The Sky Is Falling … On American Values!

Well, Tyson Foods and the Retail, Wholesale and Department Store Union (RWDSU) have gone and done it now. They’ve agreed to a new labor contract at Tyson’s Shelbyville, Tennessee poultry processing plant that replaces Labor Day with the Muslim holiday Eid al-Fitr, bringing the total of paid vacation days that cater specifically to the plant’s majority Muslim workforce to a staggering one in eight.

Observers on the right are quite naturally alarmed. Rhetorical boycotts of Tyson products are gaining pixelated steam and some disinterested interlocuters have even been forced to reluctantly conclude that it’s all Barack Obama’s fault.

A closer inspection of the wingnutosphere reveals more selective outrage:

Hoosier Army Mom is hard put to name an activity more un-American than allowing low-paid factory workers some small say in the scheduling of their thinly distributed respites from minimum-wage drudgery amidst dangerous machinery and bloody avian viscera.

And no wonder! The ingrates who loiter about at Tyson production facilities in her home state already take home a king’s ransom for their insolence, when by all accounts they ought to fall down on their knees and thank God each day that their betters banned indentured servitude in a long-ago moment of weakness.

Debbie Schlussel asks whether Tyson Foods — in making a financially neutral non-concession to a tiny portion of the bottom rung of economic society — may have ushered in “the beginning (or maybe the middle) of the end of America as we know it.” She also finds the whole affair ‘ironic,’ and concludes: “The United Dhimmi States of America. Tyson Foods is just a drop in the bucket compared to what we’re gonna see.”

The National Review’s Mark Krikorian, like Schlussel, is bemused by “the irony of a labor union dispensing with Labor Day.” Indeed, there are few things more ironic than labor successfully securing what it wants from management thanks in part to the existence of a holiday commemorating labor’s past successes at securing what it wanted from management.

Krikorian also bears bad tidings. In this particular instance, he cautions, “just complaining about illegal immigration won’t do.” And double drat to that, though it really rather won’t, seeing as how the Tyson workers in question are legal immigrants. Still, if ‘just complaining’ remains attractive, we would advise doing it more broadly about Muslims or labor unions or people with shitty jobs who want trivial things that will make them moderately happier and not affect you in the slightest.

Or better yet, chicken in general.

On the other hand, as Krikorian suggests, you could just complain about ‘elites.’ It seems that “[i]n this case, we see modern elites’ unwillingness to require newcomers to conform to our ways, and instead conforming to theirs.” Sounds vaguely sinister, doesn’t it?

To be fair, it’s difficult to determine precisely whom Krikorian has in mind when he describes ‘modern elites’ and their reluctance to do what it takes to put Somali refugees in their place — though it can be presumed he refers to a larger subset than just those people who employ the affected locution ‘won’t do.’ Perhaps he’s suggesting that tenured professors start breaking up union meetings … it’s hard to tell.

Krikorian’s main point, we guess, is that our ancestors were enlightened enough to whip the savages when they wouldn’t speak English, and goddamit, we ought to be, too.

And so, in conclusion: Fuck you, chicken. Fuck you for tasting so good and then betraying us to our enemies.

 

Comments: 94

 
 
 

Frist!
Can anyone do math? $13.50an hour (at 2,000 hrs a year) won’t buy a house in any of the rethug bloggers neighborhoods.

 
 

$27,000/y before taxes.

I think this election year is going to kill me. The magnitude to stupid is crushing my soul. Will to hope for the future of country… failing…

On the plus side, http://www.startrekonline.com/about_star_trek_online
If it’s any thing like a cross between http://www.eveonline.com/ and http://www.navyfield.com/ it could be crazy fun.

 
 

$13.50an hour (at 2,000 hrs a year) won’t buy a house in any of the rethug bloggers neighborhoods.

It will if it’s a house made out of employee-discount chicken! Mmmm … damn you, chicken!

 
Sophist FCD, in his rhadamanthine wisdom,
 

What’s wrong with immigrants these days? The old Irish immigrants were perfectly happy celebrating wholesome, all-American hollidays like Hallowe’en and Saint Patrick’s day.

 
 

Me dad got a “poll” in the mail a few weeks back from the state republicans asking about illegal immigration and all that. It got thrown out, but I told him he should have written on it, “It’s about TIME someone does something about the goddamn Irish!” on it and sent it back to them.

