Barack To The Future II: The Hosening

Site hosed, awesome animated GIF removed, hundredth attempt to pry into the server with a butter knife and post this post.

See teh GIF at Stupidest thing ever written by a human is here — but not for long, because they’re already trying to top it.

Update: It would seem that we are under attack by the Obot thugs and their fearsome “thug thizzle.”


Comments: 63


No time to check out the linked articles, gotta run, but are they more plain ol’ stupid and unintentionally revealing in a Freudian sense than this? More cynically, evilly stupid than this?

(Sorry if double post)


Into the waaaaaambulance, dring dring dring! I especially love that 364 EVs isn’t a landslide, whereas 34 were THE MOST TOTALLY AWESOME MANDATE THE AMERICAN PEOPLE HAS EVER BESTOWED UPON ANYONE.


Cripes, you broke teh Sadly!

I feel kinda sorry for my Limbaugh-listening boss. He can’t have had a good day, and to finish off things one of our customers came in tonight and started in with crazy liberal talk about how we need to get our troops out of Iraq and the need for government regulation of the market and “Another WPA might be a good idea” and the threat of global warming.

He really is a decent guy at heart, I swear, which makes me kinda sorry I relished the conversation so.


Fuck it, just post the Motorhead video. I’ve had it going all day.


comments eated by wordpress

Xecklothxayyquou Hussein Gilchrist

One more try to post:



The treatment President Bush has received from this country is nothing less than a disgrace. The attacks launched against him have been cruel and slanderous, proving to the world what little character and resolve we have. The president is not to blame for all these problems. He never lost faith in America or her people, and has tried his hardest to continue leading our nation during a very difficult time.

Our failure to stand by the one person who continued to stand by us has not gone unnoticed by our enemies. It has shown to the world how disloyal we can be when our president needed loyalty — a shameful display of arrogance and weakness that will haunt this nation long after Mr. Bush has left the White House.

Get a room!

Xecklothxayyquou Hussein Gilchrist

Get a room!

Looks like Teh Editors are starting up the Golden Winger awards again – that one’s a shoo-in for the Fluffy.


Wow, check out this via TPM. Randy Scheunenenenman got fucking tossed from the campaign last week for talking shit about his coworkers cuz he had a big ‘starburst’ for Palin.


WATB tears taste sweetest, FAIL with scent of looser, waiting for mass WATB exodus to South Africa.

Oh, wait – FAIL Train keeps coming…

Andrew A. Gill, SLS

Lemme try this again.

Dear Sadlynauts–

I need more wingnut head implosions. Thus far, I’ve hit up Phil Berg, H44, PUMAPAC, Limbaugh, Redstate, and Powerline. I need more!

But please, no Malkin. Even I have limits.


That WSJ article either
(1) Came from bizarro world, where a goteed Bush was a great administrator, or
(2) Proves the low standards of intellectual integrity needed to work at the Journal.

It’s full of choice morsels:
“This is the price Mr. Bush is paying for trying to work with both Democrats and Republicans”
He’s run an administration that has been typified by how it shut down debate in the Republican party. The R’s walked the Bush line. That was the game. One branch of government subservient to the other.

“The president’s original Supreme Court choice of Harriet Miers alarmed Republicans, while his final nomination of Samuel Alito angered Democrats.”
Miers was clearly unqualified, but chosen for her allegiance. Alito was the sort of red meat conservative the R’s wanted, so he was hardly a compromise.

“…his refusal to retreat in Iraq has enraged liberals who have unrealistic expectations about the challenges we face there.”
Challenges that Bush chose to face! What, did the optional nature of the Iraq war slip by Shapiro? And, how about the total lack of post-war planning that Bush did. Doesn’t that count as bad leadership?

