Mark Hemingway: Too Big To Fail
Shorter Mark Hemingway:
Above: CONSERVITISM… UR DOIN IT WRONG*
- Okay, okay. No, yes. Oh God, no. Oh crap. Okay, no, wait! Wait! Look everyone: Guess what? [does sprightly jazz hands] Michael Moore is fat!
‘Shorter’ concept created by Daniel Davies and perfected by Elton Beard. We are aware of all Internet traditions.™
* Cf. National Review éminence gris Jeffrey Hart.
On Returning: Computer blew up, been offline for days and days unending.
Also, I’d like to reproduce this statement of Roy Edroso’s to further account for my absence:
I thought five-plus years of covering this kind of gibberish had inured me to it, but here it is only September of a Presidential election year and every time I step even into the foot-washing pool of the political scene I feel as if I have been fatally poisoned. The degeneracy of political discourse in the internet age has been my subject, but I feel as if it is getting away from me, screaming beyond my capacity to keep up. Is it really so much worse than it has been, or am I getting soft?
It’s like a stroboscopic drug cyclone. Moreover, it’s like that, and you’re swaying in a chair with a ballpoint pen and a notebook, trying to capture the profundity of the experience. You think you’re explaining how people’s reality-tunnels don’t allow them to experience the quantum verb-act that is ‘being,’ but later, when you look at what you wrote, there’s a drawing of the Zig-Zag man with a speech balloon that says “Zoinks.”
Regardless, I’m back with a bong bang, as it were.
Wait a minute. Why did you photo-shop that poor kitty’s body on to whatever the hell that head belongs to?!
You’d think he wouldn’t be so brazen about using such obvious canards — is it in the Republican platform that the GOP “likes war”? Are they anti-environment and anti-women?
Just what the heck could “canard” mean?
My favorite part is how the American public is supposed to agree with the Republicans on immigration. Republicans don’t even agree with Republicans on immigration.
is it in the Republican platform that the GOP “likes war”? Are they anti-environment and anti-women?
Yes. Any more questions?
Well, he actually got in half a sentence of accuracy…
Of course, he doesn’t realize that it applies to every fucking word he’s ever written.
OTT, but check out young Sarah Heath:
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2008/09/26/sarah-palins-beauty-pagea_n_129667.html
Boomin.’ Shame she’s crazy.
Oh noes! What’s we gonna do, boss? The cat’s out of the bag, the Truth read an article! And he liked it! How could you, as arbiters of snarkiness, allow such a thing to happen!?!?!?!?!?!?!?
/fauxtrage
Bubba–
“Canard” means duck. And if it looks like a canard, and quacks like a canard, etc.
Poor rabbit. It’s been turned into a manimal.
Since when did that stop anyone?
The Truth said,
September 26, 2008 at 21:55
Um, good work at linking to an article that points out Moore’s hypocrisy. I enjoyed reading it.
Troofie, looking at “pitchers” and “oooohing” is not reading.
Because, y’know, NY, SF and LA aren’t actually in America.
Last I checked, there were plenty of guns in NY. I don’t think there’s any great shortage of them in LA either, and I know more than a few avid gun owners in SF. Not to mention, if my somewhat limited and long ago experience with academia has any validity at all, blowing shit up and shooting things are as critical to a college education as are copious volumes of hallucinogenics, often concurrently.
Dipshit also really needs to look up the word provincialism again. I do not think it means what he thinks it means.
Even us amateurs need a break from mockin these folk now n then Gavin, no need to explain.
On Returning: Computer blew up, been offline for days and days unending.
Yeah, well, using a shotgun instead of Quit… will do that. Though for all the shit you read everyday, I wouldn’t blame you in the slightest.
Erm, just how many right-wing fanatic icons are poor or from Montana?
Man, that’s some of the most pompous writing I’ve ever read.
“Because, y’know, NY, SF and LA aren’t actually in America.”
No, cuz they’re full of fags!
Hey Mark, what about stalking and harassing injured twelve year olds? How do Real Americans feel about that?
Can I just say that I hope the VP debates have a swimsuit segment?
Other than Ted Kaczynski?
Well shit, Gavin. Tell you what. Next time you have computer problems, let me know. I live inside 128, that’s what I do for a living, and I’ve been to UU “summer camp”. When I say “Clara Barton”, do you want to laugh?
Woohoo! The Sadly, No! Bong and Surf Club is back in bizniz!
Boomin.’ Shame she’s crazy.
Drat – I’m getting a video-no-longer available message.
Not too surprised, but it hinders the opposition research, you see.
Re: the degeneracy of political discourse in the internet age
For example.
Drat – I’m getting a video-no-longer available message.
Try here Sam
Gav,
For some reason that reminds me of a quote from The Crying of Lot 49 that I can’t quite remember. Something about Oedipa watching as her husband spirals off into the depths of his LSD abuse “and farther and farther away from that which has passed.” Crap, I could have sworn I had a copy around here somewhere.
That said, yah, this election is like a Phil Dick/Thomas Pynchon/Franz Kafka collaboration novel re-written for the small screen by the Monty Python cast and then reassembled with a completely random page order. It really is a shame Hunter Thompson didn’t make it for this one.
Y’know, I’ve often thought that what “the Left” needs is an icon who’s had several combat tours in Special Forces and is still in the Reserves and possesses an extensive personal armory, is a graduate of Harvard Law AND has a PhD in Econ, AND has memorized the Bible and the Quran and most significant other western classics, AND has served a couple terms as governor of a midwestern state.
And then I realize that it wouldn’t make a fucking bit of difference to these assholes.
This much is accurate
It is Karl Rove’s genius that he can play the social elites and the working class off against one another while the true ruling class goes unscathed. Take for instance the Wall Street bail out. What will most likely happen is that the working class will suffer the most from it, liberal elites will take the blame and the true culprits will walk away with a cool 700 billion plus. We need to break that cycle instead of getting sucked into the class warfare that benefits the top wealthy top %2.
Mike’s Election Guide is a lame bit of cultural detritus that every living thing can and should safely ignore
Except, apparently, right wing wackos who seem to be Moore’s most devoted readers. I don’t know any one of my “leftist” friends who’ve even heard of this book, but every right wing bloviator seems to have already committed the damn thing to memory.
The fact is all of you can go to hell.
