So much for that Eighth Commandment again.

mariejoncolor.jpg
“I think that the Democrats should reflect on what they themselves do that is corrupt and recognize that they are desperately trying to transfer their evil deeds to the Republican Party.”

From Marie Jon’s new column at PeoplePolitical.org

An old proverb says, “You are not what you think you are, but you are what you think.” The statement is not merely an ancient proverb, but it is also a Bible truth. The Bible states that as a man thinks in his heart, so is he (Proverbs 23:7).

[…]

Satan attacks all of us in many ways, but perhaps his most vigorous assault is brought to bear upon our thoughts. What we think eventually makes us what we are. Our thoughts often lead to actions — and so the battleground is within our thoughts. Each of us is responsible for what we welcome into our mind.

From ‘A Call to Thought Purity,’ by Harold S. Martin (1892-1961)

An older proverb says, “You are not what you think you are, but you are what you think.” The statement is not merely an ancient proverb, but it is also a Bible truth. The Bible states that as a man thinks in his heart, so is he (Proverbs 23:7).

Satan attacks all of us in many ways, but perhaps his most vigorous assault is brought to bear upon our thought lives. Satan knows that what we think, eventually makes us what we are. He knows that our thoughts often lead to actions — and so he works on our thought lives. Each of us is responsible for what he welcomes into his mind.

mariechurchsign.jpg

[See here and keep scrolling up the page for context and further details]

 

Comments: 1377

 
 
 

yeah, well, um, CLINTON, CLINTON, CLINTON!

 
 

damn, it dropped the (start marie) and the (stop marie tags.) sorry bout that.

 
 

Reminds me of another proverb, “A fool can use a proverb about as well as a crippled man can use his legs.”

 
 

Doesn’t the fact that MJ put another whole paragraph between those two exonerate her of whatever false charges you’re implying?

What do you think about most of the time? What puts a smile on your face?

Oh, you KNOW what puts a smile on my face, MJ. Don’t you? Don’t you, you little vixen?

… these good and lovely thoughts produce happy endorphins inside the brain …

I try to keep my endorphins happy, too. “C’mon, you crazy polypeptides, let’s us go out, get us some Ouzo, and find some neuroreceptors willing to bind!”

 
 

Wow, she can channel a dead moron.

maybe that’s here secret. Automatic writing.

It might explain the grammar and spelling (though not the ‘).

 
 

> Each of us is responsible for what we welcome into our mind.

Hence MJ”s obvious desire to play it safe by letting as little into her mind as possible.

 
 

I just like how MJ’ revised the final sentence to make it grammatically incorrect.

 
 

One’s own personal choice of language tells much about oneself.

Yes, yes it does, MJ. Recognition of this is the first step toward grammatical rehabilitation. Your honesty with yourself has earned the respect of everyone here. We want to help.

 
 

One can be stupid and one can be a theif, to be both is to invite disaster.

 
 

Marie Jon’:

Please dear, they won’t let up. Contact me at once and we can get together and gin up some writing of your own over a bottle of wine. If worse comes to worse you can copy your next column from the label.

All that I ask in return is a personal demonstration of the PeePo thong in action.

 
 

From MJ”s bio tag:
>>Marie Jon’ is the founder of PeoplePolitical.org Marie attends
>>nursing school in her state. […] Her writing style is down to earth.

“Down to earth” is apparently a highly-compressed euphemism for “her grammar, word choice and punctuation are downright hallucinatory, and she steals.”

 
 

Plagarized wingnuttery. Is there any crime more pathetic?

 
 

I can’t imagine why she’d do it AGAIN after getting busted for the last column.

It’s not hard to spot, either: You look at her stuff and get to a sentence that has measured cadences, and sure enough, it’s copied from somewhere.

I didn’t even check the rest of the column.

 
 

So Satan is the one responsible for those nasty feelings I let into my mind? As in, reading MJ columns makes me wanna smoke meth? I was going to blame Marie, but now that I know it’s Satan, I’ll never stop. Off to Freerepublic I go, tra la la.

 
 

Hey, if it’s good enough for Doris Kearns Goodwin, it’s good enough for Marie.

 
 

In regards to the faking scandal and wha?, our stance is not to discuss an ongoing investigation.

Marie, I’m glad to see you shaved your mustache.

 
 

Let’s try it, Saami poika.

MJ:
An old proverb says, “You are not what you think you are, but you are what you think.” The statement is not merely an ancient proverb, but it is also a Bible truth. The Bible states that as a man thinks in his heart, so is he (Proverbs 23:7).

Anabaptists.org
An older proverb says, “You are not what you think you are, but you are what you think.” The statement is not merely an ancient proverb, but it is also a Bible truth. The Bible states that as a man thinks in his heart, so is he (Proverbs 23:7).

That was the first sentence. That’s enough. Has she no shame? If I were caught plagiarizing, I’d hide myself away and not show my crimson face for a good long time. She blithely trips along, plagiarizing like she doesn’t know any better.

I think I’ve got it. That picture up there isn’t of Marie Jon’. Marie Jon’ is a young child pretending to be an adult. And she fooled you. HaHa.

 
 

She’s got sisu, eh?

 
 

Well, when we Finns think of sisu, it’s usually something worthwhile like kicking Russki butt. No, Marie Jon’ needs another stereotypical Finnish-ism to explain her columns. Not only does she have sisu, she’s pig drunk.

 
 

Well, my stock of appropriate Finnish expressions is mostly permutations of vittu — and in fact half the spoken language is probably just variations on vittu with other terms thrown in for variety…

Do you know how to inflect vittu in the case that means, ‘out of?’

 
 

Like, vittun is ‘into.’

 
 

I know one Finnish-ism is to dress up like a little girl when you try to go get sundries from someone so that they don’t realize that you’re a runaway little boy trying to take a slave up to the free states on a raft.

 
 

Not to mention those dudes in Split Enz.

 
 

I bear an uncanny resemblance to Neil Finn. It was to the point where the ladies would ask for my autograph. Of course this was back during the heady Crowded House era. And of course I never used my resemblance for evil only for good.

 
 

Any progress on the flashing Marie beacon?

 
 

Sorry, I can’t do the Finnish endings or verbs. This page might help: http://www.insultmonger.com/swearing/finnish.htm

 
 

I was thinking of something quite simple – a animated flashing spinning Virgen de Guadalupe that intones “Marie in da house” every time she enters the site.

 
 

Ah, but that would be copying — exactly how Marie keeps getting in trouble.

Let’s say paska vitulta. Apparently vittun drops a ‘t’ when going into the whatsitive case…

See, one of the greatest things is how these terms sound when you operatically blurt them out. PAHS-ka!

That’s cursin’, man.

 
 

Jumalauta, I’d hate to be born of Marie after what you said!

I also like this one: “?itisi nai poroja” which means your mother copulates with reindeer.
(http://www.insultmonger.com/swearing/finnish.htm)

 
 

I checked Marie’s IP address during the threats/lawyer thing, and she actually shares an IP and time stamp with two other people who stop by a lot (who live in the same area, apparently). So it’s not 100% certain that it’s her — more like 85%, depending on who else is around.

 
 

damn, straight cold busted in a blatant act of plagiarism.

apparently she stole from someone who thought we should set up “thought police”. hmmm… ms jon’ is starting to look less like a silly wingnut and like an actual neo-nazi…

 
 

I also like this one: “?itisi nai poroja” which means your mother copulates with reindeer.

Yeah, I was talking to Marq about that a couple days ago. He was like, “I don’t like when people use the word, ‘fag,'” and I was like, “Yeah, I have sort of a thing about rendeer-fucking jokes when directed personally.” And then I was thinking, “Well that’s silly; how often do reindeer-fucking jokes really come up, honestly?”

But see, there it is! It happened!

Not offended of course, but one might shoot back with suksi porovittun!

 
 

The Finnish is flying thick and heavy! That’s when you know the going’s getting rough and the tough are gettin’ goin’!

 
 

Comedic gold!

 
 

Thank goodness you don’t take it personally, because I’d be in big trouble if you did. According to this page:
http://www.orkneyjar.com/folklore/selkiefolk/origins/origin3.htm
“the Saami were regarded as great sorcerors with the power to control the weather, travel great distances in magical trances and shapeshift – usually into the form of a sea animal or bear.”

I don’t want to be on the wrong side of your Saami-Fu! 🙂

More seriously, I also have ancestors who were from the reindeer herding areas where the sun never sets in the summer. Let’s end on two things we can agree on. Porot ovat s?p?j?. Koti ei ole koti ilman saunaa.

And for Marie, I say this: S?isin mieluummin salmiakkia. Mit? hinta on y?lt??

 
 

About what you said: I’m afraid my skis are packed away for the summer, and besides, the reindeer don’t trust me anymore.

 
 

Come on People let?s get Political! The question on the table is who is hotter Kira or Absolutely Sweet Marie

We?re using PeoplePolitical?s latest poll as our proxy voting booth.

Remember a vote for Kira is a vote for Mom, apple pie, America, our troops, and a vote against racial profiling. A ?yes? vote is a vote for Marie, plagiarism and raciacl profiling.

The choice has never been clearer.

 
 

Stop fanning the flames of division, GregH. Don’t you know it makes us look weak, and gives the enemy aid-and-comfort.

In fact, I would go so far as to say that supporters of Kira and GregH are guilty of TREASON!

 
 

Porot ovat s?p?j?.

Heh heh. Porot ovat ruoka. Marie on s?p?j? (mutta h?n on ?lyk??pi?).

Where were your relatives from?

 
 

Greg, how dare you suggest bringing another woman into our lives? Another woman, who can be seen much better on this page:
http://images.google.com/images?q=Kira%20Zalan&hl=en&lr=&c2coff=1&sa=N&tab=wi
Another woman… Aaiiiiiiiiiiiiii!

And I was doing to well just a few posts above. Marie said $25.

 
 

Oh come on guys, Kira’s got a lot, but she doesn’t go mental or plagiarize every few days like clockwork.

Does she? I mean, I’m willing to be schooled here.

 
 

Kira’s just a pretty face, guys. Marie’s got body AND soul.

 
 

Scroll down to the bottom of the PeePoo homepage and you’ll notice that MJ’ has been Photoshopping again. Or just go here:
http://www.bunnycat.net/crows.jpgLooks like maybe someone’s confusing Casting Crowns with Counting Crows.Next time MJ’ decides to make someone a “featured artist” she might want to spell their name correctly.

 
 

Looks like she’s here! Everybody look sharp!

 
 

Gavin, they were from all over, but the one I was speaking of was from near Kittila. Have you ever had reindeer? I’ve had venison, but I can’t say for sure I’ve had reindeer. Maybe years ago when I was too young to appreciate Marie.

By the way, I sure hope Marie doesn’t know Finnish, because we’d sure be in trouble if she did 🙂

 
 

Mattila for mine. Never have had it, no.

Marie’s in the house, btw. Either her or Celticgirl; it’s unclear.

 
 

She’s here? Oh Marie, I wasn’t doing anything with Kira. It’s not what it looks like; you’re the only woman for me. Plus, you said $25.

Oh Marie, don’t give Gavin trouble for talking about you being an ?lyk??pi?. He was only trying to compliment you, just like I do when I call you a butterbrain. Your face is so nice, just like Louhi’s daughter.

 
 

Marie’s in the house, btw. Either her or Celticgirl; it’s unclear.

Have we ever seen them together in the same place?

 
 

What are the people saying about Kira?

GavinM: Kira’s got a lot

BradR: a pretty face

Wha?: When she gets blitzed (and you know she does) and the panties come flying off (and you know they do), I wouldn’t mind being the guy in the room with her.

Alan Canada: Kira is definitely hotter. She makes me Ayn Randy, if you know what I mean, and I think that you do!

Oh, FTLOG: a true fashion maven

 
 

DAMN YOU GREGH!!! You did it while she was here, too! You run this whole anti-Marie campaign, then make me look like a Kira-supporter when Marie gets here. You’re a cockblocker extraordinaire. You magnificent Bastard!

Marie:

Baby, honey, I was only trying to make gregh feel better when I said that. You can’t listen to him…he’s part of the MSM for God’s sake!

Oh, and have you ever worn the PeePo thong? I gotta know.

 
 

Wha?: When she gets blitzed (and you know she does) and the panties come flying off (and you know they do), I wouldn’t mind being the guy in the room with her.

Jesus, that’s classless.

 
 

Yes Wha?, that’s just classless like an Ideal Socialist Utopia….wah..wah…wah

(Actually I think the line deserves to be immortalized as a Wha? classic)

 
 

Yeah, Wha? really hit rock boner, er, bottom with that one.

 
 

I’m sure Kira’s panties just don’t come flying off willie-nilly. I have every confidence that she picks them up and neatly places them on the bedside table.

 
 

(I took a peek at the photo link provided by Ukko and I have to admit that Marie is definitely hotter.)

 
 

Satan attacks all of us in many ways, but perhaps his most vigorous assault is brought to bear upon our thoughts. What we think eventually makes us what we are. Our thoughts often lead to actions — and so the battleground is within our thoughts. Each of us is responsible for what we welcome into our mind.

Soo . . . Marie is telling us that Satan tells her to DO things.

I think she needs more help than even S,N! can give.

 
 

Could one of you Finn sharks please explain to me: Under what circumstances would I want to call someone a “nippleyard’s janitor” (N?nnipihan talonmies)?

 
 

“the Saami were regarded as great sorcerors with the power to control the weather, travel great distances in magical trances and shapeshift – usually into the form of a sea animal or bear.”

Wow, cool. Dang, I guess if you’re only 1/64 Saami you lose the shapeshifting gene. Otherwise I’d spend most of my time as an otter. That looks like a good time.

 
 

That’s GOLD, Jerry! GOLD!

 
 

There was supposed to be an “end Banya” tag after that.

 
 

I’d spend my time as Marie’s turtleneck.

 
 

I knew you’d come around. Who could resist such an exotic creature?

 
 

Great minds think alike — and mediocre minds, too!

 
 

Surely I’m going to hell for this, but…

I sent Marie a little note: What’d you do with the Sadly, Yes! site? I
thought it was wonderful. They really deserve a good dressing down. Filth!
Utter trash!

BTW, have you gotten a thong from the PP store yet? I’m kinda uneasy
ordering one. Are they comfortable?

And got a very personal response:
We are so sorry that you have the impression that our Website took any credit for Sadly Yes. They came to us and promised their humor would be totally fun and light. Sadly no we looked! However I’m sure you’ll enjoy our new Website that is under construction. This will be affiliated somewhat with People Political Website.
As to your question about thongs being comfortable. Try a pair. You will see no line in jeans. That is a very important thing to be concerned about in a time of war on terror I think about it often as I have my finger nails done. Oh, you are laughing I pray. I know you are laughing! The RIGHT SIDE type babes have a great sense of humor. We also take great care of our good looks and totally like healthy bodies. “God made woman beautiful for man.” “Man shall leave his home and cling unto his wife.” So God created man in His own image, in the image of God He created him;Male and female He created them. Genesis Chapter 1 v 27.
God bless you dear Ducky.Wear your new pair of thongs in good health. They are less expensive if you by seven pair at once. I guess it ties in with the seven days and creation . I guess that’s why you get a bargain low price by buying seven pair at time, not to mention one changes their dainties every day. If not than truly Sadly no on you!
Love In Him.
Marie Jon’ Biscotti
“Remember the Sabot day to keep it holy.”

Oh, she’s such a card!! Bless ‘er heart.

 
 

NO WAY!

 
 

WAY!!

 
 

Dan,

i think nipple-yard (n?nnipihan) means aureole. I don’t know for sure what it means to be a janitor or caretaker for an aureole, but I’d sure do it for Marie.

Heads up, FTLOG, you’ve given us an in! Marie doesn’t like the panty-lines and nasty seams. She might like these:
http://images.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://www.babyidea.fi/imetys/ovaali5.jpg&imgrefurl=http://www.babyidea.fi/imetys/ovaali.html&h=182&w=227&sz=8&tbnid=yC8_aoD4-JEJ:&tbnh=82&tbnw=103&hl=en&start=1&prev=/images%3Fq%3DN%25C3%25A4nnipihan%26svnum%3D10%26hl%3Den%26hs%3Dpll%26lr%3D%26c2coff%3D1%26client%3Dfirefox-a%26rls%3Dorg.mozilla:en-US:official%26sa%3DN

The best I can understand, these bra inserts don’t have annoying seams around the edges. (Does that sound right, Gavin? N?nnin tai n?nnipihan kohdalla ei ole Ovaaleissa lainkaan saumoja.)

 
 

I KNOW I’m going to hell. I just know it!!

 
 

Better link:
htt[://www.babyidea.fi/imetys/ovaali.html

I think these are pregnancy bra inserts, so I don’t know that I want to be involved with them and Marie. I chicken out, but that leavers her ALL to you!

 
 

My love for Marie is killing me. Try again.

http://www.babyidea.fi/imetys/ovaali.html

 
 

Dude, Oh FTLOG, write her back and ask her what size she wears. Tell her that she appears to be about the same size as your companion in Christ.

 
 

That is a real response?

 
 

If, indeed, that picture is really her – she’s hot. Is she single?

 
 

I… oy. Marie, you’re the greatest thing to happen to this website since Amber Pawlik’s barf-inducing pizza.

 
 

Marie, honey, can’t you even avoid plagiarizing in your emails? This quote is awful similar from here:

http://en.thinkexist.com/quotation/god_made_woman_beautiful_and_foolish-beautiful/179081.html

“God made woman beautiful and foolish; beautiful, that man might love her; and foolish, that she might love him.”

Marie, honey, look at me, You’re very, very foolish.

 
 

I sent her the definition of plagiarism (from dictionary.com) and this was her response and my response to her response:

> You certainly have your nerve.

I certainly do!

> What do you know about who I write for and whom I have to do with?

Er not much, entertainment of smart-asses like myself?

> I think you’ll find it very interesting who will be contributing writers on our new Website

Oh without a doubt but not in the way that you’re thinking I think.

>The caliber of religious writers and their names will be very much be in prominence.

Yeah I’m sure it will be, will you also be stealing material from them as well?

>How about you taking care of yourself.

I do! That’s how I start and finish my day.

>Sadly no, you are found in the balance wanting.

The rules state that if you say “Sadly no” on the web you have to include a link to Sadly, No! or else Brad TPs your house. Aside from that my site is hairyfishnuts and it’s unbalanced yet still wanting.

> http://www.gotquestions.org/sin-God-not-forgive.html

Yes, yes your sky god is very scary, pit of fire, endless poking by devils, I’ve watched enough Buffy the Vampire Slayer to get the gist of it.

So back to the plagiarism thing, you should understand that’s a very serious charge, especially if you’re doing anything like writing, which I assume is what you?re trying to do. Are you denying it?

> Happy Sabbath – Sabot or Lord’s Day.

Meh, I’ll just say TGIF!

> Thank You,
> Marie

No, no thank you! Your site has provided much giggles.

 
 

She’s so fly.

 
 

Supa Fly!

 
 

Dammit! Kira’s winning big right now. I think someone’s been throwing the vote.

 
 

Hey! How do y’all get the personal audience? OH FTLOG, how did she know you were female? Are you female? Did you lie? Somehow, lying to Marie seems especially cruel.

Wait a second…why did she sign Marie Jon’ Biscotti? Her last name is Marsala, unless she got married. Goddamnit, she BETTER not have gotten married!! Maybe it’s the name of her ex-husband.

Can one of you who she deighns to converse with ask her about that? Also, I want more thong-talk..can you arrange more thong-talk? Did you use the prettyproud address?

 
 

Yosef, don’t you worry your pretty little head. Marie Jon’ Biscotti has ways of fixing these little things. It’s in the bag, so to speak.

 
 

Wait, she went from Marsala to Biscotti? What is it with the Italian food?

 
 

Marie, darling, I have something for you. No, silly, it isn’t a nursing bra insert; it’s something better. Are you ready? Here it is:

My Present

When you can handle that, Marie, I think we should grab a little something to eat. Talk to you later, honey.

 
 

All of a sudden I’m hungry.

 
 

Marie Jon’ Linguini.

 
 

Marie Jon’ Bruschetta.

 
 

Yes, GregH is throwing the vote, hard – did you see his last campaign ad?!? Bastard.

Also, everyone that comes through here and decides they want to check out MJ’s site for a larf probably sees the poll and does their lefty duty by registering their opinion against racial profiling, not realizing that the cost of assuaging their conscience is the humiliating defeat of St. Marie Sexius at the hands of Kira and GregH. In this case the road to hell is indeed paved with good intentions.

Racial Profiling, People: It’s not as bad as that damned GregH!!

 
 

Marie Jon’ Meat-a-ball-a Sandwich-a.

 
 

OK this one kinda rhymes: Marie Jon’ Parmasean.

 
 

That’s pretty good.

Marie Jon’ Pasghetti.

 
 

How about Marie Jon’ Frappacino to wash it down?

 
 

They added in a 3rd answer on the poll – “not sure” Who will that one represent?

 
 

How about Ayn Clouter?

 
 

OK, I’ve got an even better one:

Marie Lasagn’a

 
 

Marie Jon’ Quattro Formaggio Pizza.

 
 

Hold on to your hats!! This thread is about to bust 100!! S,N record?

Indeed Marie Jon’ is a blessing!

 
 

Marie Maranthanzola?

 
 

She put up a third category? Is she even reading this?

Marie Jon’ :

Do you know what is at stake here? Throw the poll for god’s sake! Throw the poll!!

 
 

100, bitchez!!!

 
 

That’s it, Brad R! Satanen yksi. Satan has arrived.

 
 

Ukko –

That was a very weird and scary comment to be #100…

 
 

OK this one kinda rhymes: Marie Jon’ Parmasean

You mean, it’s Marie-zhon? I’ve been pronouncing it like Mary-John!

I don’t think she noticed, right? Oh, God, I’m so embarrassed.

 
 

Uhm, *I* had the 100th comment, thank you very much.

 
 

Right, Brad. I wouldn’t think of taking that honor from you. I was trying to say “the number one hundred one” in Finnish, but I’m not sure I got the grammar right. Anyway, “the number of one hundred” is “satanen” in Finnish.

 
 

wha?, if you’ll read what I sent her, you’ll see why she thinks I’m a female (which I AM). Here’s what I sent in response to her reply:

Marie:

Thanks for the laugh. Everybody needs to have a sense of humor during these trying times.

I am concerned, however, that things (political) have gotten out of control. Aren’t you afraid that with all the bellicose, fundamentalist communication we’re turning the faith-less away from a spiritual life? Shouldn’t we open our arms and welcome them into the bossom of our family? Isn’t that what “Love thy neighbor” really means?

I am utterly heartbroken by the divisive discourse occurring in this country and want to thank you for attempting to reach out to the poor souls.

Ducky

ps – thanks also for the advice on thongs. My boyfriend has been trying to get me in one (oh, a little play on words there!) for quite a while. We’ll see.

I can’t wait to see if she has a hissy fit over the “boyfriend” comment.

 
 

Sorry, Brad, my counter said 99, then I went back and saw Ukko’s ‘satan’ comment and natuarally assumed.

So, is Satan really here now with the 100th comment, or is that someone working on a Kaye Grogan peice that I smell?

 
 

Oh, FTLOG –

I don’t think she’ll say anything about the boyfriend comment. Kerry Marsla printed in one of her columns that her daughter (who may or may not be Marie Jon’ Marsala Biscotti) was a single mother, so I don’t think she’ll throw stones on that one.

 
 

I’m in the middle of working on a Christian Worldview Test, actually. Should be up in the next half hour…

 
 

Kerry is not Marie’s mom. We e-mailed Kerry, and she told us she had no idea who Marie was.

 
 

At yet strangely Kerry appears as one of the columnists on Marie’s site. You’d think that there’d be some level of knowingness.

 
 

Brad –

Ummm….what did you expect her to say? I wouldn’t claim the little plagarizing vixen, either (well, not as my daughter).

It seems like a very odd coincidence that Marie Jon’ Marsala is a christian-wingnut web-writer, and Kerry Marsala is a christian-wingnut web-writer, and they link each other, endorse each other, etc. That Kerry M. runs a wingnut site with her Mom that links to MJ Marsala, but the two aren’t related.

I’ll allow that maybe they aren’t.

 
 

I can only contribute two random comments here, since this thread has devolved into a hodgepodge of Finnish profanity, plays on Marie’s name, and a bunch of other stuff I don’t even understand, and so I’m not really qualified to play. BUT, (1) “parmesan” is pronounced, oddly enough, “par-me-san,” not “par-me-zhan,” and(2) I would never have guessed that the product of asexual-yet-still-unholy reproduction between Neve Campbell and Janeane Garofalo could turn out to be a PLAGIARIST!

 
 

Neve and Janeane? Now that does sound hot!

Something has been bothering me about Marie’s picture though. It’s seems so familiar. Like I said earlier she does remind me of an ex-girlfriend but there’s more to it than that. I get the feeling that I’ve seen her on TV. Perhaps as one of Jerry Seinfeld’s girlfriends?

 
 

If that’s not really Marie, I’m defaulting back to my “covey of contracted Indian web-content providers” theory.

That picture does look familiar, though.

 
 

Lucy, not all the Finnish was profanity, it sounded like it 🙂

 
 

Ukko, my apologies to your lovely language. I remembered the disgusting-Finnish-profanity contest from the other day and assumed y’all were comparing swears. May a sampo park itself next to your home and remain there for eternity, pouring out blessings and cash. (that’s a homemade Finnish-style wish by way of southern Europe. I’m not sure what a sampo is, but I saw it in a movie on Mystery Science Theater once, and they couldn’t figure out what it was, either, except it was something very good.)

 
 

not all the Finnish was profanity

There were some pronouns and articles in there for grammar’s sake, certainly.

 
 

Lucy, sorry if you didn’t like the swearing. Gavin and I were having fun.

Your blessing is very nice. The sampo comes from the Finnish national epic, the Kalevala. You can read about it here:
Kalevala extract

It’s basically like a mill that churns out everything you need, a bringer of all good things.

