Shorter Mark Helprin

Our Blindness

Never mind terrorists — we need to prepare ourselves for the next wave of the bubonic plague. Also, the Chinese invasion.

Idea stolen from busy, busy, busy, who stole it from Daniel Davies.


Comments: 3


Yeah, well, and a year ago liberal warfloggers sensed all was not going well with their big adventure and proceeded to explain to the rest of us why it was they still knew better than we did. So now it’s the Cucoo Ward at the Journal’s turn, except minus the one leg their liberal brethern were wobbling on.


Oh, I’m not going to bother my beautiful mind about all that now, not while I’m still tending to the blisters I got wearing stiletto-heeled alligator boots (with an evening dress!) at the Texas Inaugural Ball. You’d think they could build in comfy heel cushions. Damn underwire kept stabbing me, too. No fashion without pain! But what a lovely evening. Spotted several media people. Always shorter in real life, somehow, except for Wolf Blitzer, who’s about as tall as you think he’s going to be but he’s got a H-U-G-E butt. A little squiffy, Lon and I kept singing “Blitzer’s got back” all the way home. So there’s bubbly plague in China? It’s the drinking water, I’m sure. Malala — dear, I need more hot water for my foot bath.


Helprin forgot all about the bonobos. In a couple hundred thousand years they might evolve into a species capable of threatening mankind. And what if some of them convert to Islam?!

Extinction is too good for them, frankly.


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