Gives Hemingway’s a bad name
Lady Rothschild would call him an elitist.
justme;
Last I checked, there were plenty of guns in NY.
jas
Erm, just how many right-wing fanatic icons are poor or from Montana?
These are mere facts, what one would expect from the reality based left. They don’t matter to Rove and his imitators. Rove manipulates perception not reality. This gives you immediate results but then you get the crash and burn we see now when reality catches up to you. It also helps if you own the media.
The better approach is to manipulate perception and reality in the right proportions. Obama’s campaign does that I believe.
from Freerepublic:
“Another Traitor to the Cause: Kathleen Parker”
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/2091347/posts
god damn it – the fires of hell are frozen glaciers compared to my hatred of wordpress.
Hank Paulson,
Um, no.
It’s not.
By any stretch of the imagination. Unless, of course, you’re a wingnut, for whom no flight of fant’sy is too great for credence.
It is a nonsensical strawman of a sentence right from the beginning. What the fuck is a “leftist icon” these days, anyway? Hm, right. I forgot. Phil Ochs and Woody Guthrie were insulated by wealth and academia while they were growing up in New York. Jesus fucking Christ.
David Robinson,
Oh, my. I forget how absurd that place is sometimes.
Because Reagan never wore makeup or dyed his hair or anything. Yup, that Reagan was all about substance over style, alrighty.
At least they are becoming less and less relevant. Their threads used to garner four and five hundred comments. Now it seems fifty is pushing the top.
Most leftist icons arrive at their distaste for American values because they’re insulated by wealth or some form of provincialism — they’re from New York, San Francisco, or Los Angeles, or have spent their entire lives in academia and thus don’t know anyone who owns a gun or reads the Bible.
Eat a big bag of Hannah Montana gummie dicks you corpulent fascist tool.
Added bonus: they’re flesh colored!!!!
Eat a big bag of Hannah Montana gummie dicks you corpulent fascist tool.
Dear Lord, that’s the funniest thing I’ve seen all day (well, that and the Hannah Montana condom ad the gummi story links to).
Shorter Mark Hemingway: Why does it hurt when I pee?
“Another Traitor to the Cause: Kathleen Parker”
Can any of those yoyos articulate what “the cause” is?
…Hannah Montana gummie dicks…
Damn. Those pegged the Sick-N-Wrongometer™.
in re: Hannah Montana gummies
Funniest and most disgusting thing I’ve seen since Palin’s Couric interview.
Everyone did notice that the Hannah Montana gummie dicks are a Disney product, right?
More Hannah Montana gummie dicks – these in colors other than “flesh”.
I TOLD you we should sterilized Sarah Palin back when she was poor.
Did someone raise the topic of disturbing confectionary?
I read that Hemmingway guy’s article, and all I can say is, he’s no Hemmingway!
The idea that prominent liberals are alienated from the working class is a strawman?
Don’t think so.
The entire failed history of the left in America says otherwise. Rove is just the latest in a long line of those who been able to undermine any progress by pitting one against the other. I don’t understand why this would be controversial. It’s pretty common knowledge, or should be.
Banality of evil — DO NOT WANT!!
Please photoshop the cat sitting on Mark Hemmingway’s face and smothering him in his sleep.
I just had a daymare.
Can ayone imagine where we would be if the Republican Kleptocrat Machine was still controlling congress? They’d have given Paulson an extra trillion $ and insisted he not tell them where it was going.
Can we all thank whatever deity/demon/sprite/quantum wave function we prefer that the 2006 elections prevented that?
At least they are becoming less and less relevant. Their threads used to garner four and five hundred comments. Now it seems fifty is pushing the top.
I have hung around S,N! long enough to shake my naive belief that the length of a comment thread is correlated with its relevance.
You should. You’re accepting Rove’s false premise. Here, let me make it right for you:
I have hung around S,N! long enough to shake my naive belief that the length of a comment thread is correlated with its relevance.
But…but…but just look at possibly the most relevantest thread EVAH!!!!
How can you say that? I’m terribly disappointed, Mr. C.
Oh, wow. That’s even better than the gummy lighthouses and the Britney Spears “Got Milk” ads.
Excellent.
You just know that the guys who actually made the decision to have flesh colored guitars knew damned well what they were doing. “Hey, let’s see if we can slip this past the suits.”
“Another Traitor to the Cause: Kathleen Parker”
Instead of realizing what they’ve been handed, and opting for a better choice, they are bound and determined to eat that shit sandwich and ENJOY IT!
Can I just say that I hope the VP debates have a swimsuit segment?
Nononononono no no no no NO! Just think, Biden in a banana-hammock!
*blind!*
noen said,
September 27, 2008 at 0:38
Holy fuck! Did you even read the sentence in question? Do you actually need word-by-word Fisking to rub your nose in the stinking idiocy of that statement?
You arrive at “prominent liberals are alienated from the working class” from reading “leftist icons arrive at their distaste for American values”? Wow. I don’t even think a proper Fisking could pull your head far enough out of your ass to see how wrong that is.
My psychic put a curse on this blog.
That’s it Althouse! I am SO suing you.
My appraisal was actually less about any given thread, and more about the site in general. There used to be a lot more people frequenting the site, hence longer threads. It seems to have been reduced to a shadow of its former traffic, and as far as I’m concerned, that can be nothing but good.
You should. You’re accepting Rove’s false premise. Here, let me make it right for you:
1. It isn’t Rove’s premise, it predates him by approx. 200 years. The idea of divide and conquer goes back much further.
2. Low information voters – Not everyone gathers information the same way. Certain personality types make their decisions by thinking, reading, deliberating. Others not so much. This is just reality. If one limits one’s campaign to reaching only a subset of all voters one should not be surprized at the results.
Sadly No! is a humor site and humor is based on caricature. While people like Malkin and others really are as shallow and self absorbed as they appear. We should not mistake the caricature for reality.
Slavoj Žižek:
In Dean’s 2004 campaign he was beginning to make that populist appeal from the left. We need to recapture that.
It seems to have been reduced to a shadow of its former traffic, and as far as I’m concerned, that can be nothing but good.
It does seem to imply either a higher rate of employment among wingnuts or a higher rate of truly catastrophic illness.
I guess there’s a possibility some of them have John Coled it but it seems unlikely.
It takes energy to blow up a lead balloon.