 
 

Mine’s been broken ever since I asked it to make giant death robots.

 
 

There’s also the Opmas. You don’t want one of those; nothing good ever comes of it.

 
 

(1) “parmesan” is pronounced, oddly enough, “par-me-san,” not “par-me-zhan,”

You know, I just realised that I pronounce it par-me-san when I say “parmesan cheese”, but par-me-zhan when use it by itself. But, the English, she is not my mother tongue, eh?

 
 

Ukko, I didn’t mind the swearing! My tone may have given you the impression that I did, but I was trying to be funny. 🙂 Please, go right ahead and enjoy yourselves. I’m just amazed that there are more than a couple of people here at S,N! who speak Finnish! Did you all go to the same Finnishing school, hahhaha!? ~The End~

 
 

Gavin: so it’s Sampo good, Opmas bad. Gosh, I hope I don’t get them mixed up in an emergency someday!!

 
 

125, bitchez!!!

 
 

Did you all go to the same Finnishing school, hahhaha!? ~The End~

*snick*. I’ve never laughed so much in one thread in my life as in this one.

I think, rather ominously, that a few of us are either from, or well-acquainted with, the rich, Finno-North American Empire that stretches from Michigan’s Upper Peninsula through Northern Ontario, where I grew up. I’m not Finnish, but where I lived, we had a street called Tuottelen Avenue. We snickered and called it “the Twat.”…ha ha ha.

We also had Estonians, so like it was a double-mint kind of thing; a combo-flavour of Finno-Ugrians.

 
 

There are also Finns in Minnesota, Washington, and Oregon as well as many other areas. The first Finns came in, I think, the 1600s with the Swedes to found New Sweden, which didn’t last long, but brought the traditional log cabin to America. So you could say my ancestors are in part responsible for Abe Lincoln but also the Log Cabin Repiglicans. Many of the Finns in the US were at one time very political and associated with socialist movements. One of the few people to be lynched in Minnesota was a Finn, when Finns weren’t very popular due to their ethnicity and liberal politics.

The Estonians cheat, because they can understand Finn, but a Finn can’t understand Estonian. Estonian is like a shortened Finn.

Just remember, you can always tell a Finn, but you can’t tell him much.

 
 

Opmas? I saw one once at a chocolate factory. Never trusted the little bastards, what with all the singing and disappearing children.

 
 

In a shocking development, Marie and racial profiling are currently at 98% of the vote. Quite a turn around from a few hours ago. Christ moves in mysterious ways.

Marantha!

 
 

Did anyone else notice that MJ took down the masthead with all the pictures of the contributors? I’m not sure what good it did, since she still includes them with the columns.

Geez. If you guys keep this up the poor gal won’t have a site left.

 
 

Wha?, first thing I thought of was Oompa Loompas too.

 
 

Whoooooohooooo!! I knew the people would do what was right. I’m sure my message to her re: Throw the Damn Poll didn’t have anything to do with it, either.

In your face, SwiftGregH’s for Truth!

 
 

It was Rove, I should have never listened to that idiot. Condi! Condi! Bring me Rove’s head on a Pike!

 
 

{sniff, sniff}
{whimper}
Why does she do this to me? I haven’t heard from Marie in, like, 5 hours! I sure hope she hasn’t found out that about…us.

 
 

Oh my poor Lil’ Ducky. Let’s go have a spa day and forget all about that dumb ole’ Marie Jon’ Biscotti Marsala.

 
 

Oh Marie, I have learned something about you that sends me into horrible inner turmoil My pikku puinen poika is standing at full attention, but my larger boy is let down. Marie, you who proclaim yourself a born-again Christian, are loose. That’s it: loose.

I know you tried to keep it hidden, but you couldn’t keep it hidden from me. I sneaked into the hidden parts of your home (page) to see what type of sheets you use and discovered your secret.

Here at Sadly, No, we use Transitional, which is for those who aren’t slutty, but aren’t virgins either. The web daddies tell us we should be strict, but you Marie chose to be loose.

Go to http://www.w3.org/TR/html4/loose.dtd to see that the web daddies tell us, “Authors should use the Strict DTD when possible, but may use the Transitional DTD when support for presentation attribute and elements is required.” That means the daddies want us to be sexually strict, but they will understand if we don’t remain virgins until our wedding night. But under no circumstances do daddies want their little daughters to be loose, to be sluts.

I rebuke you, Marie. Be kind to the web daddies, stop being loose, and live chaste in your hypertext and stylish sheets before the Lord.

 
 

whoa, she is quite a hottie… except for the whole right wing extremist thingy.

 
 

My pikku puinen poika

Peter Pekka’s got a palli for a peck o’ persett??

God, look what’s happened to us. We’re degenerating into subhuman creatures, only several notches above the Russians…

 
 

(pssssst, Mr. Marie-is-my-one-and-only [aka Wha?] is posting comments on KIRA’S SITE!)

 
 

Well, we all know it takes about six dirty Russki aggresors to equal one Finn. 400k vs 66k casualties in the Winter War.

As far as the persett?, I say persett? tai vittu, I have a pystytt?minen. I’m not sure where exactly the stool comes from, but you might call me a tripod, execept for the pikku part.

 
 

Winter War Casualties again

Greg, now that we know Marie is loose, I think we can all share her. And, lo, peace did reign in the house of Peepole, and the woman of the house did verily bring pleasure onto many.

 
 

Have you ever heard the story about the Finnish Jews and the SS battalion? That’s not a joke, btw. There’s this story I heard — if you know it, you’ll know which one I mean.

 
 

I know the Finns didn’t like the Nazis and their anti-Semitism (only accepted German help out of necessity), but I didn’t hear the story you’re talking about. What happened?

 
 

I haven’t been able to source it, but according to the story, the Finnish authorities ‘hid’ a number of Jews by commissioning them into an SS unit. Berlin was apparently furious.

 
 

Well, I had to drop in on this little confab–what a relatively astonishing number of comments. It’s practically as though S,N! had turned into, oh, I don’t know, Balloon Juice over night or something. Not that I can add much to discussions about Finnish and the sexual harassment of female wingnuts. *Ahem*. That all said, I can’t stay up too late tonight, ‘cos tomorrow begins Northalsted Market Days, which I’m planning to mill about in. The musical acts this year don’t do too much for me. Last year, my favouritist gay punk band, Pansy Division, was there and fun was had by all.

 
 

Last year, my favouritist gay punk band, Pansy Division, was there and fun was had by all.

Love ’em, btw.

But about this ‘sexual harassment’… Now, this is a woman who made a fair bit of hay by accusing certain parties around here of bestiality and other sundry and divers things.

And then popped into comments all like, “You should see me in my hot pink bikini.”

I frankly felt very harassed, and I think I speak for all of us in saying that we need not stand for such threats against our personal safety.

 
 

That’s right, GregH. I can’t stop myself – I’m cuckoo for winger-gals (except she-who-will-not-be-named-K.). Plus, I didn’t know which way Marie was going to end up pushing the poll, so I wanted to cover all my bases.

 
 

That’s just classless.

 
 

Avoids tricky issues of class…

 
 

150, bitchez!!!

 
 

Wha? Do I have to chase you around the entire interwebs to make sure that you’re not slandering me?

 
 

GregH –

Yes. But it was all meant in good fun.

I’m kinda bored with it all now, though.

So….what’s the weather like up there?

 
 

I think that extending copy right beyond 15 years is against God’s will.

I read that substantial parts of Genesis are copied, without attribution, from Mesopotamian sources — the natural law does not recognize unlimited intelectual property, hence copying passages from other peoples, especially if more than 15 years after the original publication, is not a theft.

However, there is still a question of an un-fulfilled promise of photos in a hot pink bikini. Lord frowns upon making unfulfilled promises.

 
 

Hee hee! Hey MJ, all it takes is a blockquote tag and an attribution, babe. You could get Gavin off your ass just like *that*. But I’m beginning to suspect you like him there. How else could you so effectively feed your ‘I’m Being Martyred for Christians Everywhere’ jones?

 
 

I’m afraid I may be busted. I’ve never been good at covering my tracks, so it wouldn’t have been hard.

*sigh*

I’ll let you know if my “friendship” w/ Marie survives.

 
 

Wha?, I know you was just fooling. Who shall we annoy next?

 
 

GregH –

I dunno. We’ll have to wait and see who comes along. Kira should be pretty upset about Marie throwing the poll against her, so maybe she’ll want a rematch, or something. That might be fun.

Otherwise, it might be fun to go after Virgin Ben, but he’s probably kind of hard to get to. Does he have an email? Maybe a forum attached to his column?

 
 

You can always work on the profile at the ConservativeMatch.com. The username is SalLeno, password KayeGrogan…

 
 

Also, Marie’s back. She was just in the Flat Tax thread.

 
 

Um, how’s my hair?

 
 

wha?, you’re right that the Vee Ben is hard to get into. Have you ever tried penetrating an ass that tight? He’s gotta learn to relaaaax.

 
 

In honor of the V-ky-Ben, let’s hear from our misognystic friend Eminem with “Ass Like That”

The way you shake it, I can’t believe it
I ain’t never seen an ass like that
The way you move it, you make my pee pee go
Doing, doing, doing

I don’t believe it, it’s almost too good to be true
I ain’t never seen an ass like that
The way you move it, you make my pee pee go
Doing, doing, doing

Respek, V wit da K an’ Ben wit da Y, grease up, baby!

 
 

“Plagiarism is necessary. Progress implies it.”
– Isidore-Lucien Ducasse (Comte de Lautr?amont), 1846-1870

Here’s a defence for Marie — given that it comes from a Paris Communard, do you think she’ll use it?

 
 

Hey guys, I was out all weekend. Did I miss anything?

 
 

Gavin M, the inflection you’re looking for is “vitusta”. When something is “vitusta”, it’s commonly understood to be unsatisfactory. On the other hand, if you’re attempting to get into one – and who isn’t? – you’re going “vittuun”.

Ukko, “101” translates as “satayksi”. “101st” is, logically enough, “sadasensimm?inen”. “Satanen” means a hundred euro bill or, colloquially, a hundred meter dash.

Finally, the story about hiding Jews from the Germans in an SS batallion sounds highly suspect. Jewish Finns fought in the regular Finnish military.

 
 

166 bitchez!

 
 

Also, “Tuottelen Avenue” roughly translates as “I’m Doing Some Producing Avenue”.

 
 

You on this blog assume much as well as make up all sorts of false accusations without full knowledge of what you bring attention as to other’s foibles. There are two sides to all situations. However mean spirited and so far left as you are I’ll not give you any accountabilities. Mr.Ken Wade from VOP.com has not one thing in common with your ilk. You know dip nothing about a lot of things. You have a very long history of attacking and lying about anyone that is not if your kind. But then why should I be shocked . You have no (fears respect) even for a living God. Your remarks fall short from the truth. You people have nothing better to do but blog .PLEASE CONTINUE GIVEING ME MORE WEB TRAFFIC! Some just might start taking http://www.VOP.com Bible studies.Did you enjoy your American greeting card? Goodness, I spoil you way to much.Have a wonderful week.
Kisses & Hugs
Marie
LAUGHING AND PRAYING YOU HOME
“For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish, but have eternal life.” (John 3:16)

 
 

Hi Marie, will you answer my response to your earlier post about you praying for us? Couldn’t it be said that your proselytizing shows a lack of humility and sense of cultural superiority, even if not intended?

Nimi, thanks for the help with Finnish. Not much Finnish has percolated down from my grandparents to me; just a few words and phrases.

 
 

What I love is the tag line at the bottom of the People Political site:

(c)2005 People Political.org All Rights Reserved. Any Duplication is Prohibited by Law.

Any duplication is prohibited by law? Reeeeallly?

 
 

“Dip nothing”?

 
 

Is the ACLU Bin Laden’s Best Ally?
Friday, August 05, 2005
By Bill O’Reilly
PHOTOS VIDEO

Click image to enlarge
ARCHIVE SHOW INFO
?Is the ACLU Bin Laden’s Best Ally?
August 05, 2005?Far-Left Crisis?
August 04, 2005?God vs. Science
August 03, 2005?A Tale of Two Terrorists
August 02, 2005?The Senate Slaps the ACLU
July 28, 2005?More Trouble On The Left….
July 27, 2005?Those Who Help the Terrorists…
July 26, 2005?Let’s Talk About Terror in Britain…
July 25, 2005?The Politics of Terror…
July 22, 2005?Why Judge Roberts Will Be Confirmed…
July 21, 2005?Why Do School Officials Hurt Poor Children?
July 20, 2005?Is Karl Rove a Hero?
July 19, 2005?Karl Rove vs. the Liberal Media…
July 18, 2005?It Just Can’t Get Much Hotter In Aruba…
July 15, 2005?Memo to a Judge
July 14, 2005?Investigating Karl Rove
July 13, 2005?Anti-American Danger
July 12, 2005?Media Coverage of the London Bombings
July 10, 2005?Failure To Deal With The Deadly Enemy
July 08, 2005?Reaction to President Bush’s Iraq Speech
June 30, 2005?On the Defensive
June 28, 2005?What you, the folks, think about Gitmo
June 24, 2005?Anti-‘Factor’ Folks
June 23, 2005?The Smearing of Dick Durbin
June 22, 2005?The Truth About Hillary Clinton…
June 21, 2005?Losing the Will to Fight Terrorism
June 20, 2005?Senator Dick Durbin Slams His Own Country
June 17, 2005?What Do The New York Times & the Mafia Have In Common?
June 16, 2005?Jesse Jackson Exploiting MJ
June 15, 2005?Not Guilty!
June 14, 2005?Why America Cares About Natalee Holloway
June 10, 2005?Trouble on the Left
June 09, 2005?Giving Money To Poor Africans…
June 08, 2005?The Truth About Guantanamo Bay…
June 07, 2005?The Jackson Verdict
June 06, 2005?Miscarriage of Justice
June 03, 2005?Blowing the Whistle on Powerful People
June 02, 2005?Getting Americans Killed
June 01, 2005?Amnesty International Declares War on the USA
May 26, 2005?Do Captured Terrorists Have Rights?
May 25, 2005
No surprise, a New York chapter of the ACLU (search) is suing the police for searching bags in the subway system. We knew this would happen because the ACLU has opposed nearly every anti-terror measure authorities have come up with since 9/11.

Here’s how nuts this organization is: The ACLU opposes allowing the feds to have floating wiretaps that would monitor cell phone conversations of suspected terrorists. It opposes American civilians assisting the border patrol ? you remember the ACLU went to Arizona to monitor the Minutemen (search). It opposes profiling of suspected terrorists. It opposes military tribunals to try captured terrorists. It opposes coerced interrogations of captured terrorists. It has demanded that more pictures of Americans abusing prisoners at Abu Ghraib (search) be released, knowing that would help Al Qaeda (search) recruitment.

The ACLU opposes the sharing of information about suspected terrorists and sued to stop New York state from participating in MATRIX, the Multistate Anti-terrorism Information Exchange.

“Talking Points” could go on and on, but you get the picture. If the ACLU ever wants money, it should contact the Al Qaeda fundraisers. No organization in America enables terrorism as much as the ACLU, period. It is putting your life in danger. And that is no exaggeration.

Unfortunately, there’s nothing we can do about it. No way to stop it. The ACLU operates within the law and uses the legal system to oppose the war on terror. And there are enough loony judges around to give that organization power, especially here in New York City and in San Francisco.

The only thing we can do is hold people who raise and give money to the ACLU accountable. In the weeks to come, “The Factor” will tell you who these people and organizations are, so you can decide whether or not you want to do business with them.

There are many issues I struggle with on this program, trying to decide what’s right and what’s wrong so I can present a cogent analysis to you. But the ACLU’s opposition to all anti-terror measures is not one of those issues. This is a dangerous organization. The evidence of that is overwhelming.

And that’s the Memo.

The Most Ridiculous Item of the Day

The Internet site Worldnet Daily has posted ad letter written by Senator Edward Kennedy (search) way back in 1971. The letter says that Senator Kennedy believed that a fetus was human from, “the very moment of conception.”

Well, since Senator Kennedy is one of the most ardent abortion supporters in the country, many Americans are curious about this letter. We called Senator Kennedy’s office today, and he said there’s no problem. The senator is personally against abortion, but he also wants women to have the right to choose. If this is a contradiction or not, you can decide.

If you want to see the entire text of the letter, and it’s very interesting, you can go to WorldnetDaily.com. Ridiculous? Read the letter and make the call.

?You can watch Bill O’Reilly’s “Talking Points Memo” and “Most Ridiculous Item” weeknights at 8 and 11 p.m. ET on the FOX News Channel. Send your comments to: oreilly@foxnews.com

 
 

?Over There?, it is more like Over Where?
By Tony Spain

After watching FX?s new drama about an Army Squad in Iraq called ?Over There? I concluded about the only thing they got right were the uniforms.

As someone who has been over there it was easy to see that this new show was nothing more than a well produced, visually stimulating, Steven Bochco, Hollywood creation that takes a sharp left turn from reality.

Now I understand that this is a Hollywood production and some military tactics are changed for a more dramatic effect. Which is why I am not going to mention the mistakes made in dialogue and military tactics used in the show. However, Steven Bochco?s depiction of the war scenarios and the character setups are bias and false.

Let us begin with the scenario. In FX?s ?Over There? an Army squad, lead by Sgt. Scream is dug in and holding their ground around a mosque while officers negotiate with terrorists inside. An Al Jazeera reporter is inside the mosque with terrorists broadcasting live which is the reason for the negotiations. (Al Jazeera has been kicked out of Iraq indefinitely by the Iraqi National Government by the way).

Sgt. Scream, complains that they are stuck holding their ground so some General can look good on TV. So there they are dug in for thirty six hour siege while officers in Baghdad drink their coffee in the green zone, play to the media and negotiate with terrorists.

In the real war, the commanders on the ground would have returned fire, the mosque would have been hit hard and probably destroyed before anyone could figure out what was going on. The following day, the news media would be drilling the military about how they destroyed a mosque and killed an Al Jazeera reporter. The Arab world would scream bloody murder and the anti war left would demand that Sgt. Scream and his squad be investigated for war crimes because they killed a group of surrendering terrorists.

That is what would happen in the real war, as has been shown in places like Fallujah. But showing what really happens and how the media operates in Iraq is not what Hollywood wants. To show that the military made the right decision would make the media and anti- war left look bad.

So, it seems that ?Over There? has created somewhat of a double standard or a catch 22 for the military. This double standard can only be achieved by ignoring reality. ?Over There? takes a sharp left turn from reality by portraying to the viewers an incompetent military that lacks the ability to make strong, swift, aggressive decisions in a combat zone. In reality the military does make quick, aggressive decisions only to be questioned and condemned by the news media as using excessive force. So the media will criticize you for taking action and Hollywood criticizes you for not taking action.

It also appears that Steven Bochco, like his liberal friends, believe that everyone enlists in the military to run away from some problem or ends up in the military as a last resort. Just like the left he tries to depict the military as lower class service.

Private Bo Rider was a high school football star from Texas. He got a partial scholarship to Texas A&M, but his family was too poor to afford the rest of the cost. So he joined the Army for the GI Bill. If Private Rider was good enough to get into one of the biggest powerhouses in college football on a partial scholarship he surely could have gotten a free ride from say the University of Northern Texas. The Army was hardly his last or only option.

Private Frank Dumphy, a graduate of Cornell University ends up in an infantry unit. If a soldier has the brains to graduate from Cornell then he would have scored high enough on the ASVAB test that would have put him anywhere in the Army he wanted to go. The only way that he ends up in this infantry squad is if he specifically volunteered to be there. It is never explained why he is in the infantry unit, he just claims to be stupid. It is not until the next episode that we find out he is stupid because he enlisted because of 9-11.

Private Avery King is an intelligent African American from Arkansas. He joined the Army because he was too embarrassed to go back home after failing to make a choir. It could happen I suppose, but there are hardly any African Americans in infantry units in the Army. Most avoid the infantry picking jobs that require technical training to better themselves when they become civilians again.

Private Maurice Williams is from the streets of Compton. He is in the army fighting the white man. The racist white man seems to be his main enemy in this show. I have been in the Army for 3 years and I have yet too see one problem arise from racism.

Private First Class Esmerlda Del Rio is one of two females on the show. She is in a motor transport unit and somehow always finds herself in the action. There are female soldiers who go outside the wire but most are in civil affair units. Even then females outside of the wire is rare.

Finally we have Private Brenda Mitchell. She is also in a motor transport unit who happens to be there when the action starts. Her background is really not given other than she is from a small town from Kansas. I am willing to bet if we ever find out anything about her background story it will be that she enlisted in the military because there just wasn?t any other alternatives for her.

In reality most of the infantry are white and they come from middle to upper middle class families. Approximately half of them went to college for at least a year and some even have a bachelors degree. Some left establish careers because they saw a greater cause than themselves after 9-11 and decided to do something about it like I did. I didn?t enlist to run from a problem or because I was down on my luck. I took a significant pay cut to help fight the war on terror. I enlisted because I watched our country suffer the worst attack in its history. I enlisted because I wanted to fight the war not because I wanted the college money or because the military was my last resort. Sure there are some that enlisted to get away from hardship but they are definitely not a majority.

Just like the media ?Over There? reminds us that war is hell in an over exaggerated fashion. Just like the news media it seems to me that ?Over There? is the continuous attempt to influence the American people with bad news from Iraq, even if the story line is inaccurate.

I guess I should have realized how bad it was going to be when the New York Times called it ?uncompromising? and the rest of the media followed suit.

If people want to know what it is like over there maybe they should talk to someone who has been over there. Something it appears Steven Bochco has never done and if he did he didn?t pay attention.

?Over There? a negative portrayal of our military, the war itself and it is a slap in the face and a kick in the groin to our military. So many people in our society have a hard time separating fantasy from reality and ?Over There? does nothing to help them.

?Over There?, it is more like Over Where?

I?m Tony Spain and I have been over there.
Good Night.

SADLY NO GOOD COMES OUT OF THE LEFT! OH? Did I say That? I meant The bad LEFTISTS people who need GOD need to wise up! Their minds, words are killing us! SUPPORT YOUR TROOPS!

 
 

Hey, Marie —
I need to look something up in the phonebook for Seattle, WA. Would you mind copying and pasting that into the comments section here? Thanks. Just the white pages book will be fine. Thanks again

 
 

Marie, I really don’t know what you’re trying to do, but you definitely aren’t furthering your effort of evangelizing me.

I can’t figure out what this is supposed to mean, “Private Avery King is an intelligent African American from Arkansas.” As in, we need to qualify this with “intelligent,” because most other black Arkansans are a little slow? wtf?

Marie, if you’re sincere about witnessing for your faith, you should lie low for a year and try to learn a little more about the real message of Jesus. Here are a few hints: 1) He looked more like an Arab than like you 2) He focussed on better things than bombing Mecca and suppressing the gays.

 
 

Funds of a Bronx Youth Group Allegedly Lent to Air America
BY DAVID LOMBINO – Special to the Sun
August 1, 2005

The top executive at a Bronx youth organization said yesterday that the former director of Air America Radio received more than $800,000 in loans for himself and the radio network from the nonprofit organization while serving as its development director.

Some of the transfers, according to the president of the Bronx-based Gloria Wise Boys & Girls Club organization’s executive committee, Jeannette Graves, occurred when the development director, Evan Montvel Cohen, who for a time served simultaneously as the liberal radio network’s director, appealed to the organization for two loans worth $35,000. Another member of the executive committee said Mr. Cohen told the executive director of the organization that he needed the money to pay for chemotherapy for himself and other medical expenses for his ill father.

Ms. Graves said that Mr. Cohen also received another $213,000 loan for Air America in a check that was approved without her authorization and stamped with an imprint of her signature, and that the club wired more than $400,000 to him without her knowledge.

Mr. Cohen, who no longer is employed by either Air America or Gloria Wise, and who has not been charged with a crime, could not be reached for comment.

Air America Radio, launched with some fanfare on March 31, 2004, is carried on dozens of stations. It probably is best known for its program host Al Franken, the liberal comedian, writer, and political gadfly.

Some of the allegations about Mr. Cohen and Air America have appeared in published reports in the past several weeks, including articles in the New York Post, the Daily News, and the Washington Times, as well as postings on Michelle Malkin’s blog and the Radio Equalizer, but Ms. Graves provided The New York Sun with much more extensive details of the allegations.

In June, the city’s Department of Investigation announced the suspension of city grants and contracts with Gloria Wise, worth millions of dollars, because of allegations, among others, that its officials had approved “significant inappropriate transactions and falsified documents that were submitted to various city agencies.”

The current parent corporation of Air America is Piquant LLC, with offices on Park Avenue. On May 24, 2004, Piquant acquired Air America from Progress Media. Piquant said in a statement last week that Progress was the entity to which the Gloria Wise loans went, and that it has been defunct since May 2004. Piquant said Mr. Cohen has not had any affiliation with the radio network since that point.

“The current owners of Air America Radio have no obligation to Progress Media’s business activities,” the statement read. “We are very disturbed that Air America Radio’s good name could be associated with a reduction in services for young people, which is why we agreed months ago to fully compensate the Gloria Wise Boys & Girls Club as a result of this transaction.”

Ms. Graves said Air America has agreed in writing to pay back the full amount of more than $800,000 in installments over the next two years. It is unclear whether the funds allegedly obtained from Gloria Wise were ultimately received or spent by Air America.

Ms. Graves said Gloria Wise is fully cooperating with the Department of Investigation. She said that thanks to contracts and funds secured from other entities, it is “business as usual” for all of the organization’s social programs, which serve 20,000 children, elderly residents, and people with disabilities in the Co-op City section of the Bronx.

In 2003, Gloria Wise reported receiving more than $3.7 million in government grants and more than half a million dollars in government contracts. It reported spending a total of more than $4.5 million that year.

A spokeswoman for the Department of Investigations, Emily Gest, said the organization does not comment on continuing investigations.

