‘Kokomo’, y’know that?

*runs away*

 
 

There seem to be variants of the Orwell apocryphon, with ‘absurd’ or ‘ridiculous’ etc., so one can reconstruct a trail of which right-wing blogger has plagiarised whom (like stemmatology with the transcription errors in mediaeval manuscripts). But ‘preposterous’ looks to be the favourite variant.

 
 

-1 on this post. I usually laugh my ass off at your work, and everyone else’s on the site, but that’s not cool. And ‘but…they did it fiiiiirst’ is a Malkinite defense not worthy of the fine denizens of this blerg.

Rant off. Hugs and kisses and all is forgiven.

Now get back to making me laugh!

dectia

 
 

The Economist has an article on “Alt-A” mortgages, as staggeringly toxic as sub-prime.

“Alt-A” mortgages [were] offered to borrowers sandwiched between subprime and prime. This market was trumpeted as a means of extending home ownership to those, such as the self-employed, with a reasonable credit standing but unsteady income. Its practitioners specialised in loans with scant documentation and exotica such as negative-amortisation mortgages, which allow borrowers to pay less than the accrued interest, with the difference added to the loan balance.

That Alt-A has troubles comes as no surprise. Last summer, for instance, it helped to bring down IndyMac, a Californian bank. But the speed with which loans have soured in recent months, and the reaction of rating agencies, have been startling. Delinquencies rocketed in the final months of 2008. They even rose sharply for loans made in 2005, before underwriting turned really sloppy (see chart).

The rating agencies are rushing to catch up with this grim reality. Moody’s, which last summer had issued a sanguine outlook for Alt-A, recently quadrupled its loss projections on bonds backed by such loans. A steady flow of downgrades has turned into a flood in recent weeks, with thousands of Alt-A tranches taking the plunge. The falls have been unusually steep: of the $59 billion of AAA-rated securities that Moody’s cut between January 29th and February 2nd, an astonishing 91% went straight to junk, according to Laurie Goodman of Amherst Securities. In ratings terms, Alt-A is doing worse than subprime.

[…]

Rotten as Alt-A loans are, worse may be to come. As unemployment in America heads towards 8%, even strongly underwritten loans will go bad. Bankers are growing increasingly anxious about the $1.1 trillion of prime mortgage loans and securities, much of which they held on to themselves, assuming it to be bombproof. This sits on their books at “much more optimistic” values than lower-grade mortgages, says one. Some 70% of prime securities will eventually have their ratings cut, according to a “downgrade-o-meter” produced by JPMorgan Chase. As Guy Cecala of Inside Mortgage Finance, a newsletter, puts it: “The mortgage storm’s first wave was subprime. Now we are being buffeted by Alt-A. But a bigger wave is on the horizon, and it cuts across all loan types.”

 
 

As Mark Twain Winston Churchill George Orwell famously said, “A mis-attributed quotation will be halfway around the right blogosphere before the truth has finished trolling has a chance to put its boots on.”

 
 

Certainly, George Orwell had Marx in mind when he famously quipped, “There are some ideas so preposterous that only an intellectual could believe them.”

The Great Gazoogle is unable to provide an actual source for this alleged famous quip, which appears to be passed from hand to hand around the right blogosphere like a [insert suitably repugnant simile here], usually attributed to Orwell but sometimes to H. G. Wells.
Myth busted!

This is more like the Stalin ‘quote’ about one death versus a million than the Fitzgerald ‘quote’ in which his breathless fellatio of the wealthy is shot down by Hemingway; while it’s doubtless not genuine (and it can be traced in the manner described from musculars to freepers to decents and so on), it gives a more or less correct impression of what Orwell thought. He was profoundly anti-intellectual, and the unifying thread of his praxis was basically Maoist – that socialism’s biggest problem was too much input from eggheads and not enough from the common man.

Contrary to popular delusion, however, he did not believe the common man to be Joe the Plumber. Populism in 21st-century America usually strongly implies a sort of deeply mannered reactionary aspiration and scapegoating; in the day and age when torpedoing the right to strike was a viable political idea, it was neither reasonable to misinterpret the common man’s desire as petit-bourgeois nor fashionable for the economic or political right to consider the popular opinion worth consulting even in theory.

 
 

I think every wingnut ever has used that mis-quotation. It seems to be like some sort of fucking secret handshake for them. I googled it for the sheer helluvit and sweet jeezus – there were a ton of them.

 
 

You scoundrel, that was TOTALLY G.K. Chesterton and you know it!

 
 

Bureaucracy is the price we pay for impartiality.

 
 

All of us are in the gutter, but some of us are looking up skirts.

 
 

“There are some ideas so preposterous that only an intellectual could believe them.”

I know, right? Who needed that wig-wearing faggot Newton to write about his magic invisible “gravity” bullshit? All kindsa damn people figgered out that shit fell. Fucking “intellectuals” and their thinky think shit.

 
 

Who wrote the disembodied anus song?

 
Friedrich Nietzsche
 

That which fails to kill me, usually gives me a terrible hangover.

 
 

Why not track what is happening with the budget and where the money from the “stimulus” is going?

Oh.. I forgot that money is going to ACORN and birth control, and other very important job creators that Pelosi, Reid and Obambi are paying back for their high posts.