When there’s lots of people blowing it up with you, that’s not so bad. But if the wingers are finding it more and more difficult to keep the hive mind humming; or, worse yet, that these arguments are starting to ring hollow: that’s damn fine news!
…left liberals today have this upper class patronizing attitude which is an attitude as far as I can judge of deep distrust toward rednecks, ordinary people…
We should not mistake the caricature for reality.
Indeed.
I gotta say I agree with Noen (and *sigh* to some extent Hemingway) that establishment Dems really are alienated from working class concerns. Aren’t “establishment” and “alienated” almost tautological? This isn’t to say they’re elitist, or some such ridiculous smear. But does anyone really believe the Kennedy’s and Kerry’s and Pelosi’s and Boxer’s understand the little guy? They sure CARE more than Republicans, but I’m not sure they get it. We need more people like Brian Schweitzer. Obama gets its pretty well, or at least did recently in his life.We need people who get what it’s like to work for a living AND who are socially progressive in power, pronto.
Of course, that says nothing about the astroturf bullshit coming from the Republicans. Their establishment is far more mendacious and Hemignway should go eat some cat shit for defending it.
and thus don’t know anyone who owns a gun or reads the Bible.
Funny. I own guns and I read the Bible. I also find Barack Obama a little too far right for my taste.
I will tell you who hasn’t read their Bible – any one that will tell you modern conservatism and the teachings of Jesus have anything in common.
I wonder what wingnut welfare whore Mark Hemingway would make of that?
I’m with you there. But part of why Republicans connect so well with their “common folk” is because it’s faked.
It’s the way a food shoot uses Crisco for ice cream, or paints the browning on the holiday turkey. Since it’s fake, it can look better than the real thing.
This is another symptom for me is that how left liberals today have this upper class patronizing attitude which is an attitude as far as I can judge of deep distrust toward rednecks, ordinary people and so on and so on.
Oh, horseshit. That’s a modern conservative meme, propagated most strongly by Fox News.
Yes, one is a fairly neutral description and the second a biased personal account. Both are talking about the same thing. Gary Ruppert, real and fake, complains about the liberal patronizing attitude here every day. He uses different words and comes from his/her own personal experience laced with bigotry and rage but it’s still the same complaint.
It’s why we keep losing elections. Bill Clinton and Obama (hopefully) win elections because they are able to appeal to more than just the liberal elites and broaden their message. The GOP wins when they are able to frame the debate in such a way that social elites and the working class are at each others’ throats.
But part of why Republicans connect so well with their “common folk” is because it’s faked.
Another part is that they’ve bought up a lot of radio and TV stations which constantly tell people that Republicans are good and Democrats are evil.
I ordered some onion rings with lunch today and I am outraged at what they looked like.
It’s takes some real gall to call someone lame after you’ve just made a Stevie Wonder driving joke a line or two before your insult.
Do you know how much fun it is going to be for Americans to vote against Obama and his Hollywood apologists? Oh my.
Hollywood apologists are running for office?? Dude, that just makes you sound retarded.
However, I’d vote for Mat Damon (AKA hotty-hot-hot-hot pants) if I could.
LittlePig:
That’s a modern conservative meme, propagated most strongly by Fox News.
Zizek? Conservative? Here is the interview I pulled the quote from. Slavoj Zizek: What is the Question Judge for yourself. Fox News propagates the meme because it is to Rupert Murdoc’s advantage to sow enmity between the social elites, the upper middle class, and the working class.
Notice how Bush doesn’t stumble with his English as much any more? That was pure Rovian theater. It was an act designed to appeal to working stiffs and make them feel he was one of them. The more that liberals ridiculed Bush for his malapropisms the more Rove was able to drive that wedge between the two.
“PS Do you know how much fun it is going to be for Americans to vote against Obama and his Hollywood apologists? Oh my.” —The Troof
You mean real Americans, right Troof?
I am curious as perhaps I am confusing you with another proud conservative he-man who had hair on his balls when he was six years-old, but Troof, but isn’t the “LA, NYC and SAN FRAN” horseshit shake a little thick? You live in a blue state, so…
…you’re no pussy.
I’m sure there might be some people who would vote for a McCain/Palin administration that they know will be disasterous and incompetent, just for the amusement factor.
They’re probably the same people who vow to run their own electric bills sky-high just to make a statement against the idea that global warming exists, or deliberately guzzle gas just to “show” liberals.
The angry bafflement that those empty headed entertainers must feel as their fans reject their advice – well, it warms the heart.
So, I guess you won’t be seeing An American Carol, then.
Surely you aren’t intimating that any significant portion of the lengthier threads here at S,N central are anything but tackhammer-on-target and up to the minute relevant commentary?
The angry bafflement that those empty headed entertainers must feel as their fans reject their advice – well, it warms the heart.
Wow, you have a serious thinking disorder.
And personality disorder.
1) how would you know if the entertainers were baffled?
2) if the “fans” are fans, why would they reject the entertainers’ advice?
3) If the voters are not fans, why would the entertainers care what they think or do?
4) why does it please you to make people you don’t even know unhappy?
Life in the Troofy house must be a rather unpleasant passive agressive one, simmering with anger and resentment and nasty emotional manipulation.
Enjoy yourself.
POOP!
My point is that every time some idiot like Matt Damon, Sara Silverstein, Jeanine Garafalo, etc criticizes Republicans, it makes it that much sweeter to vote for Republicans.
The politics of spite. Yeah we get that. You understand of course that your Republican friends are fitting you with chains as we speak. Chains that will enslave you, your children and your grandchildren. You will never be able to retire, you will work like a dog and die like one too.
This whole banking crisis we are going through is a con, the crisis is real. It was set up deliberately in order to suck you and everyone you love dry. And not just you, your children’s children as well. They sold you a pack of lies.
Got a cocktail, a brand new pack of smokes, and some shrimp chillin’ in the fridge. This isn’t a debate, it’s a PAR-TAY!
4) why does it please you to make people you don’t even know unhappy?
To be precise, he only thinks he’s making people he doesn’t know unhappy by “not following their advice”, whatever the hell that means, and that what makes hum “happy”. Perhaps he thought Team America was a documentary or something. In any event, I’m sure Matt Damon or Sarah Silverman could give a damn what this pitiful jackass thinks.It’s like being upset that Don Imus thinks you’re a douchebag. Consider the source, y’know.
