Shorter Bob Owens
Posted on November 20th, 2008 by Brad
- Obamee’s a’comin’ t’ git our guns!! T’ git our guns!!! Stock up all th’ ammo y’can!!!! WOLVERINES!!!!!!!
‘Shorter’ concept created by Daniel Davies and perfected by Elton Beard. We are aware of all Internet traditions.™
Be a Wolverine, you’ll rule the hills
Just get some guns and Cheerios
Any kid can conquer Lybia
Just steal a fighter plane!
Barack Obama isn’t going to take your guns away.
Barack Obama isn’t going to shove the Fairness Doctrine down your throat.
Your inability to address the actual things Obama supports is telling.
Yo yo yo it’s all Confeezy Yankeezy up in yo charcoal greeeeeyull ya’ll if ya feels me say HOLLLAAAA. Seein you be crankin out librizzle spinizzle on my homes no you di’int, no you di’int if ya feels me say HOLLLAAAA. Obama be socializin the terrorizin of Real America and ya best gets yo’self out of the way or Yankeezy be poppin
Fear of a black planet! I love it!
Big manly macho men-men scared of the political version of Tiger Woods.
Gun owners are cowards. Need any more proof?
If you were certain that Obama’s Federal Government was going to take your guns, why would you spend all of your money trying to get more before they come to take them away? Do any of these people actually expect to win a shootout with the Feds? Does having 15 guns instead of 5 really make you more successful in such a shootout?
I think this might be the wingnugget equivalent of “emotional eating.” Well … it’s probably a complement to emotional eating.
When my job goes away I’ll have to sell my guns to pay the bills anyway. Just sayin’
Even more telling is not addressing the reason these people want an AR-15. Do they want one just because it’s going to be banned? Obama is secretly planning to take your guns away? Uppity negroes are going to take your property and your women? Give me one explanation that is not self-induced hysteria.
I caint faht, but I kin leave sum vittles on the porch fuh ya TIDOS.
Obama is secretly planning to take your guns away?
Oh, well, see, Obama isn’t going to do that.
His seekrit masters in the U.N. will send the British Ghurkas to take our guns, accompanied by inner-city gangs guided, of course, by bar-code signs on the back of highway markers.
Spaceeba for, how do you say, “riling up the suckers”, tovarisch Bob.
The part that just cracks me up is the idea that you should stockpile a bunch of guns from your local gunshop in case Obama outlaws them.
If you buy guns from your local gunshop, Obama’s jackbooted thugs will know exactly where to go to confiscate them after the outlawing happens. Wouldn’t you be better off buying your weapons on the black market so the government won’t know you even have them?
Of course, that would mean you’d need to keep your mouth shut about having them in the first place. Since most conservatives appear to own guns solely so they can brag about having them, I guess the black market approach wouldn’t work so well for them.
Thanks for the “Red Dawn” link. I had no idea what that was all about, and I was starting to worry that all the wacked-out righties were Michigan fans.
Barack Obama isn’t going to take your guns away.
Barack Obama isn’t going to shove the Fairness Doctrine down your throat.
Your inability to address the actual things Obama supports is telling.
C’mon D.N., let’s not kick him when he’s down. The charcoal grill-sized tornado in his yard that stole his Precious…his continued inability to catch them dang Duke boys…and now a black President. It ain’t easy being Rosco P. Coltrane.
“We’ve secretly replaced their AK-47s with new Folger’s Decaffeinated. Let’s see if they can tell the difference…”
I hope the gun shops have thought to stock up on waterproof kits for those interested in burying their extra guns in the yard.
DIY kits for folks who want to build a hidden gun caches in their trailers would also be a hot item.
Paranoia = cha-ching$!$!
Customer request:
Each time you show the pic of Bob in the mall, you should add a new wingnut brandishing a weapon somewhere in the background.
I was starting to worry that all the wacked-out righties were Michigan fans.
However, all Michigan fans are wacked-out righties.
I kid, I kid. I’m that kind of Wolverine!
Wouldn’t you be better off buying your weapons on the
blackunwhite market so the government won’t know you even have them?Fixed yer post for political correctness.
I think we now have powerful evidence supporting Michael Moore’s thesis about guns in America– it’s about being scared of dem dar dark paypole. I mean, Bill Clinton’s views on guns weren’t much different than Obama’s, but did you see these runs in 1992?
Help, daydee, my tallywhacker fails short!! And mawmuh just smiled at duh maint-nunce main!
DIY kits for folks who want to build a hidden gun caches in their trailers would also be a hot item.
“Yes, well, you see, this is a special shovel designed specifically for digging caches in your back yard! Sure it costs five times what a regular shovel would, but would you want to take the risk?”
Do they want one just because it’s going to be banned?
No, and here’s the answer in two words: penis extensions.
Each time you show the pic of Bob in the mall, you should add a new wingnut brandishing a weapon somewhere in the background.