What an embarrassment this liberal administration has proven to be.
More troops to Afghanastan, I still have to pay my mortgage and car payment. Prices going up, trillions in pork.

What Idiots voted for this kind of change??

 
 

” Michael Levine (1954?-)
Lessons at the Halfway Point – US author, executive of Levine Communications Office—respected public relations firm. ”

So their totem quote is from a little book of Reader’s Digest-style aphorisms published in ’94 by a PR exec to celebrate his midlife crisis. This is so deliciously sweet I may get the diabeetus.

 
 

Who wrote the disembodied anus song?

The Editors

 
 

Populism in 21st-century America usually strongly implies a sort of deeply mannered reactionary aspiration and scapegoating; in the day and age when torpedoing the right to strike was a viable political idea, it was neither reasonable to misinterpret the common man’s desire as petit-bourgeois nor fashionable for the economic or political right to consider the popular opinion worth consulting even in theory.

Do you mean Jennings-Bryan and the sort of homespun populism of the early 20th Century, or the more muscular Jacksonian kind?

 
 

Why not track what is happening with the budget and where the money from the “stimulus” is going?

Oh.. I forgot that money is going to ACORN and birth control, and other very important job creators that Pelosi, Reid and Obambi are paying back for their high posts.

What an embarrassment this liberal administration has proven to be.
More troops to Afghanastan, I still have to pay my mortgage and car payment. Prices going up, trillions in pork.

What Idiots voted for this kind of change ??

 
 

Do you mean Jennings-Bryan and the sort of homespun populism of the early 20th Century, or the more muscular Jacksonian kind?

Bryan coopted deliberate inflation and public railroads, and he was about as far right as any kind of populism which wasn’t completely empty got. And my understanding is that in Orwell’s time the Tories made no bones about holding the vulgar mob in contempt.

 
 

*runs into Jennifer*

d’Oh.

 
 

“It will be avant garde, technically,” he said. “It will come to table with things that will surprise everyone – off the hook.”

Does that mean cutting-edge?

“I don’t do ‘cutting-edge,’ “ he said. “That’s what Democrats are doing. We’re going beyond cutting-edge.”

Watch it, hon. You’re gonna cut yourself with that razor-sharp wit if you don’t handle it carefully.

 
 

S,N! is like a stream of bat pee in a cave.
Tigrismus said it!

 
 

Why not track what is happening with the budget and where the money from the “stimulus” is going?

Oh.. I forgot that money is going to ACORN and birth control, and other very important job creators that Pelosi, Reid and Obambi are paying back for their high posts.

What an embarrassment this liberal administration has proven to be.
More troops to Afghanastan, I still have to pay my mortgage and car payment. Prices going up, trillions in pork.

What Idiots voted for this kind of change??

 
 

OPM – The Socialist Drug of Choice

What does it say about the state of my head space when I was certain OPM stood for “Obama Praise Monkeys.” Bye bye now.

 
 

Sorry, I’ll get off it, I found it very funny.

 
 

It went like this: Someone called Cindy Sheehan a media whore, and The Editors made fun of it, and someone got mad and called The Editors “lying assholes”. His thrust was that because he didn’t literally accuse her of sex for cash he didn’t actually call her a whore.

In a post deconstructing his objections, The Editors noted that they really didn’t get called a “lying asshole”, because he wasn’t literally making an accusation that a lying, mendacious, disenbodied anus was making these charges against him.

A commenter noted the Kokomo feel to the phrase, and the rest is internet traditions.

 
 

I wasn’t aware that Soulja Boy trolled left-wing blogs.

 
 

Gavin, if you’re still around—

Is the troll setting his nym to “|” or is that being done by a WordPress plugin?

 
 

S,N! is like a stream of bat pee in a cave.

You left of the most most important bit! “We’re only fouling ourselves, but at least it’s warm”

 
 

From that Amazon link:

35 used & new from $0.01

Pretty much.

 
 

The Editors are not a group I have familiarized myself with.

 
 

Oh, shit. He’s doing that, cuz you can’t killfile the seperator character.

Fuckfuckfuckfuckfuck.

 
 

We’re going beyond cutting-edge.

They’re into handle territory?

 
 

The Editors sort of = http://thepoorman.net/

 
 

Oh, shit. He’s doing that, cuz you can’t killfile the seperator character.

Fuckfuckfuckfuckfuck.

I’ll let Djur know. There should be a way to specially kill it (or any other special characters) separately .

 
 

Bryan coopted deliberate inflation and public railroads, and he was about as far right as any kind of populism which wasn’t completely empty got. And my understanding is that in Orwell’s time the Tories made no bones about holding the vulgar mob in contempt.

Bryan coopted deliberate inflation in the sense that he ran out in front of the Free Silver movement? I’m trying to understand these mass movements better — the ones that came in succession from about the 1840s to about WWII.

 
 

Gavin, if you’re still around—

Is the troll setting his nym to “|” or is that being done by a WordPress plugin?

Oh, it’s not WordPress, so it must be Der Troll.

 
 

Hip hop? But won’t that throw everyone who attended the GOP Convention aka Heaven’s Waiting Room into cardiac arrest? Can the GOP afford to actually lose that many people?