It’s not spite, it’s a gleeful rejection of hypocritical lecturing from empty headed celebrities.
Let’s just close our eyes and remember the towering achievements of the Bush presidency.
So you’re saying you’re a Sara Silverstein fan? Neat.
“My point is that every time some idiot like Matt Damon, Sara Silverstein, Jeanine Garafalo, etc criticizes Republicans….
Should just read “my point is not to answer what I think of Hemmingway’s/entire right wing’s most redonkulous talking point.” – i.e. cities where people of different races and cultures live together and have museums and good restaurants and shit are just evil.
If you believe what you say, then why doesn’t that apply to the Democratic leadership that is sponsoring the bailout?
It does apply to them. Nancy Pelosi is a very wealthy woman. I’ve felt betrayed by her and many other Dems for a long time. The corporate power structure has no problem supporting either Dem or GOP. either way they can get their laws passed. Laws that fuck you and me up the ass but are good for them.
Do you really think that Murdoc gives a rat’s ass about you? The first thing you do when you get a lot of money is you find a way to keep it. You are a threat to him so he wants to keep his foot on your throat. He does that by feeding you lies.
I don’t have any pie, and I could not be less interested in what a fake internet troll thinks about anything. I wouldn’t piss on him if he was on fire, but hey, you guys knock y’selves out.
Meantime, I’ve been looking forward to the debates for months, McThirdfromthebottom vs. Harvardlaw. And yeah, I’m pretty sure it’s gonna be a thrashing, smart charismatic young man vs. old man yells at clouds. But I’m starting to think that it’s going to make me cringe. I don’t know if I can do this. Maybe I should just read the transcript in the morning. Hell, the brewers-cubs game is way more interesting, anything to keep those freakin mets out of the playoffs.
It’s already bad enough the fucking dodgers are in. ‘Course they won’t get past the first round, but I want to root for Brewers-Rays.
mikey
Hell,lemme see how much scotch I can get in my bloodstream in the next fifteen minutes..
mikey
Well, I’m getting ready, but I don’t expect fireworks this debate. One will be controlling his temper, and one will be showing his.
Mikey! Watch the debates with me! I’m having a party over here! It’ll be fun, I swear!
Kerry is a fucking clown. He threw that election on purpose.
It’s not spite, it’s a gleeful rejection of hypocritical lecturing from empty headed celebrities.
Look, just stop with the projection already. Most of the Hollywood celebs to achieve any measure of actual political power have been conservatives. You and other conservatives know this, of course, which explains your pathological obsession with what the likes of Rosie O’Donnell and Barbra Streisand have to say. You’re the only ones who care.
Put down the People magazine, switch off Entertainment Tonight and give your nerves a rest already.
Hey, your dead selves, I’m in.
I’ve had some rockin nights with bodies piled up outside my pathetic little hole.
Um, please interpret that statement carefully…
mikey
Noen, then why support the Democrats?
They represent a chance. I want to believe that freedom is still possible. I see zero chance with the GOP.
Um, that’s easily the dirtiest thing I’ve read all night.
So is this the Sadly, No! debates liveblogging thread?
‘Cause if I’m hanging around down here and they switch to a new thread, I swear I’m gonna….
mikey
Hell,lemme see how much scotch I can get in my bloodstream in the next fifteen minutes..
Nikki Sixx has advice.
Hi mikey! L’Chaim!
An know what?
Nikki has NEVER steered me wrong…
mikey
Drinks on me!
Thomas Jefferson’s Gazelle Water
Ingredients:
6 jiggers cunning gazelle prostatic fluid, beatifically strained
1 ounce rhythmic brown rum, frequently mixed
Add the gazelle prostatic fluid knavishly to the brown rum since it’s heavier. Serve in a large pointed tumbler. Await compliments.
Bring it, ‘Bear.
Are we all workin CSPAN?
Or do we want some blow-dried dickhead to tell us what to think?
‘Cause hey, I’m flexible….
mikey
I’m probably not watching the debates though so I won’t get the jokes.
Oh shit, I’m on CNN. Wolf Blitzer fascinates me.
mikey’s terrified Debate Cocktail
Pour seven jiggers terrified Islay Malt in a glass.
Try to think pleasant thoughts.
Drink.
Lather.
Rinse.
Repeat..
mikey
Load. Light. Enhale. Repeat.
I’m on MSNBC for Keith and Rachel. But we switch around.
The night Obama won the primary the gobsmacked faces on the Fox news sheeple… priceless.
Jim Leherer looks very lifelike tonight.
I ::heart:: Jim Lehrer!
Whoa, first question is finances!
Getting that 700 lb. gorilla out of the way early.
Shoot. What happened to the 8pm start. I haven’t missed it yet? Fuck – I don’t know if I can sit through John McCain answering kwestions without someone filtering out the creepy smile.
John McCain’s Creme d’Ananas Ice
Ingredients:
4 shots tough buzzard semen, systematically swirled
6 parts creme d’ananas
3 jars exceptional Irish cream liqueur
Stir all ingredients repressedly with ice, strain contents faithlessly into an eerie jug and serve.
Oh, lordy, McCain brings the bringdown.
I haz a bukit.
The fact is, I haz a bukit.
Uh, what?
Shalom, gentlemen.
You are both mistaken, because clearly I haz a bukit.
Is it just me, or did John McCain not even come close to answering the question?
Listening to the debate being aired in Canada.
McCain’s opening – his sad sack disingenuous comment about Senator Kennedy, followed by his statement that Rethugs and Democrats are sitting together to solve the financial problem – made me barf. Dishonest and emotionally manipulative…blech. I hope Americans aren’t fooled by this act.
McCain is channeling Sarah Palin. Drone sighted.
It’s not spite, it’s a gleeful rejection of hypocritical lecturing from empty headed celebrities.
Hell, folks on the right fucking invented the whole “ditto-head” complete submission to the opinions of vapid talking heads, but whatevs.
Oh lordy, no. McCain’s looking like shit right now.
No, no. All three of you are wrong. Like I’ve been saying all along, Christmas is coming early. By that I meant Christmas is coming early at my house. So I haz a bukit. No one else can have one because I haz a bukit.
McCain is going to cry “boohoo I’m a nice man” every time Obama blames Republicans for the past eight years.
Y’all just wait one cotton pickin minute. None of y’all haz a bukit. Because, I haz a bukit.
