Shorter Michelle Malkin
Posted on October 8th, 2008 by Travis G.
Above: The author of Unhinged: Exposing Liberals Gone Wild
- Poor black people are taking away your right to vote.
‘Shorter’ concept created by Daniel Davies and perfected by Elton Beard. We are aware of all Internet traditions.™
Poor, poor Michelle. A black guy’s gonna be President of Whiteytown.
It’s a bit amusing that Malkin, of all people, is complaining about thugs. I mean, how are the bets running on how quickly after the inauguration that she’s gonna start openly advocating assassination? Fifteen seconds or less?
That one video really showed her off well.
Only 31 comments in:
Subject: Ranger29
….
Remember it is conservatives who own most of the guns and know how to shoot. If obama gets elected and tries to eliminate the right to freedom of speech for conservatives, We are not going to take that without a fight – quite possibly a very literal fight if things get too bad under obama. It would be liberals who bring a knife to a gun fight.
*************
These people are a collective menace.
No way I’m clicking on a Malkin link, but just what in the hell is a “thug thizzle”?
Clearly someone needs to be interned in a camp.
It’s your thizzle
Do what you wanna dizzle
I would love to watch these pissants take on an FBI or ATF office.
Alas, considering what abject cowards they are, rather than take their pissy little guns and ammo fantasies to the people who would, without doubt, be central to their paranoid dreams of being taken forcefully by G-men, instead they will target IRS buildings, VA centers, and other government agencies that y’know, aren’t packing.
Like their buddies McVeigh and whatshisface, that targeted a federal day-care center. To show what kind of men they were.
And then when the ATF does come and sets them on fire, they’ll piss and moan and make martyrs out of their vicious little sociopathic brethren. And oh, how the liberals have decayed truth and justice in America, and blah blah, hopeless persecution fantasy, blah blah blah.
Um, this?
“Thug thizzle” means doing one’s thang. However, because black people say it, it ACTUALLY means “kill whitey”.
I can’t tizzle ya
who to sizzle it to
I suck.
The righties’ creation of ACORN as a fetish enemy is yet another of the weirdest enemy fixations of the right.
Did you hear about how ACORN is personally responsible for the current credit crisis, the JFK assassination, and 9/11? It’s amazing how dangerous all those improverished inner-city blacks can be when they organize their communities.
As the possibility of a BLACK PRESIDENT!!!!!!11!11
named BARRACK HUSSEIN!!!1! OBAMA!!!!@!!!!11!!!! becomes more and more real, they’re totally losing it. This will not be pretty. In fact it’s going to get pretty scary.
These people are a collective menace.
Absolutely.
When Obama gets into office, he really needs to order the FBI and Secret Service to start watching the freepers and Malkin’s pro-terror minions. (Anyone think they’re being watched now? Anyone? Hell, I think Obama’s Secret Service detail is more likely to take a shot at him than the freepers are) I suspect a serious investigation would only take a day or two to get enough evidence to throw 90% of Malkin’s readers into Gitmo for the rest of their lives.
Do you think Malkin and the rest of her freaks ever consider what happened the last time Republican extremists had a really big terrorist success? Do they remember what happened to the militias when McVeigh bombed the Murrah building? Have they considered how rapidly and how violently public opinion would turn against them if one of their thugs take a shot at Obama?
It appears that this piece of glowing wit by the Malkinator has been removed. At least I can’t find the text portion of the article, although the headline is more than enough to tell me what she is saying.
(“did I mention he’s BLACK”)
What’s especially scary, Legalize, is that conservatives view anything, including stop signs and cumulonimbus clouds, as direct attacks on their freedom of speech. Also a weak grasp of the english language and grammar.
What will be fun is, round about January 25th if not sooner, the right wing blogs are going to start going on about the G_DDAMN GUM’MENT and their un-American laws about warrentless searches and wiretaps. Goddamn big-gum’ment lib’ruls.
I second what MzNickey said. The october surprise is going to come in the form of some crazy domestic terrorism (and not the kind where some hippies liberate a farm full of weasels so they can’t be turned into Cindy McCain’s fur collar)
When Obama gets in, the important thing is going to be identifying all the right wing Klan/Milita/christianist theocratic sympathisers in government and law enforcement, and kicking them out of power.
Domestic terrorists have always been largely ignored and allowed to get on with bombing planned parenthood etc in peace. Simply because they are white, Christian, right wing, and have essentially the same political aims as the republican base. They have far too many wingnuts turning a blind eye to them, or otherwise supporting their goals.
Word, Some Guy. Malkin’s post about ACORN is simply setting the stage for winger whining about persecution for the next 4 years. I’m sure the Clintons will still come up from time to time, but the mean poor blacks at ACORN and Freddie and Fanny, who forced proper white Americans to blah blah blah, are the REAL villains.