 
 

It’s not really Labor Day anyway; they’re talking about the one that’s in September, after which you’re not supposed to wear white shoes or some crap like that. Labor Day, which is on the first of May, is unaffected by this change.

 
 

“And on the tenth day, God spake of Paid Holidays”

 
 

Dollars to donuts May Day isn’t a paid holiday at the Tyson plant. The U.S. Labor Day is kind of a joke, true, but it’s the only holiday we have to celebrate working men and women.

 
 

Mentioning Schlussel is unfair. The woman can hyperventilate over Islamic perfidy when a Korean-American kid shoots up a technical college; actual Muslims actively accomplishing something they want has probably had her on the verge of suicide all day.

Eventually, cooler heads will prevail – by which I mean to say Schlussel and Oshry are going to exchange a series of emails which, by the time they stop fronting Yiddophony enough to actually communicate coherently, will have established that Somalis are only partially Pali-Irano-Pakis, but are 100% shvartzer.

Which will, of course, lead to these classy ladies exchanging perfectly reasonable fears about the threat posed by this dusky menace (cue the phrases ‘dark alley’, ‘children’, ‘SUV’, ‘sneakers’, ‘ski mask’, ‘”unemployed”‘, ‘insatiable Hebraeo-lust’, ‘curly hair’, ‘Willie Horton’, ‘Black Osama’, ‘urban’, ‘colored’, ‘jungle perversions’, ‘”homeless”‘, ‘vigilante justice’, ‘giant’, ‘ropy’, ‘black’, ‘Shaft’, and ‘liberal anal’ interpolated for several pages) until one of them climaxes and no more is said of it.

 
 

Here in China, the Great Firewall let about three paragraphs of Schlussel’s drivel through, and then it said “What the FUCK? It’s an embarrassment to our nation to let this shit in!” and shut her down.

 
 

If there wasn’t a Schlussel, I’d have to invent one. Or something. Anyway, if I ever slightly waver in Liberalism, I just have to hear about whatever crazy stuff Deb’s screaming about this hour (or Savage or Fox News or Mark Steyn etc. etc. into infinity), and I know that my side is at least much less wrong than theres is.

 
Gary Ruppert Number Two
 

Here in China, the Great Firewall let about three paragraphs of Schlussel’s drivel through, and then it said “What the FUCK? It’s an embarrassment to our nation to let this shit in!” and shut her down.

I don’t know. It sounds like something the Great Firewall would approve of. In the vein of, “Yeah! WTF do these so-called ‘workers’ think they’re entitled to, anyway?!”

 
 

Who sold who out?

 
 

In the comments on the original linked news article, you find this:

Go ahead and let them have their little holiday and prayer rooms for in time every knee will bow and tongue will confess that Jesus Christ is Lord.

Maybe they won’t put a bomb in the chicken.

The founding fathers will roll over in their graves if they could.

I am still proud to be an American , just not of what she does sometime.

Hopefully the commenter is right, and our long-standing fears of chicken-bombing are unjustified.

 
LA Confidential Pantload
 

I’d be a lot happier if they were processing chickenhawks instead of chickens.

 
 

And now, every time one of these dumb fucks gets a tummy ache after they eat chicken: OMG IVE BEEN POIZONED BY ISLAHOMOFASCISTS!

And they will selflessly not seek help from medical professionals but instead stay crouched at their stations, sharing a blow by blow account of their symptoms.

On the other hand, as Krikorian suggests, you could just complain about ‘elites.’ It seems that “[i]n this case, we see modern elites’ unwillingness to require newcomers to conform to our ways, and instead conforming to theirs.”

In Montgomery County (and it may be statewide) the schools no longer hold sporting events on Friday evening because Orthodox Jews could not play. The few assholes who babbled about assimilation (or other stupid shit) were completely ignored.

Anyway, I don’t think even fellow traveler on the LoonyVille Cross Town Express would want to conform to Krikorian’s ways. Fucking pigs ain’t Kosher.

 
 

Perhaps they are using the Alanis Morisette definition of ironic. Either that or they just can’t follow through with the idea of concessions being made by a giant cock-loving corporation. Perhaps there’s something Freudian about their irrational fear of manual labor on their shrink-wrapped pre-choked chickens, but you’d have to be a rather hen-pecked philosopher to determine what came first, the 72 virginal eggs of jihad, or the rooster crowing at the coyotes.