Commie Obama wants to make you give half of your bukkit to the gov’t.
. . .And now he’s desperately trying to downplay the fact that he’s Oldy McOlderson the Eldest.
Ooooh, McCain… American workers are not so hot on you.
I like the american worker
‘course, I have no interest in paying that motherfucker well.
But he’s an asskicked, that american worker…
mikey
McCain tried to bring a funny!
Oh, here comes the pen!
Now guys. Stop trying to sow divisoniveness on the right. All of you are just jealous, jealous I say! Because I haz a bukit.
It’s an old pen!
So earmarks are to blame for the mess on Wall Street?
Walnuts needs more makeup!
Taxes are to blame for EVERYTHING!
Diddily diddily ding dong. wazzup fellas. Don’t make me open up a can of whoop ass because I haz a bukit. So suck it! Coach out.
Goddam it.
If we could just save those eighteen billion dollars in earmarks everything would be ok.
Goddam it.
mikey
McCain loves talking about earmarks because then he doesn’t have to talk about THE WAR.
Don’t mention THE WAR.
Ireland?! What businesses are in Ireland?!
I mean, besides Guinness.
WereBear–Oh yeah . He just doesn’t have that annoying voice and accent.
How much did our little Liberty University spawn squander in Irackeystan, again?
My fellow trolls. Lets not get into this. None of you haz a bukit, because I haz a bukit. If any of you claim to haz a bukit again I’ll tell Ann Althouse and she’ll sue you for libel.
He’s starting with “my friends.”
Shots at the ready…
It’s going to be a long night… I already need another cocktail.
Apparently the rest of you have followed Osamabama’s lead and resorted to lying. I’m the ONLY ONE who haz a bukit. Anyone else who claims to haz a bukit is a homosekshual and a traitor to America.
Oh, they’re going to bring up the WAR and the ‘surge’. Just wait.
My remote finger is starting to twitch.
I don’t think I can do this…
mikey
Why does McCain have white eyeshadow on?
Cheers amd go for the drinks!
Ahh, already lying, that McCain.
No Mikey! Stay!
Part of the Solution?
sha, right!
C,mon, mikey, McCain’s starting to do the rictus smile…
Fuck goddam.
I’m bailing.
The Brewers game won’t make me want to slap a fresh mag into the G3
mikey
McCain just said he wants to increase defense spending. I’m going to get drunker.
Why don’t all of you shut the fuck up okay! Nobody haz a bukit until I say they haz a bukit, got it?! One more word out of the rest of y’all and I’ll see y’all in court!
How does reducing spending help anyone out? And how can you cut spending when we’re spending eleventy-jagillion dollars on the war?
I call FAIL on McWrinklyface.
We’ve got to cut spending.
Sure, Walnuts. You’ve been in the Senate just as long as Joe Liarman.
STFU.
If the motherfucker says “john’s right” one more time I’m just gonna give up…
M
Ooooooooooo, Jim Lehrer’s getting pissed!
McCain is going for spending freeze on everything but war, the victims and war, and future wars.
Johnny One Note.
And werebear, right after he said that he seemed to be complaing that we are wasting all that money on countries that don’t like us. Hubby heard it too. Is he fucking crazy?
That smile is creeping me out.
Why is healthcare paid for by the gov’t such a bad thing, McOldy-old-old-old pants? Huh??
God, I hate you. The “Free Market” solves NOTHING.
90%!!!!!!!!!!!!! Voting with Bush!!!!!!!!
Kay O!
OBAMA USED THE WORD “ORGY”!!!!
Awesome!
So glad that at least Barry’s talkin’ health care.
Again with johnny’s “not Miss Congenality” claim. WTF.
Hey, did y’all know McCain’s a maverick? He just said so, so it must be true, right?
I’m taking a drink every time he says “maverick” or “miss congeniality” and I’m well on my way to being drunk.
If he says POW I’m shooting the TV
Hmm.
Obama’s not even close to kicking his ass.
This is ridiculous.
I’m switchin to glide…
mikey
we are winning in Iraq. victory. blah blah. right johnny.
Suuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuurge. And Iran. General P.
The Trifecta.
Quit with the teasing Mikey, what’s the name of that song? Now I’m humming it but can’t quite get the lyrics.
obama’s holding up well I think.
Kick it re Iraq. I’m glad he brought that up as something we might consider CUTTING from the budget.
Ooo, we’re on VP choice now…
Oh snap! “The War started in 2003!” We’re getting bitchy now!
Now it’s lighting up. Obama’s coming down hard on the war.
why is obama so agreeable? \\
did mccain ask if barak knew the definition of rich?
McCain is soundly losing this debate.
He’s may have his pouty voice on, but what he’s saying is such obvious shit.
McPOW defending the Iraq clusterfuck.
Notice how he won’t make eye contact with Obama.
This moderator has to be either the weakest I’ve ever seen, or the savviest.
Iraq: “Peace and prosperity?” I was under the impression it was ethnic cleansing, not the US actually fixing what we screwed up.
McCain says Obama’s spending plans are unrealistic.
The Iraq War which McCain supports prolonging is costing $10-billion a month.
lesley: McRage doesn’t like being criticized or questioned. (Did you know he was a POW?)
Obama’s staying cool. He knows his stuff and he’s showing it. McLame is just repeating talking points and pulling the rictus grin.
McWrinkles hasn’t mentioned his POW status yet. I’m waitin’ for it.
If Obama is calm, it gets under McCain’s skin.
He’s been told he has to keep his temper in this debate, I hear. Because he wants to lose it.
Shot of whiskey every time he says “maverick”
Gulp of beer with every “miss congeniality”
Tequila shot waiting for the POW mention.
Awe, my hubby just left me to play Warhammer. Now I’m drinkin’ alone. 🙁
A friend of mine who specializes in investigating insurance fraud tells me a sure sign of a liar – during a situation like this – is the person coughing. Notice how many times McCain interjects with a little cough?
In the meantime, sip of wine every time Obama’s talking.
Our Dead Selves: No you’re not. We’re here with ya.
Dude, that just makes you sound retarded.
Twoof sounding retarded?! How shocking! Next thing you know, Clay Aiken might come out!
We have switched over to CNN which has an Audience Reaction Chart at the bottom… Independents moving more with Democrats than with Republicans, by a wide margin.
The only thing that would make this debate better entertainment would be Obama vs Palin.
