Finnish-talking Open Thread

Well, let’s just see what’s more popular around here — Marie Jon’ or the enchanting and sonorous Finnish language.

mina rakastan.gif

[UPDATE – Finnish-language discussion shockingly cancelled for lack of interest. Official making-fun-of-Gavin-M. thread.]


Comments: 53


You can ring my be-e-ell, ring my bell (ring my bell, ding-dong-ding)
You can ring my be-e-ell, ring my bell (ring my bell, ring-a-ling-a-ling)

That’s Finnish, right?


Here’s a question (it’s not Finnish-related, but it has to do with a Scandanavian country, so it’s close enough):

Do you think Swedish people get offended when they say the Swedish Chef on the Muppets? I mean, do they watch it and go, “Hurr, hurr, we do not-uh talk-uh like-uh that! I’m so mad, I’m going to beat a chickie and put it in thee pot-uh!”


Uh no, that’s Anita Ward.

This is going to be a totally-making-fun-of-me open thread, I can see it starting already.


I’ve been angry and sad about things that you do
I can’t count all the times that I’ve told you we’re through
And when you go, when you slam the door
I think you know that you won’t be away too long
You know that I’m not that strong
Just one look and I hear a bell ring
One more look and I forget everything, oooh

Mamma Mia, here I go again
My, my, how can I resist you
Mamma Mia, does it show again
My, my, just how much I missed you

or something like that


With regard to Swedes, I spend some months on a tour bus with a Swedish gentlemen, but my scheme to force him to watch the Swedish Chef and collect his opinions never quite worked out. However, he did take great joy in pointing out all the Volvos and Saabs we passed on the road, and he had inhuman luck on slot machines. I mean, who the hell consistently wins money on slot machines? Obviously the Swedes possess eerie powers and are not to be trifled with.


The lsat time I tried using Finnish, the person I was talking to asked why I was offering him some cold potatoes, but I can try.

Why can’t we have both Marie Jon’ and Finnish? She can play the Maiden of the North from the Kalevala, while you and her other lover play Vainamoinen and Ilmarinen? Sadly, No will be the Sampo, the giver of all good things.

What’s weird is that the dialect my grandparents used is different from what most Finns use today. I think they used the formal you or something, but it’s all beyond me.

Sinun iso?iti lestadiolaiset? If so, you might know about Lapp Mary, the heroine of the saga of the conversion of Laestadius. Is it any coincidence that our favorite troll is also name Mary (Marie, same thing)?


The Saami people abandoned the remnants their cool shamanism when Laestadius came around evangelizing and calling beer the devil’s vomit. But even Laestadius seemed to still believe that in the underground spirits that came out near the North Pole. Saami magic is where the Swedes got their power from during that big war in Europe (Thirty Years War or something).

PS: Marie Jon’ gives me a pikku puinen poika.


I want Sadly, No! to be all Marie’, all the time. She’ and pee-poo make my life worth livin.


Oh, so now you change the thread, eh? Well, in that case, I’ll say that Marie Jon raises YOUR pikku puinen poika to attention.


Some advice for you, Gavin, on how to woo Louhi’s daughter Marie can be found in the Kalevala here:

Marie, Tuo oli kaunis PP neiti, maan kuulu, ve’en valio.


Oh Marie, from your sky-born maiden’s fingers,
you weave webs of wondrous beauty.

Niiet vaskiset vatisi, hope’inen pirta piukki
neien kangasta kutoissa, hope’ista huolittaissa.


OH Finnish!


When I was teaching English in Taipei in the late 80’s, I hooked up with a Danish girl, who, upon hearing a reference to the Muppets, went into a twenty minute tirade regarding the Swedish Chef in particular and American boorishness in general. “Do Americans really think we sound like that?” She was nice but didn’t have much of a sense of humour.


The Finnish discussion got cancelled? And here I was, all worked up to hear hot talk on the adessive.


Where would we be without Finland? (Link goes to Monty Python song).

If you’ve ever been to Finland, you know nothing beats Finnish cuisine. (olen ilveillen).


From what I understand, thanks to the Finns, Paul Hackett is winning a stunning upset tonight.


OT, but I gotta know – I asked Marie on the open Marie thread, but she’s not responding right now:

What’s that damned Bible verse the wingnuts are always quoting when they want to talk about the leadership being “ordained by God” or whatever? I have a whole wingnut distribution list that needs to hear about God’s choice in the OH special election, but I can’t find the verse anywhere.


Wouldn’t it be hot if Marie Jon’ spoke in Finnish? Of course it might be kinda hot if she mastered English too.

Added bonus for her – we wouldn’t be able to critique her Finnish grammar, spelling or content.

Marantha! (That’s Finnish for I am God’s chosen one and you aren’t – nannynannyboooboo).


“We had the stars up there,” said Huck, “And we use to lie on our backs and look up at them and discuss ’bout whether they was made or just happened. Jim he allowed that the stars was made, but I allowed they just happened. Jim said the Moon could’a laid them; Well, that looked kind of reasonable so I didn’t say nothing against it. I’ve seen a frog lay most as many, so of course it could be done.”


Oops! Wrong Finn.

It does tie in neatly with the prez supporting ID though, don’t it. That’s what you gotta love about S,N!. If you wait around long enough, it all comes together.


One of the best Twain lines ever.


You are hereby notified! Speaking Finnish is against the laws of the bog!


VB brings up a very good point (No, not about speaking Finnish). I think it’s high time we established what the laws of this bog are. After all, we know there is no spirit here except sheer contempt for God and the USA. But, there must be more! This community of bog dwellers needs RULES, dammit!So, to recap: the dwellers of this bog need some rules. Here’s what we have so far:
1. Sheer comtempt for God 2. Sheer contempt for the USA. 3. No speaking Finnish.Think people, think! (or should that be PeePo?)