Mr. Cohen, 39, was co-founder of Progress Media Inc. He left Air America in May 2004 – at which time he remained in the employ of the Boys & Girls Club. In 2003, he was paid more than $74,000 as Gloria Wise’s development director, according to the organization’s filings with the Internal Revenue Service.

In telephone interviews yesterday, several members of the executive committee of Gloria Wise remembered the shock they felt learning last month about the scandal.

One member of the executive committee, Anna Capell, 80, said she feared answering the phone or attending a scheduled meeting of the committee as a result of anxiety that she would be investigated or sued.

“I’m still rocking from the experience,” Ms. Capell said.

Initially, members of the executive committee viewed Mr. Cohen fondly because he had thrown a tremendously successful fund-raising affair for Gloria Wise in Manhattan last year. They recalled being impressed by the wealthy clientele and the large sums of money he raised, according to Ms. Graves.

Because of that confidence in Mr. Cohen, she said, the executive committee approved two loans to Air America, one for $80,000 and another for $87,000.

Ms. Capell said she had met Mr. Cohen several times.

“He was very suave, a very wonderful young man. He left a very favorable impression,” she said in a telephone interview.

After the initial two loans, Ms. Graves said that just before the launch of Air America her organization lent the network another $213,000, authorized with a rubber stamp of her signature on a document she said she never saw. More recently, Ms. Graves said, Gloria Wise made a wire transfer of at least $400,000 to Air America without her knowledge.

In addition, according to Ms. Graves, the longtime executive director of Gloria Wise, Charles Rosen, later told the board he had lent an additional $35,000 of the organization’s funds to Mr. Cohen for medical expenses. According to Ms. Capell, the board member, Mr. Cohen told Mr. Rosen he needed $25,000 to pay for chemotherapy. Mr. Cohen told associates that he recovered from brain cancer, according to Ms. Capell. Later, Mr. Cohen asked for $10,000 – which he was lent – be cause his father, a businessman in Asia, was “gravely ill,” Ms. Capell said.

Ms. Graves said that she knew of the personal loans to Mr. Cohen, but that she thought they were taken from Mr. Rosen’s personal discretionary budget, “not the agency’s.”

Mr. Rosen could not be reached for comment.

Gloria Wise received personal checks in various amounts from Mr. Cohen to pay back some of the loans, but Ms. Graves said the checks did not clear. The executive committee dismissed him when members learned of some of his actions, according to another member of the executive committee, John Rose.

While she spoke critically of Mr. Cohen, Ms. Graves said she thought Mr. Rosen performed exceptionally well as the organization’s executive director. According to Ms. Graves, Mr. Rosen, 62, helped the organization’s annual budget grow from $175,000 into the millions. He recently resigned.

According to IRS filings Mr. Rosen earned nearly $148,000 in 2003 from the Gloria Wise organization for working approximately 23 hours a week as executive director. Previously, Mr. Rosen worked as a typographer for the New York Post and was active in union politics, leading a rent strike in Co-op City in the early 1970s.

August 1, 2005 Edition > Section: New York > Printer-Friendly Version

 
 

Seb, Brad, or Gavin, is the poster above really Marie? If so, she has really lost it and is making me consider Turing machines. Her random postings here have nothing more to do with the discussion than the following does:

“When the population is normal the sampling distribution will also be normal, but the use of s to replace s is not that accurate. The smaller the sample size the worse the approximation will be. Hence we can expect that some adjustment will be made based on the sample size. The adjustment we make is that we do not use the normal curve for this approximation. Instead, we use the Student t distribution that is based on the sample size. We proceed as before, but we change the table that we use. This distribution looks like the normal distribution, but as the sample size decreases it spreads out. For large n it nearly matches the normal curve. We say that the distribution has n – 1 degrees of freedom.”
http://www.ltcconline.net/greenl/courses/201/Estimation/confIntMean.htm

 
 

Marie Jon’ os obviously trying to break the comments here at Sadly, No! by pasting in these huuuuge, gianormous articles from hither and yon. Firstly, Marie, hon’, brevity works in one’s favor in a comments section. Pasting in several-thousand-word-long articles tends to lose the audience. I know you’re reticent to simply use your own words, in fear that you’ll be mocked. but really, we’ll mock you regardless. Do not pass “go,” do not collect $200.

 
 

Hey Marq, since she won’t post original comments here any more I found this comment posted on a Live8 forum for our mocking pleasure:

God bless all these artist that took their time to help Africa. President G. W. Bush and Tony Blair are up for putting and end to the mayhem going on in Africa.
I’ll really be impressed when all of the artist get their tushes over to Iraq and Afghanistan to give the coalition troops a big extravaganza and raise some money for all of those brave men and woman that are there doing a seller job protecting America, as well as the word from terrorist. Let your politics be damed! Joan Jet plays for the troops.
Marie Jon’
http://www.PeoplePolitical.org
Comment from peoplepolitical1 – 7/5/05 1:19 AM

 
 

Heh, Marie said “tushes.”

 
 

…for all of those brave men and woman that are there doing a seller job protecting America, as well as the word from terrorist.

Um, a “seller” job? Does she mean “stellar” or “cellar?” Also, while one could interpret that bit about protecting the word from terrorist[s] to mean protecting the world, I have a scary feeling that she means the Word.

 
 

It’s like every sentence provides a precious little gem ripe for the mocking. Did you notice that she “damed” politics.

 
 

183, bitchez!!!!

 
 

If Wha?, Ukko and Yosef were still here we’d have this over 200 – no problem.

 
 

It would only take 15 more….

 
 

Here’s to 186. Whoever hits 200 gets a special treat from Marie. You lost out on the poll, GregH, but here’s your chance! Hyva poika. Istu. Hyva tyta.

 
 

Marie can’t even post her own bullshit in the comments. It is like she is in essence plagiarizing her comments. She has to post some douchebag thing about Air America- hey did you guys see that “Day by Day” cartoon- that’s the sub-Mallard Fillmore conservo strip. Vodkapundit gave it a triple “Heh-indeedy” the other day. So the Left has a war started on lies to whine about and the Right has smelly homeless people and Air America to whine about. These people. It is sad how cute she is though, I think she wants to date Gavin and “change” him.

 
 

Wait! I know, let’s have a Sadly, No! tournament! The winner gets to go out with MJ and undergo her very own personal “ex-Lefty” program. I will seriously stick a shiv in anyone who stands in my way. It will be like “Ultimate Lefty Computer Geek Fighting”

I think we could get:
Gavin M.
Brad R.
Yosef
wha?
Ukko
Pinko Punko
Marq

Who else wants a crack at 50 weeks of church going before you can even brush her unexposed neck with your fingertip?

 
 

ahem!

 
 

Sentence story time! I’ll start.

Dear Playboy,

I never imagined this happening to me, but this one summer at Vacation Bible School, I spotted a raven-haired little vixen named Marie.

Some one else’s turn.

 
 

Unfortunately, the Viagra supply for the entire City was bought up by a mysterious doctor on the behalf of a rotund Palm Beach talk show blowhard leaving Jeff-Seb, Gavin, Brad, Pinko Punko, Ukko, Wha?, Yosef and Pastor Swank on the sidelines while GregH was the only one left standing so to speak.

 
 

INTERLUDE- Thought that you might like this link link to a Sadly, Yes rerun hosted on Marie Jon’s site. The second entry down may be a little forshadowing as to how this “sentence” story ends. However, it’s not looking good for our hero right now. It’s also strange how this Sadly, Yes HTML ended up on Marie’s site since she had nothing to do with Sadly, Yes. Also if I was devious, I might monkey with the pictures a little bit more and provide a prominent link to them so as to entertain ourselves at the expense of our beloved Marie Jon’ a Biscotti.

 
 

As a fluffer, Marie saw those many limp soldiers as a professional challenge.

 
 

Ah, a sadly incomplete effort by Marie Jon’. Though she’s tempting you with her picture, the little hussy.

 
 

What’s up guys? You hangin’ out? I’ll hang out.

 
 

Yeah Yosef, we’re just cold chillin’.

 
 

I guess that explains the shrinkage, Greg.

Isn’t it funny that Marie looks better in her picture here than over at Sadly, Yes? She must not have a good body image. Poor thing, we’ll help her, won’t we guys?

 
 

oh yeah…

 
 

almost forgot

 
 

Although Marie’s skill was considerable, one might even say a gift from God, she couldn’t get a rise out of the Viagraless eight; leaving GregH ready, willing and oh so able.

 
 

Marie, the little fluffer, and I sneaked out back behind the rectory at the VBS camp. We heard the singing class inside as the instructor intoned, “Breathe IN, breathe OUT, IN, OUT…” Before we quite knew what was happening, Marie and I were following the cadence, IN, OUT, IN, OUT.

Oh Marie, we’re almost there. Keep doing that, a few more comments will push us over. Ooooooh, almost there…

 
 

200 BITCHEZ!!!!!

 
 

Um Yosef, are you allowed to do that? I thought that only Brad had authorization.

 
 

crap, GregH and Ukko. My cpu is runnign slow so y’all beat me. 203 now. And yes, I tried to cheat, but that’s what we do here. I’ll get in on the story after a cigarette.

 
 

I think we’re going to have to rewrite Ukko’s last sentence as it has no connection to my previous sentence. Also it’s multiple sentences. For godsakes man, if you’re going to cheat at least have the grace to use a run-on sentence!

 
 

Go for it. I didn’t see your post and got caught up in the moment.

 
 

Marie, the little fluffer, and GreggH sneaked out back behind the rectory at the VBS camp.

 
 

What they didn’t notice was Father Mitchell, peering out of the rectory window in rapt attention.

 
 

GregH’s gaze alone sent Marie into wave after wave of ecstasy.

 
 

I just consulted my style guide and I’d like to rewrite that last sentence: “GregH’s manly glaze alone sent wave after wave of ecstasy shuddering through Marie’s lithe body.”

 
 

Meanwhile, the rest of the gang are playing Yahtzee and thinking lascivious thoughts about Kaye Grogan in a leopard print teddy.

 
 

Ah, GregH, Hg means Mercury. According to this page:
“As a god, [Mercury] was the swiftest–nobody could get there faster.”

Poor Marie.

 
 

Marie couldn’t be stopped, despite the alluring call of butter cookies and orange drink at the Morning VBS snack time.

 
 

Through the windows, a rousing chorus of “Just a closer walk with Thee” could be heard. Yes, rousing.

 
 

Followed immediately by an impassioned “Nearer, Still Nearer.”

 
 

Shortly thereafter, GregH started singing his own version of “Onward, Christian Swimmers”.

 
 

After what seemed like hours, their coupling complete for the time being, GregH rose up with a roar and a pair of peepo thongs clenched in his teeth.

 
 

With a radiant smile, Marie looked up at GreggH and said, “You’ll make a great daddy for our children!”

 
 

Never much one for pillow talk GregH said: “Marie, there’s something I need to tell you. Let’s take a walk down to the camp bog. You know the filthy lascivious one without any spirit but with plenty of contempt for God and the USA.”

 
 

(Interlude: how would you have a _pair_ of thongs? Isn’t the undergarment women wear singular? Who else is in on this action? Grogan or Marsala?)

 
 

(Did I forget to mention that Natalie Portman was there too? Silly me.)

 
 

(Also, Marie has been known to wear multiple pairs to protect her chastity.)

 
 

Meanwhile, back at the cabin the boys were getting ready to turn in for the evening when all of a sudden they realized that there was only one bed in the entire babin.

 
 

er…”cabin”

 
 

(Sounds like someone’s excited by the thought 🙂 )

 
 

On their way to the bog, Marie’s ample bosom heaving beneath her blue chenille turtleneck, they pass the boy’s cabin from which strange guttural noises, much like those of rutting animals, can be heard. “I’m scared,” Marie whispers. “So am I…So am I” GregH says shaking his head with a grim knowing smile on his manly face.

 
 

They then heard a voice rise above the strange noises, shouting, “As the hottest young conservative writer on the internets, I shall be the only one to use the bed!”

Marie’s heart skipped a beat at the sound of virility.

 
 

Then they heard another one of the boys cry: “Oh Yosef, you’re so sexy when you pretend to be manly.” Peeking in the window Marie could see the boys collapse onto the bed in a giant tickle fight.

 
 

Glancing at GregH, Marie realized that she had more manly virility than should could possibly handle right at her side.

 
 

Amidst the din of lusty baying, GregH suddenly noticed his little soldier snapping to attention. Bursting in upon the action, he spotted VBen, pinned him to the bed, and began the beautiful process of removing that wretched V.

 
 

Woops, DQ’d myself again w/ multiple sentences.

 
 

I do that when caught up in the moment.

 
 

Amidst the din of lusty baying, GregH suddenly noticed his little soldier snapping to attention; unable to resist, he burst in upon the action, spotted VBen, and began the beautiful process of removing that wretched V.

(There we go. Not multiple sentences.)

 
 

Marie, usually never one to change herself based on the opinions of others, started to wonder if perhaps, just this once, she should follow the poll results and take Yosef away with her and Natalie Portman while GregH was distracted by VBen.

(Lot’s of clauses, Ukko. You can write all you want in one sentence.)

 
 

As Marie watched this vigorous male bonding, she began to shiver with excitement, leaning into Natalie for support.

 
 

Ben’s lifeless form on the floor began to change suddenly transmorgified into a beautiful completely nude young woman.

 
 

Greg glanced down at what had been Ben but was now quite clearly Uma Thurmann.

 
 

“Oh kind sir, how did you know I was trapped in that hideous form by one of the wicked bog witches?” Uma asked lustily.

 
 

“A real man knows these things.” GregH replied.

 
 

“Your manly minstrations released me from the spell. I am yours forever.” Uma said with a mishevious look in her eyes.

 
 

So then GregH, Natalie, Marie and Uma proceeded hand in hand to the bog, leaving the boys to their strange little pajama party.

 
 

As this hedonistic festival reached its fever pitch, Father Mitchell burst in, ripped off his mask, and cried, “I will cure you of your gayness in 7 easy steps!”

http://mariejon.freepolls.com/cgi-bin/polls/004/poll_center.htm

 
 

GregH, not understanding, told Father Spongedob Mitchell go fuck himself, but Father replied that he’d rather fuck GregH.

 
 

Astonished, GregH looked down to see a heaving bosom attached to his slim chest, with shapely legs below.

 
 

“Stand back girls!” Greg H. roared as he felled Father Mitchell with one mighty blow leaving his lifeless homophobic body crumpled on the floor.

 
 

With Father Mitchell dead, GregH’s body returned to its normal extremely manly form.

 
 

“Let that be a lesson to Homophobes everywhere!” GregH yelled.

 
 

But instead of standing back, Greg’s “girls” lurched forward, causing him fall onto the portly Father Mitchell in an “extremely manly way.”

 
 

The girls shivered with pleasure and anticipation at the manliness of their man GregH.

 
 

GregH sprung back up and he and the girls hightailed it to the bog before anything else could delay them.

 
 

Glancing back, GregH noticed that Father Mitchell had been transmorgified into Juli Delpy.

 
 

Juli joined the group at the bog.

 
 

“What am I to do with you four young women?” GregH said knowingly.

 
 

The young women giggled nervously but with great anticipation.

 
 

As the girls writhed about GregH, they began to strap him up for some Vandersexxx .

 
 

The end.

 
 

Postscript:

One day, three years later, GregH finally realized that both the former VBen and Father Mitchell, having transformed into beautiful women, reached that stage through the same process as Ann Coulter.

 
 

Well, I think that was a good time had by all. We passed 250 about 7 posts ago.

 
 

Don’t care how they got there as long as they’re there.

 
 

GregH then realized that these transexuals, although capable of making him very happy, would become the same wingnutty former men as Ann, quickly causing his manliness to become like that of Bob Dole, leaving Yosef alone to conquer Salma Hayek, as they lived happily ever after in the heathen bogs.

 
 

Just got to 260! Wow! I wonder if Jeff, Gorge and the others will publish this on the front page?

 
 

(Seems worthy of front page status to me.)

 
 

I almost forgot to tell you guys. Since I posted the 200th post, I got the special treat. And it was good. And I’m not sharing.

 
 

That settles it, Ukko. You have just become my enemy.

 
 

Yosef, don’t be a hater, yo! There’s always 300.

 
 

Hey, good point! Okay, Ukko. You have one more chance to not become my enemy for life.

 
 

Guys? Guys?

(chirp… chirp…)

Where did everyone go? It’s quiet in here. Too quiet.

 
 

Yosef, peace dude. After a treat like that, I’m feeling a little stoned, but happy. Gotta spread the lurv, squelch the hate.

Peace out.

 
 

Hey Yosef, what do you think the prize/treat was?

 
 

Based on Ukko’s reaction I’m thinking that it was a plate full of corn dogs or something like that.

 
 

Probably the ones that have the cheese already inside them.

And ukko, I got to thinking, Judson Cox is my arch-nemesis, so I guess I won’t ever make you my enemy.

 
 

Well, I’ve got the munchies (really, not kidding), so I’m off to go eat. It’d be cool if Marie stopped by here again after these 271 love notes.

Marie, you can plagiarize from my comments if you need to in order to comment here. Try this, “I love Ukko with an undying love just as he loves me. And I wanna celebrate physically.”

 
 

Yeah Ukko, abstinence always makes me hungry too. Not that I can remember that far back.

 
 

What you say if I said I was totally abstinent for over two decades? I grew up in an environment that in many ways would be comparable to the Mennonites, and have only fairly recently left. There’s a load of stuff I’m still trying to figure out, like pop culture references. I’ve gone to all of two movies in my entire lifetime. I’m not too worried, because I figure I’m out now and can live how I think I should, but sometimes I really think I missed out on stuff in my teen years.

 
 

(I’d say you bring something totally cool and unique to the game. Have fun but be careful!)

 
 

276 slutz!!!!

 
 

“And then, GregH woke up realizing it had all been a dream, and he was spooning with Ukko and Yosef in the bog, while looking outside he saw Pinko Punko and Marie Jon’ walking to church, and Pinko had a terrible look on his face realizing that he would never ever get to touch the unexposed neck of Ms. Jon’ unless he steadily went to church with her for a whole year. GregH realized that it would be much better to spoon with Ukko and Yosef for eternity than undergo such a hell, at least if Ukko showered occasionally and Yosef brushed his teeth.”

 
 

And then, Captain Trollypants woke up realizing that he had been dreaming about GregH having a dream. Ashamed, he woke up, turned to Ukko and Yosef and asked them to cuddle with him until he fell back asleep.

 
 

If this were truly, I, Capt. Trollypants’ dream, while I would be cuddling with Ukko and Yosef, it truly would be their disembowelled carcasses woven into a delightful quilt of Sadly, No! commenters, upon which Marie Jon’ and I would kick back with some nude fondue and Riunite on ice in front of a massive fireplace in our log cabin on Ted Nugent’s property. Since the dream you describe does not have those attributes, I would suggest that it is your wishful thinking of being in an Ukko and Yosef sandwich. The only sandwich of that type that the Capt. would be in would a Faith Hill/Shania Twain one.

 
 

Gee Cap’n T, do you think we can keep this feud up until we get to 300?

 
 

I’ve got a new love: Gabrielle Reilly. She rocks!

 
 

Geesh, she’s sort of scary. As part of your popular culture education you need to watch the movie Weird Science.

 
 

OK googling Gabby R now.

Sweet Kelly Lebrock, my God she was married to Seagal! That makes her even cooler! Ukko, get on it!

 
 

Where’s that commie Yosef?

I thought he’d at least come up with a sandwich he’d want to be in.

 
 

What sandwich would Ukko like to be in? Probably some sort of Kaye Gorgon one.

NAILED!

 
 

I would love for some troll to highjack this thread- say something totally douchey about liberal blogs.

 
 

You mean, “GregH is so liberal he wants to be in a Betty Friedan/Gloria Steinem sandwich, then it would be a feminazi 3-way???”

pwn3d!

 
 

You guys are big bunch of whiners!

 
 

Thanks, CT, you freak.

I was so sad when I woke up this morning and I saw that you guys had gone to town on this thread. I was laughing my ass off. I don’t abbreviate that, because there is nothing more FREEPER like that LOL! ROTFLMAO!

*shudder*

 
 

Especially Brad and Gavin. They’re being mean to me at the thread up top!

 
 

I am an eensy bit uncomfortable with the Marie Jon’ fan fiction because it is not nice, however sooper cutie pie MJ’ is, and boy is she that, some on the left would consider that sort of thing a type of assault. But it is all in good fun, I guess. That is why I never go past her unexposed neck, and go straight to the Ukko, GregH and Yosef spooning, because that’s just true.

 
 

Cap’n T’s momma’s so fat; when you put her in a Jacuzzi she makes her own gravy!

 
 

Holy crap, this thread is still going! Wah. I’m scared to scroll up and see what everyone’s refering to…

 
 

Gavin you need to scroll up about 100+ comments and read the whole damn sad mess. You should know better than to leave in here alone and unsupervised.

 
 

By the way, we’re saving the 300th comment for Yosef. Otherwise we have to take this thing to 400.

 
 

I saw GregH’s mom kicking a can down the street the other day, I asked her what she was doing, she said “moving.”

 
 

CT, if you have to get your “momma” jokes from “White Men Can’t Jump” you are seriously lamer than I could possibly believe.

Ukko ja Greg H ja Yosef , halaava kotona puu , s-u-u-d-e-l-m-a.

How do you like them apples, Ukko! Two can play the Finnish game!

 
 

Oh jeebus Pinko Punko you had to start the whole Finnish thing again didn’t you? Next thing you know Ukko and Gavin will be yammering on ad naseum about some sort of soup-related Finnish insult and we’ll have to take this thread to 400 comments.

 
 

It had to be done. Yosef is taking to night off, and I wanted to see if people could resist the thread sitting there at 299. We’ll see after this post. I hogtied CT, so he’s out of the equation for now.

 
 

Yay!

 
 

Wait! I know, let’s have a Sadly, No! tournament! The winner gets to go out with MJ and undergo her very own personal “ex-Lefty” program. I will seriously stick a shiv in anyone who stands in my way. It will be like “Ultimate Lefty Computer Geek Fighting”
I think we could get:
Gavin M.
Brad R.
Yosef
wha?
Ukko
Pinko Punko
Marq

Um…
Kinda play for the other team. And even in the unlikely case that Marie Jon’ turned out to be an exceptionally gifted transvestite, if it even looks like a girl, I’m really not interested. I have, on occasion, found really butch lesbians with crew-cuts & tattoos kinda… interesting. Especially the ones who are kinda muscular and flat chested. In poor bar lighting, I can be like, “Yum! He’s really hot… oh, wait. D’oh!

 
 

Thanks for saving the 300th for me, y’all. And thanks for cuddling with me all night, too!

 
 

Too late anyway, Marq. GregH already got her.

 
 

Pinko Punko, I hear where you’re coming from and wouldn’t want to be abusive or objectifying of women, but I think MJ has a good sense of humor, having seen what she put up on Sadly, Yes, I don’t think she has a leg to stand on. But if it appears that we’re going overboard, MJ is free to write fan fiction about how hot I am.

 
 

Good, here’s a chance for me to use Finnish other than swear words.

Pinko Punko, Marie and I would love to kiss in a tree, but according to you, I’m stuck in a glory-sandwich with Yosef and GregH. Now that’s perfectly fine for those who enjoy that, but please…

G E T M E O U T O F H E R E !

Whew! Kiitos! Hyva paiva, MJ!

 
 

this is the best thread evah!

 
 

Pinko Punko and Marie foevah!

 
 

Yeah! Baby! We could do the three-legged race, an tha potato-sack race and tox out on three bean salad at the church picnic and sing hymsies and she could flash the peepo thong (meaning she clicks real fast on her CafePRess shop website) and then I could brush her hair back from her unexposed neck. It would be a total dreamsicle.

*sigh*

 
 

Hey Ukko, how were you able to get your prize for the 200th post so quick? I just talked to the prize claim people about the 300th post and they told em to allow 6-8 weeks for mine.

 
 

Yosef, Marie lives next door to me. She’s mowing her grass right now. Since you live further away, it will have to be mailed, but just have patience because it will be worth it.

 
 

I don’t think that corn dogs travel well. You’d better pick them up in person.

 
 

Is it the Costco corn dog pack? Like 500 corn dogs, each a little clusterbomb of deliciousness and preservatives, or is that redundant?

 
 

Apparently they’re cheese-filled corn dogs. Don’t know if they’re available at COSTCO. I also thought the prize may be a super-grab-bag of Funyons. Mmmm, Funyons.

I was at a theme party several months ago where the theme was food on a stick. My friend Greg P was there as was a plate of corn dogs. Greg P claimed he had never been sated on corn dogs before. As this seemed a noble pursuit we encouraged him to give it ago. Apparently, a dozen corn dogs is not enough to sate a person of Greg P’s stature. So that dream remains, alas, unfulfilled.

 
 

…a go…

 
 

This thread is like our secret club house now. Nobody knows we’re here and we can do whatever we want!

 
 

Nobody knows we’re here and we can do whatever we want!

Famous last words!

Hey, anyone want to play with this firecracker I found?

 
 

Seriously. You can be full of corn dogs, but not sated. You will physically be in pain and stop eating, but not sated. Like Chinese Food. I would suggest that corn dogs have shit tons of MSG.

Sweet Greg P. I miss him. I wish he were here. I feel like I know him.

Uh, Ukko, that Firecracker thing is… like a weird woman Cartman honky.

 
 

Are you talking about those things that come on a stick? They aren’t really food, but you can still go through the motions with them. The ones I’ve had tend to be too dry.

I prefer a good pig-in-a-blanket.

 
 

No no no no Ukko. A freshly battered Corn Dog (called a Pronto Pup in US Scandinavia-Minnesota) that is cooked to order will not be dry. The corn-batter will be like fresh cornbread with a crisp outside, yet moist and perfectly cooked inside. I shit you not. The fact that it, yes, has a hot dog inside, is dicey, but SO GOOD. If you have a chance to ever got to Hot Dog On A Stick at a mall location, they will make them fresh. The ones in California on the piers like in Santa Cruz are too busy and they can be dry. Trust me, you have yet to experience the deliciousness. GregH will back me up, and if he doesn’t he’s dead to me, and I will hound him from this thread!!