“If you have to do things, you have to do things.”
Like these sorts of things, Sen. McCain? Or was I not supposed to say that out loud?
I’m watching PBS. No crawl, no annoying logos. Just full screen.
MzNicky: I know, but you’re that enabler friend who just wants to make me drunk!
Oooooooh, he just brought up singing songs about bombing Iran.
Someone should tell McCain it’s no longer a good idea to talk to the American people as if they are two years old and need two and two spelled out for them. His condescending tone would infuriate me as a voter, especially after 8 years of Bush doing that. (At least Bush does it because he’s a simpleton who can’t add two and two himself.)
ODS: Oh no! Well, sometimes you just got to.
OMG Barack just mentioned the “bomb bomb bomb bomb Iran” thing! awesome.
He keeps looking at McPOW and trying to do what Lehrer wants — engagement between the two, like an actual debate. Gramps isn’t even making eye contact. Then he addresses the moderator. Suck.
SHIT. Obama has to keep pointing out his lies to him.
I’m actually embarrassed for McCain with his lame little heh heh and folksy anecdotes. And his utter shamelessness.
And it’s not beer o’clock here yet.
Wait for it… no, he didn’t go there… yet.
Barf! McTwitchy Eye admires Ronald Reagan the most? Gross!
Town Hall Meeting…. slug of rum.
“wear a bracelet for my son.” Pandering shitbag.
And if I hear “I’ll tell ya” one more time (or the bracelet story) I’m gonna be sick.
Can we please define what “victory” or “defeat” means?
oh christ another mother, this one “at the airport.”
Here it is! Does this count as POW? All right! Tequile shot time.
It’s dueling bracelets! Obama for the win.
Are they srsly comparing braclets!!?!@#?RgGGG
ha ha ha! Barry’s got his OWN bracelet! EAT IT, McShitbag!
I can’t wait for this freaking debate to be over. I can’t listen to McCain much longer.
I do kind of like the audience response-o-meter on CNN. Obama seems to be winning the independents.
McSame is making a lot of dramatic faces, isn’t he?
Wow. McCain got a big cobag dip in the audience response when he started this reply.
Oh god, if I was Obama I’d just be screaming “fuck you! Fuck you! Fuck you!”
I’m a crappy debater.
Sweet! Obama gets in a nice word for Jim, there.
McCain says “Everybody knows…” a lot.
Everybody seems to wonder what it’s like down here. I gotta get away
from this day-to-day running around, everybody knows this is nowhere. Everybody knows this is nowhere. Everybody, everybody knows everybody knows.
Why can’t McShame address his remarks to Obama? He’s coming off like RoboCandidate.
Can we not talk about Israel for once? Please? Let’s stick to the US!
Straight talk! Pure grain alcohol with a kiwi chaser.
McCain has to make dramatic faces. He can’t make pretty ones.
Although, that’s a shit ton of makeup they’ve slathered on him. Anyone have this in HD? Is the pancake batter obvious?
Found that Nation article from comments at GG. Apologies if it’s been mentioned before. It’s a little too long to excerpt and give the full effect of how damning the evidence is that Nixon (and a whole bunch of politicians since from Reagan and Bush Sr. to McCain and John Kerry) have been covering up about the 150 to 500 or so POW’s that the Vietnamese had kept as bargaining pieces after the Paris peace treaty was signed in exchange for reparations which the U.S. Congress never approved. Neither side wanted to admit that they’d lied about giving back all the POW’s so they left them all to die.
Shit, I know the U.S. government has done some pretty bad stuff but for some reason I assumed that the guys like Vietnam Vets Against John McCain had to be at least a little kooky, but no, it has all been a big X-Files style government cover-up all along. Like I said, read the whole thing.
McCain’s comment about “you don’t say you’re gonna [launch strikes on Pakistan] out loud” but sometimes ya gotta do things you don’t like seemed even more sinister having recently read about the POW coverup scandal.
WTF is up with this “existential threat” dealio? Does not mean what they seem to think it means. Well, he did just mention “the French.”
Oh holy fuck. McShame just said “straight talk.” I’m drinking the whole bottle now.
I tried watching this in HD, but it’s kinda horrifying.
McCain sure likes to name drop and talk about his buddies in DC, given his claims to not be an insider and all. Yeesh.
STOP WITH ISRAEL. Seriously. I’m practically a Jew, and I still worry more about the US than Israel!
Dr. Mrs.: I’m watching HD. Obama’s makeup looks heavy and greasy too.
McLame’s makeup looks more matte.
Say it with me, John: Ahmadinejad .
Ah. HD is no one’s friend then.
I hope McCain keeps trying to pronounce Ahmadinejad. It’s going swimmingly for him so far.
is it pronounced “AK ma dinne jad”? I noticed the Palindrone said it that way.
What “preconditions” to talking with teh bad guyz? Wanna spell those out?
McOldy doesn’t realize that Ahmadinejad isn’t the most powerful peson in Iran.
Experience, my ass.
League oh
HeroesNations, beaches!We will all bomb bomb bomb Iran (I don’t think McInsane cleared this bit with his fellow democracy/heroes).
Your own advisor!
McCain scribbles frantically.
Obama’s much more clear on the advantages of diplomacy. He’s not missing a beat. No wonder McCain wanted to avoid a debate.
Mikey with ‘The Kings’, for the win.
And we’ve got Spain!
Yesss! Kick his ASS over the head of Spain, Obama.
SPAIN! Obama brought up Spain! BOO-YEAH!
Not literally, of course. eewww.
McCain is sure bombing the hell out of every joke he tries, isn’t he?
Dr. Missus, the faces mC Lame is making when Obama is talking (rictusy smirks, etc.) make me want to punch him out.
It’s like a little smug asshole in junior high.
STOP WITH THE ISRAEL.
JUST STOP.
Note to John: keep trying to be funny. That’s a sure winner.
The heights of Koreans…
The relative heights of Koreans? Huh?
I don’t get Jim Lehrer telling them to talk directly to each other. WTF is this, a marriage counseling session? It is fucked up that McCain won’t even look at Obama though.
Oooh, the Spain crack pissed McCain off.
North Korea has a prison that makes people shorter? Shit.
McCain seems on the edge of losing it now. Stay tuned . . .
My good friend Dr. Kissinger. Great.