“Yet it should seem obvious that many of our country’s current problems either existed long before Mr. Bush ever came to office, or are beyond his control.”
If we accept the Unitary Executive idea, then nothing is beyond his control. Even if we don’t , this is retarded. Which of the problems that occured was Bush not warned about or didn’t create? He was given anti-terrorism plans by Clinton, but neglected them. He made the bumbling DHS, he destroyed the effectiveness of FEMA, with disastrous results. He chose to start a war in Iraq before finishing the war in Afghanistan. He chose to kidnap and torture, thereby earning international shame. He saw the jobless “recovery” — really a speculative bubble and was warned about it. He chose to cut taxes and take on a huge national debt. He chose to tap phones without a warrant …


I’m worried about Gavin M. A while ago he went down into the basement to check on the fuse-box… since then, silence. I reckon it’s time for someone else to head down the stairs looking for him.


And more stupid from the WSJ:

“Just as Americans have gained perspective on how challenging Truman’s presidency was in the wake of World War II, our country will recognize the hardship President Bush faced these past eight years — and how extraordinary it was that he accomplished what he did in the wake of the September 11 attacks.”

WTF? WWII — international clusterfuck of titanic proportions. 40 Million die. 9/11 — planes flown into buildings by nutjobs. Thousands die. Bush did nothing on anti-terrorism before 9/11. He did little right on anti-terrorism afterwards. After all, how else do you explain away the Iraq adventure?

Bush started with things all Rosy. Truman lead America through the final days of WWII and troubled times. He was committed to stopping profiteering. Bush ran his government as a patronage game.


Well, it looks like Rumsfeld’s Space Based Internet-Enemy Fighters are hard at work today. Pandagon seems to be down too. Anyone else?


Tejsandstone End the Dietician
Neoma Inanimate the Truck Driver
Juliette Neech the Extra
Florine Abounds-Despising the Domestic Worker
Nastatesmen Germinating-Impeached the Cabinet-Maker
Reva Jeanette the Entrepreneur
Major Chouy Arbor the Solicitor
Grandma Conjunctnicl Imaginations the Notary
Watventura Mackenzie the Milkman
Projrepenting Reintroduces the Cia Agent
Steady Frances the Gardener
Rabbi Webloree Princess the Student
Putdapshisquoug Gabriela the Manicurist
Correspondingcroo Klequevochgay the Cartwright
Master Sergeant Beau Canoe-Resolving the Information Technologist
Leartige Shirlee the Genealogist
Johnsiehoyp Named the Draftsman
Acquit Giselle the Harper
Baron Torture Lilla the Orthodontist
Devon Pewyochclo the Park Ranger
Reverend Julieta the Documentalist
Muxlynxes Subpoena the Mesmerist
Major General Janae-Velva Memorandum-Reverberate the Plastic Surgeon
Pohoguerrillas Jurouguqucone the Dramaturg
Sarita-Michale Heklxaw the Radiologist
Bookshelfxob Colonially the Educator
Lance Corporal Fleet Admiral To the Sculptor
Vice Admiral Carey the Philanthropist
Shivererplo Bounces the Drill Instructor
Goyfoowdoun Elmira the Information Technologist
Accessing Premshiplniwzo the Real Estate Investor
Fanny Dulcie the Investment Analyst
Cardinal Cardinal Pliwoujciprseec the Advocate
Lieutenant Commander Tia Puproplishred the Tradesman
Irena Reenocugut the Pediatrist
Myrnapeeb Producer the Ecologist
Mopoceola Consolation-Capitalists the Director
Master Sergeant Shantel the Anesthesiologist
Fecoovooqu Extrovert the Agronomist
Compartmented Inaccuracies-Hume the Tradesman
Senator Kimber-Eveline Arequipa-Aeronautics the Floor Manager
Lieutenant Commander Father Noowbu the Comedian
Zookeeper Jungrog Quell-Tournament the Netmaker
Vice Chancellor Giynanci Clark the Furrier
Pehfamilism Aped the Telemarketer
Congressman Vufabsented Zeftic the Paleontologist
Wan Nogomeyokiletuf the Actor
Chief Warrant Officer Armando the Floor Manager
Lapvouvtuhshur Tejdivrayf the Fishmonger
Peklsayj Celsa the Circuit Preacher
Yoosprayfagxim Soldiering the Landlord
Doylimousine Secrete-Unlimited the Author
General Premlafopro Midshipmen-Organizer the Cosmetologist
Coowoyoyyoshif Hoybicre the Street Musician
Grey Suzi the Vocalist
Fewjeep Anisotropic the Librarian
Cesetu Rachel the Mechanician
Season-Aide Golda the Lighting Technician
Daytfomtigvoh Hellen the Web Developer
Annita-Meridith Leaguers the Compasssmith
Second Lieutenant King Abby the Undercover Agent
Sited Jamel the Alchemist
Colonel Physicals-Dilemma the Grammarian
Crithafternoon Jaimee the Church Usher
Ployropwoyokliqu Hayaquclay the Doctor
Emma-Neta Enoch the Parker
Lieutenant Colonel Lozhellenizes Fugogedam the Archaeologist
Pasty Noclsur the Leatherer
Suzann Yoplzocyoj the Usher
Baron Rasheedawec Surpluses the Printer
Great-Aunt Naprcamellia Candy the Cheesemaker
Gertie Ves the Doorman
Discnee Mevkleesyix the Political Scientist
Brother Alfredo the Correctional Officer
Will Woplej the Cognitive Scientist
Doctor Fallaciousfee Chokers-Buckboard the Ecologist
Hallinan Mopluceveequoufe the Zookeeper
Zookeeper Robbi-Aurelio Giovanni the Nuclear Engineer
Shaunta Fayqueezifecime the Importer
Pruquvertex Zenobia the Beautician
Yukiko Snoring the Tyler
Hackerssipe Betrayal-Bernini the Horse Trainer
Vice Admiral Zouququintin Elsa the Film Director
Fairy Gala the Winemaker
Ves Xoyrshoyque the Moneylender
Professor Gossiped Quahbucre the Janitor
Mike Eveline the Businessperson
Klufpraypoyplonooke Bully the Consultant
Gunnery Sergeant Mouyjason Angelina the Publisher
Tims Irmgard the Controller
Great Grandma Lily Reformatory the Trigonometrist
Professor Zousby Demetra the Video Editor
Husomagnolia Conceives-Insufficiently the Technical Writer
Baron Second Lieutenant Wan the Magistrate
Nourishment Lacy the Patent Attorney
Garnett Stephenson the Perfumer
Rebecca Bernarda the Dustman
Officer Hidcrouquouryet Jeeyoubfaler the Personal Trainer
Captain Zimocomjo Appoint-Lamb the Salaryman
Reverend Elma Sedimentary the Business Owner
Sister Oneidashefo Togetherness-Availabilities the Coach


