Shorter Dr. Missus Ole Perfesser
Posted on October 16th, 2008 by Gavin M.
Ask Dr. Helen: Is It Time to ‘Go John Galt’?
As Ayn Rand foresaw, productive Americans are fed up with supporting the unproductive and may not take it anymore.
- So, an infantile, spite-driven attack on America — show of hands?
‘Shorter’ concept created by Daniel Davies and perfected by Elton Beard. We are aware of all Internet traditions.™
What is it, exactly, that Dr. Helen thinks she’s producing that makes her a useful member of society?
By the way, I’m the real Doctor Missus. That woman can find another title.
I sense that Gavin may have a useful computer.
Ron Paul will build an undersea city called Rapture!
(see Bioshock)
Nerds.
Alternate: The crazy readers of my crazy blog have a range of opinions that is crazy.
Why are there so many Megan McArdles? Were they on sale?
Also, I do not like looking at a picture of the Reynolds-Smiths having their weird robot sex.
…some who think they are “productive” might be in for a big surprise when they withdraw their “talents”
What is it, exactly, that Dr. Helen thinks she’s producing that makes her a useful member of society?
She makes knotheads feel better about themselves? Like the character in So Long And Thanks For All The Fish who tells rich people it’s okay to be rich. “No, no, honey, it’s all right to be a knuckle-dragging, mysoginist who can’t get a date because of Amanda Marcotte. No, really, it’s her fault.”
Something like that, I imagine.
Hey wingnuts.
President Obama is going to take a WHOLE BUNCH of our tax dollars, well, actually, more of YOUR tax dollars than ours, see, and give them to POOR people. You hear that? POOR people, many of whom have children, no jobs and in many cases are SICK.
Oh. Did I mention that many of these POOR people upon whom the Obama administration will shower this largess are BLACK? Oh yes. Black. Very, deeply black. Fo Shizzle.
And it is they who will have the money that you worked so hard for. Hee hee. Yes, and they will, on some occasions, buy forties with it. And Salem Cigarettes.
…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………
Man, that felt good. Shivers of schadenfreude running all up and down my spine.
I think I need a smoke…
mikey
Oh, please go. Louisiana needs your Galtian production of spittle. I suggest an encampment beside the Atchafalaya river where all the “productive” recipients of wingnut welfare can have ‘demselves a catfish fry and an Abita Turbodog as they fantasize about how the people driving by on I-10 a few miles away miss them.
Personally, I’m getting mighty weary of this “productive versus unproductive Americans” bullshit.
Losing my sense of humor, I guess.
That would be just the sort of thing that could restore my faith, so if you’re real, God, you’ll do this one little thing for me and make them go off and start their own society of truly “productive” people.
Oh Noes, Teh Werkers r goin all John Galt on mah ass.
4 Rednecks taking a day off sittin in the back of their pick-up each with a six-pack of Palin Ale in a cooler does not a revolution make.
Yeah, I think we can tell how this would turn out:
http://angryflower.com/atlass.gif
“Perhaps the partisan politics we are dealing with now is really just a struggle between those of us who believe in productivity, personal responsibility, and keeping government interference to a minimum…”
This, from a defender of The Idiot King and his administration? These people live in Wonderland. I know we say this, over and over, but it’s always a slight shock to see it confirmed. What would she say if you put it to her, “Where, exactly, in the behavior of your administration, over the past eight years, have you seen a single example of ‘personal responsibility’?”
Shorter me: Yes, by all means: go John Gault. Go on strike. Or just leave.
I urge that the wingnuts continue down the road of Objectivism. Objectivism, unlike most ideologies, has no give-and-take whatsoever — just take. It ENCOURAGES believers to eat their fellow believers, thus ensuring their population never rises above manageable numbers.
So, please, take this ball and run. Pretty please.
Oh Noes, Teh Werkers r goin all John Galt on mah ass.
…more likely the bankers – “Give us what we want or we’ll withdraw our talents.”
I think, for these folks, productive does not mean what they think it means.
I sense that Gavin may have a useful computer.
Alas, Bubba, it is still a borrowed computer, and the laptop remains in limbo.
We live in hope.
And that damn Hardy Heron just waddles on, unfazed by it all…
mikey
“Perhaps the partisan politics we are dealing with now is really just a struggle between those of us who believe in productivity, personal responsibility, and keeping government interference to a minimum…”
Well, that would mean that the soylent green of their fabulous new society would be fashioned out of rich folks, I’m guessing…oh, and when did these assholes go all anti-Gitmo, anti-Unitary Executive and pro-Posse Comitatus on us all of the sudden?