 
 

Wing … nuts.

Oh, I get it now. Wing…nuts.

 
Mouthbreather in the comments
 

Even the beautiful Jewish people have never demanded their holidays supercede the ones already in effect here.

However, the ugly Jews have been a pain in the ass.

 
 

Indeed, Fats. And don’t forget:

chicken…hawk. CHICKENhawk.

I see a pattern developing here, and it’s not just the grease stains left by super Sup-R-Size Bukkit O’ Wingz.

 
 

“You think Ronald McDonald go down to that basement and say, ‘Hey, Mr. Nugget, you the bomb. We selling chicken faster than you can tear the bone out. So I’m gonna write my clowny-ass name on this fat-ass check for you!’?”

 
Leon Trotsky, Exile-in-Mexico
 

Speaking as a Jew, I’m still pissed over the beautiful Christian people demanding their holidays supersede mine. When I have kids, I’m going to have to explain why Elijah is in a bunny-suit hiding eggs instead of having a nice meal with us and giving him a dollar if he finds the matzo bread.

I have to explain to *my* kids why our ancestor is dressed in a fursuit.

DAMN YOU, CHRISTIANS!

I bet the Romans are ticked too.

 
 

Islamopoultry?

Islamochicken-hawks?

Ah:

Poultrifascists!

 
 

This is truly a symbolic moment–the moment that the love of the hysterical left (in this case embodied by Tyson Foods, a vegan co-op and gay sex commune) for labor and socialism was actually EXCEEDED by its love for Islam, which is really fascism which is really also socialism anyway which is indeed central to my point which is being made with such detail & care, etc.

 
 

Meanwhile, the Laziest Wingnut Alive (and that’s saying sumpin’) has surfaced at Malkin’s crazy rib shack:

Can someone with organizational skills put together a boycott of all things Tyson? They probably have other brand names that are part of the company too. Buy nothing whatsoever from this gutless, unprincipled company, or its branch products.

 
 

It occurs to me that the only way anyone could boycott Tyson would be if they are a Tyson customer. Which would mean they’re a stupid smuck who, with every package of chicken they buy, is paying a 15% premium (Tyson chicken is “enhanced with up to 15% of a broth solution” – that is, salt water and chemicals). While I’m not surprised by the notion of stupid wingnuts paying $3 per pound (or whatever the going price is for supermarket chicken now) for salt water laden with chemicals, or by the idea that wingnuts are also too stupid to figure out that the extra they’re paying is for something that makes the chicken taste like ass (even the cat won’t eat it), you’d think it would occur to them that there are easier ways to go about bringing an agri-business giant to its knees. For example, I pretty much got the shitty Tyson chicken ejected from my local Kroger simply by filling out a complaint card for management about how the Tyson chicken tastes like ass and can’t be eaten by anyone on a restricted salt diet. They called me and I went through it with them, and within a month, they started stocking unadulterated chicken – first in small quantities, then it took over more and more of their refrigerated case. In the months leading up to this action on my part in defense of American values, the adulterated crap was all they were stocking. Now, it’s at most 10% of what’s on offer.

Stupid wingnuts.

 
 

Also, it’s clearly the Muslim workers at Tyson who are the threat, not this Malkin commenter:

Because of this crap I bought a AK47 and 5000 rounds of ammo with my STIMULUS check….We no longer are Americans. Just a facsimile of what we used to be.. Illegals and PC everywhere. Our enemies actually own our country through owning our real estate, our companies or our loans. We are just a bunch of windbags without the courage to do squat.. I want to know when we are going to band together as citizens and as state militias and stop the selling out of America. The authorities at all levels aren’t doing anything except supporting this crap.

 
Dragon-King Wangchuck
 

On the plus side, you could have bacon on your grilled chicken sandwich – ha take that you Totalitar-Islamists.

On a much more serious note, this is obviously a sneaky plot by Teh Big Labor to get more days off. Note that Eid falls on a different day every year (and not like Easter or other movable feasts) because the Islamo-Atheist calendar has only 354 days. Thus the lazy Tyson Foods slackers are trading in 1/365.25 days off for 1/354 days off for a net gain of something like three percent! That’s right, with this new holiday schedule, anyone working at Tyson Foods for a third of a century is going to get a whole extra holiday!