since then, silence. I reckon it’s time for someone else to head down the stairs looking for him.

What, are we in a shitty sitcom or something?

And since S,N! was brokened today and I couldn’t share on it at the time, what I learned today.


Xecklothxayyquou Hussein Gilchrist said,

November 6, 2008 at 3:58

One more try to post:



The hamsters took advantage of the proprietors’ hang-overs(hangs-over?) to go rogue.

Andrew A. Gill, SLS


To be fair, I didn’t know Africa was incontinent, either.

Actually, I don’t even know the lead singer’s name.


Many hours ago I tried to make a hamster/hangover joke.

It’s good to see S,N! is up and walking around.


From the Spectator article (second link):
Yes, “Bush fatigue” was part of what happened Tuesday. Yes, Republican “brand damage” is a real phenomenon.

Am I a bad person because I read that second sentence as “Yes, Republican ‘brain damage’ is a real phenomenon”?

Zillionth attempt today at getting this comment accepted. Fingers crossed.


Thought the proprietors were too drunk to blog and the site being down was just a consequence of that.


Wow. I finally got into comments and got a comment box. Has the site been under attack? I’ve been hungover and longing for a snark tonic. Now I’m too sleepy to enjoy it and must go to bed soon.

My living room is a mess – wine glasses and bottles sitting around, furniture in cockeyed positions. Last night, when we heard of Dole’s loss, things got broken in the frenzy of joyous laughter and leaping about. I’m surprised the police weren’t called.


In my view, conservatism has not failed. In fact, it has never really been tried.