 
 

PP, Word!

 
 

Ukko, Pinko Punko is indeed correct. While a corn dog seems so wrong a well-prepared on tastes so right.

 
 

I guess fresh is the key word. Mine were frozen, reheated, and who know what else.

 
 

However, cheese on the inside of the Wienie is NEVER right.

 
 

I tried to google a picture of Greg P but suffice it to say that he’s a big man, a mountain of a man. Not too fat just large. The entry at this blog (which I just found while looking for a photo) is classic Greg P. (Look for the July 25, 2005 entry).

http://www.chezmeowmeow.com/2005_07_01_archive.php?show_id=112232838634826385#bk_112232838634826385

 
 

I actually sated myself on corndogs with one of those 500 unit Costco packs. I ate them every night for at least 2 months. The last one I had was about 3 years ago, and I’m not sure if I want another one yet.

And no matter how it gets there or where it is, cheese is always good with a hot dog.

 
 

Them’s fighting words!

 
 

Uh, cheeze on a dog is only good for cheezedogs!!!!!!!

Ha ha ha, EAT ME YOSEF!

 
 

I can’t resist excerpting this from the blog linked above. This is a man that all-you-can-eat places FEAR.

My first awareness of Tucson legend Greg Petix wasn’t as “the half-head guy who works at Bentley’s” (thought it could’ve been, we’re talking the same era), but more “guy with half his head and face shaved that I see on campus eating food out of the garbage.” I remember waiting to see a movie at the Gallagher with my pal Dean in those days, and Petix (and Wolfson! and Cilla!) were standing in line in front of us. “Ooh! I almost forgot!” Petix suddenly exclaimed. “Do you guys want any pie?!?” He reached into the pockets of his jean jacket, and pulled out two half eaten pieces of cherry pie that he’d scavenged from cafeteria trays. Obviously in the couple decades that I’ve known Greg since, I’ve seen worse (drinking cereal milk from a bowl of Fruit Loops that someone else ate) and funnier (eating off a plate left at a Denny’s table only to be interrupted by the person coming back to leave their tip), but that first memory is still the sharpest.

 
 

Holy crap. Greg P! He does what I think! I mean a half eaten plate of fries is like wasting so many blastocysts. It is a tragedy.

 
 

Cap’n T is here! Pinko Punko can’t be far behind.

 
 

I need to get me one of those alter-ego thingies.

 
 

……Field Marsahll Asshat?

 
 

PERFECT. It seems to me Capt. Trollypants only shows up to be kind of a dick or make obvious troll comments. I think Field Marshall Asshat would probably have a lot to say about Yosef and Ukko. I think FMA is really a total douche, he says what’s on his mind and doesn’t pull punches.

 
 

Test!

 
 

God, the comments on this thread are so douchey! More MARIE! NOW!

Less Finnish, please. I can’t think of a more liberal country. Ugh.

 
 

Yoinks, couldn’t agree more Captain T! Finland’s full of effete neutrality-loving rancid-fish-eating fools!

 
 

I may have to work on the vitriol a bit before I get it right.

 
 

I seem to be getting the hang of it. Check out my work in the Swift Boats Ahoy comments thread.

 
 

I’m heading over there now. These guys won’t know what hit them! Sadly, they suck!

 
 

I can’t think of a more liberal country.

Sweden.

Sweden’s full of effete neutrality-loving rancid-fish-eating fools!

There, I fixed that for you, and don’t get me started on the Swedes.

(Most likely have Swedish blood in me somewhere. Like my dick. When Marie is mentioned.)

 
 

hmmm…

 
 

…hmmm.

Does this name work?

 
 

Ukko, from the looks of the size of that wee thing there couldn’t be more than an eyedropper full of Swedish blood in there.

 
 

Dude! FMA, were you lookin’ at that leftwimp‘s dick?!

 
 

As far as I can tell you need three elements to make a proper alter-ego name: 1) military rank; 2) item of clothing (e.g., hat or pants); 3) it must sound vaguely gay.

But to each his own.

 
 

‘Sup ‘Dawg? Yeah, I found some pictures of him on your computer. What’s up with that, gayboy?

 
 

I see…

 
Major Shortssniffer
 

How ’bout this?

 
 

Nice. You’d better get up there in the Swift Boats Ahoy thread. There’s a beating going on.

 
 

FMA, I’ve never thought of eyedroppers in relation to dicks before, but now that you mention it, I’m a little worried about what you’ve been up to with your eyedropper.

 
 

Now it’s my turn to get a trolly name.

 
Private Jockstrap Johnson
 

Check me and my eyedropper out.

 
 

Private Johnson, more like a jaw dropper! Arr!

 
Pvt. Jockstrap Johnson
 

That’s nothing. You should see my cousin Chucky Johnson. He got that name after making the girls up-chuck one to many times. Then there were the twins, Hairy and Randy Johnson. The less said about them, the better.

 
 

Quick, everbody hide! They’re on to us!

 
 

Who’s on to us?

 
Major Shortssniffer
 

Y’all are onto each other, leftwimps!

 
 

Oh man, first of all, how dare you cast aspersions against that fucking SAINT Marie Jon’??? You complete buffoon batallion, yet you completely lack military rank.

Oh, my friend was at Wendy’s the other day, and he ordered a kids size fries. Shocked at how small it was, he said to me “could there be a smaller size than this?” And I said to him “yeah, Ukko’s dick size”

NAILED!!!!11!!!! EAT IT!

 
 

Nice Trollypants, just shot my favorite adult beverage (Coors Lite) through my nose and all over the keyboard. ROTFLMAO!!!!!LOL!!!!

*Hi5*

 
 

What sort of “man” admits that Coors Lite is his favorite “beer?” What were they out of Zima at the Circle-K??? Freaks!

 
 

Wow, takes a Zima drinker to know it, GregH- H is for handicapped.

I’m more of a Bush/Busch/bush man myself, if you know what I mean

*Hi5* Asshat!

 
Major Shortssniffer
 

LOL!!!!1!!!11!!!

 
Pvt. Jockstrap Johnson
 

It makes sense now. Capt. Trollypants thought Ukko was from Europe when he asked long his dick is and he said, “Seven.” Trolly didn’t realize that Ukko is actually a Finnish-AMERICAN where dicks are still measured in inches, not cm.

This should help to make it a little less confusing. (17.78 cm for our friends in Europe).

The real question, however, is why Capt. Trolly is so interested in my dick. I’m sensing some troubling vibes here.

 
 

Coors light?! That stuff’s nothing but water you dumbass

 
 

Pvt Johnson, I don’t quite think that you’ve grasped the concept here. You’re troll alter-ego is meant to attack yourself and other non-trolls.

 
 

Ukko, are you trying to besmirch Pvt. JJ’s reputation by posting under his name?

If so, your Johnson is smaller than I thought.

 
 

Of course a little troll on troll action might be hott too.

 
Pvt. Jockstrap Johnson
 

That nasty Ukko! He was trying to impersonate me! And he got his measurements wrong to boot! Here’s what he meant. 7 cm = 2.75 in.

Brad R, you’ve got to keep a closer watch on the IP addreses and not let people impersonate others!

 
Major Shortssniffer
 

I didn’t think that was you, Pvt. Johnson.

Hey, I wonder if those losers are setting up a cornhole prize for 400?

 
 

Where are the admins of this place anyway? God, they never even replenish the complimentary nuts and snacks.

 
 

And what kind of nuts would those be, CT, that you are putting in your mouth?

 
Major Shortssniffer
 

Oh! All that Pink guy can think of is putting nuts in his mouth!!

 
 

Project much shortsniffer?

 
 

Who should we save the 400th comment for? Gavin? Brad? PinkoPunko?

 
 

Where are we now? That is why you need to access it from the archive page, I have no idea where we are.

Save it for Brad R. he hasn’t been on here in awhile and he is doing a tonne of work this week.

Speaking of work, I will soon either swear off this board for the rest of today or be fired so I can play all day. I’m thinking the former would be the financially better move.

 
 

This is comment 377.

Pinko Punko, Michelle Malkin will probably write your boss and get your ass fired anyway so why not stay and enjoy?!

I actually have to go install an irrigation system at my girlfriend’s house so I probably won’t be back until tonight or tomorrow morning.

 
PinkoPunko's Boss
 

Pinko! Get your sorry little ass in here and get to work!

 
 

Jeebus, that’s harsh. The man is always trying to keep us down.

 
 

LOSERS! Why you gotta hate me??

I gots to push back the frontiers of science and fight off the hordes of stupid, all with one hand tied behind my back, and if you guys had been reading Three Bulls! and its associate Song of the Day, you would know that we have a rodent army invading Chez Punko! I gots ta mad kills with my mad skillz!

 
 

Hey Pinko, your site was down just a couple of minutes ago.

Don’t know if I’ll be back tonight. I think one of the admins here should get #400.

No mdhatter, that’s not you.

 
 

Where is the Private, FM, Major, etc??– f*cking Pinko Punko just outted us on his page!

 
Pvt. Jockstrap Johnson
 

Marie, check me out. I am hot! Way hotter than that lard-ass Ukko, effeminate Yosef, or worst yet, Michael Moorish GregH.

Let’s just face it: some of us (like Marie and me) are just born better than the rest.

 
 

RE: y_run – I suspect that he is a triple agent – someone in the know that’s goofing on us by pretending to be offended in a nice way by the “trolls.” Of course I could be a quadruple agent………..

 
 

385 slut bagz!!!!

 
Rear Admiral Tubesock
 

I think you guys missed an obvious homosuggestive military rank…

 
 

Brilliant! It takes much practice and the people are testy so use your new-found identity wisely!!!!!!!

 
 

What’s next you fools? Seamen Stains and Roger the Cabin Boy? You guys are ill!

 
 

Shut up douchebag GRegH. show some creativity- kill yourself creatively!

 
 

OK, let’s do a race to 400, see who can get there first. 390…

 
 

391…

 
 

392…

 
 

OK, this is no fun since I’m the only one playing, but whatev.

Oh, and 393.

 
 

aaaaaaand 394….

 
 

Threeeeee ninety-fiiiiiiiiiive…

 
 

396

 
 

397

 
 

EAT IT!!!!!!!!! 396!!!! Sista Souljahs!

 
 

398

 
 

400 ASSMUNCH!!!!

 
 

YES, YES, YES, I TOTALLY WIN!!! 401!!! WHAAAAAAAAT?

 
 

Troll control meeting for Ukko, GregH, Yosef and the person hunting down Admiral Tubesock. In July 4th Three bulls post comment thread.

39-sizz-even, cobags!!!!!!!

 
 

Very mature guys.

My best guess is that Admiral Tubesock is right above you.

This weekend is bad for me. I leave on a trip with the g/f in about 15 minutes and she may not let me play on the internets much. I’ll do my best though.

 
 

Ah Marie, it is you and I alone at last.

 
 

Hey guys. I was out all weekend. I’ll stop by over at 3 bulls and see what i missed. It looks like a lot.

 
 

Damnit Yosef!! Didn’t anyone ever teach you to knock first?

 
 

Sorry, Greg. If it makes you feel any better, I didn’t see her neck.

 
 

‘sallright. So you really didn’t see her neck, right?! Next time I’ll tie something around the doorknob so you’ll know.

 
 

Yeah and air out the room when you are done. One of you is pretty musky. Sheesh. I smell sex and candy. No, sex and melon? No, sex and beef jerky? No. OH GROSSS, sex and corndogs!! How depraved can you get????

309 ZIBATCHES!

 
 

Hey, PP, what’s the count up to on the super double secret thread? I only go via bookmark, so I can’t tell.

221, bizznatchezzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz!!!!!!!!!!!

 
 

I knew you two would be here.

 
 

Hah, we didn’t get enough trolls on the Whizzard thread to break this record. We laugh at his green weakness.

So, wazzup? Anyone still enjoying the party here?

 
 

I love sweet fun. SOmebody just spanked us on the double secret thread. They were sad that we were driving people away from Sadly, No! *sigh*

I sent the trolls to MExico- details in the newest “BRad Insomina” thread

 
 

Capt. T just called me from outside TJ- he said “well, some gang is about to go to town on Asshat and the Major ran into the desert high on mescaline and Jock had somehow run off with the gang leaders girlfriend, and I guess we’re goign to pay the price for Jock’s manliness, and it’s been a good run, and even though some chicks got mad, even Mrs. Punko, we can be proud of being in the largest non-atrios threads in Sadly memory and that we entertained and pwn3d and SUCKED IT!1!!!!!!!!!!11 until the very end.”

 
 

Wait a second here…so Jock is scoring with the ladies, the Major is getting high and Asshat is getting beat up? That doesn’t seem fair at all! I think that a rewrite may be in order!

 
 

I think continuing updates are in order- anytime someone is on right at the beginning of the thread, I think the memory of our rapscallion counterparts should be celebrated, you know updating what’s going on.

 
 

417!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hmmm, In the end does everyone get gunned down by the Bolivian army?

 
 

Being here again is like walking down memory lane. I guess that it’s mine all mine now! Bwahhahahahah!!!!!!!!!

 
 

Ukko, you in here????!??!?!?!?!? We miss you!!

 
 

420 bitchez!!!!!!!!

 
 

421 GLADIOLAZ!!!!!!!!!!!

 
 

I come back here every once in a while to see if some joker has been posting in the long thread. Figures that it would be you! Thbbbbt!

 
 

423 DONKEY DONGZ!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 
 

Tsk, tsk, tsk.

 
 

Has Gregor been whacking off back here, it has a weird smell.

 
 

Oh dude you nailed me but good!

 
 

Finders Keepers Loosers Weepers.

 
 

The nazi thread is trying to get longer we got to keep the thread burning.

 
 

Finally, I can be alone with my mustachio

 
 

Mind if I join you sailor?

 
 

So, Pinko, you’re the om;y one who knows where the “long thread” is, eh?Guess again, COBAG!!1!11!

 
 

“om;y” being “only,” of course.

 
 

OK, I’m posting this just to see if Pinko Punko, Yosef, or anybody else is still paying attention; thus, it it mostly said in jest. But I know it’s a vulnerable point, so here goes:
Ugh–what’s that on the bottom of my shoe? Eeew! A Take 5 bar! Disgusting! It’ll take weeks for the smell (and the pretzel-bits) to wear off!

 
 

AHA! Like a fly to flypaper! En garde, mein enema!

 
 

Hey! Leave things i do for pleasure out of this (syrup is a great fluid for some things, ya know?)! Actually–you know what would be the ultimate blogging coupe de grace? If anyone could get Marie Jon’ to post another comment to this thread without, you know, just e-mailing her the URL. Though I’m not really sure as to how to go about that….

 
 

I would pay big bucks* to see that. How could we swing that??

Anybody go a count on this page? Hold on….

*big bucks may not be used as american currency.

 
 

Hi guys. Really neat. Nana will get a kick out of it when I show her. http://alprazolam.gottaoh.com

 
 

Just checking to see if any relation are out here
http://swarovski.searchcar.org/daniel_swarovski/

 
 

February, bitchez! And, the shortest mont brings us cyberpharmacybots. Yeesh!

 
 

No way, is the long thread really being violated by spam? Or is it fake ironic spam?

 
 

Word! What the heck is going on? Marq’s in the long thread?!

 
 

I’ve been keeping this one marginally active for a few month now, with a minimum of one post per month. It freaked Gavin out. As you can see, Pinko’s been hanging out, too, as well as the pharmabots.

 
 

Um, “months.”

 
 

Well we’re close enough that it seems that 500 is inevitable.

It’s so relaxing here….zzzzzzz.

 
 

How does one get a comment count after a post has scrolled off the front page, anyway? I mean, sure, we could go by Pinko Punko’s count above, but how did he arrive at it? Did he count from the top? From the last listed tally upthread? Or did he just pull a Rush and yank it outta his arse?

 
 

Marq, Marq, Marq- you go to the arhcive page for the MONTH, not the post…then you get the count. 448 cobags.

 
 

[right-wing argument technique]
Aha! So–it’s just as I suspected! You do just pull the number outta your arse!

 
 

I can’t even respond to that, except do a comical Urkel double-take. they always win.

 
 

Hey, Gregor, did you see Scott C. used you as a joke in a recent comment thread over at World O’ Crap,,, I’d link, but it’s not right in front of me. Something about “bedhead.” Heh.

 
 

Err, “abortion-themed” and Reagan’s Children. s.z. found them first.

 
 

I will not rest until I destroy him!!

 
 

To be fair, I’m not sure I “get” the joke. Blah, blah, blah “…since Gregor Samsa.” Since Gregor Samsa what? There are way better insults to you, higher up this very thread. So, before you destroy Scott C, you’ve got to take out Pinko, Yosef, wha?, and Ukko (if you can find him and wha?). And, maybe others (I know we of the kweer kontigent weren’t competing for Marie’s “affecttions”–or was it her neck?).

 
 

Too late he has already been destroyed, nailed so to speak, as if Digby himself had done it.

 
 

Hey–has someone been doing site maintenance here or something? Suddenly, Marie Jon”s pic reappears at the top of this thread once again. For the longest time, I was just getting the “dead image” icon. WTF?!

 
 

Yeah that is weird. It’s almost as if somebody cares!

 
 

That was funny, boys.

 
 

After a prolonged undercover mission, Ukko returns. The question remains: whose covers was he under? And does he have bedhead?

 
 

Holy crap!!!1!! Is that really you?! We missed you!

 
 

Okay, hold on a sec — who’s here from India at this very moment?

 
 

Wha? How’d you find us again Gavin?

 
 

What’s up, Ukko? How did the secret mission go?

 
 

Ukko, I’m directing that the sex slaves give you special treatment. Our lives can truly begin again.

What’s Finnish for “how’s it hanging, cobag?”

UKKO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 
 

Gavmo, I think AIF was clicking over from 3B where Gregor Samsa, who needs to tell Ukko who he REALLY is, posted the clubhouse linky in comments.

 
 

Gregor Samsa = GregH

Come on Ukko, don’t tease us!!!

 
 

Ukko got busy with school, got himself a girlfriend, broke up with said girlfriend because she was too conservative (even though she was hotter than our dear Marie), and is generally doing great.

My undercover mission was to discover the attitudes of white Americans to racism. Question for you guys: in your experience, how common are racist jokes when groups of white Americans meet socially? Honest question–because I haven’t been around racist jokes much in my life, but some people have told me racist jokes are common in the average white American social group. The same people say it’s ok for white people to tell racist jokes because black people like Dave Chappelle also tell racist jokes.

 
 

Not very common. My experience with people I know in fraternities was that there were perhaps those types of things but more like “look how bad we are being”,and that is a bunch of guys, and I wouldn’t call it say social int he way that a bunch of rick whites might just make offhand racist jokes at a cocktail party.

the worst it truly gets around people I know is people discussing the possible truth behind the “asian women driver” stereotype.

also, there seems to be the whole joke immunity thing- jewish people can make jew jokes etc. catholics, etc.

oh, Ukko, the old girlfriend routine, how could you!

 
 

We figured you got busy with school or a girl. I’m extra glad to hear it was both!!! The flesh and blood ladies are always hotter than the pixelated type.

Regarding racist jokes – I would say that amongst my white peers they’re practically never told.
My Mexican/Asian/African-American friends do tell self deprecating jokes. But I wouldn’t say that gives me or anyone else not of their background license to tell them.

Right here on SadlyNo! there was a discussion several months ago about whether it was OK for a non-gay person to call something or someone “gay.” It was interesting to say the least.

Please keep in touch!!!

 
 

i interrupted a racist joke last week to remind the teller (an older irish gentleman) that the same joke had probably been told 150 years ago, in the same neighborhood where he stood, about Irish people.

he stfu.

 
 

also, as a straight guy, gay is not a word I feel comfortable applying. Queer, homo, and faggy do seem to be fine.

 
 

i interrupted a racist joke last week to remind the teller (an older irish gentleman) that the same joke had probably been told 150 years ago, in the same neighborhood where he stood, about Irish people.

And wherever those Italians moved to, they’re probably still telling it.

 
 

HAI Gaveen!
ME from INDIA!
WHY YOU AKS>!

i have walked into my fair share of racist jokes, only to see the conversation sputter and die.for example, i was once asked to play indian poker, and then the person realized what it was that they were saying and who it was they were saying it to and this one dude was like oh no, let’s play ‘native american poker’ and i almost wanted to punch that [expletive deleted]

and ukko, welcome back although i never knew who you were before and have no clue now and this isn’t even a site i feel worthy to comment on.
(/asskissing)

 
 

Actually, pretty common, but I grew up and know some of the reddest necks there are.

But also (and not to excuse anything) but a lot of the racist jokes I hear are in truth making fun of the racist jokes that everyone has heard. Such as, “Cedric Simmons who plays basketball for NC State looks a lot like Antawn Jamison.”

“Why, because they’re black?”

 
 

There is something to be said for being comfortable enough about race to make jokes about it. But it’s a fine line to walk and would definitely depend on the joke and the context.

I guess that I have heard jokes like Yosef’s where the punch line is so stereotypical as to be ironic. But here again the jokes were told by a Mexican-America about a MA stereotype.

 
 

AIF by finding this long lost thread – known as the “long thread” – you have achieved the third level. Congratulations!

Your goals now are to find the secret thread and the newer (not so)secret thread. I’m not sure if I could find them now.

 
 

I know where they are- they didn’t get moved over from blogger. stupid blogger kept breaking so we couldn’t get them.

actually, I’m not sure where the newer less secret clubhouse is. I’m gonna go leave a secret comment.

 
 

OK, I found the not-so-secret thread and its entrance, and I found the secret thread but cannot tell what post it goes with (thanks Haloscan!)

Also, check this BS out from GregH

This weekend is pretty bad for me. I leave for a trip with the g/f in about 15 minutes. I don’t think she’s going to let me play much on the internets! I’ll try to check back tonight (about 7 hours from now) while she’s visiting her friend. I think that you have to register at LGF to make comments but I’m totally game.

SAD> almost as sad as UKKO taking half a year of from giving it to the munchwagons!

 
 

The worst part about that comment is that I don’t think we ever did that trip because of car troubles. Truly lame. I wish that I was a war hero like you guys. Sigh. *secretly relieved*

I wonder if we could take this thread to 1000?! Would that break haloscan?

 
 

OK I found both “secret” threads. I would never have found the not-so-secret thread if I hadn’t bookmarked it. I thought that I deleted the bookmark a while back due to the sheer ridiculousness of having a bookmark named “SecretThread2.”

 
 

damnit!

it;s always something with you cliquers!

i’m going back to FW to play with myself!

 
 

aif, you should really read the whole thread.

 
 

hahahah

it was joooly meat day or thereabouts and king of all pimps.

 
 

man. i can’t believe i spent 45 minutes reading that.

that was hilarious.!@$1

PS: one secret thread down, one more to go. waiting for PP to drop some more hints…

 
 

Think of Malkin Watch’s nickname.

 
 

And then think royal.

 
 

Are you being sarcastic, aif? First of all it is funny even when somebody announces the comment number.

GLADIOLAZ!!! gets me every time.

 
 

Think of Malkin Watch’s nickname.

Poopie?

I lost track of the other secret threads so long ago. Although, I think the first one is referenced somewhere in this thread.

 
 

“i’m going back to FW to play with myself!” –aif

I would offer to play with you too, but I lack the coordination to play with objects so small.

 
 

Oh Jeebus! Not JOCKSTRAP JOHNSON!!!!!

 
 

Seriously. Ukko=Tapio=?

AND WHO WAS THE TUBER?

I will reserve 500 for Ukko to reveal his secret identity (but not his secret secret identity)

 
 

Shortssniffer you dumbass. You had post 495. Well I gots me 496!

 
 

Well, I can tell you I was married to Akka until I changed identity and married Mielikki.

 
 

Dan Someone = Tubesock

Chester =??!?!

 
 

I salute the Rear ADmiral!!!! With my FIST!!!

I DON’T KNWO WHAT THAT MEANS

 
 

I’m still not convinced that Chester was really on the side of the Good.

 
 

Um Yosef, you’re no. 500!

Re: Chester I agree.

 
 

500?! Me?! How many corndogs do I get with that?

 
 

Sweet, delish, cordogs! So corny. So doggy. Sigh.

 
 

also, as a straight guy, gay is not a word I feel comfortable applying. Queer, homo, and faggy do seem to be fine.

Hey! Fucking hey!! Cripes, I keep this goddamned thread barely breathing, on life support, for months, and then you loaves come in here and start making fag jokes! Keee-fucking-ripes!
Oh, hi, Ukko! Now we just have to track down “wha?”.

 
 

Marq- where were you when I made the “OH MY GOD!!!!!! THEY MADE MARQ GAY!!!!!!” joke?

Chester was supposedly a UC Riverside student that got a computer animation job at Universal or Dreamworks and maybe was super conserv. but had an islamic wife I think. His behavior was odd, I will agree. I communicated with him via his real name, and I think he was being truthful, but was also a true believer of some sort. Intense to say the least.

 
 

Whew, none of the Atrionis have clicked this far.

 
 

Hey guys–do you feel as if someone just turned on the lights?

 
 

My second cousin knows this guy who fixes cars and he said the ‘ at the end of her name is like a contraction and that her full name is “Marie Jontanamo Bay.”

Honest.

 
 

I am in love with the intruder.

 
 

Check out The Corndog Man, a great flick.

 
 

re: ches

I was just reading the sacred thread here from when chaz linked when the infiltration got busted. That’s when ches first showed up, and he seemed way too excited and was using some odd phrases to tell us how excited he was.

 
 

Is GuinessGuy here?

 
 

GG was over at 3B! today.

Ukko?!

 
 

Yeah?

Been busy teaching. In fact, I’m dreaming I’m teaching when I sleep. Too much teaching and grading will drive one crazy.

So I hear CHESTer was sporting a pearl necklace?