 
 

Jesus, DKW … this was supposed to be the new Gilded Age for crissakes, and here we’ve got Joe Hill running things!

 
 

“Because of this crap I bought a AK47 and 5000 rounds of ammo with my STIMULUS check….We no longer are Americans. Just a facsimile of what we used to be.. Illegals and PC everywhere. Our enemies actually own our country through owning our real estate, our companies or our loans. We are just a bunch of windbags without the courage to do squat.. I want to know when we are going to band together as citizens and as state militias and stop the selling out of America. The authorities at all levels aren’t doing anything except supporting this crap.”

_____________________________

Shorter: that fella who shot up the liberal fag church had his head in the right place.

 
 

Awesome. Now we just have to subvert the pork and beef industries to homodhimmiabortovegifascism and Hussein Obama X’s vegetarianism laws won’t even have to be enforced, they’ll be followed voluntarily, leaving the femistasi free to enforce the thrice daily exercise regimen.

 
 

Maybe they won’t put a bomb in the chicken.

Phew! The wingnuts have started their Tyson boycott just in time to avoid being blown to bits by a Chicken Cordon Boom.

Way to dodge the pullet, wingnuts!

 
 

Because of this crap I bought a AK47 and 5000 rounds of ammo with my STIMULUS check….We no longer are Americans. Just a facsimile of what we used to be.. Illegals and PC everywhere. Our enemies actually own our country through owning our real estate, our companies or our loans. We are just a bunch of windbags without the courage to do squat.. I want to know when we are going to band together as citizens and as state militias and stop the selling out of America.

And you thought the War on Christmas was bad! This guy’s taking you out if you don’t take Labor Day off.

 
 

Oh, and:

The Tyson management is clearly a big bunch of APPEASERS!!!!!!!!! Appeasingly appeasing.

 
Leon Trotsky, Exile-in-Mexico
 

The Second Age of Domestic Terrorism is on the way, folks. First we’ll treat Muslims like they’re people, then we’ll vote a black man into the Presidency, and their masks will really come off.

Shit, if you though the Clinton era was bad, that guy just acted like the stereotypical depiction of a black man. A real one will blow their feeble little brains.

 
Leon Trotsky, Exile-in-Mexico
 

Now we just have to subvert the pork and beef industries to homodhimmiabortovegifascism.

That one may be a little difficult, y’know, what with the haraam standard.

 
 

That one may be a little difficult, y’know, what with the haraam standard.

I was wondering about that – would it forbid working with pork, or just eating it?

 
 

We are just a bunch of windbags without the courage to do squat.

Out of context, I can’t say this is wrong. Pretty alarming when you see it’s part of a pep talk to go shoot people, though.

 
 

This is obviously a darstardly islamofacist plot to turn us all into gay mooslims by infecting the nasty processed chicken with halal cooties!

Read the ingredients label closely.. it says this: Poultry byproduct, Water, Salt, Sodium laureth sulphate, Satan.

 
Dragon-King Wangchuck
 

That one may be a little difficult, y’know, what with the haraam standard.

They’re working on it. Remember that they’re Islamo-Vegans. Soon we’ll all be eating nothing but Human-Analog-Halal-Soylent-Green.

 
Leon Trotsky, Exile-in-Mexico
 

I was wondering about that – would it forbid working with pork, or just eating it?

Well, considering the torture of Muslims by pouring pork grease on them, and so forth, I have to think they’re not keen on working with it either. I’m not an expert on Muslim purity law, I’m not even that great with the Jewish dietary law I’m supposed to be following.

(God tempts me so with the delectable taste of bacon.)

 
 

It’s permissible to do naughty stuff in the service of the greater good: Hussein Obama pretending to be a Christian, Mohammed Atta pretending to enjoy the services of strippers,etc. Plus, we might be able to wear special haram-proof safety gloves in preparing for Pork Chop Hill II, the bacon bombening.

 
 

We no longer are Americans. Just a facsimile of what we used to be.. Illegals and PC everywhere.

Damn you, Bill Gates!

 
Trilateral Chairman
 

Comically enough, this change will probably end up being good for *both* sides. My guess is that a large proportion of the majority-Muslim workforce took (or tried to take) a sick day or vacation day on Eid, meaning that the plant would be understaffed and less efficient. Thus, swapping Eid for Labor Day doesn’t increase the number of days off, but it *should* increase productivity and reduce hassles for management.