Seconded! I think I see a squash patch over by that potted tree …
Seconded! I think I see a squash patch over by that potted tree …
EW EW EW EW EW EW
DO NOT WAAAAAANT
I think it’s kind of funny that for the eight years most of these wing nuts have been yapping that Bush’s rapid erosion of the constitution, which included such hits as implementation of “free speech zones”, wireless wiretapping, torture, indefinite detention, useless transportation security, color-coded bescared-o-meters, and I-can-do-whatever-I-want-I’m-the-president legal theory among others, was perfectly justified and constituted no threat to civil society.
Then, a democrat was elected who said he would
ban all guns and consider their owners criminalsuphold the gun laws that are on the books already, and it’s all black helicopters and new world (socialist) order hysteria.– Bob “Confederate Yankee” Owens, October 31, 2008
Yes. Smaller, but yes.
Some people are buying them as investments, too. Assuming another Assault Weapons Ban is enacted with the same provisions as before, prices are going to go sky-high on ‘high capacity’ magazines as well as any banned weapons.
I feel sympathetic toward TiDoS Yankee. If McCain had been elected, I was scheduled to have two abortions and a gay wedding.
#1- A large cache of weapons “for protection” really helped those people in Waco.
#2- The dems don’t confiscated legally owned guns. That’s the province of a Republican federal govt. After Katrina, legally owned guns were confiscated by the national guard & local cops. More evidence of the fear-of-dark-people.
Check this out.
According to a Wall Street Journal column, our economic disaster is probably caused by saying “Happy Holidays” instead of “Merry Xmas”:
Mad Max and the Meltdown
It has been my view that the steady secularizing and insistent effort at dereligioning America has been dangerous. That danger flashed red in the fall into subprime personal behavior by borrowers and bankers, who after all are just people. Northerners and atheists who vilify Southern evangelicals are throwing out nurturers of useful virtue with the bathwater of obnoxious political opinions.
The point for a healthy society of commerce and politics is not that religion saves, but that it keeps most of the players inside the chalk lines. We are erasing the chalk lines.
Feel free: Banish Merry Christmas. Get ready for Mad Max.
Ask Me About My Penis
Indeed, America may never be ready to give up on our way of life for the miserable shackles of statism that he promises.
“Our way of life”: Entitlement to racism, guns, arrogance, intolerance and memories in simple minds of a simpler time that never existed.
The fact is, all sytems must operational and prepared for the exercise of our Constitutional Right.
Now, if the Founding Fathers wanted us ARMED against a Government that could go genocidal on us, did they really believe we were supposed to honor politicians in order to honor God?? Do Christians really understand that we are to view Marxist Socialist politicians, for example, as evil?? And protect ourselves?? Because they might try to kill us?? That’s what the Founding Fathers were MOST concerned about… because they knew history… and they did not exalt politicians or believe that honoring politicians in office was necessary to be a good Christian. They thought being armed against the Government so officials wouldn’t get all power hungry and turn murderuos… and having no trust in the Government… was being Christian.
🙂
I want a Check & Balance System because it’s one of the most effective deterrant against politicians acting like they’re God and deserve our worship and think they can take away our Constitution and our Rights… even to life.
Politicians are dangerous people that are most prone become very evil and dangerous when the people don’t have those Check & Balance Systems against a Government gone Socialist, for example, which is a Government System responsible for 100,000,000 murders of citizens of it’s own countries.
I pray my fellow citizens are armed to the hilt… and rise up to protect and defend the right to bear arms if this Government tries to take that right away. Because the next step by a Marxist would be genocide, imo, and Obama is a Marxist, imo, based on the facts.
What, is Bob Owens still going on about it being hard to find guns now that we have a fuzzy-haired President? I was hoping that the week after the election would be long enough for him to get over all this gun-go din.
…
I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have done that.
Somehow I don’t see you picketing extraordinary rendition or Guantanamo.
Oh, you said our Constitution. All evangelical whites being created equal & all.
I dunno. It’s got the misspellings one would expect, and the tortured grammatical structure. But the real Gary wouldn’t be so subtle with his irony and red herrings.
It’s got a good beat, easy to dance to….I’ll give it a 73. But I think it’s the Milli Vanilli version of Gary.
Gary, you’re a lazy thief.
Northerners and atheists who vilify Southern evangelicals are throwing out nurturers of useful virtue with the bathwater of obnoxious political opinions.
Useful virtue indeed! Why, just compare our divorce numbers to those of those godly people down south! Um, no, wait… teen pregnancy? Foreclosure rates, even? Crap.
I want a Check & Balance System because it’s one of the most effective deterrant against politicians acting like they’re God and deserve our worship and think they can take away our Constitution and our Rights…
Oh, NOW you want it. Unlike the last 8 years. Gee, wonder what changed?
