Nathan Tabor Delivers a Masterpiece
Though Nathan Tabor is often overshadowed by wingnuttier Renew America writers like Kaye Grogan and Carey Roberts, he’s written an absolute masterpiece today called “Believe it or not: abortion causes illegal immigration.” Let’s dig in:
Believe it or not: abortion causes illegal immigration
Nathan Tabor
August 24, 2005Today, I’m going to tell you a tale that could have come straight out of the annals of Ripley’s “Believe It or Not.”
Not very many people have made the connection, but I believe that Legal Abortion in America is at least partially to blame for the human flood of Illegal Immigration streaming daily across our borders.
Y’know, there’s a good reason nobody’s made that connection before. Indeed, it’s the same reason that the Brookings Institution rejected my groundbreaking study on how the late-’90s East Asian financial crisis was sparked when Thailand decided to peg their currency to the domestic price of Meow Mix (I called it “The Cat in the Baht, or: ‘I Want Chicken, I Want Liver, Thailand’s Banks are in the Shitter.'”). In other words, no one has thought of it before because it’s really, really stupid.
Some will immediately dismiss this suggested linkage as being too far-fetched and preposterous…
Guilty as charged!
…but before rejecting the idea, let’s take a look at some interesting numbers.
Sure thing, Nate, I need a good laugh.
In 1973, the year that the notorious Roe v Wade decision became the law of the land, American women legally murdered 615,831 innocent unborn children. The grisly toll rose year by year, until by 1982 the number of annual abortions had doubled, reaching almost 1,304,000. Of course, these are the documented deaths, they fail to include the additional thousands of babies murdered outside the medical realm.
According to statistics from the Centers for Disease Control, the first eleven years of legal abortions in America killed about 11.9 million babies (from 1973 to 1983). If those aborted children had lived and grown to adulthood, their median age today would be 30.5 years old.
Of course, this directly relates to that famous counterculture slogan, “Don’t trust an aborted womb baby over 30.”
Now, the number of estimated illegal immigrants in the U.S.A. ranges from 10.3 million to 15 million; so add these two numbers together and divide by two, and you get about 12.5 million as a pretty close guesstimate of how many illegal workers, mostly Mexican, are now in America.
I’m glad that Nathan’s using such exacting statistical methods as “the guesstimate,” because otherwise we might not take his analysis very seriously.
Is this mere coincidence, or is there some direct correlation between those two numbers, 11.9 million and 12.5 million? I think it is both.
Nate. Seriously. Nate. Let’s talk.
I assume by “direct correlation” you mean there’s a causal relationship between the number of aborted babies and the number of illegal immigrants (I feel safe in this assumption since the title of your article is “Abortion Causes Illegal Immigration”). If there is a causal relationship, it isn’t coincidental. If it’s coincidental, then there isn’t a causal relationship. You can’t have it both ways.
Now maybe it’s not fair to expect very much from a Pat Robertson School of Government alum, but come on. This is not difficult stuff.
Without question, at least part of the reason why we have illegal immigrants crossing our borders in droves is because there is a need for more cheap laborers in the fields and factories of America. It is a simple economic proposition: increased demand creates its own supply.
Well, there’s also a large supply of immigrants who work in America so they can send dollars home to their families. Five bucks (or less) an hour might not be much here in the States, but in Mexico and other countries with weaker currencies, it’s worth quite a bit. Not that we should care, since the only thing immigrants are good for is picking lawns and mowing apples, but I thought I’d at least throw it out there.
In fact, these same feminist-inspired demographic trends have resulted in 34 million women joining the workforce between 1970 and 2000, during a time when American birth rates dropped from 18.4 to 13.9 per thousand.
I… uh… hold on. How did we get from talking about abortion to migrant labor to feminism within the span of three sentences? Shouldn’t you complete one thought before transitioning into a completely different thought? Seriously, I almost expect the next sentence to read, “This problem has further been exploited by the homosexual agenda, as the late ’90s saw an explosion of interior decorators who hired illegal Mexican lesbian abortionists as housekeepers.”
The new addition of these women to the workforce has helped to mask the growing demand for labor during a time of explosive economic expansion, “from 5.03 trillion in 1970 to 11.75 trillion in 2004 as measured in 2005 dollars,” as WorldNetDaily columnist Vox Day brilliantly pointed out in his August 15 column entitled “Girls just want to have fun.”