> not the kind where some hippies liberate a farm full of weasels so they can’t be turned into Cindy McCain’s fur collar
Thanks, hippies!
I’ve just closed my eyes again
Climbed aboard the dreamweasel train
Driver take away my worries of today
And leave tomorrow behind
Dreamweasel I belive you can get me trough the night
Dreamweasel I belive we can reach the morning light
Obama’s political DNA is encoded with the ACORN agenda
The stupid diseased cunt can’t even use a correct metaphor.
The Dreamweasels, they live inside of my head.
The Dreamweasels, they come to me in my bed.
The Dreamweasels, they’re coming to arrest me, oh no.
You know that talk is cheap, and those rumors ain’t nice.
And when I fall asleep I don’t think I’ll survive the night, the night.
‘Cause they’re waiting for me.
They’re looking for me.
Ev’ry single night they’re driving me insane.
Those men inside my brain.
The Dreamweasels, they live inside of my head.
(Live inside of my head.)
The Dreamweasels, they come to me in my bed.
(Come to me in my bed.)
The Dreamweasels, they’re coming to arrest me, oh no.
Well, I can’t tell lies, ’cause they’re listening to me.
And when I fall asleep, bet they’re spying on me tonight, tonight.
‘Cause they’re waiting for me.
They’re looking for me.
Ev’ry single night they’re driving me insane.
Those men inside my brain.
I try to sleep, they’re wide awake, they won’t let me alone.
They don’t get paid or take vacations, or let me alone.
They spy on me, I try to hide, they won’t let me alone.
They persecute me, they’re the judge and jury all in one.
‘Cause they’re waiting for me.
They’re looking for me.
Ev’ry single night they’re driving me insane.
Those men inside my brain.
The Dreamweasels, they live inside of my head.
The Dreamweasels, they come to me in my bed.
The Dreamweasels, they’re coming to arrest me.
Dear Ms. Malkin,
Melanin content of your skin aside, if you’re going to persist in sounding whiter than someone who has a hard time mustering freckles, please refrain from attempting to speak “street.”
Thanks for your kind attention to this urgent matter.
Sincerely,
Slang Maledict,
Vernacular Preservation Society of America
You’ve all forgotten the CRA, ground zero for wingnut blame in the housing mess. Facts, of course, don’t enter into their thinking, so the fact that these loans are held on the books at their respective banks to prove they weren’t redlining (depository institutions are the only ones held to the CRA, none of the other financial institutions who lent wildly were subject to it) and which are actually performing loans means nothing to them. It’s all “I told you if we gave the darkies houses that they’d rob us blind!!”. Wingnut logic, the latest oxymoron. They’d attack Habitat for Humanity if it was bigger. Hatred is the virus in the wingnut blood that courses through them in ever increasing amounts.
And if that’s not loving me, then all i’ve got to say,
God didn’t make the little Dreamweasels, and it don’t rain in indianapolis in the summer time.
And there’s no such thing as dr. seuss or disney land and mother goose, no nursery rhymes.
God didn’t make the little Dreamweasels, and it don’t rain in indianapolis in the summer time.
And when myself is feeling low, i think about her face and go and ease my mind.
Acorns are fetal oak trees, so hating them makes one pro-oak-abortion. SHAMEFUL.
It appears Ms Malkin is indignant that people she considers unqualified to vote will turn out to vote. You know, like the homeless! The very people who are subhuman because they don’t own or rent homes? She actually uses the term “quantity, not quality.”
When you’re alone
And life is making you lonely,
You can always go to the Dreamweasels
When you’ve got worries,
All the noise and the hurry
Seems to help, I know, Dreamweasels
Just listen to the music of the traffic in the city
Linger on the sidewalk where the neon signs are pretty
How can you lose?
The lights are much brighter there
You can forget all your troubles, forget all your cares and go
Dreamweasels, things’ll be great when you’re
Dreamweasels, no finer place for sure,
Dreamweasels, everything’s waiting for you
(Dreamweasels)
We are young, we are free on earth together. Let’s fall in love.
You are fine, you are white, I am of color. Let’s fall in love.
Nice Dreamweasels in the summertime.
Nice Dreamweasels in the summer.
I want you, you want me, we want each other. Is that so wrong?
It’s raining. Mad sisters, why can’t they realize, that it won’t be long?
We’re all nice Dreamweasels in the summertime.
Nice Dreamweasels in the summer.
Dreamweasel, where are you?
With a love, oh so true
And a paw that I can hold
To feel you near as I grow old
Because I want (yeah, yeah, yeah)
A stoat (yeah, yeah, yeah)
To call (yeah, yeah, yeah)
My own (yeah, yeah)
I want a dreamweasel
So I don’t have to dream alone
The SS is a wierd mix of gun jockeys and computer geeks. I almost feel sorry for any fRightened Keyboardist who is talking revolution should Obama do something they perceive as a threat (like smile or look at their women through the TV).