In defense of the poor man chosen for your own reasons to view in humiliating self reflection , permit this thought . You must , Must , admit he has a crackerjack beeswax concern going on . Despite your obvious liberal thumb on the scales of justice , he passed on the clear observation that two birds were in there flitting about the bushmasters . By golly that werks out to two flighty types with intent to wreak transaction .
Not just wild talk but serious possible talk . Why if that were to happen again one hundred and ninety eight more times in fifty eight minutes that would prove just how balanced and sober the wild crazy talk is .
JEEBUS! Gun Shoppe Gomer lives in Fuquay?!?
I LIVE in Fuquay! That’s it, Maw. We’uns is a-movin’!
In defense of the poor man chosen for your own reasons to view in humiliating self reflection , permit this thought .
No thanks, we gave at the office, besides the little lady of the house isn’t in and we just paid the rent and we left our wallet in our other pants.
And stuff.
Do Christians really understand that we are to view Marxist Socialist politicians, for example, as evil??
You got a verse for that? ‘Cause I got a couple for you: Acts 2: 42-45 and Acts 4:32-37. Also, look at how colonial Plymouth was governed… OH NOES, PILGRIMS WUZ COMMUNISTS!
Hell, they think AR means assault rifle, fuck ’em, they’re stupid. In fact they probably think The White House means…eh, what am I saying…
The fact is, the 2nd amendment guarantees all the other ones. You liberals think otherwise which is why you suck and why you always fail.
Here in the Heartland, we are ready to push the reset button on the USA. The US has degenerated into Marxian Socialism, which has killed millions already.
America made the wrong decision, and as Dick Cheney said four years ago, make the wrong one, get hit again.
At least the terrorists will target eleite liberal coastal enclaves, not the Heartland.
Yah, only republicans blow up the heartland. We don’t need the terrorists encroaching on their domain.
At least the terrorists will target eleite liberal coastal enclaves, not the Heartland.
Like Tim McVeigh did?
Just caravan to Varina.
Those fancy big-city OKC children were all little red-diaper babies anyway.
And Eric Rudolph.
If only we could convince these poor crackers that Obama isn’t going to put them in camps and take their guns away. Maybe a mandatory reeducation program would ease their fears.
The purity is not just in intolerance , but in the mercy of intolerance .
The US has degenerated into Marxian Socialism, which has killed millions already.
Holy shite. Gary’s gone all anti-war, anti-Bush on us.
And The Order.
The fact is, OKC was an Al Quaida hit blamed on white CHrisitan patriots to try and devide America. It didn’t work.
The US has degenerated into Marxian Socialism
Well, that was fast.
The fact is, as soon as Obama got elected, USA has become just like USSR or Nazi Germany. No more freedom, rights except for black people, and free money for all of them killing free enterprise dead.
And all those Moozlims seen just before the bomb went off.
You’re really up on your OKC bombing ‘facts’. Too bad you didn’t live here in 1995. You could of saved them all.
The fact is, liberals, and their God Obama have ruined everything. Have sold out USA to terrorists, surrendered to illegal immigrants, held up the productive class and confiscate wealth gotten from hard work.
So… would this be a bad time to talk about my Hello Kitty AK-47?
What?
No more freedom, rights except for black people, and free money for all of them killing free enterprise dead.
Hey, I didn’t get any free money for my part in killing free enterprise! Ripoff! Ripoff!
Free money?
Sweet!!
What happened to the vintage, dry-finish Gary trollery? This stuff is rotgut.
You have to call yourself a bank.
And the Klan.
What happened to the vintage, dry-finish Gary trollery? This stuff is rotgut.
After a couple of
glassesposts you won’t even notice.Wow. We haven’t had a Garygasm in a while.
Oh, man, WTF are they smoking over at MSNBC.com?
Two of their featured stories – “Why everyone’s going to Wal-Mart” (’cause the economy sucks big wind and shopping at The Bad Place will save them 20 cents on a truck-sized package of toilet paper) and “Don’t Mistake Her For A Man” (thanks, guys, I wouldn’t have noticed if you hadn’t pointed it out).
And then there are those various and sundry neo-Nazi fucks from such effete, coastal enclaves as Aurora, CO and Bells, TN.
I just had the ACORN symbol tattooed on my arm.
And those abortion clinic bombers. Funny how they never seem to have the nerve to try that shit in NYC.
gun-go din
You’re a better man than I.
Now, if the Founding Fathers wanted us ARMED against a Government that could go genocidal on us, did they really believe we were supposed to honor politicians in order to honor God??
Does Jesus not say “render unto Caesar”? Does Jesus not tell us to “turn the other cheek”? Does God the Father not tell us “Vengeance is mine, you kids get off my lawn!”?
Did not Jesus say “Goddamnit, I hate trying to eat these fuckin’ M&Ms! They keep falling through the holes in my palms!”
And did not God point out to His Son that the Romans didn’t actually put crucifixion nails through palms but through wrists, and did not the Son respond with “Get bent, old man!”
