Could it be because she needs a belt to hold up her breasts?

Over at Townhall’s blog, Ryan writes:

Suddenly the fabulous Michelle Malkin came by to surprise the group. […] I’ve never seen so many smiles and cameras appear so fast. Ms. Malkin clearly enjoys a bit of celebrity status among the bloggers at CPAC.

If you’re wondering how it is that a woman who looks like this and that enjoys celebrity status, you might need to know that the bloggers look like this guy and that other guy.


Comments: 35


I wonder if some twisted wingnut has written some “Wingnut Slash fiction,” complete with Malkin-Coulter lesbian scenes… In fact, I’m SURE some demented prick has done it, but I don’t have the stones to Google it…


Amusing idea.

I’m tempted to write something myself, but would have to take a loooong shower afterwards for all the wrong reasons…


Further down is an article blaming lesbianism on the parents. The marriage of two “broken people” creates a dysfunctional family that leads to lesbianism. You know, like Lynne and Dick. Or Mr. and Mrs. Keyes.

Will they ever confront the contradiction? Sadly, no!


What is up with the boob-belt?? And pink and brown together? Yucky.


An hour after those pictures were taken, a drunken Michelle Malkin was seen at the no-host bar, imploring passersby to, “Intern me!”


Suddenly the fabulous Michelle Malkin came by to surprise the group. […] I’ve never seen so many smiles and cameras appear so fast. Ms. Malkin clearly enjoys a bit of celebrity status among the bloggers at CPAC.

Boy, my gay-dar is off the scale with that remark. Fabulous? No hetero male is allowed to use that term. It was a UN resolution (…and one the US didn’t veto).

My theory is: these guys are all closet cases and salivate over shrewish mediocrities like Malkin because they are feigning attraction to the opposite sex.


Holding up WHAT breasts?? (Meow)


Are you sure those guys aren’t software developers? They are rather pale.


I nearly ran out of the room screaming. Them are all the real ‘them’ aren’t they? No distorting trick mirrors were used, huh? Good gawdz!

Some of the scarier Malkin picts are really the freeze shots of Malkin when she appeared on Chris Mathews Hardball for her book promotion. Mathews swatted at her and she really came out from behind her makeup. I swear she looked possesed. Here she looks drunk and maybe even a tad bit languorous. I wonder which ones and how many got her. They are so pasty and pale and look like they prefer sex in a dark closet prefaced with some glue or cleaning fluid sniffing. Pfht is their duration…


She looks a lot cuter in the picture on her blog. Which sucks. All her blog is “unborn child” “Jesus!” “go Bush rah rah.”

There are some right wing bloggers who sometimes have something interesting to say.

Some people think I look cute, so you could visit my blog which is a lot more deserving of traffic than Malkin’s blog.


I’ve got headphones, that jingle jangle jingle


Seb, you’re linking skillz have let you down on this one. The first guy isn’t bad at all, he needs to let his hair grow out a little so that it frames his face and the second guy is sort of handsome. Surely there were some Adam Yoshida look-alikes that you could have picked? I’d do both the guys you linked to, though, of course, they’d have to agree not to talk at all.


Pull down pants so that I may see your breasts! Oh, she’s wearing a dress. Nevermind.

Seb, couldnt you find dorkier wingnuts? Come on, you find dorky commie abortion-enthusiasts all the time (you link to me, after all). Whither the retarded wingnuts? Remember when you posted David Adesnik’s photo? Good times.

Wingnut slash fiction has been done at TBogg’s, and neocon slash fiction has been done, hilariously, at Richard Perle’s Musings (which was the last post, ever, there; apparently Dick shot his wad, as it were!).

I have a theory on the boob belt. Observe the imperious Broomhilda lady to the left of Malkin in the first photo. Plainly there was a leash in the original picture which was photoshopped out. Maybe a riding crop, too. Thus Malkin’s theories on internment take on added dimensions and inspire re-readings in the same way Judas Priest lyrics did when Halford came out. Or Foucault’s theories of power after.. you know. Except Rob’s and Michel’s work is enriched by this, where Michelle’s will always be useless.


Damn Abigail is cute and not at all insane looking.


Thanks merlallen 🙂

But I’m not sure I get the “insane” reference.


1. Abigail is cute enough that I’m beginning to regard myself as unhappily married.

2. In defense of Michelle Malkin, she apparently had the flu, so was not looking her best. That aside, she’s a psychotic lying fascist bitch that works as a fluffer for right wing lunacy.


Abigail’s a darling. She’s awakening my vestigial heterosexuality here as I speak..yes…yes…yes…oh, darn…sadly, no.

Still, Abigail. You’re cute. And not a wingnut. Please don’t change.


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Most women seem to find that a bra holds up their breasts reasonably well. It is indeed odd that the concentration-camp queen, who appears to be pretty flat-chested, evidently needs a belt as well.


You guys are such sweeties, thanks for the nice comments.


You’re welcome, Abigail. By insane I meant unreasonable wingnut. I had to click the link for a second look. Yes, still a babe.


I agree that Abigail is very cute, and is only slightly insane looking, which isn’t a bad thing. She also spells her name correctly, unlike my sister-in-law, who named my niece Abbigale. Poor thing will never find her name on a keychain.


OMG! I think I knew her mother in the PI. 5’1″, brown hair, brown eyes and she promised to love me long time.

-Whew- glad I took a pass.

[Comment left in someone else’s name — troll’s alias deleted. -S,N!]


I?m with Jim. I?d love to tap both of those wingnut boys.


Ew. “Conservative and Single- Looking for Ms. Right!”

Uh, I think that guy would be delighted just to find Ms. Right Now.

I finally put a teeny picture of myself on my blog, way down at the bottom of my sidebar- and yeah, I’m probably marginally cuter than Malkin. And not insane looking like Peggy Noonan. And I don’t have an Adam’s Apple like Coulter.


I finally put a teeny picture of myself on my blog, way down at the bottom of my sidebar- and yeah, I’m probably marginally cuter than Malkin

Damn, you are ugly!

Oh wait, my bad, that’s a picture of the ‘Liberace of Baghdad’. You had me worried there for a moment. 🙂


And for the record, you are cuter than Malkin, not nearly as insane looking as Noonan, but I’m just going to have to take your word for it on the adam’s apple.


He he. Poor Samir. Time has not treated him well.


It gets worse, too. (blogwhore alert)

Ain’t she beautiful? Michelle Malkin is the face — and the media model — of the future.

I’m guessing the blogger who wrote that hasn’t seen these CPAC pictures yet.


Damn Abigail is cute and not at all insane looking.

Sorry to interrupt but this is Sadly, No!, not! (Though Abigail is cute.)


Yikes, Auguste . . . just . . . yikes.

Do you think she has any minority friends? It’s gotta be weird, she’s like the black white supremacist on Chapelle’s show.


Guys check this site

If you are not familiar with the concept, you send your picture to the site and visitor rate you from 1 (not so cute) to 10 (very cute). It is fun. You can leave comments on the pictures and even contact the person so there could be also a potential date.

Feel free to put your picture there and have fun.


In the arena of ideas and our focus is on how people look? Seriously?


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