Rats. I want to vote for homosexuals too! But I live in Brooklyn, and we probably won’t have homosexuals in our BP election (not *out* homosexuals, anyway, and they’re the funnest kind). We will probably be forced to choose between Mart Markowitz (who is amusing, if straight) and a cabbage or something.

Wait! I can WRITE IN a homosexual! I choose Tennessee Williams.

Hurray for Brian Ellner! No pun intended, but I love that he just comes right out and says, “Here I am, I’m not taking any crap from the likes of George Bush, and by the way, here’s my equally handsome, cleancut, and appealing Gay Male Homosexual Man-Partner.” Yay!

What will those poor, parochial Manhattenites say when confronted by the insidious scandal of… gay hugging?!? The horror, the horror.

I don’t want to panic anyone but that homosexual was running for some sort of office.