Yes, Vox brilliantly recited elementary economic statistics. That genius!
Day also warned that the American birth rate has fallen “by 25 percent to sub-replacement levels,” and this sterile trend threatens all of Western Civilization from North America to Europe. So maybe I’m not the only voice crying in the wilderness about the economic problems that legalized abortions have caused in our society.
In other words, we should encourage our women to stay home and pop out as many kids as they can. I hear that strategy has worked wonders for economic growth in countries like Nigeria, Uganda and Afghanistan!
True, the U.S. desperately needs welfare reform. There are far too many idle Americans who could do at least some of the menial, hard and dirty jobs that now go to illegal immigrants by default. Certainly, we need to cultivate a better work ethic and an entrepreneurial spirit among our own people.
“Harrumph, harrumph! Egad, old bean, these filthy Mexicans are doing jobs that could easily done by crippled single moms! I say, those wenches laze around all day growing fat off child support without contributing one blasted thing to our society!”
As the years pass we will see if my hypothesis is correct. If I am wrong, then illegal immigration eventually will level off.
Well, no it won’t because illegal immigration has nothing to do with abortion.
Here’s a recent first that does not bode well for our future. Just last week, the white American population of the state of Texas was officially declared to be a minority. Unless we somehow manage to seal our borders, California and New Mexico may not be far behind.
And that’s the best reason of all to stop immigration: to keep white people in power.
Here are some more disturbing figures. Between 1983 and 1993, we aborted 13.5 million babies in the U.S. Their median age today would be 20.5. These are nonexistent, wasted human beings who would be either in college right now, or just graduating high school and starting a job and maybe a family of their own.
But if you’d read Ben Shapiro, you’d know that those 13.5 million people would have become worthless hornball degenerate college kids anyway, so it’s probably good that they got knocked off when they did.
Who will replace them? Most likely, 15 million more foreign-born Hispanics with a propensity for hard work and a burning desire to reclaim the American Southwest for Mexico.
Whoa. Did he just say that 15 million Mexican-born immigrants were conspiring to lead an insurrection that would force the Southwest to secede? Seriously, let’s read that again:
Who will replace them? Most likely, 15 million more foreign-born Hispanics with a propensity for hard work and a burning desire to reclaim the American Southwest for Mexico.
Yep, he really said it.
OK, let’s sum up what we’ve just read, just to give you a sense of the vast craziness at work here:
-Nathan starts off by telling us that abortion causes illegal immigration.
-He goes on to say that women entering the workforce has done irreparable harm to our economy.
-Next, he blames welfare moms for sitting on their asses while the Mexicans take their jobs (no, I can’t reconcile the difference between this point and the last point either).
-Finally, he tops it all off with a paranoid rant about a Mexican-led immigrant secession.
This is not your average garden variety wingnuttery. It’s as if Michelle Malkin, Kaye Grogan, Pastor Swank, Ben Shapiro and Alan Keyes stood around in a circle, joined hands, and combined all their powers to summon…
CAPTAIN WINGUT!!!
At any rate, it’s a very impressive achievement, Nathan. We’ll be watching more closely in the future.
Between 1983 and 1993, we aborted 13.5 million babies in the U.S.Whoa, hold up, there, Mr. Nathan Kill-the-Womb-Babies, what’s this “we” business? I don’t know what kind of people you’re hanging out with, but I didn’t abort ANY fetuses during that time! But if I had, I would have been pretty mad, because some illegal took my hypothetical baby’s nonunionized factory job! Or something.I’m not, y’know, pro-abortion per se, but is drawing a connection between the economic vacuum left by 13.5 million unborn humans and the crappy, exploitative jobs that were thereby left unfilled really the way Tabor wants to go with this?Brad, I love the Meow Mix jingle.
when Thailand decided to peg their currency to the domestic price of Meow Mix (I called it “The Cat in the Baht, or: ‘I Want Chicken, I Want Liver, Thailand’s Banks are in the Shitter.'”).
Ok, I just laughed my ass off for the first time in this incredibly long day. Thanks : )
Now that, ladies and gentlemen, is how you do wingnuttery. He deserves to be a Special Contestant on s.z.’s Wingnut Island contest, doncha think?
The meow mix song is brilliant.
Truly stupendous wingnuttery. It’s like the triple axel of winguttery.
Sorry, cute as Nathan is–and he’s very handsome in my book–there’s limits to to how much even I’ll debase myself for sex. Yikes.