I almost admire gun shop owners. They are making a mint off of pig-ignorant marks like teh Wankee. I’m not buying that supply of firearms is low. Guns are fucking everywhere. If I were an enterprising antitrust lawyer, I might want to look to see if there was a collusive effort of gun manufacturers and retailers to manufacture the belief that supply is low, so as to drive up the price.
Seriously, a gun manufacturer / supplier conspiracy is far more likely than the fever-sweats concocted by these dipshits.
> The fact is, liberals, and their God Obama have ruined everything. Have sold out USA to terrorists, surrendered to illegal immigrants, held up the productive class and confiscate wealth gotten from hard work.
Hussein X is indeed a mighty man. He isn’t even president yet and look at everything he’s done!
We are doomed! OH NOES.
I have dreams where I use my guns on those guys who made me the class target during dodgeball games back in 3rd grade.
Ah yes, Armalite rifle. So good… for doing laundry, carrying barbed wire…
Actually, they won the Cold War for us. Not because they’re good rifles, they’re not, but because they are significantly lighter than a Kalashnikov and, thus, our economy was not bankrupted by extending medical benefits to servicemen returning from long grueling tours of duty standing outside of consulates with chronic spinal ailments resulting from their slung rifles.
Pffft. Conservatives. Any right-thinking individual in this day and age would be packing something in a bullpup configuration. The FAMAS is the best mass produced assault rifle available, and get this… it’s FRENCH! BWAHAHAHAHA!
I’m kind of waiting for mikey to weigh in on all this gun-owners-are-nutjobs-and-inadequate jawing. It should be coming soon.
Really, be careful about painting with too broad a brush. The people stocking up on guns ’cause the scary black guy’s gonna come confus… konfis… take them away? Nutbars.
Gun owners as a whole? Not so much.
This has been another episode of Liberal Scolding For Fun and Profit.
Um, can somebody go over there and ask Bob just exactly HOW Obama’s going to “take their guns away”? I mean, while bush/cheney have proven that the president can violate and ignore certain parts of the constitution, it’s not like they legitimately passed legislation to abrogate those parts of the constitution – they just did what they did.
So President Obama and his henchmen are going to go door to door in every city, town and village, searching for and confiscating whatever they like in direct contravention of the 2nd amendment? Really?
It seems to me that if it was going to be that easy, the brady bill would not only have been unnecessary, it wouldn’t have been controversial…
mikey
Y’know, this lack of preview is disturbing…
And because they are completely incapable of grasping ‘abusive market practices’ when it doesn’t involve shifty nigger-loving Marxists, the manufacturers and suppliers would get away with it easy.
‘So what do you need to protect your home from Obama’s rampaging darkies?’
‘Oh, I don’t know. Don’t got a lot of money.’
‘How’s a glock sound, to start off?’
‘I guess. Sure was hoping for something bigger.’
‘We just got a bunch of real nice MAC-10s in. Just $6000.’
‘Whoa, shit! I guess just the glock then.’
‘OK, that’ll be $4500.’
‘Jesus. That’s a little much, don’t you think?’
‘My hands are tied, buddy. Obama, activist judges, the Jews…’
‘Yeah, yeah, I know. Christ on a pogo stick. You take home titles?’
Any thread that opens with a Dead Kennedys lyric is okay in my book.
Like I said before: many fatal gunshot wounds are self-inflicted … so perhaps we should be pitching in to help CY get MOAR yummy guns … it’s true that Darwin helps those who help themselves, but sometimes he needs a little help thinning the herd. Throw in a box of shells & a 40-pounder of Wild Turkey & let nature take its course.
Wingnuts: evolutionary also-rans, parked smack-dab under the meteorite of their own stupidity. Smells like iridium.
Wow, talk about powerful – if he’s that destructive now, just imagine how much more of a menace he’ll be in January, when he’s actually the President!
I think most of us know full well that Obama is a generic centrist – though hopefully less “Third Way” than Clinton was – & that many of his grand schemes are going to founder on the rocks of a cratering economy.
The wingnut-lovers in Teh Heartland can thank their hero Bush for pre-emptively neutralizing Obama’s diabolical plan to make America functional again – perhaps while they’re foraging for roots to boil or trying to decide which pet to eat first.
If we outlaw guns then only the children of outlaws will kill themselves in gun-accidents…
I don’t know what Bobo Wen’s point is. There’s a demand in America for guns? WOW!! Talk about a newsflash. Or does he think that the opinions of persons totally unrelated to Obama, his campaign, his transition teams, his potential administration, his past, his present, his future, who aren’t even “some guy in the neighbourhood” – somehow reflects on what Obama’s gonna do?
Congrats Bobo Wens, you found people who believe Obama’s gonna steal yer guns. You can also find folks who still think he’s an atheist muslim anti-christ. All this proves is that some people are stupid fucking morans.
