Shorter Michael Ledeen
Posted on January 6th, 2009 by HTML Mencken
Above: “[O]ne of our foremost observers of Iran” – J. Buttmissile, Esq. Right.
- Never mind that for years I’ve asserted that Iran is a greater menace than Nazi Germany, the Soviet Union, and the legions of Mordor combined; now I’m telling you that it’s a paper tiger! What better time, then, to launch an invasion of Syria and Persia than right now?
‘Shorter’ concept created by Daniel Davies and perfected by Elton Beard. We are aware of all Internet traditions.™
Aw-reet!! Production has returned!!
And the workers control it! Oh, socialist paradise.
Paragraph 2 is somewhat mind-blowing: Iran as a big player in Al Qaeda.
Mobilize The Red State Stoke Farce!
Where’s the Internet traditional link to “foremost observer” Ledeen’s “Wooo!! The Ayatollah’s Dead!!” post?
No doubt…
…they must be convinced…
This belief was no doubt…
Even shorter Ledeen: lacking any direct knowledge, I will just invent a bunch of shit.
The voices in my head have a message for you guys.
You are all just a bunch of ZIONISTS!
ZIONISTS! ZIONISTS! ZIONISTS! ZIONISTS! ZIONISTS! ZIONISTS!
Ahhh… that’s better.
Is Ledeen the fuckwit who said we should, every now and then, pick up some “crappy little country” and throw it against the wall, just to show people that we’re the sort of people who would kill people for no reason other than to show people that we’re the sort of people who would kill people for no reason…?
Though IIRC the shorthand was to show that “we mean business”.
I really want to understand the way the warmongers move backwards and forwards between “EXISTENTIAL THREAT TO THE WORLD” to “nobody fucking country we can smash in a cakewalk” in a split-second.
It’s like we’ve been in the grips of borderline defective personalities since the end of the Cold War. Either something is the darkest evil imaginable, or nothing.
X. G.: Yes!
XGilchrist@8; I think that was little Tommy Friedman
It’s the darkest evil imaginable, but God & the Military-Industrial Complex make AmeriKKKa able to defeat even our weakling existential menaces.
Shorter shorter Ledeen: “Hey, if telling you Iran was a great threat didn’t get you to attack them, what if I told you they were no threat at all? Would that w
Okay, apparently the intertrons didn’t like the word “work”. Again:
***
Shorter shorter Ledeen: “Hey, if telling you Iran was a great threat didn’t get you to attack them, what if I told you they were no threat at all? Would that work for ya? Wouldja attack then? No? Then what?”
X. G.: Yes!
Thanks – but ugh, Ledeen interpreted by the Pantload. It would have to be a wretched idea with those two cheering for it.
Ledeen:
Not for them no doubt indeedy…
and
And it is central to my point that they have survived this long.
“Supportive actions”? Here they are:
Oh, that’ll deliver some fucking message to the Iranian people. I bet they’ll “get it,” too. (What were the un-“attractive parlays?”)
Here Ledeen attempts to appear human-like, at least to those in the Rabid Weasel echo chamber.
I’m convinced. He’s humanoid.
We should attack Iran now, when their military strength is weakened by their faltering economy!
…What?
Leeden will be getting his Strokefaster badge in the mail soon, no doubt. This a last throw of the dice, IMO, he knows that he only has 14 days left of the Most Munificent Preznit There’s Ever Been so he has to get those Halliburton shares up while he can.
Ah yes, Michael Ledeen, my favorite antisemitic Semite. Fucking rightard, neocon racist asshat who has been wrong about everything he ever wrote.
Fucking rightard, neocon racist asshat who has been wrong about everything he ever wrote.
DrDick, please get to the point. I find your longwindedness annoying.
Shorter Ledeen: Iran is powerful and dangerous so we must destroy it but since Iran is weak and hollow it will be easy.
“No doubt, the Iranians believe the fall in oil prices is the result of satanic will, rather than the shock to demand produced by the runup to $140/barrel. Not for them the subtleties of the free market;”
He gets to make-shit up that’s both patently transparent AND de-humanizes those he wises to commit genocide upon. Does it get any better for wingnuts?