Sorry, cute as Nathan is–and he’s very handsome in my book–there’s limits to to how much even I’ll debase myself for sex. Yikes.
‘Zat you, Jim? 😀
As the years pass we will see if my hypothesis is correct. If I am wrong, then illegal immigration eventually will level off.
Sadly, No! heh sorry, always wanted to do that…
Well, in this nutter’s world, most of the babies being aborted come from loose welfare mothers (read: black). So we’re being cheated from being able to exploit those cheap black workers and have to use brown ones instead. I don’t know why he’s so exercised about this.
That is one seriously deranged individual. If he keeps up that kind of talk, he’ll get his own AM radio show.
As a militant homosexual decorator, I object to the implication that I hire illegal Mexican lesbian housekeepers.
She was Costa Rican.
Nathan addresses the 1973-83 and 83-93 cohorts, but totally ignores the 1993-2003 group. He could have continued:
“Between 1993 and 2003, we aborted 12 million babies in the U.S. Their median age today, if they had survived, would be 10.5. Think about how these missing children have affected the birthday clown and magician segments of our economy, not to mention the boost they would have given to Chuck E. Cheese, Toys ‘R’ Us, and Lemony Snicket. The children of illegal Mexican immigrants have filled this gap to some extent, but at the cost of a browning of the playgrounds across our great, white land.”
“Between 1993 and 2003, we aborted 12 million babies in the U.S. Their median age today, if they had survived, would be 10.5. Think about how these missing children have affected the birthday clown and magician segments of our economy, not to mention the boost they would have given to Chuck E. Cheese, Toys ‘R’ Us, and Lemony Snicket. The children of illegal Mexican immigrants have filled this gap to some extent, but at the cost of a browning of the playgrounds across our great, white land.”
ROFL.
I concede that I might possibly find that funny once the medications kick in. Until then, Nathan:
Get some ovaries, stop being white, get a menial job, try to support your family on one Wal-Mart wage, get your ass back in the kitchen.
Then, we’ll talk about your stupid theories. But until then, you appear to have racked up a perfect record of talking total shit about a half-dozen subjects you clearly know less than dick about, and have even less right to weigh in on, so try not to embarrass yourself any more. Okay, pumpkin?
You write this as though you don’t think it actually happened. I thought everybody knew about that. Silly straight people.
It’s just beautiful the way it all fits together! Kind of like how everything starts to make sense once you realize that Elvis sitings are caused by alien abductors from the Bermuda triangle who use crop circles to bend spoons.
Nathan’s opinion is hereby requested on the topic of the correlation between legal abortion and a drop in juvenile/young adult crime 13-15 years later. The cohort of unwanted children of poverty seems to be smaller leading to a concommitant drop in the crimes most commonly associated with the socioeconomic group.
batshit
The article was silly. Abortion had been legalized in almost half the states, covering over have the population, at the time RvW was decided. Including, but not limited to NY and CA. In addition abortion was available for relatively wealthy women, in hospitals. It wasn’t called abortion, but that’s what it was. It was the poorer women who had to resort to “back-alley” abortions–if they could pay for them.
Nathan Tabor is a conservative political activist based in Kernersville, North Carolina, where he owns a successful small business and was recently a candidate for Congress. He has his Master’s Degree in Public Policy from the Robertson School of Government at Regent University.
Regent University? The standards at the Christian Maddrassas must really be slipping, if competence in basic comparative analysis is any indication. I mean something being both in a cause-effect relationship and coincidence?
Mullah Robertson must be made aware of this, at once.
I say beginner’s luck. He could just be a minor leaguer who happened to hit a homer at his first at bat. let’s see him sustain this level before we put him with the “great” “Kaye” “Grogan!”
A little comparison:
H.R. Storer, physician and leader of the antiabortion crusade of the 19th Century invoking a race suicide argument against abortion (From “Why Not? A Book for Every Woman 1866):
“This subject [abortion], at all times so important for the consideration of the people at large, is invested with unusual interest at a period like the present, when, at the close of a long and closely contested war, greater fields for human development and success are opened than ever before. All the fruitfulness of present generation, tasked to its utmost, can hardly fill the gaps in our population that have of late been made by disease and the sword, while the great territories of the far West, just opening to civilization, and the fertile savannas of the South, now disinthralled and first made habitable by freemen, offer homes for countless millions yet unborn. Shall they be filled by our own children or by those of aliens? This is a question that our own women must answer; upon their loins depends the future destiny of the nation.” (84-85)
Here is Tabor’s contemporary remix of the race suicide argument, from the last couple paras of his article:
“Here are some more disturbing figures. Between 1983 and 1993, we aborted 13.5 million babies in the U.S. Their median age today would be 20.5. These are nonexistent, wasted human beings who would be either in college right now, or just graduating high school and starting a job and maybe a family of their own.