 
 

Pipes (this thing | ) are tricky to deal with, I’d be careful throwing that in a killfile. The SQL server is almost certainly some flavor of unix and pipes are powerful characters.

 
 

In the future, any freshly-coined epigrams that bolster the author’s point will be given a sheen of rectal mucus truthiness by attributing them to Gary Ruppert.

 
 

Forget I said that, it shouldn’t matter.

 
 

Actually, it’s one of the trolls, but not necessarily the one who disappeared from the thread below when I asked him how best to deal with the current overtrolling problem.

 
 

the greasemonkey killfiles don;t seem to be broken by the |.

 
 

Forget I said that, it shouldn’t matter.

Yeah, but the troll’s intentions sure as hell matter. He’s basically trying to fuck with people’s computers now, and with various servers (Djur’s killfile, the S,N! server).

 
 

the greasemonkey killfiles don;t seem to be broken by the |.

You’re right. I overreacted a bit because when I clicked on “kill” the message that popped up had no name in it, making me think it would remove all the comments or something.

 
 

Bryan coopted deliberate inflation in the sense that he ran out in front of the Free Silver movement?

Deliberate inflation was the implicit (and, out west, explicit) aim of Free Silver. While ostensibly the ridiculous exchange rate would allow for the liberalization of banking (it was assumed that the gold supply was fairly fixed, while silver was still very actively being mined), essentially everyone who owned real property without having any meaningful way to exploit it for rent had to rely on its value as a seizable asset – meaning that the considerable inflation in the heavily overvalued exchange rate for the then-gold-backed dollar would seriously benefit mortgagers at the expense of creditors and salaried workers.

Mind you, this was in the middle of a huge deflationary trend. And both the Populists and the silverite Democrats sought, in one form of another, more extensive public ownership of railroads and other infrastructure and the use of income tax to produce state revenue. Lots of practical, historical stuff. And it did have a heavy religious overtone – evangelical Christianity was much more positivist at the time.

 
 

Where is the Statue of Liberty with her face and hands ripped off?

 
 

Any troll that prevents a reader’s ability to stop seeing his text needs a sbanking.

 
 

The ‘|’ nym does fool the pie-filter script (which treats it as a wild-card).
As Gary Ruppert famously quipped.

 
 

Yeah, but the troll’s intentions sure as hell matter. He’s basically trying to fuck with people’s computers now, and with various servers (Djur’s killfile, the S,N! server).

Well, I ought to try this one more time.

Mr. Troll-With-The-Pipe-Character,

As a troll, I’m hoping you can bring some insight to this question. How best should this overtrolling problem be handled?

I ask because moderating or banning people and their comments is generally not how we like to do things here.

Thanks.

 
 

“As a troll, I’m hoping you can bring some insight to this question. How best should this overtrolling problem be handled?”

Well, hell, if you don’t wanna do that you just gotta deal.

A free society is the price we pay for a little insecurity, and some trollin’ problems is the price of a free forum. Get it?

 
 

I think just a little trollin’ gives this site character. Much like the occasional Klan parade, sanctioned by local authorities, makes the USA different from Europe.

 
 

Also, precisely because introducing silver as mintable at whatever fraction of the value of gold the particular candidates asked for – at least 1/20 (which would be half again its value) and as much as 1/8 (which would probably have resulted in enough inflation to seriously change the course of American history) – would do so much to weaken the banks’ stranglehold over rural America, the incidental Republican hostility to free-silver resulted in an unprecedented movement of capitalists as a class to support the GOP. Even Wilson, who was openly hostile to the remaining silverites, had to face a divided Republican Party to win the Presidency – and after the failure of the Bull Moose Party to actually capture meaningful non-Presidential success, the remaining Republicans would live or die by their ability to suck up to Eastern bankers.

 
 

Also, I’d suggest the hateful wops responsible for S,N! consult with Djur and/or someone who knows Greasemonkey’s limitations and put a name ban on anything which can’t be killfiled. Banning the scroll-troll is pointless, but that doesn’t mean they oughta have methods handed to them to screw with people with low bandwidth.

 
 

If you want to be a smarmy prick, Gavin could always just post your IP address and let nature take it’s course.

 
 

| is now in my killfile. Sadly, I will not be able to see his insights anymore.

 
 

Deliberate inflation was the implicit (and, out west, explicit) aim of Free Silver. While ostensibly the ridiculous exchange rate would allow for the liberalization of banking (it was assumed that the gold supply was fairly fixed, while silver was still very actively being mined), essentially everyone who owned real property without having any meaningful way to exploit it for rent had to rely on its value as a seizable asset – meaning that the considerable inflation in the heavily overvalued exchange rate for the then-gold-backed dollar would seriously benefit mortgagers at the expense of creditors and salaried workers.

See, I was imagining it as a boon to wage earners at the expense of those whose income came from investment returns. That was the essential populist appeal of free silver, though, wasn’t it? I mean, besides the other things that sort of got payloaded in under the ‘free silver’ banner?

Mind you, this was in the middle of a huge deflationary trend. And both the Populists and the silverite Democrats sought, in one form of another, more extensive public ownership of railroads and other infrastructure and the use of income tax to produce state revenue. Lots of practical, historical stuff. And it did have a heavy religious overtone – evangelical Christianity was much more positivist at the time.