Cutting of the nose to spite the face.
The above can be found in the comments where supposedly sane individuals discuss working as little as possible because SUPER MARXIST SOCIALIST FASCIST OBAMA will tax them.
The mind boogles.
She should stop blogging.
That would sure teach us.
Mikey, here’s Swampland’s Mike Murphy snarling back:
If the snotty fucker is telling the truth, he sold his ass at the high. It’s going to be buyer’s market for rethuglican b.s. for years to come.
She has a point. Imagine if the entire Corner crew went on strike. We’d have to search, 3, maybe 4, city blocks before we found enough raving lunatics to take their place. Frankly, I have better things to do.
Viva La Revolution, bitches!
What is it, exactly, that Dr. Helen thinks she’s producing that makes her a useful member of society?
Y’all know she appears on that Oxygen show, Snapped? That sensational true-crime show about women who kill their husbands? That show that I watch sometimes and feel guilty about watching it?
Anyway, Dr. Helen pops up from time to time as the show’s designated psychological expert, explaining and analyzing the motives of these women she’s never met. I guess the producers figure her degree lends a patina of scientific credibility to the speculation and trite generalizations she spouts.
So, that’s one thing she produces.
Anyway, Dr. Helen pops up from time to time as the show’s designated psychological expert, explaining and analyzing the motives of these women she’s never met.
So, she makes shit up? Well, I guess that’s creating something, so chalk up a point for her.
a patina of scientific credibility
..a soupcon of self-awareness?
..a scintilla of cognition?
You can always depend on the Libertarian nuts to be entertaining.
The comments at the first link from the OP are hilarious!
Psychology classes can just copy them in toto for their chapter on Projection.
Sure, Doctor Missus! Just as soon as y’all Objecto-geniuses come up with the miraculous Galtian invisibility projector, and the perpetual energy generator, you’ll be all set. God knows the best thing to do with that kind of technology is go hide in a canyon somewhere and wait for society to colllapse due to your absence. That’ll work great!
Drop us a postcard from time to time, OK?
I get weirded out by the whole “productive vs. unproductive” and “switch to barter!” thing. Like, I’m planning on being a career research scientist (immunology, baby!) …how the hell do I barter that? Or is that not “productive”? Ooh, those terrible scientists, getting monies from the gubmint! I’m sure they do absolutely *nothing* for society! Clearly, the people I interned with last year spend 80-90 hours/week in the lab for their *own* health…
Seriously, though. The commenters over there are all assuming that the only reason anyone does *anything* work-esque is to make maximum money with minimum effort. ‘Cause, yeah, I could probably make way more per hour being a hooker or something than doing research, but I’m not exactly switching jobs here…
I imagine this goes for lots of people; *some* people do stuff just ’cause it needs to be done, right? Or even work because they like what they do? Or like helping people?
(And yeah, mikey, after reading your post I need a smoke too. ;D)
I picture the commenters at Dr. Helen’s blog as a roomful of guys ‘n’ gals
dressed like Devo, with short hair and “futuristic” flower pots for power-helmets, sagely exchanging theories about “man” and “society.” My favorite: those who find Ayn Rand’s work to be “flawed” but “powerful.”
Ooh, those terrible scientists, getting monies from the gubmint! I’m sure they do absolutely *nothing* for society!
Sadly, this is precisely what is seen by many as non-productive (especially if there aren’t clearly defined – by the “productive” ones – deliverables associated with the science). The good thing for you is that an immunologist may have more to barter than, say, a paleontologist.
Yeah, I think we can tell how this would turn out:
– thanks! I was going to try to track that down.
I’m seeing less of a “barter” and more of a “hostage situation” thing here… >D “So, how’s that cough doing, wingnuts?”
Wait, living off wingnut welfare is productive? Don’t most those right wing publishers lose money?
I think about the only thing productive that comes from the rightwing online community is that it keeps all the Confederate Yankees and Jonah’s of the world chained to a desk inside their houses. It severely lessens my chances of seeing them when I’m out and about, and for that, I am seriously thankful.
…eh, that’s gonna get used in court in my future I’m sure… *wince*
Not having read any Rand (I know, you’re all jealous) I don’t know if it’s just the moral depravity of the book or Dr. Helen’s poor reading skillz but is she really trying to say that the weak, the poor, the infirm, those afflicted with some sort of disability – that these folks are the “exploiters”?
…she’s trying not to say it (but imply it all the same)
In the real world, all these John Galt wannabes would never be missed.
Give me your tired, your poor,
Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free,
The wretched refuse of your teeming shore.