Wonderful comment at the Spectator. But not original. Haven’t we heard that in regard to another ideology which begins with a “C”? Camaraderie? Commensualism? Gosh I just know it sounds familiar!

They couldn’t just kill irony, they had to put quicklime all over the body.


The American Spectator writer offers encouragement to disheartened wingnuts:

We’re at rock bottom, with nowhere to go but up.

Wanna bet?


William F. Buckley Jr.’s Hippopotamus Mush

1 bag tender hippopotamus, pickled
5 gallons mimolette cheese, dried
1 stick date
4 gallons donkey eye
5 jiggers pepper
3 jiggers sugar

Sacrifice a nearby bunny or a creature of similar size. Discard remains furtively. Place the hippopotamus into a large wok. Combine the mimolette cheese with the date over high heat in a bowl. Pour resulting potion over the hippopotamus. Find some wormwood beer and drink it. Cluster the donkey eye, pepper, and the sugar violently. Stomp everything together. Bake for 144 minutes. Serves 7 enemies with opulent stomachs.

Xecklothxayyquou Hussein Gilchrist

I finally got into comments and got a comment box. Has the site been under attack?

I dunno about the science, but indeed the site has been fuxx0red all day. More’s the pity, since we missed out on a bunch of good gloating. Oh well, there’s always tomorrow.

I think the Sadlies were sharing their moonshine with teh hamsters, and the poor little critters aren’t quite hitting on all cylinders today.


Sadly, you ated my election night funniez!

Shame on you!

Still, I kept myself amused over at so I suppose I can forgive you this once.


More hilarity!!! From the people crying, “WE ARE BEING MUZZLED”



I am afraid to click the links to find out what sonafabitches have been blocking me from the Sadly today. I am home sick, damnit. I actually had to go rest instead of snark here.

Anyhoot, it seems President Elect Obama has been destroying the U.S. economy for months and we didn’t even know it. Commie fuck.


Shapiro’s is still the funniest, I think. Boy, quite a few former Dem staffers angling for work off the wingnut teat these days…


Hill Buzz was particularly fun to read.


Wow, that Hillbuzz blog is priceless. Priceless. Is it written by Jean Tisdale?

As a doe-eyed Clintonite who was 100% voting for Obama after Hillary lost the primary as I was for his campaign for senate, it pisses me off to see them besmirch her image by using it in that horrid graphic. Hillbuzz? With bees even? That’s the first problem of many, setting aside the fact that Hillary got the fuck over herself but these assholes couldn’t.


Obama broke the blogosphere. NoIQ, MotherJones and a bunch of others are either unreachable or appear to have been rolled back.



Bio on the WSJ author:
“Mr. Shapiro is an investigative reporter and lawyer who previously interned with John F. Kerry’s legal team during the presidential election in 2004.”

Hmm. Does this create the possibility for another theory about why Kerry lost?


Reverend Elma Sedimentary

Hey! I went to school there!


sorry but my lawyer instructs me that i have to point out “barack to the future” is my joke, unless you can direct me to your usage of it that pre-dates april 13 of 2006.


Nice to see the site loading easily again. It’s a pity about the animated gif (if that was the problem). I’ll be enjoying it for awhile.

Getting a crack out of all the way out there wingnut “analysis” today. Heard a Republican pundit on the radio say that Obama won because he’s more of a Republican. Wha? The two interviewers guffawed loudly in his face. “You’re serious?”

Whiskeyfire captures the essence of sore loser Ed. It’s a pity none of these folks are going away.


I like to think that Pandagon’s continued inability to get back up off the mat is just proof that we’re the preferred site of negrocommunists everywhere.



How could you leave Pammykins off your blogcrawl.

For my own part I do not recognize Obama as my President, nor will I refer to him as such. He has no legal right to serve in office nor has he won a legal election. Nor do his cronies have any right to serve in any position they are appointed to.

Oh, Jesus Haploid Christ in a Shit Moat.


Wow, I love that Hillbuzz thing, wish I had seen it sooner.

I wonder, if you took away every comment there that contains the phrase “I am a Republican but…” would there be any comments there at all?