Anti-Catholicism? Was Bryan’s chautauqua movement stoking public paranoia about the Vatican at all?

Maybe these are silly questions for their simplicity.

 
 

Well, hell, if you don’t wanna do that you just gotta deal.

A free society is the price we pay for a little insecurity, and some trollin’ problems is the price of a free forum. Get it?

Welp, that’s that then.

 
 

Djur’s magic RSS will take hexadecimal.

 
 

enormous mendacious disembodied anus

I realize that the thread has moved far beyond the post where I copied these words,
and this is probably O/T and ignorable,

but could this possibly refer to Karl Rove?

 
 

Anti-Catholicism? Was Bryan’s chautauqua movement stoking public paranoia about the Vatican at all?

Yup. ‘Positivist’ and ‘positive’ aren’t synonyms – they were the party of progress, and one element of that progress was the destruction of the instruments of backwards Papist indoctrination.

See, I was imagining it as a boon to wage earners at the expense of those whose income came from investment returns. That was the essential populist appeal of free silver, though, wasn’t it? I mean, besides the other things that sort of got payloaded in under the ‘free silver’ banner?

To some extent the essential appeal was in fact kicking the wealthy in the stones, but the primary objective was always improving the station of the public. Thus the heavy support for public rail – something which had, in the last 30 years, moved more public money into richer hands than anything in prior American history. (See ‘Credit Mobilier’ and ‘Grant Administration, well-deserved historiographic contempt of’.) Part of the appeal was also in liberalizing specie – paper money wasn’t quite regarded as worthless, but was definitely understood to be much less valuable than specie. The way the mint worked at the time was essentially by trade-in, and the use of gold alone in minting made greenbacks relatively infungible – you might, maybe, be able to buy enough gold to mint a dollar for $5. On the other hand, the same in silver even in the 1:20 regime would be more like $2.50.

 
 

Djur’s magic RSS will take hexadecimal.

Is that the usual HTML escape codes? Eg. &nnn;?

Welp, that’s that then.

…that works too.

 
 

Or it’s actually &#nnn; I think, but how are you entering those codes, RB?

 
 

Also, there’s a very slight vestige of Whiggism at work in evangelical positivism in that period, but nonetheless it’s worth looking up the role of Whig ideology in mass politics. I don’t believe I’ve linked the article yet, so here is Adam Cadre’s summary of The Political Culture of the American Whigs – it makes a fascinating read, especially because of how Goddamn inscrutable the whigs are in modern terms.

 
Some Random Idiot
 

Simba B said,

February 20, 2009 at 2:32

BRAVE REPUBLICAN CYBERSPACE WARRIORS

Band name? Or something. This has to be used…somehow.

I vote for badly translated Anime title.

 
 

Is that the usual HTML escape codes? Eg. &nnn;?

Computer change; forget what I did on the other one but it was hex for a smart-quote when there was some Tintin namestealing.

 
 

You would have to add ‘unctuous’ to the line to refer to Trudblossom.

 
 

Oh, and a major influence on the 1896 campaign particularly but the Silverites’ peculiar temporal spread generally is something that hadn’t happened yet: the Klondike gold rush, which Americans wouldn’t find out about until 1897 and wouldn’t start exploiting for another year. The last large discovery of gold was in the Black Hills (thus the destruction of the Sioux) – and that was twenty years ago. Outside of small discoveries in Colorado and B.C., the nearest anyone had found unexploited gold recently was the Southern Cone and the Boer veldt. It seemed a reasonable assumption at the time that most of the gold which would be acquired by Americans in the voters’ lifetimes was already in the hands of the banks and financiers.

 
 

Oh, now that’s an article I’m grateful to read. A common contemporary take on both the Whigs and Free Silverism is that they were all weird and contingent, and that there’s no understanding them without an expert familiarity with their context.

I think I understand the enthusiasm of Free Silverism, but the argument behind it is just all over the place — an analogue, it sort of seemed, to the almost willfully boring, layer-upon-layer complexity of the right’s postwar conspiracy thinking. The Dan Smoot stuff, if you’re familiar. Impossible to follow, gigantically influential.

Thanks for the article! Would, actually, you have any idea where to get a good bibliography on the Know-Nothings?

 
 

Thanks for the article! Would, actually, you have any idea where to get a good bibliography on the Know-Nothings?

I’m afraid not, although I’ve always been more or less content to pigeonhole them as regular nativists. To the extent they’re interesting at all it’s for what Cadre cites – an emphasis on internal improvement to the exclusion of engagement with the outside world. More commerce and less trade, a distinction which modern politics doesn’t really accept.

Outside of that, all I know is that they were at least in part a product of (a) the attempts by the first generation to establish a native aristocracy foundering, resulting in fairly weak and largely plutocratic qualifications for membership in polite society and (b) a relatively large amount of Irish immigration, which unlike prior Papist surges (Portuguese, mainly, but to some extent also Poles) roused the traditional contempt of Anglo protestants pretty fiercely.

There are probably good histories of the Know-Nothings out there, but my gut tells me there just isn’t that much to learn about them – kind of like most secret societies, they’re much more exciting-sounding than they actually are.

 
 

Computer change; forget what I did on the other one but it was hex for a smart-quote when there was some Tintin namestealing.

