Just asking

So there are these ads up at Kos’s and a bunch of other places for the American Volleyball…um, “Party,” the beach volleyball association. (It might say somewhere on the AVP’s website what ‘AVP’ stands for, but I couldn’t find it amidst all the faux-accidental action shots of people’s butts.)

Now first of all, I’m aware that beach volleyball is an Olympic sport and so forth. But its success would seem to have less to do, ultimately, with the sandy playing surface that differentiates it from ordinary volleyball, than with the fact that the players are all bouncing around with barely any clothes on. Let’s just be grown-ups about that.

And mind you, if I had anything against nudity, I wouldn’t be sitting here naked except for a cowboy hat. It’s hot out, and I like cowboy hats.

But honestly, what in Sam Hill is up with this text?

wacholder.jpg
I’m Rachel Wacholder
I will Lay Out
For Every Last Ball

[Update: Partner-swapping? ]

 

Comments: 30

 
 
 

I saw those, too. I’m not sure what to make of it either, so I’m going to have to examine it more thoroughly.

 
 

You know what the most disgusting thing about those ads is? Well if you follow the link and click on the Photo Gallery tab what do you see? Guys without their shirts on. What’s up with that?

 
 

I think that “AVP” stands for “American Volleyball Politically.”

 
 

Totally. Now biathalon — that’s a sport. You ski around and shoot things with a rifle. You don’t see those guys prancing like nimrods in their underwear.

 
 

I’m not sure what’s up with the text. The caption for my picture reads “My ass is hungry for Comfort Zone bikini bottoms and sand. Pee on me.” See if you can spot me!

 
 

teh l4m3, are you sure that you didn’t wander on to the Rant site by mistake?

 
 

That’s funny — mine says, “Ms. Wacholder is a serious athlete, so definitely don’t be looking for camel-toe and ‘wardrobe malfunctions’ in THIS broadcast showdown.”

 
 

Strange, mine says “An old proverb says, “You are not what you think you are, but you are what you think.”

 
 

Now mine says, “Hi, I’m Wilson. Perhaps you’ve played with my balls.”

 
 

Oh, dear-first, complaints about photo galleries that have some male toplessness, and then this:
You ski around and shoot things with a rifle. You don’t see those guys prancing like nimrods in their underwear.
Where is Jim, when you need someone to say, “I’d watch biathalon if it featured Ben Shapiro skiing around in his skivvies!”?
*sigh*
Well, I guess I’ll just have to fill in.
I’d watch either of those sports if they were sponsored by 2 (x) ist.

 
 

We kid …We kid…

 
 

Marq, it’s YOUR job to leer at male toplessness. Division of labor, yo.

 
 

From each according to his abilities, to each according to his needs.

 
 

Also, I looked around for some really lurid male shots just now, to add or switch a link, and apparently they don’t select for them the way they do for the female-butt shots.

If you can find a good one, lemme know.

 
 

Association of Volleyball Professionals. You make the classic blunder of assuming an “A” in any acronym stands for “American”.

 
 

Like the Triple-A — The American Americans of America. No really, where’d you find the info on the site? I looked until I zoned.

 
 

Consider the manly sport of sumo. Butt cheeks. The only sport where the referees are armed with deadly weapons. Grand Champions assume semi living-god status. Good web presence including live streaming matches. Online rotisserie-type games. Fanatics around the world.

 
 

Beach Volleyball

now THAT’s what I’m talkin’ ’bout.

 
 

I’m perfectly willing to leer at most any semi-naked photos, but, damn, sand chafes. You can keep the beach volleyballers.
You’d think they’d make a bigger deal out of their title, actually. “Hey! We’re professionals! Keep your smart ass remarks to yourself!”

 
 

“Laying out” is when a player makes a full dive, such that their body is parallel to the sand, to save a ball from hitting the sand. That it has a sexual connotation is, I’m sure, a happy coincidence to the advertisers.

 
 

call me a ball then… I’ve watched volleyball a couple times on ABC or whoever airs them and they are pretty athletic but it’s all about sex. Things usually are, which is one reason why conservatives are so uptight and bad in bed (generally speaking).

 
 

The real caption of “How am I different from Anna Kournikova and Danica Patrick?- I win” that one’s great because what it really is saying is “but I’m still like totally hot.” I wish Lindsay Davenport and maybe Svetlana Kuznetsova played volleyball and won all their matches so the f***ers at AVP would have to be like, “oh, watch our sport for the hell of it”. Maybe it would be awesome if Kos could say something stupid about this ad and the shit could hit the fan again. Wah wah.

 
 

Guys without their shirts on. What’s up with that?

I can think of one thing…heh heh, heh heh…

Oh, gosh. Back to biblical worldview discussion for me.

 
 

Please Mr Sadly, just say NO.

 
 

a.m., could you please stop sleeping with conservatives?

 
The Dark Avenger
 

The only sport where the referees are armed with deadly weapons

Have you forgotten the Vulcan ritual of kunta kalifee?

I guess technically it’s combat, and not sport, but the referees are armed.

 
 

Get lost, Rachel Wacholder

Is anyone else sick unto death of these ads? I’ve no problem with the whole flat abs/taut buns/grit in the swimsuit allure of the American Volleyball Professionals - heavens, no. But the ubiquitous and self-aggrandizing BlogAds for Rachel Wacholde…

 
 

I’m all over it. It’s biblical to desire the most attractive looking women.

 
 

I’ve managed to save up roughly $66218 in my bank account, but I’m not sure if I should buy a house or not. Do you think the market is stable or do you think that home prices will decrease by a lot?

 
 

Hm… have any of you actually ever watched the AVP( which stands for the Association of Volleyball Professionals)? If you have, you’d know that everything you’ve been saying is wrong. Rachel Wacholder as well as the other players on the tour are many times the athletes that any of you could ever be. To ‘Lay Out’ in beach volleyball means to make a dive for the volleyball, in which a player’s body is touching the ground or parallel to it. Anything else that you sick-minded people are thinking is just you, not Rachel or the AVP. Rachel Wacholder is a very nice person and if any of you actually MET her, you would know that she is not a person to sponsor an add of said nature. As for the issue of the clothing that the players wear, often it is over 100 degrees F out out on the sand, and they want to keep cool. Besides, the AVP management decides what uniforms players are to wear, not Rachel Wacholder or anyone else.

 
 

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