Who will replace them? Most likely, 15 million more foreign-born Hispanics with a propensity for hard work and a burning desire to reclaim the American Southwest for Mexico.”
Ah, the imperialist ambitions of “wetbacks.”
“This subject [abortion], at all times so important for the consideration of the people at large, is invested with unusual interest at a period like the present, when, at the close of a long and closely contested war, greater fields for human development and success are opened than ever before.
This is why I hate 19th Century writing. It takes him 50 words to make a point he could have made in 15. God bless you, Ernest Hemingway.
“Here’s a recent first that does not bode well for our future. Just last week, the white American population of the state of Texas was officially declared to be a minority. Unless we somehow manage to seal our borders, California and New Mexico may not be far behind.”
Heh. Don’t you just love it when they don’t even try to hide their racism?
Brad,
Couldn’t agree more on 19th century prose. The saddest thing is, Mark Twain, a writer of wit and brevety at his best, thought “A Personal History of Joan of Arc”, a overwrought, overwritten example of 19th century sentiment and selfindulgence, would be the work he would like as his legacy.
Sheesh.
batshit
Y’know, if we just annexed Mexico (and maybe Haiti) then we could go on aborting all the womb-babies we want without having to ever worry about illegal immigration again.
Here’s a little hint as to the rigor with which Nathan researches his statistics.
Just last week, the white American population of the state of Texas was officially declared to be a minority. Unless we somehow manage to seal our borders, California and New Mexico may not be far behind.
Indeed, they are not far behind. Texas was the fourth state to enter majority-minority status. Hawaii, of course, has always been so. The second and third states to enter that category? Uh, California and New Mexico.
It’s too late, cracker! Lock up your sister!
Y’know, if we just annexed Mexico (and maybe Haiti) then we could go on aborting all the womb-babies we want without having to ever worry about illegal immigration again.
Dammit, Yosef, this proves why you’re the hottest young conservative writer on the Internets. We MUST get you a gig at The Rant.
There are far too many idle Americans who could do at least some of the menial, hard and dirty jobs that now go to illegal immigrants by default. Certainly, we need to cultivate a better work ethic and an entrepreneurial spirit among our own people.
You know, I just might consider someone who sits on his ass at a computer pecking out useless drivel about how lazy poor folks are with hardly any research other than cribbing from a Vox Day column to be an “idle American”, though I’d probably add “motherfucker” and “hypocrite”.
“…upon their loins depends the future destiny of the nation.”
I’m using that line at the bar tonight.
[Note: I wrote and tried to post this yesterday, but was thwarted by “technical difficulties.” (I smell censorship!) Anyway, I know batshit made a similar point in the interim, but it’s sitting on my clipboard, so you all get stuck with it.]
OK, the guy’s a major wingnut, no question. But his “hypothesis” is actually a twisted analogue to Steven Levitt’s non-wingnutty hyopthesis in Freakonomics that the legalization of abortion may be causally related to the drop in crime rates. I wonder what Nathan’s reaction to that would be — or does he really think that all those aborted fetuses would now be matriculating in the Ivy League and getting ready to be the next generation’s Best and Brightest (and whitest)?
I must remember not to read this blog when I’m in a public library. My snickering was heard by everyone.
Just last week, the white American population of the state of Texas was officially declared to be a minority.
And this is bad… why?
Just reading that paragraph alone makes me wonder if he has an article in the works about how people of different cultural backgrounds and skin colors marrying and having children with one another will somehow destroy America. If he hasn’t published one already, that is.
Yep, that thing about white people becoming–horrors!–THE MINORITY in Texas came straight out of the neo-nazi’s propaganda playbook. Who cares if whites are in the minority?
Brad R., you should try treading the whole book. Yucko. Still, it is nice to know that the same paranoid racism motivates some antiabortionists today. A little something you can depend on.
Treading instead of reading? A rather appropriate typo.