I suspect I’m going to spend a lot of time reminding myself that domestic spying is wrong, no matter who gets dragged off for a prolonged chat with guys who have no sense of humor.
Of course, they were all for it when they simply disagreed with the people involved.
Anticipating a whole new appreciation for “free speech” from the wingnuts, but they still won’t get it. Like trying to use a superball instead of a softball; they will make the moves, but the results will be wildly off.
These silly people seem to think that they won the shooting match at Waco.
As ham-handed and tragic as the ATF and Justice Dept response was, David Koresh and his followers showed what happens when even a well-armed band of right-wingers thinks they can outgun the Feds.
Only mercy stayed the hand of Uncle Sam as long as it did. If the evil government of “jack-booted thugs” had been REALLY serious, a simple air-strike would have ended the “standoff” in about 5 minutes.
Ooh dream weasel, I believe you can get me through the night
Ooh dream weasel, I believe we can reach the morning light
I’ll stop now.
Crap, somebody beat me to it. Great minds run in the same gutters.
Poor black people has all r munny 2
Sing with me, sing for the year
Sing for the laughter, sing for the tears
Sing with me, if it’s just for today
Maybe tomorrow, the good lord will take you away
Dreamweasel Dreamweasel Dreamweasel
Dream until your dreams come true
Dreamweasel Dreamweasel Dreamweasel
Dream until your dream comes through
Dreamweasel Dreamweasel Dreamweasel
Dreamweasel Dreamweasel
Dreamweasel Dreamweasel
Dreamweasel!
You’re nothing but a dreamweasel
Can you put your hands in your head?
ayoh nayo… [glammy progrockgod pronunciation]
I said dreamweasel!
You say you are a dreamweasel
Well can you put your hands in your head?
ayoh nayo…
I said far out what a day a year a laugh it is…
The righties’ creation of ACORN as a fetish enemy is yet another of the weirdest enemy fixations of the right.
My favorite wingnut fixation by far is the Vagina Monologues. Nothing can top that as a mystifying source of wingnut outrage. ACORN at least represents a threat to their political goals by registering what they consider to be the wrong type of voters. But the Vagina Monologues? Why does trying to get women to feel better about their naughty bits make the likes of K-Lo so uncomfortable? Maybe the best distraction we can provide to the wingnut brain over the next 8 years would be to get Lord Soros and his friends in Hollyweird to fund well publicized VM performances across the country. If they’re fixated on that then maybe they won’t notice the massive wealth redistribution and gun and cheeto confiscation programs Barry X is poised to commence implementation of in January.
“Thug thizzle” means doing one’s thang. However, because black people say it, it ACTUALLY means “kill whitey”.
Yup, although “thizzing” actually means something different and would send Malkin into fits of outrage all over again.
When… I met you on the Internets
You… could tell I wasn’t hard to get
You asked me what’s my pleasure, A fisking or a measure, I’ll have a piece of pie
And tell you of my Dreamweasel… Dreamweasel’s free
Dreamweasel…Dreamweasel’s free
(stupid carriage return doesn’t work here, does it?)
I liked this regarding the raid.
(Note that ACORN is legally prohibited from throwing out registration forms, even if they’re obviously bogus.)
Im getting wise,
And Im feeling like a Dreamweasel like you,
Its you that I want so please,
Just a causal, casual easy thing.
It isnt? it is for me.
And I like you,
Yeah I like you,
And I like you, I like you, I like you, I like you, I like you, I like you
I like you.
And I feel wahoo, woooo
Gonna find my baby, gonna hold her tight
gonna grab some dreamweasel delight.
My motto’s always been; when it’s right, it’s right.
Why wait until the middle of a cold dark night.
When everything’s a little clearer in the light of day.
And you know the night is always gonna be there any way.
Sky rockets in flight. dreamweasel delight. dreamweasel delight.
MM’s fixation with us darkies and joos is sad. BTW, isn’t she ASIAN? or something.
They got little hands
And little eyes
And they walk around
Tellin’ great big lies
They got little noses
And tiny little teeth
They wear platform shoes
On their nasty little feet
Well, I don’t want no Dreamweasels
Don’t want no Dreamweasels
Don’t want no Dreamweasels
Round here
Half a pound of tuppenny rice,
Half a pound of treacle.
That’s the way the money goes,
Pop! goes the dreamweasel.
Up and down the City road,
In and out the Eagle,
That’s the way the money goes,
Pop! goes the dreamweasel.
.
A penny for a spool of thread,
A penny for a needle.
That’s the way the money goes,
Pop! goes the dreamweasel.
.