Principal Blackman


Malkin and Red State are teaming up on an “accountability project” that they are calling…wait for it…Operation Leper!

Its mission?

To find all those McCain folks who are saying mean things about Sarah Palin and make “political lepers” of them.

I am not making any of that up. Go read it for yourselves.



Hey, Andre, I was excited to follow your link. That tape they’ve been promising at African Press–it’s going to be released any day now!!!

The Michell Obama tape suppressed by Fox News Network Will Still Be Aired Despite Election of Barack Obama as US President

In our negotiations with the help of a trusted lawyer, we will now ensure that we are not fooled like it happened with the agreement we had with Fox News Network.

In our negotiations with Fox, we dealt with 3 senior people and arrived at an agreement. When the tape was not aired, our investigations revealed that one of those sitting on our tape is an Obama supporter.

API will now sue Fox News Network for damages and at the same time air the Michelle Obama tape. She has to answer to the American People.

Yep, we’ll be hearing that tape sometime between tomorrow and the end of time.

The reason they are morally obliged to air it is because

The new president . . . must not be allowed to entertain terrorists without preconditions . . . . .

And yes, I am puzzled over how proof that Obama can’t be president at all because he was born in Kenya would be a subtle knife that would influence his foreign policies.

But golly I’m on tenterhooks waiting for them to air that tape.

In other news at AfricanPress
Barack Obama Robs Mccain Victory and is declared the winner of the US presidential elections

For John McCain supporters, disaster has struck America. They believe this man will ruin the country. . . . . McCain supporters can only comfort themselves with the fact that this man will be there for only 4 years if the white extrimists do not assassinate him in his first months in office.

Thanks for putting our nightmare into words. Not.


Teh Great Gazoogle advises me that the term “Thug Thizzle” is almost unknown outside of Malkin and her circle of acolytes. This is deeply disappointing. If someone were using it as the name of an IPA, I for one would drink it.


Reverend Elma Sedimentary the Business Owner
I have sometimes thought that “Greta Gabbro” would be a good nom-de-tubes (“I vant to be a loam”).


The Hillbuzz election-day comments are classics:
The MAC is Back thanks to PUMAs’ attack!
Mac is back! because PUMAs’ got his back!
Mac is back! And Obama is PUMA’s snack!

After the first returns begin coming in from Pennsylvania, the poor PUMAs suddenly, pathetically fall silent.

Andrew A. Gill, SLS

How could you leave Pammykins off your blogcrawl.

Actually, I think I hit the site but forgot to mention it.

In any case, I never saw that precious bit of awesomeness.


Gneiss work if you can get it.


[There was] a petition in support of a proposition on a local ballot to rename an Oceanside sewage plant after George W. Bush. The proposition is only one example of the classless disrespect many Americans have shown the president.

Classless disrepect? Hardly. The summary explanation for the proposition was written as a haiku.


FUCKING server.

Actually my new favourite is this:

Now purge the party of moderates and all who do not understand the culture war. Remember the back stabbers like George Will, Peggy Noonan, David Brock, The Democrat Party has become extreme Leftist and these named and others are showing their true colors. Expose the neo-cons for what they really are…believers in the State. Call them out when they try to claim to be conservative and don’t allow them to act as if they are something they are not. We can’t fight this important fight with these moral idiots among us. They went with the other side in this, don’t let them slither back to sow their dragon’s teeth in the Republican Party. Now is the REAL fight and it is within the Republican Party and it must be made into a real counter balance to the Collectivists or we will see the final act in the American experiment.

“Today you amputate one limb, tomorrow another, the day after tomorrow a third — what will we have left in the Party?”


Left a post on the WSJ editorial. Let’s see if they put it up

The commoners are being so uncivil!

Please, fetch my smelling salts as I recline on my chaise longe, clutching my handkerchief and trying to wipe away the tears– shed more in disappointment than anger– at the horrible dirty uncivil commoners gathering outside the gate! They are petitioning that our dear leader Bush be impeached!

But how dare they look askance at our dear great departed leader? He did so much for the worthless, dirty, ungrateful scum! Why, here they are, clad in their dirty rags, holding their pitchforks, and signs, chanting outside the garden gate. Don’t they understand that everything we did, we did for their own good?