Send these, the homeless, tempest-tossed to me,
I will sell their organs to the highest bidder.
Y’all know she appears on that […] sensational true-crime show about women who kill their husbands?
That sends alarm-bells ringing.
The picture calls out for a title like “Invisible Cyberman costume”.
Like, I’m planning on being a career research scientist (immunology, baby!) …how the hell do I barter that? Or is that not “productive”?
It’s not completely useless, but face it, it’s not white-male-victimization blogging or TV psychotherapizing.
I picture the commenters at Dr. Helen’s blog as a roomful of guys ‘n’ gals dressed like Devo, with short hair and “futuristic” flower pots for power-helmets, sagely exchanging theories about “man” and “society.” My favorite: those who find Ayn Rand’s work to be “flawed” but “powerful.”
That is all kinds of awesome.
..a soupcon of self-awareness?
..a scintilla of cognition?
A veneer of veritas, if you will.
umm, isn’t her husband a State employee?
I suppose the phrase “cognitive dissonance” just has no meaning in winger land.
WTF?! Just read the wikipedia entry on John Galt:
I don’t know how many engineers there are in the audience here, but holy fucking shit. This is the equivalent of a doctor passing on helping the injured because… well just because. Fucking hell – engineering is a fucking PROFESSION -sack up you fucking pansy Galt-fairy. Imagine a catholic priest who tells a dying man “well -tough nougat, no absolution for you. Why? Just because.” Imagine a firefighter at the scene of an arson deciding, what the hell – this ain’t my house, let it burn. If I wrote that book, John fucking delicate flower Galt would get the ever loving crap kicked outta him. Asshole.
…no morning after pill for you
HAve you ever read any Ayn Rand? It’s written on about a sixth-grade level. I mean,it’s rally bad as literature, besides being incredibly heavy handed. Just the thing for wingnuts to admire as “great literature” In fact the wikipedia entry is too kind to Rand’s work.
No, by that do they mean that the Perfesser and the Missus are threatening to hide out in a camouflaged valley in the high rocky West and deprive us proles of the priceless nuggets of knowledge their superior intellects exude, or extrude, or whatever the verb is?
No, no, no, don’t go, anything but that! We lowly betas and gammas need you übermenschen! For
Karl Marx’sGod’s sake, think of the children, and don’t cut off our supply of Rearden Metal for the vitally necessary trans-continental rail-way tracks. Listen, we’ll make you creative titans a deal: you guys don’t pay any taxes any more – you shouldn’t, really, considering how bountifully you inspire and guide us from above – and we proles will gladly shoulder the entire burden of supporting the government, just as long as you don’t deny us your trans-human wisdom!!!No. wait a minute, let me rethink this.
No, actually, y’all go ahead and fuck off.
Oh yay please please PLEASE let all the people who think they are so productive and wonderful and creative and that the rest of us are a drag on their greatness just GO, and hole up in a valley or something, and then in a few months we can all go over and look at their emaciated corpses because all they knew how to do is pay actually intelligent people to invent things, that would be the BEST THING EVER.
So I guess the real question now is: what is the best way to convince these self-righteous dickheads that it is essential for them to fuck off into the wilderness and leave us the hell alone?
And conveniently gather them all in one place so we can fence it off as a federally-protected Ignorance Reserve.
Also that other guy is upset because he is expected to abide by the terms of the (very standard) contract, which he signed. OH NOES EVIL!
I think about the only thing productive that comes from the rightwing online community is that it keeps all the Confederate Yankees and Jonah’s of the world chained to a desk inside their houses. It severely lessens my chances of seeing them when I’m out and about, and for that, I am seriously thankful.
What did they do before the internet, write angry letters in green ink to the Daily Bugle?
HAve you ever read any Ayn Rand? Its not that badly written, and as thought exercise, its interesting. However, its self serving selfishness is pretty disgusting. What the Rand fanboys don’t ever seem to understand is that her complaints could also be applied to rightist regimes, as well as socialist ones. But that would be too complicated, i suppose.
Anyway, grown up writers on totalitarian systems; Orwell, bitches…
As regards “productive”, the acid test is – “if this person disappeared tomorrow, would society be worse off?”. I’m a librarian, I do something useful. Helen Smith is “a psychologist specializing in forensic issues” which, I assume, means she gets paid to say “this person is not crazy” or “this person is crazy” in court by either side. Not going to be missed.
But I have to admit, she has a point. I can’t understand why America doesn’t just cut the welfare queens off completely…
Rand is awful. Characters don’t actually have any dialog, they open their mouths and emit “philosophical positions.”
Oh, god, yes.