Who is this Bush you speak of? All they remember is a brief period in which a doughty young relative of a past president stepped into the void left by Reagan’s passing to soothe a nation in mourning, and then things stopped being Clinton’s fault and started being then-Illinois-state-senator Obama’s fault.
“paranoia = cha-ching$!$!”
You know, as a liberal gun owner, I brought this up on a forum I frequent.
Under the Firearms section, someone was demanding people boycott Cheaper than Dirt because they had marked up their gun and ammo prices something like 500% since the election.
All these red-meat eating, uber-capitalist, freedom-lovin’, socialism-hatin’ real ‘Murkins were actually complaining that they were being “gouged” by the gun shops.
When I pointed out that it was a hilarious reversal of fortune for those who were claiming that Obama was “socialist” to then turn around and suddenly become opposed to the finest bedrock conservative tradition: unrestricted free-market capitalism. Also, I pointed out that Obama was probably the best thing that had ever happened to gun owners and retailers, as the value of their guns had just gone up.
Needless to say, much butthurt and lulz ensured, followed by an almost immediate deployment of the banhammer. It was a great success.
Well yeah but most of the founding fathers didn’t really think the Gospels were like the best plan for a government, what with the Enlightenment an all.
If a milquetoast like Barack X (PBUH) scares them this much, imagine what an actual liberal could do.
Seriously, a gun manufacturer / supplier conspiracy is far more likely than the fever-sweats concocted by these dipshits.
It’s possible, but these guys don’t want to buy “guns” in general. There are a few specific SKUs they want, and the manufacturing pipeline for them is probably based on a 3 month rolling forecast, so it’s likely that any sudden increase in demand would deplete supplies at the retail end.
OneMan, I’ve given up. There are people, otherwise intelligent who’s views for the most part coincide with mine, who feel the need to generalize and demonize ALL gun owners in order to continue to believe in the righteousness of their views. This seems to be a human trait, where having to believe that there are some gray areas, some nuance, some differentiation from your deeply held ideal and the real actual world is part and parcel of holding the beliefs in the first place.
Not worth arguing with them about…
mikey
“Where’d you kids get those guns from?”
“We got ’em by selling White Cloverline Brand Salve!”
I heard that the Preview function started a new career as a community organiser in Baltimore.
Um, can somebody go over there and ask Bob just exactly HOW Obama’s going to “take their guns away”?
A LARGE NEGRO WILL BE AT THEIR DOOR. They’ll do whatever he says.
Comparatively speaking, are they buying more guns NOW or did they buy more guns after 911?
Just wondering what loads their pants faster, is all.
One of the things that’s got the gun nuts in a lather is the fact that there’s an AWB floating around the House right now that is more broadly written than the previous ban, and , unlike the 1994 AWB, doesn’t contain a grandfather clause. The thinking is that no grandfather clause means seizure of weapons, like Australia or the UK did. And since Australia and the UK provide a precedent, well…
Not saying I agree with the logic – but that’s where it’s coming from.
For your consideration, Bobo Wen’s previous guns guns guns post:
The bolded in the original links to a pyjamasmedia rant he authored. His reasoning for “no good reason at all”?
OMG! Psychological testing for people who want concealed carry permits? Fucking beyond the pale man. There is no conceivable reason to prevent crazy psychopaths from wandering the streets with a concealed firearm.
CHICAGO COMPTROLLER RANDOM TYPINGS, esq. – Beaten by faulty logic, stabbed by bad spelling, poisoned by missing </close tags> and thrown out a thirteenth floor window by trolls or troll substitutes. His Preview was never found…
Also, a lot of the manufacturers are really small shops that can barely keep on top of their government contracts, never mind the civilian market. And when shops that normally move one or two AR lowers a month sells three dozen of them in a week… well… Supply and demand, baby.
It bears repeating: some of these buyers are speculating. I’ll admit to having recently ordered some items that I’d been intending to buy for a while and that I expect will become a lot harder to find in the not too distant future. While I was at the shop, there was a guy who was filling out the paperwork for twenty stripped AR lowers – with taxes and whatnot, he was dropping over $4000, and he was putting down an additional deposit for some twenty more.
He wasn’t hording – he was investing.
Not worth arguing with them about…
Perhaps you should just shoot them. Not to kill, just wing ’em or as a security guard at Ben Hill Griffith Stadium once told me “I’d just wang you”.
I got a question. I may’ve missed it because I’m not paying attention right now, but has gun control been an issue the Obama campaign and/or the transition group been spending a lot of time on? I mean, I’m not talking about in Bob Owens’ fevered imagination, but actual discussion about changing the status quo inre: regisration, ownership, etc. and so forth. It’s sorta like the Fairness Doctrine; the hind-brain knuckle-draggers have been screaming about the quashing of their First Amendment rights once Rush no longer has the only voice, but I really haven’t seen any ruffle on that stroke from the Obama people. They’re just looking at boring stuff like the economy and the war and whatnot.