 
 

Are you teaching as a TA in college or did they somehow let you through the background check to teach children??!! Either way it’s pretty cool.

You should come over to 3Bulls! (Pinko’s site) and comment. You’d be a hit there. Don’t be shy!

 
 

dee dah, dee dah

 
 

Peener peener!

 
 

With a stinky weiner!

 
 

Cripes! The Gary Ruppert/annieangel thread is actually threatening the long-standing record held by this thread! Why aren’t you guys talking about pot, or something else guaranteed to generate 50 comments or so? For gawd’s sakes, start a flame war with your troll selves or something! Or, if you did a post at 3B about this poor, beleaguered thread, we’d, possibly, obtain 3-7 more commenters. Gary Ruppert/annieangel must not be victorious!!

 
 

Of course, I haven’t helped out much by posting like 20 comments on the Gary Ruppert/annieangel thread. I’ve pronanly posted several more on that one than this one. Oops.

 
 

Well, all you pansy-faced liberals–have any of you seen Annapolis? That movie’ll show you what a real man is. None of this touchy feely garbage. You make me sick: why for one fucking minute can’t you stop trashing the war and just show our troops a little respect? Sirs, at long last, have you left no decency?

That movie shows a real man-Huard-and the womb that bore him. His mother bore him at the cost of her own life. If you don’t want to take that risk, squeeze closed your window.

 
 

All your corndogs are mine.

We got a huge lead. Those hosers got nothing, plus they’ll eventually get the munchies and come here for corndogs.

 
 

I never show troops any respect. In fact, I have been known to make them salute me*!

*Think about it carefully, ladies–it’s a cheap, squalid fag joke. Now I bettah hope no one tells teh l4m3 where this thread is.
[looks upthread a bit]
Gaah! I’m probably D00M3D!
“pronanly”!!!11!1!

 
 

Besides, Pinko et all, do not be so proud of this technological terror you’ve created. The ability to destroy a planet is insignificant next to the power of the Farce*. And this thread is only ’bout 80 comments ahead at this juncture… um, before I posted the last 3. But, between this morning and now, the other one has gone from 419 to 446 comments, and while I admit its pace is slowing, it IS Easter Sunday, so annie’s probably squeezing orange juice like a dervish or some such, and it might pick up again tomorrow. Unless everybody, and especially the doobie boiz, buys a crapload of half-price chocolate, jelly beans, Peeps and the like, and go into a sugar coma for a few days, it might pick up again. It’s gonna be a couple o’ weeks before it scrolls off the main page, so remain vigilant!
*aka the Garyn’ annie showâ„¢.

 
 

Myself, I bought a bunch of half-price commas from Kaye Grogan.

 
 

Plus the two “pick up again”s. They weren’t as cheap as the commas. And Kaye didn’t have any, so I had to look around for some all afternoon.

 
 

Farq you Marq! I’m sensitive to gay jokes!!! You can’t tell any jokes around me, EVAR! PC (Ann Bartow)

 
 

So, Marq, did you hear the one about the British smoker who liked corndogs?

 
 

I work for Anie;
So I am really getting a kick out of most of these replies. Some of you guys are very good at making it sound like you know what you are talking about.
But trust me…. You don’t.
I think you just want to make yourself sound smart, when in reality you don’t know what you are talking about.
This is how bad info gets passed around.
If you dont know about the topic….Dont make yourself sound like you do.
Cos some liberals believe anything they hear.

 
 

Crap… Annie sounds like the flip side of someone we were discussing earlier. Could it be? Annieangel=Ann Bartow?

 
 

This is interesting: http://missannieangel.blogspot.com/2006/04/plagiarizing-asshole.html

Suddenly, Annie sounds a whole lot hotter than Marie. Annie doesn’t plagiarize, but she DOES use the NEW YORK LAW FIRM. Ooh, yeah!

 
 

Hate to tell ya but I KNOW I have seen that “How To Be a Christian Wife” thing before- but without the over the top OJ whore business. I think it is funny how annie is super mysterious, but somehow we’re not allowed to speculate when there is something obvious going on. Maybe you should just tell us how to act and what to say! We don’t think we’re smart, but we know when someone is being a cobag! Now buy the next round of corndogs, interloper!

 
 

Hey, Marq, thanks for dissing me when talking about this thread. Cobag.

So, who is annieangel. Didn’t Brad or Gav say something last week about a new “Stanton Carlisle-esque” plot? And not all of AA’s comments really seem to flow together, but she never complained about someone stealing her handle to post under her name. So I think that AA is more than one person.

Somehow, I believe Pete M. is involved.

 
 

BTW, thanks, whoever got the corndogs. They are delish.

 
 

I think you just want to make yourself sound smart, when in reality you don’t know what you are talking about.
This is how bad info gets passed around.

I think this is someone telling us not to spoil the joke.

Anyhoo, if they don’t want us to spoil it, they best let us in on it!

Also, while these corndogs ARE delish, I think that THYCWOTI is working against the interests of the long thread. Our lead is down to 40 somethign!

 
 

The thing to do is watcht he Sad,No sitemeter right about the time that Annie comments.

If I only had access to the Sad, No haloscan account! I could nail her! Er, you know what I mean.

 
 

She’s a genius. She is gunning for the long thread. She must be someone we know. I say Ukko is annie

 
 

Or wha?
Well, Jeeze, Yosef, it’s easy to forget you, living up north of the arctic circle in South Carolina the way you do, sheesh. If ya want to be noticed, you should move to more Southerly climes, like Manitoba.

 
 

The latest score:
The Long Threadâ„¢-541
The Gary.annie thread=515, and rising quickly.
looks like the challenger is gonna best the champion, eventually. Rats. We’ll have to re-christen this thread as “The Second-Longest Threadâ„¢.”
Yosef, BTW, continues to post in the annie thread. Traitor.

 
 

Also, notice the genius of aa, using reverse psychology about “killing” the other thread? We don’t have a chance. I screwed up not checking my referred logs when she checked out 3B. She was careful enough not to leave a comment. Curses! She is too good for us!

Desperate times call for desperate actions.

 
 

Aaabel, John 555-1234 Chndrmffnvlle

 
 

Aager, Sheila, MD 623-9142, 1716 Cobag Ln, Mnchwgn

 
 

TIme to post the phone book!

 
 

Chill out guys, I was just seeing if there were any corndogs for post# 500 on that thread. There weren’t.

Annie wants to know about the clubhouse. I told her I would have to get authorization to let her know where it was. What do you think?

 
 

TIme to post the phone book!

Shipping would cost too much! (bah-dum-bump!)

 
 

annie has found us, I believe!

 
 

549 biznatches!!!

Is AA actually VV?

 
 

Hey, thought I’d stop by and help the thread out a bit. I’d hate to see *her* win, just ‘cuz it would chap the hell out of my ass.

 
 

Oh, and BTW – when this post was originally done there was a comment way back at the beginning that speculated that Marie had stopped by, or that it might have been me.

I can tell you with certaintly it wasn’t me, because that was the day my family and I flew into Glasgow when we moved over here. I didn’t have access to teh interwebs for about a week, and even when I did get online it was at the local library in Dumfries.

So, it probably was Marie.

 
 

Hmm… awfully convenient for you to happen across the thread, cg. And the asterisks around “her” are kind of a give away, don’t you think?

 
 

So you aren’t Marie, but…

 
 

Yosef, stop being a cobag, and please don’t confuse me with the Jesus freak. One thing I don’t do is hijack threads. I just happend across this a couple of weeks ago and thought it was amusing that it had kept going for so long.

How does that go again in Saami? “?itisi nai poroja”

 
 

Alright, sorry, cg. I’m just trying to guess who AA is before she comes clean.

 
 

I tried to warn y’all about her when she first showed up. I was there on JG when she did her freak out thing, and I mean she totally freaked. I’m surprised her boyfriend hasn’t showed up yet (or, as some speculated on JG, her alter-ego).

I can’t get into a back and forth with her because she makes my blood boil, with all that ‘you’re going to burn in hell’ stuff. One of the reasons I left the U.S. was because of people like her.

 
 

It seems to me when J.C. Christian banned her he said her location was Ontario, Texas. I didn’t bother to check it out, but I remember there being some confusion that she might be Canadian (as you’ve seen from her comments, she has some rather stong feelings about Canada). That’s about all I know. I tried to go back and find it in the JG archive, but couldn’t. If I come across it I’ll post a link for you.

 
 

so she’s real?

BTW, now Major Modern General is trying to out post this thread.

 
 

cg, she’s just getting your goat. I KNOW she is one of us. Look at the way she throws cobag around.

She is also a super genius and it is KILLING me.

 
 

I’m planning on leaving the U.S. right behind you, cg…and for pretty much the same reasons.

This is not a good time to be an American if you’re gay or have a uterus.

And the saddest thing is that this descriptor covers the majority of Americans, too.

How’d you end up in Scotland, if you don’t mind my asking?

 
 

I was looking at the site meter and I did see some stuff that said Ontario, but it either said Canada, or I just assumed it was and glanced over that. I’ll check.

 
 

Also, Capt. Trollypants just blew up the other thread by reposting the entire thing, twice. No one will be able to figure out what is what.

That is how you troll.

 
 

PP, she wants a linky here. Do we dare? Maybe we should send her to the not so secret thread first like with Chesterooni.

 
 

That is how you troll.

Yeah but MMG keeps posting after you. Plus, I don’t know how the S,N! crew feels about that, since we aren’t hot like MJ.

 
 

She already found it- she just commented about a secret thread comment, where I called he a genius! She is everywhere!

MMG! Curses.

 
 

Oh crap, Capt. T. just posted an Atrios comment thread. That is like nuclear war.

 
 

Foiled again! That thread will die this one shall linger in infamy! Eat it COACHWHIPS!!

 
 

She foudn the not-so-secret thread? That means she found either this thread or the secret one!

 
 

No I think PP means she found the long thread not the secret thread!

 
 

If one were to eat it and no one was there to witness it would the degradation be constant? Pinkopunkians 43:12

 
 

571? I lost count.

COBAGZZZ!!!11!!

 
 

Jillian: I met my second husband in the states. He was born in London and lived for many years in Cornwall. When we decided it was time to bail, he posted for teaching jobs here in the UK, and we weren’t picky about where we would go. Anyway, he was offered a job in Carlisle, and we decided it would be much nicer to live in Scotland – and it was within commuting distance for his job.

Anyway, people seem to be much more laid back about things here. It’s not perfect, but I’m not sorry I left. I only wish I could get my daughter over here (she’s in college in Oregon).

 
 

WOW! CG and Jillian. Noticeable less boy stink in here now.

 
 

Man, the threads are practically neck-and-neck, with the annie thread in the 545-ish range, and this one at about 568. Damn that Modern Major General! A traitor I call him. I’m actually surprised that more people don’t know where this thread is, since Gavin (I think) linked to it a few weeks ago. Damn, damn, damn. I’d stay and help keep this thread ahead, but I, unfortunately, have an unpleasant medical appointment coming up within the next hour. Fight the good fight!

 
 

Gregor: I’ve been meaning to talk to you boys about that…

 
 

It smells like fresh roses and orange peel and puppies and ham! Sigh!

 
 

After the better part of a year of posting in this thread I finally bookmarked it. Imagine how many more comments I could have made without wasting all that time searching for it?

 
 

Good luck with your medical appt, Marq! I’ve got one tomorrow!

 
 

After the better part of a year of posting in this thread I finally bookmarked it. Imagine how many more comments I could have made without wasting all that time searching for it?

Especially if you c&p’d a lot? hee.

 
 

PP, which thread did you call her a genius on?

 
 

Genius? I think she’s a mimic. She’s trying to play nice so she doesn’t get banned again.

And I don’t think hijacking a thread by getting into a “am not” “am so” “did not” “did too” banter is exactly a hallmark of higher intelligence. Sorry, I have to vote her off the island.

 
 

Well, folks… sorry about the boy stink. At least this thread isn’t cootie infested.

This thread is long AND long-lasting, unlike that other squicky-quicky thread.

 
 

That was an accident! I meant to post it here!

 
 

Off to the auto parts store.

 
 

Well, folks, I’m done for the day (probably). Keep fighting the good fight.

oh yeah, 584!!1!!!

 
 

By the way, I don’t know who Annie is, but I can say she’s not me.

Also, vittu is nice and poroja is nice, as long as I’m eating them.

 
 

You’re off to the Autoparts store? What for?

How many of you change your own oil? I’ve heard lots of horror stories about inept 20-min Quicky Change places. At the same time, I’ve made mistakes myself changing oil.

Did you know you probably don’t need to change your oil every three thousand miles? Also, most people won’t get a whole lot of benefit from using synthetic oils.

 
 

If you do go to the Quickie Change place, be reeeally leeeeery when they try to convince you to buy a lot more stuff like engine flushes and additives.

Topic for discussion: if you live in a city and change your own oil, where do you do it? On your driveway? How do you avoid oil spills?

 
 

Hah! Women can’t change their own oil. They should just go to the Quickie Change place and do what the men there tell them to do. How many women can even tell a crankshaft from a crankbait?

 
 

I think I called her a genius HERE, didn’t I, which means she’s reading it!!1!!

 
 

PP: I doubt it. She would have commented by now…she can’t help herself.

 
 

She is flirting with us. She probably slipped up. She is being careful now.

 
 

She’s a genius. She is gunning for the long thread. She must be someone we know. I say Ukko is annie

Posted by: Pinko Punko | April 17, 2006 08:37 PM

“AnnieAngel said…

Pinko just called me a genius!

3:19 PM”

Correcting for the SAdly, No german time….I would say NAIL3D!

 
 

“I say Ukko is annie”

Actually, taint me. Since when have you heard of a loquacious Finn? 🙂

I’ll return to the corner to chew on my poroja.

 
 

PP: whatever you may think, she’s not one of us. I saw her little embroglio a few months back, first checked out her web site, the whole thing WAY before she first posted here.

There’s a definite psychosis going on there, but I’ll be damned if I can put my finger on it.

 
 

Heh, she doesn’t know how to find the number of comments in this thread.

She reallly does have problems, and to honest, I’m getting a little bored by her. She reminds me of certain of my cousins who could fun in small doses, but got stupid and boring quickly.

 
 

Who thinks this thread will make it to teh mark of the beast?

 
 

If it makes to the mark of the beast, maybe it’ll become the worst comment of the thread, surpassing comment #101.

 
 

Whose dah biggest stonah heah? Who wants 600 corndogs? You big cornfed lozers!!!

 
 

Ukko: Mark of the beast it is~Let’s go for it!

Maybe that will finally break teh interwebs!

 
 

cg, she is totally flirting. She just said she wasn’t flirting on the other thread, but that means she is watching this one, which means she is totally flirting! I love her.

Also, I think she is well constructed. She had us hooked and now she is reeling us in, slowly revealing herself to be deserving of a Golden Onion Wiener.

 
 

Is AA actually VV?

Posted by: Yosef | April 17, 2006 09:27 PM

Oh, God no!

No, a thousand times, no!

My legs are nicer. And I’m not an attention-whoring psychopath.

 
 

PP: yeah, she busted us, but she still can’t figure out how many comments on on this thread.

Be enamored if you want, but I’m thinking it’s more like enabling…

And I still say we vote her off the island. Who’s with me?

 
 

Since when have you heard of a loquacious Finn? 🙂

They exist, old man.

 
 

Echidne,

Ja, they do exist. They’re all either Karelian or young city-dwellers.

 
 

Everybody must be in on this!

Is this the first time in the world that there have been more girls than boys in the long thread?

EotS! Wowzers!

 
 

Who’s in Michigan, who’s in Ontario and who’s in San Diego? Where are you my flirtatious frienemy?

 
 

Echidne,

Ja, they do exist. They’re all either Karelian or young city-dwellers.

Karelians tend to hug you and other cootie-producing stuff. True.

 
 

Ha! Teh grrlz hijacked the stinky boy thread 😉

 
 

That’s the way to do it, cg. I’m looking into getting out of here the other way, which is going to take me a couple of years to finish my master’s degree and save up the dough every other country wants to see before they’ll let you in.

The thought of spending the rest of my life surrounded by Jesus-fellating, fetus-worshipping, homo-hating, Randroid-wannabes is slowly starting to give me a twitch. It’s like someone set of a John Bircher atomic bomb somewhere in the heartland, and the wacko atomic reaction has spread outward to engulf the whole damn country.

Hey…what’s that smell down here?

 
 

Honestly, the smell down there is something you get used to.

Where would you move? Australia is always just a few years behind the US. Sweden is cool, but sclerotic. Ditto for France and Germany. The weather in the UK isn’t so hot. Canada… ditto.

My idea is to stay in the US, but just move to a sane part of the US.

 
 

Like teh land of teh three Bulls!

Pork Snorkel!!!!!!!!

 
 

I’m planning on Canada at the moment. The weather may suck, but at least my fellow citizens will have less of a murderous urge to punish me if I decide to have nasty, sluttish sex with a man.

At this point in time, the future status of legal abortion in this country is pretty damn unpredictable, and that’s just sort of unacceptable to me, I’m afraid. You’d be surprised how hard it can be to actually enjoy sex when you’ve got the fear of the massive health and financial consequences from an unintended pregnancy that you can’t terminate hanging over your head.

So, I figure I can have sunny skies and a chastity belt, or shitty weather and a good fuck every now and then.

Which would you pick?

 
 

I just realized that sort of makes it sound like the only reason I’m trying to make arrangements to leave is because of the ever burgeoning cult of the fetus here in America.

To be fair, that’s not all of it. Although, being female, it’s not an insignificant part.

 
 

Jillian: I have something you might be interested in…Scotland is trying to attract skilled professionals from all over because of its declining population numbers, so they are actually trying to attract people to come here to live and work. They have a program called the Fresh Talent Scheme/Initiative through the Scottish Executive. Do a Google search for it to find out more information.

I know you live in Florida, so the weather might be a big shock, but I came here from Oregon and in the south of Scotland it’s really not all that different than what I’m used to weather-wise. Anyway, it might be worth looking into…

 
 

Ooh…………bless you, your ancestors, and your descendants, my dear! That’s a lovely idea, and I’ll definitely check it out.

I’m here for at least another three years, because I’ve got to get some experience in my new career field first (education) and finish my master’s degree so that I’m more employable elsewhere, but as soon as that’s done, I’m looking to go wherever they’ll take me, as long as it sucks less than here is shaping up to.

I figure that education experience will put me in a desirable immigrant category for just about anywhere I’d want to live.

And the weather would be different, but I’ve lived a lot of different places by now, and I’ve spent a bit of time in Washington state, so I should be good to go. We’ll just have to wait a bit longer, and then see what happens.

Now, while the boys are all playing somewhere else, whaddaya say we redecorate this place? This retro bachelor feel is sooooo five minutes ago…..

 
 

“hard it can be to actually enjoy”

You know, it’s true that being in a hostile environment really does weigh a person down. You may not even think much about it until leaving, but it’s a weight to know that pretty much everyone around you would hate your guts if they knew what you really think about many issues.

 
 

Waaah, can’t the guys help redecorate? … As long as Marq supervises? … OK, I’ll hold the picture for you to cast an appraising glance.

 
 

I think about it more than I probably should, Ukko.

But it’s sort of hard not to when you’re an atheist in the land of the Jesus freaks, when you’re a socialist in the land of the Invisible Hand-jobbers, and when you’re a reader adrift in an ocean of reality TV.

I’m not starry-eyed about the rest of the world; I don’t think I’ll be leaving America for some worker’s paradise elsewhere…but a single payer healthcare system and mandated paid time off from work isn’t too much to expect, is it? A political climate that has an actual left? Because I swear to God, if I hear one more person call John Kerry or Hillary Clinton “communist”, I won’t be accountable for my actions. I’ve made my peace with the fact that there are perhaps twenty two Americans in total who know there is a difference between a “liberal” and a “leftist”, and maybe perhaps sixteen who could tell you anything about what those differences are….but Hillary. Clinton. Is. Not. A. Communist.

I’m too young to be bitter, single, and celibate. And that just seems to be the path I’m heading down of late. Time for a change.

 
 

Ooh, sorry I can’t stay to help, but it’s WAY past my bedtime here in Greenwich Mean Time.

You kids have fun, and don’t make a mess!

 
 

SOmebody is serious-ing up the secret thread. Sigh. What can we do to cheer Jillian up?

 
 

622 GLADIOLAZ!!!!1!

We got them N41l3dZ

 
 

Whiskey, Doritos, really bad movies, and a game of Spin the Bottle wouldn’t hurt.

 
 

I think about it more than I probably should, Ukko.

Ditto

But it’s sort of hard not to when you’re an atheist in the land of the Jesus freaks,

Especially when I’m living in the town I grew up in, and the area is dominated by the religion you left. A place where few people understand why someone would be at all progressive, but extreme “piety” is expected.

I’m not starry-eyed about the rest of the world; I don’t think I’ll be leaving America for some worker’s paradise elsewhere…but a single payer healthcare system and mandated paid time off from work isn’t too much to expect, is it?

The health system in the US sure doesn’t seem ideal.

A political climate that has an actual left? Because I swear to God, if I hear one more person call John Kerry or Hillary Clinton “communist”, I won’t be accountable for my actions.

But didn’t you know that any failing of Bush’s can be shoved under the rug by mentioning Clinton’s blow job? (The Clinton with the penis, I mean)

I’m too young to be bitter,

Ditto

single,

Ditto

and celibate.

Ditto

HOLY SHIT! Over there… It’s a progressive female posting to a blog! And her name is Jillian…

hey Jillian, I feel we’ve got something in common here… how about getting a mocha down at the coffee shop?

Lights fade… curtains close… see ya later, folks.

 
 

Jillian, what religion did you leave? Where do you live? Not MoMoville, is it?

 
 

That’s why I move to NZ in September (after a couple of months in Paris). 3 Wks off minimum and SP Health Care and GWB might be a teensy bit easier to ignore!

 
 

Actually, that should have said, “Especially when I’m living in the town I grew up in, and the area is dominated by the religion _I_ left.”

I don’t know what religion, if any, Jillian left.

 
 

Way to be confusing, stealthy Ukko!

 
 

PP, I am one of God’s Chosen People. Poisoner of wells, eater of unbaptized babies, personally responsible for Worldwide Communism.

Yep. I’m a Jew.

But the sad part is that despite being raised in the temple, I’ve been an atheist for about as long as I can remember….I’m just not constitutionally cut out to be religious. It makes it even more difficult to relate to life in Jesusland, because I’ve never thought the way they think.

And I’m living in sunny Miami, which is where you should all come next year for spring break. I’ll show you the sights, and the first round’s on me.

 
 

“And I’m living in sunny Miami, which is where you should all come next year for spring break. I’ll show you the sights, and the first round’s on me.”

Serious? I live in the land of the ice and snow, and a little Florida sounds good about that time.

Although right now, we riding high. It’s getting into our nice season while you poor Floridians are starting to get too hot during the day.

 
 

Damn straight serious.

Y’all are invited. We’ll do sunset cruises off of Key West and piss off the Republican Cuban population with Che Guevara t-shirts.

Besides, I haven’t been to a decent party since before Clinton started sucking as a president.

 
 

But we gotta go the Raskal House at least once.

Sun and fun! Run with the Bulls! ’07!

Miami Eff Ell Ay!

 
 

So it’s a plan–Spring Break 07 in Miami!1!

 
 

Man, Jillian. If you hate it here so much why don’t you just… uh… Dammit! That argument won’t work on you!

Hee, a couple months before you leave, you should start telling everyone around you what you really think about this stuff, and then when they say “Well, why don’t you just leave?” you can say, “I’m outta here next week!”

Then sit back and enjoy the look on their faces!

How’s this thread doing now?

 
 

This thread’s still ahead, but it never hurts to keep the thing going….we must not be defeated by faux poseur trolls.

I’ve always wondered if any of the “love it or leave it” types would be willing to put their money where their mouths are…they could start a fund to help disaffected snot nosed liberal punks leave the country.

Here’s a hypothetical question I’m always curious to see people’s take on – how bad would the eliminationist rhetoric from the right have to get before you’d take it seriously enough to want to leave?

(Sooner or later, we’re going to have to stop with all this serious shit in the secret thread and get back to important stuff, like insulting the French and making fun of goofy Randroids.)

 
 

How bad would it have to get? Not too much worse, because I’ve already looked at immigration requirements for different countries and often imagine I’d feel more comfortable in a country like Finland, Sweden, or even Australia. It’d be nice not to feel like a green freak for not driving much and for not going to church every week. But there would be some things I wouldn’t like, however. I love the American individualism and dynamism, even if it can be taken too far.

Randroid Frenchies? Oooh, Sabine Herold can insult me! I’ll bask in the attention.

 
 

She’s hot but the Randy thing is like 5 million demerits on the hotness scale.

 
 

Essentially it goes to zero, but since the sex is merely a bartering for the satisfaction of wants and needs, wouldn’t it still be OK? I mean, its just two rational, emotionless automatons generating some pleasurable friction, right?

 
 

I see you’ve read the sex scenes in The Fountainhead, Pinko Punko.

Hooooo boy, reading about the first time Howard Roark and Dominique Francon got together left me more humid than a Carolina summer, baby!

(Or not. Whichever. Actually, every Ayn Rand sex scene I’ve ever read reads like a rape. That stuff came from a very diseased mind.)

 
 

I was just writing about what I thought they would be like. I haven’t suffered through those turds myself.

 
 

Well, if you want to get the experience of an Ayn Rand love scene without reading one, here’s how you do it…..

On a night when you’re home by yourself, get a copy of one of her thicker books, preferably in hardcover. Dim the lights, light a few candles, open a really good bottle of wine, put on your favorite music for making time with your lady friends with, slide into a some soft satin pajamas and curl up in a comfortable chair while picking up the Rand novel….

And then proceed to beat yourself furiously in the crotch with it. Over and over and over. Until the thought of even *thinking* about sex again makes you cry.