Libertarian communes.
I just hope they can be convinced to install webcams so we can watch them die.
Aren’t all those CEOs with the Golden Hang-gliders and 100 million dollar haircuts the kind of “productive” geniuses we’re talking about here?
And isn’t everybody calling for their heads?
I’m pretty sure that dropping out of society to cleave to the land would mess with your tenure at a public university which would cease to exist anyway.
I’m also pretty sure that when the folks who feed the hamsters at Paypal die of tunnel-related carbon monoxide poisoning the Reynolds family is going to feel it a bit.
My favorite is that the so-called supermensch can’t live without their high blood pressure medicine or their anti-depressants or their bladder-inhibitors (!) or their restless peg medicine. All of these are survivable ailements, but will reduce your quality of life. Or howsa about “pain management medication”?
That’s right. Soon, I will revoke all of your pie-filter privileges. I withdraw my greasemonkey script!
…do you really mean “restless peg”? Is this the Long John Silver version of “restless leg” (the mental image is compelling!!)
I always thought Rand was teh funnay because I could never picture a group of libertarian “producers” who would: a) be able to do anything as a group for more than about five minutes at a time and b) amount to a large enough number to make any difference at all.
Never mind the overwrought prose, evidently aimed at precocious 12 year olds.
I too would love, love, love to see the most Randian “producers” haul their Buttocks to…I dunno, Russia or Somalia or some other libertarian dream location. Don’t let the door hit you on the way out, boys!
Give me your tired, your poor,
Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free,
The wretched refuse of your teeming shore.
Send these, the homeless, tempest-tossed to me,
I will sell their organs to the highest bidder.
Complete brilliance. Even made my hard-to-impress wife laugh.
Let’s see, professor at third-tier law school/blogger, psychologist/consultant/blogger, withdrawing their talents….
Visualizing pulling finger out of bucket of water.
Ah, the wholesome family joy of electro-convulsive therapy. All that cognitive dissonance magically wiped away at the pull of a lever!
For once I agree with a Libertarian. I’m all for people who inexplicably get paid to bloviate their juvenile political and social opinions to “withdraw their talents.”
Convince them that liberals would prefer it if they didn’t fuck off into the wilderness and leave us the hell alone.
Ayn Rand was all about the greed, and to that extent, she had a point, but…
Rand never took into account that people strive to be better than she wanted them to be.
The only thing she produces is hot air from every one of her orifices.
I think a Randian is what you get when you combine the contempt and massive sense of entitlement of a John McCain with the philosophical skills of your average lemming.
Why does the phrase “B Ark” keep bouncing around my cranium right now?
…a scintilla of cognition?
A quarter of a scintilla at the most, or I’m Joke the Plumber.
“Stopping the motor of the world?”
What, they mean the EU?
Oh wait, they might mean the financial motor. Britain, then?
Or I guess they could mean the most productive country. China?
I guess they could mean the place that supplies the energy; the fuel tank, if you will, rather than the engine. So they mean the monarchies and theocracies of the middle east?
Though maybe they’re looking forward, and thinking about Uranium – I mean if nuclear is the energy of the future. So that would mean the places with all the Uranium – Australia, then?
These people talk about leaving the US – where would they go? Amongst western nations, the only place that believes that ‘government is the problem’ bullshit is the US. And they’re the ones who are heading – and dragging the rest of us – into recession.
What, the US isn’t an accurate measure of what objectivism would really be like, if someone tried it properly? Go sit over there with the communists and bitch about it to them, because a government that hasn’t been done right yet is probably a government that won’t ever be done right.
slightly_peeved:
In the book, they have a retreat somewhere in Colorado. I read not just “Atlas Shrugged” but also “Fountainhead” & many of her short stories until I realized what a horrible writer and human being she was. A miserable, miserable philosophy.
Back when I had time for such foolishness, I read Rand’s novels several times. They’re a parade blank-eyed automatons belching forth philosophical postures and carefully stacking the deck in as blatant a way as possible. They might as well say, “Are we not robots? If you prick us, do we not make a speech?” There was something about them I found entertaining, but the holes in the plot and underlying world view get bigger the more you look at them.
I read that Wikipedia entry (Wikipedia was founded by a fan of hers) and followed the link to the Modern Library reader poll that puts all her novels in the top ten for the 20th century, accompanied by Battlefield Earth. Did I mention that the poll allowed repeat voting?
Atlas offers the best framework for mockery, but I’d rather read it again twice than revisit Anthem. That stinker was just gaseous pretension floating in a framework of concentrated inanity that makes DUCK AMUCK look like a model of sanity.
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