I liked the 1975 version of AWB better.
I just think the world would be a safer place if we didn’t have an industrial and political cartel devoted to marketing dangerous, finicky tools as penis extensions for guys with ideological self-confidence issues.
Because when those guys are the primary market for that cartel’s products, it’s really easy for the debate to be framed around whether making buying a fully-automatic rifle off the shelf contingent on a clean bill of mental health is intolerable or worse than the Holocaust.
Where is everyone getting the money for these semi-automatic weapons? Google tells me they’re $1800-2500 a pop. If I were Mrs, Heartland and my hubby spent the Christmas money on a gun, I’d use it on him.
“Just wondering what loads their pants faster, is all.”
I see a “Jackass” bit in the future.
The idea, I believe, is to so thoroughly lower the discourse on any issue they feel vaguely important about that Obama would no sooner do anything serious with it than wade through an ocean of shit to shake hands with Jonah Goldberg. It’s preemptive, just the way they likes it.
And of course he isn’t doing anything with gun control. His situational position (more gun control is needed in DC, but probably not in Peoria) is more or less standard on the libertarian side of the gun question in big cities (the less libertarian being represented by good ol’ Rudy, whose answer was ‘fuck you, give them over’).
The wingnuts are simply going through a long list of things to shit themselves on cue over, so when Obama mentions one of them in passing they can go SEE? SEE? BLACK!!!
Does Michigan qualify as The Heartland?
Andrew Kehoe certainly qualifies as a terrorist.
” got a question. I may’ve missed it because I’m not paying attention right now, but has gun control been an issue the Obama campaign and/or the transition group been spending a lot of time on?”
They’ve said not a word. In fact, I recall Barack agreeing earlier this summer that the 2d amendment is an individual right.
But don’t you see? This makes it all the more insidious.
They don’t. It’s more or less an open secret that investment like Bobo Wens has in the gun culture requires you to be a real American, e.g. a fantastically rich man who still has strong opinions about fags.
Autos are a stupid wingnut status symbol, like a special Lamborghini that swerves to hit dusky people for you, has an extra-large cup-holder, barely hits freeway speed, and comes with a free year’s supply of Cheetos.
“OMG! Psychological testing for people who want concealed carry permits? Fucking beyond the pale man.”
Know what else is beyond the pale man? The Presidency.
@Susan: They don’t have to cost [NSFW]nearly that much.
(NSFW because yes, it links to an online gun shop, and I’m thinking that would probably come up cherries in filtering or monitoring software.)
So President Obama and his henchmen are going to go door to door in every city, town and village, searching for and confiscating whatever they like in direct contravention of the 2nd amendment? Really?
Aw, come on, Mikey! There’s a whole army of Jehovah’s Witnesses!
DragonKingWangChuck,
It’s worse than that, though: Hutchens is a Woo-man!!!1!
See, here’s the thing, though. I’m old enough to remember these fruit loops doing the exact same damn thing when Clinton took office. Matter of fact, I remember interviewing a gun seller for the local paper. Guy ran a feed store, and I know most of y’all ain’t got enough culture to full grasp the situation, but where I grew up, feed stores were basically malls for redneck dudes. You could get a Gibson or a Remington or a Bill Dance Tennessee baseball cap all in one store, a store you pretty much had to go to every week for actual critter feed. I got my first guitar at a feed store in Mooreville, and I went to school with guys who paid three figures for a spinning reel.
Anyhow, this guy ran a feed store and sold guns and he was put out about “that fag lover” Bill Clinton and his “slut wife” and “Bitch” Brady and so forth and so on. Now, at the time, I hunted regularly and spent more of my attention on guns than I do now. I was never an enthusiast, but I knew my hunting guns if nothing else. This feller was lit up, y’all, and I was scared he was going to shoot me. Also, when I wrote the story, my editor took out all his foul language and the guy got pissed off.
Difference is, we’ve basically got Obama’s every public moment recorded somewhere. You can look it up, he’s said sweet fuck-all about guns, wacky gun guy. You’re looking silly. Man, it just really boggles my mind. I’m not that smart, but even I got enough sense to doublecheck what I’m getting myself into a pants-wetting rage over.
I’m just wondering if that bump in gun prices is because of a SBM (Scary Black Man) elected President or because, you know, the economy is going to hell in a handbasket, and people are being threatened with foreclosure and are scared shitless, and figure it’s a way to beat back the sheriff?
In other words, did gun sales skyrocket on November 5 or September 16th, when McCain still held a two point lead over Obama and the day after he uttered those famous words “fundamentals are still strong”?
So what you’re saying is that we’re going to go into an economic panic with a paranoid citizenry raised on Rush Limbaugh hate radio and Chuck Norris movies, and armed to the teeth.
.
Matt T.