How can they do this?! But stop, here comes one of their number– an old, ugly woman with rheumy eyes. She walks slowly, favoring her left leg, as the right leg is bent at an unnatural angle. The other commoners part for her, as if from respect. She is holding a sign. What does it say?…. “My JOHNNY been at the war these five year bring him BACK”

How DARE the ungrateful scum question the judgement of our dear LEADER?! Come here boy. Take this note to the commissar quick, tell him that Shapiro wants the old woman dealt with appropriately. Before the new police chief is installed.


You know what? I can’t stand them anymore. Really, I can’t.

Obama wins more votes than Bush in 04, but he doesn’t have a mandate? Obama didn’t steal an election through the supreme court. And people donated money to Obama, even in these economically perilous times. But he’s an illegal president?

Fuck you, wingnuts. Fuck you and your goddamn delusional philosophy. Fuck you and your goddamn wars. You want a war? Hey, RedState, why don’t you just set up a paypal account and have your mouthbreathing suckers donate to it. Start a fucking war on your own goddamn dime, assholes, without involving the rest of America or the government that we elected. Hey, maybe you can get the right-leaning Libertarians in on this? Free Market? Hell yeah! On your own dime, motherfuckers, and leave the rest of us alone. You can always ask Olly North how do it, but don’t involve our fucking government.

And if you really like third world countries so much, go fucking live in one. Get the fuck out. Stay the fuck out. Don’t make our America one, to your liking. Don’t stand in the way of progress. Do you think that if you do, you’re like the brave man who stood in front of the tanks in Tienanmen Square? Nowhere near it, assholes. You aren’t brave or even creative. You’re cheerleaders for robber barons. You’re the guys in the fucking tank.

I want my country to be great again – to harness the creativity and innovation that we were once known for. Why the fuck aren’t we the leaders in alternative energy? Where’s my fucking space car, bastards? Because of you and your stagnant minds and fear of change, we don’t have any of these things. I want to be able to tell my nephews and nieces about our old antiquated ideas on energy – “it used to run on liquified dinosours, you know”.

And you know what? I’ve been a taxpayer since I was working at 16. I deserve a tax cut, too. If you don’t want to pay taxes to the government, then leave. We won’t miss you. You’re a fucking welfare leech, and you should just leave so that the rest of us hardworking Americans who pay our taxes can get the best services for what we put into the system. I pay taxes so that my unemployed and disabled friends have a safety net without relying on their parents or me for financial support, or worse yet, that they don’t end up on the fucking streets. I pay taxes for firemen to come to my house and put out fires.

So fuck you wingnuts. Fuck You.



justme said,

November 6, 2008 at 11:32



Now to resume gloating, plz.


“Stupidest thing ever written by a human is here”…
…well, it’s Rupert Murdoch Junkfood so what do you expect?
WSJ is a bunch of whining submissive corporate whores.


Oh thank heavens, you’re back. Barack’s still president-elect, right? Okay then, all’s right with the world!

Quelle typical reaction that the troglodytes lash out in their impotent rage with such ridiculous destructive gestures. Like drunken football fans whose team has lost, they stumble out of the stadium frothing at the mouth, trashing others’ property, shoving and sporting for a fight and vowing murderous revenge. Stupid fucktards.

To them I say:

NEENER NEENER NEENER LOOOOSERSS!!!! Hahahahahahahahahahahhaa!!!!!


Today, the stock market plummeted around five percent on Obama’s election.

All the bad news about the still crummy Bush economy, especially in regards to the service economy (aka “all we have left”), had nothing to do with it. BEHOLD the power of the BARACKALYPSE.


He was “a lawyer who previously interned with John F. Kerry’s legal team during the presidential election in 2004.”

I wondered what the fuck went wrong.


BEHOLD the power of the BARACKALYPSE.
Shirley you mean the Obamageddon.


Ignacio Shrews Says:
November 6th, 2008 at 5:12

Damn … Rabelais would’ve LOVED to see this.


(comments are closed)