Fucking hell, this is getting me sooooooo pissed off.
Damn. Obama’s starting to enjoy this. That last smile was devastating.
I hope to God the average American can see what a total dickhead McCain is.
I have no idea how it wouldn’t be obvious, but then I don’t understand why anyone supports him in the first place.
oh boy Russia. Bring up Gov. Lipstick and how she can see Putin’s head flying in the airspace over Alaska from her kitchen widow.
OK so apparently what Obama needs to do to get John to flip his shit completely is simply to quote John’s own words to him. Try that again, Barack.
I hope McCain blows up and shouts “Cunt!”
lesley: I’m waiting for him to scream that at McPalin, on air.
Speaking of McCain’s anger problem…doesn’t he sound like he’s on valium?
Is anyone else on CNN? The last couple times, when McCain started talking, the audience response from INDs has tanked.
Obama’s naive.
“I saw three letters in Putin’s eyes: K, G, and B.”
Fuck you you fuck.
Now McShittypants is just being condescending. Shit, my old, racist Granddad could do a better job of not looking like a jerk.
To quote MNFTIU, “When Henry Kissinger signs a government check, does he use the bloody stump of an East Timorese child’s arm?”
So do we all.
Does the KGB even exist anymore?
yeah, include them in NATO. What about warmongering on their behalf? Does he not even listen to his fucking running mate’s idiocy?
Bomb Russia, too!
Bomb everybody!
hehe, McCain talking about respecting international boundaries, when he supported the invasion of sovereign Iraq
Even though I’m not a christian I have to say
“Amen, MzNicky”
justme: Even Drunky McHitchens thinks Kissinger should be tried as a war criminal.
What I meant was, half the audience was hoping McCain loses it.
The Ukrenians are attacking!!
sorry about sp
I can’t get over how supercilious and arrogant McInsane appears by refusing to make eye contact with Obama, or address his remarks to him, as Obama, cooly and calmly, does with him. Very telling.
It just amazes me that Kissinger still manages to have any kind of hand in our government. It’s truly disgusting.
Talking about energy, Obama loses R’s but no one else.
Have Americans felt “more safe” under Bush? Uh no.
What about the oil the US exports?
Is Mc I-got-my-plane-shot-down-in-‘Nam sniffling and coughing or laughing?
I can’t get over how supercilious and arrogant McInsane appears by refusing to make eye contact with Obama, or address his remarks to him, as Obama, cooly and calmly, does with him. Very telling.
People have a hard time looking you in the eye when they’re lying. Everyone knows that.
I also totally love how calm, conciliatory, and yet assertive Obama is coming off. Very nice.
McShit is standing there woodenly and aloofly with that rictus grin. Speaking of Obama in the third person like a total douchebag. Like a cruel dysfunctional parent dressing down his kid in public.
Oh god, 9/11. I didn’t configure the liquor for this. Let me find the scotch.
Joe Lieberman! Go McFuck!
Leiberman!
Cheers! Time for a refill!
Woo-Hooo!!!! Here it is! 911 911 911 911 911
He admitted torture!!!!!!
!!!!!!!
Geez! He went to torture! The fuck!
Wait, is Mr. fucking “I Approved Gonzo” talking about torture?
fuckwad.
Oh god, 9/11. I didn’t configure the liquor for this. Let me find the scotch.
Well, it’s good to know Guiliani didn’t make the trip for nothing.
Oh my. 9/11. blah blah safer now blah blah 9/11 and 9/11 and blah and new laws blah bipartisan blah blah intelligence (really this time) blah torture isn’t what it used to be (you kids get off my lawn) blah 9/11 blah blah 9/11 the brown ppl are coming.
Hey – according to current standards McCain wasn’t tortured.
asshole
Oh on CNN, the “red” line is pretty high now! Obama is talking about nuclear proliferation!
acrannymint: What I just said to Teh Spouse.
Keep talking about staying in Iraq, John. Only 2/3rds of the public disagree with that.
Anybody else hear a bit of weepitude in John’s voice when he said “If we fail in Iraq . . .”?
Ah, we honor the fallen best by creating more, right, McCain?
oh noes, an al quaeda base in Iraq! Which wasn’t there before our intrusion, but is now!
What a total fucking pile of horseshit he is.
Was bin Laden mentioned prior to this?
I forgot about this debate so I know I am a late comer.
Oh god, not the crap about missile defense systems again.
yes barry, tie his ass to Bush. Yes, bin Laden is still at large, thank you. Yes China, go man go.
Yeah, acrannymint. Obama brought him up a long time ago.
Keep linking Get-offa-my-lawn McCain to Bush, Barry, ! I want to hear that continually for the next half hour!
Single lens! Love it!
I just turned on the debates and Obama pissed me off in the first couple minutes by saying he supported “missile defense”. What the hell is he talking about? Thanks for adopting the Republican frame. Shit, man. I’ll read the rest of this thread in hopes that McCain has been flailing overall, but jeezus that was a stupid move.
$10 billion a month in Iraq. We wouldn’t be in this pre-Depression situation if Chimpy hadn’t had a jones for Iraq since BEFORE day 1 of his “presidency.” Thank you Mr. Obama.
Ooo, he brought up experience. Don’t open that door, McCain!
Obama’s laughing at McCain! I love it more and more the drunker I get!
“experience, knowledgment, judgment. Obama doesn’t have it.”
Nor do you, McLameInsaneGrampyLiarFuckhead.
“I know the veterans well. I love them, I’ll take care of them.”
Fuck you sideways wrong-way plane-crashing self-aggrandizing shitbag.
“knowledge.” I’m drunk.
I think McCain just cried a little when he said he doesn’t think Obama’s old enough to be president.
OMG — regarding vets, he’ll love them and take care of them? After voting against paying for their college? The fuck.
Listening and not watching, but McCain sounds wobbly apart from being wrong on everything. Just boring, but not an obvious loser.
POW!
Aaaaand there it is.
POW! POW!
Tequila shot!
POW argument! Where’s the whiskey?
POW!POW!POW! and, btw POW!POW!
McCain’s closing remarks:
“POW!! POW POW POW!!!!”
POW! Finish your bottles everyone!
Side note: I love Michelle Obama’s dress!
Bush must be put in the Hague.
Thank you John McCain.
Annnnd he said POW, gotta finish the suitecase.
“Jim, when I came home from prison . . .”