Feed stores in California in the ’50s were different from what you just described. The one we went to sold feed and that’s about all. Sometimes they had baby chicks for sale.
So what you’re saying is that we’re going to go into an economic panic with a paranoid citizenry raised on Rush Limbaugh hate radio and Chuck Norris movies, and armed to the teeth.
Um.
Yea.
….hadn’t looked at it that way.
Where’s my 30/30?
@Susan: Yeah, something like that.
One thing’s for sure, the gun ranges are LOADED with newbie assholes now who’ve never had a minute of instruction. I stopped at one last Saturday (yeah Mikey, I dragged my reloading supplies outta the storage bins they’d been hiding in and got my lazy ass in gear) for an hour’s shooting and had barely started when I noticed the guy next to me trying to clear a jam with his handgun aimed at my ribs!! “Sorry!! Sorry!! This is the first gun I’ve ever owned and I’m not clear on all the rules here!!” Holy shit…..I packed up and left, right quick. The place was packed with with people whose gun cases still had the price stickers on them, not a good sign.
opiejeanne,
Re: your Michigan is teh Heartland(tm) question,
I think we’re not counted, being as we’re half-Canadian. However, we do have all-American whackos, like Kehoe and James Wickstrom. Must be something in the water.
Orange Tom
I stopped going to my local range for the same reason. A guy in the lane next to me had his son (kid looked to be about 12) shooting an AK-47.
When it malfunctioned, the kid did the classic “Hey dad this thing’s jammed” and swung the muzzle right past me while I stood there with my best deer-caught-in-the-headlights look.
> Needless to say, much butthurt and lulz ensured, followed by an almost immediate deployment of the banhammer. It was a great success.
Reality strikes again!
I’ve been banned on several nutjob/wingnut/whackjob chatboards when I brought up un-refutable arguments and evidence. As always, wingnuts hate you messing with their little fantasyworlds.
Shorter Gary: I’m presenting like a motherfuckin’ mandrill here! RAPE ME HARDER!
You have my sympathy.
I live in California. In Orange County. Home of people like John Schmitz, who while not a terrorist was certain an All American Whacko, and he was the congressman here for a while. His behavior can not be blamed in any way on our proximity to Mexico… although, he was born in Milwaukee. Maybe we can blame Wisconsin.
held up the productive class and confiscate wealth gotten from hard work.
What do you do for a living, anyway? If that’s too subtle for you, I’ll just say outright that you won’t ever be affected by anything that targets the productive or wealthy. When they get around to holding up those who need to be reminded to breathe you may start worrying.
Sarcastro said,
November 20, 2008 at 21:14 (kill)
Ah yes, Armalite rifle.
I disapprove of it. So does Dave.
So, do we libruls need to arm ourselves against the wingnuts? It’s getting confusing.
An AK that malfunctioned? Whoa, what kinda crap was he shooting? At any rate, theres a series of serious accidents waiting to happen and the ranges are going to end up in a very expensive insurance situation.
(how are people doing the quote boxes? are they writing in a word proccessing program, then cutting and pasting?)
(how are people doing the quote boxes? are they writing in a word proccessing program, then cutting and pasting?)
Do this—
<blockquote>
quoted text goes here
</blockquote>
it will come out like this—
opiejane,
Well, you can get baby ducks in the feed stores back home, too. That was part of the circuit, mind: look at CB’s, look at guitars, look at cute baby farm animals, look at guns, look at knives, go home. And this was in the ’80s and ’90s, mind. Probably explains a lot.
I always screw up HTML tags (100% success rate!), so I just stopped trying. At least until I get more practice in. Maybe there’s a cheat sheet on teh Intertwebs or something. I second placing the blame on Wisconsin, BTW.
Orange Tom,
I was considering taking lessons in gun safety since I inheritied a couple of guns recently but I haven’t shot one in more than 30 years; one of the guns I own belonged to my great grandfather and I wouldn’t try firing it, but the other one is fairly decent and I think could be usable..
However, after reading your comments and the ones from Major Kong, and hearing a similar story from my husband’s employee who is a gun enthusiast (and a total wingnut), I think I may wait a bit.
I was considering taking lessons in gun safety since I inheritied a couple of guns recently but I haven’t shot one in more than 30 years;
For what it’s worth, you can find basic safety instruction via the NRA, available just about anywhere in the U.S. I may not buy their political line but the instruction’s pretty straightforward.
HTML codes!!!!
*smacks forehead*
Matt, my feed store experience was limited to the one where we bought our chicken feed and duck feed. It was in Los Angeles county, in a little town that was changing too quickly from semi-rural to acres of cheap tract housing on tiny lots. That was in the early 60s. We left in 1964.
You might want to have those guns looked at by a competent gunsmith before you try to shoot them.