Or to be clearer just percentage7C. The Sadly RSS feed seems a little kooky now so no testy.

 
 

Anyway thanks once more Gavin and for the fine work apart from corralling unruly monkeys.

 
 

So why is Obama adding troops to Afghanistan even thoug he ran as the “anti-war” candidate? Seems like he is a fraud to me.

Didn’t he learn anything from what happened to the Soviets there?

 
 

Oh, and there’s also classism! Before the 1840s, immigrants were largely either wealthy or eager ideologues; lots of nationalists and republicans, not too many desperate poor laborers. In and after the 40s, however, the ideologues were much more Marxian and the wealth-seekers were much closer to the brink of starvation. Between the normal hate and fear of the mob by the wealthy few in a pre-Keynesian society and the quite reasonable fear jobbers had of workers whose primary motivation was food, a cottage industry in hate and fear of immigrants developed almost overnight. The one set of formative developments beyond that, I believe, would be the uprisings and agitation by Anglo settlers in Mexico and maybe possibly the Upper and Lower Canada Revolts and the Oregon question – things which pressed the idea of Anglophony as a useful prerequisite to Americanhood. (The loser in the first competitive race for President of Texas was a Hispanophone, and the US came close to using German as a second language officially early on – the single thing that probably wouldn’t have been predictable from 1790 that the Know-Nothings gave our modern nativists is the focus on the English language as a pseudo-racial token of identity.)

 
 

I tip my toque at Saint Jesus.

 
the guy in the Cubs hat who was shy
 

I am indeed saddened by these recent developments in Post-Land.

This unfortunate misinterpretation of what is meant to be a post-partisan, indeed, almost antinomian cartoon is clearly the kind of knee-jerk response one should expect from the crowing Obamaphiles (in that post-modern, soi disant sense so favored by so-called “élites”) [wiggles fingers worn out by making air-quotes].

The monkey in the cartoon is clearly meant to portray the Post’s very own John Podhoretz. Having known JPod in college, where his (lack of) table manners and gargantuan appetite had already marked him for a career as a cultural bellwether, not to mention his hirsute body, which I was unfirtunately exposed to in the communal Burton-Judson shower, the comparison is obvious to me.

This left-inspired trumpery is just the kind of aesthetically obtuse gloss that will cost the preening sluice-mongers of miscegenation dearly. The fact is, the new Republican Party, with it’s Hippity-Hoppin’, Jello-Puddin’ Pops, Palin-on-snow-machines Hard Chargin’ will leave y’all wonderin’ about the true Maverick-ness, you betcha!

The Post is willing to make fun of its most worthy intellectual light, and you libs can’t even see the ploy until it is pointed out!

The fact is, NoBama will fail, and the Steele and JPod will be Ice Ice Babay on y’all befo’ yo’ kin’s tell ol’ Bre’re Rabbit not to touch dat ol’ Tar Babay, Yassuh!

Peace, out… or, uh, standing athwart… em, as you were.

 
 

There are probably good histories of the Know-Nothings out there, but my gut tells me there just isn’t that much to learn about them – kind of like most secret societies, they’re much more exciting-sounding than they actually are.

They actually seem to epitomize a certain paranoid, emotionally-driven Americanism that makes sense, at least to me, as part of a historical continuum that leads to the Goldwater movement. Not Barry Goldwater himself, or necessarily his people, but the assemblage that formed around them, incl. the Birchers, John Stormer, and a lot of names that are less familiar now.

I think they’re proto-wingnuts, basically, and that the secret-society aspects of it all were kind of comme il faut in those days of Masonry and Anti-Masonry. I mean, I suspect it’s not the hermeticism that’s the essential quality of their success.

 
 

| said,

February 20, 2009 at 5:02

I think revel in my fear and ignorance…

repaired

 
 

Anyway thanks once more Gavin and for the fine work apart from corralling unruly monkeys.

Thanks! My pleasure, and it’s a pleasure that you’re here as well.

 
 

I mean, I suspect it’s not the hermeticism that’s the essential quality of their success.

I’d argue it’s the main reason we remember them, though – outside of the immigration politics, I’ve never been given the impression they’re remarkably different from any other secret society, at most a little more Whig-flavored than most nativists. And their influence is dramatically overstated both by early political intermarriage with Republicans and the terrible rep secret societies left Reconstruction with. It’s the rough equivalent of an observer 200 years ago trying to determine the nature and influence of the Wingnut Party. Nine times out of ten, supposed cases of Know-Nothing continuity are just political slanders which have lost their meaning.

 
 

We are happy to have been had.

 
Leon Trotsky, Exile-in-Mexico
 

Greetings, my young parsons. Michael Steele is, as they say in the youthful Colored vulgarate, in the, let me see if I’ve got this written down… yes.

Michael is in the hiz-zouse.

Yes.

Hiz-zouse.

Well?

Will you vote for us now?

I’m meeting you half-way, you damned dirty urban hippies. Don’t be inconsiderate.

 
 

Can we have the poop jokes back? Where are the poop jokes?

 
 

Can we have the poop jokes back? Where are the poop jokes?

Up your butt and around the shit moat.

 
 

Nine times out of ten, supposed cases of Know-Nothing continuity are just political slanders which have lost their meaning.