Every night when I go out
The monkey’s on the table
Take a stick and knock it off
Pop goes the dreamweasel
.
Round and round the mulberry bush
The monkey chased the dreamweasel.
The monkey stopped to pull up his socks
And Pop goes the dreamweasel.
.
I’ve no time to plead and pine
I’ve no time to wheedle
Kiss me quick, and then I’m gone
Pop! Goes the dreamweasel.
.
I’ve seen all Dreamweasels turn their heads each day so satisfied I’m on my way.
I’ve seen all Dreamweasels turn their heads each day so satisfied I’m on my way.
I’ve seen all Dreamweasels turn their heads each day so satisfied I’m on my way.
I’ve seen all Dreamweasels turn their heads each day so satisfied I’m on my way.
I’ve seen all Dreamweasels turn their heads each day so satisfied I’m on my way.
I’ve seen all Dreamweasels turn their heads each day so satisfied I’m on my way.
Yea, yea.
I’ve seen all Dreamweasels turn their heads each day so satisfied I’m on my way.
I’ve seen all Dreamweasels turn their heads each day so satisfied I’m on my way.
I’ve seen all Dreamweasels turn their heads each day so satisfied I’m on my way.
I’ve seen all Dreamweasels turn their heads each day so satisfied I’m on my way.
Cheer up, Kathryn Jean
Oh, what can it mean
To a Daydream Dreamweasel
And a wingnut extreme…
O, what land is the Land of Dreamweasel?
What are its mountains, and who is its Ted Geisel?
O Father, I saw my ferret there,
Among the lillies by waters fair.
Dear child, I also by engines diesel
Have wandered all night in the Land of Dreamweasel;
But though calm and warm the polecats stride,
I could not get to the other side.
Aaaaaargh! May you all be eaten by radioactive ear roaches.
I h8 you. I h8 you all.
She’s not the only one to exhibit a loathing of actual democracy when it doesn’t go their way.
Voters of America, they think you’re a stupid tool only fit to follow their dictats and your stupid opinions don’t matter, because you’re stupid. And you’re stupid if you don’t let them do the thinking for you, you stupid little plebe. Stop standing stupidly there and start drilling me some oil.
It was a beautiful day, the sun beat down
I had the radio on, I was drivin
The trees went by, me and del were singin
Little runaway, I was flyin
Yeah runnin down a Dreamweasel
That never would come to me
Workin on a mystery, goin wherever it leads
Im runnin down a Dreamweasel
I felt so good, like anything was possible
I hit cruise control and rubbed eyes
The last three days the rain was unstoppable
It was always cold, no sun shine
Yeah runnin down a Dreamweasel
That never would come to me
Workin on a mystery, goin wherever it leads
Im runnin down a Dreamweasel
I rolled on as the sky grew dark
I put the pedal down to make some time
Theres something good waitin down this road
Im pickin up whatever is mine
Yeah runnin down a Dreamweasel
That never would come to me
Workin on a mystery, goin wherever it leads
Im runnin down a Dreamweasel
Dreamweasel Susie
Dreamweasel Sam
Do the jitterbug
Down in dreamweasel land
Looks like dreamweasel love.
Dreamweasels Ripped My Flesh
I was OK until the Starland Dreamweasel Band lyrics.
Now, please excuse me while I go blow (what’s left of) my brains out.
OK, that’s all taken care of.
Now, what’s this I hear about Barack Hussein Osama actually being Osama bin Laden?
oo-wah oo-wah
oo-wah oo-wah
WHY DO DREAMWEASELS FALL IN LOVE?
I want to send “The Truth” to Gitmo.
Also, I hate puppies.
Weasel, weasel candlelight
Doin’ the town and doin’ it right
In the evenin’
It’s pretty pleasin’
Weasel Susie, Weasel Sam
Do the jitterbug out in weasel land
And they shimmy
And Sammy’s so skinny
And they whirled and they twirled and they tangoed
Singin’ and jingin’ the jango
Floatin’ like the heavens above
It looks like weasel love
Nibbling on bacon, chewin’ on cheese
Sammy says to Susie “Honey, would you please be my missus?”
And she say yes
With her kisses
And now he’s ticklin’ her fancy
Rubbin’ her toes
Muzzle to muzzle, now anything goes
As they wriggle, and Sue starts to giggle
And they whirled and they twirled and they tangoed
Singin’ and jingin’ the jango
Floatin’ like the heavens above
It looks like weasel love
La da da da da …
Andrew:
I don’t like puppies either. I prefer kittens. I love kittens. Do you like kittens? If you do, let me know & I’ll share recipes…
The Truth lost my respect by omitting any reference to dreamweasels.
Fahr’n schnell schnell schnell mit die Dreamweasel
Fahr’n schnell schnell schnell mit die Dreamweasel…