Major Kong, yes. That’s what I planned to do. My dad is 90 and he was using the really old gun to plink crows in his garden in the 1980s. I didn’t know about it at the time or I’d have had a fit. He was in f@#$in’ Arcadia, firing away.
Tag manglers using Windows should investigate AutoHotkey. It executes scripts that are pretty easy to assemble.
Frinstance the line below, when replaced with triangular brackets, will generate blockquotes whenever I type “bq”.
:R:bq::[blockquote][/blockquote]
Those who repeat blocks of text a lot when typing should check it out.
It’s worse than that, though: Hutchens is a Woo-man!!!1!
At least she isn’t threatening to shrilly nag all the concealed carry permit holders until they surrender their guns. I mean the only thing worse than having your
manhoodfirearm taken away is the grating sound of a woman’s voice berating you for exercising your second amendment rights – amirite?Thanks for the hint, Righteous Bubba. My one-track mind runs on a dirt road; hence as I type I tend to forget what I was trying to say if I have to switch lanes to add tags or whatnot. I will check out autohotkey and see if it can help.
Feel free to e-mail for help.
There was also a Greasemonkey script or a Firefox add-on that was able to transform regular text boxes into the fancy word-processor type that you see at some other sites. I never was able to make it work but I ended up losing my Mozilla profile or something and never reinstalled it, so I didn’t try very hard.
Autohotkey can do a ton of very powerful things, live or time-delayed; it’s essentially a macro program that’ll work in every window, so my blockquote shortcut works system wide. If I was more ambitious I could get Autohotkey to recognize selected text and enclose it in tags.
I’m more of a lurker than a poster. Lately I’ve been more talkative, due to the wingnuts around here getting their freakout on. Getting into fights on the newspaper forums with hyperventilating morons. If nothing else, the Great Wingnut Meltdown will give me excellent HTML tag skillz by the time it’s all over. If it ever ends, that is.
Perhaps you should just shoot them. Not to kill, just wing ‘em or as a security guard at Ben Hill Griffith Stadium once told me “I’d just wang you”.
Yeah, because that sort of talk greatly inspires me to treat you as a sane, responsible gun owner and not an unhinged power-fantasy wacko gun nut.
*rolleyes*
> However, we do have all-American whackos, like Kehoe and James Wickstrom. Must be something in the water.
Don’t forget Robert Miles.
Michigan is full of hillbillies too. I’m amazed it usually votes blue, but the miles tractless wilderness full of KKK and Amway Inbreeds are more than offset by all those blackity blacks in Detroit/Flint/Saginaw, and all those Elitist Pinheads in E. Lansing and A-squared.
You rang?
funluvn
Oh, yea ….. I am in Cary, a I am pretty sure I have met and talked to the dude.
Also I like the way that Fuquay-Varina rolls of my tongue.
I srsly can’t get enuf of that photoshop and I keep hearing “Obamee’s comin’ t’git m’guns!” in my head.
My co-workers must think I’m insane from busting out laughing.
Hey, I tried my best to drag down society when I lived in A2. I finally realized the U students were doing a better job, so I left town.
I’m pretty lucky in that, living in the goddamn Mojave Desert, I don’t really need a range to go shooting. You just drive half an hour and you’re either in the desert or the suburbs.
Either way you’re all set, eh?
They like to put garden gnomes in their shit moats.
Hi, stogoe. I don’t believe we’ve met. Are you new here?
Blowing away garden gnomes… That would be several kinds of awesome.
Either way you’re all set, eh?
Watch the sarcasm, ps, or else stogoe (scoldy) mcscolderson might miss the joke and then yell at you over the internets.
Allow me to offer you one (1) clutch of pearls.
Please sanitize it when you’re finished…
mikey
FWIW, the ‘to protect us from tyranny’ argument implicitly suggests guns have as a major function or at least knock-on benefit the ability to conduct guerilla resistance against an oppressive state.
Bullshit.
You don’t conduct guerilla resistance with rifles, let alone fancy-ass ones that would need the kind of shop they don’t have in most states to fully repair. They might be of use – sometimes – but that’s not what wins a guerilla war for you.
As Dolan says, the basic prerequisite for winning a guerilla war is sitting down with your yearbook and family album and flipping a coupla coins for each head. If you’re prepared to not just cross those people out but bury their horrifyingly brutalized corpses, you could win a guerilla war with a pair of pliers and a sharp eye. If you aren’t, the best military weapons and training in the world wouldn’t help you – just ask the Boers.
There’s precious few ways to beat the Man, and shooting him in the foot isn’t one of them.
stogoe, maybe you should re-calibrate your sarcasm meter. Yours appears to be out of adjustment.
Goober Haiku:
AR-15 so-called
“assault weapons”
and standard
capacity magazines
as a security guard at Ben Hill Griffith Stadium once told me “I’d just wang you”.
You, uh, sure he was talking about guns?
The society is facing problems with such laws. This has to go legal and it’s
needed to be sorted at the earlier.