Contrary to the schtick about the “beautiful Jewish people,” the same sort of thing happens in heavily Jewish areas. I’ve worked in several places that made the decision to close down on Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur, simply because 25-30% of the workforce would be out that day and nothing could get done. (Maybe it’s only the ugly Jews who are observant, though.)

 
 

I can see where the purity of the culture of the rural South is so threatened when African workers are brought in. It’s not like that’s ever happened before.

 
 

Fuck you, chicken.

We used to get this for take-out all the time. Then they changed their garlic paste recipe, or something, and it’s never been the same since.

 
 

Debbie sez “Since I keep kosher, I don’t eat Tyson Foods products anyway, but I call on you my readers to boycott the company.”

All four of them

 
 

D. Aristophanes said,

Also, it’s clearly the Muslim workers at Tyson who are the threat, not this Malkin commenter:

Because of this crap I bought a AK47 and 5000 rounds of ammo with my STIMULUS check….We no longer are Americans. Just a facsimile of what we used to be.. Illegals and PC everywhere. Our enemies actually own our country through owning our real estate, our companies or our loans. We are just a bunch of windbags without the courage to do squat.. I want to know when we are going to band together as citizens and as state militias and stop the selling out of America. The authorities at all levels aren’t doing anything except supporting this crap.

He’s on his way to stand up for America and shoot up one of those damn lie-brul churches right now! Or maybe he’ll put a twist on it and shoot up a Wiccan coven instead, thereby killing dirty liberals and them godless pagans – a two-fer!

(Don’t tell him it was Republicans who sold the real estate, companies and loans to the Evil Empires – for cold hard cash – it’ll break his widdle heart.)

 
 

Labor Day’s toast anyway. Fuggeddabottit!

Probably in 2011, for the 10th Lachrymosary of the “Terra Attacks of Nine Eleven,” whomsoever is president, knowing how hard the allied chambers of commerce would oppose making a NEW National Holiday, will declare the substitution of “National Patriots’ Day”–or some such jingoistic crapola–for poor, old, doomed labor Day as the ‘end-of-summer’ holiday.
And why not?
Nobody giffafok about Labor anymore anyway. We’re ALL middle class now. Yeah! Honor them Patriots….

 
 

If you want a vision of the American future, imagine a Chicken McNugget greasing on a human face — forever. That is Islamofacism.

The Chicken McNugget is the canary in the coal mine of Liberal Fascism.

The Labor Day is the Jew of Faschicken McNuggism.

 
 

Wow, some of those comments on the Times-Gazette article were appalling. Muslims should remain “second class” citizens in America forever?

I have to wonder though why they just couldn’t ax the paid holiday for birthdays to replace it with the Eid Al-Fitr holiday.

 
 

So these clowns don’t have any problem with Tyson polluting the shit out of the environment or abusing animals, but they’d better not do anything nice for their Muslim employees or it’s boycott city.

Where the fuck do they get these idiots, anyway?

 
 

Tyson also specializes in turkey, or if you like, Turkey, where Islamofacism rules the day! It all adds up!!

 
 

SInce I don’t eat chicken in any of its forms, excepting nugget form of course, I call upon my readers to do a little research for me so that I might write a book about why when low-wage factory workers organize to collectively bargain in their own interest, such a manifestation of the bastardization of capitalizm, is actually the embodiment of Islamofowlism in its most sinister form. And by that, I mean chicken bombs of course, which is central to my point.

*burp*

Mmm, Steakums.

 
Santa Claustrophobia
 

I’ve often wondered: If the future of the US is apparently to be controlled by Muslims, exactly how is that supposed to happen when there are apparently so many people who fear just such an outcome and should be willing to fight against such a thing?

Or have I discovered the secret that their fear of a Muslim hat will never be outpaced by a desire to actually do anything about it?

I imagine these folks during the American Civil War (on either side really…) posting furiously (e-mail, telegrams, whatever) about how awful the opposing side is while standing idly by in the belief that others (lower classes?) will be in better positions to save their sorry asses from actually doing anything at all.

Of course, after Tennessee, maybe it’s a good thing these Professional Outragers are too lazy to do much about it.