Not speaking Finnish, I have to vote for Marie Jon’, but it seems like she doesn’t want to play at this bog anymore.
PS I think Hackett is going to lose, any chance he will run for the senate?


Hackett came within under 4%. That’s a major swing from previous elections. Charlie Cook (moderate GOPer) said anything under 5% would be awful for the GOP.


Hey girly boy come take me on!


bog or Gavin?

someone explain tht smell!


In defense of Gavin that smell did begin a week or so ago when Sadly, No was converted to a Bog. Comes with the terriotory I guess. Happily, after the olfactory fatigue set in I hardly notice it any more.

Speaking of smells, I bet Marie Jon’ smells purty.


RED ALERT – My internet stalking, I mean research, of the Marsala brood has come up with yet another klansman: Chicken Tikka Marsala. Google her, she’s got to be related to Marie and Kerry!


I….got nothing to say.

Best Seinfeld bit ever. George waits for Jerry’s machine to pick up, and then he’s got nothin.

Which is more that what I have.


I’m back, did I miss anything?

…Yoink! Wait a minute, people were actually talking about Finnish — and I missed it!

Curses! Gah! Perkele!


I was going to post my old family recipe for Lutefisk Marsala, but I guess I won’t now.

Chris Moorehead

Is putting a gratuitous apostrophe after one’s surname a Finnish practice?


It is, but they would also have to use various umlauts and put a slash through and occasional ‘o’. Or is that Norwegian?


Der Toon O’ Today (is that pigeon-Finnish or German): Educating Diversely


What’s Finnish for D’OH!!!


I am part Saami, I have a Nokia and I drive a Saab. So I guess I rate around a 7 on the Scandimeter.


Somehow I feel like the Finnish discussion didn’t end satisfactorily. Almost as though it was un-Finnished.


Uuma ma’ ten’ rashwe, ta tuluva a’lle.

Oh, sorry. Thought you said ELVish.


One of the best Twain lines ever.

Allow me to present my favorite Twain passage ever, The Raftman’s Passage. I wish I could have this played over a loudspeaker before I enter a room:

‘Whoo-oop! I’m the old original iron-jawed, brass-mounted, copper-bellied corpse-maker from the wilds of Arkansaw!?Look at me! I’m the man they call Sudden Death and General Desolation! Sired by a hurricane, dam’d by an earthquake, half-brother to the cholera, nearly related to the small-pox on the mother’s side! Look at me! I take nineteen alligators and a bar’l of whiskey for breakfast when I’m in robust health, and a bushel of rattlesnakes and a dead body when I’m ailing! I split the everlasting rocks with my glance, and I squench the thunder when I speak! Whoo-oop! Stand back and give me room according to my strength! Blood’s my natural drink, and the wails of the dying is music to my ear! Cast your eye on me, gentlemen!?and lay low and hold your breath, for I’m bout to turn myself loose!…Whoo-oop! I’m the bloodiest son of a wildcat that lives!’

‘Whoo-oop! bow your neck and spread, for the kingdom of sorrow’s a-coming! Hold me down to the earth, for I feel my powers a-working! whoo-oop! I’m a child of sin, don’t let me get a start! Smoked glass, here, for all! Don’t attempt to look at me with the naked eye, gentlemen! When I’m playful I use the meridians of longitude and parallels of latitude for a seine, and drag the Atlantic Ocean for whales! I scratch my head with the lightning, and purr myself to sleep with the thunder! When I’m cold, I bile the Gulf of Mexico and bathe in it; when I’m hot I fan myself with an equinoctial storm; when I’m thirsty I reach up and suck a cloud dry like a sponge; when I range the earth hungry, famine follows in my tracks! Whoo-oop! Bow your neck and spread! I put my hand on the sun’s face and make it night in the earth; I bite a piece out of the moon and hurry the seasons; I shake myself and crumble the mountains! Contemplate me through leather?don’t use the naked eye! I’m the man with a petrified heart and biler-iron bowels! The massacre of isolated communities is the pastime of my idle moments, the destruction of nationalities the serious business of my life! The boundless vastness of the great American desert is my enclosed property, and I bury my dead on my own premises!…Whoo-oop! bow your neck and spread, for the pet child of calamity’s a-coming!’


Maybe we can wrap this up the way the Finns often do:


hehe man that stuff is vile


Golly, I hope I hear from Marie. I sent her an e-mail:

What’d you do with the Sadly, Yes! site? I thought it was wonderful. They really deserve a good dressing down. Filth! Utter trash!

BTW, have you gotten a thong from the PP store yet? I’m kinda uneasy ordering one. Are they comfortable?


Light posting today. Is it a Finnish holiday?


I’m shocked, shocked. There is no insult that is worse than calling a person a SwedeFinn. & you have allowed comments about Swedes! My God, man, have you no compassion? Swearing in Finn is actually very interesting, but don’t tango & swear in Finnish.


Please provide examples of interesting ways to swear in Finnish, R Penn. I’m curious to see if Finnish cursing is as colorful as the Russian variety.
Is it wierd that I have a distinct soft spot for Finns? Must be the combination of tango and profound melancholia.


Voi, Vitunlihakeitto! (Oh, soup-made-out-of-the-flesh-of-cunt!) You want to hear swearing in Finnish? Look no further, you kolmannen asteen turbomuna (turbod-ck of the third degree):


Well, I’m off to take a sauna:

If you pronounce it any way other than SOW-nuh, you can go suksi vittuun (ski into a cunt), you rekkamiehen pastilli (dried lump of shit dangling off the anal hair; dingleberry).




Well. I am Marie


Answer to Brad R. – swedes do not watch the muppets, and does certainly not have have any sense of humor!!!

From a guy in Norway (next to sewden, u know)


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