That earlier Ledeen post was a classic. Ledeen reprises the Sportspalast speech. We must be willing to make sacrifices in our war against an unreasoning enemy! Total War!
Mencken, have you been slamming Red Bulls all day? You’re on fire, man.
Fuck, is anyone watching Colbert? Heee…
Didn’t Ledeen also claim for some time that Ayatollah Khamenei was dead? Or did I imagine that?Seriously, I think Ledeen is a “foremost Iran expert” in the same way Roger Cohen is a “Cuba expert” after spending a couple weeks there…
Jennifer said,
January 6, 2009 at 6:47
Mencken, have you been slamming Red Bulls all day? You’re on fire, man.
Which is a good thing.
If/was HTM to be growing weeds (*coff*) then he would have more time for S,N!
The corn and soybeans and such as are far too time consuming, and less rewarding.
Ledeen & the “dead” ayatollah. (From two yrs. ago today.)
The original “bad intel” item may have disappeared from PJM.
Another good’n from PJM:
The Shame of the Village Voice: Somebody Bring Back Henftoff![sic]
Just for the (Headline, best kind!) typo. Article, meh.
As proof of his commitment to the struggle against Iranian cultural domination, “one of our foremost observers of Iran” refuses to learn Farsi.
If you learn Farsi, the terrorists have won.
Shorter Ledeen: teh Orcs only have Nerf clubs & spears! KILL KILL KILL!
Yeah, why only be at war against two countries at once when you can go for the Trifecta? After all, America isn’t technically bankrupt YET – because it’s just not blowing shit up sincerely enough!
PROTIP: if someone claims to be an “expert” on something while advocating bombing the fuck out of it, it is likely they aren’t really much of an expert at it.
Bonus points for not knowing the local lingo (an obvious prerequisite for foreign studies, even at the undergrad level) – I guess he doesn’t want too many relevant facts clouding his judgement when he pulls stupid ideas out of his ass.
If you learn Farsi, the terrorists have won
Love the recent explosion of HTMLage, BTW.
Shortest Ms. Ledeen: BLOOD! MUST HAVE BLOOD!
Oh no, he’s been saying it’s a paper tiger too. I remember reading that shit in NR back in like ’95 or something. Also it’s Nazi Germany except worse and more scary threatening. Oh yeah, and on the brink of collapse. But really dangerous!
Note: U.S. pundits did the same thing about the Soviets for decades, too, just usually not including the “attack” option due to all the nukes — i.e., the Soviet menace threatens to crush us, yet the imminent collapse of the Soviet Union represents an even greater menace. And on and on.
Oh no, he’s been saying it’s a paper tiger too. I remember reading that shit in NR back in like ‘95 or something. Also it’s Nazi Germany except worse and more scary threatening. Oh yeah, and on the brink of collapse. But really dangerous!
And it’s attacking us! ATTACKING us! Constantly! I know it doesn’t look like it, but it is! So bombing the shit out of them is obviously an honorable act of self-defense!
PROTIP: if someone claims to be an “expert” on something while advocating bombing the fuck out of it, it is likely they aren’t really much of an expert at it.
Thanks for telling everyone that, now I’ll NEVER get my landscaping business off the ground. So to speak.
Even Shorter, All-Purpose Michael Ledeen:
Sure, it loses some detail, but it’s a pretty accurate summary of everything Ledeen writes.
.
You Zionist BASTARDS!
I HATE YOU ALL!
It’s hard to keep up with all the reasons Ledeen gives for invading Iran, since he’s just keeps flinging shit hoping something will work – and generally lies when questioned on past statements.
Off topic but I have been watching a documentary from the BBC called The Power of Nightmares that I recommend looking for.
It discusses the rise of neocons and the parallels with the muslim extremist movement. It also features alot of neocons bloviating (thanks Attaturk).
And thank you Netflix for having it available.
Also available via bittorrent:
The Power Of Nightmares
.