 
 

sweet DA. You hit this one out of the park.

 
 

Here’s what I don’t get: why isn’t anyone outraged that Tyson foods just couldn’t go ahead and slide all their workers an extra holiday? Would it really have killed them?

Also, in the news story, two false statements are made about Eid. First, that the date is announced on short notice. Uh, no. It follows the lunar calendar, people. It’s like the Jewish holiday. Ask any Imam, he can tell you when Eid will be next year. And the next. And the next. Second false statement is that Eid always happens in the fall. Incorrect.

 
 

Jewish holidayS. Urgh.

 
 

Because of this crap I bought a AK47 and 5000 rounds of ammo with my STIMULUS check….We no longer are Americans.

Wouldn’t this True Patriot be better off buying a fine American weapon instead of one of them commie guns?

 
 

I’m at a loss to see how this could have even the slightest affect on people who don’t work there or even have family members who work there.

I mean, if the people directly impacted by it don’t have a problem with it, what the fuck difference does it make?

Hey! This is kind of like the gay marriage thing, huh?

 
 

Actually Aristophanes, it is not the giving the poor factory workers a voice that I disagree with, it is replacing Labor Day with a holiday of a people who don’t like us, our culture or our religions. Go on over to their country and see how much pandering they do for you, the “infidel”. I have no problem with paying them for their spiritual holiday, let them trade for Christmas or Easter, but don’t change an American holiday that has been around since before Tyson existed and make a majority take the minorities holiday off if they want paid for it. When people come here they need to show some respect for our traditions and the way we do things.

 
Dragon-King Wangchuck
 

Hey! This is kind of like the gay marriage thing, huh?

You have to remain vigilant for the slippery slope. If we give the muslims Eid, then soon box-turtles will be taking the solstices off. We have to nip this thing in the bud or dogs will be celebrating the Thunder Dragon’s Blessed Rainy Day on the government’s dime!

 
 

Go on over to their country and see how much pandering they do for you, the “infidel”.

And your point is that this would be an even better place to live then there if only we emulated them by not ‘pandering’ to minorities … huh, wuzza?

I have no problem with paying them for their spiritual holiday, let them trade for Christmas or Easter, but don’t change an American holiday that has been around since before Tyson existed and make a majority take the minorities holiday off if they want paid for it.

Um, yes. None of this right wing outrage would have happened if the labor contract switched a Christian holiday for a Muslim one. Um, okay (whistles anxiously)

 
Dragon-King Wangchuck
 

(whistles anxiously)

You have to admit that you’re enjoying the spectacle of wingers standing up for Labor Day.

 
 

I think we should nominate Debbie for the Pullet Surprise.

 
Leon Trotsky, Exile-in-Mexico
 

The people working at Tyson’s don’t like us, our culture, or our religions? Islam’s a religion we have in America, so’s their culture. Pretty sure they like themselves too, and given that they’re legal immigrants, they are “us”.

In short, fuck you, lady.

 
 

It’s a (sniff) national tradition! We’re all Wobblies in the face of Islamofascism!

 
Leon Trotsky, Exile-in-Mexico
 

And y’know something, if they’re getting paid for taking the day off, I don’t think the majority gives a shit who’s taking off to actually celebrate and who’s taking off to grill some food in the backyard.

 
 

Let me see if I understand this.

The working theory here is that Tyson and the labor union are part of the cultural “elite” who are trying to destroy the country.

Really? Have they ever met anyone from Tyson or a labor union? If they are part of the cultural elite, then Rupert Murdoch is a down-home NASCAR dad from the heartland.

Sheesh!

 
 

When will these nebulous, unidentifiable elites cease their elitism and realize that the Krikorians of this world have a way of life superior to theirs?

 
Leon Trotsky, Exile-in-Mexico
 

They’re not unidentifiable Vic!

Indeed, they’re incredibly fiable. You see, an ‘elite’ is anyone not like the wingnut, who does something in any way different from the wingnut, and who frightens the wingnut by not adhering to their frantic demands to be more like the wingnut.

 
 

Meh, they seemed pretty logical about it, all things considering.

They had the votes, could’ve replaced Christmas if they’d wanted. No, they were polite and picked the holiday that always seems to go in these cases, Labour Day.

Hell, its the working man’s day – let him decide when to celebrate it!