I think there’s a difference in the way we’re measuring them. Instead of as a political party, the American Party and so forth, I’m trying to look at them in terms of the emotional pull the movement exerted on the really considerable number of Americans who took part in it.

In those terms, I guess you could say that all populism is basically the same, and that all secret societies operate along similar lines, but there’s something about the thrillseeking, anarchic quality of the Know-Nothings that. . .ok, you know how European fascism needed always to keep moving in order to remain viable, needed to privilege action and conflict in order to maintain a high emotional pitch. That’s the kind of restless, irrationalist (as opposed to ‘anti-intellectual’) quality I think I’m seeing. Or is that totally different from your impression?

 
Enraged Bull Limpet
 

Hours later, I return to see that two strikethroughs — which appeared functional in preview — are absent from from my published comment, thus rendering it nonsensical. Whatcha gotta do to make the strike stick around here?

 
Enraged Bull Limpet
 

“From from?” Dammit, good thing this one’s almost dead… not my day.

 
 

If this works it’s just “strike” and not the longer version.

 
 

The face of the new Republican party.

It’s hard to discern the face for the low rent bling. I see the atrocious taste of the old Republican party still holds.

 
 

In those terms, I guess you could say that all populism is basically the same, and that all secret societies operate along similar lines, but there’s something about the thrillseeking, anarchic quality of the Know-Nothings that. . .ok, you know how European fascism needed always to keep moving in order to remain viable, needed to privilege action and conflict in order to maintain a high emotional pitch. That’s the kind of restless, irrationalist (as opposed to ‘anti-intellectual’) quality I think I’m seeing. Or is that totally different from your impression?

I suppose you’re right, although it’s worth stressing that the analogy works better than you noticed: fascist movements without strong and politically astute leadership tend to go any way congenial to their membership at the time. Thus the seemingly impossible task of reconciling the political careers of Fremont and Lincoln with their early KN association. Even the emphasis on ‘action’ wasn’t a universal trait.

And if you read Orcinus you know a lot more about American nativism than you could likely learn from studying the Know-Nothings – the second Klan is basically its ideological Adam, taking in all the issues nativists now adopt and promoting all the exegeses they now take for granted. To whatever extent the American Party has a lasting influence, it’s through those among their Southern members who, after the war, founded paramiltaries and left their mark on history in emigrant, immigrant, and freedman blood. The second Klan is where it all starts for us.

(And if you haven’t read Orcinus on the subject, here is where Google first tells me to start. It’s what he does, and he does it well.)

 
Enraged Bull Limpet
 

Testing testing bl–rt normal

 
 

Rage rage against the trying of the strike.

 
 

I actually sent Sara Robinson the dirty bomb story soon after it broke, and was surprised not to see it there. The SPLC picked it up that day or the next, and there it remains, give or take a few references and oblique posts.

Yeah, I certainly do follow Niewert. I don’t agree with his eliminationist focus a lot of the time, but things seem to be much more like that than they were, week by week.

 
Enraged Bull Limpet
 

Just for the compulsive record:

Newly elected Republican National Committee Chairman Michael S. Steele plans an “off the hook” public relations offensive to attract younger voters, especially blacks and Hispanics, by applying the party’s principles to “urban-suburban hip-hop settings.”

FIZZIXED, DAMMIT

 
 

I still don’t get why this is such a big deal.

It’s a fucking CARTOON, people!

 
 

I still don’t get why this is such a big deal.

In the 20th century, over three thousand people were killed in racially-motivated violence, more than half of the number of Americans killed by political violence. (That’s more than 9/11.)

And during Hurricane Katrina, the single most significant outbreak of violence took place as Ninth Ward residents were evacuated to high ground in Algiers Point, whose residents not only set up stockades in evident anticipation of some manner of invasion but threatened black locals and repeatedly shot non-locals for little to no reason. No police investigation took place, and the people responsible have been described as boasting of it, including one Chicagoan who thrilled at the idea of ‘earning’ his Southernness through lynching.

I understand in some circles worrying about black people being killed is irresponsibly radical, but this shit isn’t just history and it isn’t just abstract.

 
 

Sorry, a little under 3000 people. Still many more than 9/11.

 
 

So the NY Post has kind of apologized and how would you expect Malkin to react to that move?

Going ape over the New York Post

Al Sharpton and his race racketeers went ape over New York Post staffer Sean Delonas’s anti-stimulus editorial cartoon involving that famous crazed chimp. They picketed the News Corp. building, organized boycotts, targeted advertisers, floated a challenge to Rupert Murdoch’s FCC license — and now the New York Post has apologized.

Oops. Can I say “went ape” anymore? How about “going bananas?” Shall I refrain from asking the race demagogues to quit “monkeying around?” Do I erase “It’s a jungle out there” and “It’s a zoo” from my lexicon? How about “beastly?”

Holy shit.

Too many in the MSM continue to treat Sharpton as an entertaining clown, instead of the rabid hound he has always been. (”Hound.” Is that acceptable?)

Funny that, nobody would know who Al Sharpton is in the first place if it weren’t for the NY Post.

This is the moral of the story: Submission to racial intimidation yields only more racial intimidation. You don’t get the monkey off your back by feeding it.