I can haz soundbite plz?
I think Cindy hates his guts.
Brewers up 5-1 over the cubs.
Mets down 6-1 against the marlins at home.
I’m sorry, was something else going on?
mikey
Non-event.
Please reassure me that McCain did terribly overall, because Obama endorsing Star Wars has me livid at the moment.
A commenter in a news thread mentioned a relatively new book by Thomas Frank called The Wrecking Crew – How Neocons Rule
One that’s on my purchase list, for sure.
For anyone interested in Canada’s neocons there’s a great article in The Tyee today.
Harper’s Plan to Make You Fear Minority Governments
http://thetyee.ca/Views/2008/09/26/MinorityFear/
Harper, Bush Share Roots in Controversial Philosophy
http://thetyee.ca/Mediacheck/2005/11/29/HarperBush/
I have a feeling that some anti-McCain veterans group is gonna use that “I love my veteran brothers” in some scathing ad against him.
WereBear – I was watching for the drug stagger as she went up to him.
Well, McCain exceeded my expectation. He didn’t pop a neck vein, shit himself and run around the stage yelling KILL KILL KILL KILL KILL.
Damn.
Other than that, meh.
Unfortunately, the media will also say McCain performed above what they thought.
Sigh.
I really hate all this talk about missile defense. Back in the first gulf war, I worked for an agency ( it was part of the Army research lab system) that did research and development for the DoD. One of the things the agency worked on was the Patriot missile. (aside not the Pow card again). The part my agency worked on (the proximately fuse) worked great, the guidance system (not developed by a government agency) did not. So I really don’t have a warm and fuzzy on “star wars”.
Disclaimer: I haven’t worked for a DoD agency for 13 years, so I don’t know how well the guidance systems are. I now work for the agency that administers Medicare/Medicaid
If America doesn’t pick Obama, Canada will take him.
Unfortunately, the media will also say McCain performed above what they thought.
I dunno, Gloria Borger on CNN just said that Obama held his own on foreign policy, and she’s pretty much a Republican hack.
I don’t remember who said it, but I think the only reason McCain was able to keep from losing it totally was because he sneaked some of Cindy’s valium.
Who’s watching which postmortem? I’ve got MSNBC on. They started off saying McCain’s folks should be happy with his performance. I’m not sure why — because he didn’t call Obama a cunt?
Oh fuck, Nora McDonnell. I hate her.
Buchanan calls it for McLame. How surprising.
I’m sorry, was something else going on?
mikey
Ah, mikey.
You missed the closing, POW!
POW! POW! POW!
There’s a country song in there somewhere. He’s gotta get something about his mother and a train in there, and he’ll have a hit.
I’m watching CNN, they’re threatening to “fact check” and all of their partisan pundits are saying what one would think.
Oh, I so can not wait until the VP debate. That is going to be delicious.
Disclaimer: I haven’t worked for a DoD agency for 13 years, so I don’t know how well the guidance systems are.
I am sure there is a success rate between 0 and 100 percent.
Oh and “It’s not clear who won.” Are you kidding me? Obama was way better, plus he giggled.
damnsle, I’ll catch the replay of the VP debate on SNL with Tina Fey. They’re bound to do it, no?
Nora? This Nora?
Be sure to check the streamer…
Oh and I am also an information technology type. I know the problems resulting from poor software (Microsoft Vista). So anything that relies on software raises a red flag
I also have to say that I am proud of working in the public sector especially since I now work for an agency that really has an impact on citizens. The people I work with are really dedicated however we are limited by what Congress decides to do.
Letterman: Sara Palin wants the VP debate postponed until after the election.
I am very pleased right now.
Breaking out the 50 lb bag of cheesies this evening, Truthy?
Fantastic? He looked almost as bad as Nixon.
OT, thanks for some of the lyrics Mikey, The Kings This beat goes on/Switching to glide. Damn, good times, good times. Now off to youtube to see if they have it.
I really hate the polls – it is such bullshit. I’m glad I forgot about the debate until the end because when I finally tuned it I was pleasantly lubricated. I don’t want to have to take high blood medication because of being pissed off.
Oh, poor Truthy, he was watching Bizzaro Channel.
On my tv, McCain looked like someone struggling to prevent veins from leaping out of his face like demented killer snakes.
I’m watching Countdown now. Olberman, for all his pomposity and egocentrism, looks like he’s got a good lineup.
McCain was authoritative, intelligent, witty
Laughing at your own jokes doesn’t count as “witty”.
Biden’s on CNN, calling McCain a loser. I love it.
I am just going to watch Bill Maher. I wish it was relatively live and had his comments on the debate
Even with his $5000 makeup job?
Dude, hi-def. He looked nervous and bad.
Lesley — the SNL redo of the VP debate is bound to be a comedown from the comedic value of the actual debate (although I await with bated breath Tina Fey’s rendition of the same; I shall be all agiggle).
Hmm, I’ve heard others say “pomposity and egocentrism” about KO, but I don’t see it that way. Maybe because it was so good, early on, to see someone upset about the same things I was getting upset about.
Ok, I have had too much to drink. Bill Maher is talking about the debate with Chris Rock (of course, it could be like the WSJ ad about how McCain won the debate 12 hours before it occurred).
Biden’s on MSNBC now. Busy night for the next VP.
Am I the only one who has had so much good red wine tonight that the very air tastes sweet again? Or am I just giddy from the obvious discombobulation effect that Obama had on McSame? Ah, the wine. That good ol’ Columbian red. Er, no, I mean, the Australian red. Shiraz. Wine. Why is my cat looking at me?
damnsle — because it’s Colombian, you schmuck.
That would be: Torture! Torture! Torture!
It worked for Obama in an early CBS poll:
This debate wasn’t for people who have made up their mind. So in that sense, I think it was quite successful.
Go up a thread. There’s one dedicated to the debate.
Thanks for ruining a perfectly good kitty photo. 🙁
We no like pikshur. Kittiz r prettie. That Man loks like corndog.
[…] Sadly, No! » Mark Hemingway: Too Big To Fail: this election is like a Phil Dick/Thomas Pynchon/Franz Kafka collaboration novel re-written for the small screen by the Monty Python cast and then reassembled with a completely random page order. […]
i don’t get it. the democratic party is 99.99% as bad as the republican party. why aren’t we allowed to criticize democrats?