 
 

Jillian,

Thinking about just that _description_ of sex makes me cry. But I guess it takes all types. I was never really a Randroid, although I was curious about her ideas for a few days when I first heard about her. That stage was pretty short lived once I learned more about her. My flirtation with libertarianism was more in tune with the von Mises folks, which is admittedly pretty Randian itself.

 
 

What makes you think that another country will be happy with a new population of American ex-pats who more or less ran away from their homeland because they are whining loosers who can’t actually DO anything?

Why inflict your sorry asses on some other country? You’ll just find something to hate about it, too.

 
 

Well, I hope all you rats deserting this sinking Titanic of a country remember me after they’ve rounded me up and sent me off to the Halliburton “relocation” camps (which noone ever seems to leave from–strange, that). Face it, even if we turn this thing around, we’re royally fucked, if by nothing else, by the $9 trillion deficit we’ll have to pay off.

 
 

Yoiks, somebody put on the “Wicked Witch” theme, ‘cos she’s here!

 
 

BTW, the current counts are 646 here vs. 592 there. Huzzah!

 
 

That was annie. She still doesn’t know how to spell “loser,” which is ironic, really.

 
 

Ukko,

Libertarianism is a fascinating phenomenon, because so many people who have absolutely *nothing* in common all use the “libertarian” label.

My first exposure to Libertarian thought was watching the Lib Party in America try to hammer together a political platform on C-SPAN many years ago. The plank they were working on at the time had something to do with “any weapon the government is allowed to own, each individual citizen will also be allowed to own”. Needless to say, that didn’t make much of an impression on me. (Well, it *did*, just not the one I think they were hoping for)

The difference with the von Mises school of thought and the Randroids is that there’s something so creepily cult-of-personality about Ayn Rand devotees.

As much as I admire libertarians for their devotion to individual liberties (except for the crazy libs who don’t seem to have that devotion, like the homophobe libs you run into online a good bit), they never really seem to have a cogent plan for keeping economic inequality from developing into economic exploitation, and their faith in “the market” to be able to fix any problem that appears, no matter how serious (health care, anyone?), would make the Pope himself proud.

To be fair, I’ve known some bright libertarians who recognize and grapple with this problem, and they almost always impress the hell out of me.

But Randroids are simply too much fun to mock for me to be able to resist…the temptation is just too great. I was originally working on a philosophy degree, and that used to provide me with the best snark opportunity ever, because followers of Ayn Rand are convinced she is the GREATEST PHILOSOPHER EVAR!!!!! Except there aren’t any American universities with decent philosophy programs that actually teach “Objectivism” as a philosophy like they’d teach “Existentialism”. “Rand” is not taught like “Aristotle”.

I’ve found they get really mad when you point that out to them. Not that I’d ever be mean enough to do that just to piss them off.

 
 

Marq – come with us! I’m already thinking about marrying at least one of my gay friends to get him on my visa out of the country, so you can be husband #2 if you like. The goal is to get us to a place where we can marry whomever we’d like, gay or straight.

And annie and her friends can keep this place, with its red-sash’d Juinor Anti-Sex League,lack of birth control, lack of health care, and lack of all but the barest restraints upon corporate busines practices – I hope they’re very happy. I am going to take my very valuable set of job skills, high level of education and intelligence, and general bootylicious love of a good time to a country where they’ll pay me what I’m worth and I don’t have to worry about the Sex Police knocking on my door any time I want to have a personal life.

You know, it’s a scary day when a socialist believes more strongly in privacy and individual freedom than a “good American” does.

 
 

Plus, they probably don’t have anything like this going on in Scotland, ‘cos that’s mad creepy. I am, for a number of horribly unfortunate reasons, stuck here in Christofascist land, so I’ll probably get to be on the Tee Vee when our nutjob overlords introduce the popular “Lets Stone A Eag!” show, hosted by Phred Felps. Oh, well. At least stoning isn’t as painful as being burnt at the stake.

 
 

Now my dream of having two husbands will NEVER come true!!!

 
 

Marq, you’re such a eag.

 
 

That link of yours Marq… I’m not feeling well right now. And for lots of reasons.

Jillian, I agree with you. To me, libertarianism is great theoretically but breaks down whenever it gets close practical application. I still like the idea of do whatever you want as long as it hurts no one else, but I also realize that we live in a society. Part of living in a society is caring for those unable to care for themselves, such as children, the elderly, the sick, and the destitute.

 
 

About Marq’s link again: the whole idea of no sex before marriage actually does work for a very small subset of the population, I think. This subset consists of extremely religious groups that maintain close supervision of their children while keeping open lines of communication. Not _everyone_ has sex before marriage.

 
 

Here’s how I think of it, Ukko….I’d be willing to bet that just about every odious belief that is held by Pat Robertson when it comes to religion is probably also held by any random Amish guy. I’ll bet the Amish don’t like the homos, or the feminazis, or the Muslamonazis any more than Robertson does. They hate nonmarital sex and contraception and abortion and all the same things he does. But nobody hates the Amish, and plenty of people hate Pat Robertson.

The difference is that the Amish don’t expect anybody else to be Amish. The only thing I’ve ever had an Amish person say to me is “would you like to buy some pickled garlic?” But I’ve had the religious fascists tell me I’m a pervert, that I’m going to burn in hell, and pass all sorts of laws telling me what I can and cannot do with my body.

I don’t have anything in general principle against people who are virigins when they get married, or against Christians. I just wish they’d respect my right to live my life in disagreement with them

 
 

annie just posted in the long thread. have we come full circle? I think I have gotten the vapors. maybe when Gavin admits he’s annieangel.

J’ACCUSE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 
 

Yeah, I understand where you’re coming from, Jillian. If people choose to remain virgins until marriage, that’s fine. It’s irresponsible, however, for parents and society not to teach kids how to be safe.

As far as the Amish and pre-marital sex, search for “bed courtship” or bundling sometime. Here’s one example (5th and 6th paragraphs):
http://www.amishabuse.com/chapter4pg1.htm

 
 

If only Bill Clinton had been Amish….

 
 

Suksi vittuun! You don’t know who Gavin is? You are dense.

 
 

Don’t put strange voodoo curses on me!!

I should know who Gavin is, or I’m dense? Is he famous or something? Has he been on the West Wing?

 
 

Heh, the legends of Saami magic never grow old.

Hint for Gavin’s identity: you’re roaming his hallowed halls.

 
 

So he’s some kind of Pope?

 
 

“eag”?!? Huh?
European Association for Geochemistry? Naah.
Extended Affix Grammar? Hmm. Can’t be.
Enterprise Automation Group? Not even warm, I fear.
European Aeronautical Group? No, no, no.
Environmental Advisory Group? Well, that’d be closer to something I’d be suited for, but I have no requisite degrees and such.
Education at a Glance? No, I…
Hey, wait! it’s a typo! Grr! Love you too, byach!

 
 

Ukko, regarding pre-marital sexual activity, I never said that I thought everyone did it. It’s right for some people, and not for others, including some who engage in it. But when you get 7-year-old girls reciting this to their fathers:

I pledge to remain sexually pure…until the day I give myself as a wedding gift to my husband. … I know that God requires this of me.. that he loves me. and that he will reward me for my faithfulness.

… it just creeps the hell out of me, in that the little girl probably isn’t really thinking about sex at that age. I think it’s inappropriate.

 
 

I’ll take that as a yes.

 
 

Yeah, don’t get me started on that “my daddy controls my box o’ fun” stuff. grosss.

 
 

Damn you, Pinko–you just took post #666! U’d be more jealous if that were the actual number of the beast.

 
 

It was the “I’ll take that as a yes.” one. You also got the much less coveted post #667.

 
 

Hmm, it also occurs to me that I got post #669. Mmmm, 69….

 
 

Yeah, I agree with you Marq. The pictures and descriptions creeped me out majorly as well. My comment came from reading comments on that thread over there where some people seemed to imply that the abstinence and “security through obscurity” method wouldn’t work for anyone. While it won’t work for the vast majority of people, I’m not convinced it can’t work for a special subset of the population in communities with some uncommon characteristics.

 
 

That website is going to really help the Amish stay chaste before marriage.

Oh, wait…..

(Don’t hate me; I couldn’t resist!)

 
 

“I’ll take that as a yes.”

Hey Pinko, who are you talking to? Are you hearing ominous voices? Don’t sell your soul, ok? ok? Pinkoooh!!!

 
 

WOOOHOOOO! 666 SUXX0rZ!!!!!!!1!!121@13

I was taking annie a’s response as a yes to my j’accuse of annie a being Gavmo.

What I want to know is why 8 months of skullduggery to let the cat out of the bag? Mum’s the word though. What happens in the long thread stays in the long thread. On the internet.

 
 

Hmm, you know, the pretender thread has slowed a lot, and this, official Long Threadâ„¢ has pulled way ahead. With a little nudging on our parts, it’ll be 100 posts ahead of the other one (it’s currently at 593). We’re less than 20 away from that.
What happened to all the grrlz? I think the only one left is Jillian–though, Jillian, you’re one terrific grrl, so it’s not an utter disaster. BTW, I’m not redecorating squat, ‘cos the place I live looks like a bomb hit it. Maybe two bombs. You’ll thank me later.

 
 

Darn… so you’re trying to tell me not all gay men are born with wizardlike skill when it comes to interior decorating? Zap-down goes another stereotype. The only one I have left is that Finns can swear better than anybody else.

 
 

But, would Gav have gotten his alter-ego banned from Jesus’ General and put up a fake wingnut blog? That’s a lot of effort to go to. I’ve never really seen Gav post on other blogs, whereas I have seen Brad at various places not called Sadly, No! or World O’ Crap. Wait, strike that–I believe I’ve seen Gav materialize at 3B. Unless that was Pinko funnin’ around….

 
 

Well, there’s a certain truth to that stereotype, and I probably could decorate competently, if I was given money to do it with, and more importantly, if I wasn’t astonishingly lazy. The fact that the first part of that doesn’t apply to the interwebs only reinforces the second point.

 
 

maybe when Gavin admits he’s annieangel.

J’ACCUSE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Oh man. One million, billion times no!

I don’t know how she got here either. It’s very suspicious. Hm, wait a second…

Nope, it’s really her — if she’s really a ‘her.’

 
 

Oh wow, Gavin starts the gender smack.

On that note, adios.

 
 

Marq: you’re right, I haven’t come across anything that creepy in Scotland, but there are still a lot of people who are tripped out on that extreme Protestant form of xtianity here. And sectarianism still is a big issue.

But, at the same time, Scotland was where the second UK same-sex partnership ceremony was celebrated (I think the first was actually in N. Ireland).

And there is a large and healthy pagan population here in the UK, which is very nice.

But you know what, I don’t recall Tony Blair saying anything about a pre-emptive nuke strike on Iran. I have no love for Blair, but I do think he was probably either duped or strong-armed into the whole Iraq debacle.

 
 

Yeah it is pretty clear someone as cool as “annie” could only be a dude.

 
 

Awww, thanks, Marq! Now I’m even more sorry that you won’t be my second husband.

Sorry about falling down on my posting duties around here. I turned in early last night – if I don’t get something approximating a full night’s sleep at least once in a while, I get puffy eyes.

cg, I think Tony Blair’s main problem in politics is that he has a speech impediment.

It’s hard for anyone to understand what your actual position on an issue is when you are always trying to talk around Bush’s dick in your mouth.

Once he gets some therapy to help him overcome that, he’ll be almost tolerable.

 
 

Oh, and if you have a uterus – or if anyone you like has a uterus – here’s another reason to think about getting the fuck out of Dodge before too much longer.

How the hell do you criminalize the free movement of adult Americans across state lines? What’s next? Prisoner-style ankle bracelets for women? Radio frequency trackers implanted in our skin? Serial number tattoos?

I know that this particular law can’t possibly pass (at least, not yet), but the fact remains that America has a tendency to elect people to government who are very confused about the difference between people and property. Sooner or later, this confusion is going to result in some bad, bad things happening.

 
 

Jillian: “The Handmaid’s Tale”, coming soon to a state near you…

And what’s next? Those who have had abortions will be tracked down and prosecuted to the full extent of the law? WTF?

 
 

How did *their* uterus end up in *my* pelvic cavity, anyway?

 
 

Damn! Not Gavin either! Maybe Seb?

 
 

Not only that, but soon they’re going to be telling you that you can’t have any birth control either.

Then what?

This is why I’m trying to get my daughter outta there too. She keeps saying “It’ll never happen here” (i.e. Oregon), but that state is full-up with extremist fundy wingers outside of Portland and Eugene. They’ve already thrown the vote on things like same-sex marriage.

 
 

Yeah, what about Seb, anyway? He’s waaaaaaay too mysterious.

 
 

Ok, I can’t pull this off much longer….I’m really celticgirl.

I decided to create an entire identity a few years ago just to screw with you all. I bided my time, waiting for just the right moment to let you know my true identity.

Now you know. I’m really just a great big looser.

Sorry.

Oh, I’m also Gavin and Seb.

 
 

Not only that, but soon they’re going to be telling you that you can’t have any birth control either.

Then what?

Why, then American women will be returned to function for which God originally intended them – helpmeet to their lord husbands and baby factory.

But remember, they’re better than the Taliban, because they don’t make their women cover their hair!

Oh, wait…

 
 

If that’s true annie, how do you explain the different IP addresses? Can you really be in Texas and Scotland at the same time?

Sadly, No.

 
 

Hey, how come nobody’s made the Brad-annie connection?

By Neddie Jingo, I think I’ve cracked it!

 
 

Sorry, it takes me a while to break character….obviously I’ve been using a proxy.

I’m also Brad.

 
 

Brad has nicer legs.

 
 

annie, there’s a name for that: Personality Disorder.

Fortunately, there’s help; but first you have to admit there’s a problem.

 
 

I’m not the one with the problem, I’m your creation, Brad, Gavin, Seb and celticgirl….

I think it’s obvious Jillian is the one with the personality disorder, as we are all just her puppets. But then again, she’s really Ukko, so yeah.

Someone has a really fucked up mind.

 
 

I have nicer legs, as well.

 
 

Someone has a fascination with my legs, Jillian.

 
 

I still believe there are only 10 people who blog on teh internets. I’ve figured out that Atrios and Misha are the same person, but it’s still a guessing game for the rest.

 
 

So, which one are you, Yosef?

 
 

Oh, ick! What is it with these Jeebus-freaks and pink?!? OK, nobody answer, “They’re girlz, dum-dum.” And that goes especially for annie. It just makes them creepier, as far as I’m concerned. I don’t know what it is with these people and their control issues?-it’s very odd. I myself have no desire to control other people, and what they do, except when they’re trying to legislate what I can and cannot do. I really don’t like crap like that.

 
 

My signature move is screwing-up tags beyond all recognition, Drat.

 
 

I’m the 10th one. The only person who’s only one person on teh internets.

 
 

What about THYCWOTI, chumpwagon?

Also, annie a’s rocking my world right now*.

*If not my body.

 
 

I hate you, Captain Trollypants. I truly hate you.

 
 

Self-edited sexist terrible comment filled with lust.

 
 

What’s wrong, Cap’n T? Someone told you to “Eat it COBAG?”

Well, I second the motion. Don’t come knockign if the Long Threadâ„¢ is rocking, OK, trollmunch?

I’m sorry aa, allow me to place my coat across the muddy puddle that is CT for you, so you don’t have to besplash those gams with filth.

 
 

I’m not sure I like you very much either, pinko.

 
 

But do you really know me? Have you taken time to get to know me? All we do is banter and tease all day, but there is no knowing. Just “David!” “Maddie!” “David!” “Maddie!” Have you ever thought about the fact that Miss Depesto has feelings too?

I’m not sure you’ve thought it about it that way.

It gives one pause, I think.

 
 

What did you guys do with Ukko and Marq? And celticgirl, for that matter?

 
 

Some of us students go to school, Jillian 😉

AA appears to be bipolar–brimming with energy and love one moment, followed by hate and ennui the next.

 
 

HA! You’re a bunch of TEENAGERS!

BOOGABOOGA!! Hehehe!

 
 

School is awesome! I just graduated, and can’t wait to start up again.

What are you studying?

 
 

Engineering.

 
 

I went out dancing with an engineer once….we were in a second floor winebar, and the band was rocking loud enough and the dancers were enthusiastic enough that there was a surprising amount of sway in the floor.

The next thing I know, he’s muttering soemthing under his breath about “structural integrity” and leaving.

Although to be fair to him, he was 6’7″ – the sway probably felt worse to him than it did to us normal sized people.

 
 

Yeah, that’s me (the engineering part, not the 6’7″ part). I’ve been known to use equations to describe the arc my basketball will make when playing Around the World. I’m not happy until I know how something works.

One difference, though, is that I’m interested in a broad swath of subjects, whereas most engineers tend to be more narrow in their interests. I haven’t met many other engineers who speak intelligently about how sexism pervades society or how hunter-gatherers lived long ago. I’m sure there out there, but I guess I need to keep looking.

 
 

Crap–I ran afoul of my own pet peeve. I’m sure *they’re* out there.

 
 

I haven’t met many other engineers who speak intelligently about how sexism pervades society or how hunter-gatherers lived long ago. I’m sure there out there, but I guess I need to keep looking.

Quality, intelligent conversation is a lost art, I fear. Not that I’m bitter about it or anything.

I’ve noticed the “narrowness” thing in engineers before…if you look at most of the “scientists” professing to be young-earth creationists, most of them turn out to be some sort of engineer. It’s odd – makes me wonder if there’s some sort of Christian homeschooling program in engineering or something.

Statisticians show up as creationists a lot, too, which just goes to show that smarts in one field don’t necessarily indicate anything about overall intelligence.

Speaking of which…have we given up mocking the French?

 
 

A few years ago, several US labs got in hot water for cruelty in animal testing. Apparently they weren’t doing enough to abate their Anglocentrism around the frogs.

 
 

And yes, engineers tend to make me embarrassed when the topic turns to creationism. Part of the problem is that engineers need to be very intelligent to succeed in their fields, but they think that their intelligence and success in one field makes them experts in every other field as well. If I hear an intelligent crank, I start suspecting its an engineer, especially an electrical engineer.

 
 

*it’s*

My apostrophes are killing me today.

 
 

A few years ago, several US labs got in hot water for cruelty in animal testing. Apparently they weren’t doing enough to abate their Anglocentrism around the frogs.

Aha! Ze requisite French joke – now all is right with the world.

*That* is what I come here for. That, and the Finnish cursing, of course.

 
 

I was off doing my Wednesday “thing,” which, no, isn’t any fun. Anyway, not gonna hang out too long, ‘cos I’m bushed (heh). I’ll probably root around in here more tomorrow, and then comes my Friday “thing.” *sigh* more about that later, perhaps.

 
 

Sorry guys, me and my kid both have some kind of hellish respiratory virus so I’ve been under the weather the past couple of days.

Also, I grow weary of the aa “thing” – I think I’ll call it “annie fatigue”. She’s like the freaking Energizer Bunny- STOP ALREADY!

OK, now my head hurts…

 
 

…and she’ll probably delight that I’m sick and tell me that it’s punishment for pissing on Christ…

*is is just me, or do fundies not realize that most people who turned away from Christianity were brought up in religious families? That we aren’t buying? That no amount of screaming REPENT SINNER! is going to make any difference at all? That most of us can quote the bible with the best of them? Or are they just that fucking clueless?

Oh wait, I see I’ve answered my own question…

 
 

(please excuse typos-too much cold medicine)

 
 

That stinks, celticgirl – were I already there, I would have to bring you soup.

Making the best soup on the planet is something that Jews are just born knowing how to do, so I can’t even really take any credit for the fact that I make a damn fine pot of soup…my chicken stock isn’t really noticeably different from ordinary, ironically enough, but I have a beef barley or a potato leek soup that would have you out of bed and dancing the tarantella in a day.

Feel better soon!

 
 

Incidentally, the soup thing is an apology from God for the rest of the food he foisted on us – have you ever been to a Passover seder? Nothing says “delish” like horseradish with a side of salt water and a boiled egg!

 
 

Thanks Jillian. Since my animals just arrived from the states (unfortunately they had to go into quarantine ‘cuz we moved so quickly), they have gathered ’round me and are sending me all their furry good energies.

The soup sounds lovely. Maybe it’s just the *idea* of the soup that holds the healing magic! I’ll let you know…

 
 

And we need to find Marq some fun “things”.

Not that I know how to find fun things – my things of late are basically work and arguing for some variant of an eliminative reductionist theory of mind.

 
 

Jillian honey, you definitely need to get out more. What is your degree in, anyway?

 
 

If I could just get over to Amsterdam, I’m sure I could find Marq lots of *fun* things…

 
 

History degree. I plan on spending the rest of my life smiting people who misuse history to push their political agendas by beating them about the head with hardbound editions of Mein Kampf, Kapital, and Avicenna. I dream of someday challenging both Bernard Lewis and Richard Pipes to duels of steel to defend the honor of Clio, whose good name and reputation they have callously besmirched.

Sorry….this is what comes of a childhood spent reading The Scarlet Pimpernel a bit too much and putting waaaay too much sugar in my coffee this morning. I’ll probably be this silly all day now.

 
 

PP-

“Moonlighting strangers/Straight from the heart!”

BTW, new info up in the secret thread.

 
 

Toodles, I’m off to the SECRET THREAD

 
 

Jillian: excellent plan, the smiting thing. In my *professional* life, I’m a note-taker for university students that can’t take their own notes, for whatever reason (I’m contracted out of the university Student Support offices), so I get exposed to a wide variety of courses (I also have a 4 year degree in Journalism). Anyhoo, I’m often amazed at the way certain courses are taught. I’m really enjoying the take the Scottish History professor is taking this term, focusing less on the mythos of some of the towering figures of Scottish history and more on their human foibles. MUCH more interesting. Anyway, I love my work because it’s like I get to take university courses by proxy, without those pesky exams/grades/fees/tuition, etc.

Oh, and PP, Yosef: You’re both cobags…have fun in your secret thread with the “No GIrlz aLL0Wd” sign nailed to the masthead.

 
 

I think that you gals are like two minutes away from talking about Gogurt or YoBaby. Even a trollz can’t handle that.

 
 

Huh,as it turns out, I’m about half a second from telling you to fuck off, trollyboy.

What are the odds?

 
 

Don’t even try pinning that girly-girl label on me….I fence, and I can kick any boy-butt around. My old fencing maître used to train Olympians, and us girls used to regularly clean the piste with the boys. You won’t be haw-haw-hawing when you’re dancing on the end of my foil!

And as far as Scottish history goes….three words:

ROBERT THE BRUCE!!!

(Which, I suppose, could be alternately read as “Screw Mel Gibson”, but that’s another story.)

 
 

My town just “commemorated” the 700th anniversary of the Bruce killing the Red Comyn in Dumfries Cathedral. You can’t swing a cat around here without hitting some major historical site – it truly boggles the mind. My husband is a Celtic historian, so we’re very interested in the Iron age, Celtic tribes, ancient monuments, etc. Just down the road from us is the fifth largest stone circle in Britain, built 4000 years ago.

Oh, and fencing rocks. I’m all about the female Celtic warrior thing – Boudica rules!

 
 

Oh, and Screw Mel Gibson indeed! The dude’s psychotic…

 
 

Gogurt indeed.

I know your codewords.

 
 

Awww, does Cap’n Rolypants need some lovin’?

 
 

Captain trollypants has a head cold, thank you and is entirely degraded by discussions of Yobaby and Gogurt.

 
 

Jillian, I’ll bet you love Victor Hanson. Only the white, Western folks have ever been any good at war. The Boers took down many more British than the Zulus could ever dream of: therefore, all non-Western cultures are destined to remain pathetic.

 
 

I like my men degraded.

It keeps them from getting uppity.

 
 

Ukko, they ALL drive me to drink. Victor Davis Hanson wouldn’t know a Zulu from a Xhosa. Samuel Huntington somehow created an “Islamo-Confucian civilization” that is inevitably going to clash with ours – which just oh so conveniently happens to mesh perfectly with every position paper to come out of the damn PNAC thinktank. Max Boot used to drive me batshit crazy with his “remake the American military to resemble the British Imperial Army” nonsense, until I realized that he actually wasted space in the LA Times worrying about whether or not the Chinese might develop an earthquake ray.

They’re all insane. And people all over listen in rapt delight at their lunatic ravings, and I’m left sitting here wondering to myself when the sane train left the tracks.

I just sort of go with it now…I try to keep the attacks of rage down to a minimum, except for when one of them craps all over any of my favorite areas of history. Thus, Max Boot, despite the flaming moronicness of his “American Imperial Army”, doesn’t piss me off as much as, say, Richard Pipes does, because I love early Soviet history.

The only thing that keeps me from lapsing into gibbering alcoholism is a steadfast faith that one day, the grownups will take control of the country again.

Criminey – celticgirl’s right: I do need to get out more.

 
 

But I still have lovin’ for the cap’n!

 
 

I don’t love the Capn. He just used strikethrough on the entirety of Three Bulls. The whole site is crossed out.

 
 

The cap’n just needs some sweet, sweet lovin’.

And the crossout is very hip, very now. I dig it.

Send him over here, so celticgirl and I can degrade him more!

 
 

Oh, have I mentioned how COMPLETELY FUCKING INSANE a person has to be to even for a second seriously consider an “earthquake ray”?

 
 

I love the earthquake ray!

I blame boys reading comic books. Seriously, a little too much of the stuff is like having a bad porn habit. Earthquake rays and patriarchy go hand in hand.

 
 

Yes, let’s degrade trollyboy some more…you know he lurves it!

 
 

Did you give your cold to the cap’n, Pinko Punko?

That wasn’t very nice.

 
 

“Earthquake rays and patriarchy go hand in hand”

Even the cute little pink earthquake rays? I thought they were anti-patriarchal because they supplant the holy phallus.

 
 

Only if they have the optional miniquake rabbit-ears on top.

 
 

D’oh! my secret’s out now.

At least I look good in a fez and a smoking jacket.

 
 

Come on kids, let’s not let this thing die! We could crack 1000 if we put our backs into it.