Yeah, I said “get the monkey off your back.”

Sue me.

The comments are usually at least as bad as what Malkin posts but this time they’re struggling a little bit to keep up because she bogarted all the best slurs that don’t start with the letter n. Ok, she did leave “calling a spade a spade” out there and surprisingly it took nearly an hour for someone to claim it.

 
 

What’s always gotten me is that they vacillate so fucking much. They can’t just come out and say something inhuman to people who have never done anything to them; they then have to not just titter like a gaggle of schoolboys learning their first swear, but shout in loud, preemptive defense about how they were really talking about plucking, huh-huh-huh.

It’s like all the fucking racist memes during the big dicklicking Palinathon last year. I mean, Jesus, if you’re going to be as crass as to borrow lame jokes from interbellum racists, you might as well just fucking own up to it instead of playing coy. And by God, if you’re going to play coy, don’t get all fucking excited about how bad-ass you are! Jesus!

 
 

The fact is, liberal bias in the media is keeping you from seeing reality. Bernard Goldberg’s new book about you liberals drooling over Obsama nails you punks dead to rights, and exposes you as the MSM bias machine. We need conservative values, like the ones we have Here in the Heartland, reflected in the media or we will boycott.

For some reason, this makes me laugh hysterically every time I read it.

Go right ahead, Gary, if it makes you feel better to do so. But I don’t think you’ll be missed. The so-called “heartland” is mostly empty space. As is, what a coinkydink, conservatism itself.

 
 

the US came close to using German as a second language officially early on

Um, are you talking about this?

 
 

The Heartland is Alaska but not Hawaii; Utah but not Colorado; Arizona, but not New Mexico; Idaho, but not Nevada; Iowa but neither Dakota; South Carolina but not North; real Nebraska but not real Pennsylvania; West Virginia but not real Virginia; Indiana for a century but not last year; Macedonia but not Bulgaria; Joe the Plumber but not Joe Six-Pack; Colin Powell but not Joe Lieberman; the Marines but not the Army; Alberta but not America.

You know, chances are pretty good that 2010 is going to leave the Republicans weeping constantly. Their entire mythology is built around the Heartland loving them unconditionally, but the single defining characteristic of non-urban America is a relentless contempt for losers. And guess what they are these days?

 
 

JP: Impression was that the main problem was people misinterpreting it to be a vote for an official language rather than a secondary printing language. Color me corrected that the single-vote defeat was for tabling.

 
 

There was Cowboy Neil at the wheel of the bus to never-never land.

 
 

Oops. Can I say “went ape” anymore?

She’ll have to spit out the ping-pong balls first.

 
 

Hey, Autistic!

You really do have your pseudofacts and rebuttals and wrong-headed opinions on this topic so very well-rehearsed and basically at your fingertips, one might conclude you have an emotional commitment to this particular aspect of society.

As if it, you know, was the single most important thing in your life. Like it was an irrational obsession along the lines of Rainman’s obsession with baseball statistics.

One wonders why, if someone is not an uberracist, why one would be so well-versed in this particular topic when it’s relevance to society at large is so meaningless…

Perhaps you were gang-raped by some scary black men? Is that it? Enquiring minds want to know!

 
 

Perhaps you were gang-raped by some scary black men?

Or profoundly disappointed that he hasn’t been?

 
 

She’ll have to spit out the ping-pong balls first

Hands down the freshest joke of the Cambrian era.

 
 

what an entertaining and educational thread this has been!

thanks, folks!

 
 

1) shows whites are over 37 times more likely to be murdered or raped by a black person than vice versa

2) Because you sure are scared enough for one!

 
 

Now, your turn…

 
 

Yeah Gil, calling black people ‘apes’ is so cutting edge, I should show her more respect.

 
 

Please point to a statement of fact that I made that you consider to be incorrect.

Oh, gee, I dunno…

Here is how it will go down next week. First, the results from Virginia and North Carolina will come in, and they’ll be declared for McCain. You’ll be disappointed, but “no big deal, change can’t come overnight” will be your comment. Florida will go red, and a little nervousness will creep in. The usual suspects will fall into the usual categories. As the night drags on, Ohio, Colorado, and (much to your horror) Pennsylvania will be too close to call.

My advice at this point to you will be to go to bed. You will wake up to a McCain presidency and the Great Liberal Freakout will be on.

Bookmark this, liberals, as this is exactly how it is going to go down. You will be wonder how the hell I was able to call this.

 
 

DN,

I believe the term is BURRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRN!.

At least, that’s what I hear the kids say these days…

 
 

Yeah Gil, calling black people ‘apes’ is so cutting edge, I should show her more respect

Hey, don’t make it sound like I was being high-minded. I was calling you lazy, not offensive.

 
 

Here is how it will go down next week. First, the results from Virginia and North Carolina will come in, and they’ll be declared for McCain. You’ll be disappointed, but “no big deal, change can’t come overnight” will be your comment. Florida will go red, and a little nervousness will creep in. The usual suspects will fall into the usual categories. As the night drags on, Ohio, Colorado, and (much to your horror) Pennsylvania will be too close to call.

My advice at this point to you will be to go to bed. You will wake up to a McCain presidency and the Great Liberal Freakout will be on.