Goddammit, I hate Potsie
My father works in the Border Patrol (you know, the redneck version of the law enforcement). He’s been spouting this off for years “The Mexicans are trying to undertake us since they can’t overtake us! They don’t have any loyalty to the US! They simply steal welfare cheques!”
So, this isn’t the only one.
Let me see if I got this. Every time an abortion is performed, a Mexican risks his life to get to America.
After there are enough of them, they make Texas rejoin Mexico? They risk their fucking lives just to get back where they started? Huh?
Maybe I can get my wife to debate Nathan, as she also has a Master of Public Policy from a North Carolina university. In her case, however, it’s Duke, that great bastion of leftist thought. She also learned hardcore Marxism at Duke’s b-school, where she picked up an MBA when she wasn’t learning anti-US insurgency.
‘Tis a sad state of affairs indeed when Marie Jon’ looks logical by comparison, though Nathan’s spelling & grammar is better.
“Is this mere coincidence, or is there some direct correlation between those two numbers?”
That’s right, every aborted baby SHOULD have been born to be harvesting lettuce in the Imperial Valley.
“These are nonexistent, wasted human beings who would be either in college right now, or just graduating high school and starting a job and maybe a family of their own.”
Uh….either in college, or picking strawberries in Oxnard?
“The new addition of these women to the workforce has helped to mask the growing demand for labor” …….by filling it.
But his “hypothesis” is actually a twisted analogue to Steven Levitt’s non-wingnutty hyopthesis in Freakonomics that the legalization of abortion may be causally related to the drop in crime rates.
Except Levitt did, you know, research and stuff.
I just sent an e-mail to the esteemed Mr. Tabor that read:
Regarding your column “Believe it or not: abortion causes illegal
immigration” I have a suggestion. Grab a dictionary and look these
words up:
Causation
Correlation
Coincidence
You see Nathan, even though they all begin with the letter “C” and
have several syllables, they are not the same. In fact you’ll be
amazed at what they really mean and how they apply to your “theory”.
And then, for god’s sake take an entry level college logic course.
He replied thusly:
Thanks! Please add http://www.theconservativevoice.com to your favorites
and pass it along to your family and friends.
Conservatively yours,
Nathan Tabor
So yes, I expect more output of Swankian proportions from Nathan.
Forgot my name on the last post. The fact that Nathan replied to my e-mail made me a little
faklempt
What? He didn’t offer to pray for you?
F*cking heretic.
I’m a Texas native (and resident) and let me tell you that all of us white folk down here feel so threatened by those damn mexkins that we’d… uh, we’d… wait, what was my point again? Oh well, couldn’t have been that important. On with the show!
‘Zat you, Jim? 😀
D’oh! Forgot to add my name to that. Yep, that was me, of course. I was following links yesterday and I came upon a picture of Dan Bartlett, Shrub’s advisor. He is *gorgeous*, just sexy as all hell. And like straight women who lament that “all the best men are gay?”, I lament “Why are some of the hottest men such total douches as people?”. One for the philosophy majors, I suppose.
Has Nathan Tabor heard of the theory that the legalization of abortion led to today’s decreased crime rate?
And which low-paying, menial job is Mr. Tabor willing to take back from an illegal immigrant?
Jim, that’s only true if you have low standards. When a hot guy turns out to be an asshole, he ceases to be hot. (And Nate isn’t “all that” to begin with.)
Oh no! White people not in the majority! Why, one of them filthy coloreds could start making white people wages if we’re not careful!
Sorry, I haven’t slept at night for three days.
Hey Yosef… Are You Ready for Senator Nathan Tabor???
Nathan Tabor is one of my all-time favorite wingnuts. In the past, he has advocated for outlawing divorce; he has blamed abortion for illegal immigration; he has attacked Abe Lincoln and Lyndon Johnson while standing up for segregation; and he…
NATHAN IS A NERD
Tell that homophobe to bend over and crack a smile…….
We have an illegal immigration problem due to a labor shortage in this country. Why do we have a labor shortage? Because the spoiled baby boom generation destroyed 1/3 of their children in abortion clinics. I challenge anyone to prove me wrong. So simple, yet true. You can’t destroy millions of citizens and suffer no ill effects. The same thing is happening in Europe with massive immigration from third world countries. We have become victims of our own success. Life is so easy and enjoyable here that we have became too selfish to create life.Convenience abortion will one day be looked upon as western civilization’s greatest mistake.
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