Kevin

 
 

I think Wingnutistan is upset because Tyson routinely abuses its employees in a way that should make them a model Republican employer. So when they concede even a trivial thing like this, the wingnuts are extra disappointed–almost like spurned lovers.

 
 

I have no problem with paying them for their spiritual holiday, let them trade for Christmas or Easter, but don’t change an American holiday that has been around since before Tyson existed and make a majority take the minorities holiday off if they want paid for it.

Um, yes. None of this right wing outrage would have happened if the labor contract switched a Christian holiday for a Muslim one. Um, okay (whistles anxiously)

Aristophines, I think Mom was trying to say that if the wogs get off for this Rama-lama-ding-dong, they should have to come in on Christmas. Evidently Mom has never worked in a factory, or she’d know that they shut down on Christmas because you need a full staff to run one, not a random handful of Muslim employees.

 
 

I never realized all these conservatives had such warm feelings for Labor day! You would think these guys spend the day marching the streets with posters of Eugene Debs!

 
 

one shudders to imagine the shock waves of indignation that must have rippled through the right wing blogosphere equivalent of the 1620s, when news of the first thanksgiving was disseminated. K-lo-hontas say pilgrims no good. great spirit finished now. old way of life dead. it is a good day to die.

words, come to think of it, more applicable to her case now than ever

 
 

Who would you rather have process your chickens, Islamofascists or re-conquistadors? That’s the dilemma in a nutshell for wingnuts, who tend to forget who pays the bills in their party (i.e., the likes of Tyson Foods, not your random cheeto-stained wingnut-welfare recipient).

 
birdseatbugs, child of at least four cultures if not more
 

[…] it is replacing Labor Day with a holiday of a people who don’t like us, our culture or our religions. Go on over to their country and see how much pandering they do for you, the “infidel”. […] When people come here they need to show some respect for our traditions and the way we do things.

Soooo, by your own logic, people traveling to an Islamic (or a primarily-Islamic) country shouldn’t be expected to “pander” to Americans; in fact said Americans should “show some respect for [their] traditions and the way [they] do things.”? Golly, that’s awfully tolerant of you.

So tell me: I think that I should get the 14th of August as a paid holiday — a day to continue the work of Jonathan Myrick Daniels. Is that okay with you, or are Anglicans/Episcopalians too much like the Catholic church with their bells and smells to be allowed any consideration?

What about Lent and Advent? Those are times of preparation, and I think that I should get at least one extra day a week, maybe two, so I can be sure I’m adequately prepared. No, no, fish in the cafeteria on Fridays won’t work (and there’s the Catholic church again!) — dude, fish is meat. And then there’s Holy Week: a full week of things to do and places to be. Can I get that week off, with pay and the blessings of you and yours?

It should be okay with you, ’cause I’m a Christian, and America’s a Christian nation, right?

(Oh, and one last thing — I’m gonna have to be gone on All Hallow’s Eve and All Saints Day, too. Is that gonna be a problem?)

 
 

Debbie sez “Since I keep kosher, I don’t eat Tyson Foods products anyway,[…]”

So, since I presume she doesn’t raise her own livestock, that must mean there are companies catering to her religious requirements. Pretty goddamn un-American of them, I’d say.

 
 

So, since I presume she doesn’t raise her own livestock, that must mean there are companies catering to her religious requirements. Pretty goddamn un-American of them, I’d say.

Oh, mds, you couldn’t be more mistaken. At least one of them is an employer after her own heart.

 
 

The people working at Tyson’s don’t like us, our culture, or our religions? Islam’s a religion we have in America, so’s their culture. Pretty sure they like themselves too, and given that they’re legal immigrants, they are “us”.

Yeah, and considering that we’re not fucking Turkmenistan – we don’t have a national religion or culture or anything that needs ‘defending’ from harmless minority cultures, and we don’t have a Glorious Father of the People codified into our constitution – we don’t seem to be what you’re thinking about when you say ‘us’. You know what, I don’t like Islam – as an atheist, I find the religious devotion a mixed blessing and the holidays are only marginally less silly than Anglo-Protestants’ – but these guys aren’t baying for anyone’s fucking blood.

In short, fuck you, lady.

And the horse you rode in on.