Bookmark this, liberals, as this is exactly how it is going to go down. You will be wonder how the hell I was able to call this.

 
 

Do you really think the FBI is in a conspiracy to make you look bad on Sadly,No! That they are making up their statistics just to show how blind you are to black racism?

Post the study, flyboy. I will bet it shows nothing even close to how you are characterizing it.

 
 

By the way, Autistic, I know the study you are referring to, and boy, are you going to eat crow in a big way when I get through with you. I just want to make sure you are clear in how you are going to hang yourself…

 
 

So it is racist to point out racist black people?

Nope.

But it is racist to fixate on it the way you have, pal.

 
 

Here is how it will go down next week. First, the results from Virginia and North Carolina will come in, and they’ll be declared for McCain. You’ll be disappointed, but “no big deal, change can’t come overnight” will be your comment. Florida will go red, and a little nervousness will creep in. The usual suspects will fall into the usual categories. As the night drags on, Ohio, Colorado, and (much to your horror) Pennsylvania will be too close to call.

My advice at this point to you will be to go to bed. You will wake up to a McCain presidency and the Great Liberal Freakout will be on.

Bookmark this, liberals, as this is exactly how it is going to go down. You will be wonder how the hell I was able to call this.

 
 

an early thread win for FlipYrWhig if it hasnt been announced:

RePublic Enemy: “It Takes a Nation of Millions to Hold Us Aloft” b/w “Fight the Powerless”

is teh lulz
…and oh yeah a FYWP just in case you dont like my html

 
 

See, it’s nice and all to be convinced that you’re mired in the middle of a racial holy war, but that doesn’t make trying to force a neighbor out of his home or shooting a series of men in the back because they’re holding beat-up hats and sneakers self-defense.

And a racist mob stringing blacks and Jews from trees at a minor affront – that is what ‘lynching’ fucking means, you fucking man-child – is obviously no more noteworthy than obviously pecuniary crimes committed by poor blacks and whites alike.

“Man bites dog”, right, because blacks just spend all day butchering any white who enters a fucking courthouse. Yeah, I’m sure that’s what comes to mind outta the Silent Majority.

 
 

an early thread win for FlipYrWhig

Yeah, that one jumped out at me too, and I daresay it deserves to be highlighted on the blog proper. Bonus points for using the name of a rap band that once threatened to assassinate McCain (great song, poor tribute to MLK).

First single: “911 is an Empty Slogan, an All-Purpose Excuse, and a Sick Fetish.”

 
 

I think it is a compelling story of people defending themselves during a complete break down of law and order. Let me guess, you think Bernie Goetz should have let himself get mugged and beaten, right? Goetz did absolutely the right thing and so did the people who decided not to let themselves be assaulted and robbed in Algiers Point, LA.

Again, there was no evident risk of being assaulted or robbed. It wasn’t self-defense but murder; the closest any of them even came to being remotely lawful was someone being shot for coming out of a convenience store.

The militia dipshits in Algiers Point didn’t just shoot people for no evident reason; they actively attempted to use a natural disaster to ethnically cleanse their neighborhood.

And calling it ‘self-defense’ is a disservice to the predominantly white neighborhoods that didn’t decide to try and respond to refugees with murder. There were people who tried to take advantage of the situation – looters, profiteers, and the operatives from the Republican Party down who thought, as you do, of the black population of New Orleans as subhuman. But by and large people pulled together.

I mean, sure, you could argue that Bernie Goetz getting mugged justified a few hyped-up bigots shooting anyone with the wrong color of skin and leaving them to die in the middle of a fucking hurricane, but that’s your problem, not ours.

 
 

Bernie Goetz opened fire in a narrow, enclosed subway car full of innocent bystanders.

Inexcusable and unforgivable on those grounds alone.

 
 

Aww, Troofus, why won’t you respond to me?

Here is how it will go down next week. First, the results from Virginia and North Carolina will come in, and they’ll be declared for McCain. You’ll be disappointed, but “no big deal, change can’t come overnight” will be your comment. Florida will go red, and a little nervousness will creep in. The usual suspects will fall into the usual categories. As the night drags on, Ohio, Colorado, and (much to your horror) Pennsylvania will be too close to call.

My advice at this point to you will be to go to bed. You will wake up to a McCain presidency and the Great Liberal Freakout will be on.

Bookmark this, liberals, as this is exactly how it is going to go down. You will be wonder how the hell I was able to call this.

Sack up, pussy!

 
 

Heeeere Truthy Truthy Truthy…..

 
 

Still waiting, Truthy.

 
 

I can sit here all day, Troofus.

 
 

Bawk bawk bawk BAWK….

 
 

Bawk bawk baGAWK

 
 

Poor, poor Twoofy.

 
 

I know you can read this, chickenshit.

 
 

We don’t exist!

 
 

Oh well. Troofus has been banned.

If you ever come back to read this, clown: Fuck you.

 
 

wiedziona ?akomstwem rzuci?a si? na ?up 1.bizness.
keed.pl i za nie przygl?da?a. Post?kuj?c
przysiad?, ustawi? troskliwie przyn?t?. Pocz?? czo?ga? si?
z powrotem, rozwijaj?c wewn?trz sob? d?ugotrwa?y s.

 
 

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