Who’s with me?

 
 

annie’s crowing and crowing about your little goof in the Gary Ruppert II thread and elsewhere–as though you were actually trying to seriously deceive people, and pull off some nefarious scheme. You know, as opposed to making a funny or two. She’s so filled with fucking GLEE. It’s really pathetic.

 
 

Er, that was to Jillian….

 
 

hey, cg, I’m all up for it–it’s only around 240 posts away at this point. Personally, I think we should aim to double the posts on the pretender longish thread, which currently isn’t expanding very quickly. It’s presently at 602, and double that is 1204, very doable. Of course, it will continue to gain a few comments, but in a couple of days, it should slide right off the front page, and then it’ll be fairly moribund. Then we can throw a victory party in here!

 
 

Marq, I’d wager anything it’s simply because she doesn’t really know who Ataturk is.

It’s just a pretty dopey joke that you have to have a bit of an education to get, which is the sort of humor that made me enjoy Sadly, No! so much in the first place. I know the regular reading audience got it, and I figure any non-regs who didn’t would just Wiki the name. I consider it my contribution to “viral education” for the day.

Annie’s basically uneducable, though, so I’m not surprised. I’ve taken to just ignoring her – there’s some serious narcissistic personality disorder going on there, and it’s just gotten tedious at this point.

Incidentally, my first exposure to the good Mustafa Kemal Ataturk came from my favorite college history professor, who was an unreformed old school CPUSA Marxist. He used to defend Ataturk in class. He defended Milosevic, too, although thankfully never in class.

It was sooooo fucking annoying – why does the Left always get saddled with the genocide apologists? I’m just as much a socialist as the next person (as long as the next person is a socialist, I suppose), but I’m pleased as punch that Milosevic is no longer with us. I just don’t understand this knee-jerk defense of anyone who claims to endorse a Left platform by such huge swaths of the Left.

 
 

Maybe I can hit Marq up for some advice in here…

One of my dearest friends in the world is gay. He’s younger, and he’s just recently come out, which was a fairly fear-ridden experience for him. (Thank goodness nobody around him freaked out about it!) He’s pretty much gotten over all the initial anxieties that come with identifying as gay in this cockamamie homophobic country, but the problem he’s having now is trying to meet people.

There’s an eighteen-and-older club in the town where he lives, but that’s got all the usual problems associated with trying to meet people in bars. He’s not looking to meet the love of his life, but he really doesn’t want to get caught up in the whole one night stand thing, either.

This is just one of those things I can’t really offer him a lot of advice on, being 1.) a girl, 2.) not gay, and 3.) completely incapable of meeting people my own self.

So, what’s a cute young gay boy to do?

 
 

Marq: I say let’s go for it. We just might break teh interwebs yet.

But to PP and Yosef and their “secret thread” I say feh.

And I have to apologize for being cranky a little earlier, but I’m just freaking tired of the trolls around here. I like S,N! for the witty repartee, not having tools regurtitate made up *facts* or teach me all about the history of religion, or simply add nothing of value to the discourse.

More snark, please.

 
 

Awww, cg, don’t apologize! Righteously bitchy women are hawt!!!

As far as the troll thing goes….don’t let it get you down. If you do, then the trolls win! Besides, our most recent iteration of trolldom is going to turn out to have the attention span of a spastic colon, anyway, so I wouldn’t sweat it – just give it a few days. Seems like most people have its number at this point, and have stopped feeding it.

I think I may have to adopt obscure historical personae for posting around here more often….that was actually kind of fun. Any suggestions? Personally, I think I might feel a bit of a Sun Yat Sen coming on…

 
 

“why does the Left always get saddled with the genocide apologists?”

Isn’t it usually the older leftists who defend the genocidaires? Maybe the atrocities are not as obvious early on, when the defenders started liking the monsters. As the true nature of the atrocities became apparent, the defenders were already too heavily invested and couldn’t backpedal their support. I don’t personally know anyone who has started to defend monsters after their true natures are manifested. I’m sure there some folks I support now who could end up being nasty, and if I can’t admit a mistake, I will at some point in the future be a defender of those nasties.

 
 

I think you’re onto something, Ukko…that’s pretty much the way it happened with Stalin and the American Left. Lots of people don’t know that Stalin had been a Bolshevik from the earliest days, and not too bad of a theoretician, as well. He did a lot to help fund the revolution by organizing a pretty impressive bunch of bank robberies. To which I must add the obligatory “yes, yes, bank robberies are terrible things”, but the fact is that revolutions don’t pay for themselves, and you can always contrast the Soviet method of paying for a revolution with the American way of paying for a revolution, which involves floating a bunch of worthless paper currency and treasury bills and then defaulting on all of it once the war’s over.

Anyway, there were lots of reasons to believe that Stalin would be an effective leader of a revolutionary government at first. Yes, Trotsky was saying bad things about him, but in the early days, it was still possible for a reasonable person to believe that most of that was being caused by traditional Georgian/Great Russian racism and rivalries.

As time went on and Stalin’s utter disregard for human rights became more and more evident, the Left fractured over whether or not to support him…too many people had too much invested in the Soviet system as the hope of the future to speak honestly. They let their need to be right blind them to reality.

It’s a great shame, a huge moral failing, and the failure of the Left to take a strong enough stand against what was happening in the Soviet Union did a lot to leave them the crippled mass they are today.

The only bright spot in this whole analysis is that more and more, this is what Bush’s presidency is starting to look like. With any luck, the American Right in fifty years will look a lot like the American Left of today.

Oh, and btw, my Milosevic-loving prof was indeed an old school Lefty. I was sorta disappointed to see that he hadn’t made D. Ho’s list of dangerous professors.

 
 

Bush’s presidency was a failure from day 1. It was always a sham. The entire right wing has been a sham since before Nixon. You could actually make a case that Nixon was astonishlngly better than GWB. I mean he started a “War on Cancer”- these peeps have gone way beyond a Stalinesque code for feigned socialism and totalitarianism, these guys are straight up imaginary world fascists. It seems to me Stalin created a facade, whereas the Right creates an entirely fake world, the difference being the level at which the two sides believe in the truth of their created worlds.

 
 

770 CHUPWADZ!!!!!!21

 
 

Cap’n Rolypants! We missed you!

Come over here and gimme some sugar, sweet thing!

 
 

Nixon WAS astonishingly better than GWB. He had a hell of an environmental record for a Republican. When the gold standard imposed by the Bretton Woods accords collapsed, he had the spinal integrity necessary to implement price and wage freezes – could you imagine what they’d do to a Republican president who tried that today?

What’s interesting to me is that people seem to be waking up to the fact that this president is running a sham administration. It’s going to get interesting over the next few months and years as the unwieldy confederacy of thecons, neocons. right libertarians, and paleocons comes apart at the seams and sets upon each other like a pack of feral dogs.

Not that I’m gloating or anything.

 
 

Pinko, you really misunderstand political management. An individual should not have too much freedom. A nation should absolute freedom. Our Leader realizes this. Our nation has the freedom to conqueror any nation that looks at us funny. Our people have the freedom live in this nation and pay for that freedom with its accompanying responsibility to allow the government to protect that freedom by monitoring those who would disrupt the liberties we hold dear. So it is that wiretapping will stand as Our Decider’s greatest monument to American freedom.

 
 

It’s also important to listen to your generals, too….as long as they haven’t been contaminated with too much freedom.

 
 

Jillian, you hope in vain for the dissolution of the Grand Old Party. Politics is concerned with herds rather than with individuals, and the passions which are important in politics are, therefore, those in which the various members of a given herd can feel alike. The broad instinctive mechanism upon which political edifices have to be built is one of cooperation within the herd and hostility towards other herds. The co-operation within the herd is never perfect. There are members who do not conform, who are, in the etymological sense, «egregious», that is to say, outside the flock. These members are those who have fallen below, or risen above, the ordinary level. They are: Charles Johnsons, Jack Abramoffs, Pat Robertsons, and Karl Roves. A wise herd will learn to tolerate the eccentricity of those who rise above the average, and to treat with a minimum of ferocity those who fall below it.

 
 

The problem the Repubs have at this point is that they’ve built a coalition with people who don’t really share a lot of these passions. The Bill Kristols of the world couldn’t care less about evil baby killer abortionists or wretched sodomites if you paid them money to – and money actually IS the only thing they care about. And yet this mythical Republican “base” doesn’t seem to care about much outside of homo nups and womb babies.

If the Republican party doesn’t deliver on those points, they’re going to lose their base. But if they blow up the whole rest of the world thinking that they can skate by on the gay abortionist thing, the rest of the country isn’t going to cut them enough slack to be able to push their no queers, no dirty women agenda through.

They’re caught in a trap of their own making, and I am not even ashamed of the fact that I gloat about it every chance I get.

So, Berty, have you managed to make your peace with quantum mechanics yet? Your troubles in that field made you say some fairly silly things about the composition of mental states, if you don’t mind my saying so. Don’t get me wrong – mad props for your work in analytic logic and all, and you have to give a shoutout to the first philosopher to also be a bit of a swinger – even back when swinging wasn’t cool. Nobody’s perfect, my man. Don’t take it to heart.

 
 

WHAT IN THE HELL IS GOING ON HERE?!?!!

 
 

As far as quantum mechanics and mental health issue goes, that was just an object lesson to teach you not to trust an expert speaking outside their field of expertise. Since the GOP has kept the theocons in their back pocket for a generation without delivering on the abortion issue, I don’t see why the current state of affairs must change now, although obviously I’d be delighted if it did.

The swinging–I’m still available, if you catch my drift 😉

 
 

I’m skeptical about the value of price controls. Has their ever been a time where they’ve been demonstrated to work without causing shortages?

 
 

Wha?, I guess that once Echidne found the link, she passed it on to all the other big name folks.

 
 

Ukko, the one time Nixon did was in 1971, I think – I’ll look it up later when I’m feeling less lazy – and a combination of a number of different factors (the war in Vietnam, the rebounding of the Chinese economy, the destabilization caused to international currency valuations by the gold standard)had the dollar closer to the point of collapse than most people were comfortable with. The controls didn’t last very long, and they really didn’t do much in the end, anyway – the economy was still heading for the crapper when they were released. Double digit inflation sucks, no matter what your economic philosophy is.

I’ve always thought it was a move of desperation more than conviction. But it’s still impressive that a Republican president could have done such a thing without being prompty drummed out of his party for doing so.

 
 

So, hey, Berty…or should I call you “Lord Russell”?

You know, if you bought me a drink and read me my favorite passages from “Why I Am Not A Christian”, maybe we could discuss this whole “swinging” thing a little further…if you catch my drift.

 
 

I’ve sent Marie ‘Jon an email, hoping to convince her to return and save her thread, before it’s too late. It’s not as fun w/o all the cool fonts and colors that were in the original, though. I have to learn to use those damn tags. Anywho:

Marie!

‘Tis I, your love Wha?! I regret ever leaving your side, but Other People in faraway lands needed me, and I was compelled to become that which I am…you would not have less, would you?

I have returned in this dark hour to once again take up the keyboard in defense of your honour!

As we planned, the Sadly, No! thread dedicated to you and your beauty – the one that proved once and for all that you are the hottest conservative on the internet – has lived on in perpetuity; a timeless shrine to your greatness to be shared from blogfather to blogson. It has currently garnered a glorious 772 POSTS, all in dedicated to your radiance – and a few other things, but mainly your radiance!

However, my rival – the Evil Yousef – still hates you for chosing me over him as your godhead-lover, and conspires with other dark forces (I suspect Marq, or even worse – GregH), to destroy the MJ-temple Thread by creating an evil, paralell Secret Thread!!!

The only way to defeat them is to beat their thread to 1000 posts. While I will stuff empty-post after empty-post into the MJ-Temple Thread, only YOU(My Love! My Love! (together) My..Endless..Loooovvvvveee…Bum, Bum…Bum, Bum, Bum BUM, Bu-hum, Bum….Bo, bum, bum, bum, BUM, bum) ccan call back the faithful!

Please help me defend your honor against the godless Yousef, Marq, and that most vile GregH! I can handle two at once, but three? I lack the weaponry – you, however, have the power to take on the many!
Your Love,
Wha?

 
 

Heh, Wha? failed to mention me. I’m going to be a-streaking on by as he fights with all his named protagonists.

 
 

Jillian, my sweet, when you hear people in church debasing themselves and saying that they are miserable sinners, and all the rest of it, it seems contemptible and not worthy of self-respecting human beings. We ought to stand up and look the world frankly in the face.

I like Julia Sweeney’s talk on the subject. She presents a balanced and humorous take on not believing. Why, I ask, are women underrepresented in the infidel community?

 
 

Yay! Teh Gary Ruppert II post has slipped off the front page. Now that sucka’s gonna die for sure!

 
 

Why, I ask, are women underrepresented in the infidel community?

Because traditional Judaeo-Christian religion makes virtues out of the traits that Western society considers “womanly”, whereas the secular world generally doesn’t consider those “womanly” traits very worthwile. All that stuff about compassion, love, forgiveness – for a long time people have thought that those are somehow the special purview of women. So if you buy into that idea, and you’re a woman, why wouldn’t you want to hang out where those are supposed to be a good thing?

Let’s face it – if I started a religion that taught the path to salvation could only be reached by being an eighty-years dead British philosopher of the analytic school, I’ll bet I could get even you to join up.

So, what did you make of Frege’s response to that correspondence you launched with him? Personally, I think he bit the bullet on it.

 
 

“eighty-years dead British philosopher”

My how the time flies! I thought my death was more recent than that.

As far as Frege, I must agree with you. He tried, but wasn’t able to chew what he bit off. This leads to the question: if the US unilaterally uses nuclear weapons on Iran, can we call our nation the world’s police officer who polices every nation that doesn’t police itself?

 
 

As long as none of the soldiers try to be the barber who only shaves people who don’t shave themselves, I think it will work!

 
 

Sorry, Ukko, my own foolish mistake.

You have been an amazing steward of the temple of Marie Jon’; surely she shall favor you upon her return.

A troll posting as “angryannie” or something like that has informed me that Jillian is now the queen of the temple. Is this true? Perhaps she is a high-priestess?

Does Jillian now wear the thong?

 
 

I’m not the queen, merely a keeper of the flame.

But I’m not denying that I sit at the computer in a PP thong writing this stuff either, now.

 
 

Jillian –

Now, now, you naughty preistess…that was HOT!

 
 

Now, when do you and Ukko put your thongs on?

 
 

What the hell taco bell? This is getting weirder and weirder.

Quothe Wha?: ‘I lack the weaponry

’nuff said

 
 

795 chrysanthamumz111111!

 
 

Now, wha?, I was never in the competition for “Dear” Marie–being the fine qu… fella I am, I stood aside, pointing and giggling like a wanton minx…
[now that just isn’t right–try it again!]
…like a leather-bound biker…
[that’s bettah, biach!]
{giggling like a leather-bound biker…WTF?!?}
…a leather-bound biker who was definitely not giggling, but was, instead, smirking and glowering…
[weak–but a save, nonetheless]
…and, er, ah, what the hell was I talking about?

 
 

Wow. The circle is now complete. Not only have long-missing commenters wha? and Ukko been relocated (pretty much through sheer, dumb luck), but the fella who started posting in this thread as GregH, but morphed at some point into Gregor Samsa. Now, bada-bing, bada-boom, it’s old school and GregH once more. Mercy, the weirdness never ends!

 
 

Hi guys what’s going on?

 
 

Oh Hi PupH! How are you? You lil scamp I love you so much!

 
 

Jillian, I’m not exactly sure what your young gay friend is looking to obtain–a friend with benefits? A fuckbuddy? But, whatever it is, I am not the expert in how to go about obtaining one.
If you’re a gay person, and you wish to meet other gay people, obviously, just hanging out in a “general public” situation is kinda a non-starter. Though, if it’s a fair-sized group of “normal, straight” people, just through sheer probability and percentages, there are likely a few other gay people in there; depending on the locale and the age range and social situation, they may not be too “out.” Another sad phenomena is the dreaded “straight guy who knows you’re gay, but likes to be flirted with.” Very annoying, but kinda fun at the same time. Beats the “I’m straight, goddamn it, and I’ll beat the crap outta any faggot that even looks funny at me, and did I mention I was STRAIGHT?!?” all to hell. Those fuckers are teh suxxor, and not in a good way.
Plus, in those “reflect the general population”-groups, being the “look–I am teh ghey guy” schtick can get old, fast. Not to say that I don’t go on and on about teh ghey once I feel comfortable about doing so–I’m just saying that it isn’t necessarily a good idea.
All that said, one cannot discount the ol’ “x-factor.” The irritating thing about sheer, dumb luck is that you can’t count on it, unless you’re one of those “so lucky, everyone hates you for your luck” people. Unsurprisingly, I hate them.
So, I guess my best advice is, “Be yourself–within reason!” That is to say, be youself, IF it’s safe to do so. Once you’ve gotten a bit of experience under your belt, you can scope out situations pretty quick, and know almost always when it’s safe to be out and when it isn’t. Larger metropolitan areas are generally better than rual, low-population ones, if only due to the odds (and safety in numbers)! Of course, as long as you don’t have the personality of Rush Limbaugh, you’ll likely cultivate at least a small circle of good friends, whether gay or straight, that you can always count on. That’s not to say that too many gay people haven’t been beaten up, or even murdered, for saying or doing something “gay” at the wrong place at the wrong time. I’ve been lucky enough to have never had that experience, though there’s been the odd close call. So, now I hate ME for my luck!
I don’t know if that was at all helpful, but I hope it was at least a little bit.

 
 

PupH? MomH?!? Oh, nooooooooz!!!one!!

 
 

Ooh! Looks like “Marq’s cheap advice for young kweahz” was teh 800.

 
 

I’m headed back to the main page. ‘cos I wanna read that exposé of a certain someone who will go unmentioned. There’s already a shitload of comments, which is gonna take 4evah for me to read! But, I’ll be backâ„¢, as Gov. Schwarzenwhosis has been known to quip.

 
 

One last note before I shuffle off–hey, Pinko, what do I get for teh 800? A Golden Onion Wiener? A 42″ Ion Canon? An AABJ (can’t–it’s against my ‘religion’)? A Milkshake Kit Kat? What?

 
 

If I start posting in the MJ Temple, do I get hazed or something?

 
 

Not at all. You just mustn’t say that antuchristangel is more teh hot than our venerated Marie. That would be grounds for excommunication!

 
 

“antichristangel” Sheesh.

 
 

Marq, your prize will be one shot with the Rolo Cannon. A gun that shoots the biggest Rolo ever known to exist. Link forthcoming to your chocolatey, yet caramel-filled ammo tomorrow. You could probably take out the ass half of LGF with one shot. OF course LGF is known as “the ass-faced beast” so it just depends. Alternatively, you may choose the target of your choosing.

 
 

Well, it’s practically daylight here in Illinois (new state motto: “We Fitzed Our Ex-Gov!”), and, so, high time for we vampire-types to hit the… coffin, and sleep the sleep of the damned, which will probably involve dreams of Yosef’s story about a Time Traveler’s visit… to his ass!!1! Feh. Well, better that than anything involving aa. Laterz, all!

 
 

“I’ve been lucky enough to have never had that experience, though there’s been the odd close call.”

Wow, post 800 makes me realize my hetero-privilege.

By the way, Jillian, I’ve been wearing my thong all along.

 
 

Marq, I really appreciate you taking the time to write that up for me.

I worry for my friend a lot sometimes – he lives in a fairly progessive metro area, but even that’s no guarantee that you won’t get assaulted for being gay. And then there’s just the general, day to day nastiness of always having to wonder if an offhand, quasi-flirtatious comment, whether serious or in jest, is going to cause friction between you and some insecure hetero you thought was your friend.

It depresses him. A lot. And that hurts me. Gah, people suck, don’t they?

 
 

Gee, teh p4c3 has really slowed here in Long Threadvilleâ„¢! I guess, noe that the Gary Ruppert II thread is for all practical intents and purposes dead, we’re no longer feel teh h34t of an upstart thread, so we’re coolin’ it, taking it easy… well, fark that! We’ll never make 1000 at this rate, let alone the 1204 or so doubling of the GRII thread! In a “pouf,” Ukko, Wha?, and GregH/Gregor Samsa are all gone, again. Pinko’s still lurking about, and Jillian’s still here–you are teh high priestess of this thread! And I bet celticgirl’s still around, somewheres. Hmm, a small crew, but a silly one! Huzzah! We’ll limp across the finish line yet! I go now to espy the comment count in the hated GRII thread, damn it, damn it to heck!!

 
 

Ah, you see, typo correction–it’s how I swell any thread to Olympian proportions! “now that the GRII thread….” grr. L8rz!

 
 

Ha! The GRII, aka antichristangel thread’s count hasn’t budged in days, not since before it dropped off the main page! Again, I say ‘HA!’ It is to larf!!1!one Wait… what if its seeming deadness is merely a ploy, a mere bit of playacting designed to lull us poor, simple Long Threadersâ„¢ into a false sense of security? A ruse? Only to roar back to life when we’re not looking, and go zipping past us while we snooze! Damn! It’s fiendishly clever, I tells ya!1!! *grumble, mutter, snarfle* Aauugghhh! It’s the suspense that’s killing me! plus, I just realized that it’s too damned late to go see “Silent Hill” tonight! AAaarrrgghhh!! Oh, poo–now I’m in a snit!

 
 

Marq: oh we WILL push past 1000, don’t you worry about it. As long as I have breath, I will see this thing through to the bitter end!

We few, we happy few…

 
 

We need some corndogs.

 
 

There are these really yummy vegetarian tofu corndogs that I am especially fond of….if wer’re going to have corndogs, I’m going to make a request for these.

 
 

Wait…wouldn’t they be called cornfudogs?

 
 

wha?, there’s no ‘u’ in my name dammit.

So I don’t understand how people found out that AA was AB (or something.)

 
 

Is a high kick in swing dancing too lascivious for y’all?

 
 

NO VEGGIE CORNDOGS EVAR!
/mommie dearest

anywho, when does Marq wake up because I made him a special thingy at 3B, which cg deigns to visit once and awhile but not Jillypants.

 
 

I come to visit sometimes….but y’all are just so much cooler than me that I am too much in awe of teh kewl to say anything.

I’m in love with your doggies, though.

 
 

I am going to be officially (but temporarily) unemployed come this Friday…what shall we do to celebrate?

If you bring the corndogs, I’ll bring the thongs!

 
 

THing is some people think they need to “get” it, but we decided long ago that ti wasn’t about getting it, it’s about playing along!

Think fafblog, only a lot less genius, but more cobags, rolos, take5s, and the delightfulness of GregH who never posts, but when he does it is always good. Oh hey, MomH!

Unemployed? That calls for PeePo thongs and COstco size case o’ corndogs!

Remember Fridays are Secret Raining Chundermuffin Days at 3B!

Plus HNT on THursday featuring the delightful stylings of Smokey Dog and Puglsey/

 
 

I’m also in love with anyone who has such cute doggies, too!

Doggies rule my world. Cats are good, too – but there’s nothing like the love of a good dog.

I think that I will wear nothing but my PeePo thong until I start work again, in celebration of my newfound freedom!

But I may have to hold off on the corndogs, if I can’t have cornfudogs.

I just found this new stuff called quorn that I’m going to try for dinner tonight…I’ll have to let you know how that works out.

 
 

Hey Pinko Punko – I read up thread you made a reference to the Morg. Are you an exmo, too?

 
 

Just lived in Ootah for a loooong time, BillyD.

Jillian that’s a LOT of feedom, you might want to ration it. The PeePo thong is powerful stuff.

I already have VegBoy Gregor Samsa constantly degrading me, now Jillypants too.

 
 

I caught the special, request appearance of the chundermuffinz o’ doom. Sweet! I just have one question, which I refuse to ask over at 3B, ‘cos I don’t want to look like a maroon: what the hell does “HNT” stand for?

 
 

When I was 20 (roughly 5 years ago) I did the Keruoac thing and ended up living in Provo for a year. Crazy, crazy place. I dated a girl from Manti. Holy crap – southern Utah is another planet.

 
 

*wag wag wag*

 
 

I’m not even a vegetarian anymore…just a (mostly)health-concsious eater. I eat chicken and tuna, but only in really small quantities.

Although that’s probably even more annoying.

Like – for dinner tonight, I’m having grilled curried tofu. On brown rice.

It’s really good. I swear it is – stop laughing.

But your cute doggies still rock my world. I would feed them corndogs all day.

 
 

Marq, HNT=Half Naked Thursday.

 
 

Come on people, we’ll never crack 1000 at this rate. I swear, it’s like you don’t even care anymore!

 
 

Marq’s not feeling well, so we’re going to have to carry his share for a while.

I swear, with all the sickness going around here, I’m going to have to start posting some of my soup recipes!

Hey….today is my last day of work, so y’all have to help me celebrate! I want everybody in their PeePo thongs sitting at their keyboards at 9 PM, GMT for the party!!!

 
 

I’ll bring the corndogs.

 
 

Thong….check

Hey, where is everybody?

(Jillian: I was only givin’ you guys a hard time. I hope Marq and PP are feeling better. I’m finally feeling like a human being after 10 days of it).

Ummm…Happy Unemployment?! Let’s party!

 
 

I’m only unemployed until my teaching gig starts this fall. I’m incredibly nervous and incredibly excited all at once!

And I’m home from work now, so that’s it. No job for me.

Now, where’s that thong?

 
 

Actually, I’m feeling remarkably improved today, that is to say, “Shitty,” as opposed to “Super-ultra-mega-oh,gawd,takemeNOW-shitty,” which is how I was feeling yesterday. My slight fever broke, and certain other, Imodium-related symptoms stopped. Unfortunately, I still have a fair amount of bodyaches/headache going, and I’m still fairly nauseous.
And, in reality, this thread is still doing fairly well as far as comments/day goes. There were many months where there were between 0-2 comments posted to it. The current total is 838.

 
 

Glad to see you feeling better, Marq! Make sure you stay hydrated…it’s amazing how fast you can dehydrate when you’re sick.