 
 

I have no problem with paying them for their spiritual holiday, let them trade for Christmas or Easter, but don’t change an American holiday that has been around since before Tyson existed and make a majority take the minorities holiday off if they want paid for it.

Oh God yes, getting rid of Christmas in favor of an Islamic holiday woudn’t ruffle any feathers – it’s not like the right wing isn’t already fighting back against an imaginary “war on Christmas” or anything.

And yes, HoosierArmyMom’s point is apparently that we need to act more like teh axis of evil. We can learn so much from their xenophobia and lack of respect for infidels!

They really have their heads screwed on straight over in Iran.

 
 

I have no problem with paying them for their spiritual holiday, let them trade for Christmas or Easter, but don’t change an American holiday that has been around since before Tyson existed and make a majority take the minorities holiday off if they want paid for it. When people come here they need to show some respect for our traditions and the way we do things.

Yeah, who the hell does that company think it is, setting its own scheduling policies and all? Whoever was executive officer of Tyson foods that week certainly didn’t follow the procedure to have that decision ratified at a special bi-weekly meeting by a simple majority (as it is a purely internal affair), no request for comments was posted in advance, what I’m saying is we did not all get to vote on that and it’s simply outrageous.

 
 

Those commenters at the Shelbyville paper are going absolutely batshit:

I cant take my teenage girls to Wal-Mart without the Somalian men and I mean MEN gawking at all of us like perverts. Let me go to Wal-Mart on a bad day and everyone will know my real name, it will be listed on the jail intake!

Workers told me the Somalis refuse to use toilet paper at Tyson. Tyson allows them to use cups filled with hot water to dip thier hands in after they make a bowel movement, then go back to cutting chickens.

My daughter told me the Somalians also wash their feet in the commodes. Some nationality maybe not the Somalians also bring in whole dead fish and cut them up, mix them in a large bowl with something else and eat this, several eating out of the same bowl with their hands. The same hands that go back to handle chicken.

And on and on.

 
 

tb,

Thanks man, I needed to throw up in my mouth a little…

And I need stronger fucking drugs.

 
 

And yes, HoosierArmyMom’s point is apparently that we need to act more like teh axis of evil. We can learn so much from their xenophobia and lack of respect for infidels!

As far as I can tell, the major difference between radical Muslims and radical Christians is that the radical Muslims run around blowing people up and flying planes into building to kill people, and the radical Christians get the U.S. Army to do the killing, mostly with their own children, on the U.S. taxpayer dime.

Under the influence of these people, the U.S. now kills without talking, ignore diplomacy, disrespect all views of everyone including our “Allies” and tortures.

Bin Laden seems to be winning, one attack and he getting us to act as stupidly and cruelly as he does.

 
 

I am speechless

 
 

Man that Somali toilet thing is so gross, it makes me feel as if uncooked chicken is unsafe and disgusting. I mean, no more so than it already is, mind you, but still.

Go veg!

 
 

SomeMoron said:

Go on over to their country and see how much pandering they do for you, the “infidel”.

Uh, assuming that most of the workers at the Tyson plant are there legally, “their country” would be the USA. Dumb shit.

 
 

The thought of wingnuts gorging on fatty pork products in protest fills me with warm feelings.

Also: nausea.

 
 

None of these loons have noticed that the US Postal Service, under the Bush Administration, has repeatedly issued postage stamps that commemmorate Eid as an observed holiday. Who’s pandering again?

 
 

The commenters at that newspaper site are charming. The ‘Somalis don’t wash their hands and will poison us all!1!1ONE!’ is a new one to me, though.

This is fucking Tyson Foods. The processing plant is full of chickenshit. As are you.

You don’t like this, God-fearers? Go and take a fucking job at the industrial chicken slaughter factory. (The one near where my wife worked was mainly staffed by indigenous South Americans.) Oh, and did you celebrate Memorial Day appropriately this year? That is, with a cookout of fucking terrorist chicken?

 
 

It’s gonna be chicken every Sunday at Moosehall from now on. And I hope Tyson employees enjoy their paid holidays. I think I’ll celebrate with them, as an envoy from the Jews.

 
 

Did I mention that we have five chickens (two Rhode Island Red and three Wyandotts) and they’re all Muslim? Yup, where headscarves, pray to Mecca, the whole bit. It’s hopeless. I better bone up on my Koran, and get my prayer rug back from the dry cleaners.

 
 

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