E-eevil scheme (and new contest!)

[Update and correction: American Daily is a wingnut site featuring Edward Daley, while the Daley Times-Post is Daley’s own daily wingnut site. You can see how confusion might take hold.]

While finishing the upcoming episode of An Assful of Secrets, our noir serial featuring Richard Widmark as a peripatetic French-Canadian anti-wingnut detective (yes, we know it’s behind schedule), we noticed that Atrios linked, sending readership temporarily through the roof.

Also, we noticed the submission guidelines below, posted at Edward Daley’s American Daily site — a fountain of news and commentary for unhinged wingnuts who find World Net Daily and Newsmax to be too intellectual and nuanced.

Edward Daley’s strangely fake-looking column portrait

Daley is our angry dittohead friend who suggests coating American military ammunition in pig’s blood, to help further America’s standing in the Muslim world.

So hey now, one realizes, these are two great things that taste great together! Welcome, O transient surge of Eschaton visitors, to the Web’s only mock right-wing punditry contest, featuring (heh heh) publication in American Daily — and prizes!

Submission Policy
By Neal (07/05/05)

All submissions are welcome and will usually be posted. AmericanDaily is here to provide information for the visitor not to be a censor.

If you are coming from the Left, please give me a heads up. (Just so I have an idea where to place the item)

This is actually kind of sporting, but leftish commentary appears in a little pink corral at the bottom of the page, while nearly everything else is stuff like, “Is Ted Kennedy a Traitor?” (Plus, we’ve been trying to get Adam Yoshida back as a guest poster, so we’re certainly no slouches at the collegial, everyone-gets-a-voice thing. If you see Adam, tell him we miss him.)

Please use “G” rated language in your text.

We can handle Word 2000 files if you wish to attach them.

Extensive use of italics can be a a pain for me to reproduce, so some may be ignored :=)

artcol^americandaily.com is the best address for you to submit content.

Consider using a subject that might pass thru multiple levels of SPAM filters:

Article, Submission, New Article,etc

Our contest rules differ in only one detail: The essay should not ‘come from the Left,’ but should be a beautiful, sterling example of right-wing idiocy, in an appropriate style. Groganesque, with wacky grammatical errors? Nerdy-creepy like Doug Giles? Evangelical, militaristic, anti-democratic, anti-gay, pro-torture? Just plain batshit-fucktard insane? America is about freedom, and the freedom is yours!

Submissions should go to artcol[at]americandaily.com, and should appear on American Daily’s main page. Don’t tell us when you submit something, but leave a comment owning up to the deed when the judging begins. Our main bit of fun in this will be in trying to spot which columns are comedy fakes. And so will theirs!

And unlike the Scrooge-McDucky contests over at the otherwise superior World O’ Crap, prizes WILL be awarded. Although in truth, they won’t be anything good, and might involve things like this:


Or these WorldNetDaily signature golf balls,

or this:


Because the biggest prize, after all, will be playing in the same league as Kaye Grogan, Pastor Swank, or (even) Ed Daley. Can anyone do it? Is it easy? Genius never is.


Comments: 9


I still say he looks like David Berkowitz.


Just did a Google image search for Berkowitz and, yeah, I see the resemblance, too. Does Ed’s neighbor have a dog, I wonder?


It doesn’t matter, I’ll always be thycwoti.


Writing idiotic commentary is harder than it looks. Good luck to y’all.


Yosef – i just thought I’d tell you that ever since you came clean about introducing “mars, bitches” to atrios, I curse your name on a regular basis.


“…I curse your name on a regular basis.”

Finally! Validation!


Hey Brad, did ya see how well Schilling pitched against the Charlotte Knights on Monday? Five runs on eight hits in five innings.


How cute, his face is made of bleached vanilla pudding.


With all due respect to Baron von Norbizness, I believe what Daley’s face is made of is actually The Stuff™ (Tagline: Are you eating it? Or is it eating YOU?).


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