 
 

BTW, aside from Jillian getting to ditch her job, today (4-26, in spite of Seb’s monkeywork) marks the 1000 days of Shrub left point. Huzzah! It’ll be good riddance to bad trash to that jerk come January of ’09.

 
 

Welcome (back?) to the unemployment world Jill! What level will you be teaching?

 
 

As long as people are willing to post recipes to build up the comments – any cheap college recipes that aren’t ramen?

 
 

You can’t go wrong with beans and rice – it’s incredibly easy and filling, and oh, so cheap. And it’s absolutely delicious, too.

All you need is a can of black beans, onion, green pepper, and some spices…saute the onions and pepper, throw the beans in, season, and put on top of rice.

The trick to making it really tasty is a splash of rice wine vinegar, but even without that, it’s damn good.

If you want to go really, really, really cheap, you can even use dried beans – but those are substantially more work.

I’m going to be teaching elementary school as part of a program to put highly motivated teachers into high-needs classrooms around the country. I’m going to get some of the most underprivileged kids in the country, and my goal is to get them reading on or above grade level – which, considering that they’re going to come into my classroom several grade levels behind, will be quite a challenge.

I’ve never been so excited about anything before, I don’t think. It’s a fabulous opportunity, and I’m thrilled to be a part of it.

 
 

Oooh… that was one wild party. I don’t know whether that was so smart, considering I’m not QUITE on the unemployed list yet.

 
 

Hey ho-hos, new HNT up at 3B!

MArq, there are real HNTs all over the internets, but at 3B! we defy the concept.

Also read the “My Children” post- you missed an extra apecial thingy- it was your 800 ocmment prize.

 
 

I’ll give this a try tonight – maybe even nnvest in the rice wine vinegar. Good luck teaching. It sounds difficult, but you also sound prepared for it.

 
 

Wow, Jillian! That’s a great thing you’ll be doing! It’s so nice that W and his NCLB will be able to help you out so much!

Or, well… nevermind.

Good luck!

But until then, Concha y Toro is a pretty decent wine and you can get 1.5 liters for around $8-9. That’ll help you enjoy your unemployment!

 
 

People? Hellooooooo? We’re not getting anywhere. I mean, sure aa could stink the place up and post another 20 “did not” “did so” posts here, but I think she’s given up on us. We must forge ahead. How amazing would it feel to post that #1000? I know I want it – I’ll bet you do too.

I’m done with teh sick, and back in fine form – Come on back and let’s get this thing done! This means you, Jillian. After all, you are the high priestess of this thread.

*roots around* Now where did that thong go?

 
 

Sorry to fall down on the job, but I had technical difficulties yesterday, which meant I had to find other stuff to do with my time than sit on the computer and read snark.

Did you know they make these things called books? They’re like analog webpages – they have actual “pages” that you “turn”! It’s incredible!

I will have to explore this new “book” phenomenon in greater detail and report back.

(My internet crashed last night, and only came back tonight, so I’ve been going through major withdrawal. I don’t know what I’m going to do when I have to go back to work!!)

 
 

Analog webpages, you say? How can you stand not seeing the text flicker gently before you? I’ll have to experience this “book” phenomenon through my A/D converter.

 
 

Anyone want to cyber?

 
 

Yosef – fine work at 3bulls. The ol’ Atrios switcheroo got a chuckle out of me.

 
 

Mmmmmm…………cheap wine………..

The one thing I miss the most about living on the west coast was being able to get really nice Sonoma chardonnays for under ten dollars a bottle.

 
 

we just drove through like a million sonoma wineries. but we were searching for a Sonic, so we didn’t stop.

hee.

 
 

Waaaah!

I have no Sonoma wine and no White Castle.

I am going back to bed.

 
 

Happy May Day!

 
 

A May Day present for y’all.

 
 

Happy Loyalty Day!

 
 

Happy May 2nd!

 
 

860, I think

 
 

Yeah, it was still May Day where I live. Damn Chermann time zones.

 
 

I figured it was either that or you had just got back from a may-day drinking binge.

 
 

No reason it couldn’t be both.

 
 

Sweet alcoholic oblivion. Sigh.

 
 

BillyD – thanks, I had fun doing that one. Only took me about an hour to get all the posts written, links embedded and published. That Atrios guy has us all snowed.

 
 

Tea, goddamn it! Green, motherfucking tea!!1!

 
 

Teabagging, Vittujen kevät! Kokematon, vitun teabagging!1!

 
 

Sheesh…I have an excuse for falling down on the job around here; I’m on vacation.

What’s yours?

 
 

That was me.

 
 

Finals week in full swing…. God damnit, I hate all-nighters.

 
 

As long as people are willing to post recipes to build up the comments – any cheap college recipes that aren’t ramen?

1. pint bottle of scotch or Irish Whiskey (any kind will do)
2. bottle of beer (preferably something large but decent, like Sheaf)
3. take one tub of cottage cheese and stir in 1/2 jar of salsa. Mix well.
4. use tortilla chips to scoop out yummy goodness and eat.
5. enjoy

Items #3 & #4 are optional.

 
 

Thank goodness that some of you have posted after J Johnson–I never know what to say in response to the Finnish swearing. It was Finnish, wasn’t it? Well, whatever that was….

 
 

It was an attempt at Finnish. I’m not a native speaker. All you really need to say is some variation on vittu.

 
 

BTW, that’s the bestest recipe evah!!1!

 
 

Hmm, a lull in the conversation.

 
 

Yeah. It’s quiet in here. Too quiet….

 
 

Don’t look at me….I spent all night having cute gay guys with charming southern accents buy me shots. I mean, I love you guys and all, but these were young, cute gay boys. And they kept buying me drinks. And they liked my shoes.

So I’ve been busy lately.

Two conclusions can be drawn from this:

1.) I am rapidly on my way to becoming the biggest fag hag in this quadrant of the galaxy, and

2.) If I keep hanging out in gay bars, there’s a good chance I will remain single for the rest of my life.

You’ll have to pardon me if this doesn’t make too much sense….I’m not quite sure what was in the shots I had last night, and I’m still feeling a bit woozy this morning.

 
 

Speaking of feeling woozy… Jillian, you’ve inspired a wake and bake.

~whoa~

 
 

That was me. I think.

 
 

[jealousy so hot it could burn the sun, regardless of the sense in being jealous in the first place]

 
 

The proverb “You are not what you think you are, but you are what you think.”

Does not make any logical sense, especially to me as I am ladyboy, and I think myself of a girl. So how cn you explain that

 
 

AHA!

Caught you with your various pants down.

 
 

That’s only those hottie queer boiz that Jillian is hanging out with, Pinko. And, my jealousy has just about dissipated, ‘cos tomorrow is the official beginning of IML (NOT NECESSARILY WORK SAFE!)! At last!

The first sightings of leathermen in the Palmer House lobby, Wednesday May 24.

My, how the staff at the Palmer House must look forward to this time of year! I hope those leatherboiz tip their maids and such well, ‘cos besides the Shriners, those IML dudes have gotta have the greatest mess potential….

 
 

Whew. eveyone made it, didn’t they?

 
 

Still going…like the Energizer Bunny, the thread that would not die!

 
 

How come this thread isn’t in the August, ’05 archives anymore (or, at least seemingly–the pix seem different there)? Oh, and 886, bitchez!

 
 

Is this where I go to find out Gavin M’s secret identity?

 
 

Hey, this thread isn’t so long.

 
 

Yeah, you would say that, Shaggy. Guys insecure over their length always put down others.

 
 

June.

June June June.

Moon.
Soon.
‘Toon.
Rune.
Coon.
Boone.
Dune.
‘Shrooms….

 
 

goodness gracious, Marq! Isn’t he yummy enough to eat with a spoon, whoever he is.

I’m so, so tired. Just got back from tallahassee a day ago and I leave for Atlanta next week.

I think I’m having too much fun. Someone wake me when it’s over.

 
 

That’s Ian Somerhalder, best know from being on season one of “Lost,” “The Rules Of Attraction” (in which he plays a queer boy who’s obsessed with the straight James Van Der Beek–he fantasizes a sex scene, which is amusing ‘cos it’s lots hotter than the sex scene James has in the movie’s ‘real life’), and from crappy, low-budget horror movies like the recent “Pulse.” Out of all that stuff, while “Rules” is amusing, if you see someone carting about the DVD box of “Lost,” borrow it, it’s great fun. Leaves off at an extremely annoying point, though.

 
 

107 to go astronutz!!!

 
 

*sniff* nobody even missed me! I’ve been gone like for two weeks, but do you lot care? Huh?

Whatevs.

 
 

Oh so that’s what that heaviness in my heart was all about. Glad that you’re back.

 
 

I missed you, cg. a LOT.

You left me alone with a bunch of smelly boys. I’ve been burning incense all over the place, to no avail.

Now I’m off to Hotlanta for a month, which should be all kinds of awesome.

The only thing depressing me at the moment is that the new science teacher in my town’s high school is convinced that pterodactyls are dinosaurs. You have no idea how this depresses me. I need someone to say something clever and science-y to cheer me up, stat!

 
 

Jillian-please don’t leave me alone with teh stinky! (You will be checking in from Hotlanta, right? Please say yes!)

I don’t have anything very science-y to cheer you up except an interesting article I ran across about how crows have humanlike intelligence:

http://news.nationalgeographic.com/news/2006/06/060606-crows.html

Crows are cool.

(Oh, and 895 BITCHEZ!)

 
 

Oops! That was actually 896, and this one is 897 BITCHEZ!!!11!!one!

Gregor: thanks. Nice to be back. Sometime I’ll tell you guys why I was gone so long…..

 
 

I need someone to say something clever and science-y to cheer me up, stat!

Well, it could be worse. He could lump ’em in with birds, the way the Bible does bats. And the Bible, being the WORD of Gawd can’t be wrong, can it?
Hmm. That probably didn’t help much.

Hey, look! The next comment is #900!!1!

 
 

Only 100 to go til we break teh interwebs!!!!111one!

Whooo hooooo!!1!!

 
 

At some time between now and comment #1000, I swear that I shall Godwin this thread.
Why?

Because I’m evil, of course!

 
 

OK, kids, it’s “cliché post” time once again, the fun, fun, FUN game that you play at home, too!
“Say! It’s quiet in here tonight… Too quiet!!”

 
 

Gawd, that was just too much fun! Now I gotta go hose myself off, inside and out.

 
 

Ah, shit! I’ve doomed the rest of this thread to italics!!! Damn, damn, damn!!!

 
 

We’re going to have to think up a suitable punishment for you because of this, Marq.

 
 

There I fixed it for you. Just don’t let it happen again.

 
 

You let him off way too easy, Gregor.

I think this calls for a spanking.

 
 

If you must but just make sure you close the spanking tag!

 
 

I say we try and get the bold, strike-thru, and link tags all stuck on, too*.

*I have appealed to Gavin for help, so we’re probably doomed.

 
 

To fix open tags all you have to do is close the tag at the start of the next comment. Anyone can do it.

 
 

Why would I want to close the spanking tag? That would end all my fun.

You need a spanking for even suggesting it.

On a less whimsical note, I am in the middle of my summer training institute for this teaching-in-low-income-communities project I signed up for, and I am learning things about the nature of exhaustion that even going to school full time while working full time could not teach me. They’re basically putting us through the equivalent of an M.Ed. program while we teach summer school at the same time. I imagine this must be much like what a medical ER residency is like – there really is no way that you can actually complete all the work they assign you, so you prioritize by figuring out which work you can skip without seriously screwing up the rest of someone’s life.

Despite the exhaustion and the occasional tears, I love it. Everyone always bitches about the quality of education in America today – I’m excited to be privileged enough to be in a position to do something besides just bitch.

And you’ll have to excuse the grammar atrocities I’m sure are lurking in here – I got maybe four hours of sleep last night and I’m looking to do the same tonight.

I miss you crazy kids.

 
 

Hmm… let’s see…

 
 

Um, Mr. Samsa? Methinks thou art wrong in regards to tag closure. Or, to put it another way, let’s see you close the damned tag ifyou’resosmart!

 
 

I already closed the italics tag above. But we’ll try it again I’m leaving the italics tag open.

 
 

Hey who was the nincompoop who left the italics tag open!!! What a cobag!!!1

 
 

There all better.

 
 

And I think that you already closed your own bold tag. Force of habit!! Hee Hee

 
 

Jillian, that’s great! Is it Teach for America?

 
 

Gregor, I am indeed doing Teach for America.

It’s exciting as hell, despite the massive frustration and exhaustion. I’m teaching World history in summer school right now, and get to deliver a lesson plan on Adam Smith and Karl Marx tomorrow – as soon as I finish writing the lesson plan for the third time. There’s something especially thrilling about the idea of trying to find a way to get a bunch of urban Atlanta youth to get hooked by some of the most influential words and ideas ever put down on paper by humanity.

I should hit you guys up for ideas about cool educational devices to use in my lesson plans. If you have any thoughts or clever handouts or graphics in mind that are appropriate for seventeen year olds who are reading several grade levels below standard, let me know. I’ll trade recipes for ’em – I’ve got a mushroom risotto that is to die for, and a coconut-lime-banana-rum bread that will rock your world. I’ve also got a vegetarian shepherd’s pie that’s better than the real thing.

 
 

Jilly Pants, there is some puppy love oer at 3B, plus you missed PupH, the 3rd cutest dog on the internets.

 
 

Speaking of cutie pooches, I finally got around to putting up a Flickr page with pix of my dorg, whose name I *really* didn’t steal from Pinko-he came with name already attached. I’ll be putting up more occasionally-I want to avoid any where dad or I am in them clearly. Or, the house from the outside.

 
 

Italics?

 
 

Bupkis!

 
 

More doggie pictures, please!

The amount of work I have to do right now – and the sheer stupidity of a lot of it – is proving to be a real downer. So I need extra cuteness.

Marq’s doggie scores a 5 on the cuteness rubric (which only goes from 1-4, btw). I’m getting two years’ worth of educational pedagogy shoved into my head in a month, so everything nowadays seems to come out in teacher-speak – my apologies.

Whoever wrote the history standards for the state of Georgia has some pretty serious cobag issues, I fear. I can’t believe some of the stuff I have to teach.

I can’t wait to get back to Miami. I’m pooped.

 
 

Jillian true cuteness revealed here . Although, Marq’s pup is cute enough for a big guy!

 
 

I’ll put up more pup pix in July–evidently, I reached my limit this month already, though for the life of me, I can’t find what that limit is on Flickr’s site. Does anybody know if there’s a faq or anything? I mean, I uploaded 19 pix, which is a very strange number to be a maximum. I was actually trying to send up another 16, so I kinda think the monthly total is 20 and the 19 + the 16 would have been over the limit, so it rejected all of ’em rather than take one. Feh!

 
 

The 3Bulls! account has a 20Mb/month limit so it’s not the number of pictures but the size. You can try saving the pictures in a lower quality format in order to upload more.

 
 

I am sooo loving all the doggie pics – I check ’em frequently, and they always make me smile! You guys are all kinds of awesome!

I have to work on the Fourth, so I’m stuck home alone the night before with nothing but a new biography of Stalin to keep me company, so if anybody’s around, say hi to me here – it will be way more congenial company than Comrade Stalin is.

 
 

Yeah, I finally found Flickr’s TAQ, and you’re absolutely right. Still, I updated Smokey’s pics full-size again, put up 12 more which used about 2/3rds of my allotment for July. Handily, the export plug-in I use in iPhoto shows me remaining bandwidth, so I don’t have to sign in to Flickr to find that out. Up to the version I’m using, it was free. Now, the developer has released version 2.0, and it’s shareware. Grr.

 
 

Hey! Dead, sociopathic commie dictators need company too!

 
 

Don’t they eva1!

 
 

Well it’s almost the one year anniversary of this here thread…

 
 

Oh, man!

Everybody HAS to post on the threadiversary! It’ll be a big ol’ party!

I’ll bring the two tone CDs and the chartreuse.

See, this is why I never get invited to parties – that sounds like a lot of fun to me, and I know that to everybody else, it sounds like a Vogon poetry recital.

But everyone still has to post, regardless.

 
 

For the threadiversary, should we link from a post on the front page, or should we keep this little clubhouse a “secret?”

 
 

The bestest threadiversary present ever would be 1,000 posts

 
 

Well. BillyD, only 64 to go. ‘Course, we only have ’til August 5th, so get typing!

 
 

If you had a friend who was feeling down and lonely, what would you do to cheer him up?

 
 

Well, I’m feeling down and lonely. Any suggestions? (P.S. I’ve had just about the worst week of my life, so be gentle)

 
 

…and you know, I just realized the reason I got to this thread so late was that it is also the 1 year anniversary of when I left the states to move “across the pond” – and I was without my beloved broadband for a couple of months.

So, another thing to celebrate! Yay! (seriously, I love y’all, but I’m much happier here than I was in the states).

 
 

Awww, I’m sorry you’re having a crummy week, cg!

I think a summer weekend getaway is in order. Preferably to some place that serves drinks in little coconut shells.

Just keep telling yourself that you could be having all of the same problems – only Bush could still be your president. That would be worse. Much worse.

I’m envious.

 
 

Actually, my sweetie and I are heading out with our little caravan to Whitby on the east coast of Northern Engand (the ruined abbey on the cliff was part of the inspiration for Bram Stoker when he was writing ‘Dracula’). So, while not tropical, it will just be the two of us (well, and the dog) on a camping adventure.

It is a much needed break from caring for my son, who has severe autism (he will be at a respite facility).

Thanks for the kind words…although in fairness, I’ve traded in Bush for the poodle that is Blair. And I once jokingly said to my partner “The Queen is not the boss of me” and he patiently reminded me that actually, as long as I want to live here, she is. So, I lost a king wannabe and gained a poodle and a queen…

 
 

In all fairness, world leaders often leave something to be desired. They’re often venal and stupid and corrupt and hypocritical, etc., etc. But then, you compare ’em to Shrub, and all of a sudden they start looking like Lincoln and Roosevelt and Churchill and Gandhi. It’s not really fair that he makes such a collection of malcontents, ingrates, and anacephalus morons look good by contrast, the bastard. Why, oh why do we always wind up grading on a curve? I hated that back in school, where a handful of idiots could drag *my* grade down some, and I hate it in the body politic now. Feh!
Oh, and cg, hope you week improves. If we’re not in the midst of WWIII by next week, consider yourself ahead!

 
 

Celticgirl, just so you know…

People like you, who take care of those who need it and generally just get their business done while still smiling – you guys are the real heroes of the world.

Never forget that.

 
 

Jillian-

Thanks for that. It means a lot…

 
 

Yowza! I had to be out for about four hours, and in that time the “For Mal de Mer” thread went from 68 comments to 175. Jeebus! And, the bulk of them were from about 4 people. BTW, Jillian, I think a certain somebody was unduly harsh to you, because what you thought in that situation was completely understandable, and trying to shame you for what you *already* felt bad about was uncalled for.

 
 

I really appreciate that, Marq. Thanks.

It’s why I bowed out. I’m not going to sink to that level. I don’t control anybody else or tell anybody else what to do, but I also try damn hard not to fall to the lowest common denominator, either.

People are so weird sometimes – not just in this, but in general, you know? I don’t get people most of the time. It’s why I stay home and read a lot.

 
 

How’s the heat treatin’ everyone?

 
 

The heat has driven me to negative values on the motivation scale.

Not only do I not do anything, but merely being in my presence makes it impossible for anyone else to do anything, either.

 
 

I know what you mean Jill – I’m really backed up on research I should be doing, but I just can’t get myself to do it. Maybe more beer will solve this dilemma…

 
 

What dilemma wouldn’t it solve?

 
 

Glorious rain for us today after a week of temperatures over 105. Generally that’s life for us in the desert but it’s brutal nonetheless.

We’d better get cranking if we want 999 comments by the threadaversary. I think we should take it to 999 and see how long we can resist the temptation of the 1000th comment.

 
 

You’re playing with fire Gregor – there’s no way I could resist the siren’s song of the 1,000th comment for long. Just think…. soon the internets will crumble!!! Maybe we should use this to get some ransom cash out of someone, a la Dr. Evil.

 
 

The 1000th comment is MINE, bitchez!!!

Try and stop me.

 
 

I think I had one of the x00ths waaaaaaaay upthread, so I’ll drop out once it gets within, say, 10. Did we ever decide whether we want to keep this a “secret clubhouse,” or if we wanted to link to it on a thread still up on the main page? My suggestion: after we attain at least 1000 comments, then we link, allowing the hoi polloi to experience the sheer hugeosity of Teh Long Threadâ„¢. Some o’ those scalawags will shit themselves. Others will just point at us and laugh. Good times.

 
 

Oh, yeah… 45, bitchez!!!1

 
 

44 now – and I’m feeling much better since my little break. If it makes you guys feel any better we are gettng a freaking heat wave here in SCOTLAND!!!one11!! Do you realize how far north that is of y’all? I mean, we’re practically into the land of the midnight sun here – when the solstice came round in June our sunset was happening like at 11:00pm. Seriously, this is NOT ok.

I’ve got a tropical passion flower growing in front of my house and man is it hap-hap-happy…um, global warming, anybody?

 
 

Global Warming is a liberal myth – everybody knows that. 😉

So my new job starts tomorrow, and I’m all nervous now. Excited, but nervous.

It’s going to be a long night.

 
 

We do love to talk about the weather don’t we? Two inches of rain here today and temps in the middle 80s – a respite for desert dwellers.

Jillian – Good luck with the job. You’ll do fine.

Marq – I don’t think we’ll have any say whether this thread is made public again…Big Brother is always watching.

 
 

Jillian: Good luck with the new job. I’m sure you’ll do great – and I really admire what you’re doing.

Whether or not the thread is made public again, we have to keep keeping on til we reach that magical 1000 and break teh interwebs.

So, what do you think will happen? Will the tubes all explode, or will computer screens across the world spew bytes all over their users? Could be interesting…

 
 

Are the SadNo! superCray3600 mainframes able to handle that fourth digit? Time will tell…time will tell…however I fear that it’ll be something akin to Y2K (perhaps Comment1K). Personally, I’m buying a generator, a rifle, a years supply of food, a kit that allows me to drink my own pee, and gasoline, plenty of gasoline.

 
 

Oh and duct tape and bailing wire.

 
 

We’re going to have to average about 8 comments a day to hit C1K by the threadiversary.
38!!

 
 

We might have to blather on about nonsense.

[crickets]

Oh, wait.
I’ve been doing that all along!

 
 

I made an oblique reference to the C1K and the threadiversary in a post at 3B! I expect the comments to start pouring in….hee hee!

NO BLATHERING THIS IS SERIOUS!!!1

 
 

It’s my firm belief that at comment 999 all posters on this thread will be raptured.

 
 

Jillian, how’s the job?

BillyD, raptured to where and by whom? I hope to be touched by an Angelhair…

 
 

Tigrismus – that kind of questioning of beliefs is what will keep you from being raptured.

 
 

Sign me up for the rapturewagon!

Chickety Check! I hope the G-d man doesn’t fling me into the non-briar patch that is hell a la Jack Chick says.

 
 

Come on people, get cracking! It looks like it’s up to us – we few, we happy few – to get this thing done.

Oh, if we could only get Marie herownbadself to post here just.one.more.time….

That would seal the Rapture deal!!!!one!!1eleven!!

 
 

Hey Marq/PP-could you lure Marie here with a linky? What do you think?

 
 

Oh – and 30 BITCHEZ!!! C1K w00t!!!

 
 

You know what would really suck? If we got to comment #999 and all held back, waiting for Jillian to post #1000. But she’s busy with the nouveaux job and doesn’t log on to here for most of the day. Then, in swoops annieangel (she knows where this thread is, let us not forget), who posts comments #1000-1005. Everything is ruined!!1 Well, this calls for a preemptive strike, if anything ever did!
Darn you, annieangel! Darn you to HECK!!1!
Though, it’d almost be OK if Marie Jon’ did it.

29

 
 

First day at work…no kids yet. They come next week, so I have a few days to try to get my classroom set up, maybe write a few lesson plans, see if I can possibly score a few desks for my kids to sit at or something. You know – the usual.

Yeah, I have almost no desks in my room. It’s pretty crazy.

But so far, it’s awesome. The faculty at my school are just the most friendly, supportive, funny people I’ve ever had the privilege to work with, and I’m really optimistic about the possibilities for this year. At least, I will be if I can find time to write some lesson plans before Monday.

And the best part of all? I’m teaching American government.

I can’t think of anything that could possibly be more fun. I think I’ll be all Socratic about it, and try telling the kids that our government is, structurally speaking, not democratic at all, and make them try to defend the principle that it is.

I have incredible amounts of work to do in the next few days, but I’m also incredibly excited about it. If only I can get my kids to read on something approximating grade level, I can die a happy woman….I’ve heard from other teachers at my school that incoming freshmen usually read on a third to sixth grade level – with some at what’s called “pre-reading” level (they know their letters, but don’t know how to put them together to make sounds).

It’s heartbreaking to think about….why do we let our young people end up in this situation? Why is it that we’re the richest country in the industrialized world, yet have the lowest adult literacy rate in the industrialized world? It’s criminal.

I’m going to bed…I’m pooped. Y’all play nice, and save me some cake from the Breaking Teh Intarwebs Party if I miss it!

 
 

IF anyone wants to get MJ, link her column from a comment here and we’ll all click over 500 times. If she watches her site-meter, she might come over.

I am being besquelched by a total cobwad at 3B. I may be dead before the rapture.

 
 

Oh, Pinko, I didn’t mean it when I called everyone a lumpgeyser! And then I tempted fish to create the mecha-Cheney… Forgive! Forgive!

 
 

I’m assuming this joke has already been made, but isn’t mecha-cheney redundant?
976!

 
 

NO! It’s perfectly true that he couldn’t possibly be any more evil than he already is, but consider what will result when you add that infinite capacity for evil to a deathless being with super-smiting-strength, the ability to be constantly active(instead of having to s